Dermatillomania (Excoriation Disorder)｜My Story 

Seriously! We love you Cassie! Im glad you can talk to us.

Nia Sanders yes I agree with you she is wonderful and amazing 😉 love her a true honesty and beautiful soul.. love you doll

Nia Sanders being in denial about it isn't good. it's obviously important to her. people pretending like there isn't something on you seems a little bit more cold hearted to me then someone honestly being concerned about it. I didn't think it was a disorder maybe a bad habit but I also pick at my skin. there's something on my leg right now I'm trying not to pick at! the thing about the sensation of touch is that it's all in your brain. there is actually no such thing as tickling itching or pain. these are all just illusions of your own consciousness to keep you aware of what's going on in your body. for some reason it seems like our brains are telling our bodies that we are itching when we are not so we scratch ourselves quite literally till we bleed and then when it scabs over we pick at that. when I rub my hand over my skin and I feel a scaly itchy inconsistency I have to remove it. recently I started using itch relief creams and bandages and that seems to help with the picking and the itching. but for some reason I can't stop thinking about it and that led me to try to find out whether or not it's a disorder and turns out it is so yay for me

Anonymous Li How dare you say that Nia is being insensitive. What she said made sense, and I feel the same way. This lady has a great personality and that's why I watch her. It has nothing to do with the way she looks. How about you put down what you want to put down and leave others to what they want to say ok.

Nia Sanders What a lovely comment. X

ScreamingToWriteLOVE you're beautiful too!!! Lots of love!!!

It’s ok it’s hard. I’ve scarred my face majorly and I’m still dealing w it.

me too i just spend 3 hours picking at my face

I’ve had this as long as I can remember. I haven’t scarred myself as bad as others or maybe I’m lying to myself. I just recently bought really good quality temporary tattoos on etsy and amazon and cover the scars so I can feel confident when I wear shorts or T-shirt’s. I’m going to try and get the nerve to see if I can get real tattoos to cover the scars or at least some. The temp tattoos have been lasting about 10-12 days. Just thought I would share what I have found that makes me feel more confident.

Same

Me too. ❤️

@@scarletnxphilim2534 don't worry...just remember that you aren't alone...you are precious...you are pretty the way you are....🥺🥺💜

same :(

I feel bad when they ask me what are those black spots in your arms (I’m African American) I just say it’s a skin condition but I always feel especially bad when someone from my family says that nobody is going to want someone with scarred and picked skin :/

@@Allycat-vn5rl can I just come there and hug you!? 🥺😭😭😭💜💜💜 I know... It hurts so much... Plus I Even pick a lot on my face and my family keeps pointing them out... Taunting me... But ... We need to embrace ourselves... I know it's really hard... But once we will learn to love ourselves the way we are.. Loving our imperfections... Loving our scars... Things will get better... I know they surely will... 💜💜 Just remember you are a fighter... Just buckle up and defeat the self hatred... ☺💜🌸 Love you buddy... You are not alone...🌼

My excoriation disorder is intertwined with keratosis pilaris as well! 😩 it’s so hard to “get better” when there’s always so many bumps to pick always available and literally within arms reach

I pick when I feel the skin is not smooth, I thought I was the only one 😔

@@Allycat-vn5rl Same!!

Omgosh I friggin have this

Thank you I too have spent more than an hour

Ok I just watched the whole video and every single word you said, every single thing down to the little blood stains on your clothes or bedding, it all applies to me. I just wanted you to know that someone else experiences that stuff and it was really comforting for me to hear that someone else goes through it.

+SupSarahxx (I keep replying to my own comments because it won't let me edit them lol) Not like these are cures, but some temporary reliefs from picking that I can suggest from personal experience are: -Acrylic nails -Spinner ring or any other fidget toy -Gloves to sometimes wear at home (get the ones that let you tap on touch screens) -Putting any tweezers or tools used to pick with, in a block of ice in your freezer. Yes.

I'm so sorry for your suffering. xo

DianaTPascal Thank you

+SupSarahxx Going to second the gloves suggestion. I have white cotton gloves I buy online and wearing them at home, even when I sleep, has helped a lot. And my cats seem to like them, too.

you're just gorgeous

+kaaluh Mance she is a literal angel.

same :(

Exactly! I put a name on it! And I'm not the only one!

It's the most peaceful feeling to realize you're not alone. I watched this video a few months ago and burst into tears because finally, someone explained what was wrong with me, and that I'm not just gross or sick.

Rosebud G Me too...

Same here

christian news

amber dorrier Awww 😭😭😭😪 you are pretty ✌🏾️✌🏾️✌🏾️

Lena Thomas thank you so much 😊

I disliked it for the rant around 20:00

OK, liked it now because what she said around 28:00 is very true. History doesn't care about people for being pretty.

Is it netter now? I hole it is. Im also 16 and struggle with my arm-area a lot...

Me too I'm literally also 16 years also and I have never had a Normal life because of dermartillomania I can't even go out without wearing 😭 longsleeve to cover my arm I don't really pick my face but my two arms are full of bruises and scars

My heart..Oh:(

SO TRUE ELISKA, BUT WHEN YOU'VE BEING BULLIED JUST FOR YOUR SKIN YOU CAN'T HIDE THE EMOTIONS IT PUTS ON YOURSELF! YOU TRY AND HIDE THE PAIN AND SUFFERING FROM ALL THE STARES AND LAUGHTER PPL CALLING YOU FUGLY I THINK GETTING CALLED FUGLY IS WORSE THAN BEING CALLED UGLY! THAT POEM THEY SING TO TELL BULLIES TO BK OFF *STICKS AND STONES MAY BREAK MY BONES BUT NAMES WILL NEVER HURT ME* HALF IS TRUE THE OTHER HALF A LIE! I'VE JUST BEING BROUGHT UP WITH BULLIES! I GET CALLED FLABBALOT BECAUSE I ENDED UP LOSING WEIGHT SO FAST DUE TO STRESS, I COULDN'T FIND MYSELF EXERCISING DUE TO MY OTHER DISABILITIES, AND THAT PUT ME DOWN EVEN MORE! I GET CALLED A SMACKHEAD BECAUSE MY SCARS LOOK LIKE INJECTIONS TO THEM IDIOTS! I RECON THIS BEAUTIFUL YOUNG LADY AND ALL OFF US WHO'S GOING THROUGH HELL OFF HAVING TO LITERALLY SIT ON OUR HANDS/TIE THEM UP! SHOULD MAKE A STAND AND SHOW PPL THAT THIS IS A MENTAL HEALTH ISSUE AND WE NEED MORE SUPPORT! NOT BULLIES MAKING OUT WE'RE SOMETHING WERE NOT AND THAT WE WILL FIGHT ALL THE WAY TILL WE HAVE WHAT WE NEED! ADVERTISEMENTS SHOWING THAT IT'S NOT US BEING STUPID NOR US BEING PATHETIC NA THIS IS A ILLNESS AND WE CAN'T HELP OUR SELVES THAT'S RIGHT WE HAVE O.C.D!! NOT A DRUG HABIT NA WE WILL SHOW YOU BULLIES NARACISTS WHOSE BOSS! AND FOR ONCE WE'LL SHOW THEM UP AND HOPEFULLY TEACH THEM A LESSON! THAT YOU DON'T SAY OUT YOU LOOK IT UP AND IF YOUR ABLE TO HELP WE'LL BE EXTREMELY GRATEFUL! HAHAHA SORRY I KINDA GOT OVER EXCITED THAN BUT DOES SOUND LIKE A FAB IDEA X

Thank you for giving awareness! it is very important for us ❤️

That's why I always drag those that say people cut "for attention" MOST people that cut you wouldn't even know because they do everything in their power to hide it. Yes I'm sure there are people here and there that do it for attention for even if they do it "for attention" there's still an issue that they have to resort to hurting themselves for attention, that's a problem in itself. Also that people think self harm = cutting when it covers sooooo many things from cutting to burning, hair pulling, bruising even EDs and picking, you could argue drugs and alcohol addictions could be a form. The last thing a self harmer wants is attention which is why they often take their pain out on themselves instead of others or seeking help because they DON'T want people to know. Sorry I'm not talking at you cause you obviously know all this just ranting about conversations I've have with ignorant people. I love how they'll say "just get help" cool, thanks bro, never thought of or heard that before, sooo fucking helpful. Not everyone has the $ or time for private therapy sessions which may go on for months, years or even for the rest of your life. Metal Health treatment is such a fucking joke in this country but what do you expect from place that sometimes won't even help insurance less people or people that weren't referred to a specialized DR. Like WTF can't I just go to whatever DR I want, why to I gotta go see one that can't ldo anything for me and basically pay him just to sent me to someone else that is generally even pricier and even less likely to be covered by insurance, if you even have it. If you even do have it most people pay for insurance they can barely afford so that they can pay huge co pays that they can't afford before getting help. So sad. Yeah, you could go to the ER but they don't fuck around and won't think twice about keeping you against your will because you may be a danger to yourself then you gotta pay for the zombie drugs they give you (gotta sell a liver for some of these pills prices) Also have to pay for all those days they made you stay there against your will.. UGH blood boiling. (referring to the USA in here)

+nya:węh I completely understand why you ranted and the desire to rant. it's unbelievably frustrating. and when you really need help its devastating

I burned my self not to feel or for attention, but for a way to end an anger so powerful that only what I did to myself with the fire and knife could end.

+KoolKat Killaz

+Thrift Thick (Cassie) We love you, Cassie. :)

exactly, she is hard on herself! I wish she get over feeling bad about it, seriously, come on!!!

+lal Jad ???? thats rude lol.

+lal Jad what may seem easily removed from feelings from yourself, when living with something like this, people can be quick to judge. I don't know you but if you suffer with something such as this I would believe you would have more compassion for her. I personally do not have this but I deal with a skin problem that some would look at me like WT?? Please be kind with your words. This is a huge step for her to talk about this. Which is the second time, more in depth though. Tossing out your comment in that stance makes you look and seem so cold. Please be kind. We are human and have many differences at which people more than less can be sharp or rude to other people's "idiosyncrasy" which is so low in energy and character. Be mindful of your thoughts and words please. If not you will have a hard time because this will reflect back to you. And that is no way to live. I hope you will understand.

I so feel you on the Lupus - It's shitty. The hair / eyelash loss I'm experiencing has been intense! x

Lola Hernandez god bless

Ty 😙

Lola Hernandez It's not even rare, it's just that people don't want to talk about it because they're ashamed, they feel guilty or they're embarrassed.

Lola Hernandez I was just diagnosed a few months ago...my mom also has lupus

'Foopa' - that word, trademark it, trademark it now!! I love it

+Jenna Merryweather it's FUPA lol it stands for fat upper pubic area

+Mikayla Anne hahah it's ace, I've never heard it before!

+twodice416 you're right, mental illness is very important. I'm happy that Cassie's channel brings you happiness :)

Alexis Rain Actually I've done that a couple of times with socks because I couldn't stop picking and also pulling out my eyelashes

I tried that it didnt work..ugh!

+Kerri Williamson thank you Kerri.... you're going to make me cry haha ;_;

+Thrift Thick (Cassie) you made me cry! I've never liked myself or my body or anything and then suddenly I broke out after having super clear skin and I gained some weight. I know that it shouldn't bother me and acne and stuff happens but when it happened to me, It really put me in a very, very bad place. I know these are two completely different things but to have someone put themselves out there and be as brave and freaking perfect as you are makes me feel like I can be okay. Because you're okay. Even with your scars. I know this was so hard for you but thank you so much Cassie. you're amazing.

I agree! She is such a beautiful person inside and out!

Also I have an autistic son who has sensory issues that caused him to do things that were not healthy.

it could be any reason they thumbed down...

There are many reasons.

They disliked it because it's to fucking long

Then they don't have to watch. I don't understand stupid people that hate people for no reason other than there own idiocy.

Heyyy, I have psoriasis wicked bad, too, and the worst of it... Is on my Face! It totally SUCKS! I've had so many questions, when it flares up, like, Oh, u have wicked wind burn, or sunburn, or u gotta love the old What happened to your Face?! Ughhh, Nothing!! I also, stupidly, used a Steroid cream that my Derm prescribed me for my elbows, etc.. I used it on my FACE... for about 15 yrs! 😨 My face, started to look almost see thru, around my nose, and on my chin, and wrinkly... From the stupid steroid crm... I went to the Derm again, and she was like Noo, don't use that on the face! Now, at that point, my skin was addicted to the steroid! Ugh! I've finally been able to wheen off that shit, to like maybe once a month, thank God, and use a natural soap and cream, that so far, besides salt water, lol, has been the only thing I can use. But, omg, when I was first trying to wheen off the steroid crm, my face was soooo red, swollen, flaky, and raw! Oh, and now, when I go in the sun, or tanning, I have to cover my fave or use like SPF 50, bc I get wicked dark spots all over my face. It's crazy! Anyway, I wanted to tell u, ur not alone in that! And if someone doesn't want to touch u, fuck em! It's their loss, not urs, bc who wants to be friends w someone like THAT?! I'd say, Thank you, smile, and think to urself, they showed u their true colors, right off the rip, and the type of dirt bag they are!

bodaciousqueen: I'm SO SORRY this happens to you!

My husband has it all over his body from small spots to huge patches. I mean there are very few spots he doesnt have it. You should never feel shame or embarrassment. You are still beautiful.

bodaciousqueen I know you pain. I had it severely a few years ago. it randomly popped up 2yrs after I had a mirena IUD placed, no one would listen when I said that's the only thing I thought triggered it. I had perfect skin beforehand. The plaques got thick & bled. I dealt with it for 3yrs knowing deep down the IUD had to be the culprit. I had plaques, big and small head to toe. The *week* I had mirena removed plaques I'd had for 3yrs (that did nothing but increase size) started fading. Within 2 months 90% of the psoriasis was completely gone. I still get pea sized spots here/there, right now I have 2-3 little spots, but that's it. It's been 4.5yrs since the mirena was removed & the few little ones that appear go away after a few months with regular care. I'm in no way saying mirena "gave" me P, but I'm certain ingredients in mirena didn't mix well with my chemistry which triggered it. I never took meds for the P BTW. I know it's not that easy for most P suffers, but I hope you find something that gives you relief. I do still itch insanely, my entire legs itch even though there's currently no P on them. Nothing I do helps that.

bodaciousqueen My brother in law has it VERY bad. It's literally all over him except for his face. When it flares up it seems like he's in pain and it hurts my heart. Sending you lots of love!

I have it too and I'm currently having cognitive behaviour therapy to get to the bottom of the anxiety. I also ritually clean and check my house but have no conclusive on-paper diagnosis of OCD. Nor do I want one to be honest. I have so much envy for people with nice looking skin and yet I'm my own worst enemy. We will stop and we will get better. It helps to know I'm not alone xx all the best to you in your future xx

+Kate Chivers all the best to you as well! thank you so much, I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I understand that completely, I can honestly say I am my own worst enemy too, but with a good support system we can conquer it! if you ever need someone to talk to who understands, I'm there!

yes its awesome she did this video. I feel so ashamed but to know Cassie struggles with this and others as well makes me feel a little better.😊

Me too I had no idea others had it and that makes me feel so much better

I do this too. I don't say I have the disorder because I've not been diagnosed. I don't pick severely but I identified with all the reasons for picking Cassie gave. I take medication for anxiety and depression. Makes a lot of sense.

+Lynnette Mooney thank you so much Lynnette.... seriously, I ALWAYS appreciate and look forward to your comments because you've been such a big source of love and support on my videos. It means the world to me to know that you're there rooting for and empathizing with me. Thank you for being beautifully you over the years and for sticking with me

Internet hugs coming your way Cass

Sending positive vibes to you Cassie 👍

I agree. Cassie your a beautiful inside and out. there has been so many days were my depression as been at its worse and your videos make me laugh and give me inspiration. I totally understand I pick at myself too. I love you girly best wishes. xoxo

dermatillomania*

+Emily Davison 😘😘 Showing your vulnerability is tough, especially to the world. I couldn't do it! Ha

Btw I rip at the cuticles too, and I am literally sitting here doing it now. I also used to be a severe nail biter, and I remember being really embarrassed of my hands. I literally know I'm doing it but my will to stop isn't big enough...sigh.

..I realize that; I'm trying to say that everybody has their struggles in life and that it's important to remember that we are all just as 'imperfect' as the next person. It's not meant to romanticize or belittle a condition at all lol it's meant more as solidarity against feeling isolated or ashamed for things we fight with or can't control. I know how isolating shame can be, but I have to remind myself that other people have their issues as well and this helps me cope. Maybe that mentality isn't for everybody, but it works pretty well for me, so if it consoles her even the smallest bit it's worth it to write imo.

But Its crazy how I understand every sentence you say in this video

+Katelyn Najafi I felt the same way

i have the same problem, but now i use coconut oil and sometimes bio oil and it really helps scares to fade away

+Lilolilu doesn't work for me

In my reading and researching, as I suffer the same problem as THRIFT THICK, I learned that this condition my start with peeling or picking the quicks or cuticles around your finger nails til they bleed, i do recall doing so in my childhood. So pay attention to her fingers also, the obvious places but only say something to her if you plan on helping to get some kind of help. it really is embarrassing

I'm so sorry! I have no answers but will be thinking of you and your sister. ✨❤️✨

I am bipolar...ocd..anxiety disorder, ptsd ..dermatillamania.....it's not uncommon for ppl to decide they don't have the issues. Trust me she will relapse I have many times over the past 23 years. I wish her much luck and you as well it's frustrating on both sides. You just want to be "normal". The thing she doesn't realize is that she is beyond normal....those of us that suffer are the most sensitive of souls. My advice don't give up on her..and don't let her give up on herself.

LisaA Adams, my sister has the same problems. I'm a mental health therapist, which makes it very difficult to speak to her about it because she immediately thinks I'm putting my professional skills to work and not being her sister. So I tread lightly. I just ask her if there's anything I can do to help. She also does the medication thing, but that's very common with mental health patients. The important thing for you to remember is that she would stop if she could. Being there in a supportive role is super meaningful and goes a long way.

I appreciate your videos so much 💕

wow, good luck with that ❤❤❤

+Isa N thank you💕

I have had stretch marks since I was 12. Trust me they are not like the ones I received having my son. But they have never mattered. Know that you make you! No mark or stretch mark defines you. Your personality your passions your internal desires and the things you do and how you carry the brilliance of yourself is so radiant! Hold your loves near and dear I'm turning 40 soon and have lost my mother and father and many friends. Ignore the people that are out to bring down your light. They bring nothing but ignorance and have allot of growth to do! I have imperfections and have found myself in magazines. I married a photographer and he made sure to show me in the light he saw. Which was not like I saw myself. I had a dear friend say to me, honey, people do not see you as you see yourself. That hit home with me because I knew she was right. Know that you are beauty in your own way. Can you imagine a world where everything was the same. Cassy said it, there is beauty in imperfections💚

+MzClementine thank you so much💙 your comment made my day and also boosted my confidence

Fyi I've dealt with major depression and anxiety for two years now.It was a long tough road but it eventually gets better.Anyone going through any sort of mental disorder,don't give up,even at your worst when you're curled up in a ball on the floor crying your eyes out,don't lose hope that you'll never get better because you will one fine day.

+lubna s that was really beautiful to hear, I needed that today! thank you!

+Danielle Lambert aww lots of love.Im glad I could help.

+Kaitlyn McG thank you so much Kaitlyn, it means the world to me to know that it was helpful for you in that way. It really isn't something we dermatillomania sufferers ever talk about (it's just so weird and shameful to bring up, even to friends.... like, how to do you just say 'so I know you're noticing all of the scabs and blood on me, wanna talk about why I do this to myself?' haha it's just so strange) but your support and love is so welcomed and appreciated

sending you so much love. have you ever tried meditation? i know for some people that helps them feel calm, maybe that could help a little? I wish I could help you somehow, youre a lovely person

I will also fight them.

I don't break out any more so it's just scarring but I still understand even though they are two separate problems .

+Haley b same! plus a huge ass ugly scar from a mole-ish thing. insecurities suck x

+cece edwards yeah I mean honestly I'm sure won't wouldn't care but I do . I got a tan and it got 10 times better. Maybe that can help you:)

+Haley b people*

I'm white as a paper and can't tan naturally haha :( maybe i'll try false tan someday. Thankyou! and I'm happy you're better x

(And as you tell more about it, i notice i kind of do this too.. I used to be a nailbiter and then at somepoint switched to biting my lips.. And i pick at my lips when i'm stressed still, but luckily for me that heals pretty fast and is not noticeable when healed. Well there you have it, guess thats my thing)

-

Did you actually get diagnosed?

+Ann Foster ummmm it doesn't take a rocket scientist.

+gtay36b In terms of diagnostics it at least takes an actual doctor...

I had no idea I had this disorder either, I thought I was just weird

+freesamplecrys is your skin similar with Cassies with the red spots everywhere?

I have schizophrenia, dermatillomania and I'm bipolar. My whole life has been a roller coaster

I understand how frustrating dealing with this could be. I don't have the condition you do so I feel wrong trying to say I hope you find a way to cure/control it. I really don't know the right words to say it but I hope you can get you're condition to a place where it doesn't make you feel not beautiful. I hate to see others depressed and unhappy. I wish you all the happiness in the world. I don't have much but if I could I would give you all the happiness I have. Just remember there are so many people out there rooting for you so keep your head up girl!

that's what exactly I thought. I just thought Cassie just has a sensative skin. I usually bite my nails and now particularly thumbs. My boyfriend just hold my thumbs whenever I try to pick them out, and he haven't said it's disgusting or anything else. Of course the best thing is to overcome the syndrome, but that's nothing you should be ashamed of!

people have asked me if im a burn victim and always im getting asked if im contagious. it is so uncomfortable for me :-/

+Elizabeth Adams I have psoriasis as well and I pick at the skin till I bleed. For me, they are in patches and mostly in areas that are not too visible like my scalp, ear and inside my nostrils. I don't know if you have tried topical medication but it does help a bit. I wish you all the best!

+Vick Lowe omg i have it in my ears too but not my nostrils!! sounds super tough )-: i use topical creams but honestly what helps me the most is healthy eating and exercise :-) thank you very much for your kind response!!

Hengameh Vlizadeh You can stop it. Keep trying don't lose hope. I used to do it when I was 3, 8, 13, and I started again at 22. It will get better.

Weird both me n my daughter were diagnosed in early teens n w me it got worse before it got better i have trichotillimania i pull my hair out started in early elementary.. sure i spelled that wrong lol..my daughter has dermotillomania like u.. She was diagnosed around 5th grade n still at 17 has good n bad it depnd on her stress n nerve levels n because i dealt w uncuntrolably pulling my own hir out n i completelyidentfy. The zoning out ..n the fact thatit depends on stress n nerves n gets wrse when people point it out..idk .

+april nickles Also, I do have a phychiatrist. I am currently being prescribed antidepressants and benzodiazepines (vallium) for my anxiety, but have never mentioned to my phychiatrist or GP about my picking. When my doc sees the marks I just told him its an allergy and he will usually just prescribe a cream for it. So with all that medicine I am taking and now a name for this I an tell my doctors, what else can be done to cure or ease dermatillomania? I mean do i get my dosages increased? Or is it more simple now that I have been educated because of this video, my phychiatrist may have a mental treatment for it?

+april nickles I didn't realize how disordered I had become either until watching this video. I'm waiting until my psychiatrist's office opens this morning and I can call and schedule an appointment so I can finally admit the truth to her. I always just brushed it off when she asked about my marks as well, and said I had eczema. But now I feel like, idk, I can finally come clean about this embarrassing secretive thing I've always done to myself. You should try to tell your doctor as well. Do it with me today? Please? I'll comment back in a couple hours when the office opens (:

I wish you both the best of luck Emily and April, much respect to you for talking about your problems,I know that's not always easy to do.I'm rooting for y'all♡

+Emily Asmr hope you got on ok Emily X

I do the same! I use tweezers to rip off the scabs and the little later of skin that builds on the wounds. It's really hard to stop

I wrote this comment before watching the whole video. Also as the subject is quite triggering for me, I'll take a way to watch it all through. I need to take breaks in between. But I completely agree with you Cassie. Picking can be such a peaceful and meditative state, twisted as it may sound. That's why I try to seek this meditative state in different ways now to make picking bit by bit unnecessary.

+Ayla ASMR I have a lot of keloid scars and after winter it is so hard for me to not wear scarfs (I have a lot of them on my chest), so I know what you're going through. The staring can get intense and uncomfortable.

***** the most annoying thing is when people think I can't tell they're looking. I CAN ALWAYS TELL

***** kids honestly make me laugh tbh haha. But that's also indeed because they actually ASK and not just stare. Gotta love people.

I used to bite my nails too, and I do pick at my acne, on my back, which has always been pretty intense. So I understand dermatillomania too. I've completely stopped biting my nails, which is very promising for me. Instead of pulling my hair I've started... breaking it off? At least it doesn't leave bald patches. I want to grow it long and it always looks weird and uneven because of this. :( I am trying to fix all of it. I think the scars shouldn't be a big deal, and you're still pretty. But what we ought to fix is the reason we do it, and to manage to.. love and take care of ourselves properly..

I guess the point was... You deserve to love yourself! Don't be hard on yourself because of something that you can barely control. Love yourself enough to get past it.

I have trich too

Gosh this is so hard too look at, oddly enough I had this , it was triggered when my hair became greasy or at least I thought it was . The higher percent of time it was triggered by stress and or when I was simply bored. I'm telling you now you will be strong one day and no matter how hard it will be to get rid of this so called mental disorder you will . It all started as a comfort thing, until one day I realized I had a bald spot on head I began to cry and vow never to pull my hair again, so I dint sometime at night where I couldn't handle it I would pull chunks upon chunks of my hair out , until one day it just went away. STAY STRONG BOO I believe in you ok ? Ok

Thank you both, and good luck to you Andrea.

You talking in depth about this disorder made me realize that I have it as well, but not as severe. I can totally relate to completely zoning out and then realizing that you have just given yourself a dozen of new potential scars and inflation in places where there was literally nothing there hahah

And as for people seeing this in public... I can tell you the exact moment when i stopped caring about anyone's opinion. It was summer, i was on a bus, and it was soooo hot outside that i just had to wear an open back shirt and some of my scarring was showing. I had headphones in but I was listening to an audio book and it just finished, but i just kept my headphones in. I could clearly hear everything around me and i hear these two girls talking about me. One of them was like "ewwwww look at her what the hell" and her friend was like "yeah that bitch needs to take a shower or something!". I turned around and said "I actually just took a shower about an hour ago, thanks for your concern". They immediately went silent and didn't say anything until they got off the bus. I got upset of course, but then I thought to myself "gosh I'm so glad I have shitty skin instead of shitty personality". And then I never wore sweaters in summer because screw everyone.

P.S. Mederma might help the scars some. Some people with excoriation disorder have gotten results, but you are lovely just as you are.

Cassichu-Art, bless you, I am over sixty, am bi-polar, have anxiety, and just realized I have this too. Yet, my life isn't a misery. I have struggles, but I have much joy. Hang on, and believe.

Also mindfulness techniques and learning how to replace the negative repetition behavior with something not harmful.

actually I pick skin as a symptom of my adhd. I found that tactile stimulation and more obviously the repetition really helps relieve my stress from not being stimulated. I scratch my head and rub my face mostly, but I also bite nails and pick skin around my nails. The picking is the strongest relief, so I try to limit it to really stressful times. I found that directing the need for tactile stimulation to things like head massages and similar non harming ways. And in class I draw a lot, even when the teachers were always annoyed. Also Cassie you're beautiful and you're so brave to speak up about this, never feel any less than what you are worth which is all the love and good in the world.

It is actually related to the addiction center of the brain which is why it becomes such a bad problem. I've been picking at my skin and biting my nails since I was 4. My Derma is primarily linked with my OCD and anxiety instead of any ADD or ADHD (I have neither and my other Derma pals don't either). Another thing is that while picking does cause damage it's really not anything like self harm. I self harmed for 7 years and the two behaviors weren't connected at all. Self harming for me was done with the express intention of punishing myself or feeling pain. I did it because it was what I thought I deserved. Derma however isn't anything like that; I pick because I have to. I don't pick because I want to hurt myself or punish myself I do it because I have to and I hate it. I'm not sure if that makes sense but it's the only way I know how to explain it. Basically I just wanted to share my 2 cents and share my experiences to show you another side of the spectrum with this disorder :)

yeah, her smile is so real and honest, is really all i can see.

100% agree!! I love her face & expressions & happy loving soul that is so obvious & exudes from her

such a lovely comment!! hit the nail right on the head! I completely agree with her! I'm too busy watching you to notice anything, you're wonderful!

Totally agree

so true.