DM’s, What are your favorite useless magic items? 

We had a 5 Int Ranger in our party who would pester the Wizard with questions, asking him to give explanations about everything that looked magic, but didn't take well to complicated answers, so the wizard fashioned a "Rock of Magical Knowledge" and gifted him, telling him if he ever needed answers, he could ask the rock, and tap on it to receive an answer. In reality tapping on the rock would always ever cause it to respond "It's magic, don't worry about it". He still has that rock and still finds the answers acceptable.

Wand of fireball is a classic. PC thinks it's got x uses of the Fireball spell, but instead the wand produces x shots of fireball whiskey.

My DM gave us a necklace that can summon a table. He was intended us to grab a leg off the table and use it as a magical +1 club. However, due to our party being sub-optimal (I am the rouge, and de facto tank as I am the only martial class) the only player that wanted the table necklace was the gnome bard, who then used the table as everything from a tent to a step stool. I guess not really "useless" as much as "used in every situation except the expected use"

When playing Lost Mine of Phandelver, the Dragonborn Sorcerer died very early. The players had since been using his lifeless body as a mutlitool to throw, attack with, stop a door, helmet on a stick trick, etc. When they found the brazier of green flame, the dipped him in to temporarily turn him into a +1 corpse.

My favorite was Rock of Deception. When thrown would distract enemies near by.

The ring of secret invisibility is quite useful actually. You ask your party members to close their eyes and, if you "see" you are still visible, someone is watching you.

Dagger of Vengeance. Ebony black dagger made specifically to kill a corrupt king, and only that king. The king died years ago, and the enchantment will not end until the dagger kills the king, which literally cannot happen.

Ring of fire detection - If while being worn the wearer is burned the ring shouts fire quickly and concisely. If you take sustained fire dmg the ring will shout once a round.

Early D&D. Our party found a scroll that would enchant a weapon to +2. The party member who found it immediately applied it to a cooking spatula. The DM determined that the spatula would be ineffective as a weapon. He did however rule that meals cooked with the spatula would restore 2 HP to all who partook of the meal and rested overnight.

So, one of our DMs set up the Slightly Cursed Items Shop, featuring such items as: - The bear stick that summons a bear from . . somewhere. - The jar of bees. - The scarf of waterbreathing that only works when dry. - plus some others I can't remember. We bought several of them. Used a few, too. No such thing as useless at our table, heh heh.

So for the boots of noisy speed, I forgot that the speed of a character is measured in feet or 12 inches. When I read the description, I actually thought for a second that the boots make the wearer grow 10 legs and that gives them a boost of speed but also a loss at stealth...

The amulet of Solar Invisibility. It shines extremely brightly when worn out in the open (not under your shirt or anything). Basically, it blinds everyone near by (including you)

As a DM, I love creating magical items that are mostly RP flavor and then seeing what crazy ways people use them. My favorite one is the Everchanging Hairbrush, a two sided hairbrush where one side is boar bristle style and the other has teeth like a standard hairbrush. The Standard hairbrush side grows hair longer and the bristle brush changes the hair color. Its mostly used to dye hair and grow it out for funsies. Our Tabaxi used it to create a non-magical disguise self to turn them into a long hair of a different color and pattern, as well as changed the colors and patterns of the parties horses to help disguise them all a little better.

Mine is the Ring of Dessert walking, you can use this ring to easily walk on top of any cake, cookie, ice cream, or anything similar. Sadly, this is hard for the players to not notice, because while desert and dessert get confused often when writing/typing, it's easier to notice while speaking, so unless you the merchant has a thick-accent or speaks super fast, they'll probably notice the difference, and hey, might still buy it for the shits and giggles

The pig and duck summoning items are useful for giving comfort particularly in backstories. To always know that a friend is around the corner is a wonderous gift.

What I have learned is that there is no such thing as a useless item. Some items just require more out of the box thinking to figure out how to make them useful.

The rock of healing would actually be amazing for getting up downed party members as long as they aren't on two failed death saves.

IDK where this goes: A cion stuck in a rock. Dwarf Fighter: "Alright, I want to attack the rock." DM: "Roll Damage." Dwarf Fighter: "I don't need to roll to hit?" DM: "It's a rock and you're a dwarf." Dwarf Fighter: "That's racist."

Oh, I've actually got one! In a campaign that fell apart a while ago, out tiefling druid got ahold of a.. magical swear jar. Whenever a PC swore around it, they would suddenly lose control of themselves, walk over to the swear jar, and put a gold coin in. It was mildly annoying to most characters but hilarious to mine, because despite me swearing like a sailor irl, my dragonborn lad always tried his best to sound very polite. Not only that, but putting enough money would restore some of the jar owner's spell slots. Despite that, everyone almost unanimously decided to get rid of it

I imagine a workshop somewhere where a warlock, mage, and an Artificer make stuff while high on drugs but forget what it does when they become sober but are too scared to test the items out until thier drunk, hence why the descriptions are lacking.

My favorites are: Hag of Holding - a regular green hag that will follow the party and carry anything they give her. She doesn't fight (neither with or against the party). However, she doesn't want to part with things given to her and will use all of her non-combat abilities to avoid giving things back. The party learned that when they gave her the druid and she had higher strength modifier, than the barbarian. Orb of Finding - perfectly uniform blue orb that turns to face anything the person wielding it desires. You can't mark the orbs surface in any way. Amulet of Feather Fall - when activated, it turns into a feather and falls off.

I once gave the party a bag that when it opened it let out the sound of a bunch of chihuahuas barking

I just want to say that the ring of invisibility (that turns invisible when worn) would make a good Item for a character or npcs that are married but trying to hide the fact. Imagine two nobles or such being in a relationship that if known would cause a scandal and players are supposed to look for evidence and find a mysterious ring while searching a counts mansion, but while looking afterwards can never find it and never see it on his person...

I had a dm make the most evil of useless items. It was a broom of eternal dew. It was useless as it would always just make things damp and dusty. Great for party tricks I guess

The Pet Rock - Allows you to cast find familiar to summon one Pet Rock. It's primary ability is that it has proficiency with Cook's Utensils (though because it is a rock it does not have the limbs to use them). The reason our DM gave for it having this ability is "Can you smell what the Rock is cooking".

The closest thing to a useless item, I've intentionally put in a game was a bronze shortsword that gleams with a pure white light when drawn and sheds light in a similar radius to a torch. That's it, it doesn't even count as magical for the sake of overcoming resistance. However, there was an item that came into existence as the result of a joke in my previous campaign. Basically, while the party was on a quest to help a small settlement with increasingly hostile spirits, the Cleric had imbued some salt with Turn Undead in order to ward off spirits from the local's homes. The Rogue ended up eating some of it, getting literally shocked by it, and ended up liking it after a joke roll. So later on when it ran out, the Rogue wanted some more of it. So he bought a massive five pound of salt and took it to an enchanter to have it imbued with lightning to sate their strange addiction. Hence the creation of Electric Salt, a useless version of Cleansing Salt that quite literally did nothing except have microscopic arcs of lighting on each little flake.

The one about the flute of summoning ducks sounds like a great way to open a Peking duck restaurant!😆😆😆

Used bag of holding... Sounds like the dreaded glitter bag of holding my party has. We now are in possession of a glittery dragon's tail.

The Rock of Healing sounds useful in 5E. Throw it at / hit a downed party member, they get a failed death save and then immediatly can get back into the fight.

ORB OF ARCANE DETECTION A crystal orb that locates the nearest magic object within up to 1 mile. (Always points towards itself)

I actually made a whole d100 table for the Secondhand Bag of Holding a while back because I love the concept so much. The effects include finding the object you were hoping to find, finding a different object, wasting your turn searching though the bag, finding an unknown object left by the previous owners (as determined by the DM), finding all sorts of random gunk (glitter, wine, glue, acid, healing potions, etc.) coating the drawn object or the lining of the bag, or, if you're really unlucky, you poke your finger through a threadbare portion to the bag, causing you, the bag, and everything within to get sucked into the Astral Plane. I love it.

The pipe of smoking must be the DnD equivelant to a wape-pen

A ring that makes you invisible when no one is looking. I wonder if the creator of that ring was inspired by the movie, mystery men. It was one character that could become invisible if no one is looking at him.

Well, the Cape of Good Hope would be good for raising the group's morale; especially should the party be able to think of a way to bring that long-term victory into fruition. But of course, this is coming from someone who likes inspiring others.

It was actually a set i hombrewed up. The articles of classing, these were clothing peices that made others see you as base classes in dnd no matter what class you actually were. The hat of wizarding, the shirt of rogue-ing, the belt of barbarian-ing, the boots of palindin-ing, the ring of cleric-ing, the pants of fighting--these clothing items made others (npc or pc) see all you actions as normal for the reapective class, ie: you cast fireball all others will beleive that barbarians can cast fireball and only a high WIS roll can deter them. The whole set when worn caused low WIS characters to take psychic damage and would nulify eachother to no longer apply their mental effects....my party only found the ring and then our game broke up due to life reasons lol

One of my favorite things about D&D is that the term useless should and almost always will be between quotation marks. Someone will almost always find a use for whatever the item might be.

A DM of ours gave away an IM MOVABLE ROD. A rod that when activate remains in position..... until you move it....

The shy compass: A magical compass that can take you exactly to where you want to go. However, if anyone looks at it, it starts spinning like crazy and doesnt stop until no one is looking at it again. In my world, it was given to the God of War by the trickster "Nameless God" so he could find his lover the Godess of animals. But when the God of War refused to pay the Nameless what he asked for in return, the Nameless cursed it turning it into the useless piece of scrap it is now. Theoritecally, you could undo the curse, but that would require learning the true name of the Nameless God and use his own power to dispell it. That or finding him and convincing him to do it himself, which may actually be even harder.

You know, that ring of attunment would actually be pretty useful on a high level artificer.

The die of power. one day after a cliché situation where the player’s character gets a brief glimpse of the game itself after rolling a nat 20 on perception when there was nothing to perceive, i secretly handed a note to the dm saying “i sneak a d20 thats been enchanted to return to the users pocket if lost into the character’s pocket” (my character made it as a joke awhile ago and forgot about it before telling anyone) The dm then came up with a secret home brew rule that he told us about later called “the placebo affect” which is his excuse to fudge rolls, plus the technicality that the player rolled the dice in game as opposed for a skill check gave the dm TONES of le way

Lol. One that became a favorite was THE SOAP. Basically had a mercenary with chronic foot-in-mouth disease and we were going through this magic mansion. He picks up this bar of soap, drops it, and it returns to his hand. OOH! Nifty! Turned out to be a 'cursed' item. Started with the basic returning thing, but then the DM got the brilliant idea of adding that it causes soap bubbles to form in your mouth every time you said a naughty word... which merc did frequently. HOWEVER... He grew sort of fond of the soap and frequently threw it at things to test for traps.

I gave my changeling player "The Sword of Screaming" it's a rapier that when swung yells a word of the player's choice loudy. Naturally, he taught it to yell "C-NTMUFFIN!!"

Frame of Asymmetry A frame for a painting that will slightly tilt and is almost impossible to set perfectly straight without fixing it in place with alternate means. I hear that a certain son of the Grim Reaper in Soul Eater would be very...occupied...if he were gifted a painting with this frame.

The rod of unending questions. (Requires attunement) Upon attuning to this magic item, the rod disappears inside you and no longer takes an attunement slot. However, it leaves behind a curse. While under the effect of this curse, you can only speak in questions. If you speak in anything but a question, you add 1 to a running pool of damage that is inflicted upon the curse being removed. This curse may only be removed by means of a greater restoration spell or similar spells. When the curse is lifted, the rod is removed from your body and lands in the nearest unoccupied space within five feet of you

one of my favorites was the Scroll of Duplication. when used it made another scroll of duplication and the first crumbles to dust. used it as renewable toilet paper.

I rarely find a situation I can share a story in for these cause I’m only in my first campaign. However this fits that rare situation. Our DM gave us a magical item called “essence of grandma” once per day you could ask the item for advice and A grandma would respond. It wasn’t anybody in the parties grandma just some random Grandma

This is one of the funniest videos I've watched on this channel. That being said, I have a story too. In our campaign, there was a store called D.O.G. It stands for Desirable Omnipresent Goods and was owned by a large humanoid shiba inu. You could get whatever you wanted from this shop (including Doritos, which our characters had fun discovering). Most importantly was that the Nintendo DSi shop theme was always playing in this store. Now, our bard had a magical lyre that would give various effects based on what song was played. If he played the DSi shop theme, a dog would appear and give him a random magic item from D.O.G. to rent for an hour. This item could also be bought on the spot if he so desired. One time, he got a freaking Poké Ball from it.

I gave my party a ‘broken bag of holding’. It only holds as much as a normal bag that size:

I think giving low level gear at high levels makes things more interesting. Maybe the weapons import? Maybe you loss all your gear and have to use these lower level equips to get back your good equipa.

If it was me, the Orb of Slope Detection would be that it automatically drops from your hands when you're on a slope, instead of just rolling. Enjoy trying to catch it again.

The Exceptional Sword. It's a very very good looking hand and a half sword, it's got encrusted jewels in the hilt, it looks really good... Other than that it's a regular hand and a half sword 😎.

This is actually one that I excelled at as a DM. For context my players went to a town of magic that had been torched by a Hydra, and to drive home the fact that this was a town of family's I pulled a Mulan. Amidst the wreckedge of the village they found children's toys. 1) The glow balloon ring: can summon a glowing balloon never brighter than a nightlight bulb, they can float like filled with helium or bounce like filled with air but pop when too far away. 2) A wind up frog (literally a wind up frog that croaks and floats on water despite it being made of metal) 3) The Cheep Cheep Slippers: gain a +5 to stealth but every roll is at a disadvantage. Needless to say...I think these things did exactly what I intended.

I find that the rock of healing is basically the American healthcare system

Krillin from dbz, while arguably the most useless character regularly in the show, was literally the strongest human by the end.

My favorite (useless) magic item is a pebble that when your on your knees and have your hands together with the pebble it will magically say "amen".

The Bag of Halving is infamous among my players. They were given it early in the game, and proceeded to put anything they didn't want to keep equipped in it. They went quite a long time before trying to take anything back out of the bag. That's when they found out any item they put into the bag only came out as half of itself. They went weeks thinking it was a "bag of having" and that it worked just like a bag of holding. I had to fight back so much laughter as my players pulled out extra weapons they had been keeping in there just in case with bow strings dangling and swords rendered useless. They didn't get rid of the bag though. They loved it and thought it was amazing.

This wasn't a useless magic item per say, but I once gave my party a loincloth of holding. It acted like a bag of holding while someone wore it. The player who used it regularly put a sentient magical sword into it. I did also once give the same party a +1 maul. This was useless to them since none of them had proficiency with martial weapons. I think they eventually traded it to some devils for safe passage from the Nine Hells to the Prime Material plane through a portal. My favorite magic item that I gave that group I personally called a Wild Magic potion. Basically, if you drank the potion, you'd roll on the Wild Magic Surge table. The party found around 20 of them while looting an old wizard tower, and the warlock drank 3 in a single combat, after which he got addicted to wild magic and found a patron in the forces of chaos (a homebrew wild magic warlock). He originally had a kraken for a patron (UA for what is now the Fathomless patron).

Thinking it might have been the Horn of Valhalla or some such, the party accepted a Horn of Bubbles. They asked if the bubbles would obscure vision, and I said, "not only that, but the bubbles can make a stone floor slick and slippery." The party uses that horn a lot more often than I expected them to.

I’ve come up with a few: Ring of radial - A small ring that when commanded, turns into a tiny radial engine. It has a magically replenishing fuel supply of 1 gram of Avgas per dawn, but the engine also only produces 0.25 horsepower. Also doesn’t come with a propeller. Mantis Arms of Tupiear - A large, pointed spear with a flexible joint in the middle. When used on a flat surface, with the pointy end in the middle of your targeted area, and the flat inky side on the outside, it can draw a perfect circle on it, up to 5 feet in radius. It’s a big compass. The Shopkeep's More Shoe - A magical shoe that takes the form of a large woodlands boot. When a 1 gram ruby is inserted, the player can choose to pull out one gallon of lamp oil in a flask, 50 feet of rope, or an unlit black powder bomb in return. The Shield of the 3008th - A shield that takes the form of a flat-sided piece of furniture each dawn, which is "randomly" chosen by the party. The DM will ask the party "What do you think the shield turned into this morning?" Whatever the first piece of feasibly carried furniture said is, it becomes. Absolutely any piece of existing furniture. A steel table, a glass-front dresser, etc. However, each time the shield is used in combat, a D100 must be rolled. On a natural 100, the shield will summon eight IKEA employees, armed to the teeth with furniture as improvised weapons. They will fight for the wielder of the shield, and will stick around until the end of the current combat, at which point, they return to the elemental plane of unpronounceable furniture. On a natural 1, the wielder of the shield is forcefully taken to the elemental plane of unpronounceable furniture, and must snake their way through a dimly lit IKEA to find a portal back out. It can block up to an attack roll of 15 entirely, automatically taking low AC players who can hold it up a notch. Machete of the Tired Gardener - A machete that can instantaneously cut through any vegetation, be it trees or even moss while it's still on rock. The machete never gets worn down from any use on plant matter. However, it avoids animals or fungus like the plague. It is legitimately incapable of actually bringing harm to anything except plants, and will steer mid-air if combat with it is attempted, aiming straight for the nearest plant life instead. Magic Map of Yuarheer - A map that has an actively tracking indicator for where the map specifically is located as long as its drawn zone is within focus. The drawn area is the size of, you probably guessed, a strip mall. The literal moment the party exits a 1/4 mile zone from the map’s drawn center, the indicator completely vanishes. It also has no clear way to tell which direction in the drawing is supposed to be north. Ring of Feathers Falling - A typo in the creation of the runes caused this ring to do nothing more than display illusionary feathers gliding to the ground. If no clear source of gravitational force is present, the feathers emit in all directions like an unfinished 3D render. Flask of Heterogeneous Mixtures - It’s literally impossible to mix anything together in this flask. Anything you put into it stays separate from anything else put into it. You cannot make potions of any sort within the flask, but chemical reactions occur normally as soon as chemicals leave the flask together. May seem useful to make a grenade, but there is a big problem with that. The chemical reactions occur in real-time as the chemicals leave the flask, and that includes shattering. So adding, say, mentos and diet soda to it would seem like the perfect soda bomb, but it actually just slightly fizzles a bit after the glass breaks. All it really does is make a mess.

Chainmail of Forever Looks Good. Slightly enchanted chainmail, half the normal weight, regular AC, self-healing when damaged; and also it looks really really good 💅🤳😎.

Shackles of Sentient Discipline: When two players in your current session have internal conflict, this item locks on to both of their hands, and makes them hold hands with Each other. This is also a sentient item to which a Nun-like person will appear out of thin air, and scold both players. These shackles will also stay on the players hands, making them hold hands till they resolve their conflict. They also share the same health pool of the highest HP of the highest player shackled, and will both take damage if either of them get hurt. (an IC way of resolving issues lol). Once they resolve their differences, the shackles unlock, and they get their own health pool. The being is also known to attack the shackled players, and give them 1d4 psychic damage with her 3 foot wand if they fail to cooperate.

The Nut Sack. A small bag made to look like (ahem) a certain organ. Reaching inside three times a day will result in it producing a handful of peanuts or walnuts, a d10 worth of water chestnuts or buckeyes, or one coconut. One of our bards uses it to produce improvised ammo for her slingshot. The Sword of Fishslapping: Meant to be a +1 Aquaticbane Longsword in Pathfinder, but the maker botched the spell. Now, whenever it's drawn, a fish jumps out of the nearest source of water and slaps the wielder in the face for 1d4 nonlethal damage. This even works if the nearest source of water is as small as a single drop.

One of my favorites is the Wand of Rod Creation. It has one charge, and creates a Rod of Wand Creation within 5 feet. The Rod of Wand Creation also has one charge, and you'll NEVER guess what it does. Just started video though, so who knows, might be in the list already

Dirt of Chirping. We just got this magic item cause my idiot character handed a clump of dirt to the smartest member of the party, and I asked if the dirt was magical. Whoever carries it sounds like crickets chirping. Attempts to speak in cricket chirping does not, in fact, translate to common. Edit: Another one of my making: Laptop. It's just a regular laptop with a dead battery. It was stolen by a god from a college kid from one universe who couldn't afford another one and given to a wizard from another universe named Reginald who watched it phase into existence. This wizard became convinced it was magical, and after many attempts to get a solid confirmation on what it was, decided to enchant it with the effect that it pings as magical whenever Detect Magic is cast near it.

I watched a dnd useless magic item vid earlier today, and made something as a parody to an item which summons infinite boxes. This led me to think about box forts, which became pillow forts, which leads to... Wand of Infinite Pillows! Wand of Infinite Pillows can summon pillows of any type, and can summon two mattresses of any (normal) size every two weeks.

You have no idea how useful waffle boots are, just keep them clean and use your hands to place them onto anything food or edible: Salt rock - waffle Inedible watermelon rynes - 🧇 Poisonous berries - mini waffles Unprocessed wheat you stole from a field - 🧇 Etc.

We have the "personal bag of holding" if you pick it up you fall under the effect of "hold person" until it's either dispelled or someone else takes it from you, falling under it's effect

Fumbler's Fridge of Fish Will always contain at least one fresh fish when opened. The first time it's opened each day, it flings X+1 fish at whoever opened it, where X equals the number of days it's gone unopened since it was last opened. Each flung fish does 1d4 damage to whoever it hits (1d12 if you're allergic). Any fish successfully caught in your mouth is automatically eaten and restores 1d6 health instead of doing damage. Unless you're allergic, then you take 2d8 damage instead. Maxton's Mackerel Looks absolutely delicious. Eternally fresh and will never rot/decay. This unfortunately means that it's impossible to eat.

The Senseless Axe of Beauty - I know a guy who would love to have that item and use it to buff a bard mid-combat until the bard succeeds on a seduction roll vs the main opponent.

I had a unbreakable always clean mask, no other effect other then that, no use beyond a mask that was always in pristine condition.

Orb of Slope Detection: it rolls UP the slope.

In my DnD , i added an item called the "necklace of reduced arcana output" which would , in fact , reduce the magic output on anyone that wears it. It's sold in common shops in some part of the region my players were in because the magic system i created was based on the fact that magic was obtained from the surroundings and regions with high quantities of magic are very dangerous because if you absorbed too much of this kind of magic (the magic kinda leaks a little even when not using spells so you are always getting some magic from the environement) , you would pretty much become sick or even mutate depending on the nature of the area. The main use of this necklace was to reduce a lot the leaks in your magic so you can adventurer further in areas with high density of magic

That goblin skeleton key seems pretty useful to me. Perfect for if you need to trap an enemy but can’t lock the doors involved because you don’t have the key

Rock of feel good: a rock that slightly glows when the person who holds it feels good, but not enough to illuminate anything(never stated if it ment alignment or just happy)

7:04 Ron on D&Daddies- "Could you please give me your entire stock, please?"

I absolutely love useless magic items. The wand of smiles is an amazing idea. One of my personal favorites is a creation of mine called the Bubble Pipe. It’s a pipe and if you blow into one end then bubbles come out the other. Another not quite as useless item I made is the Wand of Force, which deals no damage but can be used to shove people 10-the number of charges used with no save. Pretty simple but very useful if you’re creative enough.

Vorpal serving fork. It might have only worked on poultry.

One I have not actually tried yet. But would like to. Orb of Thunderous Expulsion: This magic item is the size of a large marble and resembles a polished steel ball. It works 3 times per day. It works by looking at it while it is in your hand. What it does is causes a phantasmal force to spring forth in the image of a demon lord with fire, lightning, and thunder; booming a message in the Abyssal language, a single word, "SUBLEVARE!" (translates to sh!t). After which the person will explosively discharge any constipation they may have. A person who is not constipated will now have diarrhea for the next day.

The blanket of motherly love. +1 hp to whoever is wrapped in it.

Hat of Vermin. It has 3 charges, and summons a rat, bat, or frog, which tries to immediately get away from you when you speak the command word. My player acquired this, and made the command word "LOOK OUT!" And would spawn rats to interrupt awkward interactions, distract npcs, and for general shenanigans.

(Removed things that also appeared on the video. I'm apparently not as creative as I thought) Ring of Anvil-Falling: An old, black rusty ring that when worn, increases the weight of any creature up by 300 pounds whenever they fall from a height of fifteen foot or higher. Additionally, all Strength, Agility and Dexterity rolls used to try to stop, avoid, reduce or lessen the fall will be immediately negated. This ring provides no resistance to fall damage whatsoever. Right Glove of Challenge: A white right-hand glove that, when used to slap any sentient creature, will induce a rage like state directed towards the person in possession of the glove. This effect will last until the affected target successfully deals at least 1 point of damage to the challenger, after which, the effect ends. Chandelier of Paranoia: An ornate brass chandelier with three candles. When lit, it causes a slight sense of dread and paranoia on everyone bathed on the candle's light. Any perception or investigation rolls in presence of the chandelier when is lit will invariably results in "the feeling that one is being watched" with no clear source for the feeling. Canteen of Dehydration: A cursed canteen that produces an endless amount of water when turned upsidedown, one cubic feet an hour. However, despite its apparent usefulness this water it is not safe to drink, as it will vanish from the insides of any living creature within a minute of being ingested, taking with it twice as much liquid as it was drank. The water is harmless if used in any other way. Northern Tribe Harness: A medium sized beast harness, shaped in the form of a large arrowhead. When attached to any load, it will decrease the total weight of the cargo in half. However, until removed, the load can only be moved in a single direction - North. Trying to turn, lift, rotate, push or pull any attached object will simply fail. Removing the harness removes the effect.

Makes me wonder what would happen if the party teleported to a Pottery Barn like store?😆😆😆

OMG the flute of summoning ducks for Choad/Lionel the Bard Barbarian with the Duck Totem would be sooo useful.

So far my absolute favorite magical item I've had is an invisible cigar box, in a home brew campaign. It couldn't really hold much of anything and it's always invisible. That's it. And I love it to the point the DM is scared to ask why I still have it.

Definitely my were-bears Everlast melons and his Everlast Honey water skin.

brian and his little messages at the end are always great

Squeaky boots and billowing cape together for intimidation

Stick of magic detection. It would glow if any magical items were nearby, like the stick itself.

These useless magic item videos are my favorites cause of the pure chaos they can cause Also, the ring of invulnerability could be quite useful in certain situations

3:30 that cape actually seems incredible. Technically, wouldn't that make you immune to fear and the frightened condition? There's probably some other side effects I'm not thinking about either

Early in our game, I gave one of my players (the ice magic sorcerer) an ice cube that doesn't melt. He's been using it to impress townsfolk pretty much everywhere he goes. It used to be (somewhat) useless, but recently he's found a Bloodwell Vial that grants the refreshing of Sorcery Points, but does not yet grant the bonus on spell attacks and damage. There's three slots in the Vial: a square, a circle and a traingle. He's since learned that there's three ancient relics (found at the three highest peaks in the land) that can be used to upgrade his Vial. He's not yet put two and two together..

Watching this gave me a wonderful idea for an npc: A salesman of magical items who himself has a magical glass eye he obtained by accident that lets him see the effect of each magic item just by looking at it. He only has to catch a glimpse at a small part of it. He used that to become a rather successful salesman. However he once tried teaching a rude customer a lesson by selling him a useless item he found. Turns out, that guy was a powerful wizard who cursed him to always just by dumb luck get his hands on magical items but from that day on, each item he tries to sell or use for himself except his eye will instantly slightly change its effect to anything from useful with annoying side effects to the opposite of what you want it to achieve.

Do home-brew items count? The bucket of flying: You stand in this magical bucket and pull up on the handle to gain lift then lean in the direction you want to go. You make a STR check to see if you can even fly, a CON check to see how far you fly, and a balance check to fly faster, all for an item that can only let you travel a few miles a at a time

Im going to run a dnd campaign soon and gave a few ridiculous ideas such as; The Crab Sword - Summons a crab upon being obtained, this crab will follow whoever has the sword and will never leave them alone. This crab is also immortal, and if banished to another plane of existence will reappear next to the swords owner the next morning The Sword Of Swording - Its just two swords duck taped together Wand Wand - Fires a Wand Wand before disintigrating, essentially, infinite Wand Wand's The Dirt Of Immortality - The dirt inside the jar cannot be destroyed by any means. That's it.

I love useless and quirky magic items.

Stone of Gravity Checking. Grab it and then let go. If it falls there is gravity. XD

Ring of Audible Invisibility: Turns the wearer invisible only while they are screaming at the top of their lungs

Bag of unholding. It's inside is smaller than the outside

I had my PCs break into a vault to stop an auction of magic items to bad guys. Some of the magic items were useful, but since it was an auction, I needed a lot of them and didn't want to give too many items away, so a lot of the magic items were just joke items. Among them included: A never-ending fantasy novel (It had drama, danger, romance, basically everything you could want in a novel except a satisfying ending), a belt that turned whoever wore it into a goblin for 24 hours, an amulet that made whoever carried it really, REALLY want to eat cheese, and a self-cleaning box of never-ending cat litter.

The Orb of Slope Detection and Ring of Attunement had me gasping for air I was laughing so hard. Definitely using many of these in my next campaign.