Thanks! Life and what we think is narcissim...are not black and white. For many targets of narcissists, it can feel simpler to deem them as pure evil, however I feel it's better to have a more informed knowledge on the matter and I have tried to put my own narc family as horrible wrongdoers, but over time, as I have healed, i totally agree to what he says.. Today, after much healing, I am comfortable in my own skin and can be a bit more 'understanding' but safely from a distance. As a narc survivor, I know I am better off far away from narcissists...
You are correct. You have made observations and used your common sense. He hates you. He feels threatened by you. He has an inferiority complex that he over-compensates for with a superiority complex and he sees you as competition. As a threat to his delusional god-like complex. He will not let you be in a superior position. This is why he is trying to destroy you. I had a covert narc sister who had zero NPD around our mother who is antisocial PD and is the bigger bully. My sister allowed my mom to be superior to her and therefore my sister wasn’t triggered; but to me, she was a ruthless bully out to destroy me because she refused to hold me in any esteem. It’s in their brain damaged minds or ego part of the brain. Hint, he will never get “cured” for you. They are “cured”. They choose who to allow to be above them or be beliow them. Once that’s done, it’s done. He will always get triggered around you. So I am saving you time as I have finally learned with my sister. I was hoping that she could get, “ cured “ and be normal around me but she can’t.
You are correct. I am an overcoming covert narc by the grace of Jesus Christ. I married a narc because I am not attracted to non-narcs. Both of my parents are covert narcs. Anyways, no need of dating narcs because you will have a mental breakdown. My narc hubby dated multiple women while I was married to him. He brought me lots of jewlry which I refuse to wear because I told him I knew he was stealing jewelry from all his girlfriends.I stopped having sex with him and remained celibate in the marriage. I knew it was possible I would murder him if he brought me a std. Anyways, one day I had nothing to do so I asked my lying hubby to take me over one of his girlfriend's house. He agreed. I was amazed and found it hilarious. I did not let him see me laughing. I said this is the biggest fool I have ever seen in my life. We got to her home she was not there. So I asked him to take me to her job. He did. I was dying with laughter inside. I turned my head the whole time while he drove to her job. When I arrived at the hospital. Most of the staff including docs who knew him went numb.All of a certain they started going on coffee breaks and sitting in the waiting area. They were in shock. I asked him to point out the woman. He said, there she is.😂. I told him to stay there for a minute. I went up to her smiled and extended my hand to greet her. I remarked, "So you are the one screwing my husband. I just came to see you. Would you like my wedding band because I have no interest in it ? Also I have no interest in fighting you so you can unfreeze. " She looked as if she was about to have a heart attack. It took her about 10 minutes to talk seeing I kept being nice. She asked, " Why I stayed with him?" I told her. No need to leave Europe because I was having a pleasant stay. We walked outside and talked some more. I told her I had to leave seeing she had to get back to work. I smiled and told her goodbye as tears started streaming down her face. I called my hubby and told him to bring the car so we could leave. Afterwards, he told me that crazy woman saw me driving and followed me screaming and hollering and asking me why I brought you to the job. I just looked and wanted to know. Well why did you bring me? When I got back to America. I divorced him. Before Christ I hated humans. I had no empathy. One day at a time. Jesus Christ is Lord.
but the point is that they may not be out to hurt you - yet - because their needs are being met without having to hurt you - but if things change to where they can't get their needs met without hurting you - they absolutely will hurt you.
A person doesn’t have to diagnose with the DSM as a full blown narcissist to have traits of narcissism and be dangerous and harmful to others, and it is the individual survivor’s right to express their own experience. many narcissists operate in a way where they taunt one person where others cannot see. Just because they are not qualified to diagnose does not make their experience invalid, and in fact can be better to give a diagnosis than a professional who doesn’t know the Narc, because a narc is UNLIKELY to go in for a diagnosis. Their treatment and narcissistic traits are enough to know that you need to protect yourself from their harm by employing strategies that work with narcissists where everything else doesn’t work.
Please address antisocilly acting communal narcissist in positions of power over senior citizens in assisted living where the dark traited Machiavellian false narrative- bearing. Tyrannical behaving and sadistic female and unsupervized administrator gets away with harming paying and residential clients get screwed with osychologically Via sadistic acts of dominance. She is an abuser and needs to face as extreme legal consequences as possible. I hope you can help me address this, fafter surviving there for 2 years, thank G-d I was able to get out with the help of my older brother. Please address reactive abuse, a misleading term, as is the adjective 'antisocisl' in ASPD. People trying to survive are treated there are subjected to abuse, and her lies are many and she breaks laws and human rights there are removed. For the sake of older people she needs to Be removed from her position; fired and punished retriactively; my GOD! Sorry for the typos.
As someone informed in this area you should know not to come across as invalidating to victims who have been invalidated and bludgeoned for years, and aspects of this video comes across as very invalidating. Please do better. You might have tried to walk the thin middle line but it didn’t work. With abuse especially narcissistic abuse where reality is denied victims, it is even more difficult and it is imperative that when these victims are searching for answers and may fall upon this single video, that they don’t feel invalidated. Professionals telling people to not diagnose is unacceptable. They’re not diagnosing but they know their experience and it is crucial that they express something that has been forcefully covered over by a narcissist for YEARS. Then they’re likely coming with childhood abuse that made them susceptible to the narc, which makes invalidation harder. Don’t tell people they are incorrectly diagnosing narcissists. We KNOW now that narcissism is something that isnt called out ENOUGH and is chronically and harmfully applauded and rewarded, further empowering the narcissist. Professionals telling someone to not diagnose is making that problem worse and putting a shield around narcissism. THAT is wrong. Sure the person may or may not reach the 9 criteria in the DSM, but is DOES NOT MATTER. Their harmful behaviour is everyone’s experience. Being narcissistic whether they are a narcissist or not, is a valid sufficient description, and I am sure you know this. Do better to not further stifle survivors and ongoing victims. Do better.
