She's right. 90% of our moms would never have chosen our dads if they'd had access to dating apps when they were younger. 60% of our dads wouldn't even have kids.
Back in the 90s there was way more slut shaming and therefore a lot more women would not have chad chased on dating apps if they existed. This is a gen-z problem.
This is why you don't choose a partner solely based on looks but on values. Does he share your values and believes? Does he want the same things out of life? Does he put family first etc.. When women spend 20 years chasing chad and career, they normally to end up single and childless.
@@jesuschrist5294 true. I find it extremely difficult to find a first date on a dating app. Ignored for months/years... but every date I've been on (3 dates) has been successful. So it's not really my personality that's the problem is it? It's the fact women are social status orientated; rather than personality orientated.
Jenna, you nailed it! Evolutionary mismatch. As a still single guy who went through pre-dating app era, I had to swing and miss A LOT with women I'd met in class or at work or in the community somehow. In some universe those dates would have turned into long-term relationships, like they did with other couples who met like that and it worked out. Later in life, using dating sites, I've dated, none of them have been long-term. The missing ingredient is meeting someone in real life and developing a friendship that becomes more. You cannot do that on dating apps. Like you and me, even if we lived in the same place and liked some of the same things. It probably wouldn't work out. There is no organic history there. But I wish you well, hope you do find that compliment to your life. If not, be single with hopefully good mental health. That is better than being in a bad relationship. Cheers!
I think women radically overestimate their skill at choosing pictures. In truth, men are just less picky. Try it for yourself; upload some "Bad" pictures of yourself to a dating app and watch the matches roll in. Bonus points if you document it and upload the results to RU-vid.
Basically, a lot of men just use the dynamite fishing method, they click yes to all girls, delegating the choice to women, while those last ones pick up guys upon their feeling at the moment. It's statistics versus mood. A real "dating app" should limit your opportunities and almost choose for you, giving you a restricted panel of real matching possibilities. But hey, dating isn't their businessmodel, it's subscribing.
I think there is some truth in that, but also lost in dating apps is real life encounters that build towards a friendship that can become more. Many long term married couples from the pre-dating app era say they married their best friend and also the woman may say they didn't like their would-be husband at first, may have even said no to a date at first, but then the guy grew on them by being around more, seeing them more and showing they are really interested. Well, you can't do that as a guy on the dating websites. If a woman says no, it is over. No chance to 'win them over.'
You speak truth. Our ancient ancestors may have only interacted with a few hundred people in their entire life. The choices for potential mates were few. A very few.
We don't even have to go that far back. Just the 20th Century generations before Smart phones and all that. They met in real life, in school or at work and often the guy attempted to ask out the girl, sometimes she said no and the guy persisted and finally they girl accepted and it turned into a long term relationship. These days, how would that ever happen? Even in real life. If I meet a woman through work, let's say, and ask her out, if she says no, then what? I can't persist or else I come off as a creep. But that's how some married couples today started out! It started out with the woman saying no to a date or even thinking the guy they would eventually marry was goofy or brash or unattractive in some way.
My grandparents have been together forever, and they probably love each other in some way... but they also definitely hate each other. Also a a guy it's definitely not 55+ matches 😂😂. But yea, dating apps are just not great generally. They make money by keeping you on the app, not helping you find a match.
I have been telling women this for the last few years: Think of that couple you know who is the standard for the perfect relationship. You know, the ones who still hold hands after 50 years. If the woman had that list of nonsense that women on dating apps have, would she have even have met that guy??
In the past relationships were initiated by and dependent on legitimate social interaction. Not the "Social Interaction" that Zuckerberg and friends are serving up. Taking that out of the equation is problematic on every level. That one sentence explains all of the side effect issues that have come about in this new way of doing things incorrectly.
A lot of good points here. The sad truth is, most people are visual creatures and looks do matter. Perhaps it’s not the main trait everyone looks for, but if you are prospecting for a mate (yup I used the word prospecting for a reason), and u know absolutely nothing about the person then most people are gonna place looks at the top of their priorities. And yes, I am aware there are words on dating profiles but in my experience, people upsell themselves like they’d do in a resume and words are hard to believe until u actually talk to them.
Looks start the attraction, but compatible personalities and values determine a short-term from a long-term relationship. Problem with dating apps is what Jenna was saying. Unnatural and too many other options. In theory, dating apps seems really rational. Like, I put up my picture, then I write a profile that says what I like, what I look for in a woman and then I approve of women who I see meet my criteria and then if we get a match that should mean we are already off on a great foot because we both agree we like what we see and we like their basic profile. But somehow, that doesn't work out much of the time. And I think it comes back to the unnatural, too many options, issue. The other part is that so many long-term relationships of previous generations have a story where the guy was rejected at first by the woman he would eventually marry. The guy had to persist. But these days, how do you persist as a guy if a woman swipes no? You can't. You can't win them over with humour, with little nice things you do for them in real life that build up a friendship that turns into more. That is gone out the window.
I feel for the youth, I just hit 30 and never had a dating app. Fortunately I met my fiancé through lifesaving 7 years ago. Let it be, and it will happen.
Evolved? Way I see it, too many people haven't even got round to growing up, still waiting for someone else to come along and fix their lives. Dating apps? They're not helping. (Still gonna like this though, figure that's just a nice thing to do. Thanks JM, enjoy all your stuff.)
@@cChrodinCc Oh really? And of course, you did. But I guess you're way too busy, or important, to share what you think IS "the point" underpinning Jenna's reflection. Or, deep down you know you haven't really got anything to say that's worth hearing, but your need to be the smartass overrrides all else. I don't know. What do you think?
Everyone can identify a good photo... the problem is that women nowadays have access to tens of thousands of men.. so they only look at the top 10% ... the othr 90% can choose all the good photos they want... they will have very few matchs and probably will not be answered on the apps
A girl who talks about Turing test, evolution... I'm in love😍 That aside, 100% agree, no dna "smells" your body couldn't tell how far or closely related u are, it determines true attraction. Ever wondered why two strangers from other ends of the earth who came together in the middle of nowhere, can't even communicate through language, could spend time together laughing like mad, fall in love and know how to find each other at odd times and places just because they happen to be in close proximity at one time? Follow your receptors, it starts slow about a couple of hours but it'll always guide you in the blind (and more powerful than any apps)😊
Problem is modern humans live our lives through a screen; men cannot demonstrate the qualities women are attracted to, strength, confidence, ability and personality.
Barely any of us would be alive today if Tinder was a thing when our parents were around. I don't know who dating apps are for. I'm surprised dudes are even still on dating apps, if you're like 6 ft 4, then sure... go nuts, but any dude in that category is most likely running an entire roster of girls.
We're not even evolved to be dating strangers at all. We're supposed to be dating people that we've already known for years. People we grew up with together in our tribe. The whole concept of dating strangers is an evolutionary mismatch.
"When you're married you see them in person mostly, you don't really see pictures of them all the time" I'm married and this is complete ignorance. People, do NOT settle on partner with zero sense of framing like I did.
