First Time Hearing To Be A Man MEGA REMIX by Dax | Su!cide Survivor Reacts 

💖I am so grateful that we are able to have open dialogue about our mental health journeys and learn from each other. No matter where you are in your journey, you have a safe place here to share your struggles and accomplishments without judgment. This is how we shatter the mental health stigma.💖 Learn the EXACT steps I took in getting my depression and BPD in check, overcoming addiction and self harm and going from ready to end it all to true healing. amandawebsterhealth.com/happiness-boost

This song hits me so hard right now, been with my wife for 15 years providing for her without fail. Recently had to have my legs amputated below the knee and unable to work. She decided that she wants to separate and divorce because I can no longer give her the lifestyle she wants.

The singer that did the "Jesus wept so brother, you can too" is a gentleman named Ben Becker

You are making a big difference Amanda. You are loved more than you know. Your best days are just ahead! Blessings!

This is the first time I'd ever listened to a reaction this long. Thank you Amanda for the reaction but more importantly for the conversation. Love it...

Really loved your closing statements as well. You are a strong voice on youtube and I appreciate everything you do.

I honestly love this version more than the original, it's so good 16:07 that's my favorite verse, I've said that same thing for years "most men are halfway dead inside" myself included

POWERFUL! It is frustrating and exhausting to feel like you are the only true parent that really tries to raise my kids in a way that they deserve! "Jesus wept and so can you!" I have zero issues crying (getting rid of the society stigma). As the boys and I repair our hearts, that involves strengthening our faith and that a real man CAN cry too as we do that, this is one of the things that I try to teach them and I am praying constantly that those lessons is one they keep doing when they go back to their mother!

I was brought up in old school values and to this day I think the word I say the most is I'm ok

YEEEEES I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR YOUR REACTION TO THIS

Great reaction. To this song. Like your thought process. Enjoyed it. Thank you.

I'm glad you finally did this. I may have been one of the people who requested it. Nice intro btw.

This old vet pulled up a chair for your reaction. I have watched your reactions going before your FFDP wrong side of heaven reaction..this song ( like FFDP) being in an old divorced vet with TBI and PTSD, existing under a VA program for homeless vets, this song always hits hard and personal to me. As for masculinity and crying? I went to the Army 1st Inf. a week after 17 and had done almost 4 years before i was old enough to drink. Then did four years with the Coast Guard, spent almost 20 years with DOD contractors. I have lost more tears in the darkness of my old world than I would ever want to count. The battle within.

I think it's terrible if you were getting aggressive comments about your parenting decision regarding your son. All I'll say is that it is important to teach boys that there are unsafe spaces to be open with their emotions.

If you’re not getting sick of the song, check out the official remix with country music star Darius Rucker. And the sequel to this song, “A Real Man”

Atlus and Dax are always fire together! They have helped me a lot with my mental health lately.

Love your reaction keep ip the good work

Just found your channel and want to say thank you for trying to break this stigma.. living like this almost killed me but thanks to women like you it’s become easier to let go off all the years of bottled up emotions. Appreciate you more than you will ever know

18:53 just in case you didn't notice, when dax says the first line of the chorus, "I can't hide myself," she says, "Please don't hide yourself"

There was a feminist who was happy, loved and desired with many friends, both male and female who decided to "be a man" to show that it's not true that men have a rough life. She became a he and was attacked, put down, unable to have a conversation with females, men treated her like men do each other and on and on... She made a video of how horrible it was and committed suicide.

Really appreciate it,been single for about 8 yrs and been through some bad ish.. Hopefully one day I'll be happy

I'm ok. The biggest Lie I tell people on a daily basis

Thank you for understanding 👍love it.

This woman is so effin dope, God bless this channel 💛

The second gentleman that you were asking who he was because you loved his voice is Ben Becker

You just got yourself a new sub.. Mental health issue is a crisis.. Ill follow up on ur vids.. :)

love your thoughts on co-communication in relationships and how there is a responsibility on both partners to both express their needs and meet the needs of their partner. Well said

Thank you for reacting to this video. I commented on the last one and I hope that you did not feel attacked because that was never my intent. Now I would like to address some of your comments. The first one is that you said not all women, perhaps you have said not all men in one of your other videos, there are enough women who make men feel less that the not all women comment does not sit right. When you ask what are we protecting women from? Poverty, homelessness, negative emotions. Now I agree that women can go to work and do any job that men do. I understand that you don't need a man in your life. This reaction reduces a man's usefulness in his mind. And because we already don't feel needed there is no point in living. Lastly without realizing it a lot of conversations get turned against men when we try to express how we feel. Comments like that is not true and you should not feel or believe the way you do really damages trust. I appreciate you and am grateful that you are willing to give this space for discourse.

Please don't misunderstand, I know you are a good person and are working to help and I believe you do and I appreciate it, I do think there's a little bit of the old trope where someone tells a depressive person, "just don't be sad." It's not right and I certainly work to find safe spaces and find ways to express myself but I do have to live in this world and, in this world, it is the way it is. I hope it will change. I am working to change it for my son. You're working to to see it change. And I believe it will. But behaving as though the world isn't what it is isn't really viable either.

1000 % truth,,,even as survivors we are attacked,grouped into the same group as abusers. we cant win, cant open in support groups lest we are attacked, attacked if we stay silent.

Thank you Amanda.

There's something I need to point out here and I hope it helps contribute to your peace of mind. Whenever there is a cultural touchstone like this where people gather to share their pain, there are always some people who are less graceful about it and can lash out. That's why you see aggressive comments about how you can't understand, or you contribute to the problem, or whatever it may be. I can tell you have a caring soul. You are not the person this lashing out is meant for, you are a target of convenience. Please know that their anger comes from their pain, not from what you are doing. Anyone should be able to read your intentions and see that you mean well here.

Great and beautiful song and reaction.

I have no social life. Chilling at home with my demons. I get that lies so much so understand that line. Probably one of the best minds in the whole thing

So happy to see you do this one... also a real man by dax. ❤❤❤ BTW. You my mom and my psychiatrist are the only female I have ever opened up to. I trust you unconditionally. I know you are a safe place and no judgements. Thank you

The young lady at the end of the song got to my soul and frankly made me cry! My second ex told me that I was "being selfish" if I started off our nightly discussions about how our days went rather than letting her lead off (wasn't always me "going first"). That hurt something fierce and that portion of the song is a reminder that I should not have to feel like that. 😭😭😭

I can tell you - as a man who spent over 2 decades in the military, and therefore spent over 2 decades mentoring young men (and some young women) - these were tough red-meat eating infantryman - and they were constantly getting the dual message of "open up and communicate and share how you feel" - to then get treated HORRIBLY by the women they dated when they did so. It was like this visceral switch got flipped in the gal's head that he was no longer worthy of respect or desire and often signaled they were easy to manipulate by these gals. I mean - think about it - the gals are telling them to open up, to communicate, to share their fears and concerns and their bad memories from deployment - to have those **PRIVATE** thoughts and fears shared with gal pals or thrown in their faces when the gal was angry with them. It was devastating. You want to know where "bad boys" come from - a lot of times from exactly that treatment. EDITED TO ADD - to *gently* respond to your well meaning assertion of "the hasty generalization fallacy" 1) If so many men are sharing the exact same stories - instead of thinking they are falling under that fallacy, maybe the problem is a widespread and common scenario these men are encountering? 2) These men who came to my unit came out of a school system that TAUGHT that a "hasty generalization fallacy" towards THEM was perfectly acceptable. In other words they saw, by example, over and over, that "men" were x, y, and z - and whenever they spoke up they got snark, derision, shaming language, and were told to "educate themselves." The feminist ideology as to men is deeply marinated into a lot of teachers brains. How do I know this? Because I got young men from all around the country, from different races and socio-economic backgrounds who all told the same story. I hope I have added to this discussion.

I think all of the artists are in the description of the original video, but I only knew Atlus (first guy) and Phix (blonde guy with tattoos) going into this for the first time. They've both worked with Dax a number of times.

Thank you! ❤

This so hard not tear up listening

Thank you for your reaction for this video. Your response is validation of what most men including myself longs to hear. Most females say that a male is weak if he shows emotion and it puts us in a dark place so thank you for your thoughts on this.

Thank you for ur beautiful words, I appreciate u....Us men get tired..

Well done 👍

Love your reaction ❤. I had a very different takeaway from the song. It seems to me there're ask people to recognize the work/sacrifices men make to provid for everyone and asking for a little help in providing so they can do a little self care.

I was the first guy when everything hit the fan and when I broke and got my TBI from the military I broke and never put myself back together and yeah I obviously had a hand in pushing everyone away but no one actually cared to just ask what was going on they all just left.

The second version of this song is called "real man" by dax . Well maybe a part 2

Here's a truth most men won't admit till it's past the breaking point, if a man tells you he's fine Hug him, he needs it and is breaking down inside

The hard part is as a husband, father, and to be a head of our home, is that weakness, uncertainty or fear will perpetuate through the family. I want to protect them from those feelings to the best extent possible. My wife and I are very much in lock step with each other, and she is my side-by-side forever love. She is much more nurturing and teaching our 4 daughters that skill. What I don't want them to do is fear how they are going to be provided for in the many ways of providing. Not just monetarily, but that is a big part. For men in the workplace, if you are not taking the bull by the horns, you won't get promoted. You will be stepped over. When you do take on a project to lead, if you are expressing uncertainty, your coworkers won't follow you and your project may just likely fail. Might cost you your job. With gas prices, insurance cost and interest rates... it's a lot on the shoulders. Add to that a faltering society that decides rioting, looting, mugging, home invasions and other crimes are ok... then that's the protector aspect. Plus add the lack of time to just "get away from it all", no time to fill that glass you were speaking of. My get-away is either hiking, hunting, or sometimes just going near the airport and guessing where that plane may be going.. (was in the Air Force for 13 years and did multiple tours) I fixed planes and have a love of aviation. No time now. I agree with you on the vast majority of your points. It's putting that balance into action that trips me up.

I understand where these men are coming from because I used to feel lots of these emotions, but fortunately I no longer succumb to social 'experiments' easily. Social media does a smart job at pitting everyone against each other. I've worked hard for several years to not be offended by anything. Not let certain things affect me. I guess mainly it started because I didn't want anyone having control over me. I listened to a comedian making a joke about somebody getting offended over something and it stuck. One of the worst things to me is not having control. So drugs/drinking/smoking/pills etc., just like being offended, is a nono for me. It helps you be able to think more clearly and be more reasonable among other things. I'm glad you're bringing up this topic, it needs to be shared and you have a very eloquent way of presenting your thoughts and ideas. I'm very grateful for you and all you do to strive to help this community. And all people really. I don't have any form of mental health as far as I'm aware, but many in my family do. I've been able to help some even from listening to you and people like you. So again, thank you. Much love and appreciation to you and this community. And to the haters, my father always allowed us to share our feelings and cry when we needed to. Unless out of a joke, he never told us to man up or stop crying. I have my head on very straight, I've worked in the medical field 'aware' of what goes on in it and have been trying to fight the bad since waking up to so many terrible things that are being done. There is strength in standing up for what's right, and not just following the mob because it's the easier route.

when she sings the ' IM sorry Part.'... .I flippin loose it.......

Now react to Dear alcohol by Dax Mega Remix 🙏🙏

Sometimes You’re The Hammer Sometimes Your The Nail

And a man that had stage four cancer and was going to six months of chemotherapy I felt that it was still my job to go out and work provide for the household no matter how I was physically feeling how sick I felt I felt I had to live up to the stereotypes that you’re a man go to work bring the money home and support the familyno matter what you’re going through but now I am a cancer survivor

Welp.... I have a new favorite song. This song defiantly accurately depicts what it's like to be a man. I'm not a very big fan of diversity, but from a visual story telling perspective I'm glad they added diversity, it helps to express how this experience isn't one race or the other, it's universal to all men of all races. Also, sadly, women like you are the minority. We in this rabbit hole think it might be tied to evolution from back in the hunter-gatherer days where if a man always talked about his feelings all the time instead of hunting then they would literally not bring home the bacon. On the glimmer of hope side, I suppose as the generations go there could/would be more women like you. Men are starving for women like you too. So much so you can predict with 100% accuracy what anime characters will be the most popular or called "Wifus" by if they don't judge a man and listen to his feelings or problems without being turned off, abandoning him or getting grossed out. Needless to say: We Love You! 🤗💖

Also, to address what you were saying about how it was mostly women you got those responses from. It's really.... more difficult for an average guy to find a woman who thinks as you do than you might think. I showed this song to my sister a couple of weeks ago, and you know what she told me? She told me I don't understand how hard women have it. I don't understand that mindset, though. Can I not advocate for men's issues while also advocating for women's issues? Why does it have to be one or he other? Just because I stand up for men's issues doesn't mean I'm AGAINST women's issues! The thing is, there are PLENTY of people advocating for women, but barely anybody actually doing the same for men. I will ALWAYS stand by women against the issues that face them. But I'd also like it if they would, in return, stand with ME as well. There are lots of awful men in the world, it's true. There are also plenty of awful women. But, for instance, I don't use my experience with my most recent ex who was INCREDIBLY emotionally, financially, and psychologically abusive to me to justify hatred of ALL women, because that's stupid.

Once again, no matter what, it’s a man’s fault for being treated poorly. It’s his dating pool. It’s the type of women he goes after. He sees other men with the same experience and assumes that all women are the same. “It’s not my gender; it’s your perception of women. It’s really your fault.” Imagine telling a woman who thinks all men are abusive cheaters that it's just her choices in men, or that seeing other women comment that a man beat them and cheated on them is making her generalize. You'd get destroyed for "victim blaming." No matter what, being abused is always our fault as a man. Your intro is exactly why men don’t talk about things. We do, and we get blamed for it.

😢 I wish we could all have ....doesn't matter

I appreciate your take! Remember the cliche, “hurt people, hurt people”. Some of the “men” who might have dumped on you and nitpicked your view have probably been hurt too many times. It absolutely doesn’t justify it, it more shows how screwed up our society has made a lot of men feel. Society has made it a competition between men and women and in certain areas it’s worse than others. We’re not meant to compete we’re meant to complement. In my opinion men are crying out for complementary relationship with women without being accused of holding down the ones they love and loving them the way their instincts curated by previous generations taught them but also improving them. ❤

It's important to recognize that men don't have near freedom, support, or space that women have to deal with their heard ships and pain. It's unfortunate but we can change that but we have to recognize how far behind men are socially with no add programs

this being just my own opinion, I think of the women I have seen react to both to be a man videos, getting backlash or anger, as I think for men, not all of course but for maybe many, when things are botteled or surpressed for along time, the build up for that posion, is anger rage etc, its why you hear stories or men going to like some mens retreat and just raging, about things, when they feel safe and free to do that, as you can't unleash all that bottled up posion at your loved ones, as trypically that will cause them to no longer be your loved ones. I have seen many a time when men haved tried to talk, and it destroyed things, or maybe it helped but I think many men weigh that risk, and for some they feel its just safer and easier to die by inches then risk just jumping off the cliff. My opnion of course doesn't apply to all men, but just my thoughts.

Yes its very hard to describe the struggles men go threw,i got locked up for wrong friends.lost my job and couldnt work on mines untill my case was solved,i have wife and 3 daughters.i need to provide,so i had to make plan to get going.hustling .but the more i made money my wife just wanted bigger house,better car just upgrade more and more even though she sees me only working!but men are to proud to say enough is enough!things build up and build up.and i chose my wife and kids above my family,so no one to talk to or to confide in!!,we feel dead inside!!

It's cause men don't get advocated for. I opened up to my wife and I'll never do it again. It caused nothing but problems, I don't know if I can get past what she did to me with my own grief.

Most of us men cry, we just wont let you see it out of fear.

18:08 sadly you and your friends are unicorns, the amount of women I’ve known and spoken to at my job or out in public shame men who open up because it’s seen as weak or that he’s not a man, it’s men who often stand up for the guys

I think you'd like Just Like Nothing, Before We Say Goodbye or Until Then by Prozak or A Real Man by Dax I'd love to see a reaction to one of them.

Hey Amanda i just want to say that i have removed/Deleted negative people from life because i plan on focusing on myself and not my kindness to others. I know it sounds wrong, but is it a good idea to do? 🤔😔❤️❤️

Hey Amanda I normally don't comment but could you check out the song devil by phix it has a lot to do with mental health

Do yourself a favor and check all these artists out. The 2nd one is Ben Becker and the gentleman with the beard is Brutha Rick they’re all awesome!

Tom Macdonald just dropped a new music video - Heroes.

What men are trying to get everyone to understand is that the man up trope was started by women, and believe it or not still remains. We have been told to be emotional, but the minute we are it is always weaponized against us. Society wants men to be work horses and nothing more. However it does not give anyone an excuse to be disrespectful to you. We just want everyone to understand that we want to be open, but every single time we are, we're treated like trash, then cheated on, or left.

I am a man who can say the I have tried to comet Su!cide because of woman and bottling up all my emotions, and now I avoid woman and focusing on my self.

With all due respect, there is another angle. Men will test the waters with being open. If any of that is used against him in an argument, he will never open up again. This is because betrayal can only be handled 2 ways, and neither are really good. Most will just withdraw. Others turn to violence. Ladies, if you want your man to open up to you, and stay that way, do not betray that trust when he tries to open up. There is no way to take it back once it's been done.

@mentalAmanda..... any parent, can think they can think the best for their child, then you have those who dont like those thoughts.... its what us parents have to deal with now a days

You should react to the dear alcohol mega remix!

Leave a Light On from Papa Roach please

This is hard why im not a open book and for me life stink and ,i dont trust anyone

I have to admit I lost a bit of confidence in you due to your opening. We didn't say it was all women. We answered a question that you asked. I think most of us would appreciate you listening to what we did say rather than deflecting. Hope this helps.

Your amazing love everything you do plz react to fallen angel 2

I think in alot of cases women don't mean to make guys feel the way they do but more so don't understand thar their reactions arnt what men want. In general, or maybe just for me personally, if I'm struggling I don't want my wife to feel sad reacting like " I'm so sorry I feel bad for you." We dont want to cry together, Their sadness only brings more stress so we close those things off and don't share our hardships. I think men need reassurance, a response more along the lines of. That's a hard situation but I belive in you and know you're able thank you so much for what you do." I think women react to things the way they would want to be comforted and not necessarily the way a man wants to be reassured.

Try some music by YES one of the greatest progressive rock groups of all time. You haven't reacted to them at all. Some good ones include "Roundabout", "Close to the Edge", "The Gates of Delirium". "Awaken", "Turn of the Century"... Loads of good ones. I'll subscribe if you do a YES song and so will many other YES fans.

Once you share your feelings as a man, there's no going back. It will be used against you. Especially by women you're interested in. Society wants men to open up, but when we do we're not "the right kind of person" for them. I had a relationship ended, because I was honest and told her, that I had suffered from depression for over tean years and tried to take my life. I haven't heard from her since. Opening up for men seems fine on paper and social media, but in reality, you're still considered a weak link by most.

What exactly does an emotional stable men is? Is it a men that can suppress their emotions or is it a men that can express their emotions without any consciousness? What exactly is the women's perspective of it?

Great reaction, if you are interested in learning more about what the modern man is facing there is a great video where Dr. K from HeathyGamerGG was on the podcast The Diary of a CEO. I'd recommend giving it a watch even if you don't react because it will give you an idea of what is bombarding young men so you can use that knowledge in raising your son.

Love ya. Beautiful lady.

Do the song r**e me by nirvana next. the reason why I didn’t put the APN was because I didn’t want it to get flagged and taken down and me getting my account suspended for even saying the R word. But if you’re able to do the song great, if not then let me know and I’ll gladly understand as well

I could do a reaction to you from beginning to end. Not to correct or demean. But to see another side. But this is not the time nor place and truthfully I ain’t ready not were I’m at. But it’s… it’s the life I I got.

it's not wrong for wanting to help men, give safe spaces, try to understand etc, but the most important thing I think men cannot quite explain to women is, the best thing (mostly) women can do to help us, is LEAVE US ALONE. I don't mean that in a nasty way or unappreciative way. Obviously some things should only be between partners or spouses, those things are evident to most people, but we are simple creatures. The main thing men need to help with depression or mental health etc, IS OTHER MEN. For the most part, it is NOT women. The main issue with the modern day is that men's spaces, clubs, groups etc have been eroded by women and feminism on the grounds of being "toxic" and "misogynistic" or whatever lie they want to tell. They do know not, or do not care, just how important these male only spaces are to men. I'm not trying to diminish the struggles of women, they have their own issues men will never understand, but most women will NEVER know what it is to be TRULY alone. Nobody comes to help us, nobody checks how we are, nobody cares how we are doing. Women used to see mens only groups, clubs, pubs, gyms, YMCA, boy scouts etc etc etc, and just saw the "boys club", a place they were excluded from, and they HATED it. They didn't see or care about the good those places did for men. A place for men to talk to others, to express emotions that only other men will understand. A place for boys to be mentored and learn skills, about life and relationships and fatherhood etc. The eradiation of these mens spaces has done untold damage to western society and the entire male species as a whole.

Defy You from The Offprings

yeah, here's the thing, we don't say all women, but the majority of women say all men. women say they want men to be emotional until they get it, and most often weaponize their feelings against them. as for divorce, 80 percent of women initiate divorce, not because of infidelity or abuse, they are simply " unhappy", men don't leave but end up staying even when unhappy. but they are considered deadbeats if they do leave

React to the megamix❤❤

Well Amanda I've never been in a relationship in my life so i can't say anything about it 😊😅 s Ryan Barron sometimes i wish I could Believe in love so I could see what it feels like to have someone

I think you are beautiful with a big heart keep it up

You should watch suicide by Ren

Giving men a safe space in your environment, that ain't it sweetheart, if they can't

I have been bottling my emotions up for 10 years i have been taught crying or talking about ir emotions is not ok

I'm not justifying it as OK because its not, but I think a lot of the attacks come from people who have heard what youve said 100 times before and its always been used against them. I know thats been the case for me. Now I know you specifically are being genuine and logically I grasp that but my gut emotional immediate response is "Yeah you SAY that but its bullshit". Much like if a woman is hit enough she flinches when you try to give her a hug the same thing happens to men who have had their vulnerability pissed on and shoved back in their face over and over - its instinctual defense. I dont date, I tell people its because Im done and Im happy alone but the reality is I'm not but I cannot trust women anymore. I just can't and thats not the woman's fault she may be completely honest, trustworthy and innocent but I am too broken for any form of healthy relationship and seeing as Im a straight man that means being alone. When a woman is nice to me my default setting is "Get out of here NOW this is a trap". I have my cats instead.

Please site the statistics that you refer to

I feel as if I owe you an apology, and I will certain take that opportunity. You mentioned in this reaction that you received a lot of "negative" comments following the reaction of the other version of this song. I re-read the comment that I made and realized that I can see how a person would view this negatively. This was not my intent, nor will I take an opportunity here to "justify" what I really meant. I sincerely apologize if my comment was one of those that lent any negativity towards you or yours. I will be more careful, here and everywhere else. I recognize I cannot take back, nor would I take back, anything on the internet. How instead a positive story regarding the efforts of people, like yourself, that have chosen this particular hill to stand on. A celebration of efforts if you will. About 20 years ago, my family after traveling back to our hometown stopped in a fast food joint to get something to eat. It was very late, we were very tired. We ordered at the counter and went to grab a booth. On my way to the booth I saw an old man, maybe 80, full WWII uniform, sitting by himself. He looked upset. I told my people "do what you gotta do, I can walk home from here if the kids (3 and 1) get too impatient". I walked up the old man and asked him if I can get anything for him. He said no, so I asked him if I can take his trash for him. I was expecting a "yes" or a "no". This man answered with "Have you ever seen anybody just blow up?" I thought oh crap, this is gonna take a minute, maybe two. I will forego all of the details, but in the next hour and a half, I learned that he got married at home, then in short order went to a ship in Pearl Harbor (yup, that one), somehow lived through that and went on to, ummm, "work" in the Pacific. This man detailed so many things that I had hoped I would never even have to visualize. I just listened. He had never told this to anybody, not his wife, not friends, not anybody, he stated. I asked him why tell me now? He said he had to tell somebody so there was witness to his crimes. I asked him what crimes he was referring to. He said that when he got back home, he and his wife never had children because he could never invite people into a world where people were capable of doing the kinds of things to each other he had witnessed. I asked if that was his crime. He said that it was. His only family, his wife, had already departed. He asked what he should tell his maker when he got there? I told him, "When you get there, you square up, feet together at a 45, thumbs by your pants seams, and you look straight ahead and you tell him the truth sir. I don't know myself how it works there, but I'm guessing it's like a Marshall here, and you'll have one shot at it. The good news is that you'll finally get the truth in return". I asked him if there was anything I could do for him here in the meantime. His was was no, he was ready. I got his name, and about two weeks later, went to his funeral. I go every year to his grave. So here's the thing; I think about this all the time. Following our conversation, I aspired to be just like him, to carry my burdens, no matter what, then die with them. Over time, I began to no longer aspire for this, but to aspire to be that strong instead. Because of people like you Mrs. Amanda and the work that you do (the hill you stand on), this hill has gotten a lot smaller over time. People are changing their views. Their attitudes toward gender roles, gender based expectations, the like, are changing. Generations like mine will be gone soon enough, and with it, our fallacies too will erode. I believe this story, and from it a comparison of then vs. now, warrants some celebration, but highlights the work left to be done. I wish you strength, good will, and clarity.

Stoicism is hardwired into our caveman brain, it goes back to the beginning of time, men had no use for being emotional, you can't let emotion run when a sabertooth tiger is coming in the cave, you can't be emotional when going out for weeks long hunts in the middle of winter, emotions were a danger to early man, he had to be cold and calculated, and it was all for the family, the main purpose of all life on this planet is to reproduce, the species can survive with 100 women and only 1 lucky man, because you can have around 100 children a year, but if there were 100 men and only 1 woman, the species is doomed because you cannot repopulate at that rate, so therefore in an evolutionary sense, women are more important because they birth the children that keep our species going, but they are also the only ones able to feed a baby, so if the woman gets hurt, the baby dies, so the man, since the beginning of time, has had to protect women and be willing to give their lives so she and the baby can survive, so his genes are passed on and the species can survive, even just 150-200 years ago, life was very difficult, there were bandits, no modern medicine, no birth control, no prenatal care, no abortion, no epidural or anything like that, untamed wilderness, no grocery stores ect, so only up until fairly recently in human history has it become safe enough for men to not NEED to protect women that way for the survival of our species, we still have a primitive side of our brain that thinks like a caveman, men and women, it's deep in our subconscious mind, hardwired from hundreds of thousand of years of passed down experiences, so we don't even notice it working, problem is, men no longer get the acknowledgement and respect for what they do like they once did, and that is the currency men are looking for, not pitty, the world still needs strong men who don't let emotion cloud their judgement, because let's face it, there is more than likelly always going to be bad people trying to do bad things, and we need strong men to stand against them, I'm sure I missed some things, but I think I got the main idea across

She really just said, "Not all women." 😦