Solid. Just solid. My struggle comes when their rudeness, selfishness and/or self centeredness have a direct negative impact on my job/tasks, causing me extra work and using time I had dedicated to other things.
This is typically when I have extreme bursts of anger...how are you handling this? I feel as though, when people do this, they are telling me that their time is more precious than mine...instead of them just helping out in a way that is beneficial to all, including themselves.
@@ssilva7371 honestly I follow the other lessons. I remember anger is a reaction and I can choose another way. I acknowledge the frustration and remind myself the other rude person is not perfect either. Don’t get me wrong, I fail as many times as I succeed, but it gets easier the more I do it.
@@ssilva7371 remind yourself daily that "angry outbursts" are NOT acceptable behavior (and frankly, is typically worse than rude behavior) as a starting point. Then slow, deep belly breathing, and follow the stoics!! Prost!
My situation might be different but I’m a server at a restaurant and the way I “win” these interactions is by taking control and realizing my power in the situation. I am in complete control of their experience at the restaurant and so I try to give the best service I can and win by being great. If they take it too far and escalate then I remain calm and deal with them with simple yes or no questions that typically make them, or the other people at the table, realize they’re being ridiculous
@@ryanferguson9249 many things are outside our control. Forcing people to respect us is one of them. Respect that is not freely given means nothing. "Force" and "respect" don't even belong in the same sentence. Of course, some people use "fear" interchangeably with "respect". It is definitely possible to force someone to fear you, but it's a hollow victory.
On the zooming out part, I always rewatch Carl Sagans' pale blue dot speech on RU-vid. It really helps you see how tiny and insignificant all of your problems really are.
Carl Sagan, "billions & billions", get over it. Space as Sagan would have you believe, is fake AF. You're sitting perfectly still but believe you live on a spinning ball soaring through the vastness of space, it ain't happening. Time to wake TF up, hopefully you haven't had your third jab, yet.
I use something similar when practicing mindfulness; I’ll ask myself questions like “what is the body feeling?” Or “what is the mind thinking?” I see these sensations outside of myself, as we are not our thoughts or emotions. This creates psychological distance, and I’m able to see myself as a kind of machine that can be tinkered and toyed with. Very similar benefits of detachment can be found when observing others I find. I’ll ask myself “what is going on with this human?” This way I observe them like a scientist studying a specimen under a microscope. I see them simply as an aspect of nature, like a rock.
On a universal scale, I agree. But on an individual scale, we still have to deal with them if we are to have any quality of life so in this regard, the pale blue dot perspective becomes academic. In my opinion anyways.
Renfri: People call you a monster Geralt of Rivia: A mutant Renfri: What if they come after you? Attack you? Geralt of Rivia: They have. Renfri: Why not kill them? Geralt of Rivia: Because then, I am what they say I am.
A waiter was really rude today during a celebratory dinner and it got to me but after watching this I feel better and know my approach to life is in tact and he probably is going through something
Thank you! I just recently found your short videos on Instagram and RU-vid! I'm really enjoying the uploads and the pearls of wisdom you share! Just by listening and thinking about the things you mention has really helped me! Thank you!
Hey youre puttin up good work with some good advice. I agree with most stoicism quotes. Also appreciate you and your heart in these videos. I hope the best for you man. Thank you
the point on revenge…my grandma used to tell me this all the time while i was a angry child at times. i never understood why she said it was bad until i got older. how can you consider yourself a “good person” or deem them a “bad person” if youre willing to do something just as bad or maybe worse than they did?
Thank you for your powerful lessons. As I apply them I observe other people & am learning how to change the way I think. Thank you for helping me to be stronger & wiser 🌹🦋🏆
Great advice for anyone who works in the healthcare industry… Every RN, that takes care of 5-6 patients for 12 hours, will be able to live a better life!
Marcus Aurelius also said that it is a good thing to really listen to the other person ( no matter how difficult they are) it will do two things, the other person will feel better having been taken seriously and his voice voice heard, and, no matter how wrong or ridiculous they are you will learn how they come to that conclusion or opinion, this is a great advantage in later meetings......
Love your video’s! I didn’t know much about stoicism, but thanks to you I’ve become quite enthousiastic about it. It’s empowering! Looking forward to see more of your video’s!
@@pippipster6767 Aurelius was probably surrounded by so called "no-good" people and these were his psychological techniques that he used to maintain his composure and not hate anyone.
@@pippipster6767 Marcus always has people like that around him. You’re still missing the point. You acknowledge that and they keep continuing, that’s when you cut them off etc.
Wow! Thank you so much for this post I have been for years trying to explain the basic principles of Christianity to my wife on how they apply to us and lo and behold you come up with this earlier LOL
I've been loving your videos and sharing them like crazy. I'm a very sensitive been conscientious and compassionate person. And I believe in doing what seems to be very clearly, the right thing. What would you say about those who trash the planet? They are affecting us. And what of those who oppress others, including animals? Thank you.
I agree with most of this. *HOWEVER* Giving someone the “benefit of a doubt” is a set-up for disaster if they happen to be a narcissist. If you have doubts, pay attention-there’s a reason *WHY* you have doubts. Never second guess your gut level instincts, red flags, or your intuition! It’s time to exercise caution, sidestep the person, or whatever option works best for you under the circumstances.
This is very true for me. Growing up overweight I took a lot of verbal abuse. I think that is one of the reasons why I'm able to see past the insults and unreasonableness of people I meet at work and in social situations. I'm also of an age where I don't need to "prove" that I am a man. Mostly it doesn't matter unless I make it matter. Many of my former adversaries have come to realize that I am only looking out for their best interest and are more willing to work with me. However; I do wonder if I am doing the right thing sometimes. It appears that I let people walk all over me and my friends and coworkers come to my defense or suggest that I should stand up for myself.
Thanks man. I had one of the worst housecalls about an hour ago. I ended up just walking out on them. I tried to help, but they let their kid run around me while I was working, even after telling them I cant have that and need space, and every single thing that came out of the only adult there's mouth was condescending and venomous. I tried so hard to get their machine running only to be treated like dogshit for almost 2 fucking hours. If I get fired for it, so be it. But seriously, thank you. This is helping me at least not think about them anymore.
No joke i took the 3rd one literally. Started lifting weights nearly everyday and got a more labor intensive job. I bumped into the guy that screwed me over and made me homeless and he was afraid of me. Lol
