Half in the Bag: Cocaine Bear, Knock at the Cabin, and The Whale 

Lol.. perfect

It's worth trying to use the light in the scene when you can. But Tarantino famously lights his films like a stage play. Spotlights out of nowhere. Because it's more important for a shot to look right for the tone of the scene, than for it to be "realistic". At least in fiction.

@@KevinJDildonik Which is a braindead take because movies should be immersive

Elijah Wood said that, not Sean Austin.

I have to say that the lighting during the whole Minas Morgul and Shelob sequence has always bothered me, it was way too bright and broke the immersion, especially in the sequence where Frodo shows the vial of Galadriel: there's supposed to be a massive constrast between the absolute darkness of the cave and the holy light of the vial. They could have done it way better.

I squeeze gats

Somebody had to say it.

I like your cyberpunk videos, kudos 👏

I never would've thought to see you in these parts! A surprise to be sure, but a welcome one! I love both Red Letter Media, and you Indigo Gaming lol. ❤

i never expected to see the guy who rage quit wayward realms in a redlettermedia comment section

its a bad movie, even judged as a comedy. the comedy falls flat and the whole thing is a boring dud.

I want to believe this is true

God, it's not a great movie as it is but without the shlocky bits it would have been absolutely miserable. Studio made the right call on that one.

​@@devilmikey00 for every movie ruined by studio, there's a film saved by it

@@8Kazuja8 Corny and cheesy is fine, but you can take cheesy seriously and then let your audience have fun with it. Like Real Steel, goofy ass movie and cheesy as hell but it still has the serious moments you expect from a cheesy movie.

It was a brave decision for the movie to subtitle all the underwater warbling instead of dubbing over, but it absolutely paid off

ok

That actually made me spit good job

That's a really insensitive comment. Shame on you. I thought the story of a Westerner with too much food was very touching.

​@@aarondavis8943oh boo!! Just let people enjoy things- that comment was funny!!😂👍👍

Also I live near Waylon Jennings Grave and will make sure to leave a copy of Cocaine Bear on it.

Its just the Hollywood boom and bust cycle that has been going on for a century

We can make 10 cocaine bears and see what happens

Something had to give 🤷

​@@ButtersTheGreat1you're a legend Butters

"Hey guys we now have a dedicated category for all those sequels you despise!"

Their criteria for original screenplay is ridiculous as well. A movie like The Favourite that is based on historical events and people is considered original, whereas Glass Onion takes one existing character into a completely original story and it's considered an adaptation

@@DoctorXander an existing character created by the guy writing the sequel no less

Every script is adapted from something.

​@@DoctorXander Oh.. I see. Huh. Huh?

Like that he was dead? Or that they placed it over footage him getting ripped up because that was a joke

He was one of the people behind getting this movie made - so he chose the means of his own obituary.

I mean it kind of was - in the film there's a good five minutes between his death and the credits w/ his memorial.

The "in loving memory ", was at the beginning of credits

Wait....so it was not by RLM? Surprising. Not saying they make fun of him. But you think a professional film company would have higher standards.

Slightly disappointed we didn't see the Carrie Fisher clip from the Star Wars outtakes.

And it's about dangerous carnivorous animal acting dangerous and eating flesh (but on cocaine because le funny).

​@@kapnkerf2532 +1

Well at least they got the lighting right

Vin diesel is in it? Fck

Dude I would of as a 27 year old if my other friend didn't go and buy the tickets online. Freaking modern trends taking the fun out of everything.

@@nikkyboy1067 I love having the physical ticket I usually hold onto them and if I buy the movie on dvd or blue ray I put the ticket stub in the case so anytime I go to watch a movie I can say oh I seen that movie in theatres. Plus it’s a nice keepsake to remember when you went and what movies you’ve seen. Same with concert tickets, I prefer the hard tickets to hold onto a keep as a keepsake

@@Stewieboy1995 I use to hang on to them but never thought of putting them in the DVD case

Rebels lol

That's because they remember the 1980's.

My hero

Thank you

What happend at 7:36 ?

Many thanks. o7

He saw The Revenant one too many times before he died.

Not Turbulance?

I'll always remember him as the cop who beat the shit out of Seth Rogan in a shopping mall

@@executioner_ecgbert884 observe and report, great movie

​@@executioner_ecgbert884 we don't wanna hurt you, Ronnie. Genuinely good role.

Unless you're Robert Eggers who will make a film on a budget of 2 million dollars

"My movie studio gave me a small business loan of about 20 million dollars..."

I would easily sacrifice the best film of all time getting made if its budget went to people who actually need that money for things like staying alive.

​@@Poopscipadeidk man American psycho is pretty good

Even more crazy movies that make 100s of millions of dollars are considered failures

Absolutely. The Room is so bloody perfect because it was SUPPOSED to be good and it was awful. Stuff like Cocaine Bear was deliberately trying and that just isn't funny.

@@cfssuperhero Toxic Avenger or Bad Taste it is not

Garbage nonsense movies

Snakes on a Plane/the internet and it's impact on the movie industry has been a disaster for the human race

I forget the exact quote from an episode of Best of the Worst but it was something like "A bad movie is only entertaining if someone's dream completely failed".

I mean, for all we know, he could already be working as one. It's usually uncredited work.

The crazy part is that no one fixes the glaring flaws in the script before or during the production of the movie! Most movie scripts seem to be written as if the writers are unaware that they're allowed to go back and change things. Take Prometheus for example: if you give a character a full 3D map of a building and then decide you want him to get lost, you're allowed to go back and NOT GIVE HIM A GODDAMN MAP!

I always feel both their suggestions are always cringe stereotypical hollywood type bs, that if they actually saw in a movie, they would be ragging on

@@lucasbennett7717 Maybe, but the point is that it would have been more entertaining than what they DID see.

@@korganrocks3995 🤡

😂😂😂

And it’s up to a morbidly overweight man to stop them all.

Cocaine bear wouldve been a billion times better if it actually embraced its b movie status and had something ridiculous like that. I wantee the bear to fight the cartel or end up on a cruise ship but instead it was just dull.

Often they’re trashing things that I’m passionate about but they have valid points.

So, every conversation for me, then.

For me, it's like listening to internet friends who have never met me talk about stuff I couldn't care less about but am somehow attracted to like a moth to a flame.

I'm less passionate about movies, more about hearing two idiots talk about movies

I used to love movies. Now I just watch these reviews.

They could only afford enough CGI to have the bear onscreen for about 20 minutes throughout the movie

Agreed except I think the protagonist should have done meth so the world could finally have a conclusive answer to which is the tougher/cooler drug.

@@hansmatheson5976 both are terrible. You don't even wanna get started trust me been there done that

@@wacksonjittemore4013 That's why you make the POV high on cocaine. Just cram a guy in a bear suit and start filming

I need lovable town drunk David Harbour to get lit up with PCP and fight Cocaine Bear while intense music plays.

his alcoholism has cost him too many braincells

He has Willis brain

I think that was piranha 3-DD, the sequel. In the Waterpark. The 3d one was mostly on open water...a wind surfer gets her boobs eaten and Jerry O'Connell gets his dick chewed off and you see it float in the water. 😂

Regardless, tho. The one with the Hoff was fun

And immediately after Jay says what Mike wanted to say in comprehensible terms. Jay is gonna be Mike's old man interpreter in the future when the karmic dementia inevitably kicks in.

... movie

😂😂😂😂😂😂

what you don't realize is that Mike was speaking the language of his people.

@@PashaandDrosha that'd be the most funny yet sad thing if Mike got Dementia and had to be wheeled around everywhere

They never got to go kayaking. Tragic.

Me too. I think it's because my own life is so filled with disappointments.

Maybe the true horror was the friends we made along the way. Chilling, I know.

I agree with you, it really put you in his shoes.

@@SpawnRevenge92 he didn't even wear shoes

Cameron Mitchell sat so Brendan Fraiser could lay.

Brendan's been through a Tums festival. He earned this.

I agree, Cameron Mitchell definitely deserves a posthumous Oscar

​@@Neodeleux 🤣🤣🤣

Fraiser got his daughter to close that f-ing door, at least.

The book doesn't give you a definitive ending. Which is why I thought he was adapting it. I guess the twist is he decided not to do the twist. 🤷

That's all of his movies since The Village.

@@msanjelica what was the twist in the book?

@@Albtraum_TDDC Just that you are never told if the apocalypse was real. All the intruders die, the little girl is accidentally killed, and the story basically ends. We don't find out what happens when they leave the woods.

The twist is that was no twist

That shit cracked me up

There will always be potential for a sequel like Aliens, but Cocaine Bears. One of the survivors gets reluctantly recruited to join an elite team of overconfident park rangers to investigate a town wiped out by like 50 cocaine bears. At the climax, he rails a shitload of cocaine to take on the last super dripped bear.

@@motorcycleboy9000 or maybe one of the survivors is contacted to join a couple of park rangers on a remote island where Cocaine Bears are running amok, and the climax is a corporation shipping back the last super dripped bear to the big city, but it breaks loose Call it Cocaine Bear 2: The Lost World

@@motorcycleboy9000 I have an idea for a cocaine bear sequel: Set it at Christmas, at a zoo, during a snowstorm (Chicago is probably the best place to set it in). A drug trafficking ring is housing bricks of cocaine inside the zoo, with intent on distributing to the rest of the city. But, due to a surprise fight between two of the POLAR BEARS, a Zookeeper who's not in on the criminal activity ends up moving the more aggressive polar bear into an intentionally unused exhibit where there's a stash of cocaine being hidden. The polar bear breaks out, smashes through a wall, and starts rampaging, with the blizzard surrounding the few remaining guests and staff that cuts them off from escaping. So you get to upgrade from brown bear to POLAR BEAR, the biggest bear in the world. You also get a bunch of fun imagery with white snow, that not only alludes to coke, but also hides the bear as he sneaks up on people. It'd be GREAT.

His idea is unworkable on Cocaine Bears budget.

Sorry that you and your mom died.

This user was later found to have died two months ago. His mom is doing fine, though.

@@revlarmilion9574 We'll never know for sure.. because it's the family account

@@revlarmilion9574 ☠️ ((lol))

Cocaine Bear vs all the horrible live action Disney remake characters.

Just Ariel singing about wanting to be part of our world, before being torn out of the water by Cocaine Bear, it could work! The anti-Kingdom Hearts, so to speak.

Cocaine bear vs the whale sounds enough. Lol

​@@corywilson2007 Oh, and the reason Brendan Fraser got overweight is as a result of using the magic carpet from Aladdin too much, I think.

Versus should be vs. Who's knocking now, is unwieldy. I'll watch it when it drops but your projected title needs work. Does brandon risk pissing off peta by wearing a whale suit though.

hear, hear!

Exactly

​@@unclephillymya 20 years blacklisted, I wanted an Oscar

@@jonasastrom7422 I ate grilled cheese off a radiator

hollywood is dying? 🤨

This is a super underrated comment/suggestion.

sometimes it's just nice to get away

​@YRDPK You can appreciate that as an adult, but as a kid, what are you going to do? Make some snow angels and snowmen for 10-15 minutes, then get cold, come inside, and be bored.

​@@NecromancyForKids Video Games

@@NecromancyForKids my grandma lived in a pretty remote disney-esque cottage when I was younger. we'd just go fuck about in the woods making huts out of sticks and exploring, get tired and go back then have some dinner in front of the fire and pass out.

*Cue family driving up to Julian in the winter for no other reason than "experiencing the snow"*

It's nice just to see a Half in the Bag again with new and popular theatrical movies. I hope they keep it up. For a while it felt like a worse BotW.

Gay night club* He's known as the big white depressed bear

I like your pizza tower music

Dick the Cocaine Bear is a whole new level to explore.

rick evans in the manhole

Oh hey POST ELVIS

Yep. My girlfriend and I are literally renting out a cabin for a long weekend in the middle of Maine for just this reason. We're probably just going to relax in a hot tub for 4 days and stare at a lake. You really can't beat that. Like, there is a central hub for all the cabins where you can kayak or eat food but like... Nah My profile picture might show up but I'll die happy

hahaha I went too. All my highschool friends had a sleepover right after

It was absolutely a “You had to be there” type of movie, and seeing it with a full house was a legitimately great experience.

I had a similar experience with Deep Blue Sea. Tried to watch it at home and realized how bad it really was… but man that theater was having fun.

Yeah, Jays editing never fails to deliver comedy gold

Good content

The cancellation of Doom Patrol hurts more than the whipping.

@@recnepsrc Literally worse than slavery, sad.

It was great fun watching the movie. Very hilarious had me chuckling..

That's high praise

They broke new ground!!!!!

😲😲😲😳😳😳

Nice

Beloved Actress Margo Martindale had a lasting impression in that film for sure.

I was surprised to see Beloved Character Actress Margo Martindale show up, as I'd completely blanked the annoying trailers from my memory.

Or failing that, Christopher Walken

I want to see Cocainebearsnakes on a plane.

One day Hollywood will follow this bizarre trend of current Japanese media naming conventions, and then it'll all be over. "I went to a cabin in the woods with my husband and daughter when the riders of the apocalypse knocked on our door - NOW in theaters. Or streaming ... somewhere."

@@electricboogaloo5645 Starring ... Michael Caine : It's not your cocaine it's mine! All My Cocaine.

Plane

The Robert Zemeckis school of movie titles Examples Back to the Future What Lies Beneath Cast Away Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Contact Flight The list goes on…

Yes. It's soothing to watch people talk about movies I'll never see.

My friend doesn’t have an inner monologue, I don’t understand how he thinks

Yeah, the boys let me forget my existential dread for a hour whenever they upload.

Personally, I enjoy imagining Duke Nukem saying my most insane intrusive thoughts, kinda takes the piss out of them a bit.

Jay is the snooty, passive aggressive, stuck up film snob. You can tell by his fancy Wisconson accent. He rarely says exactly how he feels but he does say things like "I feel embarrassed for this movie." When he made Space Cop.

@@ryanatthediscotec7758 he feels embarrassed for that too!

@@ryanatthediscotec7758 Jay's insufferable, but thankfully Mike is suffering, so it evens out.

​@@ryanatthediscotec7758 Fancy and Wisconsin in the same sentence 🤣

Never forget that Jay doesn’t like Bladerunner. The best sci-fi noir film of all time.

Hey it's winter in WI you have to put on ten pounds to survive

​@@Naomi.Robertson What's his excuse for the extra 30

They didn't use any make up or suits 😯

"So what do you do in Lake City while it is snowed in?" "Drink. Tie flies." "What if you run out of beer?" "F*ck." "I'll make sure we don't run out of beer."

Can't wait to see Rich Evans in Cocaine Bear 2: The Showtime Crisis

And the Oscar goes to: Daniel Day-Lewis in The Man Getting Hit By Football, written & directed by Señor Spielbergo

One is a movie for Redditors, the other is a movie about a Redditor

Most whales have at least one heart.

That's a Simpsons reference! ☝🤓

Actually the whale barely had a heart It's a pretty central plot point, as a matter of fact.

Signs is way overrated and most people speak of it from a point of nostalgia

And having that movie come out in the year after 9/11 played perfectly into our anxiety with the news at the time. A lot about that movie doesn't hold up now--the stupid alien twist, Mel Gibson in general--but those news scenes are scary as hell still.

@@JeonardShadby505 Aliens from Signs: Let's go invade acid world naked!

@@JeonardShadby505 Signs is slightly better if you think of the aliens as demons instead. The daughter "blessing" the water and making it effective against them. Also helps cover the "why no technology" aspect of the 'aliens'. *shrug

Same thoughts, I was a teen watching that movie, and when I went into it, I had no knowledge of the film. I don't know why but I assumed it would be a bit more like a close encounters type movie with mystery and intrigue. Instead, it was spooky, and up until that scene, I thought it would be some twist that the aliens weren't evil or something else was going on. When you see the footage of the alien outside a kid's party, it became so real and terrifying. I think the idea of being in your home, worried about whats outside making that noise and then seeing someone, especially with a kid's party going on that should be happy and fun, just really hits at something primal and scary.

She's great in The Americans also

@@thecluckingassassin I've never actually seen that, had no idea she was in it! Thanks for the tip.

You mean acclaimed character actress Margo Martindale?

I heard she went into hiding after robbing a bank or something. Its good to know she's still getting good work.

She's doing fine. She's one of the most sought out character actors out there. Not everyone can be A-list and not everything is sO uNdeRraTed.

Seconded! I think GQ (or a similar mag) did a profile on him a few years back before his career renaissance, one of those where the interviewer comes down to spend a couple of days just talking to the subject. Early on, Brendan, clearly going through some stuff (over-the-hill, his marketable years fading behind him, and so on), just up and says something to the effect of "I just need to let some arrows fly, y'know?" He then walked out onto the porch and just started shooting some arrows with a bow (seemingly ready to go for just this purpose) at a well-used target down in the yard. I think he even offered to let the interviewer shoot a few. That, and his whole mature attitude about getting older and coming to grips with faded stardom, always stuck with me.

The Brenaissance is real

Except from people who couldn't tell the difference between the movie and a reflective screen

Yeah, because we’ve been missing such masterpieces as Encino Man, George of the Jungle, and Airheads. A regular Brando.

@@stephenbarone4053 My God you're miserable.

Hollywood is quite aware of RedLetterMedia.

I think the movie changed it from a Black Bear, as it was IRL, to a Grizzly Bear, but I feel the premise can be workshopped further, make it a Kodiak Bear or Polar Bear (change the location if needed), and then replace the cocaine with PCP, Meth, and Steroids. Optionally, use a Tiger or Gorilla instead.

I had to run out of the theater to not spill my guts out thinking of him smashing his daughter

i’m laughing so hard at this now

Hahahahaha

The whole script made me laugh. Such a dogshit movie.

I was honestly expecting that to happen lol

Bc Mike and Jay don’t open their show matsturbating to gay p0rn

Because Mike is the drunken script wizard and Jay is his DD.

And of course when he and Brendan get their awards, now everyone is like "So are you gonna do a new Mummy film? Are you gonna do an Indiana Jones spinoff as Short Round?" and it's like, for pete sake people, let these guys acclimate themselves proper first before trying to throw them back into the franchise machine meat grinder!

Maybe a few fart noises too

They all sound generic and terrible to me lol

@@emmobrien That's the kind of schlock Mike loves. 😉

did you think he was going to say choke on em?

@@conan2096 I kinda did!

I feel bad that this was his last movie and hope he isn't remembered as "The guy who died while filming cocaine bear"

​@@executioner_ecgbert884 no he died while filming swamp mamas

I have no idea what swamp Mama's is, but that honestly sounds way worse

​@@Dantegrey1 I feel like botw would work better for those ones 😂

A BOTW featuring The Hobbit movies.

What is there to say that hasn't been said already, though?

@@SpawnRevenge92 true enough. That's probably why we won't ever get a Batman review

Or they edited that part out.

Must be because of the lighting

Its the scruffy bear hairdo.

There is an analysis somewhere about the differences, and the film version is basically how Stockholme Syndrome turns victims into cultists. Except the director is also a cultist and thinks he's revealing the Secret Truth. Very popular among the people who'd kill children based on voices in their heads.

"Take Shelter" is the movie you're talking about.

People like to be M. Night apologists in many different ways. In RLM's case, it's great that M. Night is now "shlock". In reality, he's just a pseudo-mystic who makes bad movies that never make any sense.

Yeah, I'm also not a fan of the changes that were made.

Didn’t he also destroy avatar/last air bender?

Especially if we expand it to news media.

The idea of some grossly underpaid member of the MPAA extensively verifying accounts and cross-referencing sources to determine if a movie is an 8 or a 9 on Mike's true story scale is really funny.

It threw me into the uncanny valley until I realized which one I was actually looking at

How do you up the ante for a sequel? Cocaine BEARS. They could absolutely go that route for a sequel.

“They didn’t find ALL the cocaine” Cocaine Bear 2: The Sleuth

Sounds like a don wilson pitch

Never thought I'd see one of my favorite UFC prediction shows in the comments of an RLM video.

@@TheMostWanted92 It's the two cubs. They literally put 2 bears who are raised on cocaine in the movie. They are gonna go absolutely apeshit in the eventual sequel, and there will be a touching reunion between the two bears and the two kids (now teens). Cocaine Bear 2: 2 Cocaine Bears.

I'm sad I can't remember what this comment said 😮‍💨

Just when i needed it. Monday morning at work

Who are you where am I

Why am I holding a tiny television. I’m confused and scared

😂 hahaha this comment is always super funny

It was directed by Neil Breen.

It’s the lighting. They’ve progressively improved their lighting setup skills, as well as lighting gear. But afaik, it’s just how they staged the lights this episode. I noticed it was different. They’ve really been producing some lovely looking shots in all of their stuff lately. Look at how great BotW looks nowadays! It looked like junk years ago lol.

@@itsd0nk thank you D0nk