He Lost His Virginity To The...Lunch Lady? - Stand Up Comedy - Geoffrey Asmus

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An unbelievable series of moments from my recent shows in Cincinnati. Truly astonishing I post this for free.
If you liked this buy tickets to my neverending tour - www.whitecomedian.com/schedule
I have upcoming shows in Toronto, New Jersey, Spokane, Seattle, Fort Collins, NYC, Las Vegas, Connecticut, Tulsa, Memphis, Minneapolis, Omaha, Houston and so many more.
Sign up for my mailing list to find out when I perform near you - eepurl.com/h_HMIX
Also listen to my incredible podcast You're An Idiot with Alex Dragicevich. New episodes on RU-vid every Monday - / youreanidiot
I love to give the algorithm funny stand up comedy jokes. Funny!
Please leave a comment whether you enjoyed the video or not.
For the algorithm - stand up comedy - comedy - jokes - hilarious - robots rock - wow - stand up comedy - stand up stand up stand up stand up funny joke wow viral. Social media is a hellscape.

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Опубликовано:

31 май 2024

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Комментарии : 230

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

If you like this, come see me on tour - linktr.ee/Geoffreyatm11 Upcoming shows in Las Vegas, Tulsa, Minneapolis, Seattle, Fargo, Detroit, Edmonton, Sioux Falls, Fort Collins, Spokane, Hamilton, Toronto and so many more unfortunately. Or Sign up for my email list to find when I'm performing near you - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@kenpachikiking6179 Месяц назад

I signed up. Can't wait to see you in Buffalo someday.

@sterling9852 Месяц назад

Lunch lady made him sloppy John

@sergeiarend3392 Месяц назад

That "abortion joke in the first trimester" was amazing 😂 Pretty sure it'll never get old. Just like... nvm

@anywallsocket Месяц назад

Twisted Teas and Plan Bs is insane 😂😂😂

@patrick815 Месяц назад

That coming back for seconds was lighting fast and brilliant

@dynamopro2928 Месяц назад

Council of Trent 🤣😂

@andrewpiao7589 Месяц назад

I'm voting for this guys balls. Left pres, right vice.

@aertos_xas Месяц назад

Bro, you have the best crowd management skills I've ever seen. Kudos

@thyhandrevolve 19 дней назад

-because he HATH-possession of THE best crowd management skills on the still-living PLANET.

@donflo3 Месяц назад

“You graduated high school and came back for seconds” I need to have my stomach pumped 💀

@areichental Месяц назад

#1 crowd work moment of all time. This could be on a special.

@JudasIscariot81 Месяц назад

I love that Google lists Geoffrey as a musical artist.

@pwrhr Месяц назад

Writing in Miss Doris

@tacoma87x Месяц назад

I'm writing in Geoffrey for prez.

@biuliu7157 Месяц назад

That shirt response was insane. Based Geoff

@rextilian 17 дней назад

Please be ruthless with the Edmonton crowd about the Stanley Cup loss.

@Highsinberg420 Месяц назад

Can’t wait for the new special Geoffrey! Come back to Appleton!

@jcenergy2493 Месяц назад

Always hilarious! Thanks for your work 😊

@robertbrowning7054 Месяц назад

Killing it as always. Missed the guitar playing :D

@lukecarey613 Месяц назад

It’s the only reason I’m here.

@abej9790 Месяц назад

Spokane is Geoffrey's favorite city. I see all other cities come and go in upcoming shows but Spokane is always there. Even in Europe tour it was like Paris, Berlin, Spokane, Amsterdam ...

@jessem5564 Месяц назад

Wow! One of the greatest crowd work videos of all time! I'm voting for this Geoffrey Asmus guy!

@kenpachikiking6179 Месяц назад

F-ing gold everytime!

@KidontheSlope Месяц назад

Killing it!

@davidarellano870 Месяц назад

Friggin Excellent!!

@michaeldempsey3281 Месяц назад

Your Catholic riffs are hilarious and pretty high reference. Love it!

@thunderstruck1392 Месяц назад

Joe B... Comedy is free speech!

@JasonRDamon2567 Месяц назад

One of your best

@galufeta Месяц назад

Oof, can't wait for that special.

@TheoMurpse Месяц назад

The crowdwork is so good

@troyhongsermeier9462 Месяц назад

undoubtedly Biden; missed you in SoCal but hope to see you in FoCo

@TheTexican05 Месяц назад

You found the golden treasure chest when you called on “John the lunch lady banger”… 😆 👏

@jeffreykipperman6894 Месяц назад

Honestly Geoff, I might vote for you. You're under 80, liberal minded, funny as hell, and play guitar.

@vjmickelson1 Месяц назад

When are you coming back to the Phoenix area? You killed at Mic Drop Mania in Chandler. (I’d suggest waiting until summers over though.)

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

im back in the winter thank god. sign up for my dumb email list and ill let you know when those tix go on sale - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@R.J.MacReady1982 Месяц назад

Vancouver BC next tour sesh. ❤ much love dude

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

i love vancouver. im coming back in the winter. sign up for my dumb email list and ill let you know when those tix go on sale - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@R.J.MacReady1982 Месяц назад

@@GeoffreyAsmus done deal. Winter is a good time. December 4th is my birthday. ❤️ hahah

@kobalt9948 Месяц назад

You rip dude. Thx for coming to Canada.

@YoGeeJeTeLoL Месяц назад

You got my vote

@drewruff410 Месяц назад

I’m voting for you

@fanta5778 Месяц назад

One upping the rhyme with extortion and abortion is next level

@maverick7291 Месяц назад

You know what they say; if you don't vote, you don't have the right to complain.

@jasongravely7217 Месяц назад

How come so many people who vote complain then?

@jsmith434w Месяц назад

not voting in protest is better than voting out of obligation. you are just sheepishly participating in a system rigged against you

@rhiannablumberg4803 13 дней назад

LMAO.... fucking love it... Doris... so LOLed so hard

@michaelh8854 Месяц назад

Looking forward to the new special

@MrSknottykid Месяц назад

😂😂😂 Hilarious!

@michaelgiacomini4215 Месяц назад

This did in fact make me laugh.

@cp-sh9nj Месяц назад

Fishnets ❌ Hairnets ✅

@cindyfofi5160 Месяц назад

Love that you have a special!!!!! Please come back to Charlotte Geoff! Shoot it here! Like Rife did....only better!! ❤️❤️

@BuchananSalmon Месяц назад

Come to Alaska!

@borlanderobertson5666 2 дня назад

I wish you were playing Comedy works in Denver but Wende has a terrible booker rn😢😢😢 but Davids club is dope I am driving the hour for you❤

@GeoffreyAsmus День назад

davids club is dopeeee

@eemoogee160 Месяц назад

We don't have a democracy but definitely voting against the duopoly.

@no_snap Месяц назад

Vermin Supreme for prez! As long as Asmus is VP

@PapaWolfDogZeus Месяц назад

I was gonna leave a comment on the last video, but there was no guitar

@johnburke8375 Месяц назад

I’m voting Asmus 2024

@sidsmith8385 Месяц назад

Great off the cuff comedy.. 🇦🇺

@DSled Месяц назад

You keep crushing

@kayne3232 Месяц назад

Joey B all day

@Nicky_Dore Месяц назад

Another alpha set

@dogchaser520 Месяц назад

Alpha's RISE UP !!! 🫎🫎🫏

@nutcazbasbax Месяц назад

Come to Brisbane, Australia!

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

never

@nutcazbasbax Месяц назад

@@GeoffreyAsmus you know you want to

@tameshewolf Месяц назад

How did you know I need comment prompts!? I'm not American though so this one does not apply to me 😅

@dogchaser520 Месяц назад

Pretend you are. On the internet, Americans think everyone is an American (literally, I'm not kidding)

@tameshewolf Месяц назад

@@dogchaser520 hahaha

@TommyLikeTom Месяц назад

the "weird camera angle" at the end reminds me of the genius that was tobuscus, and how people like you only have a chance because he was taken down by some kind of weird conspiracy involving keemstar.

@rhiannablumberg4803 13 дней назад

love the aborsh joke dude! Come to LOL SA soon please!!!

@GeoffreyAsmus 13 дней назад

i did LOL last fall. Ill be back in early 2025. sign up for my dumb email list and ill let you know when those tix go on sale - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@abfleks Месяц назад

So funny... i don't get how he is this funny and has 54k subs...

@delamomanny Месяц назад

So underrated man

@TommyLikeTom Месяц назад

there was some lady in the crowd boiling an old fashioned kettle

@SailorGreenTea Месяц назад

Yay

@JudasIscariot81 Месяц назад

How she scoops tbe goulash 😂

@swagavelli93 Месяц назад

I'm voting for Lunch Lady Doris

@L6e200011 Месяц назад

❤

@NoelBuller Месяц назад

Geoff, you’re the best! Need to see you before blow up and start acting like Chappelle

@adverteasing Месяц назад

SOTD = Lunchlady Land -A. Sandler

@oppositeofh8 Месяц назад

thanks for lowering your standards & finally coming back to seattle. oh & i'm voting for you to shave that beard.

@itsTtttank Месяц назад

Twisted teas and plan B's 🫠

@bendelosangeles3560 Месяц назад

You've been looking great lately! The beard looks great on you. You are funny as always~ Come to San Diego soon! You were here recently, right? Biden ALL THE WAY! We really can do without a convicted felon in office again?

@daratencion3845 Месяц назад

ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-USqPl0Yr7dM.htmlsi=qxcPS2SYIzKKS3Fj Preeminent Legal scholar Dedicated Lib Dem Supporter and friend of Biden says Trump not a C F. He says bogus case that will unravel in appeals and that the Dem apparatus operating unconstitutionally.

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

5 shows in SD in december. sign up for my dumb email list and ill let you know when those tix go on sale - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@randoru1871 Месяц назад

😂😂😂

@emperorbingo Месяц назад

Denver please

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

im there in the winterrrr. sign up for my dumb email list and ill let you know when those tix go on sale - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@DjSubstain Месяц назад

Are you doing a show in Norway or Sweden by any chance? Would love to see you live.

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

it will be on the next european tour. sign up for my dumb email list and ill let you know when those tix go on sale - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@DjSubstain Месяц назад

@@GeoffreyAsmus Will do! Thanks!

@DexteroExplosion Месяц назад

😂

@Landmeinz Месяц назад

Voting for the lunch lady

@wilsonfields7969 Месяц назад

Still waiting for you to come back to DC

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

just booked for late this year. sign up for my dumb email list and ill let you know when those tix go on sale - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@gabrielgreen9883 Месяц назад

Buy this dude gin and tonics and forgive your mothers

@evdm7482 22 дня назад

Torches n pitch forks by the time you’re outa gods country… ‘pitch forks’ could be the south’s shark tank

@04azgoat Месяц назад

Add Phoenix to your stops!!!!

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

going there in the winterrr. sign up for my dumb email list and ill let you know when those tix go on sale - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@AJohnSmith Месяц назад

Sloppy toppy, Joe.

@NathanRussell-lo8kd Месяц назад

Geoff. Please come back to SF my dear boy!

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

fine i am next januaryyyy. sign up for my dumb email list and ill let you know when those tix go on sale - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@SenorDecimus Месяц назад

Come to San Diego

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

5 shows there in decemberrr. sign up for my dumb email list and ill let you know when those tix go on sale - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@speakatron5634 Месяц назад

Let's go

@joeygio Месяц назад

I’m voting for jackson s.

@richardshalla Месяц назад

How about Ottawa Ontario?

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

literally there on wednesday but its sold out...

@G_Whiz Месяц назад

Plot twist: He was attending the show with the lunch lady's husband.

@matthew3770 Месяц назад

both those guys getting sloppy seconds

@TheSpaceMomma Месяц назад

JERSEY ! JERSEY !

@zacharybrowning4918 Месяц назад

Alpha comedy 💪

@jamesmckinney3264 Месяц назад

I will vote for any candidate that pledges to put bidets in public school bathrooms.

@johnmcfarlane8610 14 дней назад

Come to Kansas City!

@GeoffreyAsmus 13 дней назад

fineeeee. its on the docket for early 2025. sign up for my dumb email list and ill let you know when those tix go on sale - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@gabrielgreen9883 Месяц назад

Voting Poilièvre in Canada

@JudasIscariot81 Месяц назад

Come back to Montreal

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

im literally there on tuesday. but its sold out...

@JudasIscariot81 Месяц назад

@@GeoffreyAsmus damn it, I should keep up. Fine, next year you fucking GOAT.

@knaz7468 Месяц назад

man you got some serious softballs in this one ... fodder for the alpha

@psicobassmanecdqemsd Месяц назад

being a catholic since birth, i can double down on this alpha comedians take on it being the one true faith.

@psicobassmanecdqemsd Месяц назад

also, the pope being a piece of manure is true as well.

@santiagonava92 Месяц назад

come to Addison in texas I love you

@GeoffreyAsmus Месяц назад

doing dallas this fallllll. sign up for my dumb email list and ill let you know when those tix go on sale - eepurl.com/h_HMIX

@santiagonava92 Месяц назад

@geoffreyasmus yes!! the only reason I may not attend is because your god tier comedy may end up making my girlfriend more wet than I ever could. Jk we will both be there, will there be a splash zone?