“A man is NATURALLY going to reduce the role of another woman in his life, when he meets his WIFE” ... 💯❗️ and he definitely shouldn’t need to be told /asked to do so ❤️
He doesn't want to let the "Friend" go because she's on another level & has his mind open, while you only have his pants unzipped. True words spoken!! 🙌🏾💯
And he very well could be the daddy too! I don’t think any male “ friend” would want to be in the delivery room dealing with all that... there’s some funny business here
In the past, I’ve been the “ female friend” in a situation like this. He 100% wants his friend and she probably doesn’t want him, that’s why he’s willing to stay her BFF he’ll take any title she will give him. And if she ever decides to upgrade their friendship, he’ll leave his girlfriend.
Very true. I have a similar situation with a friend. Every woman that he meets and really likes he starts telling them about me. Of course, the chick bounces.
That’s what I did for male best friends when they got married... I backed all the way back to be respectful of their wives and marriages and they did the same
This is true I have lost some friends because they got married and you have to respect their relationship when I get married I’m not letting no other female around my husband either because I have lost best friends also so their is no excuses
amen!!! That is what a mature minded woman will do!! Insecure, petty woman will try to keep her position, trying to keep asserting herself in your man''s life, but a TRUE FRIEND will back up and also genuinely befriend you - his woman - and become more friend for you than she was to him...IF she is a true friend. She will respect the relationship and it will show.
This man is not lying. If you even smell another woman on a guy you're dating Runnnnnn. Friends of the opposite sex ain't nothing to play with. There is no such thing as a veryyyy close friend of the opposite when you're in a relationship. Boundaries (most of the times) get crossed. That is nothing to play with. Wisdom should be practiced. Also, if someone is your husband you'll know.
@@handelnuremberg8757 even if you're not exclusive and you see that the person you're dating is very attached to a friend of the opposite sex (always on the phone with them, telling them your business, they are closer to them than you etc.) dont continue with that person. Trust me, I've been there and I'm sure that many people in the comment section can tell you that in their situation there was always a friend that their bf/gf/person they were dating told them not to worry about, only to find out that they were messing around with them. Sometimes after you break up they saw them together. If the person you're dating has aquaintaces of the opposite sex, that's different, your intuition won't have you second guessing their relation to each other.
Major lesson I will make sure I live by- do not go back to the man you rejected.. he will dog you.. men never forget when you rejected them. Wooo a word . 💯💯💯
THIS!!!! This is why the cycle continues. We become willing participants in our on pain and frustration because we refuse to learn and grow from our past experiences. We are responsible for our choices...why do you keep choosing like that??? That's on you boo...lol. Help Lord, cause once you deal with that root, you'll graduate.
Tony you are correct about how long a man will wait. I’m 61 years old and my husband pasted away one year ago. This man I knew 40 years ago found me on Facebook. He got married 40 years ago and now going through a separation. I had tell him don’t disrespect the memory of my husband and our 25 year marriage I am not lonely for anyone but my husband. He said we’re friends I’ve known you for 40 years. I told him go work it out with your wife your going through the midlife change. PERIOD
A lot of times too women get into competition with the other woman trying to win instead of focusing on the issues the man have and that they really need to leave him.
Not some...most...most of us are fools and need constant guidance because men are so manipulative and we're so conditioned and incorrectly socialized in dealing with them...That's why men like Tony are so vital. I just hope she wakes up and sees what's happening in front of her....
@@Yna-u3g I totally agree. I have definitely had my foolish woman moment. But I leaned my lesson and I refuse to allow a grown boy in my life. Because, my cut off game is strong, once I smell BS it’s a rap for me. The sooner the better.
@@lekeshiacole9065 I swear and we definitely have to be seasoned in the game because grown boys are walking around in abundance...they're like flies!😷...
A male cousin once told me in order for a man to be friends with you he has to like you first. All my male “friends” tried to date me at some point. He’s sleeping with her or is interested in doing so... there’s nothing like man/woman friendship. He’s the telling the other woman you’re just a friend too.
Me and girlie making this discovery a few weeks ago (we're 19) they become homeboys after it doesn't work or you shut it down only reason they still in your life is coz they have in a way accepted for now coz if they didn't back off you'd have cut em off a while ago
You know what...Black Women could build their OWN studio solely off the profit of our stories!😅😅😅...We should stop letting men profit from our foolishness and do it ourselves!! We'd be powerhouse moguls!😅😅😅
I have been victim to this very topic. My ex husband got a blessing from his BF to marry me. Found out later that her very own marriage proposal did not workout. She began to confide in and pursue my husband and all hell broke loose. I saw the signs but couldn't leave yet bc I was nursing him back to health(long but interesting story), in between jobs and getting my renters out of my home. I made my plans, stuck to it and left the day after New Years. He and the BF had a child that they thought I knew nothing about. Fast-forward to the end of story... BF is single, he doesnt see or take care of the baby, she's not married. My Ex is partially paralyzed (not by me), lost everything. Im divorced and will use this story to help others. Thanks Tony for reminding me that its time to start writing my book and telling this story to help others.
This is eye opening. Ladies who he confides in is who he trusts,loves,and will go to war for. How he makes you feel in a relationship is how he feels about you!
Men will get back with you to get you back and then put you on your back. 💯 I’ve seen it happen. It’s part of the game. It’s fun for him. He’s not serious. He’s just having fun. If he was serious, he would have cut her off as soon as you both reconnected. He would have ditched her pregnant and all. Men can be cold hearted like that if they need to be and choose to be
I was told this in my twenties and reminded in my thirties about so-called male bff’s. I argued who I was with and always defended my friendships of the opposite sex. I was extremely wrong and learned the hard way. Thank you and be blessed.
Confirmation, Confirmation, Confirmation!! That’s why ABSTINENCE = TOTAL PEACE OF MIND 🙏🏼 just saying...As always, I appreciate Life Coach Tony Gaskins unapologetic advice on everyday relationships - the truth! You and your beautiful family continue to Stay Blessed! 🙏🏼
The more I listen to these videos and examine my past, what Tony has said in the past, that when we are not living in our purpose, we get entangled in so much stuff. We have way too much time to do so much damage to ourselves instead of growing, changing and healing and being an agent of change. Thank the Lord for Tony who always teaches staying on the narrow road.
He was dead on about the way a man thinks the worst of you. I had the same experience with my husband where he said I was getting sloppy about my “cheating” and all I did was go to work and come home.
-Y’all better listen to what Tony’s saying he’s saying the absolute hard truth. I once heard one of my male coworkers say “there’s not ONE of his female FRIENDS back home in TX he wouldn’t smash “ and he’s the type to have women lusting after him left & right. Don’t be naive 🤣
Omggggg.... that’s his baby 🤔 lady WAKE UP. Who wants to be in a delivery room for a baby who’s not his. Plus they lived together 😂. Don’t be 48 & naive.
@@Leelang931 Exactly he needs a Covid test to be in the delivery room. The hospitals are not even playing in this pandemic. That’s his baby and they moving in together again.
You are so right... no man is bestfriends to a woman. He will try you.. I had a guy friend who waited 4 years to try to sleep with me & at the time I was still saving myself and not sleeping around he said exactly this WORD FOR WORD LADIES “I respect what you doing and all but not tryna have any females around me that’s not trying to have s**”. Please listen to Tony!!! 🙏🏽🙏🏽 he’s not wrong at all.
He’s the daddy. The end. He Only told her she got pregnant by someone else. No male “friend” would want to be in the delivery room to see all that. There are some many 🚩! 🤦🏽♀️
Wow Tony thank you for saving this lady I pray ! what women wants her male friend in the delivery room with her there’s no shame or modesty in that room when pain gets severe trust me !!! that’s all the red flags she needed It’s his baby period! God Bless you my spiritual son please keep preaching the truth in Love , She’s gotta go !!
I get called insecure and controlling for not allowing all that “female friend” bs in my committed relationships. I don’t care though, because what gain would you be getting from another woman that you couldn’t get from your partner? Especially if you have other female family members in your life who play an active role. You have male friends, you have female family, and you have a girlfriend. A female friend is compartmentalism of women. You just want them so you have other women easily accessible to you if ever you get the chance to.
If you listen to/read the lyrics of “You make me wanna by Usher”, that confirms everything Tony said. Usher is a grown boy and it describes what he wants to do with his “best friend”.
20 years and now divorced. Do you know these so called "friends" have hit me up.............and they are married? Listen to Tony. He ain't lying. Just keep living. Keep those legs closed ladies.
All I want sis to do is take this advice and keep it moving. There is no need to meet up to get to know the best friend either. Side note: When the red flags present themselves, don't come up with your own scenarios to downplay them. Just move and save yourself from a lot of chaos, confusion, and soul-ties. Have a blessed day, Blessed Tribe ❤
Uncle Tony is always spot on. Recently when he mentioned that when you go on a date with a man and offer to pay YOUR portion, it makes you stand out in his mind. Welp.. Uncle Tony was right. Tuesday I went on a first date. When the check came I offered to pay my portion. He looked at me and said "of course not" the next day when we were on the phone his exact words were "it's refreshing to go on a date with someone that offered to pay for something. Although, I wouldn't allow you to pay but it means a lot. Because nowadays ppl are takers"
Because you offered, be careful. His response was that it was refreshing. Just be careful with your money. That’s all. I had a man that would give me money here and there just to help out, but later... the tables turned, and he started asking me for money
Sis, you did exactly what Tony did say to do on the first date and that's right there's nothing desperate here paying your half gives you more value, now some people just listen to listen, they don't pay attention they don't get the message right they may get the message but don't know how and when to apply it in life situations they just confuse and mess up everything. That's sad.
I don't normally comment but I was not expecting a WHOLE ROAST tonight! put everyone and their motives on blast fr. This video offered the whole perspective and reality of many relationships 😳 haha listen to it twice!
I LOVE Tony Gaskins!!! SO GOOD! Some women don't know boundaries. They can't be talking to married men and expect to be respected by other females. No female likes homewrecker or women who flirt or send mixed messages to married men!
Tony, I wish I had your advice about 20 years ago. I've been through so much with different men. You could've saved me some heart ache. I am now happily celibate and not dating for the past 2 years.
Some of you all in the comments judging and making fun of this lady need to stop. You've looked the same way she has and someone had to have patience and grace with you. I'm just saying, no need to rub it in in that manner.. Be nice because guess what.. all these vids y'all watching.. but YOU'RE NEXT.
I don't understand it either ...I know you have to make light of things sometimes to get the point across but at the end of the day Tony is being really serious ...seem like folk think this is comedy ????? There are lessons be learned from every one and every situation....I don't know what this lady thought Tony would say to her however I do hope she will listen and take some action for her life and her happiness 💕🙏🏾💕
@@nikkyshamz2696 The wisdom here is: "Judge ye not lest you be judged. For with the same measure you use it will be measured back to you.". "If" Conditional. Yes they are next unfortunately. (Some are already..present, others past, others future.).
Exactly! Every woman has played a fool for some man in their life at one point or another. The situation may have been different, but a fool is a fool. So, just because you have gotten past certain seasons does not put you in the position to judge.
All of that friends stuff is nonsense. It sounds like CB female friend likes the benefits of being in a relationship minus the commitment. CB female friend will continue to over step the respect line and ask CB for favors that she should be getting from a single man. CB keeping that female close and doing favors like helping her move, and anything else that she will be asking of him down the line because it makes him feel like a totally competent man. All this just friends stuff means sex in the past or future. Neither person wants to move on to actually become available mentally, morally and physical. Women love getting favors from another woman's man.
It’s very true. Men and women can’t really be friends without emotional feelings being tied. I’m friends with an ex and he likes to say “best friends”. I just say “friends” because he is here for me when I need him and vice versa. we do talk about his dates he goes on and all. He is even here for me when it comes to my kids. He just took my son to his first job interview. So yes we are friends however, I’m no fool. This man is very genuine yes but at the same time this man is still in love with me. This is why he sees me as his “Bestfriend” wishing one day that I will see him the way he sees me.
The straight men I know want to be sexual. They refuse to be friends with me. My male best friend is gay. I tried to be friends with straight men over the years to no avail. A woman told me that women have to teach men to be friends with them. It hasn't worked for me. Gaskin is right on this.
As soon as she said “friends for 15 years” I was like nope, he’s not the one sis. It does not take years for a man to know that you’re the one. I hope she moves on.
Two✌🏽 divorces already and now this balderdash. Maybe I'm speaking for myself, but I can't keep putting my poor heart through the wringer. We gotta heed the warning signs. They're definitely there. A man dealing with multiple women, DON'T care about any of them. Only himself!😔
“Once you know how to ride it you know how to ride ittttt” and “you’re like a candle in the sun” omg lol 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 i can’t take him with all of these faces he be cutting up lol
This story might have some holes like Swiss cheese now ... Tony!! You’re going there. So many women need to hear this. At 20 I was the female friend. We were in undergrad, worked together and lived in the same complex as a result of our jobs. His Gf was in a different city but would always come to see him at his job (our job) - she knew he was a dog in heat . I was naive and really appreciated a male friend for campus escorts , and just genuinely believed we were best friends until the inappropriate comments started. Obviously I kept boundaries but he tried it! And when I shut him down, he dropped his “bestfriend”. These lil boys do what you allow. His girlfriend married him...
This is a fact. I have a girlfriend that was friends with her male bestfriend for over 15 years as well and ended up dealing with him on the side while he was with another women. Telling her all her business and she would come back telling me. I had to cut her off. Things like this may sound crazy but it actually happens!
He's so right straight men don't normally have female friends unless something else is going on. My friend thought she was friends with a guy for 10 years n recently he confessed he has loved her for years smh. Now she still trys to be friends but it's just not possible.
Tony is on point , he’s never been wrong never !we really don’t know men , thought I did until I started listening to Tony I recognized a lot of things immediately.
I’m 24 and I have a guy friend I’ve known since I was 16 and he just recently tried sleeping with me. I had to check play boy real quick “nah it’s not that type of party”
What you allow is what will continue!!! He making a fool outta you and you in yo feelings !! If he knew you was the "one" then he would come in knowing and showing you that! He running game and you need to be running!!!
Yep... and if it’s not his baby, this woman needs to run. Because if he’s trying to do all that for a woman that’s pregnant with another man’s baby, then he definitely is in love with that woman.
I wish she hadn't got on her back so soon 🤦🏾♀️cause she's created a stronger soul tie with this man and its setting up to be like a competition between the two ladies for this man's attention (ya'll know how some of us are🙄) It would have been ideal to have peeped his situo from the jump and told him "yeah you handle all that over there and I might or might not be over here when you, her and the baby figure stuff out." I can't do drama no more, especially drama that's not of my own making. God Bless her
Merry go round you don’t know him just because y’all knew each other yeaarrrssss ago...give yourself time to heal...moving too fast & doing too much too soon
😂 😂 TONY U ARE NEVER LYING! Men are really untrustworthy like that. I got these type of questions all the time. Still do and I haven’t done nothing! Lbs a woman can be modest, abstinent, God fearing and just to herself and he will still question and be a bit possessive lbvs TONY HAD ME BUSSING UP ON 27:17. Be blessed ❤️
