Shirley Lawson I'm a big fan of Andrew Mellen and his 'Unstuff Your Life' book. He uses this quote too. There's another one about 'later being the step-child of someday'.
Love this! Someday had my girlfriend holding onto throwaway foil pans for 3 years. I was like..They cost a few dollars, you haven't needed them and if you need them, I will buy more. She finally gave in.
for many people, this is the manifestation of a serious psychological issue, and not simply disorganization or laziness. My partner of 40 years has one such issue, which stems from her mother denying her literally everything she wanted, and even food sometimes, in a monstrous effort to control her life. So when she got out on her own, she'd buy gross quantities of everything. If she needed one of something, she'd buy dozens of that item, and more every time it was on sale...things laid in the bags they were purchased in for literally years with the receipts and often, even the change from the cashier still in the unopened bag... My point being; there is a mindset which precedes the manifestation itself which first needs to be addressed, rather than just showing someone how to organize. Otherwise, they will lapse back into the exact same situation a short time down the road.
Agreed!! Beginning hoarding “treatment” with sorting & organization is like treating an alcoholic by having them move all their bottles to a higher shelf and then shaming them when they reach for them. Both approaches are ineffective at best and potentially harmful to the person and their recovery. Thanks for saying something raj lippy!
I immensely agree with this winter is the best time to prep for yardsale spring weather--although almost every house could use decluttering/thorough cleaning each season.:)
Watermelon Tea Time first, love your name! Second, great comment to declutter in winter. It's the perfect excuse to not have to leave the house for any reason when its so cold out, and you stay warm cause you're hustling to get your space tidy. 😉
I follow a home cleaning system called Fly Lady. When I find I am slacking off, I watch a few episodes of Hoarders and it really helps me to get back to where I want to be: in control of my own home! Thank you, Erica!
Okay, real talk: It actually is a good idea to keep an orange or yellow safety vest in your car. This is because you might have a need to walk a few miles along a dangerous stretch of road (if you run out of gas, or another situation), and that vest can literally save your life.
Hoarding is sometimes due to financial insecurity. If you have items that you don’t use but think you might in the future then you might hang on to it...if you feel like you can’t afford to replace it. Ask me how I know.
I have the goat trail. My problem is I hate to waste items that cam be used. I was raised to not waste and it's really impacted me. My mom and grandmother have too many items also.
@@phoenix9999 well best way is if have more than one gadgets best keep the one works and you like the most or if never used gadget donate it to Goodwill/ salvation army come off your taxes. Clothes if turn hangers opposite way then when grab for one when hang back from cleaning you can see what you love for each season. Keep in mind keep simple black/ burgundy dress if don't really wear one for /date night/wedding/ wedding anniversary/funerals.
Katherine Canon Thank you for the great advice, I implemented that years ago and I have and continue to reduce clothes effectively. The extra stuff are books, pictures, and crafting items. I have several books l need to read before I can donate them. The crafts and pictures is what I'm stuck with. The crafts there are no craft thrift shop to donate to and I am stuck with the option to throw them away and I can't. The pictures I wish I could upload to my computer but I don't have time.
27 years ago, a necklace I owned broke, and I put it aside with the intent to fix it SOME DAY. People have told me quite a few times over the years to throw it out, because "some day" would never come. Last year, I fixed it at long last, because I'd finally come across a product that could do the trick (Sugru), and it made me feel SO good. I've used it several times since, and it's made me happy every time. I love that necklace as much as ever, and it's wonderful to have it back in use. I'm glad I never gave up on it. So to me, "some day" is valid. Sorry. :D
Hoarding is about trying to fill an empty hole one has inside which cannot be filled with 'stuff' IMO - no matter how hard or how long you try. Deal with the empty hole inside.
Yes, only nice life experiences make the void fill itself. I tried it with stuff, and it totally failed. For example, i dont miss my former possessions, but i miss my happy experiences. Thats the mentality to overcome the void problem.
I have health issues which slow me down more every year and so time is very important to me and I hate wasting it looking for things. I decided to make a spreadsheet of the locations of every item I own. It took a couple of days to do. Now I can search the spreadsheet in seconds and find anything. This is especially useful for planning future projects. Also, I can now take a leisurely look at items on the spreadsheet and decide whether or not I really need them.
A few tips I've thought of that really helps me now as I'm about to turn 55 in June. Did I receive this as a gift from someone who really cared about or out of obligation? If I saw this in a store would I buy it now? Does it fit? Do I like it? Does it have a good memory or bad one? What's my lifestyle now & what do I want to do in the future? Can I afford to replace it in the next year if it breaks? Does it actually make my life easier? Do I want someone after I die to own it? Would someone after I die really want it? Here's some biggies. Do I want to pack it and move it to a new location? Do I want to pay someone to pack it and move it to a new location? Remember the more you have the more time it takes, the bigger the truck you/they need, the more help you/they need and the more $$$$$$ it's going to cost you no matter how you move. Ask similar types of questions. I've never bought into if I haven't used or wore something in a year get rid of it. I think it's more important to ask yourself why? Maybe you got sick, lost a job, a loved one died, have an operation, etc. Are you looking to entertain more, go out more, etc. I want to make doing everyday living easier. If I have lotion, tissues, nail files, scissors, etc. in every room I'm really happy. I don't want to have always go somewhere else to get items I use frequently. It's about making life easier whether it's cleaning, convenience, etc. I'm for that. I believe in stocking up for all those reasons of I get sick, lose a job, have an operation, sat in CICU for almost 2 weeks with my mom & then a rehab center for a week and a half, etc. All things that have happened to me or someone in my in the last 10 years. So yes purge, but keep in mind you will have things happen to you that are beyond your control. It's not always easy to replace items when you need to. We have a few smaller boxes of perfectly good items that we don't currently need. However, they are tucked away on the top shelf of a closet or cupboard out of the way for when we do. I'm not going to have the money to replace every little or big thing again. We have quality items not cheaply made products that fall about in a short period of time.
I screen shotted your questions to ask myself 🥰 Lots of people ask questions of hoarders, but they're not the right ones, or not helpful eg does it bring you joy? Is it useful? Is it beautiful? Etc... Yes, but I still need to get rid of a whole load of stuff. Our house is chock-a-block, and it's mostly mine 😳😢
I'm not sure the exact date I wrote this, but was probably the end of May. See my mom died 25 September 2019. After dealing with family who couldn't even reach out (1 of her great granddaughters), siblings who years ago wanted certain things (told her), but really don't want them, & 1 who well let's just say she didn't want to see or talk & hadn't seen since February 1982 now thinking they're entitled to money ( which there is none), & so much more we have dozens of boxes of stuff to sell as soon as we can. The 1 sibling I live with & I are probably going to sell the house. We both want nothing to do with the other 2 siblings. I called the oldest 1 a few years ago while in the emergency room with our mom & she was flat lining & that sibling said they didn't have time to talk. Like wtf?!
I hate the way people kind of judge these people for having this challenge. They just need a helping unjudgmental hand, and to be taught skills afterward.
But some of these people are just slobs. Plain, old-fashioned slobs. When some people have literal garbage (fast food bags, empty soda bottles, etc.), real trash that just needs to go out to the curb each week, and they don't take it, then what's that reason?
John Stuart Mill thank you for sharing and your honesty. For a moment I slipped into non interest because I disliked where I lived. Also, my collection of crafts got out of hand. Sooo... I purged and felt better. If I don't NEED it, I do not buy.
I tried the picture on the shoe box thing. Spent a lot of time taking pics, printing, putting the labels on the new see thru shoe boxes, etc. I used this for a couple of years and found it demanded too much time to keep it going. I threw it all out a couple of months ago and bought a large (about 2’ x 12”) three drawer container-black shoes on bottom, brown in the middle, and others in top drawer. I have another flat, open, container (the size of a Christmas ornaments box) that I use to hold the shoes that I wear often. This takes very little time in day to day usage. I like it much better and it takes up less room than all the individual boxes!
Yeah, I completely dismissed her idea the minute I saw it. NO WAY would I put my shoes back in their box;. Much more likely that I'd just stick them in the closet, PROMISING myself I'd put a pair back in its box "later". Good for you though that you did it for a whole two years. I'd be lucky to have done it for even two days....
I used to be a hoarder but over a bit of time, I've got it down to one room and that has a door I can close. I was never floor to ceiling hoarder but I would put up barriers to get into rooms due to the years of my brother coming into my room to beat me up. Now, I have someone who loves me and it makes so much difference. I want to do better because of him. I want him to come to my home and feel safe!
Decluttering is a life time process. Not something to be done once and then you're good. That's not realistic. My Grandma was a pro at this and she constantly decluttered yearly. Her home was always very organized, minimal stuff, if she wasn't using it anymore then it would go out. She was trendy so always shopping so things were changing and going with the flow of her experiences and life. Some people have a hard time letting go of old things while consistently bringing in new things and that's when problems can accumulate. Stuff overload.
My parents were children during the Depression and raised me with the notion that there could always be a use for something that you might throw out. I feel that is my impediment to decluttering which is reached severe proportions by the time I'm 68 years old!
KM Krieger. I know, I think that way too but then I realized hanging on to stuff someone else could use is selfish. I'm over 50. I keep thinking of young mother's who could use my stuff. Once I packed up a bunch of good stuff and put on my neighbors porch. Later I found out she was grateful and could use it all.
Same here. I ask myself the question ... do you really think you'll need it since you haven't needed yet (I'm a few years younger than you)? It makes it easier to get rid of lots of things -- excess holiday decorations, kitchenware, old clothes that are out of style anyway, extra furniture. I also now ask myself .. if something happened to your health and you had to move into a smaller place, would you need/want/take this? It gets easier the more you do it ... like building any routine like exercise, studying, etc. I try to do some decluttering every day and if not every few days. I ALWAYS make a pass through the house the night before garbage pickup to look for items not even worth donating. Every little bit and every little effort helps over time. You could also check out flylady's website. Her system helped me immensely. It is a lifetime process because we are always acquiring things and our needs are changing, especially as we age.
Your parents were very right about what they were doing. The difference is that you didn't live like your parents. You lived in prosperous era of our times and unlike your parents you kept the things you acquired while you were (at least often) acquiring more and more. So your parents kept what they had because they would take care of it, repurpose it and probably never have multiples of it. I assume you spent way more that your parents did, so here, there are 2 problems. Wrong purchasing decisions and lack of efficiency in your acquired items.
It took me about THREE years to realize that I was great at buying containers, baskets, etc., in order to use them to organize, but I realized I just had a ton of empty containers, etc. and was never quite getting around to actually organizing and USING them. I realized that merely purchasing them made me feel like I was accomplishing something. Didn't help that I like shopping. Did buy all containers at Dollar Tree or another "dollar' store, so wasn't breaking the bank in buying, but still, having a supply of empty containers of various types was not helping my problem at all. So, my question before I bought any more became "Are you going to use this to organize anything TODAY?". If it was no, I didn't buy it. After all, it' not as if it was my last chance to buy any of these. They'll be in the stores whenever I decide to USE them.
Haha, i have the same 'organizer' obsession. Now im organizing my home A to Z and i use my various organizers everywhere but it turns out, i thought i needed a lot more than whats actually necessary and im gonna be left with a lot of excess organizers when im done organizing. Well, im gonna use the excesses while organizing mom's home but i feel guilty for going overboard with them in the first place. I think i romanticize getting organized just too much while shopping around lol.
Having a worm farm is incredibly beneficial to gardening. Most all gardeners would appreciate this. I understand your function is to assist hoarders yet try to understand 'why' vs your immediate judgement. My home is 'neat' and I have 3 worms of the same worms this man did.
Yes, but can't you keep your worm buckets OUTSIDE? I'm assuming you brought your worms INSIDE (if they're in your house) from the OUTSIDE... worms definitely can exist OUTSIDE in their natural state. Cultivating worm shit INSIDE your house, is a problem.
Unless you have a massive production, which most gardeners do not, the standard way to produce them is in Rubbermaid totes, pre-made worm farms or plastic bins. Everyone I know who harvests Vermicast has their worm farms indoors. It's much too hot outside to raise worms unless you're doing it in something the size of bathtubs or old cattle farm troughs. Yes, they originally came from the ground, yet to raise a high volume in a small space you must be able to control the ambient temperature. The way they were raising them is standard procedure. Take a moment and search RU-vid and you will find, unless they are a commercial worm farm this is absolutely normal. Your lack of knowledge is quite judgemental.
Vermiculture doesn't emit a bad odor if maintained properly. Millions of very clean, respectable people around the world maintain worm bins in their homes...living rooms...even KITCHENS. It's apparent many people would rather condemn them rather than educate themselves regarding the benefits versus how 'icky' or 'dirty' they assume you'd have to be to have one. Placing judgment on something you are making assumptions about versus attempting to gain knowledge about is simply showing prejudice. By the way, those 'smelly, dirty worms' are in the very soil you get your food from. Oh my! Hippocrite. ..... smh
Susie Que - He had those great worms in his living room...on the floor(?). They are good things but they needed to be put in a better spot. "Like with like."
Why not just buy a bright orange or yellow car and stand on the other side of it...? That's what I do. Its 4,200 lbs. Can't say "I didn't see it..." lol
@@zippittydoohdangtwang In Germany, you also have to have a first aid kit that has not yet expired (good for about 4 years) and orange reflective triangles. Yo need these items in your car for your car to pass inspection.
The reason people like Hoarders the TV show is because 1. People are fascinating and 2. People genuinely love to see people overcome and rise above their issues. This is why I think the majority of people are good. Shows like this just prove it. We all want to see one another do well, even if we don't always admit it.
But it severely damages the people that are hoarding. Scientific studies shows that when you force people to clean stuff out and do it for them, that they just return to living that way. I find these shows to be very condescending. I guess all other people can see is the clean house at the end. They always used to end almost every show by telling you how the person involved quit going to therapy after the show. That should be a warning sign for how terrible these shows are. Almost every person in the early shows quit therapy
@temps I think these shows make me sad because to be honest these people are so beyond rehabilitation. They seem like the past of no return. All it does is give me an urgency in my own life to throw away things and never ever let myself become attached to junk that these people are hoarding.
I struggle with this, my home is in a constant flux between something you'd see on hoarders, and a normal home. It takes constant vigilance to keep up on the organization, decluttering, and cleaning.
I understand what you're saying. I think if you get rid of stuff periodically, you're not a hoarder. I got rid of a ton of unneeded stuff after reading this book: tidyingup.com/books/the-life-changing-magic-of-tidying-up-hc
Sunflower Susan I know experts say to get things out of the house immediately, but some recommend to store the item in like the basement or garage for 3-6 months to see if you’ll need it. Then throw it away if you didn’t need it for that time
In My own experience: I found out afer years of strugling to keep my house clean and organized that when I decluttered a lot a lot a lot of stuff, now it's so much easier to stay on the top of things, even with large family
Wow revolutionary! My years of hoarding have been cured because she introduced me to label makers and spice racks. It’s amazing no one ever thought to tell me about these before ....
I admire the man who keeps the plants. It takes a lot of love and dedication to nurture plants. It's wrong to suggest that nurturing plants is an illness.
@@theupwardspiral1580 Try corn plants. They eventually turn into trees, but they like very low light and only need water once a week. Don't like to be replanted, even. I've seen them growing in stadium bathrooms. Non-toxic to dogs. Use a bowl with the dog's old water that you can fill up or fishtank water works, too.
Orange safety vests are great for walking the dog at night or to put in your vehicle in case of emergency. Sorry not a hoarder but my boyfriend is in construction and he goes to work very early in the am. Every morning he would see an elderly woman walking her dog in the dark. He said it was really hard to see her and he was worried she would end up getting hit by a car. He was afraid to stop by her in the morning because he didn't want to scare her but everyday for weeks he was troubled by this. One morning he finally stopped her during her morning walk to tell her that no one can see her and he gave her one of his safety vests so she is visible to traffic when walking her dog. She was very appreciative. He's a big sweet guy :)
last year I de cluttered my kitchen. Donated all the things that i had double (and even triple) of, and the things that I have not used in forever. In that mess, I found a ice pic, which was my mom's & dads before they passed away, which I hardly ever used. Well, I donated that, even though I was second guessing it. Now this week, I have needed an ice pick! And also I am regretting getting rid of mine because it was also my mom & dads....made out of steel. I believe that it was purchased in the 1950's. I now feel that was a stupid thing to do!! Since then I have also donated other things which I have found that I needed after it had been donated. So now I don't believe what everyone says about needing to get rid of things declutter.
These two ladies were very sweet and funny. I think that people who clutter have experienced traumatic loss and there is a sense of powerlessness associated with this loss or abandonment. As a result of thier trauma there is an overwhelming fear that if something happens they will not have what they need or it will be discontinued with no suitable replacement so they hold on to things. The most powerful thing you can do if you struggle with clutter like I do is to accept that the Most High God will always fill you up if you let him and he will give you everything you need. I am a work in progress and still need to get in the habit of letting go but mentally this is what I tell myself.
Definitely, and know that the Most High isn't limited so ask HIM for success in reaching your goals - at whatever stage you are in your striving. He doesn't get tired of us asking or showing our weaknesses to HIM. Wishing you every success, keep striving 👟👟👟
My mother is an extreme hoarder and I struggle with hoarding although not nearly as bad as my mother. For me the thought process is “what if I need it someday?” The reason for this though is fueled by poverty. When you’re poor you can’t just go out and buy what you need whenever you need it so it’s hard to get rid of something that you MIGHT have a need for in the future. I have a very difficult time throwing out a useful item even if I don’t have a use for it at the moment. It’s a constant struggle but I’m slowly learning to let go of my anxiety about not having what I may need someday.
Hoarding is really a function of the ability to accumulate beyond one's real needs. There hasn't ever been such a thing in societies where excesses of material things were not the norm.
Geoff look into a ceremony called the Potlatch. This is when (historically) NW coast tribe hosts a giveaway as an act of power by making, accumulating and gathering huge amounts of resources and giving it to the group being honored even at the expense of your own people. In doing so, the giver gains power and status. Eventually the transfer of wealth must be reciprocated.
Yes, our brains have not evolved to cope with superfluous stuff (or food). Throughout the history of mankind we needed to gather as much as we could to be the ones that survived. Our primitive brains still tell us to do so.
In the words of the immortal Robert DeNiro, "Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner".
I have pets, and frankly, if I had to walk out of my house tomorrow, I'd just take my purse and them. Wouldn't give a second thought to anything else I have. And, no, I'm not a hoarder; I just have a problem with organization.
I'm truly thinking of drastically changing my life, as in TINY HOME. It would force me to get rid of the stuff. The thought of that kind of freedom is refreshing, as well as a little frightening.
My mom and brother are hoarders living together. My brother is now dying and I believe this hoarding has something to do with it and my elderly mother still refuses to allow me to clean or help in any way. It's heartbreaking.
The part of loss as a trigger is so true! I'm not exactly a clinical hoarder(because before our lives drastically changed I'd always clear out out grown clothes/toys 2x yr) but I will tell you when we got hit after hit financially on top of life threatening illnesses x2 family members because we had barely enough $ to eat & house our family we held on to items in good shape for simple reason of replacement for items we could not spend $ on...but we are in the ardjous process of cleaning out all the clutter and starting over...the good thing is we are aware of this and don't like clutter so hopefully that's a good sign because we are ready for a zen environment! Clutter causes stress I feel if you can't go into any room in your home with out feeling smothered by clutter it's time to clear it out!
Just watched the episode of Hoaders that Erica DiMiele talked about. This program usually gives me great anxiety. This episode with Mr. Kerry and his family was different. I applaud your effort Erica in the restoration of a life and a family!
Organizing shelves, cabinets, drawers -- shoe boxes do it all! Wrap them in contact paper and they're waterproof. I always keep a few on hand. They are also good for mailing items and for putting presents in.
What you need to buy before cleaning out a hoard, is a mask and disposable gloves. Often there is much deferred maintenance, leaks and toxic molds. Give the hoarder vitamin B6, to take 20 minutes before needing to sort. It works.
What she said about something that triggers the hoarding, a loss, a conflict, etc. is true. And hoarding stuff is like pushing the emotions deeper instead of releasing them. The way through grief is to grieve, and then to let go. The way through conflict is, as much as it depends upon you, to forgive and to let go. You might need help to do this, but when you do, it frees the soul so there is less need to keep the stuff.
Orange safety vests should be worn when walking thru the woods. Non-hunters may not know this, but during hunting season, if you are not wearing orange or bright red, you may be mistaken for an animal by a trigger happy inexperienced hunter. During hunting season, many get accidentally shot but it’s rarely reported. Also, if you become injured or lost, the vest can be seen from far away and the likelihood of getting rescued increases by 10x. Since I live near the woods, I keep vests on hand for my family and friends when they go hiking or hunting. Yes, they get used, but are kept with the rest of my hunting gear.
In 2003 I was diagnosed with MS. Before that, I was a "neat freak", and kept my home in tip shape, as a kid I was kinda messy, but got better as I got older. I blame my MS for robbing me of my clean-up, and organization skills, my fatique is ridiculous at times. I do take medication, and vitamins do help, but not enough.
Nikki" Geez, if you have MS, I can't see that ANYONE would criticize you for having a messy house. If I was your friend, I'd talk to you about me coming over about once a week and doing a little cleaning, tidying. AND, I'd be most interested in doing the tasks that would make YOU feel better having them done than doing anything that would impress visitors. YOUR comfort in your home would be what counted. My guess is that anyone who knows you and knows you have MS is NOT judging you as far as how good a house-keeper you are. My best to you. No doubt that you are an incredibly brave woman.
My favorite way to clean is to rearrange everything. Everything on the right side goes to the left and vice versa. I manage to get rid of lots of stuff in the process.
I love the picture of the shoes idea ! I'm going to do this especially for my 3 kids ages 6-13 . With all of their after school sports shoes, regular "play shoes" or casual one, I waste so much time looking around .. They often have to explain to me what they look like too, so this will help !! Such a great idea and time saver .
Why not require your kids to find their own shoes? Why is it your job? Sorry, but I see so many parents nowadays "waiting" on their children as if what their child wants is paramount. Tell your kids that it's up to them to find their own shoes, and if they miss a sporting event because they can't, oh well. That will teach them to plan ahead. Even a 6 yr old is quite capable of finding his/her shoes.
I had to clear my mums house when she passed away, it looked neat but the storage areas were full, enought glasses, plates for three families, plastic bags, jars, cookware etc. it took me two months. Now I am declattering my own home and I am amazed at how things accumulate. When I go to the shops and see a lot of nice things I am mindful and restrain myself, I dont buy anything unless something breaks and needs to be replaced.
See, this is one of those things where the 'experts' didn't do right by the poor guy! I would have said, "How about, let's get rid of the dead ones and you can keep the live ones!?!", and continue on encouraging him to make confident decisions! 😺
Too many plants my arse, no such thing. And where's he supposed to get his worm castings now that they dumped them in the yard? Booooo another reason I dont watch shows like that :'( I'm surprised she didn't say the fish needed to be flushed!
cherrish roseberry-cornell oh my gosh - the dead cats on some of these episodes!! So sad to see those. Animals are so sensitive to their surroundings. 😔
Alternative View: Even tho I'm not a hoarder, I've been thru "The Purge" stage. Only to years later, on multiple occasions, looking for something that I NEEDED and remembered having. Then remembering that I purged it. Had to run out and spend more money on an item I had gotten at a cheaper price three years or more ago but stupidly threw out all for the theory of purging.
Rusty Bell Well, I wouldn't stop getting rid of stuff because of one item. For one thing, I know things have gotten too messy when I start losing things in the clutter.
It has been numerous times this has happened to me, not just once. Also, I am very organized so everything has a place - no piles. All are in labeled containers on shelves, etc. Mostly, I wanted to offer a different view and since my family were mild-hoarders (ergo, my penchant for being so organized) I know some of their way of thinking.
Needing something that was tossed WILL happen occasionally. It's not a problem you need to feel stupid or beat up on yourself about. I like Stephanie Winston's take on this. In her book "Getting Organized", she wrote: "If, as sometimes happens, you find you want a replacement for a particular item that has been discarded, consider the money well spent in exchange for functional closets." Another reasonable attitude is the one expressed by The Minimalists, that you can safely toss anything you could replace in less than twenty minutes for less than $20. Your particular threshold of pain may be lower, but select it, stick to it, and don't fret the occasional repurchase.
Friends ask why I have stuff stacked on floors; I learned as a kid that my parents & brother's won't go through my drawers if the stuff is already on the floor. Plus, I don't get hit because I could navigate much easier than them.
My mother was a "keeper." We sorted her out many times over her life. She went to a care home at the age of 93. She was admitted with a suitcase and one tub of items. After three years as a resident, her room was stuffed with items. Where she got the stuff???? ....here and there. When she passed it took two carloads and a pickup to clear her room. Relief is what I felt when she passed. Dealing with her metal illness was so draining.
The pandemic is actually giving me an urge to buy. I'm bored, feel isolated, and have an urge to buy items that interest me, as they give a comfortable feeling and give me something to do and look forward to. I like to decorate the house and buy collectibles/antiques and nice furniture. I'm pretty much out of space to put things without having some in storage. On the other hand, I'm 62.5 years old and somewhat wonder if I'm going to be stuck with (or leave my wife stuck with) a bunch of items to dispose of. I don't look at these possessions the same way as I did when I was young...that "I'm going to live forever" feel. I'm starting to sense my mortality, yet hope I can enjoy my things for well into the future, but who knows. I just have to reign-it in at this point.
@@FaithsStardust Big rise in ebay prices since mid 2020 and decline in investment portfolio and some home improvement and medical expenses put the breaks on my spending. Not seeing really quality items at estate sales unlike a few years ago....no idea why. Out of room anyway. Feeling more at ease since vaccines became available, so less need for comfort items, food, etc.....
Many of my extra things I got rid of I don't even remember what they were lol. That's a good thing! Plus I tend to buy too many of the same object but doing better on not doing it.
A man who hoards 300 plants? Nothing wrong with wanting to live in a botanical garden :p exept for the effort and time it must be to keep all those alive!
Depends. I used to work in the cube next to a plant hoarder. She finally got told by the boss to get rid of the greenery when gnats took over the office...
@@kell_checks_in Well she obviously was not very knowledgeable about plant care. Fungus gnats occur from the top of the soil remaining damp for prolonged periods. A little vermiculite dusted across the top of the soil would have avoided that problem to begin with. As well as letting plants dry out completely between waterings.
God bless you! For helping others. My problem is when I organize I don't put things back consistently. I have been better about giving things up. Like I use to have 8 tanks with Betta fish because I felt bad for them... But now I have only two and will keep to this.
I think I’m becoming a hoarder because either I wanna keep everything because it’s “memories” or I feel like I’m “gonna” use it one day... im gonna do a big spring clean tomorrow and get rid of everything I don’t need.. it’s to much
Before you start putting things into boxes and organizing, get rid of stiff you don't need, you don't use, you don't want. Downsize your stuff... And yes, the teared spice rack helps a lot, so you don't have to take everything out to get that one jar in the back....
Well what the? Someone hocking a label maker and clear shoe boxes? Seriously, this is so ridiculous. My mother is a hoarder and I find it difficult to manage my environment too ...and when I see an 'expert' recommending MORE CRAP I am very disappointed. I made the mistake of getting about ten of those stupid boxes about 15 years ago (yeah, hello,old news) but if you have TOO MANY DAMN SHOES then it's not about the boxes! I am always searching for real help and even the most basic beginner Minimalist has more to offer than these recommendations. This host is rather patronizing too. Okay, that's my rant ... the woman, Erica, seems to be a kind person when dealing with the hoarders which I like.
You're describing 2 different problems. A cluttered home is a result of two factors. Too much stuff or too little space. The first has to do with excess items that you don't need or like or items that you can't access anymore. The second with has to do with having a small home for your lifestyle or your home having lack of an effective organizational scheme taht efficiently uses up as much space as provided. So the solution goes as follows: keep only things you use and like based on your lifestyle and things that if you need you can't wait to acquire (emergency items). Then be mindful of what you are buying, why and how much it will cost after having it in your life (maintenance, storage etc). More over downsize your life to fit your home in cases you can't move out. Really the items we really need are very few. No need for 8 plates 20 forks or 40 decoration items and so on. Last but not least make the most out of your space with hollow furniture, drawers under your clothes in your closet, cabinets and shelfs etc. Useful tip is to capitalise second hand shops, friends to borrow items from and shops that rent equipment for things you need occasionally.
@3DogMom most people have excess of belongings without being hoarders or have mental issues relating to that. The fact that my views don't help the few people who need medical help, doesn't mean that it's not helpful or interesting to the rest. Also, mental illness as a reason for hoarding doesn't make common sense (aka my views previously) crap, rather insufficient. These points still hold true but for certain people it's not the hoarding the problem but the consequence. Last but not least i don't see you offering any service to any side, so why don't you apply your recommendation to yourself first.
There's NO such thing as "too many shoes." Anyone doesn't like it, don't come over, then. lol. There's at least 4 full seasons where I live. My stuff is paid for and I don't owe anything to anyone. I like it better than I do most people. It's all clean and I know where it is.
I did know I had a "hoarding" problem until I had to move out of my apartment and carry all my "stuff" to my new location. First step to fix something is to recognize it. Then take appropriate action.
Hoarders should be treated with respect and compassion. You never see happy wealthy people hoarding..lts suffering downtrodden folks who are lonely afraid and unhappy...and maybe have ADD or a difficult condition
Exactly. My grandparents had to make it through the Depression. They hoarded because of true economic scarcity and the need to be resourceful and to use an item possibly in multiple ways. Then these ideas got passed down to my parents, and ultimately to me as well. It's extremely tough. But yes: Compassion is almost always at least part of the answer, for any problem.
I have a pretty nasty case of ADHD. The only thing that prevents me from having a bare bones minimalist household is my neurotypical partner. I long for a perfectly neat and organized home, and my condition hasn't prevented me from reducing my own things. But I can't throw his things out. ADHD is a disease of interest and stimulation. It could make hoarding worse, but it won't cause hoarding. Just sayin'...
I've found using a labeling machine just complicates it if you're just starting out trying to get organized. I just use index cards or 8.5 x 11 inch paper and a pen or sharpie. Just print the contents on the index card orpaper. Then, I scotch-top the label to the box. If I ever get to the point that I'm really organized, THEN I might "fine-tune" it by putting printed labels on things. "Keep it simple" works for me.
The beginning of the end of my hoarding was when I started putting things in their allocated spaces. I also started recycling. I got rid of every cardboard box in the problem area. I stopped reading every bit of paper and just filed them all in 3 desk drawers: work, home, social. Hope this helps someone. I'm starting to get rid of a lot of expired stuff. I only put in my wardrobe clothes that fit and I'd be comfortable wearing out. Repairing my sloping drawers was a great help too. Also dumping stuff from school, college and uni except certificates, because I graduated over a decade ago
Put the safety vests in your trunk. If your car breaks down at night and you're standing on the side of the road waiting for help to arrive, a reflective vest will help you to be visible to other cars.
I started getting rid of old books and felt a great sense of loss. A part of my past is gone forever. I have to continue this task and it's going to hurt. These people aren't talking about the pain people feel when they let a part of themselves go.
Before I donated any of my books, I made sure to scan them into an app called Book Buddy so I have a record of them. I also made sure to keep only my favorites, or any that were no longer in print. I also only donated only to places that were worthy of my books. Never to Goodwill.
I wonder if it is the generation who went without most needed items in the Great Depression , which taught the next few generations to keep and use everything...I saw my Grandma scrape and scrape the cookie dough bowl to get every last smudge ...and I see my daughter throw out 1/2 a cup or more at the bottom of the bowl...and it drives me nuts ! to see her waste ...but almost everyone now has MORE than they need ..
Right, more of what we don't need and less of what we actually need. Basic necessities are not being met (skyrocketing homeless population due to increased rent), isolated communities as technology slowly replaces real interactions, no wonder hoarding is such an issue now because people are lonely.
Rachael - I think it’s a great idea! A girl in my dorm was doing a weekly cleaning of her room and found a spiderweb in her shoe. Shoe size storage containers would prevent that from happening to anyone. 🙂
Some people don't have very good handwriting so it looks a lot better especially if you need to label things for work. I mean if you need to have stickers to label things in the first place why not have a label maker?
Fatimah Hussain: I agree with you. They actually sell brand-name storage bins (small ones) at Dollar Trees, why spend more elsewhere if those are the sizes you want? They have many things like seasonal décor that you're going to use for a couple weeks and then you could either choose to store them or donate them away and not lose much money on it...and have fresh new ones each year, still for cheap. They have some things we've used for years, too. It's amazing. On the other hand, I generally don't buy vitamins there, though someone told me they are merely overruns from legitimate companies; if they have a brand name on them, likely they are from those exact companies, often made in the USA, too. I will NOT buy Chinese-made pet food or treats ever due to all the recalls...but there are lots of great deals at Dollar Trees.
@@jilliansmith7123 Dollar Tree is just ICK, like Wal-Mart. See peopleofwalmart.com. I can buy it at Aldi, rent it or live without it. I don't even want to TOUCH anything in those places. Pick up some horrible, incurable cooties there or something. Nasty. Haven't gone to/bought Walmart since 2006 or any cheap icky store like Dollar Tree in several years. :) jmo
If you are de cluttering please think about all the people in Houston who have just lost everything. I don't know yet how to get them to my neighbors and friends but I'll find out or maybe you know. Thanks so much from Houston Texas!
I want to donate a drawer, but I don't have the money nor resources to sent out such a thing over there. I don't know anyone and I live in shitty part of Miami. :/ I will try though, but I'm not making any promises to anyone.
Beth Johnstone One way to send care packages of needed items is to take your reasonably sized packages to your local post office & ask them to send it to the Postmasters Office in that area, along with a small cover letter explaining that it's aid. It's usually for a small reasonable postage but if you check around, your local church may all ready have an aid drive going.
I haven’t seen this episode of Hoarders, but I think they needed to have a plant expert be on hand if they didn’t have one. If this guy had a lot of plants and they were healthy, what’s wrong with that? Build the man a greenhouse and be done with it. Have a place for his three worm barrels in the greenhouse. Then have the rest of the house cleaned up. There. Done.
I have a problem releasing ... what I have fou d to work for me ia to get rid (toss,donate,give away) ONE item a day. At the end of a year you have decluttered 365 items. Easy, peasy.
I resent the chatty way these people approach this horrific, frightening problem. The moderator should have never taken on this program if she couldn't be respectful of the millions of people who have the disorder, live in the mess, and can't recover. Most of the people who are dealing with this can't get the support they need. Most don't have families or friends, which is part of the problem. Don't pretend to understand something you don't. Check out the superior attitudes of most of the people on these videos who are advising the hoarders. Where's the compassion?
I hate these hoarder shows. They are always condescending to the people who hoard. They always tell them how they will respect them etc and then they never do. That's why it ends up being a screaming match.
Yeaaah I’m low key a hoarder. Definitely not as bad as people on the show but I do hoard things. I have clothing all the way from when I was in 9th grade. I am 24 now, I mean every single outfit I bought too. I also hoard small items. My closet definitely reflects hoarders tho. Stuff half way to the top with clothing and purses. The anxiety of getting rid of all that stuff is unbearable. But I am going to do it tomorrow 😄👍🏻 my closet hasn’t been actually used in 5 YEARS. So I have a lot of work to do on it. I don’t actually know why I hoard. It’s not financial struggles. I am fine on that part. I am not attached to them. But I have anxiety to throw them away. I do have major depression but dunno if that plays a part in it. I had so many anxious thoughts of opening my closet. But I finally did it, and now on the steps of just throwing every single thing away. I’ll be throwing most of clothes away and the good shape ones goes to the thrift stores. I know I won’t be able to wear them. And my fashion is mostly just sweat pants and a over size t shirt anyways.
My sister and I were helping our mom to “de clutter” after she retired. We were shocked at how old some of the Rx meds she had in bins, boxes or whatever. She had antibiotics that were for my sister when she had strep throat or something when she was about 10 or 11 yrs old. We started throwing the expired meds out and she started yelling no,no,no don’t throw that away! I might need it someday! Mind you, the meds were from 1968! She kept arguing about it. Both my sister and I have medical backgrounds. These meds, at best, were ineffective, at worst, could be toxic. Mom knew almost as much as we did about meds. I lured mom upstairs to get something to drink, while my sister threw all those expired meds in a garbage bag and snuck out to the trash bin. Fortunately, my sister and I are NOT like that! OMG!!! It was positively daunting!
I became someone that STOPPED being organized when my 2nd husband STOPPED paying attention to me and I am not talking about "occasional" ignoring, I'm talking about NO affection, no taking me places, no complimenting, thought he doesn't have to help with the daily chores, refused to shower daily,(he had the same pair of underwear on for 2 wks the day I asked him to leave).ETC....and got upset when I asked him to leave. Sure, it's been difficult to go through everything I let go....but it had to stop, and I deserve a better life. I would like to figure out HOW I turned off my being a neat organized person and if this could happen to me again and if I should get some therapy or hire someone to come in and tell me what I am doing wrong with my organization now that I am alone. (BTW....my FIRST DH died almost 17 yrs ago. I didn't remarry for 12 yrs.) I am terrified of getting out there again (to date) but I don't want to live alone forever. I am retired (over 60).
Orange safety vests are great for biking, walking, or walking your dog after dark or inclement weather when you are concerned about being visible to others
She's just selling stuff, especially the kind of stuff people buy to use "someday when I get organized." So hoarders can now have a bunch of transparent shoe boxes to throw on top of the heap. I especially like the cheap plastic rack that holds a few vitamin bottles; it probably costs a fraction of a penny to manufacture but she calls it inexpensive at $7.99, a complete ripoff. She's actually selling clutter.
But on the video you say that you use this plastic box system for YOUR shoes....Do you or don't you use this shoe system? And I agree with the poster that says it is a huge waste of space!
I have helped in a clean out of a class 4'hoarding situation....so many totes and bins. Layered into the parfait of crap...and with four cats..literally.
My dad... Was admitted to a skilled nursing home in dec . 2018 and sadly passesd away in SNF... and I'm still. Getting rid of his stuff in May iin 2021... .. Too much clutter from kitchenware, paperwork, tools, applicances, etc.. Lesson learned - I just buy stuff that are edibles .. edibles that go out in my #1 or #2.... Lol
I believe she said she wanted to, not that she actually did. Anyone faced with a task that seems overwhelming has been tempted to just take the drastic approach. When I was working 18 hour days, things piled up to the point I was hoping the fire department would show up and just wash everything out into the yard.
I think many people hold on thinking that they can sell things and feel they are making a bad decision to let things go, like it is a waste. I was amazed to find, when I shifted my belief with intention, that the value actually multiplies if you give it away. I have had many more windfalls of money since I developed the expectation of maximum return for letting things go. I also look at things as not fulfilling their purpose sitting on my shelves or in storage. They need a rightful owner to put them into the use for which they were designed. With clothes, I decided to only dress in a "favorite outfit". Setting that criteria made it so much easier to get rid of questionable old stuff and organizing by outfit instead of by type of clothing makes it easy to open the closet and decide, especially as those outfits I have kept all look great and people don't even notice or care what you wore on another day. When I have the urge to buy something that I have an emotional drive for but do not really need, I now easily say to myself: "I am going to leave this for the person who will be super excited and genuinely need it." Adding the sense of charity makes it effortless.
I look at my cluttered home and fear I am turning into my grandmothers. Then I see pix like these and say to myself "I'm not that bad" then I get really scared that my complacency will be my undoing
I think hoarding has a lot to do with traumatic experiences. When I was growing up I had basic things in my house my father bought me a dresser a bed and on my bed I had a couple of sheets a quilt and a pillowcase and a pillow then in my drawers I had enough underwear for 5 days including songs along with the comb and brush and a little bit of toiletry. I had a small bookcase which would carry about perhaps 15 bucks but basically those books were school books and in my closet I had about 5 tops two pairs of jeans two pairs of shoes runners dress shoes. I had a couple sweaters and a winter coat that was it basically but I spent most of my time outside working or playing or visiting my friends or my friends would come over and I'd play with the animals I had as pets dogs and cats and monkeys. Yes I had three pet monkeys living along the oceanfront in British Columbia Canada. And my girlfriend had a horse and a few cats and dogs so I was content I had no worries my father was making good coin. But having Martha Stewart's upbringing did a number on me. Because of the security and the fantasy lifestyle I had growing up as a kid I didn't face the real world. And what I mean by that is my life was sheltered. In the sixties life was so different than it is nowadays. We had a garden which was totally organic. And there was a lot of money coming in the house. Mom would spend about $600 a month just for fun. My father was a carpenter and built beautiful homes for rich people that lived in British Columbia. So let's just say life was a breeze but tragedy hit me pretty hard. all the money my mom had you think she'd be really happy. But that wasn't the case because when I was 17 years old she took her life in front of me. I was devastated and had a bit of a nervous breakdown to say the least. And then three years later my dad died of a brain aneurysm. I had no brothers and sisters. When my father died I went to the lawyer to get papers signed and the lawyer what's the executor of the estate and was making me sign papers I didn't really quite understand but I got him to explain it to me and I trusted him because as he said to me if your father didn't trust me he wouldn't have me as the executor of the estate. What I was doing was selling my soul. See lawyer got me to sign everything over to him. I was only about 20 at the time and I had nobody but I knew in the town but he was working in his office I had no advocate so he took everything and I ended up on the street with a nervous breakdown. So if we fast forward 50 years here I am. I'm during that. Of 50 years I became a hoarder. So for me or eating was due to a loss. And now I'm getting to become a minimalist just like the way I was brought up and I'm preferring having basic necessities over having too much. I don't think we were created to be greedy and to have an excessive amount of material things. I do admit that hoarding was just a cover-up for the lack of love after I lost both parents. It's all psychological No I want to travel instead of buying material things which I wish I didn't do for the last 50 years because all the material things I had are gone. I have a mattress that I had put on the floor and since it's only me that lives in the house I only have one cup one spoon one life one of everything. I'm slowly getting rid of my cookbook addiction. And I'm thinking to myself am I going to cook all these things of course I have to be realistic we don't need 50 cookbooks. We got the internet And the old saying is just in case I lose something I got a second one sitting around and taking up space My theory on that is just have one of what you need and if you lose it then buy the item because you may have two of everything that you don't need and never end up needing it for 20 years meanwhile you carry it around with you every place you move. No I'm saying we don't have to be like that but for me it gives me peace of mind and I hate handling things over and over. To me that's excessive amount of energy where your energy could be put into other things more productive than handling and tossing things around. I had six blankets I have to now one for the summer and one for the winter. I got rid of all my CD cases and put the CDs in one case. We don't need all that plastic an excessive amount of CDs when you can download it on a smaller device. Vuze is a great place to get free movies and free downloads as long as you don't seed the movie and what I mean by that is once you download the movie or once you download the music stop it right away because if you keep seeding and giving the music freely or the movies free lead to other people then you are charged for doing that. You are allowed to download for your own enjoyment but you're not allowed to feed or give the information to anyone else. I knew some friends that put everything in storage and only kept what they thought they needed. After 3 years of storage they decided to take all the boxes not even open them up and just give it all to the thrift store and they said they never missed a thing and it's been 5 years. They took out everything that they really needed an important photos important papers and just basic necessities and they figured out before they put everything in storage what was important to them so anything that remained in storage for 3 years they didn't miss and they didn't even make an effort to open it up and see what's in there because they were afraid that they would start hoarding again. To me that's pretty drastic. I think the secret of getting rid of things is not to buy storage containers.
