How Can I Decide Who Is to Be My Partner? | Eckhart Tolle Teachings 

Your own essence holds an intelligence within itself. The more you connect with this essence, the more able you are at choosing the right people to engage with. Your soul speaks, and if you learn to resonate more with your soul, then you'll be able to find those who you resonate with too. -Much love from a growing RU-vidr

Love is not just looking into each other eyes but looking the same direction.

'Spend 2 weeks with your parents and then see if you enlightened'..love this🙏🏼❤☀️

I can listen to this guy everyday for the rest of my life and never get tired of his words.

"Real love doesn't make you suffer. How could it?” -ECKHART TOLLE 🙏🏽💜🧡🔥⭐️

Real, true, unconditional love is basically falling in love with yourself. Thats the definition of true love for me.

- I just want to let anyone who’s reading this comment know. I wish you great success, health, love and happiness! ✨

You choose the right partner by humbling yourself and telling God you are in need of one ( and He already knows btw) and asking God to bless you with the right soulmate. Ask Him alone for He has already matched you up but requires you to know that He is in control of everything. You are not.

Unconditional love is loving humanity as it's parent. Tolerance , forgiveness and understanding. Your partner is the person you are drawn to who helps your soul feel in alignment.

““A genuine relationship is one that is not dominated by the ego with its image-making and self-seeking.” - *ECKHART TOLLE* 🙏🏽💜🙌🏽⭐️💫🧡

When I heard my first love story, I started looking for you, not knowing how blind that was. Lovers don't finally meet somewhere, They were in eachother all along. (Rumi)

I embrace everything I am. I release anything that drains me or is causing me suffering. I connect to the divine and know the Universe is always with me, exactly as I am.

Just because you love everyone and everything, doesn’t mean you want to live with it all.

Basically everyone has a different capacity for giving/recieving love that's built into their form. Think of it like a light bulb: 50 watt vs. 100 watt. The unconditional love is the electrical current which we all have in common. The person that you should get into a relationship with, ideally, is someone who shares the same wattage as you, so that you will maintain compatibility while reaching your highest potential. Too often a 70 watt person who's only operating at half of their potential, gets with a 40 watt person operating at their full potential. At first, the 70 watt person will appreciate that person's energy, but as they start to reach their potential, they will outgrow that connection pretty quickly.

To my understanding romantic love is never unconditional, it might be a tool for emotional growth and a speed ticket to enlightenment (especially the difficult ones), but it’s no wonder that authentic spiritual leaders and monks are celibate. They experience oneness, and if you experience that, you don’t need another to make you complete. There is nothing wrong with relationships, if you’re into that. But because of the conditional nature of it it will always leave you ultimately unsatisfied and that generates suffering. Also almost always egos are operating the relationship. That takes away a lot of energy and a lot of time. You can ‘practice’ on every being (just like he mentioned parents), that’s also a good way to grow. I have yet to see a selfless, loving relationship without the involvement of egos and expectations. When it happens, must be really beautiful. But even that doesn’t last forever and attachment also causes suffering. So, to my view relationships are not designed to make us happy and fulfilled, but more to speed up our way to enlightenment, if we only listen to what it wants to teach us.

Once again another video that somehow gets released precisely when i've been thinking of those matters, thank you for this gift.

QUESTION: If let’s say we all love each other unconditionally, how can I decide to which to be my partner? Is this based on physical attraction? Isn’t this a contradiction with this higher state of consciousness? ANSWER: Ok, so if you love everybody unconditionally how can you possibly decide who is going to be your partner? That’s the question. Because it seems and there’s no preference anymore. Or if it’s physical attraction - isn’t there a contradiction, if you’re in a higher state of consciousness where you shouldn’t or not be physically attracted to anybody is that the implication there questioned? Well, the love we are talking about, the unconditional love towards human beings and life forms is a… See, what is it that you love in the other when you love unconditionally? You don’t love their physical form, you don’t love their psychological form, their personality. Their unconditional love goes deeper. It’s a transcendent love, that what you love is not the form, but the formless essence of the other. And you can only love that when you can sense within yourself that dimension of formless when you can be still and present enough and then look at another human being. Then you can recognize something. What you recognize is for lack of a better word the consciousness which is the essence of the other human as it is the essence of who you are - consciousness prior to the consciousness being born into some kind of form, personality which is there in the physical form, which is there. But in every being, there is still the dimension of consciousness that is prior to form. Although the human being has become form, consciousness assumed form has incarnated, so to speak, but that doesn’t mean that the formless and timeless consciousness is lost. It’s still there as the essence. And when you can sense it in yourself, you can sense it, because you are still in presence enough. From that dimension in yourself, you can sense it in the other and that is LOVE. It’s basically a recognition that in essence the other is the same as you. But then of course there is always that is the transcendent dimension to every human being. In addition to that transcendent dimension, there is a form-identity of every human being. Every human being has a physical form and emotional form and a mental form that’s a personality. So the physical appearance and a personality consisting of mental and emotional conditioning and so on. So, there are the two levels. The unconditional love towards all humans is the transcendent love. The love (the formless, [the recognized of formless]) as yourself and the other. But then you’re still here as a form too. And the form may respond to another form - the physical, that can be physical attraction. It is not incompatible with the transcendent realization although some ancient or not so ancient traditions may tell you that. It is not incompatible you can have physical attraction on the level of form. You can also have an attraction towards the mental-emotional form of that other human being because it resonates with something in your own form. So that means you may be drowned to the other human being physically or mentally, emotionally, because you resonate with that. And then perhaps you enter into a relationship. So there different levels operate - the transcendent remains. It can become obscure through excessive attachment of course to the mental-emotional dimension in the other. So in a relationship, the realization of essence identity (as I sometimes call it) can become obscured when form identity takes over completely, which could happen through the pain body. Which could happen through emotional (getting identified with arising emotions and losing touch with the transcendent). Yes, that can happen, but it’s not incompatible. Everybody’s challenge is to balance the two in their lives in their relationships to relate to the other on the transcendent level and at the same time if it is there on an emotional-mental-physical level. Without the transcendent dimension in the relationship, it’s not ultimately satisfying and it cannot really truly work for long if the transcendent is missing completely in the relationship. Its physical attraction and attraction between personalities is not enough to keep it going. Can be going for a while, but then it becomes frustrating and you see more and more of the limitations of the other person. And the other person sees more and more of your limitations. Which are always there and when you live together it becomes very obvious that the other person has his or her limitations. Now as long as the realization of the transcendent dimension is there and that fine, there’s also limitations can be exist within the space of the transcendent. They’re not destructive of the relationship. Now you may find it’s sometimes easier to have this unconditional love towards people that you don’t know so well than people easier than towards people that with whom you shell a lot of past. Because there the past the form identity of that person can be very powerfully there in your mind in your interaction. So that’s the challenge of being present with family members: parents, grownup children, and so on. And of course, as you know Ram Dass recommends if you think you’re enlightened as a test he recommends that you spend two weeks with your parents and that will tell you whether you’re really enlightened or not - going spend two weeks staying with your parents for two weeks. In most cases that is a good test, unless your parents are enlightened in which case there’s not much point in using it doesn’t tell you anything.

A few days ago, I spent an afternoon with my mother. I failed the enlightenment test miserably. 😊

Whoever is reading this May all your dreams come true 🤗

I'm in a weird situation with a man... I think I love him, but I don't know if this thing we have is actually healthy, or really just another trauma bond. I need prayers. Him and I both do, that whatever this is between us, will ultimately be for our own healing. And that we will co-create something that is loving and magical and beautiful and happy and wonderful and miraculous and healthy, together... Love and/or friendship to last lifetimes...

Here's hoping everyone that reads this finds their partner and can connect emotionally, physically, mentally, spiritually and finds compatibility and balance and awareness and understanding and love and happiness.

Letting go of expectations held on eachother makes way to an authentic, heart to heart, flourishing relationship.

The unconditional love I believe is a grace, recognition and acceptance of all, but not everyone we love is meant to be in our lives.

Thank you very much, Eckhart! I want to tell my experience, because it can be helpful for someone: Seven months ago, I started a relashionship with a very good and kind man. I only felt for him the transcendent love that I feel for every human, nothing more. I though that I should ignore the fact that I did not have physical attraction and the "in love feeling", because I wanted to be racional and choose a good man. Unfortunally, it was a big mistake. Now, I realize that I'm only with him because I wanted to be part of a kind and sucessful relashionship, so, it was a egoic choice. The lesson I learned from my actions is that it's okay to consider my body sensations when I choose someone, I'm not "less enlightened" when I do this. I'm just human.

You and your partner have chosen each other in the spirit world before incarnating into the earth this time around for the purpose of soul growth. You may have more than one partner at different stages of your life all divinely planned. 💕 just remember to be kind and have fun.

Wow. Imagine a world where both of my parents are Enlightened, as well as my grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. That would be GRAND. 😊✨🌟

One of the ways to feel positiv*e energy is to take your attention away from the negative and focus on everything that transmits positivity to you. Have a beautiful day! 💜💜💜

Taking care of aging parents was extremely difficult and rewarding. It brought me to my knees and shattered my life, but when I look back I can only see peace in my life now. They are no longer alive and I wouldn’t want my children to go through the same thing.

I just had to tell you this. I fell into the fear trap again so I watched Milton's Secret with my daughter, we both found our way back to the Present. We both are so grateful for all you do to help us rise when we forget and become heavy with what is not real.

I beleive that unconditional love is beyond physical attraction, you love someone as an existence, just because she\he just is a human being..✌️💖🙌

Love this guy. He's the best. 👌🏻

This guy's blink rate is off the charts. Super freaky, I'm freaking out. Try to keep up, blink every time he does. What is going on ???

I like the comment at the end, "think you're enlightened? Sped 2 weeks with your parents." I feel the same way, but a little different. Think you're enlightened? Spend your entire career on a psych unit. Lol.

Analyzing it to pieces...love just is. Trying to explain it is to extract the life out of it. Eckhart Tolle or not.

Make the reality you want be blessed by you instead of you being blessed by it. In other words how can you become the person that enriches the reality you want, so it needs you rather than you needing it. 💜 Heart-Based Manifestation RU-vidr

While married to a narcissist, I experienced enlightened awareness. Soon afterwards I felt I needed to leave the marriage & be on my own. Unfortunately for myself I stayed & the utopian peaceful experience lasted only several months. It's something I'll never forget. The details of the experience such as perfect alignment with synchronistic events that occurred very often daily. How quickly each day passed. How each person I was in conversation with, was at ease with me, & i could feel the relaxed air between us which was natural & beautiful, some of them I'd known for years. How information from within would be there instantly as I needed it & this is the supreme intelligence within us all that we're born with & how I naturally saw everyone as my equal & the love for everyone is a peaceful love. Pure acceptance & It's not that I needed to say anything to anyone about it, My energy was non threatening & peaceful & that is real Love. If someone had asked me that question that eckhart tried to answer. I would say that it comes naturally because when we're living by our true nature, everything is natural.

As I read the comments, wording doesn't even comprehend what is felt. The love just is. The "I love you" is never even spoken. It's just there. Satori is a glimpse into oneness. Satori can also be felt by your true love which is really you in another form.

If you want to know if you're enlightened, go spend 2 weeks with your parents. :) That's comedy gold right there. 😂

Omg does he know how funny he is… love the dry humor in between the wisdom😄

Often when i'm just being present, waves of energy goes throught my body when i trigger em, i dont know exactly how I do, but everytime i get big goosebumps from the energy waving. I have to be very still and rooted in the moment for it to happen

i need to be able to be conscious like you it seems so effortless watching you just sit so calm 🤣

I was enlightened of what Love IS NOT whilst spending 18+ years with my parents 😅

Only love your kids unconditionally, is my advice. Hold everyone to a standard of respecting you, as you respect them.

Well if I love everybody unconditionally then just take one ...... why not the one you are attracted to physically ? Why not the one with money ? Why not the famous one ? OR are you lying to yourself ? Is your ego running the show whilst you claim to have gotten rid of it to become enlightened? My advice is as always : just make sure you are not motivated by fear !!!!

I've listened to a few of his speeches and tbh, I don't understand a word of what he's getting at.

I wish everyone who reads this comment a beautiful day 🍀

What we know and what we learn are two different things...

Can someone please explain what he means by spend two weeks with your parents? What exactly is the test?

I LOVE to listen to you Mr Tolle 🍃💙🍃

Some things are beyond explanations - this may be one of them

unconditional love still includes conditions

You don't decide, you just know..

this dude was 100% a sloth in previous lifetime

Decide, choose....let things happen

Love does not only unite Love also severs and separates

Romantic love cannot be unconditional, otherwise there wouldn’t be any difference with loving a family member. Romantic love is conditional and that’s what makes it special. It’s never carved in stone.

Every time I hear one of my associates/friends say, “I love you” when they’re on the phone or otherwise, I always ask them if they’ve ever told that person why/how that is true. The response is usually the same…they draw a blank. Or….he/she already knows….It’s implied. Well…no it’s not. Try it sometime and watch the response from your significant other or whomever.

I was following a spiritual path having given away the majority of my material wealth and severed a relationship that was a mistake. At age 45 I had resolved to remain single when without asking the Master Jesus shows up mid day in a vision and says he has someone whom I should meet and shows me this young woman who would compliment me. Two days later she arrives at a seminar that i am leading and knows me at first sight, Neither of us had never met the other. I was educated and trained as a CPA and considered a partnership as a great responsibility. I will turn 75 in two days and have enjoyed a relationship of mutual respect and trust and friendship with all of the collateral benefits based upon truth

For someone to be asking that question, it's probably not the question you really need to be asking.

Very true. However I feel it applies as much towards animals and all life forms, yet they are unlike us.

To those who are/have been living with their parents whilst going through this transition towards enlightenment - I hear you. I see you!

Unconditional love only exists between owners & pets!

The person has limits, but the transcendent aspect is Infinite. Familiarity breeds contempt.

every cell of my being: saturated in grief. (How to escape the intensity of such pain, such agony, such torment?)

By recognizing the oneness in the other and wanting to share that with them in Being.

I'm pretty sure he's talking about twin flame journey.

pure love and i love your video. I just met the man i love and it feels different than anything i had before, imagine its when u had your 2nd partner. its an instant understanding that is not based on a direct physical attraction, its rather on a whole body, mind, spirit and of course both are attracted. its transcendental. we even did not get intimate for 7 dates. and it feels not like anything i had before and i am old and had many partners haha

I'm learning to breathe more because i hold my breathe alot it started because of abuse but as i have gotten older it has gotten worse and now I'm conscious of it I'm trying to learn to breathe more and become conscious more to stop the anxiety but honestly think I'm failing i can sit for hours in silence and my mind just goes crazy im like what the lol

My goodness Echart we are on the edg of destruction, and your focusing on relationships ...get a grip man

The main driving force is unconditional love, but because we ARE in these specific vessels with this specific mind, we will feel attachment and attraction to those that we love unconditionally. Correct? Balance is the key to a healthy, lasting partnership with another transcended being. Both being aware of their "essence" (as you put it - enlightened), is necessary for there to be a true experience of unconditional love. . . right? Anyways, bless you. And thank you for what you do. I'm still on a journey to finding balance. But I know I will get to where I need to be. It is a matter of time.

I always fast forward and end early to avoid the dings 😂

I love your Form and mind, heart and PEACE+Wisdom Eckhart !

unconditional love doesen't mean you agree with everything, you do not have to like everything, we are ONE in diversity, unconditional love comes from the ONE we are, the more you are aligned with the One , the more unconditional love you have for all, so if someone does something that hurts you badly, you forgive instead of hate them because you know that the core of that person is the same as you, do mind that forgiving a person who did something "wrong" is not the same as accepting the wrong doing. Unconditional is what you/we are

Stay on your own path (in the light), it"s already written(stars). You radiate (=attract) what you are on in the present moment. I am.. all that is.

Vielen herzlichen Dank fürs erinnern mein Lieber 😀 Was sagst du zur Lichtwelle die von heute bis zum 21. von den weißen Räten jetzt für uns aufgebaut wird? Es würde mehr Menschen erreichen wenn es deine Nachricht auch auf deutsch gäbe! Es gibt nur eine Liebe; bedingungslose Liebe. Alles andere ist ein Deal, keine Liebe!

He has just explained the true definition of love❤

The comments section is full of drivel...

My test would be my older, narcissistic (clinically diagnosed), violent sister. She was 7 years older than me and beat me up a lot. She was 20 the last time she pounded me. She died 14 years ago and I still miss her. She crossed into the Light and is being taken care of by our mother. I would love to have 2 more weeks with her here on earth.

Love isn’t attachment…. I use to feel attached to them…. There is no love there…

If all is energy, and then you fall in love with the same energy reflecting back, either I accept the reflection of my energy or not? Sometimes ppl "play you back" mirror You to feed off your energy..and feed you with Your energy.. Usually at the beginning of a relationship. Once you've shared space and time.. Then the shadows start to emerge, your own and the counterpart. How well one live with one's own shadow..? That's what I got listening to this 🤗

Eckhart, can you please elaborate on what a transcendent dimension in a relationship looks like?

Unconditional love between grown-ups is ultimate new age B.S. Unconditional love for grown-ups means even if your partner f*cks around, you will still love unconditionally. This is sick AF.

Make subtitles for different languages, please. Russian would be nice.

Please further explain the staying with your parents bit. I just recently stayed with my parents for four months… that was eye opening to say the least.

9:05 "the problem of Trump being with family members" ?

We are all capable of unconditional love. But somehow, within the family nucleus or in relationships, we become less capable of expressing or living in unconditional love. This is because somewhere, somehow, the idea of ownership arises. We start to feel entitled to the life of another. As if we own them or we own rights over their lives. We soon want to change the others in our own image. So that they can see life through our own eyes. We end up chaining others as well as chaining ourselves. The human need to control is what ultimately causes all of this. What we forget is that secretly we are looking for OURSELVES in others and when this does not happen or ceases to happen, we feel disappointed. NO ONE is ever going to fulfil more than one or two of your needs at any given time. And when those needs change (and they always do!) you are back to square one. The solution: work on your inner self-fulfillment so that you stop expecting it to come from anywhere outside of yourself.

His talking about twinflames one soul, divided into two bodies 😏

What's a good example of transcendence within a relationship? Having a hard time understanding that..

Brilliant talk, however in the real world actual money has become the deciding factor. Sad but true.

At 53 I am not sure if I will ever find a conscious enough Life Companion to share the rest of my Life with. That would be great if he found me.

What a load of mumbo jumbo.

🌈Dankeschön 🙏für das interessante Video .🧚🏾

Ohh man!! My dog taught me or we taught each other. This formless state with each other. I then met this in another person very briefly. I know I shouldn’t cling but I wouldn’t mind him coming into my life again🙏

Eckhart's videos never fail to relax me

I feel very Drawn to You Eckhart.and feel silly laughing but I very much enjoy "your company", ALL I hear and see..

You are not to decide anything. Get rid of you.

If it was all about me choosing a partner, it would be Sandra Bullock but I don't think it's as simple as me just asking her !

In general, I don't trust "spiritual leaders" of any kind--priests, rabbis, gurus, New Age garbage-spewers, etc.. And my inclination is still to take Eckhart Tolle with a grain of salt--there is no human being who can tell me what my relationship with the divine (or whatever you want to call it) should be like--that's for me to learn through grace. However, both Tolle and Alan Watts HAVE SENSES OF HUMOR. That tells me that their egos are not overly involved in what they're trying to convey, and it tells me that they're intelligent and open-minded, and may be worth listening to as I find my own path. If you can make me laugh (2 weeks with your parents/enlightenment had both my son and myself laughing--apparently my son is enlightened! :) ), I trust you more and give more credence to what you say. And what Mr. Tolle says actually DOES resonate with me,--so far, no absurd dogma based on man-made ideas as to what is truly "spiritual" living, no "Listen to me--I have it all figured out and no one else does and if you don't do as I say you're lost" BS. I definitely don't need or want a guru--I can create my own relationship with God--but sometimes it helps just to listen to what others who have thought/felt deeply on these things, and who don't seem to take themselves too seriously, have to say. And now, at 61, after having decided that celibacy and solitude is the only way to go for me, I'm starting to fall in love with a man with whom I've been friends for 35 years, and trying to figure out what to do with my strong physical attraction to him, without losing my focus and all that I've been gifted with spiritually over the past years. It seems to be a tightrope walk...

Without the unconscious choosing, we can choose more consciously and find compatibility. Our conscience wants to do good things for the world, and our conscience knows who can help us to achieve that.

Yes lights just came back on.Electric is back...batt is 77% Thank you