For the worrying before sleeping part: If you are not a big fan of journalling, or get scared because you think that means you have to write down pages like writing a novel, what works for me is also just always having a pen and a paper sheet next to my bed. And if I have a worrying thought coming to my mind I just write it down and tell myself that this way I will remember it tomorrow and can worry and come up with solutions the next day. Its just one phrase/word!Not a whole article or anything close to that....quickly done with a great outcome :-) Maybe it works for some of you as well!
a bit late, but how I journal is rather than write down just the date I write down the time. So I could be in class and freak out about something so I'd write the time in my journal and write down a sentence or two about whats bothering me. You just write what you what when you want. It doesn't even have to be cohesive.
The best thing I have found to calm my anxiety at night is to lay down and read a book that I have read a million times for about 10 minutes. After that I lay down and I imagine different scenarios from tv shows,books, or movies and imagine that I am in that world. Takes me about 20 minutes to fall asleep but I dont have panic attacks at night anymore.
It's more imagination stuff, but for everyday anxieties that pester me at night...okay, I've never said this out loud, and I know it's going to sound silly. But I picture stuffing each anxiety into a box...and then into a locked metal box. And then into a giant warehouse sort of building with multiple, complicated locked doors. Point is, I take a lot of time picturing these things getting locked up. And then I picture myself on a cloud tethered to the building, because even though I'm trying to distance myself, they're still part of me. Anyway, the latter part is just because I find the thought of sleeping on a cloud to be comforting. :P The general boxing-up bit tends to help, though! It might just be that all the thought effort of putting everything in all those boxes is enough to put me to sleep, though...
I do kind of the same thing I but all my fears and bad thoughts of what could happen but the in a dumpster then I see myself on a super high building throwing into the deepest lake in the world and think it won’t happen it won’t happen then I fell calm and go to sleep!
I think I like that I am a sensitive person, but sometimes it's honestly ueber difficult and hard to deal with. I tend to take things the wrong way rather easily (though I've gotten way better about this) and I take nearly everything to heart. I over-think situations probably way too much sometimes and think about all the ways one thing I said or didn't say to someone affected them/the situation. I think I might just vlog about this because I have so much to say on the topic lol.
I have a lot of problems sleeping, because I need to distract constantly, but when I go to bed, I can't stop thinking. It doesn't matter how tired I am, I just can't. So I don't want to go to bed, so I go really late u.u I'll try the journal thing, thank you!
I think this should blow up , all your videos get seen more. Ive been watching you for some time now however I had no idea you've been doing youtube for 7years + . A big thank you from me to you😊🙂
I appreciated the part on sensitivity. I’ve been bullied by my toxic family my whole life for being a sensitive person and grew up with self-loathing because of it.
For the sleeping part: I suffer from depression, and I used/still sometimes use to exhaust myself watching movies until very late into the night. Like until almost morning, so that when I go to sleep the only thing left to do, for my mind, is to shut down immediately. But obviously this caused my sleep to be all over the place in terms of duration, reversing night and day, being always drained of energies even if I slept through the day.. (I don't have a job right now). Now that I am trying to set back my sleep into a more normal pattern to have more functional days I still go to bed late because I am a night person, but not too late, and I take melatonin to speed falling into sleep without giving my mind too much time to think, and in the meantime I watch ASMR videos on the phone. The two things go very well together, I must say, I manage to get to sleep in 20-30 minutes without falling prey of bad thoughts and actually relaxing a lot. There still are some bad nights though, but I have to say that I too have a habit to build up stories in my mind to get it off other thoughts and I try to go to these when I see that it's "going the wrong way". Usually I try to be very detailed, I go over the same situation over and over and re-tell it to myself as to improve it until it's just like I wanted it, then I move onto another situation to let the story proceed, and I keep going like this, as in a series that unfolds in episodes that I can pick up the next nights. I've been doing this for years and years, even before I began having trouble getting to sleep because of bad thoughts. It's like I first enjoy myself a bit imagining things, and then bore myself to death refining them, and it really works :)
I try to think of positive things to being into dreams . And always sleep with a fan on can't sleep without it!! Here's to positive dreams and restful nights!!
Kati, Your videos make me feel like I'm not a crazy fuck up. Your videos help me so much and make me feel like there is hope for me out there. Thank you for all you do, Aubrey
First time subscriber, I am ADHD and have LD as well, I'm 37 and was in out of therapy when i was younger, havent been it therapy in a while now! but want to say your videos have helped me! anyhow! with sleep, i make myself think of peaceful times in my life! like someone loving me and holding me! something conferring!
Hello I found your videos tonight and I just called a depression hotline for the first time.I feel much better and I just wanted to thank you for everything I might not be completely healed but I think I won't have the nightmares tonight and I might be able to sleep 😌 It might not be a big accomplishment but it's a start I'm going to try to get better thank you so much for everything.
When I'm nervous before bed (pretty much every night), I try to say the rosary. Or some people just say the Hail Mary over and over. Sometimes people use their mala beads and say a mantra with each bead. Anything repetitive and reassuring seems to help a lot.
something i do at night when i’m having trouble falling asleep because i think too much at night is to just make up stories , kind of like how Kati said she plans out her dreams . i’ll just create characters in my head and pretend like i’m making my own movie or TV show however i want it to be , and it’s like i can watch it before i go to sleep . and usually while it’s all playing out in my head , i’ll just drift right off to sleep without even realizing it . it really helps . :)
Being a sensitive person can be so hard and I sometimes wish that I could be bold and jump in to confrontations with both feet. Instead I am timid and stress out over a lot of things and make them bigger then they should be. But with that said, I am a nurse and I sometimes feel such a tenderness and concern for my patients. I think that some of them are appreciative of that. I also try to watch out for the under dogs and the new nurses and the housekeepers and the ignored. I know what it feels like to be misunderstood or ignored and I really want to ease the pain of some of them and sincerely show them appreciation and patience. Thanks for this vlog. I really enjoyed it. Also, Happy Birthday wonderful girl. I really appreciate you!
I have problems with frequent waking during the night. I use Insight Timer with headphones, listening to guided meditation. I also have a daily journal practice. Thank you for your kind thoughts. 🤗
Problems with falling asleep is what interests me a lot! I love your idea of keeping a journal where you can write down the worries that are on your mind! And I'd like to share my way of getting calm and empty minded in bed - it's ASMR audios and videos. Basically it's quiet random sounds like whisper or tapping, which give you tingles and relaxations. There are tons of youtubers making such videos, so you can always have a new treat for every night.
I find reliving my best memories helps. Eg I go through my wedding day from start and never get to the end before I'm asleep. I also use guided muscle relaxation which is great. Teachers taught me this back when I was in my last year of high school. Very useful!
I find nights the hardest too, sometimes as I try to get to sleep I distract myself by running through the next day positively. I go through what I will do and what good things could happen x
a distraction I used at night when I would wake up at night with racing thoughts was to put on headphones and listen to music as I fall asleep and when I wake up I focus real hard on the music and try my hardest to not let thoughts get a hold of me and that really helped
What helps me is taking a hot shower, drink some chamomile tea and journaling helps too. If you're like me and u have muscle tension, I like to stretch a bit before I go to bed it helps relax my body, hot pads on my back helps too ...hope this helps someone out there :)
what has helped me is, if you are someone who needs noise and don't want a too quiet place to sleep, invest in a noisemaker, also try using heavy blankets that really help to sleep better
I do the same thing to help myself sleep (plan out my dreams). I told my friend to try it once though and she said she couldn't because she doesn't have a good imagination when it comes to making up stories, so we came up with the idea that she plan out her dream house and go through each room decorating it as she goes. She said it works for her and I've tried it too and found it really helpful.
When i try to go to sleep i also plan out my dreams and think about stuff i would like to think about. I also use oils such as lavender, ect, in an oil burner which really helps to calm me down and stop palpitations.
Being sensitive isn't bad,it's difficult.I have been a very sensitive and intuitive person since I was a small child.Many people I have come into contact with have said "you're too sensitive"..It's like they can't understand how I feel things so powerfully and intensely,while I can't understand their insensitivity.I just don't understand how someone could hurt someone else and have their conscience not nag them.I would say that the majority of people in this world are insensitive (some sociopathic lol) and us sensitive folk are the minority.We are hidden gems just waiting to be discovered!! :)
Audio Books. I find factual books work for me as it doesn't matter if you drift in and out - but it gives my brain something to focus on. People say you learn whilst you sleep but I can testify that this is NOT the case :) I still can't remember which King or Queen came when. But it's good to keep trying.
Hello Kati, thank you so much for all your advices. I liked your videos. You transmit an amazing positive energy and I am trying to learn from you because you're a great person and professional. A hug from Buenos Aires.
What helps me with "Bad thoughts" or when I just dont feel that happy is before bed I will listen to some inspiring music or watch an inspiring video!(:
For the second question, everyone should try ASMR videos on youtube. These videos are specifically made to help people relax before bed and it makes the person watching the video fall asleep much faster than they otherwise would have. Good Luck everyone!
Chuck, not exactly. It is for lonely people, that part is true. It creates a false feeling of intimacy, you feel safe and cared for. But it gets addicting. And I figured it is actually isolating you and making you very passive about trying to get intimacy from opposite sex in real life. So, if you want a real girlfriend, you've got to leave your ASMR girlfriend(s).
I watch massage videos on RU-vid and knocks me out really quick. Sometimes even during the video is stil playing. Point is it helps me got to sleep without a worry in thought.
I have a lot of trouble at night, just shutting my brain off. What I tend to do is put on a movie I know by heart so I won't be tempted to watch it. I lay there and listen to the movie and see it in my head and just focus on that and it really helps by keeping my mind just busy enough if that makes sense.
I know this is an older video but I was looking up other videos and found yours about confidence and self esteem. I saw this one as one of your videos after watching those on the up next and I too have been having a hard time sleeping due to bad thoughts which make me restless. I will definitely try the methods of writing in a journal because I started that recently for other negative things in my life and it's helped. Also, for that quote, it's by Steve Maraboli (In case no one has said so yet) “Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don't.” It's a good one and I was curious to who said it.
I think what you were looking for is "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference". It's called the Serenity Prayer. :)
What if you’re a sensitive person but also struggle with empathy or people skills? I’m in the autism spectrum and I tend to be more of a thinker than a feeler. I’m extremely emotional but I have the worst bedside manner and lack the emotional intuition or maturity to anticipate what others might feel. So while I accept that sensitivity is a valuable trait for many people, I can’t see how it would work out for me. Maybe being sensitive forces me to be more introspective?
I'm in a DBT program, and I find that filling out my diary card in bed helps me fall asleep. If, after doing that, I'm still not sleepy, I do the homework I'm assigned each week until I can't hold my eyes open any longer.
I create and control my dreams, its called lucid dreaming its an ability ive allways had, being aware your in a dream takes away all fear an i can even change my dream to suit me. There is ways to help people try to do it but Im not sure it's somthing everybody can do. Try watching a film you like on low volume as you try to sleep or reading your favroute book and read it again in your head an picture it as you try to sleep.
I’ve struggled sleeping most my life for countless reasons and in many different ways right now I’m struggling to sleep because someone I love has been saying stuff to me or about me to me and I take it to heart I have the lowest self esteem right now and think all things bad about me to the extreme and I think whatever it is they say is true and how no one could ever truly love me or want me and I don’t know how it will work knowing I’m not enough in ways or have all this baggage I think because all these things even small adds up so I don’t see any other way and get so depressed because I don’t have anything else holding me up and it feels like I’m living a lie sometimes because if someone isn’t fully content or mostly content with me and can overlook whatever how will it work for me in general and that shit eats me up because I questions myself like what the hell am I doing I get in this existential mindset too or just want someone to save me or be there how I want I just don’t know what to do I want to sleep so bad I always need to run the fan in the background and sometimes they will call me and hearing them snore I can sleep but if we have a disagreement over something before and go sleep I just can’t till it’s resolved idk why it’s obsessive almost I have ocd and adhd and struggled with insomnia my whole life so idk of it has to do with that but just too much I can’t sleep because I stay up thinking bout it and get upset if things aren’t okay or go down rabbit whole of bad thoughts and wanting to not exist in the universe
I use the radio to distract my mind at night. I turn the volume down so low i can barely hear it. That way i have to concentrate to hear the music and this gets my mind away from the negative thoughts.
"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference." ~ AA Serenity Prayer
I mess with my cats when I cant sleep like petting them and playing with them. I also watch RU-vid in the dark mostly things that are relaxing. Reading helps too.
R.e. sleeping I would strongly advise long up ASMR videos on RU-vid, might seem a bit odd at first but even if you don't get the feeling they describe they are really relaxing and help a lot of people sleep. My favourites are MassageASMR and TheWaterWhispers. Pretty sure Dmitri and Ilse have videos explaining ASMR too if you search their channels.
I know they say technology is bad for falling asleep, but I need it to sleep. My head doesn't shut up, even sometimes when I'm listening to something else. So generally when I start trying to sleep, I listen to RU-vidrs. I DON'T watch it. I listen to it. I cover the screen. And if listening to a RU-vidr doesn't work, I have a playlist of lullabies, or listening to a Secret Garden playlist, or if it's really bad and I really need help relaxing, guided meditation. The worst nights are when we lose internet. Then the only thing I could possibly do is bring the CD player to my room and listen to Don Francisco (not that any of you know who he is). I wonder if I have that thing that makes it hard to sleep?
#KatiFAQ Miss Kati Hi I'm Bob I'm 60 in 2020 i was a cuter for years i discovered for me if i take control of my surroundings with people i not longer am afraid of them and in return i know longer cut, the trick in taking control of my surroundings is i look people in the eye and greet people that come in my space "good morning " or "hi" "what's up" i have so much confidence my family and friends like my a lot better. I know this isn't for everyone but I see it if one person can fine hope in this it's worth it. Senserly Bob from Michigan
Do you have any tips for responding to people who tell you you are too sensitive. My parents say that to me a lot, especially after they have said something that hurts me and I try to stand up for myself. Sometimes I say, well its not a crime! But it doesn't help me feel better about what they said. At least its better than just being quiet when they are hurtful.
Good news, the vast majority of trees used for paper comes from tree farms. Think of it like potatoes, if people stopped eating potatoes, they'd stop growing them. Same with tree farm trees. We're not running out of trees due to paper products. In fact there's been a surplus of them since the 1970s. So use all the paper you want, it's good for the economy.