How Do I Tell My Husband I’m Not Attracted to Him?

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How Do I Tell My Husband I’m Not Attracted to Him?
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10 ноя 2022

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@SwimSweetie100 Год назад

There’s something not right if it’s been YEARS and you are still obsessing about his ex partner. Go to a good therapist, you are destroying your marriage about a past he cannot change. This is an insecurity thing.

@starlingswallow Год назад

I agree but it's amazing the things we believe about ourselves because of what our parents said to us, about us. Therapy, yes. Talking to our spouses, yes. ❤

@Aubz47 Год назад

It’s so strange, in some denominations of Christianity, there are beliefs and teachings that insinuate that if you have premarital sex, you are cheating on your spouse. I’m not sure if this is the case here but it almost sounds like she feels that way. That teaching and way of thought is so damaging. It’s a scare tactic and just causes more shame and trauma. I really hope she can do some therapy to get to the bottom of this insecurity!

@LisaLisaCJ Год назад

@@Aubz47 yes and that you have a soul tie to them none of which to ME are biblical

@Nah-ah Год назад

@@Aubz47 I agree! That’s exactly how it sounded like, she feels like she had been hard done by bc he had another woman before her and she holds that against him and she’s probably disgusted by him, couple that with postpartum hormones, and an already unhealthy relationship with her body.

@josephinenelan4204 Год назад

@@Aubz47 this is what I was taught, and then marrying an unbeliever because the men in the church were… extremely lacking… in numbers and character. It can really hurt a relationship! You can never win in some denominations if you’re a woman, and the fact that some of these churches don’t address that is disgusting and hurting. Women are worthless if they’re unmarried and worthless because they weren’t worth waiting for. Wtf kind of messaging is that?

@cathy7824 Год назад

I dated a guy who studdered. He was embarrassed by it, I thought it was the sexiest thing ever. We love different things about different people.

@paulo7507 Год назад

what is studdered??????

@rithvikmuthyalapati9754 Год назад

@@paulo7507 Stuttering

@Raminakai Год назад

I agree that we often try to be " perfect" and lose the sweet unique things that make us special.

@paulo7507 Год назад

@@rithvikmuthyalapati9754 ok i thought as much, just wanted to be sure. I have a stutter also and I dont think women care that much if im being honest as I dont think it has ever affected my interactions with them but then again it is not soo severe

@zeal4god402 Год назад

Woooow a woman who thinks stuttering is sexy. I didn't think it was possible

@randomlady6899 Год назад

I went through a phase when I. wasn’t attracted to my husband but I never told him. Instead I sought individual counselling through my church. Turns out, it’s hard to be attracted to your husband when you’re busy being insecure about your own body.

@dr_pinna543 Год назад

Glad you got help and it was a phase!

@sarahalderman3126 Год назад

Same here…

@robr268 Год назад

That literally makes no sense. I get women want to feel attractive and have insecurities but what does that have to do with your attraction to other people? I'm insecure and feel ugly but I want my spouse! Never understands why she wants me 🤣🤣🤣

@chocolateprincess2656 Год назад

Oh god fir the caller she probably just doesn’t find him sexually attractive…… that’s it. That might of been the reason for you but most women who have body insecurities still know when they find a man attractive or not in fact probably even more

@robr268 Год назад

@Chocolate Princess thank you! Making this a deeper issue is crazy. She clearly states this. And to have most of the comments agree with John is ridiculous. I've learn women are WAY more about looks then men.

@kourtneydouthard-becker1501 Год назад

I immediately knew what the issue was. She thinks his ex was more attractive than her..she's dealing with insecurity..I really pray she gets healed and that her marriage will be stronger 🙏🏼

@liberalmadness7248 Год назад

She’s going to destroy her marriage. I feel bad for her husband. He’s the real victim in this. I dated a woman like this, thank god I didn’t marry her, I almost did. This guy is in a bad situation here!!!

@Consuaser Год назад

When it comes to really bad jealousy the person could even be really unattractive in your opinion and it will stilll make you furious

@mba2ceo Год назад

@tpeters85 Год назад

@@liberalmadness7248she’s also a victim of her mom’s bad parenting. If you think there’s only one victim in this story, you’re missing the point.

@littlelam3691 11 месяцев назад

@@tpeters85he’s a troll

@ChristianOne 10 месяцев назад

I self-sabatoged my first marriage because I felt unworthy of him. What a WASTE!!! Who cares? I should have just decided to focus on GRATITUDE. Whether worthy or not...he was my husband....yay! He wasn't born as a measuring tape of my value. What's super sad is that I kept telling myself that he deserved more so I would set him free to find someone else better. You know who he found? A woman who has abused him for the last 20 years verbally. Turns out, I was a much better partner for him than her but I sabatoged it for both of us. Just be grateful people.

@Gloriagal78 2 месяца назад

Very well said

@ramonaneyrinck2292 Месяц назад

what an amazing comment!

@halwo9363 23 дня назад

How did you sabotage it?

@findyouralpha Год назад

Subconsciously she is feeling inferior because her husband has dramatically improved his appearance by losing 70 lbs while she obviously gained weight after having a baby. This coupled with her self consciousness from her mother is the crux of her problem.

@michealjames5459 Год назад

Spot on

@Dan16673 Год назад

100%

@CrystalM1917 Год назад

She has also likely has issues surrounding purity/virginity but he not coming from a non virginal background...there's some insecurity around that too.

@drew2fast489 Год назад

@@CrystalM1917 What kind of issue would those be?

@CrystalM1917 Год назад

@drew2fast489 She has issues with him having been with someone else before her. It doesn't matter who the ex was. She would feel the same about anyone bc she saved herself for marriage, she likely views sex to be sacred between two married people only. She shouldn't have married him bc she resents him for not being a virgin when they got married.

@rachaelchavez8766 Год назад

Women's sexuality and attraction is very much based on how sexy they feel. In other words if you feel unpretty and unattractive and won't be having good sex.

@purplelove3666 10 месяцев назад

And if they are not attracted to the person(husband)they are having sex with,that won't go great either

@KNByam 8 месяцев назад

@@purplelove3666Both have to play a part in keeping themselves in shape and in the right frame of mind.

@sharonkrzyzanowski2283 5 месяцев назад

That is the truth!!!!

@venM9 4 месяца назад

@@purplelove3666 and the husband knows that she is not into it , 100 percent. He feels it.

@camikazi2737 3 месяца назад

💯💯💯

@kristinmoore4624 Год назад

I feel this in my soul. My mother, although I don't believe she meant any harm, never complimented us but always complimented the other girls in the neighborhood. I still don't feel attractive and hate when my husband compliments me. I tell my daughter how sweet, smart, sassy and pretty she is every day. And my son's how kind, helpful, smart, and handsome they are. I'm overcompensating but they are confident and feel loved so I'm not going to stop.

@spaRKLES88604 Год назад

Words matter. You are a great mom for telling your daughters and sons how special they are. Those kinds of comments last a lifetime. I’m very happy they have a mom like you

@jameskozy7254 Год назад

Your mother probably didn't like herself and you were an extension of her

@asyablake Год назад

@RainbowJam you have serious issues. She said she tells her kids they’re loved and kind. Climb off your high horse because you’re trying to diagnose her children with narcissism from a RU-vid comment? Unwind the stick from your ass because YOUR comment is nuts.

@cookster69 Год назад

just be careful not to give them too much ego, my parents told me I was a genius and I ended up being allergic to working hard to achieve things (since I believed everything would come easy because I learn fast). you sound very sweet and loving so I hope I didn't sound judgemental, my mother was the very same

@lepolhart3242 Год назад

It was a little cruel of your mother to not compliment you like she did the other girls but you can`t let that carry with you throughout your life, you need to let it go and move on. You can`t let what happened to you in childhood let it affect you now as an adult.

@l-train7876 Год назад

9:46 “secrets destroy your relationship far more than being honest.” This is exactly what caused the demise of my previous relationship. My ex wasn’t a bad person (quite the opposite), but he just was so afraid of hard conversations or potential conflict, he would lie by omission. Once I realized that, it made me think that I never really knew what the real story was. It completely eroded the integrity of our connection. So heartbreaking.

@soni05131 Год назад

Similar to my situation. We never had hard conversations, he was dismissive.

@eesynopsis7393 Год назад

Literally just went through this. I broke things off. I had to break my own heart to ironically save it in the end.

@buffalo.blackk Год назад

It’s because you showed him something early on in your relationship that he could not fully trust you. Most modern women can’t actually handle the truth. So, we lie to you. I’ve lied by omission to every woman I’ve been involved w/. It’s just easier. And generally, the women never find out. You’re training your guy how to treat you and how honest he can be w/ you by how you respond to things early on in a relationship.

@l-train7876 Год назад

@@buffalo.blackk if you can’t be honest with your partner then the 2 of you are not compatible. Why waste your time with lies? Honesty and integrity it a core value of mine, as soon as I find out my significant other thinks lying is an option, it’s over.

@buffalo.blackk Год назад

@@l-train7876 Nah, it’s just modern women. Modern women ask, “Do I look fat in this?” “Were you looking at her cleavage?” “Do you want to have sex w/ other women?” “Why did you like that girl’s picture?” “Do you wanna get married?” “Did you think about me while you were away on your work trip?” “Would you still love me if I gained 30 lbs?” “Why don’t you be more vulnerable w/ me?” Et cetera. Lies keep relationships going w/ modern women. I recommend lies to every man if he wants to just have a pleasant evening or a quiet weekend. Just tell her what she wants to hear. Modern women love lies. As men, we’re designed to manage women’s tidal waves of emotions. We’re the rocks that your waves crash into. One way to manage those waves most effectively is w/ lies of omission. Trust me, you want your bf or husband to lie to you.

@aribbonatatime Год назад

News flash for all the ladies out there. There is always a prettier girl so if that makes you insecure then you will always be insecure. Same goes for guys, there's always a richer funnier taller guy out there so if that makes you insecure you're doomed. You're welcome, I'll be here all day 😂

@CrystalM1917 Год назад

You needed to state bigger manhood instead. That's when men really lose it. Which would be much more equivalent to not being as physically attractive for a woman as another woman.

@aribbonatatime Год назад

@@CrystalM1917 What does "bigger manhood" mean if not money, height, and personally?

@CrystalM1917 Год назад

@@aribbonatatime the size of his member.

@aribbonatatime Год назад

@@CrystalM1917 naughty, naughty, you're not meant to be privy to that information until after you're married, then it's too late. Not the case with a woman's appearance. Thus the cause for insecurity. It's always on display for every man to see so "ugly" girls feel insecure. Not an issue with the utensil unless you're going around sampling them in which case you've got bigger problems than insecurity.

@CrystalM1917 Год назад

@@aribbonatatime well when she stated the them being Christians part of things, I sensed her alluding to the fact that they were supposed to be virgins....bc why else would she bring that up in relation to her insecurity...the two had nothing to do with each other particularly except that it sounds like she was a virgin when they married, but HE was not....and I suspect that part is what played into her insecurity with the ex. The reason I picked up on that is bc I remained a virgin until I married as well, and it was very important for me to marry one, otherwise I would have felt insecure about my husband being with someone before we married and wouldn't be able to get it out of my head. Dating someone prettier is one thing but sex is completely another altogether. Now if she had not been one....he likely would have felt that way too, and always questioning was her ex better/larger etc. than he was....and God forbid she had old pics he came across, that would mess with his head in a much more similar way as this has hers...dating in my religion is very benign. you don't kiss, you don't go on dates unchaperoned, and you certainly dont have sex etc. So if my husband had dated a girl more attractive..meh, oh well obviously they broke up..... but if they went to the level of the intimacy that is reserved for husband and wife....yeah I'd struggle with that wholeheartedly.

@vivianivey6663 3 месяца назад

Physical features are not the only thing that attracts people to you. Pretty packaging obviously grabs attention first, but if you don’t bring character and kindness and personality to back it up you’re not going to sustain a relationship.

@lala5061 2 месяца назад

Yep, cuz when a man is insecure and controlling and disrespectful...u no longer even view him physically attractive either if that was all he had...he's just not attractive as a person in character and that's the type of level of not being attracted that is almost impossible to come back from....might as well move on cuz no matter how long u been together someone or both are going to cheat ...it's almost inevitable!

@saloninegi7062 10 месяцев назад

Our mothers really do a number on us! I still can't fathom how much my own mother must hate herself to have been as cruel and narcissistic as she was, and sometimes still is.This poor dear lady. She must have looked very much like her mom, and the mother's self loathing came out.

@ykonratev 5 месяцев назад

Stfu your problems aren't your moms fault what are you 8 years old ? You people are pathetic

@ryandeffley7652 Год назад

The irony is that she claims she's having difficulty feeling attraction to him based on her fearing he's not attracted to her.

@Musicienne-DAB1995 Год назад

Self-fulfilling prophecy.

@leslietarter2096 Месяц назад

Indeed

@toscadonna Год назад

It’s really weird how so many people assume that the person they’re with is constantly thinking about an ex and comparing them. I can promise you that the last person I’d ever want to think about is an ex. Anyone who’s my ex worked very hard for that title, and I’m not one to stand in the way of a man’s hard earned glory. The worst thing is when a guy asks you, “Am I the best you’ve ever had?” As if I want to stop in the middle of s3x and think about some other guy that I wish I’d never met to compare him to you.😂 Thinking about an ex always makes me feel nauseous-like how could I have been so stupid? 😂 So why bring him up now? I’m glad to have escaped and want nothing to do with the past.

@alexdex9439 2 месяца назад

Not all relationships and breakups are the same. Just because you don't feel it doesn't mean others don't.

@virginialangford6257 4 месяца назад

My mother was very pretty and she let me know that I was not blessed with her genes…so be it…I was a homely child and years later I am a homely woman…but I am only here for one go around…so the heck with it…I like my life…I am not a man magnet…but I won’t get a second chance to live life, and I will not wast this one simpering about my misfortunes.

@James_36 2 месяца назад

Your mother sounds absolutely vile - forget her thoughts she is a joke

@michaelfarfan6186 Месяц назад

Good for you🤟 dust yourself off and keep on going👍👍

@JDAfrica Месяц назад

That’s a cruel thing to say to a kid - I’m sorry, no child should ever hear that. That is completely her issue, and you have such character to brush it off.

@gailrobinson3168 23 дня назад

If you think you are homely, you will believe you are. Beauty is always in the eye of the beholder, and not being a paragon of what magazines or Instagram told you is beautiful ‼️Just be your best version of yourself. Pamper yourself and love yourself. You may find there is someone who thinks you are the most beautiful person they've ever met ❣️🤗

@nickalton Год назад

John is dead on! When a man is lying down with his wife, all he’s thinking of his her! No matter how many women he’s been with in the past.

@Flash3-22 Год назад

Actually this is a sweet comment. One I will keep in mind.

@tjay816 3 месяца назад

Thank you for reaffirming that

@YASMINOGBU Год назад

I wonder if her husband over shared about he’s past relationships. I’ve had an ex who did that and it absolutely destroyed our relationship. I’ve never been insecure EVER but knowing how amazing and Intelligent he’s ex was ( as he put it) and having used prostitution - he put it in my head and the comparison naturally arose. It’s immature to speak without thinking the effects on your partner . Some times it’s better to not say any thing then to share everything.

@katiez688 Год назад

I am 100% against talking about past relationships. I think its okay to talk generally about things you have learned from prior life experience but there is no reason to get into detail about specific prior relationships.

@tanyah6184 Год назад

Yes, I think that may have happened. I’m a little bit in that situation, but I struggle with a lot of what she’s talking about too

@yasminogbu8929 Год назад

Yes I agree, with that 🥂

@yasminogbu8929 Год назад

Mmm.. it’s really difficult. Sorry to hear your going through it. It’s not easy. Please stay kind to yourself in the mist of it ❤️ Your doing your best. I wasn’t able to recover from hearing everything, so I don’t blame anyone for not able to over come it. I think it’s our partners duty to make us feel secure. So maybe he needs to work on making you feel like the number 1 lady in his life and that you are the best women he’s had. He really shouldn’t be talking about the ex unless you bring it up really. If he wants to talk through certain aspects of that relationship he should be talking to a therapist not you x

@Whiskey_Jane Год назад

When I saw my ex with a minor after we split. He had said he didnt have a serious girlfriend before and I didnt think about whom he had been with until I had seen it after we had split. Right then he looked like a completely different person. All respect was gone and I was able to get my closure that way. Not values I could live with in a partner honestly. 💔✌

@giovanapc1 Год назад

Dr Delony is such a gift to the world. This is such an important conversation for married couples, with our without kids. Thank you!

@khrisstake2210 Год назад

Gift? He gives awful advice

@jonyoung6405 Год назад

Yaawn...

@karenhultgren7810 9 месяцев назад

@@khrisstake2210disagree

@bluebellcrushedvelvet 5 месяцев назад

What?? I would have never said "a gift to the world" yuck!!! Fking hell he didn't even listen much to what she was feeling and how deep were her problems!! He just basically did what EVERY man does, listens for half a sentence and just botch the whole thing! Smack some generic advice and a symptom onto her and call it a day!!! And he's the greatest?? Lmfao, woooww😊

@zinnia3684 9 дней назад

My mom was super tough on me too and I finally confronted her. She said she didn’t want me to be conceited about my appearance. She did an incredible job, I had very low self esteem. My mom had the problem, and she caused a huge problem for me. I completely felt compassion for my mom and her situation growing up. She only brought to the table what she had. Give it up to God. This was your mother’s burden that you inherited. So sad.

@chelsea7755 Год назад

I feel for this woman. Its really difficult to be super sexually attracted to someone when you're actually numb. I also had a mum that did alot of insecurity projection. Going forward... I think you'd see great benefits from therapy, as well as boosting your self esteem (through physical exercise, mental work and hobbies). Feed your soul, because others didn't when you were younger and you continued that cycle... Destroying yourself. If you don't try to love yourself... And fight for yourself (especially when you have others trying to tear you down), it will haunt you throughout life.

@JDAfrica Месяц назад

Seeing an endocrinologist and sorting out any hormonal imbalances, specifically getting her testosterone levels higher would also be a start. There is a supplement called DIM, which clears the estrogen/testosterone imbalance. DIM supports a ‘good’ healthy estrogen metabolism and reduces the less desirable or ‘bad’ estrogen metabolites. Higher testosterone leads to higher sex drive.

@NnoxLupus Год назад

Honestly it doesn’t matter who she is with, it seems like she will have this problem regardless. The issue is her insecurities. Even if she were to be with someone else, she will run into the same problem until she fixes her own problem.

@sbentsen2714 Год назад

Yeah I completely agree, what I thought of when he was saying why is this a war that you feel you have to fight? It reminded me of myself years ago when I was dating a girl, and thinking about her previous partners it was like I'm fighting against a ghost. How do you win against that? I realized it was because my own insecurities about myself, I didn't feel good about myself or that I measured up. So she probably feels she doesn't measure up to his ex. It's all with her, it's all her stuff. If she works on herself, she can feel better about herself and not worry about his ex

@Nightfighter82 Год назад

Yes she projects them on her partner and them blames them for it so she doesn't have to take any personal responsibility because moder women have been taught that they are not responsible for anything it's a man's fault, patriarchy or some other feminist trope.

@YASMINOGBU Год назад

I wonder if her husband over shared about he’s past relationships. I’ve had an ex who did that and it absolutely destroyed our relationship. I’ve never been insecure EVER but knowing how amazing and Intelligent he’s ex was - as he put it and having used prostitution - he put it in my head and the comparison naturally arose! It’s immature to speak without thinking of the effects on your partner . Being honest without boundaries is just being a child. Some times it’s better to not say any thing then to share everything.

@YASMINOGBU Год назад

Also reading this, if you don’t have children yourself and not married. Learn that marriage is certain though and not a walk in the park. If you get married one day you will realise that. As you can’t teach life experience. Life is complex - people have different experiences , different upbringings - learn to have compassion rather then judging and thinking the worst from women or people ask why are people unsure why are people acting that way and humbly meet it with compassion. Life can be hard for people. Learn to put yourself in peoples shoes. A wife and mother writes below said : Man, sex after having a baby is challenging. I remember being exhausted, touched out, frustrated, etc. Especially after the first child- life completely changes and it's a huge adjustment. I remember thinking of how dirty I would feel if I was intimate with my husband and then went back to lay down and nurse my baby. Thankfully my husband is incredibly patient and understanding

@kellharris2491 Год назад

@@Nightfighter82 That's really harsh. Do you know how many women have hang ups about sex? It's like you don't try to understand what she is feeling at all.

@pinkkfloydd 2 месяца назад

Parents need to stop projecting their self-image insecurities onto their children. It will nearly 100% be a psychological nightmare for the children.

@motogp2375 2 месяца назад

I agree 💯! I tell people don’t ruin it for your child. Your child is innocent and why not set them up for success by breaking that cycle. Your children deserve to make his/her own decision about themselves. Be honest with yourselves and talk to someone about it. Help is out there. There’s always someone out there willing to listen. Prayers for those who are suffering today.

@Nah-ah Год назад

I believe she feels uncomfortable that he lost weight and she’s just had a baby and doesn’t feel confident in herself! “So he must be thinking of his ex when we’re doing it”

@NnoxLupus Год назад

Yes I think so too.

@janelleg597 Год назад

A lot more complicated, people

@CrystalM1917 Год назад

@@janelleg597 exactly.

@CrystalM1917 Год назад

No, she had issues with him not being a virgin when they married. She shouldn't have married him.

@sacredspaceinc Год назад

I don’t think she was using Christianese just nervous, this a sensitive topic. I pray she’ll be healed and their marriage restored.

@josephinenelan4204 Год назад

She sounds scared, she is insecure and he’s bettering himself and she knows there’s a difference between them. Her mom did not help, but now she has to be a big girl and get help. Hopefully she learns the power of communication in a relationship, and good (married) female mentors. Those hormones during and after pregnancy are no joke. Same way BC pill makes you crazy. If her husband loves her, he WILL work with her. Men are incredible at working for what they want, and I have little doubt he wants to have a wonderful and spicy marriage with her. Hopefully she 1) finds something outside of him to affirm her worth, and 2) learns to speak her mind instead hoping for him to get mind reading powers.

@giovanapc1 Год назад

Yes! I think she must feel more insecure because he lost weight and she's probably struggling with her own looks post partum. And then all of those past insecurities come to the forefront. So challenging.

@lt.2992 Год назад

If she’s from a very religious background I doubt she finds any experienced and nuanced mentors. She’s was basically brainwashed to believe in purity/virginity. Doesn’t get any “I’m surrounded by religious nuts” than that

@Rccrdawgs Год назад

She better get it together! Ambitious people don't like boat anchors...psychological or not !

@sarahtucker2874 Год назад

This was SO good. And I feel like what she was talking about is a struggle for many people. My heart broke for her. I am not married but have had those same thought...if I were to ever marry someone who had previously been married. Thank you, John. You've encouraged me!

@YASMINOGBU Год назад

Me too darling ❤️ You have a pure heart. Humans weren’t made to sleep around with loads of people having soul ties everywhere. When two people have had no past relationships to compare it to it’s the best ✨❤️ You will find the best man for you one day, and you won’t feel that way. A lot of the time people can over share and not realise what that does to their partners Xx

@Origin_Stories Год назад

Pathetic....Marriage is about duty not feelings.

@AC-mp7cx Год назад

Your heart broke for her and not him.... bruhg what??

@olganova3058 Год назад

@@AC-mp7cx she's the one sharing her issues on the call, why would her husband be addressed?

@boanddevan4316 Год назад

Hope, I hope you read this... You are beautiful, you are worthy, and you didn't deserve the words of your mother. I hope you find healing! You sound like a beauitful person with a sweet soul!!

@jambajoby32 Год назад

Dang this guy is on it! I hear crazy talk when they jump to conclusions (women, since I date women) & it further fueled the issues. This guy has a way of hearing thru the words & how they’re said

@JJ33438 Год назад

This is a very good video...Dr. John is very compassionate. and he is good at getting at the real problem and the real solution.

@josephbranch2342 Год назад

You did a great job with this caller buddy.

@Lifeszebarbie Год назад

Man, sex after having a baby is challenging. I remember being exhausted, touched out, frustrated, etc. Especially after the first child- life completely changes and it’s a huge adjustment. I remember thinking of how dirty I would feel if I was intimate with my husband and then went back to lay down and nurse my baby. Thankfully my husband is incredibly patient and understanding ❤

@LegacyFarmandHomestead Год назад

This is likely due to high prolactin in your blood due to nursing. It completely kills sex drive in females. It's actually pretty normal and it's also pretty sad for your husband because it's not his fault.

@sarahconner9433 Год назад

I'm a random stranger.... And your really wierd mentally...... Your thought would be valid if you were cheating with someone other than your husband.... But your husband is your babies Daddy!! Your completely fucked up mentally... Get counseling before this great husband cheats on you with a little mexican girl who respects what a wonderful responsible man he is!!!! Good Lord I regret reading your comment on RU-vid.... And I think this is a first!!! Your a cruel wife..... When you find out he has a mistress your punishment will be too forgive him...

@daniellem8790 Год назад

@@TheThugNasty Maybe she was scared to… Seems like you wouldn’t give her the option to say no. Eeek

@ryandeffley7652 Год назад

A husband shouldn't have to be "understanding" or "patient" about a wife withholding sex. If anything he's being too soft on letting you project your issues onto him. 👎 The irony to me has always been that women are the ones drawn to monogamy and commitment. But they're often not capable of keeping up with a man's sexual needs. When you commit to one man in marriage, it's the wife's responsibility to keep him sexually satisfied.

@daniellem8790 Год назад

@@TheThugNasty Haha! Wrong audience. No, as a married woman I completely understand a man’s needs but I also firmly believe a man to be completely and disgustingly selfish if he puts his sexual needs above the mental and physical well-being of his wife… for an orgasm. It’s a two-way street and if a man can’t have compassion and understanding for the woman he married all because he has “needs” (as if she does not???) then that man is not a man but a boy who can’t control his, “needs”.

@themachine9366 3 месяца назад

This is why complimenting your partner consistently is so important. It builds their self-stem and avoids these insecurities and fears from lack of commitment down the road.

@lindseysrouji5229 Год назад

This is a great, honest conversation!

@frankalmanzar3492 Год назад

This reminds me of my current situation because I lost weight. You could tell when a girl doesn’t feel attractive around you. I have dated girls that I felt were out of my league too so I know how that feels!

@Ryan_DeWitt Год назад

So, because you are no longer fat she doesn't find you attractive? If that is the case, it is 100% insecurity, not loss of attraction.

@emmarose6590 Год назад

Yes and a women HAS to feel attractive in order to be physical with a man.

@joelrobert4053 Год назад

@@Ryan_DeWitt What he means is since losing weight, he is more attractive than his girl which will make his girl very insecure since other women and people in general will show him more attention

@caronadams4486 Год назад

Nice job with this!! Felt like I a just had the best therapy session ever.

@blackbeardgoatjr2434 Год назад

This is really great. I must add that every single person must forgive their parents. It is such a relief when you do. It's a hard conversation but if you can do that then you can overcome anything. Nothing will stop you once you forgive.

@sometime.somewhere Год назад

Are you talking about a literal conversation with your parents or figuratively with yourself? Because ive always thought of forgivenes as something internal, especially since the parent may still have those behaviours, may not feel there was any error, or be dead, so in my head I didnt see it as something that needed to be relayed to/received by them when choosing to forgive - what do you think? Im not there yet, but how did it go for you exactly?

@blackbeardgoatjr2434 Год назад

@@sometime.somewhere Literal convo. It was easier than I thought, for myself anyways. My dad actually apologized to me first about leading me in a direction that wasn't right for me because he thougth he was doing the right thing, instead of letting me find my own way in life. So forgiveness there was easy. My mom and I are pretty close and I told her that she's ruining everybodys life in the house but it's okay because she can't help herself (forgive them for they know not what they do) and that I forgive her for that. She then started to deflect on to me and stating my own short commings in life and comparing me to her friends successful children. I didn't mind and it didn't phase me. That was over 1.5 years ago and I've been on my own since, moved out of their house to another state and got a job that I like and can wake up to without distain as a wild land firefighter. I made enough money to take a couple of months off and I just live frugally and keep in shape for the upcoming season. There's this guy named Jesse Lee Peterson on YT and one of his main messages is to forgive your parents and anybody else that you hold resentment towards. He is a character and I cannot state that enough. I agree with about 90% of what he says. One main disagreement is he says that "all thoughts are all lies, all the time" I would say that "Some or most of your thoughts could be deceiving/lies but not all" Maybe he's right though. But listening to his podcast helped me overcome A LOT of shortfalls and I feel as if I'm improving daily. Hope this helps!

@sometime.somewhere Год назад

@@blackbeardgoatjr2434 thanks, will check him out. I think youre out, however it goes, whatever the consequences of being honest are, releasing the emotional baggage is key

@sometime.somewhere Год назад

@@blackbeardgoatjr2434 also i think the comparison thing is one of the most pernicious to do with a loved one. wild land fire fighter, I dont think ive ever met anyone who does that, what do you like about it? I imagine it feels quite free being out and about outdoors

@chanson8508 Год назад

@@blackbeardgoatjr2434 thanks for the tip! I'll give this rando you suggested a shot 👍🏽

@BenjaminARosso Год назад

I wish this guy was my therapist, gosh he's good!

@sarahlund-nt3kw 10 месяцев назад

He's VERY good. 🙂

@rebeccaoprea9917 Год назад

Her struggle will drive a wedge between them , not his ex .

@villen2020 5 месяцев назад

We all have crazy thoughts. Like me, whenever i think i want to date i just watch this channel and i IMMEDIATELY come to my senses. THANK YOU. Have a great day and a pleasant tomorrow.

@destinyjordan8779 Месяц назад

Dr. Delony had some great advice in this one. His delivery was also kind and clear. ❤

@mattgonzalez4151 Год назад

Geez this kind of stuff makes me feel very fortunate to be single.

@Lesh004 Год назад

I can relate to this lady. We have a lot in common. One issue was resolved by letting my husband know my insecurities. We worked through it together. The second was happening this year. We were in a very bad place, I was in a very bad place. I gained 15lbs in one month, getting anxiety and depression. We worked together and with my doctor. I was placed on birth control to “reset” and fix some issues. Turns out it was all hormonal. She should get her hormone levels checked. Also if she’s still within the first year after giving birth she needs to give herself Grace. My body went so much after. At 3 months pp I told my husband I hated the sight of him. 😂 I was sleep deprived and he understood. Being honest and telling him everything I was thinking helped. Yes it was horrible to say and hear. Thankfully he completely understood I wasn’t “myself”. We wouldn’t have made it through had I not been honest. It’s also amazing how much hormones affect us. As someone who’s dealing with this for a second time I know how important it is. Get them checked!

@starrjohnson1327 Год назад

I definitely understand the hormone thing. I am working through my estrogen dominance. Weight creeps up during hormonal imbalances. There may be a thyroid issue as well.

@ReginaMcNeish Год назад

@@starrjohnson1327 it’s most def thyroid. Lugol’s iodine works miracles…

@starrjohnson1327 Год назад

@@ReginaMcNeish yes it does. I'm taking it.

@genxis6097 Год назад

Yes, hormones. Dr. Leah Gordon is a great resource.

@YASMINOGBU Год назад

Yoh are super women ❤️❤️❤️😘 so inspiring reading how much you over came . Thank you for sharing x

@chosenone2666 Год назад

You're hitting home with the dish story. It took me years to not take it personally.

@CompleteInJesus Год назад

I wonder how she would have responded if he would have asked "Do you feel special to your husband?" It is a real mood killer when a wife believes that her husband would desire any naked woman.

@avaglynn1 Год назад

How horrifying that a mother would say this to her daughter!! My mother had her issues but I'm thankful she never put that on me. I pray I never do this to my daughters. Or sons for that matter.

@ViolinfanaticOriginal Год назад

Why do people marry people they are not attracted to? This was something she struggled with prior to marrying him. Terrible to put her husband and family through this.

@texan903 Год назад

She probably married him because he has a good career, comes from a good family that's reputable, and they could provide a life of comfort and security.

@Penseesmodestes Год назад

a lot of people do that because they fear being forever alone, time is ticking, everybody's getting married, he's nice, has a good job, share the same values, so why would I say no? (the self-convicing process). Years later they realize that they may should have wait for the one. That's my opinion

@peartfaldo Год назад

financial reasons

@Penseesmodestes Год назад

@@peartfaldo not necessarily, a lot of people around me did that because of social pressure around mariage, time passing by, fear of loneliness

@peartfaldo Год назад

@@Penseesmodestes true....but...nothing more lonely than being in a dead relationship....being alone and loneliness are two completely different things. you can be lonely with people around.....THATS the problem....

@SonjaUnapologetic Год назад

Great advice and encouragement.

@vhol93 Год назад

Amazing advice!

@billlohan5079 6 месяцев назад

This man is an excellent counsellor

@Dhuxul9 5 месяцев назад

He is not

@daniellem8790 Год назад

Childhood trauma from her mother mixed with a lot of religious ideologies about marrying equally yoked or another virgin (I was raised this way) can be so damaging to a woman. Her insecurities about not only herself but knowing her husband has done a very intimate act with another woman mixed with postpartum is a recipe for disaster. She has to want to change her mind about his ex. He was a different man then, different circumstances and without those things happening she would have never met or gotten to where she is now. It’s a part of his story and if she can’t learn to accept that and know that she “won”, she’s got the man and he chose her! If she can’t do that, their relationship will suffer.

@sofiabravo1994 Год назад

Being taught to save our virginity for marriage to isn’t damaging, promiscuity in society has had way more destructive effects than being pure. Her traumatic experiences are exclusively caused by her cold mother. She didn’t mention being Christian as a child or anything religious. Many people like myself become believers as adults.

@daniellem8790 Год назад

@@sofiabravo1994 I didn’t say anything negative about teaching children to save themselves until marriage. I wholeheartedly believe it to be better than the alternative. However, what I did or was trying to say is, that I believe it is or can be damaging to try and teach your child(ren) that the person you marry HAS to be a virgin also or else you’re not a good match. Do I think it could make things a bit easier? Absolutely! Is it wrong to marry someone who isn’t a virgin? Absolutely not! But with many religious circles or generally strict parents, marrying someone unequally yoked is a “no, no” and I simply do not agree with it.

@daniellem8790 Год назад

** because what this ideology can fester is extreme guilt on - in this case the wife’s part - for being unequally yoked because how she was raised said not to do xyz. and a sense of inadequacy because she was an inexperienced virgin and her husband was not. Which then creates insecurities.

@CrystalM1917 11 месяцев назад

That's why it is better to be equally yoked though. Studies even show that virgins are the happiest pairings amongst all groups of people. It's not something that someone else made you feel. It's an inherent value. A tenet of christianity and something that the Bible emphasizes as important. Lots of woes came about due to not following the law in the old testament for many men who were promiscuous with women. God calls both men and women to remain chaste until marriage. When that doesn't happen, Consequences of sin come about in different ways. Now they are both suffering bc his wife is insecure about him not being a virgin in their marriage and while it's something that she will have to overcome att his point, she would have served herself better by not marrying him in the first place.

@lademoiselleketoret6958 11 месяцев назад

There is no shame in being equally yoked to someone, nor is there any shame in remaining a virgin or valuing righteous sexual integrity in a marital/covenantal relationship. It’s societal shaming of these things that superimposes an ungodly reproach over such ideologies that does not come from the Lord. It is also possible that her husband still has a soul tie to his previous sexual partners and his wife can feel that in the spirit. It is a real thing. Ppl who have “become one” with multiple people, usually have soul ties to those people and have not been delivered of them and it can be perceived. Their wife/husband can still feel that “someone else” is in the bed/relationship with them and that needs to be dealt with. This is a real thing. It also happens thru pornography. So, it is quite possible that her issue goes much deeper than just her mom making her feel ugly. That’s just real talk.

@tasteyfisher9273 8 месяцев назад

This is great advice, honestly a very similar issue (among others) was part of the downfall of my marriage. Communication is vital, if youre partner is gaslighting you, ignoring you. Etc. its a sign they are dis engaging from the marriage. I highly suggest if you are married and notice your partner do this. To take measures to protect yourself. Yes, try to talk with them, do anything you can to save the marriage. If they don’t however, it’s time for you to move on, because they are about to with you anyways, likely with someone else. But hey that’s just my story! I’m out here and going to make a new story to replace this one. Best regards

@helenellsworth9556 7 месяцев назад

I can say I've been a better parent than most stories I've seen and heard, my kids were brought up to know they are more than enough, I told them the sky is the limit, and the world is your oyster, I have girls in the near 30's,, highly confident, married and children, in safe partnership with their men, not boys. My kids have always been a reflection on me and who I am, much respect has come my way for people knowing my girls.

@zeal4god402 Год назад

"Ya'll can go to a hotel and cause the wallpaper to come off." -John Delony 🤣

@imenehaddad2860 Год назад

Don't do this to anyone. If you're not attracted to someone leave them alone. You'll destroy them

@danielrubio5623 Год назад

I agree, dont marry someone you are not attracted to. And it will be ok, looks arent everything, but they are part of attraction

@anjaxtv Год назад

Agree. So many people stuck in sexless marriages. One life don't waste it on another person who doesn't make you feel good.

@keylacmckemp1309 5 месяцев назад

Actually, attraction comes and goes. The majority of marriages would end because at one point we were not attracted to our spouses. It's during those times you remember the great qualities that person had, what initially attracted you to them. You also seek, counseling, communicate, or work on loving yourself.

@imenehaddad2860 5 месяцев назад

@@keylacmckemp1309 you have to be attracted to them initially

@anared1990 8 месяцев назад

I remember after having my first baby I was feeling so jealous over every woman that went near my husband. I was still very attractive but I couldn't see that. My husband is a Muslim man and anytime a woman is near, he lowers his gaze. He doesn't talk to females or touch them even for a handshake or hug. And still I struggled, and now years later I can't understand why I behaved that way. That man is very much so still attracted to me but I was being crazy. After my second baby, I still feel like I'm attractive to him, he makes me feel special. He's the only man I've ever been with and I'm the only woman he's ever been with. Now I'm working out to make sure I look good even if I get pregnant again, I want to be the best I can be. He deserves that❤

@thermalreboot Год назад

Something I learned years ago that has served me well is from Sylvan Mind Control. The technique is to cancel any dis-empowering thought that enters your mind. It's a simple technique, any thought or even feeling that should appear I say "cancel cancel" in my inner dialogue. If I'm alone I might even say it out loud. Sometimes you're going through your day canceling everything, but over time the unwanted thoughts go away. I've practiced this so often that I often cancel things without being fully conscious of doing it.

@cassie372 Год назад

Wow thank you!!

@Nah-ah Год назад

I’ve been using Silva’s meditation techniques for a few months now! Very empowering!

@MMC-jp1gl Год назад

There is NO REASON ANYONE should tell their spouse ""I'm not attracted to you anymore." NONE. Love is not about some tenuous physical attraction...it's about willing the GOOD of the beloved...an act of the will. There will be times when you aren't attracted to your spouse...and when they aren't attracted to you...but love walks through those times and continues the vows and commitments made regardless of a passing feeling or thought. God bless~

@lwedel3361 11 месяцев назад

well put.

@purplelove3666 10 месяцев назад

No attraction matters, or else you would be with anyone whom you have a good connection with

@MMC-jp1gl 10 месяцев назад

@@purplelove3666 I agree that attraction matters in the beginning when you first form the relationship. But over time it will wane into a deeper connection than mere physical attraction. I watched a video recently on love and dating and they stated the three step process of love: lust, attraction, attachment. Different hormones are in play at each level. God bless~

@proudatheist2042 7 месяцев назад

@@MMC-jp1glnot every relationship progresses as you described. Also, things get to a point where people can't fool themselves out of hard facts. Marriage and dating is a totally different kind of relationship compared to anything else. If one person doesn't like looking at their partner, then that sets the stage for resentment, denial, avoidance, disgust, all sorts of caustic emotions. I disagree with you. People to have valid reasons to tell their partner the hard truth if they are no longer attracted to the other person.

@MMC-jp1gl 7 месяцев назад

@@proudatheist2042 If you break off a lifelong promise just b/c you don't get the emo or hormone "feelz" on a regular basis anymore, then you are immature and shouldn't be entering into a lifelong union. God bless~

@oregoncoastmama3004 Год назад

😫💔How could her mom talk to her like that?!? My mom always told me I was beautiful and that she loved me every day that i was with her. But she also left us when I was 5, I have a pretty bad self esteem and abandonment fears at almost 43. I have daughters I try to tell them daily they are beautiful, strong and smart. ❤❤

@johnsarkissian5519 4 месяца назад

Fantastic analysis!

@jonathanbenevides1359 8 месяцев назад

man, he hit the nail on the head

@donnieweeks8690 4 месяца назад

Sounds like a very horrible mother. My late wife's mom always made my wife feel like she wasn't enough period. Its such a disgusting thing for parent to do.

@tayahhubbard-carter2675 11 месяцев назад

I’m struggling w the same thing but I’m 21 and married and I just think I was rushed because this is not something I really want I’m literally miserable

@terrencewilliams2939 Год назад

I might be mistaken but this phone call SOUNDS legit. If not, she made a perfect act on the call. I can feel the strugle

@hannahsharma5108 Год назад

I did not click on this thinking I was going to cry today 😂

@colmwhateveryoulike3240 Год назад

I used to notice the anxiety voice suggesting worries just because I was hungry.

@juliaperri6528 Год назад

I have never related to something more lmfao

@colmwhateveryoulike3240 Год назад

@@juliaperri6528 Yeah. Good to notice though. Saves a lot of fretting. 🙂

@amosiren Год назад

Honestly, not sure how any Christian enjoys intimacy and sex. You don't go your whole childhood thinking/being told you're a dirtbag for having natural sexual urges and thoughts to suddenly being a sexual adept partner- doesn't matter if you were a virgin or had multiple sexual partners.

@istandwithgod2011 Год назад

Yip, the shame taught in especially American purity culture churches in relation to ones sexual being and self image is actually truly disturbing. Also Many of them may not be having sex, but masturbate and watch porn that by the time marriage is an option they also can have a very distorted world view on and about sex. I knew on gal who was told to avoid ever even being alone in a room with a boys. Like even having a guy friend was seem as shameful. This purity culture in the USA and very superficial ways they teach women in Christian books disturbs me and is truly nothing more than spiritual abuse in many cases.

@joimonae4090 2 месяца назад

@@istandwithgod2011 most Christians are having sex outside of marriage so I don’t know what you are referring to this isn’t the 1800s the Bible says not to celebrate Christmas yet many Christians do so again I don’t see your point people end up doing what they want America is filled with sex culture my body my choice sexual liberation even Christians support abortions so keep the Bible out of this people do what the heck they want to wether they call themselves Christian’s or not

@thereisnopandemic Год назад

I think it’s more about being territorial than feeling inadequate. It is for us men.

@amiramahgoub 8 месяцев назад

There's always something wrong with the parents, whatever they have beloved child or not chosen one! I struggled with insecurity and low self-esteem and it's not getting better whatever they tells me how lovely I am.

@uploadingjoy9120 Год назад

When I was a new mom, my baby took everything out of my body all day and I didn't want to be touched at all at night. I just wanted space!!! That could be a little of what's happening with this caller.

@rachaelmccarl Год назад

This resonates with me. Thank you.

@lotusgsxr750 Год назад

Dang, this call taught me a few things.

@razack7883 Год назад

Wow. Wow. Wow. Well done.

@KitCatForever777 Год назад

I hate to say this but she is one or two compliments away from cheating, IMHO. How does her insecurities cause her to not be attracted to her husband?

@johnsmith-kt7ef Год назад

Agreed glad she's looking into this now, but she needs a good therapist to work this stuff out, bc this is a slippery slope. She also needs to be 100% honest with her husband, bc I'm guessing it was more of a passing statement then a "we need to talk about this and what I'm dealing with". To answer your question, I'm guessing she was a virgin and he was not, and now she is having the "what if" thoughts, bc modern society does not align with Christian views.

@GardenerEarthGuy Год назад

Hope he doesn't have a gardener doing work- I have a collection of panties I've taken from these types...

@rustyshackleford6637 Год назад

she's close to engaging in penile behavior

@starlingswallow Год назад

She might think it's about him but it's about her. She doesn't feel pretty or worthy. That can and does affect your attraction to someone else. 😢

@rustyshackleford6637 Год назад

@@starlingswallow it is about her slovenly ass

@lifeisbeautiful9455 Год назад

My father verbally and physically abused his whole family. I can’t even say thing things he said to my mother or us. The man whose supposed to love and protect is being a bully and saying awful things daily, day and night.

@Musicienne-DAB1995 Год назад

Same here.

@tentrickspony8925 Год назад

She just doesn't wanna fudge him anymore.

@ruthirwin8222 11 месяцев назад

My mum often said, your not wearing that, but never told me i wasnt beautiful im not that beautiful, but i do the best i can

@lav7161 Год назад

Look at the comment section. No wonder relationships don't last nowadays. At any time of hardships, people just want to throw the relationship away. Couples don't want to work on problems anymore. They want fast food instead

@anneshirley9560 Год назад

That's what was thinking. Geez. Everyone just says tells everyone to get divorced. Its crazy.

@emmarose6590 Год назад

Exactly

@tempjones3155 Год назад

At what point should we walk away and leave? I struggle with not knowing where the line is and I end up in really bad relationships for longer than I should have.

@lav7161 Год назад

@@tempjones3155 The point should be what be what you had in mind BEFORE you got into the relationship in the first place. Don't extend to a point you originally didn't agree with

@hollystiener16 Год назад

@@tempjones3155 That is when yu go to therapy to see why, so you can attract the right people.

@---nj7hl Год назад

THEN WHY DID SHE MARRY HIM IN THE FIRST PLACE?!?! SHE CRAZY!!!

@texan903 Год назад

She probably married him because he has a good career, comes from a good family that's reputable, and they could provide a life of comfort and security. When she married him she likely thought it was something she could overcome but isn't mature enough to understand that attraction isn't negotiable. Part of this comes from her not having dated enough to know what she really likes.

@jshepard152 Год назад

Hmm. There must be $ome rea$on.

@JDAfrica Месяц назад

Once she has the baby and access to half his net worth and guaranteed spousal support … it’s weird how some women then see the man as optional.

@adhisboucha295 4 месяца назад

Damn it. I just realized that my mom's words have been subconsciously bouncing around my head creating problems.

@andrephillips7764 5 месяцев назад

This man is good!!

@honestabe7349 4 месяца назад

Why did she marry him. What a train wreck. She married a man knowing she had problems. How selfish

@commonsenseisntcommon1776 Год назад

Never get Married!

@cal.712 Год назад

Lol

@JackWorkz Год назад

This makes sense, find someone you're attracted too then

@DaleEarnhardt4ever Год назад

This is great, but feel he missed a couple things. Postpartum depression can cause hormonal issues, which could effect her this way. On top of that, he didn’t ask if she is on a medication for her postpartum depression such as an SSRI. The medications used to help with the hormonal imbalance can have an unfortunate side effect on your libido as well. However all the advice he gave still is very helpful.

@olganova3058 Год назад

Omg thank you for mentioning PD treatment! Great point!

@JDAfrica Месяц назад

It could be something as simple as increasing folate levels. Which fluctuate and drop in pregnancy. Several studies have identified a link between low folate levels and depression. Folic acid is required for the formation of the neurotransmitters serotonin, norepinephrine, and dopamine, which are known to be deficient in depression.

@starlingswallow Год назад

Read: The Great Sex Rescue! It's an amazing book, especially regarding sexual baggage. My hubby and I are reading it now ❤

@HoneyBeeHeidi100 7 месяцев назад

I wish I could be on his show. I have a whole different story but similar elements. I’m so sad, upset at myself and I just want to enjoy myself and my husband in all the ways we are worthy of. My heart just hurts. I wish I could talk to Dr. John as well.

@HoneyBeeHeidi100 7 месяцев назад

Sometime after commenting this, I started to pray to my Heavenly Father and He said between my ugly crying loud sobs and tears, “You don’t have to wait to talk to anyone, I’m here and always ready to listen and help you work through the most difficult and painful hurts and guilt.” Then He said, “Heidi, be brave and change your story.” And I did. I began saying things out loud to change the narratives and dialogue I’ve learned to be true and made them untrue and I opened my mind and my heart and surrendered and turned my insecurities into fierce, glowing, wholesome empowerment. I’ll need to do this more and more in order to completely heal, but today is the start of a journey to overcome old injuries and finally reintroduce myself to the most pure and authentic parts of me that hid behind lies, pain and heartbreak. What is most interesting and ironic about my environment and specific situation that I’m in right now in this very moment is that I was in the car driving to a local park to do a “walk with Jesus” activity that the women of my church put together. And right now, I’m the only one from my church here. It’s pouring rain in mid November and I live in Mesa, Arizona where it hardly ever rains. The odds of me having a moment to myself on a November Saturday morning, in the pouring rain, sitting in my car after listening to this RU-vid video of a conversation between Dr. John Delaney and Hope about her own intimacy issues (and I say thank you to you Hope, by the way, for being so genuine, honest, vulnerable and human, I admire you and am so grateful for you wherever you are) and feeling all of my own emotions connected to my stories, ashamed, angry, hurt, sad, frustrated, heartbroken… and very alone and hopeless… to the point I pray and have a moment with my Father in Heaven and Brother Jesus Christ as I have quite an episode of catharsis… I’m reminded that even with all this pain, beauty can truly come out of ashes.

@Brenaenae Год назад

Happens more often than not.

@Zer0BurnOver Год назад

Lift heavy weights. Eat real food and 500 calories above maintenance. Sleep 8 hours. Watch your hormone issues go away… It’s amazing what doing just this will do to not only your body, but your mind and self talk.

@stevis78 8 месяцев назад

If you quit allowing him to have sex with you, or resist him even touching you, you've probably already told him.

@Latoija Год назад

I like this John guy

@lizaw.7313 Год назад

Gosh poor girl, my heart breaks for her.

@victorblock3421 Год назад

I have true love, loyalty, affection and wonderful companionship. I have a dog.

@michaelwoods4495 Год назад

This kind of thing happens sometimes. So let's ask a different question, "How do I relearn to love my husband?" You can do it. You made promises and that matters. Whom can you ask? Are there local John Deloneys who could counsel you two? Please give it a go. My mother was somewhat hateful too. Interestingly, when I could cut loose from her nonsense and accept that she was a real dope with her own history, I was also able to care for her in her old age without resentment. Who would have guessed?

@katemiller7874 Год назад

Great job. When we mature we realize our parents are people too. Not perfect. None of us are

@timtresch4848 Год назад

When a woman losses her desire for a man its over. This dude needs to get away from this insecure woman asap, let her sort her problems out before she destroys him emotionally.

@littlelam3691 11 месяцев назад

@@timtresch4848what a shallow, simplistic outlook

@timtresch4848 11 месяцев назад

@@littlelam3691 ok but im right

@brendabenitez7359 8 месяцев назад

I totally understand this girl

@katemiller7874 10 дней назад

Do not express this to your spouse they will always remember this it will change your relationship. Be kind to your partner. Always.

@nt3833 Год назад

I was really hoping this call was going to go in a different direction because what she brought up initially is actually something I have struggled with before. I don’t focus on it hardly, but it is hurtful to think about him being with other partners before me. It’s not because I’m insecure. It’s because I think sex is so special and intimate. I believe only husband and wife should know each other so intimately. I choose not to focus on that fact because I love him and know he loves me. But would I rather us have only been with each other? Yes!

@aileenkrauchi6553 Год назад

Then you need to remember you chose him despite those details. That is on you and not him. You have to learn to let that go,because his past didn’t involve you and he didn’t do things before knowing you,to hurt you. That past you can’t fairly judge him for because it doesn’t involve you. God chooses us daily despite our past. Even when we have sinned against God and he has reason to. This is not your husband sinning against you. My husband in the reverse has felt this way towards me. I felt helpless , like I wronged him,even though I had done nothing wrong. Pray and ask God to let that go,because it’s not your husbands fault.

@nt3833 Год назад

@@aileenkrauchi6553 you make some good points. Thank you.

@skdjirrrdjdm3926 Год назад

I agree, I think he took the easy way and put everything on her being postpartum and things her mom said. Maybe he just didnt know how to address the very real emotion of her knowing something so intimate and special was shared with another woman? Not everyone can handle that. She's not wrong to be disturbed by knowing her husband had sex with another in the past, although I'll bet if she were told or believed that the other woman was "lame" or "disappointing" compared to her she wouldnt struggle as much.

@CompleteInJesus Год назад

God did design one man and one woman to be intimate in the covenant of marriage. When we step out of that, even in singleness, there are consequences. I don't like how the host and most of these comments are putting all the blame on the wife. Sure, her husband and your husband didn't intend to hurt you and her specifically. However, sexual sin in singleness hurts your future spouse. I wish the host would have asked her if she feels special to him. She said it has bothered her for their whole relationship, so I really don't think this has to do with their appearances. A spouse needs to know that they are the only person on the planet that their spouse wants to be intimate with. That can be difficult to believe when there is past sexual sin, without counseling. Before I knew who my husband was, I told an ex boyfriend that we dishonored God and our future spouse. Yes, Christ forgives us but we still have to deal with the consequences of our sin, such as it hurting the one we marry.

@skdjirrrdjdm3926 Год назад

@@CompleteInJesus very well said!

@gsquared2394 Год назад

Man, parents can really mess their kids up if they’re not careful. This lady’s mom sounds like quite a witch, and misery loves company.

@ilsevdg1194 2 месяца назад

indeed

@jewellj3618 9 месяцев назад

What is the book you mentioned for women to read?

@billymabum3514 5 месяцев назад

You tell him before you get married

@ilai7893 Год назад

This caller needs to reconcile this with her mom and hear the affirmation that would at least put her back on the path to feeling more confident. Also appreciate you Dr. for calling her vulnerability out for what it is and telling her to address it

@warriormanmaxx8991 Год назад

@ilai7893 - No! caller does NOT have to reconcile with her Mom, or bring up the past, or to seek out some "Mommy affirmation" after all these years? Are you a licensed counselor ???