Good on you, I’m adopted and when I told my friend all she did was tell me that my parents sent my real parents, she didn’t try to under stand me and what I go through. Good on you for trying to understand ur friend. That means your a good friend. Well done
People dont understand that being adopted is not always as happy as they show in movies like the hurt we feel never goes away and they always time heals but its really just u pushing your emotions down. Im adopted and thats what i do is push my emotions down and when they build up i finally let them go but i feel like no one ever listens and cant relate because unless you were adopted u can never relate to a adopted kid thats just how it is.
@@subyashin nothing cheers me up... Im contantly thinking about my dead step mom and my abusive step dad doesn't help with anything. i usually just sit in my room and cry for hours so ya. i dont think anything will cheer me up... thanks anyways!
I was adopted at birth as well as grew up an only child. Right now I am 18 struggling to adjust to adulthood. Both of my parents sheltered me as a kid and didn’t tell me much about my birth family. Sometimes to me this all feels like DLC i have yet to unlock about my life.
@@hahahahaha315 umm... it is a huge improvement actually! I was finally able to come out as trans and was able to live a normal life! Chase (my step bro) is really supportive and I’m so glad I have him for company... overall it’s so much better, it’s hard to forget the past but I think I will soon
@@geckowithamustache3146 I'm glad to hear that! And I think it's impossible to forget the past, but we can work to get a healthy relationship with it! ^^
I'm 70 and being adopted really sucks, broken marriages addiction alcoholism etc but if I had the knowledge that I've learned through the internet at a younger age e.g. my preteens life would have been much easier.
I'm adopted was a orphan but then adopted when 1. People at school don't know I'm adopted but say your adopted as a joke.. what's wrong with being adopted tho???
nothing is wrong with it's just different then normal people so remember your strong to be an orphan at such a young age and blessed with a family your unique
The best thing you can do for an adopted person once they tell you is that....you act the same. They don't want to feel different. Of course if they are down about it help them but don't treat them different better or worse. You might think ur helping but ur only making it worse
Both of my daughters are adopted. Both don't care about being adopted. We brought them up as our own children. We didn't make a huge big deal about being adopted. Eldest daughter is 35yrs old and youngest is 30yrs old Both beautiful women who were beautiful children. We love our DAUGHTERS 🎉🎉
I'm adopted but it really eats me up the older I get . Me and my adopted family always fight . They are always right they will never try any of my ideas . All I need to do is say yes and obey but the older I get the harder it gets . I just don't wanna be here and I cant stop the anger and confusion in my mind . It's like every thing we can't agree on . I feel like a tennis ball getting tossed in a store room full of stuff trying to find the exits . Not knowing myself loosing myself more and more
I am also adopted, however I feel as though this is more of a growing up thing than a specifically adopted related thing. Yes, your adoption may be adding pressure to it and fueling it, but it sounds like this is more of a growing older issue than anything. It's sounds like communicating is the main issue that's causing all of this. You're not alone. The best recommendation is just to sit down and speak with them. If you can't handle a face to face conversation, you could try writing a letter to them and placing it on their bed or handing it to them.
I agree with Hai zhi. I'm not adopted but there was a time when I used to argue with Parents and felt they can never understand me. But that is phase. It has nothing to do with adoption. Talk to them.
@@fsketchdesignsfengmei3762 i hate my family... im adopted, my mom commited suicide from my step dad, and hes abusive.. i dont even bother to talk to him.
I've had an identity crisis all my life being adopted. My Christian name was changed at 4 very confusing for a child and then my adoptive mother emotionally abused me in many ways. I am angry at my birth mother for giving me up. She did not want contact when I finally found her after research all my life... All I can say what have children done to deserve this?
Banning abortion in usa on top of this is going to make thousands of more children like these. Two alcohol addicts are gonna have sex, give birth and throw the baby away. Idk what pro lifers are thinking.
@@ajrwilde14 notice how you only talked disparagingly about his birth mother, but said nothing about his abusive adopters. This is why it’s so hard for us adoptees to speak out against adoptions that don’t fit the societal norm
I have two adopted daughters from birth. I have been completely open with them about their unique and special story. They don’t think anything of it. Now that they’re 15, I think they’re slightly aware that they stand out because they are adopted. I just recently explained to them and the kids that are not adopted can’t comprehend what that would be like. It can be an unconscious threat to their stability to imagine it. They can’t imagine being without their parents. They don’t understand that to my girls, my husband and I are the only parents they know and love. They feel very stable. Adults usually respond, how wonderful ,when I say they are adopted. Infertility is much more common and much more talked about these days. I think it’s different when a child is a foster care. I know who their biological family is and the trauma that caused them to be taken away and put into foster care
i was super young when i realized i was adopted i cried in silence, (meaning i would cry when no one was around) it also made me feel unwanted, i was a depressed, sad lil boy
Am adopted and it is fine I think we are all a family together and we should take this opportunity to show the world that it is not that bad like people say it is
Always remember guys. Relations are to be made by heart. If you accept someone from your heart it would not matter if you are adopted or the biological child of the person.
You are telling people how they should feel. This is rude. This is a major problem with being adopted. People will lecture you about how lucky you are, you should be grateful. Your mother was probably a … name whatever negative idea is on their mind. And so on.
I was adopted I love my mom so much I just get very embarrassed because she is white and I'm Hispanic we have no dad and I have adopted sister I love her so much. But I feel bad for always yelling at my mom I can't control it.
I get the same questions as Caleb and I'm adopted I am even bullied for being adopted its hard talking about my history because I can't be like everyone else and fit in so its hard to go through being adopted
I know how you feel. I have the same problems. I am left out a lot because people think I'm weird for being adopted and I get mean comments about it and I never talk about my past because of that. I just hope some day it will go away because it is hard to watch all these kids having big groups of friends and there's me with out anyone to be friends with. The only time that I ever get a friend is if they are adopted to and that has happened twice. Both times they moved to far away to see each other. And the only biological sibling I have that I can see once in a while is my 11 year old brother( I am 13) and he still lives very far away with his adoptive family and I hardly ever get to see him. The last time he came over was when I was 10. But when we do see each other we are always happy to be seeing someone with the same blood as us. I get asked a lot what it is like to be adopted and I just tell them that it feels normal like you are like everyone else but I know that is not true.
I so understand I'm turning 13 and I have to pretend I'm somebody else for people to even like me so I became popular for being somebody I'm not and everyone talks about there parents it just discourages me and its hard because we're both different from others
For me, I have so many opportunities now since I was adopted and I have a better life than I could have in Guatemala but It hurts worse than anything else not knowing who you parents were or why they gave you up. All I know is that my dad left before I was born and my mom threw me out at 3 days old. It's caused self esteem issues and it's contributed to one of the worst choices ive made in my life. I've grown up not feeling like my adoptive parents are real parent figures, its more like they're aunts or uncles that took me in but I've never had a parent figure.
It was never a big deal for me untill this year when I found out my biological dad died. It really struck me that one of the people that gave me life is now dead.
Omg I am adopted too I am trying to be happy it can be hard to be happy really I love that I get adopted bye my parents how love me I should be happy I really want to be happy it is not easy to except it so far I am trying to except best I can to be happy I will make another video of how to be happy they are adopted and stuff
im adopted and super super jealous on my cousins and all and i dont go in our reunion because i dont belong to them my mom says that im adopted when im 7 years old and its so hard for me growing up knowing that your parents blood is not flowing inside you im depress
Family doesn't requires blood it requires love Actually I'm adopted too,i haven't seen my real parents yet, if i would meet my real parents i dont know what to do 😫
Blood or not, parents still love you. My husband isn’t the biological father of my 2 oldest but he still loves them the same. He even defends them from his sister that doesn’t like our 2 oldest.
My adopted parents were abusive alcoholics. Just shitty parenting. And now they are old and decrepit & my alcoholic dad is stuck in the hospital because he cannot walk & my mom got a colonoscopy because she is STILL an alcoholic. She has a stoma. A bag attached to her stomach that catches her poop. Both my parents were really mean to me & it made me feel unloved & hated and it got worse as they aged. Just cruel behavior. My dad let me know how much he hated me in his later years. I always knew he was a mean person but i later realized he was a full on narcissist. Like if he got mental help they would diagnose him with npd. But he never got diagnosed. I think the doctors realize he’s a narcissist. Theres no hiding it. He’d have to be the sweetest person in order to hide his narcissism but he cannot do that. He’s always mean. Just grumpy & angry all the time. I hate him. He’s the meanest adopted father i’ll ever know & I won’t cry when he dies.
I'm sorry to hear that. I wish you all happiness. I hope adoption process becomes simple.Proccess is bit complicated, hope I well learn the adoption process soon.
I think you may be conflating kids / teens who haven't come up with ways to express complex emotions or even know the emotions are there. Generally, I would have said the same when I was their age. When you get older, things are more nuanced.
It’s really hurting me so much after knowing that i am adopted but I am not sharing my emotions with anyone I am killing myself from inside bcz I am hiding everything I love me family so much but sometimes they hurt me So much it’s hard to explain I need my fathers love the most but he is always busy in his doings 😭
Hi d daniya Mir, if you're looking to talk with other adoptees, Pact offers an adoptee support group for BIPOC adoptees. You can email us here: adoptees@pactadopt.org. If you are a white adoptee, you can check out adopteesconnect.com/ Be gentle with yourself. Adoption is a complicated, life long journey and there are many of us out here connecting through support groups.
There’s a family on You Tube . They are all white Americans . They have 3 young boys then adopted a 7 year old girl from India . She was the only girl in the family . Then the mother had a baby girl . The 3 boys cried when they held their baby sister . The adopted 7 year old girl didn’t . She’s loving and sweet towards the baby but the boys had a bond with their baby sister that the adopted girl didn’t have . I also find that the mother is not that close with her adoptive daughter as she with her sons and biological Daughter . But the father is very close to his adoptive daughter and cherishes her . Y I wonder what will happen as all the kids get older . The little Indian girl is the only child that isn’t biologically related to her parents and siblings . I wonder when she hits her teens if she’ll feel left out .
My life is being with worst by it, not because of my parents they love me a lot, but society understands me very down and sometimes I felt bad destiny in it ! I am depressed having suicidal tendencies plz help me out I need love my frnds cheated me a lot
okay i have a really heavy question... my indian friend is adopted by their indian parents... good upbringing. luxurious lifestyle barely .5 % of the indians could afford. studied very well, stable career (but not to sustain the lifestyle she is used to growing up with). now their parents are old mother is old and unable to do the housewife related jobs..my friend has to now be the "housewife" of the house and take care of her ailing parents... her work doesnt allow that time and energy for her to give to her parents although she tries. AND the lifestyle she and her parents are used to, cannot be supported by her she either can stay home and take care of her parents and not provide for the lavish lifestyle (also unlearn and totally rethink of a new career)... or work super hard and not be there for her parents....her parents are kinda unreasonable since they pretty much said that they did so much, gave her so much, and now its her turn to return the favour(this happened during a fight i tried to subdue)... they are progressive but not progressive enough in the field of getting profession consultation... I want to help since i have been around this family for three decades.
I am not adopted but an only child. I was also a single parent by the time my parents needed help. I arranged for caregivers to be at home during my absence while I was at work. Filial responsibility does not increase if you are adopted. Be expressive about the concern , take care of them to the best of one's ability but not at the cost of one's own life. And most importantly one should try not to be bullied to agree to anything by the extented family well wishers . Best of luck to your friend.
I can’t have kids of my own and i wanted to adopt but my husband says adopted kids are ungrateful and dramatic and unhappy so after seeing this i actually agree with him now 😢😮
Fake fake fake I’m adopted at 6 so sorry you don’t know what’s it’s feels to be abandoned I am still waiting to my mother to come back Think about that
