I think you should do a Part 2 about the affects of narcissistic parenting in adulthood, such as being emotionally stunted (emotionally immature vs physically mature).
Your playlists demonstrate an unhappy, childish teenager, scared of life, stooooopid to death, unloved, lonely , withy intelligence of a wooden plank. You need to be doing AS TOLD KID. In my hands your ODD would disappear in one month! Here is the useful reading and listening for you: John Rosemond, bill of rights for kids: Children have the right to find out early in their lives that their parents don’t exist to make them happy, but to offer them the opportunity to learn the skills they will need to eventually make themselves happy. Children have a right to scream all they want over the decisions their parents make, albeit their parents have the right to confine said screaming to certain areas of their homes. Children have the right to find out early that their parents care deeply for them but don’t give a hoot what their children think about them at any given moment in time. Because it is the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, children have the right to hear their parents say “Because I said so” on a regular and frequent basis. Because it is the most character-building activity a child can engage in, children have the right to share significantly in the doing of household chores. Every child has the right to discover early in life that he isn’t the center of the universe (or his family or his parents’ lives), that he isn’t a big fish in a small pond, and that he isn’t the Second Coming, so as to prevent him from becoming an insufferable brat. Children have the right to learn to be grateful for what they receive, therefore, they have the right to receive all of what they truly need and very little of what they simply want. Children have the right to learn early in their lives that obedience to legitimate authority is not optional, that there are consequences for disobedience, and that said consequences are memorable and, therefore, persuasive.
36 currently and in my situation I had two narcissistically abusive parents. My father is malignant vulnerable presenting and my mom is cover vulnerable presenting. I've been essentially psychologically sacrificed. I have CPTSD, severe anxiety, and major / moderate depression for as long as I can remember ( definitely know it was affecting me mentally, emotionally, and physically since about 11). The major migraines I've gotten while growing up and still now are linked to the abuse while developing. I have three autoimmune illnesses connected to the abuse and neglect. I've had 16 pre cancerous polyps thought to be related from the intensity of the stress from the duress of being abused and in a situation can't safely leave. There was violence growing up and the one boundary I forced myself to keep was I wouldn't just take any physical abuse. I got alone and cornered and had my father raising his hand in a fist a lot in the kitchen. I'd be balling my eyes out and crying out in warning. So when his fist went up I'd scratch the hell out of his forearms until he'd back up. My little brother had recently died around that time too. Him and my mom told me I'd go to hell for raising a hand to my father and my hands would stick up from the grave. I not only got raged at for crying and for defending myself from getting hit, and that, but I also was trying so damn hard to be 'good' then so when I died I could see my brother. So I had to choose between potentially seeing my brother again or defending myself. But when my brother had died I had already promised him I'd live for the both of us. I've had my entire life taken from me. I've had to defend my humanity daily from multiple sources. And when I did defend myself he also told me that I 'made' him lie to his coworkers, because he 'had' to tell them a cat scratched him. I did my best to be 'good', to protect myself, my little sister, and my mother. I saw it since I was 7 and being the scapegoat has been living hell since.
I've spent my life trying to heal and survive and it feels like I've been dragged along jagged concrete, completely untethered in space, and trapped under rubble all at once. I broke my body trying to work. I can't work. I am forced to keep living here in it, isolated. I have no one. Been actively trying. And just the nuanced amount of retraumatizing issues trying to leave or even get him. The backlash, the disbelief, the lack of awareness, the blame...Police are downright dangerous. I'm poor and physically disabled and no support system. I'm having issues finding an attorney for my disability case, because I'm 'only' 36. I don't have the financial, physical means, or the support to leave yet. I'm sharing all this, because I used to beg my mom to divorce dad and take my sister and I. We were used as pawns. My sister escaped, but now it's not even safe to cry in front of her or speak to her about anything real. So if you have a young child and can safely leave.....do it. Please. If you can't please work on healing yourself as much as possible and be there for yourself and your children. They need you.
And oh yeah I ended up in a really bad narcissistically abusive relationship at around 28-29. My body physically couldn't handle three immediately vying for control. I loved them all, but once my ex was gone the desire only has grown to do everything in my power to recovery myself and eventually free myself from all or die trying. No more.
Who pays for your access to the internet, who buys food for you to eat? Would you please explain, how come you have free time to sit here and write? How much is the cost of the device given to you?
Nothing excuses abuse and neglect. It's not how it works. Ignorance like this is part of why people have a hard time speaking up. They live isolated in hell. Doing their best to heal, recover, and do this all while fighting for their humanity. Continued social ignorance won't help anyone involved...victims/survivor/abuser/enablers/ the public. I fear for my life daily. With no one safe and no where safe to go to. Even the police are dangerous. I've dreaded waking up yet I long to just be allowed to live. It's gross when strangers think trying to guilt trip people surviving abuse is okay.
My dad and I had a falling out a few years ago. He was going to divorce my mom for another woman and it blew my mind because I was raised in a strict Christian household and here is my dad going back on everything he ever taught me. I tried everything to get him to listen to reason and the appeals of me his own son and he used everything he ever taught me and even my religion against me to change and control the narrative. The true turning point for me was when he tried to blame the death of my dog, that I raised from a puppy, on me even though he's the one who hit him with a car and I was living in a different state at the time. He said it was my fault for not training to not run in the road even he hit him in a rural driveway. That's when I was truly done buying his bullshit. Since then I've excommunicated myself from the church because I refuse to give him anything to control me with. I won't let him have a relationship with my daughter and he's not allowed in my house. I won't even go back to the family home because I've been fighting this overwhelming urge to kick the living shit out of him and I know I'll lose control if I see him in person and I have a wife and daughter to live for. It's been a rough few years, but realizing he's a narcissist has brought me some closure, but everything you described is exactly what I went through as a kid almost word for word. Now weirdly enough I can spot narcissists out in crowd because I've noticed they all have a similar look and mannerisms and it just makes my blood boil. I honestly respect what you're doing with your channel, but just an observation of mine is that I instantly get angry when I watch your videos. I actually like your videos and find them very informative, but even though you've said your a self-aware narcissist, and I respect that, for some reason I just instantly get pissed off watching your videos and I have to fall back on logic and reason to control my emotions. Anyway thank you for the video. I'm going to share it with my mother and hopefully it'll help her to deal with my dad.
Please 🙏 There is an issue that is very important to me. It has to do with school shootings. The question of what drives kids to pick up a gun and go kill other kids has long been unanswered for me. But just recently I came across a movie based on a real investigation : 'The Impact. Agroundbreaking documentary'. From it I learned about the puzzle piece coding method. To say I was shocked is an understatement. I am starting to look for information on this topic and came across a video message of an American intelligence agent, where he warns about the danger of this method of impact. But it is very necessary to know the opinion of experts exactly on child psychology. And most importantly, how to protect your children from this. I will be very grateful if you will tell about this method of influence. This topic is so important for all parents. And the recent events in England are proof of this, we need to protect our children.
My exNarc REALLY loves his son and he has a really good relationship with his oldest daughter. That's why I was confused even though he has 6 traits he does ACTUALLY love his kids. He does stupid shit like womanizing but his kids are treated really well.
