How To Forgive Someone - The One Trick That Makes Forgiveness Easy 

It's hard to forgive when you feel betrayed by someone who you though cared about you because it also involves re-structuring how you see them. It's really tough.

Not to sound dramatic, but this video may have just saved my life.

The thing people don't seem to really grasp is, once you've actually forgiven something, when you remember the event you remember it from a lesson learned standpoint. The pain that was once involved in the memory is really gone. If you still feel the pain, you haven't truly forgiven and you need to work on that. And being able to remember the negative events in your life without the pain is truly a gift. Everyone needs to learn how to forgive for real, for everything. I'm learning everyday, and my life gets better.

You can breakup AND forgive someone while moving forward without them. You kinda said it like you can't do both. I can forgive my ex, we can even still be cool, but we will never be together again.

Forgiving someone feels great, it feels like you're physically removing bad energy from your body. Forgiveness is my worst trait, I hang on to things for years and years. It feels dreadful to hang on to so much baggage and finally letting it go feels as if you can fly.

If you liked this video, I highly recommend you watch these videos too: 1) Letting Go Of The Past - How To Get Over The Past In Minutes 2) What Should I Do With My Life - How To Find Your Passion For Life 3) Self Control - How To Develop Self-Control To Create An Amazing Life 4) Positive Thinking - The Key To Thinking Positive

But you can let someone go (a friendship or a relationship, etc) and still forgive them for the wrong they did to you on their part. You shouldn't let them go but still hold on to what they did to you. Forgiveness is for yourself and to end your suffering.

You can forgive without forgetting. You cannot deny what happened. You can try and understand why the person did what they did but you should not forget. Forgiveness has nothing to do with forgetting. Inevitably the relationship will change

It’s important and healthy to forgive everyone. Otherwise it will continue to control parts of you. Forgiving means no longer allowing what was done to you to effect you. That’s important.

"Hate is baggage. Life's too short to be pissed all the time. It's just not worth it." -American History X

I always struggled with the idea of forgiveness, this notion that the strong are the ones able to forgive. When my dad left when I was a kid, my mom became very angry and violent, both verbally and physically. I'm still struggling to forgive her but this video may have opened a tiny bit of the door, which is more than I ever thought it was possible in my life.

I am making myself miserable bringing up and holding onto the past in the relationship with my kids father , this video is helping me 😭

I think letting go but not forgetting can still be an act of true forgiveness. I recently forgave someone who really hurt and emotionally manipulated me, and while the slate is clean with them in that I'm not angry anymore and don't feel as if they owe me anything, I still would never be able to trust them in the way I did when I first met them. I think this advice rests on the assumption that the only reason you would want to forgive someone is to maintain a relationship with them, but sometimes, we forgive just so both people involved can find peace from anger or guilt and move on with their lives. I might forgive someone, but the ability to ever trust them again would probably have to come with a lot of time-it might never come at all. The way I see it, forgiveness is a choice to let go and move forward, but trust is a feeling.

This really helped me. I feel like a 2ton weight was lifted off my shoulder just in the time of watching the video.

Every time I am upset I watch your videos and they instantly make me relaxed. Thank you Leo :-)

I found this video in an attempt to forgive my mother. I've been abused mentally and physically since I was a small child. I want to just let go of all of it so I can move forward with my life. It's so hard to separate the abuse from the person, like when I think of either of my parents my first thought is of the abuse they put on me. Thank you for this video. I'm going to work on this.

thank you. Ive been struggling for years, always dwelling on the past, and have needed to hear these things, you are totally on point. My plan is to make a habit of listening to this frequently until it sinks in 100%

Unforgiveness is like ones own personal Hell. Its like a cancer that we ourselves hold the cure to. We owe it to ourselves to forgive. By doing so we set ourselves FREE! :-)

I don’t think forgiving means forgetting. It means coming to peace with what was and moving on. You’ll remember it and that’s okay, but the memory will no longer be able to hurt you. Think of the memory as soil. Now, you’ve planted your seed. You can move on.

Main point to become better at forgiveness is to become high value person, and have a lot of things going on, so you have a ecosystem of good emotions and your identity will then not be threaten because of other people :) Good stuff

"You have to forget the wrong".... that's the hardest part. I recently asked for forgiveness from a cousin whom I haven't liked for years; I didn't receive a reply, but I'm still FREE from the bind. I was strong enough to release it. I feel the weight off of me. I did my part, I will move on.

After a long self reflection I came to the conclusion that I have a hard time when it comes to forgiveness. Never actually understood what exactly means. Although it sounds simple, actually it's not. I googled "how to forgive" and your video showed up and really helped me. I feel like I still need to watch it a few times to really allow that information to really sink in, but I already feel so relieved! Can't even explain, maybe now is finally the time to really let things go and move forward. Thank you! ❤️

I HAVE TO LEARN THAT HATING SOMEONE SOULD NEVER BE AN OPTION AND THE FORGIVENESS IS ABOUT LETTING GO AND TAKING THINGS NON PERSONABLE.

I go through Fazes where I don’t think I need any help and when something big happens in life you’ve been such amazing help man. Thank you Leo for helping people maintain good lives.

I Love the word forgiveness because it helps me to know who I am and to always put God first in everything we do. To continue to love that person and to remember Jesus has died for our sins and for my wrong doings.

this the best forgiveness video i've seen so far. so true and helpful. forgiveness is a promise we make with ourselves only, we need to make sure we are brave enough to handle it. we have to stop old patterns of wanting revenge or hurt ourselves with thoughts. "the two most hurtful things a human is suffering from is the memories and the imagination." so the key is to not go in the past and not start imagining. be in the present. forgiveness is worthing it, it is freedom in the end. wether you do it for you alone or to give a second chance... because anger and resentment is not poison we send to the one who hurt us, it's only poison to swallow for ourselves. Good luck to anyone who is going through this hard but freeing process. the first step is the harder to take, once you truly decide to do it, the rest will follow. bless you all.

No, it won't change the past, but neither will continuing to harbor negative energy about it.

Leo your videos are helping me a lot into developing the mindset to becoming myself again, the positive person i once used to be in. I've been through some shit and got stuck there for over 10 years. i tried forgiving but i didn't forget and that grudge builds up as you said. I ll keep watching your videos again and again i think my brain needs to be washed with your deep insights and knowledge. its not like I'm naively absorbing what you're teaching, many of your ideas give me the opportunity to reflect on my own life and get new understanding to things. Thanks a lot for your videos! keep on doing what you're doing i appreciate it. love x

You are a real life saver. I have been struggling to forgive & this is exactly what I needed.

I'm really amazed when you said to always look forward because growing is more important. That's very admirable and there are actually a lot of amazing people in the world :)

Exactly what I needed to hear right now about forgiving someone in my life, thank you.

I don't communicate with 2 people but I still need to forgive them for my own well being because I occasionally think of something they did that hurt me even though I feel no anger towards them and I don't have any desire to have any relationship with them. I have not fully forgiven them yet because it still brings back a pain and disappointment.

What if they don't even think they did anything to need to be forgiven? Lol. It is even worse. Let's talk about half-hearted apologies. Plus, when you forgive and let go it means that the person won't do another thing to reopen or activate the same wound. I think in this case to forgive and then forget with someone who will not change, you must eliminate them from your life.

Dude some people i can't forgive, the thought of me forgiving them is more painful then the pain they inflected on me

Oh Leo! I am so grateful to have found Actualized.org, it came along at the exact right time for me. My BF of almost 2 years decided to end it without any warning, zero discussion, and no apology, he just shut down and put on the armor. It was excruciating for many reasons, but I knew I had to get over it (for my son's sake, he's 10). I knew I had to forgive him so that I could move on. It is a process I am still going through, but I could not have done it without your help. THANK YOU for the insight. I LOVE your site and am now watching your videos/listening to podcasts daily.

I want to forgive, but I need that person to stay away from me. He really crosses my boundaries.

Thanks for the video. I'm dealing with someone's un-forgiveness and began to research to better understand. In doing so, I caught that I am quite possibly forgiving as you stated, vengeful. I didn't realize it. Thank you, very helpful. It's a difficult journey to forgive sometimes, when you're under attack. However, as I believe the word of God - if you do not forgive others you will not be forgiven. And, forgiveness frees your mind from all the torment of reliving the pain.

What about forgiveness for someone you don't want to have a relationship with? Like rape? I would like to forgive them very much. I'm very forward thinking. But sometimes the memory comes back. And it's an intense mixture of hate and extreme sadness. I want to forgive for me, not for the possibility of a future relationship.

This is the absolute truth. there is no doubt that when you have purpose in your life and your busy with that your are much more apt to be able to forgive. You make a lot of sense and this is definitely spot on. So you must be a big maslow fan Im sure

you are so brutally honest! man!! talk about calling me out to "repentance!!" i concur! i am an egotistical "forgiver" in so many areas of my life. TOUCHE!! true forgiveness is something i need to learn better

A lot of us are not about to forgive AND THEN "WORK ON THE RELATIONSHIP" with the person or people who ABUSED US. You're not accounting for all kinds of evils certain humans foist upon others. I'm not gonna form a friendship with my rapist because I forgave him, for example. We were never meant to BE in relationship with everyone. This message is harmful and makes no sense for someone who has been abused. It is shaming people into forgiveness, and that is no form of forgiveness. In fact, it is further damage to the heart of a person to send this message their way. Forgiveness is done to set the Self free, not to salvage harmful relationships.

Good advise,not everyone that is around me appreciate this way of thinking,they get very annoyed with me so its really nice to see and hear someone else thinking positive.

This video was great in trying to figure out how to forgive. Great this he breaks down 1/2 hearted and full forgiveness. The concepts are simple, but executing them is not as simple. I love the thought of needing forward momentum in your life in order to get over the petty stuff quickly!!

The Dr. told me I have stage 3.8 Brain Cancer so prescribes me Cannabis . 23 years later she takes my two daughters & divorces me after absconding ALL of our wealth I never questioned because for me marriage was forever . I am doing my best to forgive the witch .

Thank you so much Leo. I've come back to this video many times and it's just helps me so much in my life.

God Bless you, this video really just gave me insight. Absolutely overjoyed and thankful to God right now for finding this video. Never stop what you are doing brother because you are really saving people.

I hold grudges to my parents when they pissed me off. I tend to not talk to them for like a day or even a week. 🤷🏽‍♀️

thanks for all the life-altering videos. really appreciate your work. sometimes, forgiving is about learning how to forgive yourself. my ex used my computer to look for other people, physically assaulted me twice, withheld the fact that he was hiv positive and cheated on me countless times. every time these things happened, i was stupid and inexperienced enough to just go back to him. he apologized for some of the things done, but not for everything. now i have to learn to forgive myself.

I struggle so much..I try to forgive my parents and I’m aware of the roots of their abuse towards me. I am tired of being angry and resentful. But just talking to them triggers the anger in me again.

Thank you so much for all your videoes. It illuminates my heart and enlightens my mind. Baby steps, that's what I'm learning everyday. Best wishes to you. Love from Hong Kong.

I had to stop watching this at 4:00 because you were suggesting that we can consciously decide to "forget", which you claim is the second half of true forgiveness. But in reality it doesn't work that way. Those horrible thoughts and memories find you even when you are not trying to think of them. Or you can see or hear something that will re-trigger the memory. When I heard you talking like this I got the impression that you have never truly been fu*cked over by someone. Not that I would wish that on you or anyone. But you're approaching this as if it can be dealt with in a logical way. It doesn't work that way in reality. It's not some simple formula you can say, "Yeah, just do this, this and this, and you can forgive someone". It's deeper into the psyche than that. Strong emotions, processes and phases are involved that take years to go through. Actually, what you're suggesting is insulting. I mean, if I was a dog I could probably just let it go as soon as someone threw a biscuit in my direction. Humans don't work that way.

I loved this video! it has really help me see forgiveness in a whole new way thank you!

Okay, I’m a new person after watching this! Thanks for the video seriously! Was crying so hard and now feel so passionate about going forward with my dreams instead of sucking on the negative!:) thanks once again!

I must say, I really do appreciate the video content you’re putting out, thank you, it helps a lot.

I stand guilty to the many points that you've mentoned here. Thank you, Leon. This is an eye opener. 🙏🌱✨💝🐢

I would argue that forgiveness is not to let go and forget, but actually to let go and move forward. To forget injustices no matter what degree the magnitude means to forget the lesson that the injustice taught you and risk falling back into the same painful circumstances that led to needing to forgive in the first place. To remember what happened means you get the chance to learn and grow and carry the lessons as you move forward with your life.

Thank you. Been grappling with this one for the last while now and it's a big one, because it's my mom, and she's pretty deep in the back 9 nowadays... I need to try and forgive and forget, the abandonment, the Anger and the hurt... True forgiveness, so an honest, healing love can take place in the sunset of her life.

I'm aware of a few that may want to check this out, my forgiveness is present, how people feel about me has no effect on my being.Thank you great video.

This guy was heavily trending 5 years ago in my feed. I was in a bad spot this guy cleared up alot.

It is very compassionate that you made these videos for those of us in pain.

The question was: how to forgive? Your answers were: A. Forget. Ok but how to forget? B. Make a decision to forgive. I know i have no point in hating but i still remember and hate. Thanks for this 16 mins.

This is the best video on forgiveness I have ever watched. Thank you. Listening to you brought me peace.

I've been really struggling and this really genuinely helped me, thank you so much :,)

"Forget the wrong," wow. very powerful.

Very inspirational! I love this thank you for clearing my thoughts!

Once again you've come through for me. Of all the damn videos I've watched on this subject and yours is the only one that rings true in my head. Thank you very much.

The anchor has a really pleasant voice. And seems to be a sincere person and open to help

Forgiveness is the key to living your life. Of ourselves we cannot forgive, it’s humanly impossible. You do not decide to forgive, it’s something you realize from within that you must go and do.

Omg..The last 3 to 4 minutes really kicking in, deep. It made so, so much sense.Thank u so much Leo. U hit it on the nail. G.Bs u brother..

My biggest challenge is forgiving myself. I broke my moral code. I lied and lost my relationship as a result. I am not built to lie or deceive, but resentment crept in and caused me to make a bad decision I thoroughly regret. I don't know if I can ever move on from it.

THANK YOU 🙏🏼💎 I love that video so much ! It's so funny cause all the things you've said are almost word to word the discussion I had today with my mom about forgiveness... wow !! It's sums up all the things you need to know about the topic... genius 💎

i have found my purpose because you helped me. :)

I so need to apply this on forgiving myself.. I could feel that when you were talking. Thank You again

This is so helpful, thank you again Leo!

I want to thank you for this with all my heart, thank you for helping millions of people

Thank you! I needed to hear this!

Thank you so much you are a life saver now I can be a better person and improve!

the ending of this video is inasely true. i did yoga to this:) thank you. bless you.

Good energy. Relevant and useful approach. You are doing a lot of good. Like to listen to these lectures... Thanks

Yes it comes up the situation that automatically remind me of the past ,yes Im willing to move on, yes I understood that I have to have a goal , to think about the others not just my problem, to help and be in service of less fortunate, but I think the most important component is to UNDERSTAND that person so you can adjust your expectation of them and can fully sympathize and forgive fully.

Yeah. I've heard people say forgive but don't forget. For me.. it doesn't mean holding a grudge.. but more a thing used to make decisions with this person...the useful part. I want forgiveness in my life. I enjoyed this.

Thank you....I've been searching for a way to forgive and this makes sense and I'll get a better life in the process. Great!!!

You can have goals, dreams and ambitions and still get madly hurt in a relationship. In fact, that is the reason why, it's because the person you are dating is close to you and has access to your deepest emotions. Being wronged by a stranger would be completely different and not have as much or any impact.

Thank you kindly. This video has saved my relationship and made me better. May you be blessed!

I really thought I had forgiven my partner but I realize I became fearful and empty inside. Your video has really touched me... I hope I can have the strength and courage to follow your advice.

So... I will now forget the lack of child support for the last 17 years, so I can forgive the dude and free myself of the hatred that I have for myself for getting involved with someone who would abandon their children. I got so much forgiving to do... maybe I could let go of everything and start all over again. That's why I'm watching. I want to be free of all the damage done to me. Free of the damage I did to myself. Thank you. Baby steps. ❤️

When a person does the same thing over and over. And you forgive them over and over. And they keep doing this same thing over and over. It's time to move on. You have to realize that things will never change and they will never change. You can love them and you can leave them. And if you want you can forgive them. But you certainly have to leave them. Because they will destroy you.😪

Yeah if the person is not regretful or doesn’t agree not to do that again, blames you for their poor behavior - it’s over. There’s no moving on. Forgive it and forget it as you walk out the door.

Great vid,I was in a relationship a while back that I thought was going really well, I felt really strongly about the guy, thought he felt the same, it was passionate etc. But he ended things quite abruptly and for a long while now I've has that 'revenge forgiveness' which I know is wrong. This has helped me realise a few things, thanks.

“For we all stumble many times. If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect man, able to bridle also his whole body”

Is Leo of this world? this video is so relevant rn haha

It feels a little quaint. The hurt people can inflict can be huge. Breathtaking. And then there's a grudge. And the grudge bores itself into your mental habits until you have difficulty focusing on anything. It takes over and may take days before you can get your head above water. Forgiveness is a process, and grudges are habits. They can be broken, but there will be relapses, and it takes a lot of work, ever the more depending on how long and deep the cancer of the grudge has buried itself inside of you. I don't know if I can pull it off. But dying trying is better than the abyss of bitterness.

You just changed my life and might have saved my relationship with the love of my life

I get what you're saying mate and it's really helped me with my spouse who has made a mistake, not cheating but stupid lie that hurt and this video has helped. I do feel the deadliest wound you can ever suffer is betrayal from your spouse. There is nothing more psychologically devistating than having someone you loved, cared about, trusted with your life, and would've died for. I'm all for the rise above, but unless you have actually experienced severe loss from betrayal, you really don't know what it feels like at all. We can tough talk, but true betrayal is beyond evil and extremely damaging psychologically. Please tell me when you say I don't let it bother me you're talking about smaller petty lies or silly mistakes because if you can not worry about your wife of 16yrs cheating I have no wordss. I suffered a small dose of trauma from this and it has shown me some of the darkest shit I never knew possible.

You should always forgive the the person who wronged you ......for you. 😔🙏🏽

Thank you for all of these videos...

thank you for the insights and perspective shared. I find it very practical, logical and helpful. I was searching amongst your videos for thissparticular topic, as I have taken a decision to cut someone off from my life, because of the toxic behaviour they constantly display and I lost hope and strenght in their ability to repair that. anyhow, although im cutting them off, I feel the need to forgive the person, so I dont carry the pain and resentment around, although the person is gone. I think your advice is applicable in this situation as well, not only when u want to have a relationship sorted out. thank u again.

I really needed this today!! I sought out your input ! Thank you

Forgiveness and reconciliation are two different things Forgiveness is for us to have personal and inner peace. We can forgive people, but we don't have to reconcile with them. I believe forgiveness is necessary for everyone. We should forgive everyone, but we don't have to reconcile with everyone.

I stopped drinking three weeks ago and now twenty years of hurt and bitter resentment is boiling up that I had "forgotten"... I have soooo much forgiving to do