How to Know if Someone is Emotionally Immature: 7 Clear Signs

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Just because someone is of adult age, it doesn’t mean they’ve reached emotional adulthood. It’s not about landing the ‘adult job,’ buying a house, or affording the finer things in life. True emotional maturity comes from within-learning to view situations and oneself from a more mature, grown-up perspective. In this talk, I teach what it really means to become an emotional adult and why it’s essential for a fulfilling life, and healthy relationships. We’ll look at the signs of emotional immaturity, the obstacles that can prevent emotional growth, and the steps one can take to cultivate a deeper self-understanding. Viktor Frankl’s powerful words remind us: “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom."
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ABOUT JULIA:
Julia Kristina, MA, is a speaker, teacher, master therapist and mental wealth coach who helps smart, highly sensitive, heart centred humans get past anxiety, stress, and self-doubt so they can have better: Better relationships, a better life and feel better about themselves.
Through her membership program, The Shift Society, she helps people identify their deep rooted thoughts and beliefs that are keeping them stuck and struggling, and then teaches them how to take charge of their minds and emotions so they can thrive in all areas of their lives.
Julia’s expertise has been featured in Inc magazine, Psych Central, Mind Body Green and numerous other publications, podcasts and television outlets. She has also given talks in front of audiences of hundreds on stages across North America. Videos on her RU-vid channel have been watched more than 15 million times and she has built a community of over 375,000 people across social media platforms. When she’s not helping her clients and students increase their emotional intelligence and mental strength, she’s out on some kind of adventure with her three children in Vancouver, Canada.

Опубликовано:

31 окт 2024

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Комментарии : 76

@juliakristinamah 2 месяца назад

Hi! And thanks for watching. What was one of your takeaways from this talk?

@lesliengo8347 2 месяца назад

One key takeway is that this is deserving to be taught in school.

@mistrock322 2 месяца назад

I am 45 and still working on being more emotionally mature. It takes work and that doesn't mean you're a bad person.

@Broller1113 2 месяца назад

I’m 40 and this is something I’ve never been taught. So it’s good to know I’m not alone. Take care of yourself and stay strong you got this! 🫶

@lamnuck 2 месяца назад

She FINALLY lists the 7 signs at 8:10

@bigredracingdog466 2 месяца назад

I hate it when RU-vidrs can't just get on with it.

@tammythompson820 2 месяца назад

Thank you sheesh...

@B.D.TRX4 2 месяца назад

@@bigredracingdog466 i have ADHD and i cant watch most of her videos due to this..

@bigredracingdog466 2 месяца назад

@@B.D.TRX4 I get impatient after 90 seconds of blabberation. If a RU-vidr does it to me a couple times I click "Don't recommend channel."

@kellypolfleit3942 2 месяца назад

😂😂

@lesliengo8347 2 месяца назад

I notice myself becoming more emotionally mature thanks to you Julia. I don't control people's decisions, manage my thoughts and feelings and treat myself with compassion.

@SusanHerbert-ho8bf 2 месяца назад

Change takes change , and you have really helped me with emotions, Its an inside job ! . Thank you !

@AriefBudiman-m3b 2 месяца назад

Your videos help me all these years to get a little bit closer to emotional maturity. Thank you.

@juliakristinamah 2 месяца назад

you are so welcome. Thanks for being here with me.

@Marekcatholic 2 месяца назад

Thank you Julia for these great video's! They help to slowly chip away at our stuff. Depending on the people's immaturity level it can be hard to deal with. People can look so pretty and charming on the outside but once we get inside suddenly its not so glamorous.

@chrisdigitalartist 2 месяца назад

Hi Julia! Senior Shifter Chris here! Here are my thoughts and notes: How to Know if Someone is Emotionally Immature: 7 Clear Signs. My thoughts: I can see where I may have struggled a bit in each of these signs, however, I am going to focus on where I am improving. I think for me, sign 5. I am improving in this aera, because I am not (always) avoiding my thoughts and feelings and since being a shifter, I have learned to manage my minds and emotions. I can regulate what is going on, I can sit with uncomfortable feelings, acknowledge them, and try to be more intentional on how I want to cope or respond to things. My Notes: * Age doesn't make someone emotionally mature. * Becoming an emotional adult requires that we develop a certain level of awareness about ourselves. * Manage our minds and emotions and stop reacting to everything around us. * It is never too late to become emotionally mature. * You take responsibility for your own thoughts and feelings. 7 Signs of emotionally immature: 1. They don't take responsibility for their actions. 2. If someone really struggles with rejection or losing. 3. When someone can't cope with emotional discomfort. 4. When someone struggles with flexibility or compromises. 5. They are quite avoidant. 6. When someone takes over responsibility for somebody else's feelings. 7. If someone worries excessively about upsetting or disappointing anyone ever. *To work on these, just do the opposite as well as make decisions and make mistakes!

@linettelow 2 месяца назад

Thank you for sharing this, Chris. I struggle at times with points 2 (abandonment/rejection) & 5 (occasional avoidance of very difficult emotions from traumas). Have come to appreciate that everyone’s a work in progress, perfectly imperfect & beautifully human.

@chrisdigitalartist 2 месяца назад

@@linettelow You're very welcome. Keep working at it and be gentle with yourself. Yes, we are all work-in-progress. =)

@natashadziesinski2916 2 месяца назад

I was one of those people that was so emotionally immature due to all the trauma I have been through. I was hard on myself all the time and didn't set boundaries or have my own voice. I am so thankful for your mentorship. Without you and your team in The Shift Society, I would still be a mess to this day. I always appreciate you so much. I am still trying to find the balance though with people who are really emotionally immature and who are always asking me questions and big paragraphs of feeling sorry for themselves and just beating themselves up. It makes me sad and reminds me of where I was. I just don't always know what to say. I feel as though I have told them all I can advice wise. I try to listen and be there for them but it can be draining.

@luna-kiva Месяц назад

Stoicism is one of the greatest tools for learning emotional maturity and intelligence. It’s a philosophy and mindset that you are teaching here. Thank you for this.

@SuiGenerisMan Месяц назад

Absolutely brilliant presentation. You'll probably laugh at this but, your videos clearly show me the CASAM of difference between a high quality therapist and a everyone else. Over the years, I've come to the realization that talented therapists are rare, and most therapists are so unstable in their own lives, that they struggle to present information like this, clearly & concisely.

@cpvenkatanathanparthasarat4182 2 месяца назад

Enjoyed the talk. You speak with ease and explain with quotes. Best way to teach.

@juliakristinamah 2 месяца назад

so glad you found it helpful. Thanks for watching.

@craigmerkey8518 2 месяца назад

Thank you so much ! This unfortunately describes many family members. I have a little interaction with them as possible !

@CoachSarahNicoleB 2 месяца назад

Absolutely love this. Such an important thing to take a look at. Thank you.

@nicholaspetrovitch7925 2 месяца назад

Another great video as always! Thanks Julia!

@juliakristinamah 2 месяца назад

Thanks Nicholas - so glad you found it helpful.

@BilalAhmed-yo1nn 2 месяца назад

Thanks lovely Julia. Your videos have been very helpful to me for improving my psychological health. I often read your newsletters, I appreciate all your work

@juliakristinamah 2 месяца назад

You are so welcome - and thank YOU so much for all your support - It means a lot.

@karlasilis-cruz528 2 месяца назад

Thank you so much for this video!

@juliakristinamah 2 месяца назад

You are so welcome! Thank YOU so much for watching.

@djbeatzzz 2 месяца назад

Hi Julia my name is Jason. Thank you for your help

@juliakristinamah 2 месяца назад

Hey Jason - welcome to our little corner on the internet. Thanks for introducing yourself and saying hello!

@saggie5261 2 месяца назад

Describing my now ex partner perfectly. He’s never sought help, just blamed me for everything that went wrong. I always comforted him in his catastrophising but I never got the emotional support I needed. Over and out!

@banthatracks_gaffisticks 2 месяца назад

I am 42 years old and I am a Jedi.

@matthiaslangbart9841 2 месяца назад

My thesis BEFORE watching the video: Emotional adulthood begins with overcoming a huge biographical crisis: Being laid off, the death of a family member, going through divorce, a very bad medical diagnosis - the kind of stuff that forces you to be grown up to survive. Let's see what I say after watching it.

@_apey Месяц назад

It would be helpful if you could provide a couple of real world examples about what you mean for each point made. This would help cement the concept(s) in the minds of the viewers.

@juliapalomo9975 2 месяца назад

Good morning my name is Julia. Can u guide me how to deal with negative people around u and not letting them change your positive mood?

@grannysweet 2 месяца назад

Headphones work for me. Best to develop lots of little tools to avoid the negatives that are unavoidable, lol. Shared meals a nightmare? Sit away from them. I sit outside (with headphones) . At least the mosquitoes are honest about they're blood sucking.

@Clevelandsteamer324 2 месяца назад

Empathetic people and especially INFJ types. Can absorb negative energy. It’s why they are always exhausted

@juliakristinamah 2 месяца назад

yes!! I will do a YT vid on that soon. Thanks so much for your suggestion.

@monikaleszko5343 2 месяца назад

If they’re at work. Just repeat “ I’m getting paid “ lol other than that…don’t be around them 🎉

@mathildehb0076 2 месяца назад

Emotional immaturity can also come in grey zones. Like in some ways we are emotionally mature, and in others we aren’t. But it is best to be mostly emotionally adult

@Seraphim7 2 месяца назад

It’s Ok to Express Emotions. You got to Feel it to Heal. And, you got to Be Honest. Suppressing it is Unhealthy. Co-dependency and people pleasing come from Trauma and Being Abused. I wouldn’t Label it as Emotional Immaturity.

@Audrey-k2h 2 месяца назад

Becoming emotionally mature is a choice

@michelleveloni1329 2 месяца назад

Thank you so much. How can i get the guide you spoke of....Big Feelings for Sensitive People. Thank you.

@backyardrailroader 2 месяца назад

The only one I can relate to is being hard on myself. But it is not on everything. Only on a few things when I am attempting to accomplish something and it either takes me 3-4x as long to do it as everyone else or I fall short.... way short...... of the goal I was striving for.

@angelamossucco2190 2 месяца назад

beautiful summary I like the book by lindsay gibbons and ACA meetings are free!!

@johnkuthe1 2 месяца назад

John Kuthe, RN and I am emotionally an Adult! Now I just wish my Housemates would pay me $300 a month for August 2024. But they don't..

@lgroves336 2 месяца назад

She describes about 90% of the world population being qualified for emotionally immature.

@jodizellmer994 2 месяца назад

Unfortunately, this describes my parents.

@gabrielaporras1410 2 месяца назад

Hi. ❤

@theresafoley345 2 месяца назад

Also from a parent who was overly protective and compensating for being a single parent, like me. I don't know how to help my adult son now ! What can I do? He asks for help every day. Please advise. Thank you. ❤

@captaindan1000 2 месяца назад

There were going to be six but that's not a lucky number. So Julia ended up with seven.

@curtkeisler7623 2 месяца назад

Shifter

@juliakristinamah 2 месяца назад

Hey Curt!! Glad you're here Shifter.

@lgroves336 2 месяца назад

Age / numbers mean NOTHING

@kimlec3592 2 месяца назад

If you had to be mature from a young age, because your parents were traumatised, doesn't it make sense that you may be emotionally immature after a lifetime of being strong for parents who were not? Just asking sincerely.