A brain-changing cross between mental wellness and personal development. These videos will help you understand what's going on in your mind and emotions, and then giving you the tools to make the necessary changes to help you feel happier, more confident, and less anxious so you can love yourself, others and your life better everyday.
The tools I teach are research-backed, cognitive science strategies including those from CBT, Mindfulness & Self-Compassion.
i’m morgen, i am in my first year of college and to be honest i am really struggling… i was unfortunately born with achondroplasia (a form of dwarfism) i constantly get stuck in my head and think of every single negative thought, i feel like everyone is judging me and i feel really left out and thinking everyone hates me
I'm good with,Me! Dont give up, keep going😮😮 love Pam, funny, so said, loved, says I'm good, loved like, pudding the proof in it, well see, not impossible
Encouraging words. Very logical advice. If only we were equipped with an off switch for our feelings. And most of us who play the comparison game intuitively know it's illogical. But just because we're *told* to feel proud of ourselves and not jealous of others doesn't mean, ding, it happens in a blink.
Had to comment halfway through the vid, literally spot on with everything… The fact that I was blind to all this is mind blowing. Like I knew but what happens is they’re in control of how you feel. What really got me is she was controlled by her father and verbally abused. Now it all makes sense and things are aligning.
I don't compare in physical looks or body composition, but it's in my professional life and my spiritual practice that it comes on strong. I see other people in my profession who are engaged, active, and have all of this knowledge that I don't have. Why am I not more like them? Why don't I care as much about issues in our profession as they do? I see fellow meditators who are seemingly more engaged with their practice and are rising in status in our spiritual community.
every time i go to church i envy those two income couples, that are active in the church, raising a family, nice homes, and i am on the other hand am caring for a sick wife, dealing with recent losses of siblings, and constantly keep getting knocked town, and getting back up
I’m proud of despite how hard it was to be in this rollover van accident I’ve came so far. I haven’t let my trauma become suicide. Even though at moments it feels like I have and I’ve kept going.
Uses profanity and resorts to insults and name calling when they don’t get their way, then tries to mask it as constructive criticism; vows to ruin your life because you took a stand against their abuse, so quick to kick you out of your own house for the day, then if you’re out too long accuses you of cheating; infecting you with an STD then gaslight you into believing that you caught it from the person who you’re supposedly cheating with, makes you feel guilty for trying to break up with them, emotionally abuses you, then when the authorities show up, makes you out to be the unhinged one, then the next morning denies ever abusing you and calling you bipolar; constantly threatens to break up with you, stating how miserable they are with you, then when you decide to leave them, twists your arm to make you stay; and reactive abuse. All of the things I am currently going through. And I was abused throughout my childhood but I ended up in an abusive relationship. It’s like I’m cursed or being punished for something that I might have done in my past life
My thoughts and notes on Julia’s RU-vid video (10/31/24): How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others (and feel GREAT about yourself) This is one of my favorite topics. I enjoy this topic because it is one of the things I have struggled the most, and now one of the things that I am overcoming! To me, I have always struggled when I had a crush on someone and yet that person is with someone else and I would compare myself to that person. “I am not as attractive as that person. “or “I am not good enough.” Although, there may be some intrusive thoughts, I can take a step back and overcome them by reminding myself, “Chris, look at all the mind management and inner work you have been doing. This feels good and makes me fall in love with myself (in a healthy way) and I am starting to believe because of this work, I am attractive enough. Good job. I am proud of you!” Here are my notes: * Ask yourself what is it that you are comparing yourself to that person? * What it takes for that person to get or have what you want? * Am I willing to do the work and put in the effort it takes me to get to that similar outcome? * Be honest, do you really want that outcome? Do you really want to do all that work and effort? How to overcome the comparison trap: * Be happy for those that you have compared yourself with. Create a list that makes them great. * Be proud of yourself and acknowledge the things that are great about you. * Make a list that shows what is great about you. * There are things that are great about them and there are things that are great about me. * Keep your eyes on what is important to you and focus on that: * This is where I'm at. * This is where I am growing. * This is where I am showing up intentionally. * This is how I am investing into the things that are important to me. * Be proud of that and grateful for focusing on yourself for doing that. * Keep the eyes on my own journey. * How do I want to show up today that aligns with my values and my goals? * If you are going to look at other people, look for them for inspiration, and NOT comparison: * Look at the possibilities and get excited! * Be intentional when scrolling through social media: * Check in with yourself after using social media. Does it make you feel good? * Look at who YOU are and what YOU have to offer: * No one can do you better than you can do you. * Only you know where you are at and what you have been through and what's important to you. * Fall in love with yourself, be proud of yourself, and be your own best friend.
Generally, it comes down to my looks. You are right, I can’t change my face without surgery which is not within my value system. I can make impact on my health and how I take care of my body.
Yes 🙌🏾! It leads to negative intrusive thoughts like, “They are so much better than me” or “I’m not good enough” Rehearsing or feeding into those thoughts leads to anxiety and depression if not dealt with. Galatians 6:4 says “Focus on your OWN work, for then you will receive the SATISFACTION of a job well done, NOT COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS! Thanks for this❤
Thank you so much for this Julia. I grew up being harshly shamed and rejected as a child. No I’m so hard on myself that it has caused me and people around me problems. Never was taught self compassion. Having to learn it at 43 is rough.
1) quitting when something gets hard 2) telling yourself you don't deserve what you want 3) thinking you won't be able to maintain whatever progress you make 4) thinking if something came easier to someone else, you're not good enough to have it too I have all these 4 things. How can I overcome these self-sabotaging thoughts and behaviors?
Very well said. Thank you for putting things in perspective. I really struggle with ppl pleasing . I just need that guidance in the right direction. Thank you Christina. How do I get your guide?
I had a friend who always trauma dumped on me and was never there for me.. the friendship was extremely one sided and she was never happy for me whenever things were going my way (IE: losing weight through diet and exercise, dating a new guy), she was jealous and I finally realized she was there to watch me fall, not lift me up.. and she gave me horrible dating advice. She would also get upset whenever I wanted to go "Dutch treat" at dinner when it was her idea to go out in the first place. I’m of the opinion that friends should always go "Dutch treat" when eating out because we’re grown-ass women with credit cards, 401Ks, and savings accounts. I’m not paying for somebody else’s meal. We’d been friends since age 12, and I’d clearly outgrown her (while she hadn’t grown up at all). We work in the same office and I secretly hope that she’ll quit so that I don’t ever have to deal with her again. She’s a real downer.
