The Guessing Game: Make Small Talk Effortless And Fun 

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that moment when you're so awkward you need to watch a tutorial on how to socialize

"oh my god you're so funny are you a comedian" i can't say that without coming of as sarcastic

Lmao, I'll end up saying- *"why are you 23 years old?"*

How it'd actually go down: Stranger: *tells joke* Me: *laughs* Wow you're so funny, are you a comedian? Stranger: No. Awkward Silence

I hate when people ask what I do for fun. I have to tell them I watch youtube videos.

5. Realise that is't not only your responsibility to keep the conversation going. The other one has to put some effort in it too. So if a conversation turns out into an akward silence, it's not only your fault, but also his/hers. Don't blame yourself too much if it doesn't work out every now and then.

This is like learning how to be a human being im fcked lmaoo

Me irl "Wow your dress is nice, you must be a swimmer"

1. Compliment + Cold Read 2. Open-ended Questions 3. Turn it Into a Game ("Hang on, let me guess") 4. Elicit their Advice or Opinion

All these comments are really funny Wish we could be like this irl...

Her: you’re so funny, like my brother! Me: so why do you have a Brother??

If you are real confident you don't mind about silence, just talk when you feel like it!

Everyone’s a introvert here....

This is what helped me: The main solution to conversate without it being awkward is not over analyzing so much. Stop focusing on small things like “how to talk to people” and stuff and you will naturally become more good at speaking to other people because the reason we are so awkward is, our head goes blank and you end not knowing what to say, if we do have something to say we overthink that its not a good question or response so we sit their silent or we have serious social anxiety that makes us think everything we say or do is wrong and every one is judging us. We over analyze people so much but if you really help yourself realize these are just humans they are not superior for you to get nervous to just talk to them the conversation will literally flow as if you were talking to a close friend. I remember watching this video a long while ago and I was binge watching videos on how to act in public and all and non of the advice stuck in my head when it was time to talk or something I literally forgot what to do and how to act and than I realized if I just stop over analyzing everything, everything wouldn’t be so fu**ing hard! YOU GUYS DONT NEED HELP TALKING TO PEOPLE YOH NEED HELP BEING MORE CONFIDENT🤎

Compliment + cold read “oh my god ur shoes are so nice, are u illegal?”

The moment I realized that I've done some weird "interview" instead of conversation. Thank you for the tips

I don’t get it, how to you carry a conversation? When I’m around people, I’m usually the quiet one, and when they talk, it usually either goes 1. *friend says something* Me: why didn’t I think of that Or 2. *thinks of something potentially funny to say after conversation has ended*

my friend:*tells an interesting story* me "öhh"

This is my #1 goal to master in the next year. I’m not necessarily shy but I NEVER know what to say and I come off so awkward and shy when I’m not

* me as a doctor in hospital * Me: how are you? What brings you here todayy? Oh no, actually I want to guess!!

I should be studying but somehow mastering the art of small talk just feels more important at the moment

Me: Hi Her: Hi Me: so, how you doin? Her: pretty well Me: .. ok Her: ok Me:...bye Her: bye

People should stop thinking awkward silences are undesirable. Live with it. Russians never worry about awkward silences, it's basically a part of conversation.

“So... How long have you been 24? Ooh, no wait lemme guess... 24 years?”

So how long have you been 23? Wait no Shite Nvm

Me: *comes up with a joke that matches the situation, nah, no one will laugh* My Friend: Tells the exact joke I'm thinking of Everyone Else: *dying of laughter* Me: *dies inside*

Improve small talk 0:56 Why is small talk needed? 1:37 Compliment + Cold Read 2:59 Avoid one word answer question. Ask an open ended question so they can give their opinion, thoughts and ideas. 3:55 Long answer questions 4:36 Guessing game 5:44 Asking others advice/opinion

"No more awkward silences." Step 1: stop thinking silence is awkward.

I'm always practising when I take an Uber or Lyft. I'd say that's the best place to practise.

"what do you do for fun" is an annoying question. It's right up there with, what kind of music do you like?

Me: Wow nice hair Them: Thanks Me: How old is your hair? *Awkward silence*

I have been recovering from social phobia and have been finding these videos incredibly helpful. Practicing talking to people time and time again and walking away most of the time feeling like I was boring or could have done significantly better can be really discouraging, thank you for expanding my tool belt in this process!

I don't like that so many comments here focus on Ben's appearance, so I just want to say: Your video is really helpful and I like that you became a part of this channel :)

1: Compliment and then a guess based on that compliment 2: Avalanche of words (open questions) •Avoid one word answer questions instead use questions the other person can say things other than yes/no/5 years/ •Ask questions the other person wants to answer, about things that he enjoys. Eg: what's exciting these days at work, not how is work - what do you do for fun. Questions about themselves, their characters/personality. 3: Guessing game. Eg: Where are you from? -> Where are you from? Wait, give me two hints to guess. Use this technique with caution, best suited for situations you want the conversation to be enjoyable and funny. Not with your boss. 4: -

I like videos like this, everyone wants to get past small talk but I always see it as an avenue to cool and interesting topics about the person. You have to start somewhere and small talk, if done right is a great way to do it.

Great video thats something I was always wanting to know. Thank you!

I appreciate the effort to be much more enthusiastic and extroverted. Definitely giving me ideas of how to chill out not be so nervous and keep it light and fun like I was talking to a friend. It seems like it’s about being really relaxed and taking those thoughts we have in our heads and saying them out loud.

Wow you really like breathing i think! Do you like oxygen? Yeah.

This is the kind of video I like. Brief enough. Knows his stuff. Review at the end. Good, useful material. 👑

What always impresses me about COC videos is that the hosts always clearly do the video in one (or just a couple) take(s). This proves that they know what they're on about, because they have the confidence to happily speak for 10 minutes at a time on a topic.

Interviewer: tell me a little about yourself Me: I like apples

Love what all of you are achieving on this Chanel. Your videos have helped a lot and I’ve Probaly just seen about all of them. I’ve took the advice to heart and set my self on making a change and now life is a lot happier and clearer. So thank y’all and I stick behind what you stand for.

So happy I found your page! I do hair and usually talk is somewhat natural but sometimes, depending on the client, conversation can be difficult. These tools are so helpful

As a person that hasn’t been actively social every day, I found almost all of your videos to contain extremely useful information that I didn’t know where I’d find otherwise. Now I know so much more. I’ve literally spent all night now just watching your vids.

Hey Ben, I just want to say that you are really good at what you do. A lot of people have been commenting about them missing Charlie; but that's probably because of them being more used to him - I can understand that. Nevertheless, you are doing an equally amazing job. Introducing a new face to the audience is never easy, but you DO fit in this channel's theme as if you've been here since the very beginning. Great work and keep it up!

I really appreciate you for making this video! Great advice for icebreakers. I'm usually great with conversation once we get comfortable but these are fast-track comforting scenarios. Good stuff! Thanks man

I love when I learn that I'm already doing something good without even thinking about it and although I'm already doing said thing, I can develop it now that I'm aware.

As someone who struggles with their social filter and for that reason loathes small talk because of the accompanying awkwardness, I appreciate this video.

It's refreshingly different and wonderful when I come across an advice video on youtube that's actually helpful. Thank you for sharing your knowledge about small talk with us, it truly has helped me broaden my social skills and therefore raised my chances of social success. Keep up the great work!

Hi Ben, you seem like a genuinely good person. Thanks for sharing your thoughts & tips with us, hope you have a wonderful holiday!

Just listening to you talk made me feel better today. You remind me of a guy I used to work with and with him small talk was super natural and I loved talking with him. I'm 17 and he was around 20 years old but we talked as if we already knew each other and I must have used all the tips you gave in this video without knowing! I guess it comes naturally with some people?

Just today I had a very nice conversation with someone I didn't know very well and it's hilarious as almost all the points mentioned were present at the time. I'm watching this video just 6 hours after that conversation, and I find it funny to identify each point as a reason why I enjoyed it so much xD Great job dude

Funnily enough, I have tried some of the things in the video and I didn't have much success. There was this girl I met once via a mutual friend that I swear was (and is) the most boring person around. Here's a little bit of how it went: She learned from our mutual friend that I play music, so she asked me about it. I explained that it's the most interesting thing to happen to my life and that it's imperative for people to have an "escape" from reality, where they can do their own thing . In a small amount of time I had given her my thoughts about it, plus a general opinion about people and their life. Plenty of stuff to go about right? Wrong. She didn't have anything to say to that, so I naturally followed it up with: "And what do you do for fun? What gets your life going?" She gave me a half answer: "Not much. Maybe a walk here and there. Maybe hanging out with friends." And that was it. I tried asking her a bit more. I tried giving my own examples, while also trying not to talk too much as to "overpower" her. Then, I remembered that, one day we had gathered with a bunch of friends (herself included) to play card games. So I told her: "Oh, but you were so good at poker at [that time]! I bet you work half-time at a casino or something. She just told me "No I don't." At that point I realized that no matter how good you are at conversation and how much you try to improve, there are people that you just can't seem to get a word out of. It is kind of disheartening, but it is what it is!

Thanks for these tips - I like how you've concentrated on making small talk *fun*. Would love to hear more ideas like this.

thank you my friend Cameron finally accepts me and talks to me now ever since i watched this video and followed ur tips, thanks bro!

I liked your tips. I would add "be fully present during the conversation" because many times I feel like we just don't pay attention to someone so there's just some strange "energy" going on that shows you might be not real interested because you are worring if you are doing right and trying to think about the next question so you end up being disconnected, which is the opposite of what you wanted. A big hello from Brazil. Thanks!

Ben’s teeth are whiter than his shirt!!! Do you drink coffee/ wine?

My go-to-channel on communication is for sure this one! Really informative, insightful and pretty awesome -

Wow! The raffle is such an amazing idea and an opportunity I never realized I wanted; my mind has just been opened to what can improve in area I never before thought to be needed. Thanks for helping me change so much for the better this year. This channel is just AMAZING! Thanks so much for sharing the brilliant advice you do. All the best for the new year to come guys! I look forward to learning more! :)

Wow I love the idea of the guessing game. In certain situations I can see that working really well! Always learn so much from your videos! Thanks :

What about a video on how to deal with Jealousy? That'd be cool. (Not somebody else's necessarily, but your own.)

You have a great welcoming smile which made this video even more enjoyable to watch

Wow! I have watched so many videos of yours in a day. You're doing a good job! Keep it up.

Hey Ben and Charlie! I love watching your videos. I’ve seen a huge difference in my charisma and confidence since watching your videos. I’d love it if you could make a video about how to converse with and brighten a customer’s day when your interaction with them is very short (under 1-2 minutes). I work at Chipotle and while I usually converse and joke with our regulars, I often run out of questions for the average guest apart from “how’s your day going” or “how are you going to enjoy this beautiful day” or compliments. What are some good questions to make a connection with our guests? Thanks and Merry Christmas!

Me: *Makes a Joke* Girl: Loughs a little *Achievement: How did we get here?*

This helps because I am an introvert. I DISLIKE small talk but talk to me about life, what makes you happy, etc & ill be talking for hours.

These kind of videos really do help if you apply them. I can for the most part hold a conversation and not be awkward.

That was a great video! It felt like a 1 minute video. Thanks for sharing the knowledge

Merry Christmas Ben! I'll be seeing family today so I'm excited to use these tips!

Great video. Thank you for the help.

Small talk is such a valuable skill. Thanks for the video!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, Ben & Charlie! I hope that you had a great holiday! ...I just thought I'd share this with you... People on the autism spectrum could really benefit from some of the life lessons that you guys teach, especially in regard to conversational etiquette. Autistic people often have an inability to judge what kinds of interactions are appropriate, and which are not. They have to learn the appropriate responses to each individual situation, and often have trouble applying what they've learn to other situations. I think that the format you have might be helpful to individuals that have trouble interacting on the fly. This'd be especially true if they have difficulty reading facial expressions. Obviously, it's not going to fix all of the challenges that autism comes with, but it could be a step in the right direction towards living a fuller life. Workplace etiquette, appropriate social interactions, how to know when someone isn't interested in your chosen topic of conversation, etc. You guys give very specific suggestions that may help people with autism, for whom simple interactions can be confusing and intimidating. I don't know how you would attract this particular audience, or how (or if) the focus of the company would change if you did. But, it's a whole new target market that might really benefit from the work you do. Could even be an opportunity to do some non-profit work. Just throwing the idea out there.

A pretty good conversation question is “what’s a favourite book of yours?” Either you get some good book recs or you can give some book recs if they don’t have an answer

First-time viewer here. I'm a very social person and meet a lot of people, but often find myself lacking in this area. Found this to be insightful and helpful and very easy to follow. Thanks for your efforts!

how else is watching this on Christmas 2022 crazy how i searched this up and its the same month still tells you how advanced yt has gotten

Oh okay, so small talk is essentially turning a question into a statement.

Dude.... I dont know how I stumbled on this video, but I'm glad I did! Very informative! #Subscribed

yo these are actually so helpful, i had never found tips like these

Thanks man I needed this🙏

Damn thanks for that, because, well, Introvert things like small talk, right?!

Me: What do you do for fun? Stranger: Read *walks away* Me: Well that didn't work...

You improved! Love it! Really happy for you!

i really like this video because anxiety makes me forget how to, yanno, be a person, so these lil tips are so so helpful

I'm so bad at talking Hey Hey How are you? Good, you? Good Cool Yeah Ok Bye Bye

Lol, perfect video for Christmas reunions.

Thanks and Merry (belated) Christmas to you as well, Ben!

Thanks for the wonderful tips 😊🌸🌸 I really like it because I recently immigrated to Turkey and want to have interesting small talk with people.

I'm so awkward that I made a friend by asking, "What's your last name?" XD

I am a project manager's assistant at an architect company, and sometimes I have to go with her to construction sites in her car. I had to learn to hold a small talk VERY quickly. At first, it was awkward, and I felt as if I was in a social experiment (she is my boss and it made everything even more awkward). Thank god she usually has a lot to say, and in the meantime, I can think about questions and what to add to this conversation. It is like a real-life IQ test. It is hard and it is a skill I certainly need to master. Nobody told me that I would have to handle small talk situations when I applied to this job :D

Merry Christmas Ben! :) This has been a very helpful video for me as I tend to have a problem with small talk (not understanding the meta strucutre of conversation or small talk). I appreciate the way you took time to explicitly talk about what is the point of small talk - that helps me grasp why or what is the point of doing is much better than simply here's how to do it better. I also appreciate that you highlighted the tips in yellow boxes to accent your points and make it much clearer the idea you are trying to convey. Something else I noticed in the video, which I thought was very cool, was you seemed comfortable and relaxed talking about this stuff. I am not sure why exactly but it seems something is going great for you. I hope it continues to provide you joy.

The fact that y’all do these helpful videos in one continuous take is impressive

This seems way too hard. I would never remember any of this in the high stress situation of interacting with a human being.

My way of making small talk: "Hey, so I just watched a tutorial on small talk. Can I try some techniques on you?"

It’s funny because, thinking back, anytime I’ve been in a chatty mood and done these things it always leads to really engaging conversation. It’s neat seeing them laid out as tactics like this. Thanks for sharing!

Love all the tips! Im sure i can apply it with my customer ❤️

Merry Christmas! I have a nagging issue that I know you could make a video about. You do a lot of videos about how to be more attractive and escape the friend zone but what I need, as a female is how to be friendly without people thinking I'm interested in a relationship. I am naturally a people person and have never struggled with conversations or charisma, but what I find happens a lot is that it's often mistaken for me being "into" them, when I'm just being nice. I hate having friend zone people, because they ask me out and say I was giving them signs I like them. it makes me feel really bad and I wonder how many times I can get away with saying no before someone takes it badly and something bad happens. Thank you for your time, I hope this gives you a new video topic, have a great day :)

Small talk is difficult because there is not a real subject and goal.

Thank you!

I'm a new direct seller and I just had the worst conversation I've ever been through of my life. And I'm here