the SEX is not better after the tigger (S&M) it is better with the safeword! reclaim the *Scapegoat* or be lost in fake is.Real and Love is not pretending!
I write music, Watch my favourite program Do some writing about my in the moment feelings and be my own best friend. Some journaling by Andrea Hayes books, There’s so much I do to remain cool, calm and collected
*Woah, amazing episode!! 😄🔥 Here's my summary of it:* 🕹️ *Avoiding Triggering* _"Give over your vulnerability so much that they could use it as a wapon, and trust them that they're not going to"_ It's important that both partners recognize the triggers of each other _"If you've to guess what the other person's triggers are, it's like stabbing in the dark"_ - Lisa Bilyeu Discuss with each other what your triggers are, and look for how not to trigger that. 🤔 *What if you've already triggered the other person?* *# Idea 01:* Give each other time and space During moments of stress, nothing that you say will register *# Idea 02:* Pull the person out of that neurochemical state 💖 *Love token:* Establishing, at a time where you both are in a 'loving' emotional state and feeling connected: _let's create a love token. If I ever give you a love token, no matter how angry you are, yo'ure going to remember that we love each other and we will stop being angry_ 🧠 *You're having a biological experience* ◉ When the other person is upset, whatever you do it better be designed to change their neurochemestry. If you can't do that, the conflict is going to just keep going up. ◉ It isn't until you can help them into a new space that yo'ure going to be able to resolve the conflict. You've to shift them into a softer, more open and more connected space
Ugh this is too fuckin true! My partner & I triggered each other so much but we learned each other's triggers as well as our own triggers & now we know how to navigate arguments better. My partner is like Tom, wanting to convince me why I am wrong or shouldn't be upset & I am Lisa, usually needing space to change my neurochemistry lmao! I will literally meditate at times 2-8 mins before returning back to finish the conversation 💗
🙏 *5 Things to Never Do in Rush:* *1) Giving away your trust* *2) Making big desicions* *3) Judging someone's character* *4) Falling in love* *5) Eating your food*
Dear person, who reads it. Yes, I mean exactly you! Maybe we don't know each other. Still, I want to say, that I believe in you! You will certainly achieve your dreams and your happiness! Just don't give up and be honest with yourself! Now you have at least one person who constantly believes in you, which means you are fated to realize your dreams! No doubts here ^) *Best wishes for you ❤️ from a small RU-vidr*
This is so helpful cause soamy times peoples egos get involved and it suits the proper conversation to happen and as well as triggers but at the end of the day to try remember it's all about love connecting as well
Wow Lisa and Tom - I Love Your Guys openness and vulnerability. 👍🏽👏🏽👏🏽😃🌟🌈 I think you’re both Incredible and send you both Blessings of the Highest Good of Every Kind - Thank-you! 💗🌈💗
At around 6:24; i do pretty much do always want to be soothed. 😅 There is not really a mood in which I would not appreciate a hug from someone i am close with. It is like a weighted blanket for me, calms me in under a minute. My toddler picked up on it. Sometimes i will be close to scolding him (raw batter will make you sick! 🤢), and all of the sudden there is a set of arms around my legs. I melt. Doesn't matter how upset I am. The hug also communicates acceptance, which helps counteract the abandonment melange, specifically with a partner figure. Typically when i need a timeout, a hug would resolve those feelings the fastest, because it is the abandonment fears making my heart race. But i know in those specific situations, the other is not often eager to show affection.
I think leaving the room or the situation really helps or even changing the subject temporarily which is also to apply that mentality that you can switch your state. As long as we come back to it later then it’s ok to leave the situation alone for now.
What do you do when your partner is triggered with anything they interpret as an attack.. it could be anything that is not praise... they will get frustrated with almost every conversation trying to bail... then say they are done talking about the topic knowing that I will respectful say let me know when you want to finish the conversation... then they "get over it" (want it to go away) and ignore/refuse to even finish the conversation.... at all, ever... by all means necessary... what do you do...
It cracks me up to see you and Tom struggle with finding a sig out for the show! You guys always give it away that you haven’t gotten there yet!! 😂 WOI has “Be the hero of your own life!” IT has “Be legendary!” But RT is a work in progress!! LOL!!! Y’all are HILARIOUS!! 😂😂😂
My wife has been cheating on me for my entire marriage. So I am the only one who was married Not Her. I should have left her but for some reason I feel really attached to her so I am really messed up. But I do plan on leaving her. But not for someone else No Way My Mom & Thought me better than that. Not to mention when you cheated on you husband and wife Jesus Christ will come to consume everything she has because I did this in my first marriage and o boy was I wrong. I lost everything
Actually I think you're man could be a right little shit at times to live with, I see him as a little self absorbed and punitive in his judgement. Great discussion though love your insights.
On the love token part when he was explaining and said “and you feel like you’re so right which you’re probably not” was like ???? Yikes. It’s never about right or wrong. Kinda turned me off from watching.