I think what's tough is doing the work (support groups, therapy, books) to heal these issues, getting myself pumped up and focused on what I do want, but still feeling like there must still be some block preventing connection. It's ... exhausting. Especially when all I want is to be sitting on the couch and cuddling with someone who makes me feel safe, seen, and values.
This. Everything you said. I've been doing this work for so long and I still feel lonely and disconnected even from my close friends most days. It's like I'm doing everything to attract a safety, closeness and stability that seems like nobody is able to provide. Not even the very best people in the world.
Reasons: 1. You are magnetised to the drama… the dopamine hit and low from wondering if they’ll show up or be distant. Take time after the drama and take dating slow… 2. Your belief systems need some adjusting. Create a new belief system starting with one positive thought and reinforce it over time. 3. An important family member has let you down. Work through and let go of the anger and resentment through counselling and potentially speaking to the family or seeing the behaviour as their brokenness, not your fault.
Wow this is amazing. I just stumbled onto your channel because i saw your name on Multiamory. That was 45 minutes ago and ive been enthralled with your excellent content since then!!! I have to keep pausing your videos so i can repeat what you said and think it over. amazing amazing work thank you for your calm, positive, and clear speaking!!! Also, those are very nice cacti
The family member letting you down is intriguing and so en pointe!!! Through therapy I learned that although a family member did not meet my needs, with the limited tools in their toolbox they did the best they could with what they had to work with. That made me realize that I was not lacking, it had nothing to do with me, and that although their best did not meet my expectations, I was thankful they tried. It allowed me to move on and view that person with affection and understanding instead of resentment.
Yes please. Can you teach us about healing old wounds. Can you please also claridy more and incl more examples to aid our understanding. Thank you so much for these videos, much appreciated
I did my whole life then I went in therapy for many years and so I chose a completely different man. We married. After few months he lost his job and somebody stole his cash savings home and so he ended up becomeing same as everyone else I had before, treating me shit
If I was the one treating them poorly how can I heal and be better for whoever comes into my life next? Part of me wants her back but she is still healing and might never talk to me again but I do feel like the universe might put her back into my life when were both ready for that.
Take a look at my video about childhood trauma. Basically, it’s just how the child’s brain works. It’s not developed enough to understand that other people can be at fault. The child’s brain understands the world in a very narrow and self centered way.
