I "ruined" my life by leaving the software field to pursue my PhD in literature. I started teaching and took my first class this semester yesterday. Cheers to pursuing our passions! This was a perfect video, thank you.
I'm considering leaving the software field job, I put a 10 year mark to do it, at least to take one or two years sabbatical. I'm a second year Anthropology student, I don't think I pursue a job in it either. I also have basic level in Mandarin, intermediate in Portuguese and English (native language is Spanish) besides my Computer Science degree. My sister told me to not worry about leaving my job with my set of skills, those words gave me peace.
@@CrisTryingToBeProductive I've been considering software engineering as well? Is it not worth it? I don't really have prior knowledge or experience in it, I'm not sure I'll enjoy it but I don't know what else to do. What do u think?
@@3N4N hello, as a software engineer, can you give me some advice about my situation that I wrote in the comment above you, it would be really helpful for me
"Yes I technically ruined my life but I'm an ancient history student and I'm in love with ruins" is the best line I've heard in a video in a long time. Thank you for sharing :)
Your statement about not needing to prove your academic abilities to anyone was something I really needed to hear. Thanks for sharing this insight into your life 💖
I would love to hear just a touch more about this. In grad work, it seems entirely about proving academic abilities. Does this mean not personally obsessing or perfectionist-ing about the work, letting what's doable stand or require tweaks? ...or something else?
Seriously, how can people be this insecure about themselves and need external validation constantly? Why torture yourself and ruin the interesting side of learning? I never gave a damn what others think about my academic achievements (and pretty much everything else about me)- it is their problem, after all, not mine. Always have been in minimal effort mode, only doing what's strictly necessary and the rest only if it is interesting somehow _and_ if the time I would spend on it is not better off used on something with more long-term value.
@@AntonYadrov777 some people may have various childhood traumas from the way their parents treated them, which is why their brains are wired to function in that way. If external validation was the only thing that gave you comfort as a child, you're going to keep seeking for it as an adult
“I spent nearly three decades as a people pleasing doormat” I sure felt that one. I didn’t really start being a people pleaser until after high school but it’s something I’m already sick of and wish I could get away from. I’m more than happy to subscribe to you
@@patriciahayes2664 I still am, and I think it is good to be like I am and as an exercise I tried saying no to people and I rejected it immediately, it doesn’t feel right. 😅
The academic jealousy is real. I am the first person in my family to go to college, for both a bachelors and masters degree. As the youngest female member of a Hispanic family, I got the most push back from my mother and grandmother. When I graduated with my masters, I didn't tell my family about my schooling until I was 2 weeks away from graduating. My now husband then boyfriend was amazing though.
Congrats. I was the first female in the family to graduate from college. Took years to pay the debt. Then I didn’t want to take on more debt when I already had developed a career. Always thought I might manage to return to it. But at this point it would simply be a piece of paper. No one ever asked to see my diploma.
I am one of few person in my family to get academic degree. My family members always underline fact that education doesn't matter to be rich, happy and wonderful person but hard work only. But again they forget the fact that you learn all of your life even without attending schools. They are however too pig headed?! to learn from observations or experience. I know they are jealous because of harsh commentary of well educated people if they fail. And most important thing. People always forget how much time does it require to learn. Knowledge isn't inherritated and educated person choose between having a good time or reading and memorazing a lot.
@@patrycjakoniecznaif hard work is what created wealth then most of us would be wealthy! If you enjoy academia then do it for you! When my family criticize my pursuit of my graduate degree I ask if they would have preferred I wasted my life and money being addicted to drugs or working dead end jobs? It is your life, they have their own lives and if they were too afraid to pursue their own dreams that’s on them not you. Dimming your light will not make theirs brighter and I wouldn’t be surprised if they brag about you to others!
@@brigidspencer5123 Absolutely right! No, they more jealous than happy to see anybody at college or university. They were envious when my Mum worked at office, too. Nowadays having Bachelor or Master become a sort of snobbish must and some people sent children to school to only fullfil their own ambitions of being educated. I went to uni becasue it was my dream and my late Mum was my biggest supporter saying "don not give up". Maybe they laugh sometimes because uni graduate have hard times to find a good job but nothing comes fast and easy. Education consumes much time but it is worth of effort.
I turned 30 this year and the vibes and life philosophy you are showing in this video is what I find myself aspiring to: to feel fulfilled, and living a slower life. It was really nice seeing my sentiment reflected in someone else. I love your mythological content and I'm really happy to hear you are in a good place in your life. This was a very uplifting and inspirational video hahaha
‘I’m an ancient history student, and I’m in love with ruins.’ Is such a sentiment that I fully understand. I’m currently doing my masters in ancient history and this hits really hard because I completely understand everything that you’ve been saying.
I'm about to start my degree in BA history, its something that i am passionate and interested in, and yet I'm so so soooo scared that it won't pay off and i won't get a good job from it, but i keep telling myself others have done it, so can i, but to say the least i could do with a bit of a motivational speech😅
After a lifetime as a doormat, I too, ruined my life by walking away from a job, friendships and relationships that just brought me down. Alone has never felt so liberating! Makes me happy to see you do well ❤
You wouldn't believe how happy it makes me to hear how well you're doing mentally. I've been here a while and your mental health struggles are similar to my own, and hearing the pain that you had gone through broke my heart ❤ Best of luck going into your second year!
You are just what i need. I am 21 and I fucked it up my life so bad. So so so bad. I study smth I hate and I want to drop off bcz im interested and talented in tottaly different career. I noticed it just a year ago, while i was crying hating my all life and asked myself "what do I really enjoy and want to do rest of my life ?" It was there for the whole time I was just soooo fkin blind to see it. Now I dont want to waste more of my life and want to drop off uni that I hate. The university itself, the classmates, professors, the city, the dorm, every second I waste on a path that doesnt get me to my true self, I hate it all. I hope I can fix my mistakes, and live a life that is mine. You are my idol.
Not skipping adverts on this one, you’ve literally touched upon my biggest problem that I’ve too scared to face. I’ve been sacrificing my well-being for others to promote their own comfort and it’s brought me crippling anxiety and depression. It gives me hope that things may change.
I ruined mine by exchanging a soul crushing, socially acceptable and rather lucrative career for one as a tattoo artist, which slowly is becoming lucrative but by golly is it light years more rewarding and definitely in tune with my inner self. I now have a role in an ancient tradition and feel a far deeper connection to the history I so love as a result. I get to make living art. 💕💕 Kudos to you for taking that frightening step to traverse the unknown, your truest self was always going to be on the other side of it.
As a fellow self funding, part time PhD student with no cohort - lets be cohort mates! Honestly one of my favourite aspects of the academic community online is the community aspect, especially when you find someone on a similar unconventional path
I really needed this video. As someone who left a career to return to study in my early 30s and now relies on part time work and welfare to get by, it can be really isolating. Especially when everyone you know is buying a house and getting married whilst my mum is convinced I'm going to become a bag lady on the streets. But it is exactly how you describe as well! My mental and physical health have never been better and I've never been happier because I have the time and space to take care of myself properly whilst studying something I really love. So thank you Cinzia for making me feel less alone, definitely subscribing!
I don’t know if it helps, but depending on your country only a tiny slice of people can actually afford marriage, house, kids in any order let alone by the requisite 30. The people who have been most rude to me about these kinds of things have usually been the ones they’re just handed too and they’re projecting.
I also took my Masters degree in my mid-thirties. I was in a pretty intense program, but I loved it and found I didn't have to prove anything to anyone either. I enjoy your videos because you are interested in researching things that I am interested in and you tell a [pretty good story. Aren't the ruins just fascinating?
Happiness is not a destination, but a path we build and walk day by day. Thanks for sharing this Cinzia. Sometimes I feel the same and I can relate to what you said here.
Your new life is going to cost you your old one. I always called it “have to light my life on fire” but I’m happy for you! I’m so happy to see you being so happy! I’ve followed you for years and the old not spending videos to now, even the way you talk now is so different - the confidence in your voice and self. Love this for you ♥️
I completely ruined mine as well, the interesting part is always the how. Good news is that, with enough work, a life can certainly be un-ruined. Mine wasn't so much spurning advice and making different choices than what others had suggested, but instead something all together more destructive I'd wager. I know the story will end up well because anyone with the fortitude and drive to deal with a RU-vid audience has nerves of absolute steel.
"I'm very much in love with the ruins of my life so far" is one of the loveliest things I've ever heard 😭❤ This whole video is fantastic, I'm so happy for you.
I'm in my mid 30s and have really struggled with where I am in my life the last few years. I basically put a full stop to my professional career while watching my friends make big strides in their own and it has been really difficult. Recently, I've been doubting my choice to put myself first, but your video really helped remind me that life isn't all about the corporate rat race and to take joy in the things that bring fulfillment to you. Thank you and best of luck on your PhD!
I blew up my life to go be a librarian and I've never been happier. If I won the lottery tomorrow I wouldn't change anything in my life. Seriously. Invest in yourself and you won't regret it.
girl, im happy that you are happy about your life but living paycheck to paycheck plus savings is not sustainable in the long run. What if you fall ill? what if you're kicked out of your home?(i suppose you dont own it but hopefully im wrong). Do you have a support network if the worst case scenario happens? Ngl, just the thought of running out of savings by your 30s is stressing me a bit out. I hope this was exagerated bcs i'd be living with anxiety turned to 200% every single day.
I "ruined my life" by quitting a job that supported my partner and I and helped build savings, to start to try and build a career in a 9-5 job. Any career, I wasn't picky. 50% paycut. Since then I have had time to build multiple hobbies and make friends who genuinely want to spend time with me. I don't hate my coworkers or managers anymore, and I actually feel like they respect me and my time. I feel less stressed about money, weirdly. I am physically healthier because I've been able to gain fat and muscle. And I was able to be home for my cats every night. 1000x happier despite the troubles it brought.
I really love your podcast. Thanks for sharing this part of your life and experience. My career was a self employed professional puppeteer. I didn't get rich but I survived. I loved what I did and it brought me a great deal of joy and satisfaction. Best wishes to you.
Thank you so much for making this video Cinzia. As someone in their fourth and final year of a PHD in Old English literature I couldn't agree more. There's so much in terms of just personal growth and development as a scholar that has happened in the course of this which I would take over the career advancement I could have been pursuing otherwise. I often hear so much negativity from other people doing humanities PHDs so your video was a ray of light
As an author and literary editor about to ruin a "productive bullet journal entrepreneur freelancer" way of life, thank you for this video ❤️ it takes courage and a certain peace of mind to be able to let go of expectations (and money lol) and realize that money, time, opportunities etc will come and go, and we have the power to shape our own lives. I guess age has a lot to do with it as well (also in my 30s). Also, hope your youtube income gets to a sustainable level soon, your thumbnails have been really cool lately! Rooting for you 🙌
Allowed my narcissist Mother destroy my life repeatedly. Gaslit me & everyone else into thinking every incident was my doing. Nope. I had no control. Didnt deserve any if it. Set me up by smoking weed w me when i was 12 do she could get rid of me. Troubled teen re-education camps. Narcissist mothers hate their daughters. Its the most unnatural thing in the world. People dont understand or believe it. They just always took her word for everything. I didnt know the picture she was always painting. Recently figured out she will talk to two people in private about drama but never together. Because she's telling us both completely different things in private. Opposite things. Causing strife. She's so bad, if u are in her way, she will set u up and have you arrested or taken on a mental health hold or claim youre on drugs. She's done it to more ppl than just me. Had fun beating a woman up and sending her to prison for attacking her. My mother was the attacker. Then she plays the disability card for her lame leg.
I’m in the same boat. My story is kind of similar yet super complex. I hate to say this but, after watching this video, I find this woman quite privileged. In fact anyone who has autonomy over their lives and can share these stories on RU-vid are lucky. I want to do that but my narcissistic mother has put me in a very complex situation and if I share it online it could implicate her and my other family members. Even if I have to live other people or work a low wage job I’ll take that. Have a narc mother isn’t worth it at all 🙅🏾♀️
I came here just to berate you for having that giant bookcase talking about your life being ruined. I'm 5 seconds into the video so I have no clue what this video is even about.
Wow, this one hit hard ❤ I can't say our situations are that similar in practice, but "the vibe" is very similar. I had a drastic change in lifestyle in 2021 (thank god in my case the people close to me were supportive) and looking from the outside, it might seem like I "messed up" what used to be an ideal situation. And it was! I loved my previous life, but the thing is, what I have now is better for the current me, for my mental health, it fills my soul even if it doesn't exactly fill my bank account lol Sending good vibes and following ❤
You have no idea how much hearing this helped me. I am considering leaving my corporate job (for a while) and I have been working only part time (with the other part of my time doing what I actually want to do) but I have troubles making the leap into the unknown. Somehow, after listening to you, it has started feeling much more "right" as to say, to finally do it. So... thank you, and good luck on your journey 🙂🍀
If you can, DO IT. I left a corporate job that was eating me alive a few decades ago. While I do occasionally think "what if I hadn't?", I look at what I've done. I've run my own business. I've taken some low-paid jobs that I *wanted* to do. I took classes in what interested me, and got certifications in things my community needed someone to work in. I moved into the country. I got married (again) 15 years ago, and am getting ready for a 16th anniversary tomorrow.
I relate to so much to what you said. I ruined my life by starting a PhD 3+ years ago. And even though I was fully funded, handling the cost of living crisis whilst also renting in London hasn't been fun to say the least. Tbh I count my decision to start a PhD as the single most financially ruinous event in my entire life and I'm still kicking myself over it. I know most of us romantic, idealistic types like to think it's all worth it if you're having fun and learning new things but the bottom line is that while my peers were getting married and getting promoted and earning a handsome income, I was barely surviving on below minimum wage and getting more and more depressed by the day. It didn't help that I had a very rude awaking about the realities of the academic careeer path. Most of my post-doc colleagues were living project-to-project and dreading the time their funding would inevitably run out. Then they would have to start feverishly applying for more funding (with no guarantee of getting it), or agreeing to move half-way across the world for another fixed-term post-doc. Not to mention the mental toll of the publish-or-perish mentality and the expectation of having basically no free time as you're constantly expected to either be publishing, submitting revisions, applying for grants, or doing more research. I'm now in the process of quitting out of my PhD and finally starting to breathe easy again.
I appreciate how much courage it must actually take to put all this out there. I myself am not going back to school or anything, but I think your outlook here is very transferable to a lot of other people's different situations in life. It's helpful to hear, so thank you!
Yay! I'm so glad to see that you're starting a second channel for productivity and academia related things. I've always loved your perpective on those things. Your 80% effective video helped me so much❤
Sometimes we need to "ruin our lives" to find "ourselves"! I'm glad you are finding your path to your happiness! Your example is inspiring! Thank you! xx
You discover who your true friends and family are when you can no longer do anything for them...when you develop a seriously debilitating illness, are unemployed for a long period, become bankrupt, etc. Your fair-weather friends and family will invariably disappear from your life.
I hear you! One of my two biggest mistakes was not thinking my family wouldn’t be jealous of me . The other mistake I made was expecting people to have the same standards and values I did and was often depressed by realizing how often I misjudged people and was taken advantage of. How often I treated people kindly but treated badly by the same people. Hopefully I have learned from these experiences too.
I'm quite younger but I am also doing an unfunded PhD part time (against pretty much everyone's advice) - while pursuing some sort of a career in something completely unconnected (sports). While it's far from easy all the time, especially financially, I am so immensely grateful for the intellectual freedom and the sense of purpose it gives me. Moreover as you said, this way of "doing" academia is also preventing me from research being this all consuming endeavor. Lots of people (phd candidates or graduates) have told me when I applied "you will see your PhD project becomes your entire personality" and I always found this prospect terrifying. Of course my project is a product of my personality, but my personality reaches much further than that, and to be able to expand it across so radically different skill sets and social environments feels like taking the growth bullet train. Lots of people, the same ones, have also promised that I will surely get depressed in no time. Believe that I know a fair bit about depression, and the past year has been the first of the past *decade* where I moved through life without its weight on my every decision. I am about to start my 2nd year (so, the second part of my first year!) and I am still as motivated by my project, first chapter written and incredibly excited to move to the next step! While every story is worth telling I am glad to hear one that resembles mine, and I hope this voice will reach whichever ears need to hear it.
Howdy do, Sweet pea! Don't worry if you did "ruin your life" because we are still here for you! I have been a loyal subscriber since I first saw a video of yours about a year ago. I am 100% sure that we will help to "build you back up" I, too, am a youtuber (bookish youtuber, although be it I have only 154 subscribers atm), so I know that you have courage and guts of steel to do anything you wanted with your life! I have made many choices in the past where I did well and truly ruin my life, but you can always go on to bigger and better things! We believe in you, and we really do love you and your whole personality! I have notified for when this video starts, but in the mean time, I am sending you all my beautiful bookish (and personal) love to you (all)! 💞Lots of love, Dolly xoxo
I'm sad that you've experienced people not being supportive during your PhD and even being competitive. That's the exact opposite of my grad school experience. Incredibly supportive people including fellow students and advisors as well as friends/family. But glad to hear you're feeling so much better
I throw in a shit ton of tea bags in a pot with a shit ton of honey, cinnamon, & powdered cloves and then I'll put that in the fridge and keep using it till it's lost flavor, I know the struggle, love your work you're brilliant keep on keepin on❤
when u said "i've honestly never been happier" at like 2:24 and smiled :''') omfg. i could feel the happiness through the screen. i'm so happy FOR u!!!!
Yeah I completely understand. I pushed myself really hard to study and when covid happened in 2020 I dropped out of school and switched to the online schooling which didn't pan out I moved in with my girlfriend which then turned into an abusive toxic relationship. I started drinking to cope with the stress, lost all my savings having to provide for bills, my relationship kept furthering and stumbling into a hopeless deathride of resentment toward her personality disorder and schooling while working. I guess once I got rid of everything and have gotten the substance abuse under control, left my abusive relationship and got a job I enjoy I've felt much happier. I'm probably gonnna join the state guard and do part time school at my own pace. Its difficult out there these days. I'm only 26 and I feel like I'm 40 lol
this video is new and random to me, just popped up on my youtube i definitely do relate to the "ruining my life" part. I definitelly have ruined my life by going to college and attempting to get a phD myself. Eventually i quit and started to work in the industry. It was the right thing for me to quit and realized i was going in the wrong direction. Generally speaking, im glad i have what i have now. But i think if i could go back i would not do everything the same way. I ruined myself, which helped me find myself and rebuild myself - which is a good thing. Checked the relationships i had, learnt how to deal with having no money and lots of stress, etc. However, i also ruined my health and that is something im still working on with many many doctors in an attempt to fix it. I just want people to know that pushing yourself can be good sometimes, but also some things cannot be fixed. So ruining certain things in your life, like health, really shouldnt be taken too easily. I thought that I just had to push myself until i succeed, and i succeeded with a cost.
This was so nice to hear. I’m a theology and media student. Most people only equate the value of higher education to the amount of money it’ll get you after. So my degree is pretty much nothing. I couldn’t be happier with it lol
I’m so glad to hear you’re well and feeling fulfilled. A few years ago I started writing in-depth reviews and analysis about the books I was reading and it has been such a great journey for me. People don’t really understand why I spend the time doing it and often some people are downright rude about it, but I love it. Thank you for putting yourself out there.
I’m so glad to hear that I’m not the only one who does this! I’ve only shared this with a couple of close people and luckily it’s been an overall neutral reaction from them.
This is the first video of yours that I've seen and I already adore you. I also took a hard left turn and changed my life in a way that my family would call "ruining my life" and it was the best gift I've ever given myself. Looking forward to more videos and wishing you all the best in life.
I relate so much. Jesus Christ. I could be making some serious money If I'd just give in to hustle productivity culture but.. I chose to work less and earn less. I chose to invest in peace of mind, just like you. It's been the best time of my life (I'm 29). My days of crying on my wheel and risking my life on traffic accidents are gone. The days of being exhausted to the point of nausea, of working while sick, of feeling on alert every minute of every day .... Gone. And I'm glad now I only worry about bills.
Hello Cinzia! I've always enjoyed your videos and content. I've been following you since your old channel, where you shared parts of your life and talked about sustainability, budgeting, etc. I'm really sorry to hear about what's been happening to you. However, I do admire you for making the right decision for yourself despite not finding the support you would have liked from your close ones. Thank you for bringing this up. Envy is something very real and I think we should be careful in trying to find a way to deal with other people's negativity which doesn't affect us so much. To be honest, I sometimes think letting people go who don't support you in your journey can be worth it. And the money that you're spending can be seen as an investment. Maybe one day all the effort you're making right now, which is undoubtedly a sacrifice, will pay back. I'm proud of you! Wish you the very best from Buenos Aires! x
I just found your channel and am already enjoying it. I share many of your philosophical outlooks and congratulate you on choosing to live your authentic life. I’m 60 and followed a traditional life that put others ahead of my academic potential and personal fulfillment. I don’t regret this path, but as the world changes, the rewards I have worked toward are rapidly disappearing. Are you concerned with the threat of AI to employment in academia and your future prospects to provide a living for yourself? I just found out I’m losing a job that I spent 35 years upskilling for due to the “promises” made by AI to be able to do my very complex work. How do we protect our mental health from life changing (sometimes life destroying) choices made by multinational corporations, universities, governments and small businesses? I’d love a video with your thoughts on this topic. Cheers from Chicago!
Yes! Welcome to the club 😎 I’ve identified as a professional failure for more than a decade (I’m now 35) but it’s only been the last few years I’ve managed to reflect on my findings and really started to live. Brilliantly imperfect.
Paused @9:06 I was just about to say how you haven't ruined your life and what people tell you is balderdash and piffle cake with BS icing. Then as I was about to say, you've never been happier, and so bloody well good for you. I completed my MA while suffering from clinical depression, anxiety and recently diagnosed ME/CFS. The department were so understanding and they allowed me to finish a couple or three projects/essays and then my thesis. The head of department then offered me the chance of studying for a PhD part time. I couldn't get any funding, and decided that my health would not permit me to study and work part time to support myself. There were no savings, rather student debt. What ruined my life was my own stupidity and inability to cope with the stress caused by the pressure I put myself under, which ruined my relationship. It was the break up that caused my fall into depression. Many years later I look back and realise my life wasn't ruined, though I still regret blowing my relationship and missing out on the opportunity to study. "This too will pass"
This resonate so much with me. I had a,similer journy. The 20s is when I found myself, I went to uni just to please family, and then found how I struggled. The last 15 months I am also off the pills, and I found how to say no to those who hurt me, and the need for them came away. In the end at my 30s I am juat more me.
Cinzia, you have grown into yourself and become what you were meant to be. From that comes calm confidence, and all the things you describe as having left behind or excluded from your life were the things that were holding you back. I’m delighted to see you in such a good place. The advice you offer here is so spot on. It’s important to treat your own life with utter respect, just as you describe. Wishing you well going forward xx
Oh yes, I remember how threatened people (particularly men), would become when they heard I was a PhD researcher- always wanting to pit their intelligence against mine to prove something to themselves. It became very tedious!
I really enjoyed your video's content, save one thing. The one thing that bothers me is this whole trend of people saying their life is "ruined". As someone whose life has been objectively much, much worse than yours, (abuse, disabling chronic illness, bullying, estrangement, long term unemployment) I involuntarily bristle at the use of that phrase, even in jest.
try being a heroin addict.. now that's ruining your life. 12 years sober and I'm still dealing with the consequences. Don't ruin your life with drugs kids.
Now I need to listen to this whole story!! And 24 hours is a long time! Also wouldn´t mind if this is clickbait, I like what you do. hope you are doing great Lady!
40 total videos, 13 of them public, and over 16K subs. I'd say that if you keep at it, you'll be able to shore your savings back up relatively quickly.😀
Cinzia, you are so inspirational because you are a true lover of knowledge and also you are totally real; you are a hard working adult, and a brilliant one too. It will all pay off. 💪
Interesting journey so far! Is that a blessing or a curse, to wish upon someone 'to live in interesting times'? My journey (so far) has been 'interesting'... I didn't get a PhD in Biochemistry - because I insisted on staying at the uni I was comfortable with instead of finding a professor who actually understood my work. I didn't get a PhD in Operations Research / Management Science - because that year, due to budget cuts, the department wasn't offering any stipends, and wouldn't take any students without one. I didn't get a PhD in Computational Chemistry - because, so I was told, my application literally slid behind a desk. Instead I got a (useless) MBA and wound up a professional programmer - because I learned to do so as part of a graduate research project. However, by no doubt most people's assessment, I've had a successful life. On an entirely unrelated matter, Cinzia (I'd love to learn the history of that name), I've a project that re-imagines the founding of Rome myth such that it would lead to an alternative universe where society is egalitarian. I've tried to find someone familiar with the myths to get feedback on what I've written and wondered if you might be that person.
I've never heard of you or yur channel before this very evening. RU-vid recommended me this video and I clicked beacuse of the tittle. No regrets. I'm on my early twenties, the world is unfolding to me as a full grown adult, I'm starting my career and things don't seem to be going where I want them to. That's why i clicked you video, somehow deep inside of me, I want to "ruin my life" and be free from career, from spectations and from people expecting something extraordinary from me. I just want to not have to prove myself, to be able to study whenever I want, to be free from a very deep depression and expectations. Maybe yeah I must ruin my life too! Fuck what other people think of me or what I do. They're not me, this is not their life! That's why your video touched me, that's why ou have a new subscriber, that's why I'm glad YT recommended your video. Thank you for your wise words, thank you for putting things on a different perspective and talking about them. Thank you Cinzia!
This has been wonderful to hear! You are so fortunate to have made these discoveries and activated them in your life in your30s! Many people don't figure this out until their 50s or 60s, and many never do! Whenever we discover what we need to, and wherever it takes us, it's an amazing journey. Cheers! 👍💖
I adore history and ruins as well and sometimes a different history comes about that was never anticipated but we go with the flow and accept the lidar and carbon dating that makes things much older than we ever thought! History gets rewritten at times ...it is always exciting!🌟. You suddenly popped up on my you tube inexplicably .. ...but it was very interesting to listen to your journey! Congratulations! We are always a work in progress aren’t we?🌟
I ruined my life by going back to school to get a PhD in what everybody considered a dead end subject with no job prospects. Now despite all odds, I'm a professor and get paid to teach and research stuff I genuinely find interesting. It's kind of amazing.
Having started my PhD three years ago, this mirrors so many of my experiences! The jealousy, the people who think your time belongs to them! But also the glow up in the relationships we keep. Thanks for putting this so well, I'm so glad the algorithm brought me here
I've ruined my life twice within ten years: first by cutting my ties to my narcistic father and thanks to therapy found what I really liked instead of the Bachelors of Chemical engineering and that is social work and especially being with teens and young adults teaching daily tricks for mental health, stability, emotions and to top it off I can still use my bachelors as I've started tutoring kids in maths, physics and chemistry also. I'd rather be happy and fulfilled instead of rich and miserable. The world gave me signs like the pandemic to keep me away from engineering.
I love this. I totally understand. I'm racing for a championship on a motorcycle with an extremely limited budget. Also caring fit a special needs foster daughter. I get mocked and contested by the higher money guys regularly. But keep turning up, keep beating them, keep getting the results despite not being to afford practice time. Also at times I'm driving 2k miles back and forth in 3 days to do these races by myself, your videos have been highly entertained and enlightening. Keep it up! Anything you do I approve!
I personally love your academia-related content, and the study with me concepts. I’m finishing my bachelors in interior design, and am preparing research for my entrance papers for a masters in museum studies. all of us students need to band together and help eachother out. it’s tiring, difficult, and quite lonely at times.
Thank you so much for this! I’m another part-time self-funded PhD in Classics and it’s wonderful hearing someone else having similar experiences! Know EXACTLY what you mean about people not understanding that you’re still working when you’re at home - constantly having to explain to mother that I can’t take a random week off to sort her house out, even if I’m “just at home”! You’ve given me some great ideas for things to keep my mental health (roughly….) together while trying to get some work done!
Wow, I didn't know you had this channel, just popped up for me in suggestions. But it's nice to know some backstory for the lady of the library haha. Blog content isn't really my thing so I don't know if I'll watch it, but I'll give it a sub anyway, just in case ;) stay beautiful chick and good luck with it all!
Way to go Cinzia! I relate to most of what you talk about in this video, so I get very happy hearing you talk about your mental health, relationship and passion being in better shape than ever before
I'm so glad you've found a bit of happiness in your life, Cinzia! My journey into my 30s has been similar in that my career goals have shifted a little in the short term, but I'm finally making real progress on my longterm goals, and I'm learning to be satisfied with the life I have. I'm so glad you're doing well!
