I Tried Living My 'Perfect' Life (and broke down) 

What are your 3 Ps?

To anyone who says that "Rebecca isn't relatable anymore", because of her you now have a lot more girls inspired to do content like this, to film their recovery. If you want the old Rebecca, you are welcome to watch her old videos as many times as you please. Btw love your content Rebbeca, keep the real you and don't change for anyone except yourself❤️❤️

I think public recovery accounts are TOUGH. The reason being is that your entire audience didn’t start at the beginning and grow with you. You have people in low places just finding your content now. They can go back and watch your early videos and then see a recent one and not understand the 1+ years in between. That demographic is here for inspiration on how to recover- which is disordered to begin with because they are vicariously recovering through you and not using or seeking professional help. At the end of the day, you aren’t the same person who started this channel. You have come so far and it isn’t fair to expect you to go back and make content that reflects your early recovery period because you aren’t there anymore. It’s nice to see you in a place where your life is more than food and disordered bs, that’s the goal! Don’t stay stuck in your disorder to please your audience. That is not fair for you at all.

First off: WOAH! THEY'VE GOTTA BACK THE FREAK OFF, because you are so relatable, and so helpful, and I have not seen anyone more like me with your recovery...!! Every day I watch you is a better day than I the days I don't! Don't lose confidence in getting better! If you're not relatable to someone who's in their earlier stages, that's their problem. They can choose to take what they can from your experience 😏

I haven’t even watched this yet and I know I will love it x

this was really helpful. thank you rebecca

Your voice is so fricking beautiful.

This was such a REAL video. And made me feel way less alone as I am trying to do the same thing with my life right now.

Rebecca I literally LOVE YOU!!! Breakdowns are ok, don’t worry, you’ll get through it!!!! You ARE good enough!!!!❤️❤️❤️

WOW!!! You’re singing voice is amazing!!!!

you can't make everybody happy. Focus on yourself but don't worry about figuring everything out quickly. It will all happen naturally if you let it 💕💕

You and your boyfriend has to write a book , cuz you are having a incredinle thinkinh . Your boyfriend gives extreme good advices as a outstander and you rebecca , you gives an amazing view how it feels being in a problem and how to deal with it . Please write a book . I mean it serously , I would definetly by it.

This is incredibly relatable. I feel this way so much. YOU ARE RELATABLE!

Can we just take a moment to appreciate Rebeccas voice😍😍

my three p’s: procrastination pro recovery pencil

idk if this is helpful but maybe instead of working out in a gym type setting you could try less ‘direct’ forms of excersieze, like team sports or dance class or yoga or something like that!? xx

This is the most recovered video of yours I've watched. You're truly recovering and you know it because your videos don't center around food and fears anymore. The whole idea of recovery is to have your own life and a greater purpose than getting better because eventually you reach "better". I know that failing to approach "better" can be really addicting too. It's scary to actually recover for so many reasons. In the end it might be because you don't know who you'll be in the world or what you'll do without the anorexia. You are such a genuine, vivacious seriously talented human. That will give so many more people real reason to get better. Watching other people being scared of food (which is very legitimate and thank you for capturing this so accurately!) can't really help anyone recover after a certain point. Today I have a very physical outdoor job, am a distance runner, and energetic because of choosing to live after anorexia. Thank you for what you do and portraying a healthy, unique, and realistic recovery! You're doing incredible! So much love from CA :)

Tyler has this specific look when he’s really listening and ready to give sound advice around the 5:00 minute mark. Everybody needs a person that listens, but doesn’t always agree, and instead, tells you straight up what you NEED to hear.

how tf are you not relatable???like hun, because of you i got lots of motivation for my recovery

CHEERED when i saw you doing weights! I'm so proud of you!! Isn't it empowering to feel so strong?? 💞💓💕💖💗

First! Rebecca on the piano? We already know this will be a great video 💕

i can’t wait to watch this!!! it’s impossible to live a perfect life ! i’m so proud of you for showing this. i hope you are well ! xx

and also, I'm totally here for the longer videos😍

"You can be the ripest, juciest peach in the world and there's still going to be someone who hates peaches". Your videos have helped me beyond words. Seeing you thrive in recovery and living a life outside your food and ed thoughts has shown me its possible and worth it. When your open and honest about struggles and doubt, it comforts me to know i'm not alone and that even the people we look up to still have these moments and aren't always going to be positive. That person might not find you 'relatable' but there are so many people who do. I relate to you always wanting to be positive and feel happy, I am that person for so many in my life and it can be hard to adjust when how we want to feel isn't how we actually feel. Thank you for putting yourself out there, thank you for being open and honest - not everyone will engage or understand your content/who you are but the ones who do (and there are many) will feel immensely for what you share - whether its enjoyment, humour, inspiration, feeling understood/not alone, etc etc. Don't water yourself down to make everyone happy, focus on your own version of happy and be the best peach you can be. Thank you again

by the way, i’m LOVING this new content 🤩🤟🏻

Yaasssss dat intro is everything love you ❤🧡💛💚💙💜.

The quickest route to failure is trying to please everybody ♥️

FIRST

You don't need to be "relatable", you just have to be yourself and be happy ^^ love from italy Ps. I wanted to ask you a question, maybe it's a strange one but who cares ahaha how many languages do you speak?

This is so relatable.. But you know, there's nothing wrong with wanting to be productive etc, but the idea of a perfect day just sets the bar too high, and then it will always be disappoiting. We are all human, so things just aren't perfect. Some days we can be super productive and social and some days we are sad or tired or just sit on the couch all day, and that's okay

it's all a part of the process 💕 you know that your journey will have its ups and downs and it won't be easy, but you can do it! you have friends, family, tyler and bear, and your subscribers rooting you on!

We all feel this way at time, Rebecca. Some more often than others (like myself). I think you’re awesome. 💖ok...Tyler summed it up so perfectly towards the end. I’m astounded. He’s so right on target, I cannot believe this. I needed this today.

🙏 See, this is why i really appreciate your content Becc. There is no such thing as "perfect" but somehow we tend to get stuck in this stereotype forgetting to just listen to our souls. Thanks for that reminder ! ❤️ Also i feel like I NEED TO say that Tyler is such a good person. I really love how he treats you (of course we don't see everything). But i really like when at the end of the vids, you show how even in moments of doubt and fear he always has a calming word for you, not necessarily going your way but just the good word for reassurance. I hope i'll find someone as genuine, smart, caring and up-lifting as him.❣️

I still struggle with disordered eating, but seeing you doing more “normal” things makes me happy, knowing that someone can rise out of their disordered habits and thoughts. I think you’re definitely relatable!

rebecca you are my motivation, thank you for everything!

Love this concept! I do the same thing. I'm learning to be kinder to myself but it takes a lot of work to not let that fake perfect life get you down.

God I relate to you as a person so much Bec. And you are not lazy. I've been saying the same to myself and my boyfriend just straight up laughed at me saying I am, it was that ridiculous to him. It forced me to actually think about it and I realised we keep telling ourselves that we are because we have this crazy unrealistic perfect ideal in our head of everything we should do and everything we should accomplish. But jesus, shouldn't we live to enjoy our lives? Have dreams and goals, but let them be a source of inspiration and hope, not stress and anxiety. ❤️ We should find a balance and remember that we do not have to preform and be productive to be valuable as human beings.

Do you think maybe you could do a hair care routine? Your hair is absolutely beautiful!

WHO ELSE LOVES REBECCA BTW I'm a small RU-vidr!

You’re getting SOO good at editing! You work soo hard on your videos and it shows!

Eventhough you may not be relatable for some people. Only real people will love you in the way you are. Therefore if people comment this they dont care about you and you should just ignore them. We love you 🖤.

Don’t worry about trying to be relatable, you have helped me SO much in my recovery and seeing people at different stages of there recovery is so helpful, and has even pushed me to get new places in my recovery, showing me a life of freedom. Even if your content isn’t about ED or isn’t as much it still serves as inspiration for me and many others to keep pushing to get to that point where we can trust ourself and our bodies’. You are a light 💡 keep on shining and take some time to just give yourself a pat on the back for all of your content, your amazing message and your progress in your recovery journey. 👏🏻👏🏻 you are amazing 😉

I'm earlyyy! Haven't watched yet, but I'm so excited for this video! ILY ❤️❤️

Dear Rebecca you are very lucky that you have such a nice and understanding person besides you, I always admire how your partner speak about many issues in a nice way (like in this video about idea of 'perfect life' or happiness), it seems he did psychology as his major :) Did he?!

bec just wanted to let you know that your videos are so original and funny and relating to people like me. you are such a nice person who fights even tho she's scared to death. you hep a lot of people with your videos and your stories! and also DAMN how is tyler so inspirational in all the things he says. like he makes EVERYTHING so clear !!! love y'alllll

I am from Germany and your English is so good and understandable. Love your Videos.

Didn't know you could sing!

Omg you and J Lou are friends, we need a collab 💖💖you are doing great

I love Tyler being the level headed one all the time and being so supportive you guys are my favourite omg

Bec i love you loads, dont worry your amazing, you cant make everyone happy its not possible!! Your helping me so much in my recovery but make sure you focus on yourself as well xxx

don’t care too much about these negative kind of comments, you have no idea how much you helped me with my own recovery BECAUSE you are so relatable to me and open about your experiences & feelings!! 💞💞 lots of love

Ur so inspirational. Thanx for being honest and natural xx

I'm so happy for you and that you are doing well in recovery. Maybe you could still do a few recovery videos (like advice columns or tips like the video on your ig account with the cookie butter haha) if you feel like it, I think people would still appreciate those, but other than that for your own mental health, if you feel like it is time for you to move on and start working on other parts of your life & making videos about it, please do so 💙 the further I got in recovery the more i discovered underlying issues in my life that needed to be addressed within myself, i feel like i might be in a similar place as you, but just know that that's the whole point of recovering. i appreciate that you want to make us happy as well, but ultimately i hope you choose what feels best for YOU.

with your video i realized i put too much pressure on myself to have “what i want”. i feel way more relaxed now, thanks ❤️

you are helping people💗

You work so hard!! You are relatable to me, no one can relate to everyone? You grow... you find your people.

honestly one of the best videos on youtube i kid you nottt

well, you not being relatable is bs. i relate to so many things you say/experience and thanks to you i’m doing little steps towards being mentally/physically healthier. thanks to you I start to realize that so many things I fear are totally ok. of course I don’t feel completely comfortable with u talking about exercice but who am I to judge that decision? everyone needs to know if it’s ok for them or not - it triggers me but that’s something I have to learn. but what’s even more important is that you feel great. you are important, not how others percieve you. 💌

You know, this may be your most (personally) relatable video yet. I'm always so upset with myself and my lack of productivity (such as with watching this video now) even though I should be studying, but well...food for thought. And food for me, because I'm also in recovery.

You can’t make everyone happy. The real love from REAL supporters, that want to see you do well, is all that matters. I always call myself lazy and maybe I am, but all you can do is work on yourself, and move forward. Much love. Love your vids girl. You help me constantly as I’m kind of going in a spiral with my ED. We love you ❤️

you are never going to make everyone happy but the real fans want you to be happy and will be happy with what you do. we love you and want you to be happy!!!

Okay I’m going to keep this short and sweet but I am in the same place. Feeling very down. But you are inspiring, don’t listen to anyone who tells you otherwise. Your whole Channel is a journey that people can follow. They can see how far you’ve come and know that they can get there as well. Never stop following your dreams, doing what you love and being yourself. You. Are. Amazing. Never forget that. Think of where you were last year to where you are now. You have not been sitting doing nothing!! You are constantly doing amazing things❤️🌹

I started watching your videos because I was looking for help with recovering from my ED, I continue to watch because you are truely one of the most creative and driven youtubers I have seen! Your content is hilarious please don't give up on yourself! Your ED is not going to always be your focal point. People watch you because of your captivating personality! Keep making videos and believing in yourself please

I just found your channel, you are absolutely amazing. The things rhat you have done to challenge your eating disorder I couldn't have done in a million years. Really inspired. Going to challenge myself right now

Girl ... you are not just relatable, you are REAL, which I believe is more important. You had your life defined by the eating disorder. And you walked through the actual process of dealing with it, and part of that process is actually finding out what life means without the ED since it is not your life anymore. I didn't get into hospital because of my eating disorder - actually I was considered a success story because you see, I was 50+ overweight and doing very unhealthy things with laxatives and cigarettes and exercise, I lost them and got to be "good looking" and everyone cheered me up. I only realized that I have an eating disorder from watching you. I saw a strong and introspective girl who explained her mind, her truth and her feelings and identified with them no matter the different context. And I struggled with you. And succeeded with you, and laughed and cried with every video. And when you started to branch out and didn't know how to go on with the channel and your life with every new video, I was like "holy crap! That's so true! The reason why I continued with my ED after I got "skinny" is because I didn't know how to live without it." I might not have a youtube channel, but like everybody else, I have a life and I want do my job and live and have my passions come true, so you do you girl, because that is real and inspiring and very beautiful to watch. You will lose the path if you try to make "us" happy and relate. We watch you because we want to see another person going through what we go through and actually find a way out. We are all in this together ... please please please feel all the feelings and go through your tryings, but don't get into a new version of the ED, which is trying to figure out what we want and do it. It is like trying to figure out what the ED wants and no body wins that way. Remember we are all different but the same too. We don't know what we want either. Trying to make us happy is a losing battle and you know this battle very well. The ED will never be satisfied no matter how much you listened to it, and you won't make us all happy no matter how much you tried because we don't know what makes us happy either. But if you figure out your own life and took us along with you, then you are our sister, our friend, we are a family with different paths and countries and stories yet we will be so lucky and honored and inspired to witness your journey. From a far a way sister whom you might never meet, but who spent nights and days talking to your videos and feeling understood, inspired and most importantly, not alone. Thank you for saving my life.

J LOU! i'm so happy that y'all have met, what a small world! :'>

we should be celebrating that people with anorexia no longer relate to you. it’s important to see the difference between a happy healthy person, and an anorexic person. for me, i used to not relate to you either. and that helped me realise what were my ‘bad habits’ and helped me criticise my ed. without you, i couldn’t tell if my thoughts were me or ed. NOW i can relate to you, and THATS how i know i’m recovering well :) xx

something that might help is remembering why you want to do those productive things or creative things, you like that version of yourself that does that and she is taking care of you in some way. Maybe instead of thinking of those things as tasks you NEED to do, think of them as self-care things you do because you WANT to and that watching RU-vid can also be a self-care thing.

You will always be an inspiration to me, you were the first recovery channel that I ever subscribed to and the most honest. Since then, I have discovered an entire community of amazing recovery channels on RU-vid and I'm pretty sure many of them took inspiration from you. Everyone has permission to move on and progress, anyone who thinks you shouldn't do that, they're not being supportive. You can't help everyone unfortunately, but you have and will continue to help many many people. It's time for you to let go and start enjoying recovery for yourself, you give me hope that one day, I can wake up and not have food be the main focus of my day. I still have so much time for you, Tyler and Bear and I feel so proud to see how far you have come xx

i dont have an ED nor am i recovering- im here for YOU. your personality, perseverance, and real take on life is fab. dont forget that you dont owe anyone "relatability" or any kind of content besides the content you choose to produce becaucse at the end of the day this is YOUR recovery. your recovery isnt capital to be consumed by others

Pets. Pizza. Playfulness!❤ :) I am always SO hard on myself and just because of that perfectionist thinking I make myself miserable, angry and unhappy - dissapointed in myself. With that video you made me think - I need to let go of perfection and just do what makes ME happy. LOVE U ❤

Hey Rebecca! I love that you share your true thoughts on your situation and how you're feeling! I also struggle with thoughts of not being enough most of the time at the moment. Don't you worry about trying to be relatable. Just be yourself.Honestly, as I started watching your videos, I always wanted to be just like you.. You always seem so happy and positive and super strong. I still believe that you are that way, even more now as you show your vulnerable side as well.Thank you for making such great content (Honestly I have liked everything you've made so far)PS: I believe Tyler should become a life coach and do videos himself.. He gives such good advice wich not only helps you but us as well!Love you guys!

ignore people that are saying rude comments you're amazing and you worked hard and you helped lots of people with their recovery and specially me and it's all because of you 💞 thank you Rebecca don't listen to the haters 💛

You are helping people! Like girl you are making such huge strides in your recovery that is something to celebrate if you recovering makes you unrelatable then people have insane opinions on what is relatable. you are helping people to see that you can get to a point of normalcy don’t let dumb comments get you down you have and are inspiring so many people if they don’t want to see you grow and different content to then they aren’t true supporters I mean seriously what do people want you to be in a loop of failing in recovery because that sure as heck isn’t what any supporters want we want to see you being yourself happy healthy and enjoying life and what you do!

Rebecca you do not have to please everyone, remember that this is your channel and so many people love anything that you post! You are such a light and still helping people even if it’s not directly ED related. We love you ❤️

I'm so happy that you've made this video because I struggle with perfectionism so much & I feel exactly like you - the more I try to be perfect or live a perfect life, the more unhappy I actually feel. It's something that I know yet I keep on struggling with it. It's nice to see I'm not alone (it's not nice to see you struggle though). I know you are putting a lot of effort into your videos & I just want to let you know that it's enough, you are enough. RU-vid might have become a job but aren't we doing it because it's fun? Please just have fun.

What even is perfect???

It’s so sad that people comment things like you are no longer relatable I relate to you so much Rebecca and value your channel and help so much you inspire me in more ways I could measure

Rebecca, please believe me when I say that your voice is amazing, I would pay to hear you live

Rebecca, you are so amazing and we will support you no matter what. It's your life and you need to do whatever is best for you. You inspire me every day and please keep doing whatever makes you happy! Lots of love

my perfect life includes waking up whenever my body wants to. I love the feeling of waking up nqturally and being fully rested. that means I sleep 8hs night and wake up at 8 am aprox. JUST DO YOU REBECCA

You cant make everyone happy, so just focus on the most important person - yourself. ❤ Love seeing you grow, and would rather watch the content you want to put out rather then content you think you "should". 😊

You’re amazing! You have helped me so much, don’t ever think you’re not good enough or not important, because you are! I believe in you 💕

I have to say I really relate to not feeling productive enough and beating myself up about it. It’s something I’ve been struggling with and makes me less productive than if I were to let myself relax sometimes

You have become one of my favorite you tubers. fuck the people who say otherwise

i love you SO MUCH rebecca

Please don't feel like you can't get better and better because other people might not be able to relate anymore. It's good for people to be able to relate to somebody, to know they're not alone but you and your health are the priority.

i feel so bad that you felt bad about people no longer feeling “relatable” abt ur videos... you do you and the true ones will be supporting u no matter what! 💕💕💕

Lol my first impression of your banana was a slug covered in mud.

2:13 REBECCA OMFG

Yesss excited for another video :)

You make my day better, Rebecca. Thank you. I love you. ❤️

You are so talented with music!!! Your voice is absolutely beautiful❤️❤️

You ARE helping people. Your helping me and everyone else watching this 💞

There needs to be a compilation video of Tyler's different video endings lol

The editing on this video is incredible!! I’m so happy you are branching out from purely Ed related videos, we will all support whatever videos u like to make xx

Rebecca don’t beat yourself ... you are amazing and watching ur videos make me feel like a proud little sister 🤓💜

We need more singing videos! ❤ You have such an amazing voice ❤

These two are such a blessing. They give off such amazing energy, and the ending had me dying lmao

I love all your endings! Yes and everyone's journey is so different. I'm sorry to hear about that comment. Maybe that person is struggling to in their own way and doesn't see eye to eye with you at this time. Does that make sense? That doesn't mean you arent helping other people! You are you're own person, you have you're own struggles, but you also have to make yourself happy first sometimes Selfish thing to say but it's not a bad thing. Recovery is first priority I have learnt that overtime and still working at it. But just know when the time is right, you'll get there. You dont have to figure it all out now! 😊😊❤🙏🏽