Is It Fair to Expect Women to Always Be a Man’s Peace? 

Not every man wants a "spicy" personality and that's okay. That doesn't mean they’re insecure or feels threatened. Each to their own.

No it’s not. Men (primarily black ones) keep throwing out “I want a woman to be my peace”. That’s nonsense. Half the time they aren’t creating peace yet have this demand of women. What they tend to mean by that statement is: don’t question me, don’t challenge me, dont have a problem with anything I’m doing, don’t share your opinion, say yes to everything I say.

Expecting someone to your peace is a lot to ask. Find peace and happiness, your partner should just be an addition to what's already there.

What happened to people having peace within themselves before looking for it from someone else?

I agree "the woman has to bring the peace" is tired. Both should bring peace

*WARNING TO MEN:* If a woman wants to be beaten by you or other men, _STAY AWAY!!_ You’ll either go to jail for abusing her or for trying to protect her. If she tries to start fights in a club, in a parking lot, in the house, in the car, in the laundromat, at Walmart, at church ... Walk away. Literally walk away from her AND the relationship. None of this “holdin’ her down” or “ride or die” BS. *trust me* It’s not worth it and _she’s_ not worth it.

No one can be/bring/give you peace. Peace comes from within. -- Whoever's energy helps you sustain your inner peace is a compatible match. 💖

I'm not hard to handle or deal with first of all. But I love a take charge man who will tell me if I'm wrong and basically put me in check from time to time✅😂

IT GOES BOTH WWAAYYYYs … let go of the gender and treat people like you want to treated .

A woman ñeeds to be a man's peace,and a man needs to be a woman's peace.As simple as that,a relationship works both ways....... Let me edit this...My point is everything works both ways,stop putting it on women in this case,to be the ones being peaceful.Your partner also has to bring the same energy.We already know 1 sided behaviour or effort dose not work well in relationships.

Do men EVER bring peace to women’s lives?

No, simply because no person can be anyone's peace just like no person can be anyone's happiness. It's all about how you mesh or clash.

Loni is GLOWING! I love that she does her own makeup 🙌🏿♥️

If you are expecting someone to be your peace or only source of happiness that makes you codependent ! The only thing that makes a relationship is two whole people coming together to make one whole relationship

I agree with Adrienne If u feel like expressing opinions to your guy is going to be seen as "yapping at him" or nagging him or be construed as you starting an argument, that's not a person that respects you and your voice and the relationship should end. But unfortunately that's what a lot of egotistical people want, "yes" people that are going to flatter them all the time and make them feel like they are right even when they are not.......women deal with this a lot more than men because so many religions say standing up for yourself or speaking your mind to your husband is a sin no matter how wrong his behavior may be.......I do NOT believe this was God's TRUE intention but the toxic patriarchy has tainted everything including religion. It's sad that so many women are basically treated as children instead of the grown women in marital dynamics and told to be silent and serve their husbands without resistance or question .......don't bring him any problems etc etc.....meanwhile, he can bring you all the problems in the world and you are supposed to do nothing but withstand it ALL with a smile on your face and calm forgiving reassuring words.....it's cruel and unfortunate.......I do agree with their comments at 3:21. What about women's need for peace does everything have to be about fulfilling a man's needs.??? I think it's arrogant for men to expect women to be their peace and place of comfort....It's like, sorry dude, my name isn't Jesus Christ.......that's His job

I already have peace within myself I don't need a man for that.

The only Man I look to for peace is JESUS; and the peace He gives me divinely enables me to identify any person whose presence in my life seeks to erode this peace. Then I cut the person off and love him/her from afar if he/she is family; and if they aren't family, then I wish them all the best in life and move on. That's how I guard my peace. Thank you Jesus 🙏🏾😊

Adrienne, LOVED what you said and you looked gorgeous saying it. That was a great perspective ❤️

If a woman says, “I need a real man who can handle me”, then that’s not a woman. That’s a child who still has temper tantrums and emotional issues that need to be dealt with by a psychological professional and a religious leader (if you believe in any religion). If a man says, “I need a woman who can be by my side to help me be the man that I know I am”, then that’s not a man. That’s a child who’s been enabled by his mother or a female authoritarian. He also has issues and needs help from a psychological professional and spiritual/religious leader.

I’m a lot to “handle” on my own, but I am all for peace in my household. I make it a point to approach life differently when it comes to my husband and my son. They have enough to face when they leave the house everyday. Why add to it?.. On another note, is it just me, or is Adrienne getting prettier as she ages? 🤨😍❤️

Garcelle stay be saying little freaky things that everybody misses, lol.

Define yourself Adrienne...I loved it

I have gone on several dates and been labeled difficult because I asked questions and I think through everything, and I definitely have unpopular options most of the times. It’s taking me a long time to understand it’s not my fault, maybe these men are insecure or simply aren’t for me. I have been advised to not be myself because men don’t want an opinionated women. I have others who find me fascinating with the same qualities but it just didn’t work. At this point I don’t think dating or marriage is for me.

I’m with Adrienne on this, I think they meant it in that way

Tamar Braxton is a woman who has to constantly be handled, and does not bring peace.

I need my daily dose of Jeannie beans!

Garcelle was like...why her!?!🤣

To be a man's peace, he has to be her peace also. ✌🏾

I think both mutual people need to have peace within their selves and then come together. Don’t go into a relationship knowing you have a bad attitude or like Loni said “nagging all the time” and by doing that you are disturbing the other person’s peace. And there should be a clear distinction between being a confident out spoken person and just being a rude mouthy headache WHICH GOES FOR BOTH SEXES NOT JUST WOMAN. Because sometimes people like to confuse the two or act like they are confident when in actuality they are just a loud negative person

loved Adrienne’s point of view

Absolutely loved this hairstyle on Garcelle😍😍.... Her hair pulled back 👌👌

There are a lot of immature women who feel like being contentious is a sign of strength. They will _forever_ have problems. Can’t let yourself get dragged down with them. And ain’t nothing “passionate” about them. They’re hostile and damaged plain and simple.

100% agree with Adrienne on what she said.

Garcelle's ponytail is the cutest! I love this. Just wanted to point that out.

Miss Jeannie bean 😞Great convo ladies

Why does Adrienne try hard to push the “spicy sassy” personality lol. It’s cringe sometimes

Expectations on either gender isn't fair

I LOVE 💕 Real Talk Kim. Although, she’s actually a major pastor/preacher with her own church. I also agree with her to an extent.

I love this conversation because being in relationships where a man is like “you’re too much for me to handle” is a lot… but finding the man ( been with him for 5years now) he knows how to handle my attitude, how I want attention, know how to deal with me without being disrespectful is a huge blessing! Honestly I just feel like it’s about finding your right person, cuz everyone was not made for everyone!!

I saw the quote as if he can't handle who I am, all of what makes me me, then I won't bring him peace nor will he for me. If that's the case we are not compatible as this will bring more issues to a potential relationship.

We all crave a certain amount of certainty and uncertainty. Too much uncertainty is chaotic. We need to bring peace to one another

You can look at that statement in different ways. When I think of being able to “handle” someone, it might just be “can I deal with this personality?” Not everyone is compatible and that’s okay. Some people are intentionally difficult, but the reality is that we’re all human and we’re all different. People are attracted to different things and what one man can’t “handle,” another man may desire and go looking for in a woman.

Your perspective is refreshing.

This topic went WAY over all their heads.

Loni always had a friend lol 😂 love Loni ❤️

Men like peace for the most part, no one want to come from working hard and deal with bs at home

Adrienne looks so stunning 🔥

“Why her?” That was so shady, hahaha.

I am, by default, non-confrontational. I don't go out of my way the stir things up, or look for arguments. With that said, if my man expects me to be his source of peace that isn't going to work. I get that people have stresses and want to come home and relax, but if I am his only source of relaxation, do you not know how much that can take a toll on a person. My dad for example, he was diagnosed with MS when I was 11 (I'm 30 now), through my teen years, my mom, my sisters, and myself tried to make sure he wasn't stressed out. But it got to a point where it felt we couldn't have bad days because he would be like "I can't take this, right now" or "Well at least you can still use your legs". Or we couldn't show that his sickness had an affect on us too. We couldn't be too happy, because it reminds him how he couldn't do certain things. It just became so much that none of us really have a strong relationship with him anymore. I applaud my father for living with this disease and trying to keep pushing, but he should go to therapy or support groups and not dump all his stress on his family.

Date people to see who you match up with... she said it best.. date.. nowadays people are settling for anything and being lonely in a whole relationship or being lonely emotionally or spiritually or mentally or be still struggling financially in a whole relationship.. so idk but date.. get to know people and see what is best for you

I be swiping and looking

Yes Garcelle preach!

Adrienne looks so good! Gorgeous Mrs Houghton! Absolutely gorgeous 😍

I'm tired of hearing it as well!

Confidence and being too mouthy are two different things

Loni lies so bad! Lol

You are so so beautiful Adrienne ❤️

I don't think "handling" someone isn't just about being opinionated. In that case you want open minded and compromising. Handling implies taking control regardless of opinion. Very 1950ish.

When you about peace , they are about craziness!

i wouldn’t say handle, but i like when my man asserts his dominance. and he doesn’t have to make a big show of it either.

I agree with Adrienne which is rare

Speaking as a man, we don't want women that we have to "handle". It's not attractive, it's not an endearing quality, it's not someone that you want to be the future mother of your children. His women everywhere saying this comment as if it's something that men actually want.

Let's go to truth ... The Lord said that He is the Person who is our peace full stop. We are to support each other in walking with Him and embracing His peace.

I think y’all taking “be his peace” too literally. I think men just want a woman that doesn’t add drama to their lives and can maybe help him with the drama that’s already there. That’s what that means to me.

"Be his peace" to me is no different than "happy wife happy life". Its just a saying that is a healthy mentality if done within reason and boundaries. Nothing to get too bent out of shape about.

I love you ladies. Good topics. Everything y’all said I agree. Ladies get a man that respects your thoughts and can handle your opinions. Two, don’t swipe! Also “hide” your secret photos iPhones have the option. ☝🏽

Lonnie funny asl 🤣🤣🤣🤣

At a point in life and growing old one wants ones spouse to be like this is who I want you to be.

You need to be your own peace ☮️ never depend on anyone other than God to bring you peace as people will always disappoint

I'm with Adrienne. And for me if I man is going to "check me" then he needs to be able to do it without exploding or belittling me. He will have his peace as long as he doesn't disturb mine. My client wanted me to take a picture of him in his new work uniform to send to his girlfriend. In the preview frame before I took the picture, I saw a picture of his thumb. I thought to myself, "Why would he take a pic of his thumb"? After taking the picture I realized, that wasn't his thumb.

I think "always" may be overkill. But generally speaking, YES!!! Why do our feelings as men not matter? Why can't people understand that there are things we desire as men that draws us to women, that makes us not gay? And the thing we desire is not something daunting or superficial. It's simple, practical, and has substance. And it makes for a better character and a better relationship. But yet, we can't ask it. Why should we dedicate our lives to someone like that?

How about being compatible, supportive and a person of integrity. If you are those things your partner will trust your opinions when you have to " check" them...and when having a hard day your partner can love up on you and be supportive.

What Adrienne said

Two diff conversations. It's not about a Man getting physical, most of the time women mean, "can he handle my sassiness/attitude". I don't agree with being sassy, it's not a cute trait, its immature. I also think that being someone's sole reason for peace isn't your job. However, if you love a Man you should WANT to be peaceFUL to him. Loni is an extreme feminist, not everything has to be man vs woman. She has such a disdain for any ideal in favor of Men.

Not swiping when someone shows you a photo is a given.

What adrienne is trying to say is that some men want women to just stand in the background and not have an opinion. Not their fault, let's look at history. Women weren't allowed to be educated or have opinions. Some men are still like that. When a woman is strong and opinionated, it bothers them.. times have changed. There are some men who like that about their women. All your Negative comments about Adrienne possibly stems from jealousy because there was nothing wrong with what she said. No one wants a boring woman that just sits back, has no opinion, is told what to do or say. That's what she was trying to say. Also it's personality. It's not drama..

Okay Loni ✌🏽✌🏽✌🏽

Realtalkkim can’t even keep a marriage so let’s consider the source

adrienne looks soo pretty , love her updo

Calling it now Adrienne is 🤰🏻

Everyone spoke clear facts 🫰🫰👏👏👏

Adrianne talking about herself.lol

"If he don't hit me he don't love me." Know some wimmen like this that if the guy don't they will start some ish.

Why does it sound like @allthingsadrienne is speaking of herself 😂😂

If I’m too much to handle then go find less…✌🏾💜

Loni been low key trying to play Adrienne lately

I think someone isn't always peaceful. but most of the time? yes

I seriously be ready to throw hands on someone when they start swiping when I just tried showing them one picture. You going to disrespect me to my face because I have to be standing close to you to be handing you my phone

Women are not animals that need to be handled, your parents should have taught you how to “handle” yourself. She looking for her DADDY, not a husband. 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

2:00 I agree, that is all really important for me. Most of the men I was in relationships with could not handle me. They were each shy, insecure and needy. But everything Adrienne said applies to what I am seeking in a man. My last relationship with an alpha male didn't work, but I loved that he knew how to handle my strong opinions, personality, quirkiness and communication style. He never once pouted or gave me the silent treatment following a disagreement. Cell phones I have seen some crazy stuff on phones!😂🤣😂 I get D pics all the time and my friends do as well. Wow!

Be peaceful, yes. But, your whole peace comes from God and the work you put into you.

Right it's sad. Alot of eomen think if a man doesn't hit them they don't love them. Or they're not a man. And anyone I have dated are too insecure. I am a Tomboy and I dress in a way I get more attention from men. And I don't let men call me out my name.

I'm not a child to be put in check or a animal to be handled. I'm not a pick me but I'm also pretty no nonsense as well. A man for me can have conversations with me about what they see same as I will with him. Its not checking. Its being adults and making accountability for what we do or say a thing...

I had a women her kids played with mine she is sort of ok that her husband isn't afraid to smack her upside the head i used to think she needed my help to get out of that situation I quickly learned that shes ok with it because she too is physically abusive and is the one agitating the situation a lot of the time.

Adrienne looks so gorgeous..I meaan

You ladies amazing, I give best my son dad tells I lose act That way .I not pretty he feels so sorry me and if was Hally Berry he remembers all Holliday everything what do ladys?

Tails from heart

“Handle” is such an aggressive word. I agree with Garcelle that your partner should put you in your place when necessary. I like what Adrienne said about your partner “handling” your personality, but that is just not a good word to use here. It makes it sound like they tolerate you instead of love you.

*You can't be a mans peace if he is not at peace with himself!*

I don’t need a woman to be “my peace”, but don’t be my chaos either.