I dealt with a life coach that was a complete narcissist. He thought he had all the answers and was never wrong. As long as everyone agreed with him he was nice. As soon as you saw through his con and pointed out anything he would turn on you and turn others against you. And by you I mean me. He was a false preacher that believed in Prosperity Gospel and Law of Attraction. For a pastor, these things are incompatible. So glad to be out of his control. Beware of life coaches that think they have all the answers, for nobody can know everything.
I believe in the law of attraction and practice every day but I can tell you after trying to connect with others, 99% don't understand how it works. They think- oh If I just sit here and envision the BMW, it'll appear in my driveway magically. That's not how it works. The law of attraction does 2 things: First of all it helps you focus only on the good things in your life so that the bad stuff isn't a big deal. For example, when I had a car accident, I wasn't mad at all. I focused on the positives- that nobody was hurt- and it wasn't a stressful situation at all, and I was able to happily go about my life, rather than dwelling on the inconvenience and trauma of it. Second- it gives you motivation to keep going and keep working to be able to get the BMW in your driveway. I really wanted to be self employed and debt free. So I lived my life in abundance. I had the attitude that I was debt free. I enjoyed simple luxuries- I pretended that basic things were luxurious. And I am now debt free. But it takes work, not wishing and magic. Pretending I was living in luxury gave me the motivation every day to get up and triple my sales and my income. So while I pretended I was super rich for drinking coffee and eating bagels, I was paying off my bills. How did I make coffee feel luxurious? No, I did not buy $4 Starbucks every day. All I did was set the timer on my coffee pot so that it was ready for me when I woke up. It made me feel like it was being served to me. So very simple things can put you in the right mindset to achieve those bigger goals. And I'm rambling because it's covid and I never talk to anyone and all my friends are cats. :)
A lot of doctors who don’t neither. You can be anyone and not have your life or finances together including billionaires. Life Coaching is much more about helping people overcome their limited thinking and align themselves with their core values.
This video is gold! It’s a pleasure seeing your humor come through. I’m literally laughing out loud. I’m studying art therapy & my dearest friend is a licensed clinical psychologist. We have had this conversation countless times. I really enjoyed listening to your perspective on this topic. Keep up the good work!
I think on the maturation side of things your concerns might be conflating the role of a counselor and a life coach. On the problematic end of things this is certainly true... but only if a life couch is trying to be a counselor. Hypothetical example: Let's say you have a retiree who spent his life in efficiency and business improvement careers. He has industry certifications like Six Sigma and other trainings that combine with his MBA to constitute more than 8 years of traditional schooling. In his retirement years, he opens a life coaching business that focuses exclusively on time management and on site physical home/work organisation using internationally-recognized efficiency programs. One could argue that his professional life experience is better suited to providing that specific life skill than going to a therapist and that getting a counselor degree would not help make him a better life-organizer.
I think this kind of cross-discipline coaching where a coach with experience in a very specific life skill specialization (time management, organization, etiquette, personal style, home economics, etc) is probably the best scenario that this industry provides.
@@DrGrande I don't think that minimizes the cases covered in your original concern... it just provides for plausable alternate cases that are not so problematic. Your point is still valid in many cases: there is a definite danger of people confusing their passion for something with expertise. There is no substitute for experience. Along those lines, a criticism that you could have levied in this video is one of continuing education. In most cases in most places, regulated certification-based service industries require regular ongoing training to remain current and sharp in the profession. Unregulated services like life coaching do not have this requirement so it is much easier to be "rusty" or "out of the loop" regarding advances when it comes to unregulated fields.
@@DrGrandeGreat content! There are a lot of scam courses out there but i want to become a coach helping ppl who are suffering with stress. i have spent thousands on courses including studying online with a world class therapist who has now crossed over into coaching. I've spent years in training but i don't want to cross over into mental health. Were would you say the line should be for me to recognise the difference between some1 suffering with stress and some1 with mental health problems?
@@lagerandapacketcrisp stress is a mental health problem. I'd be very careful about the way you offer your service and the sorts of advice that you give regarding stress.
Coaching job is like holding a hand of someone who has decided to become somebody in life, such as profession, or striving a business goals, personal achievement. And, in my opinion, that is absolutely fine. As long as a Coach doesn’t enter the area of profession of a Mental Doctor, psychology or any other specialist of this industry, than it is perfectly fine. Coach in my opinion, it is a bit like a Priest vs School Teacher. Both are important for the society, but one holds a degree, the other, not. However, there is space for everyone in this world. I think, they compliment each other. Anyone of them, keep people, out of failures, disappointments, crime and try to fit some people who doesn’t know that they are valuable for them selves and their loved ones. If you have a passion, love and patience, good communication skills, and you are CRB checked by the authorities. You are mentally fit, have no record of crime, than you have clean integrity, you should practice coaching by all means. At the end of the day, it is just a service, and if you are not good at it, people will find out straight away, therefore you will be out of business. But, I do agree of some of the points and concerns, the honourable Dr is talking about
Life coaching and therapy are not the same by no means. I have never given advice on anything that seems to develop layers. I always advice a therapist or psychologist depending on the nature of the issue in question. As a certified life coach, I only deal with strategy, and building goals that would have a client stuck, in terms of their work and life goals. Anyone who goes to a life coach should do the research of knowing the background of a coach to know the extent of their scope and work. I get a lot of clients that think they need coaching that really need therapy, and I advise them to seek a therapist or psychologist, because they are educated in dealing with layers and damaging behavior and how to process information and how to overcome those hurtles. It's really important to know the difference, to understand the help that one needs. I also don't like that people can just rise from the dust and call themselves a coach, I know a few coaches that are not certified life coach or has no training and I often worry about the outcomes of their session, as well as their frame work.
There are 2 weeks training coaches. Ask questions. Course should be 5 weeks for coach to have a full understanding of childhood trauma, cptsd.. Michele Lee Nieves Maria Ayers are awesome certified life coaches
7.45 'You harness the energy of the universe, that's a lot of energy, what do you do with all that energy?' and then you say 'I guess you can use that power to move people you don't like out of your way' I really adore your dry sense of humour, it's subtle and it's delivered with a strait face, it's gets me every time!! :) Also thank you so much for not adding stuff like 'no pun intended' as I find that is such a lame way of making jokes that you have to say it out loud that you made joke, if you have to do that then you should stop making jokes.
Life coaching seems to be a new term designed for people to earn an income under a guise of "life experiences" that will help other people guide their lives. Not to discredit life coaching, I do believe that those seeking those type of services need to look at the credentials of that person to ensure they are receiving the help they need. I agree that Life Coaching and Mental Health Counseling cannot be compared to each other. Being credentialed is key. I am very leery of those that claim to be Life Coaches but some of these people may be able to help those needing it. It would just depend on what support is needed by the client. If needing services, always check their credentials and be sure that you are obtaining the services that match your specific needs. "Renting a friend" is one way to definitely look at this life coaching view. Being cautious is key.
There were many good points that Dr. Grande pointed out about the new information to me about life coaching. I didn't realize that life coaching was its own entity and that someone could simply be a life coach without any training or much accountability. I would think that with life coaching, it could be said that less education could produce less results because life coaches don't seem to be as informed as counselors. It is unregulated which relates to the lack of accountability and it seems that anyone can be a life coach and would work based off of their own experiences to "help" a client, which may end up being more harmful than not.
I totally agree! One way that all of the "murkiness" associated with life coaching could be cleared up is by giving the profession a concrete definition (we provide services x,y, and z). Preferably, one that does not attempt to provide the same services as counselors -- but if they still insist on doing so, life coaches should be required to explain the certification process they underwent in order to earn the title (i.e. hours of course work, accreditation procedures). Also, it is our job as informed consumers to ask such questions.
I think people may veer away from mainstream professionals when they become vulnerable in some way. This seems especially true, when another practitioner of some importance to the individual, offers something that appears to be more in line with the individual's needs and wants. Vulnerable individuals succumb to arguments and medical or psychological care that seem plausible or effective but in fact are flawed and not substantiated.
I am a clinical psychologist and retired psychology professor. My dsughter in law got mixed up with a life coach who was a saleserson for a herbal shake dietary plan. My daughterinlaw was a RN. Huge mistake...
Some if not most of them I believe are. Otherwise how can you be so over-confident, at least on the surface, as of to take responsibility for sb's life.
Have a look at dr grande's post about mental health professionals who have mental health issues. He states that a huge number have narcissist tendencies and these are trained professionals. I think that you need to check a lot of things, qualifications, recommendations and how you feel about your counsellor yourself. Even if there's no issues with the counsellor, you just may not gel. It's about yourself, making choices, being proactive in your wellbeing and who you're comfortable with.
I am an educated professional. Hired 2 coaches on separate occasions. One had a professional degree!! Both lacked integrity and were only accountable to the money and not me as an individual. It was a huge disappointment. "Renting a friend" is an accurate description. The friendship only lasts as long as you pay!
I felt that way about counselors too. My longest relationship with a counselor was 15 years, and even with his PHD he was a sham and high on the Narcissism spectrum. Some counselors are worth it, and some coaches are too.
My experience of life coaches is that they encourage you to make bold decisions by building up your sense of invincibility. The actions are all entirely at your own risk, with absolutely no risk to themselves either financially or emotionally. I do believe in being in harmony with the Universe, but I wouldn't pay someone to tell me to jump off a cliff in order to see how harmonious we are.
I am a coach, I have a psyche degree and I am a trained counsellor. But I have chosen to be a coach. If I have a client with mental health issues, I stand aside and advise my client to approach their GP or I will refer the client to mental health services myself. I find it immoral and unethical to work with a vulnerable person who is in desperate need of a mental health professional.
Ann P Tully : Exactly. There is a legitimate place for well educated life coaches. Many of us hold other degrees in helping professions. There are some incredibly ignorant responses to Grande's original post. I decided to stop frustrating myself after reading a few. Anyway, yes, refer to mental health those who need a doctor. I agree. And let intelligent adults choose practirioners who produce RESULTS. Marriage counseling has failed miserably.
@@raymorrow1491 If I may draw an analogy, why might someone work as a sports coach or personal trainer if they had an MD? Although the more regulated work requiring the higher degree of education and license may be more respected and well-paid, it may not be the preference of the individual to do that sort of work, to work with that particular population, to work for an institution, and/or to comply with the ongoing requirements of the more highly regulated industry
I had 2 free sessions with a life coach through my work and it was a positive experience as it was tailored to professionalism & growing in my career. But this video did talk about distinctions that I wasn’t aware of!
My sister in law was a life coach for awhile. She had been unable to get a real job because she is a completely self absorbed little narcissist, so life coaching was a perfect fit. Now she’s a financial advisor😂
God it’s like a plague at the moment these life coaches, i just watch from a distance with my popcorn as to how stupid humans are buying into this scam. It does annoy me the coaches actually making good money though
"renting a friend that can be supportive" LOL it is SO validating to hear you say all of this. I USED to be friends with someone who is now a life coach. She RIPS people off & me & her ex husband have been wondering if she is a narcissist & definitely feel like she is. But she believes her own shit! Exactly how she can be unscrupulous. She thinks she is awesome at life but she lies and she lost a best friend and her husband, which apparently she wanted to anyhow. She sucked. Thanks for doing this.
Big scam in my opinion. The coaches I've met were intellectually underwhelming. I think those who want tp help people can study psychology, social work or even yoga. But something completely unregulated, no. And evenen someone with a degree may suck at the job.
A lot of coaches I have met cannot prove excellence in anything they coach. They fall short in all aspects of their coaching. So I just don't understand, how can you coach if you aren't a living proof of what you are coaching? I don't mind getting coached by a real estate Billionaire of how to make real estate deals, or by a doctor of how to take care of my body. Even that, some will not be accurate, but at least the chances are better if they have mastered something!
@@Dareen.K Right? They'll "help you build a successful business / build your dream life", when they're broke and struggling themselves / their life is a dumpster fire. Make it make sense!
It's extremely scary when a "life coach" goes around claiming that their "client " tells them that they saved their life in order to promote themselves. Sounds grandiose, self serving, controlling, manipulative and very narcissistic! Look how many are floating around You Tube looking for vulnerable people and donations. It's really disturbing in my book.
If feeds a person’s ego for others to look up to them and listen to what they have to say. So for those with self-esteem issues (like my cousin), it feeds her need for validation and to feel important.
@@thecarlitosshow7687 There’s inadequacies the other way too. And because of insurance companies, a practitioner can charge higher rates than they’d be able to otherwise.
Great topic and insight. Life coaching seems to be the show business off-shoot of mental health. That aspect perhaps couldn't stop you from using dry humour in your usually austere delivery. Really interesting Dr Grande
"Harness the power of the universe. Well, that's a lot of energy. What would you do with all that energy?" Omg, that delivery! XD Dr Grande is so unintentionally hilarious sometimes. So f***ing cute! 😍
I see a lot of bias in this video. I also see lack of understanding how the coaching is working and what it really is. You are mixing motivational speakers or some really 'interesting' specialists after three hours of training with real, solid coaching practice . My advice would be to understand first thing which you are going to speak about instead of talking about it from one particular point of view. I belive that this relation between coaching and therapy is a spectrum and in my mind it boils down to the question - what is health? Is it only lack of illness as therapist are looking at this or it's something more? There is whole part of psychology full of people who are talking about potential of human being like carl Rogers, Abraham Maslow, Alfred Adler from whom coaching practice is taking a lot from. Coaching has theoretical support in many areas of psychology, not only psychology but also neurobiology. To understand it better there is a great book - 'Coaching with the Brain in Mind: Foundations for Practice' I highly reccommend it to really go deep in this topic instead of just gloss over it.
You know the life coach is bogus when they give advice. The whole point is to pull the inner resources out and allow them to work techniques and processes in order to make more efficient choices in their lives.
You clearly don't understand coaching if you think giving advice is a bad thing. The majority of modern therapy is sadly majorly flawed and of little use.
@@melymichu6731 As a therapist, I have to disagree. Therapists do two things: they bring out traumatic events for healing, and they teach new, healthier coping skills. The latter does involve “giving advice.” We may be cautious in how we present the advice (e.g. what if you tried this instead of that), but rest assured, it’s still advice.
@@Longtack55 If the client had the "answers/solutions", they would not be paying someone upwards of $100, to go there. Most people only go to someone else, when they cannot solve their own problem.
I really wish there was some outside sociological research or studies on the industry so that evaluations on Life Coaching (positive, negative, and nuanced) would be less anecdotal than they are currently.
We are talking about an industry that is completely self certified, there are no regulating bodies establishing standards and practices or accountability. It's like New Age practitioners operating with licenses from various schools
"Renting a friend" did make me laugh because I was anticipating that response to come out at some point in the video due to the route it was moving towards. I have heard of life coaching, but I never would have compared it to counseling in the sense that if I need professional help that I'd go to a life coach. I can see where a life coach would be beneficial for some, but if someone is truly struggling with mental illness, it is best to seek a counselor. Thank you for the video!
I was once inspired by a life coach who motivated me to be positive with everyone. With that positive attitude I approached a malignant narcissist, and then I managed to survive. Trust me, it was a bad idea!!! And now I'm negative with everyone!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I went to a life coach for my anxiety and depression. Felt better in five sessions and felt almost healed in ten. I got tired of the traditional talk therapy. After twenty sessions of venting and "how does that make you feel?" I got annoyed and knew I needed something different.
The challenge with mental health professionals is that, since they are human, they each have a different style. I have had 3 or 4 that I only had 2 or 3 sessions with and then switched to someone else. It is hard when your counselor retires or moves and then you have to look for someone new. All that just to say, they're not all the same.
It can be very true. However, there can be licensed or educated professionals who act unscrupulously and ineffectively as well. While they might be in possession of a license or within the boundaries of regulations, they can still act inappropriately, scam people, and the like.
I’m applying to grad school for counseling and you took the words right out of my mouth. Excellent video with well put information. Keep up the videos, they are very informative and explanatory.
1000 dolars an hour is nothing for the knowledge on how to harnes the power of the universe. Then you can earn bilion dolars an hour. Do you know how much gold one asteroid holds? Or how much energy sun emits. And that is only 2 bodies in this wast universe.
It sounds to me like these Life Coaches are nothing more than motivational speakers. Hey, I'm all for watching a business motivation video before my job in sales. But I am trying to find a secret MLM company, because the videos I see, all the Life Coaches talk about is how they used a Life Coach... to become a Life Coach, and they help others... be a Life Coach. If you're not actually helping someone do better in business or school, then that's a pyramid scheme.
I am a licensed social worker and have a life coach. She went through a long term certification, I think 2 years. She is very helpful with accountability and goal setting. It’s not therapy but it’s helpful. She is very transparent as to her role... I think we all need to be careful who we go to for whatever it may be.
Let's bump this comment to the top! Life coaches are valuable. If properly trained, they can be a reflection of our subconscious beliefs that we don't normally have access to. Plus, many coaches are trained in techniques such as NLP, hypnotherapy, EFT, etc. which are all extremely helpful for our wellbeing.
This video touches on some great points about the difference between life coaching and counseling. I wondered myself especially with the influx of tv shows and programs for a fee. Dr. Grande touched on what I feel to be the most significant point which is regulation. Without the techniques and practices being regulated someone could slap the label on anything and call it “help”. Counseling being a profession that requires school and training makes the two completely different.
Yesss! It’s down right dangerous. There is a life coach on RU-vid that specializes in adult children who grew up being narcissistically abused. She runs a 12 week program. She asks you to unlock your childhood trauma, along with another 100 to 200 members, and once you have achieved this you are pretty much screwed, open wounds and no one to help you deal with the infection of pain it creates. She keeps repeating if people don’t like what you say then it’s their problem, not yours, in this way she creates really self absorbed members who feel entitled to say what they want without taking accountability for their hurtful words. It really screwed with my head. I so wanted to belong that I went along with it all and was swept away by the cult like hype of this lady (who has threatened to sue members who speak out about her) I’ve reviewed her on google maps wand so have a few other brave ex members but she is incredibly narcissistic and denies and deflects. This year one of her members set themselves on fire and died, this has to stop! She charges $1000 to do her 12 week, then another $$$$ for master class then $$$ for her warrior membership sight per month, then $$$ cruises and she doesn’t stop. She gloats of her fabulous life and beautiful new kitchen on video while some of her members are not sure where their next meal will come from, or where their next beating will hit. She claims to teach you how to manifest these things like she has. How do we stop this? It’s criminal for sure.
@@irispect6565 thank you for your opinion, in my opinion you opinion is were informative and my opinions have evolved and changed due your opinion. Thanks
@@irispect6565 I have to disagree. I've watched many RU-vid videos from different people covering Narcissism, and I've found that Romano knows her stuff. She has definitely been abused and knows the behaviors and patterns of people with Narcissism higher on the spectrum. Many do not, and actually cause more damage. That being said, there are many licensed professionals that cause more damage because they themselves are not versed in the behavior patterns of Narcissism, nor are they even aware of the various types. When in school to become a psychologist, the only information on cluster B personality disorders comes from the criteria of the DSM-5, which is in dire need of being updated. It only describes the garden variety Narcissist, and only one type. To learn of the more nefarious types, the psychologist in school needs to be going for criminal psychology. That's why the majority of licensed psychologists are useless in helping victims and survivors of Narcissistic abuse. So, there is absolutely nothing wrong with someone calling themselves a coach that specializes in helping from Narcissistic abuse. And there's no reason a coach with experience, such as Romano has, can't be effective in that realm. I get that you feel like she rips people off and charges too much money , and that she's getting wealthy doing so. That also doesn't make her a charlatan. The gloating, or what appears to be Narcissistic when she shows off her new kitchen, etc, is something that many survivors do when we have schadenfreude towards our abusers ( Also natural) and we want them to see we are having a great life. Its actually quite normal, as having a great life post Narcissist is the best revenge. As a survior myself, I know what kind of brain fog you have to get through to be able to ascertain what happened to you and then be able to articulate in such a way that it makes sense. It's not easy. It's alot of work to get there emotionally. She's obviously done the work. And she SHOULD charge for her more personalized services. I give her credit that she has taken what was the darkness in her life ( abuse and abusive people ) and turned it into a way to sustain her life and to become successful with it. And really, why shound she spend years and be in financial debt for who know how long from laying tuition to a college where she wont even get the necessary curriculum to treat survivors of Narcissistic abuse anyway? Really, only those that have experienced the abuse can understand it, so getting a degree in this case is fruitless. Anyway, all of us surviors should be so lucky to make a career out of what our abuserstried to destroy us with. So, in my opinion, she is one of the most informed non psychologists on RU-vid that definitely knows what she is talking about and I listen to her, along with Dr. Ramani.
Couldn’t agree more. Boundaries and clarity are a real issue. I wonder if life coaches are able to reflect upon their own process and recognise when they are hooked into someone’s material when it mirrors their own.
I've used both. I found my life coach to be extremely helpful. I had basically no expectations, but they really helped me reach my goals. Part of what I like about a life coach is that they're not afraid to get into helping you make life decisions, something that a counselor won't do. I've also been to therapy and that's very helpful but in a totally different way.
If they’re really making decisions for you, you’re simply codependent upon them. As a vulnerable teenager I befriended a guy online that was a life coach, and all he did was live vicariously through me. At the time everything felt right, but I was simply taking too much risk and ignoring intuition. I let him possess me in a way, but I enjoyed the ride. I’m happy that you’ve found someone who helps you but don’t ever be afraid to question what they stand for. Know yourself and what you stand for or someone’s traumatized inner child may decide who you are for you.
@@dancegod1691 "ignoring intuition". The way you phrased this was very helpful to me! When I read that, I realized that this has been a huge part of my problem for a very long time. In wanting to give people the "benefit of the doubt" like I've been taught my whole life, I've often ignored my own intuition, which was trying to help me avoid bad situations, relationships, and a lot of pain. Thanks for commenting and sharing your views. This was helpful to me.
THAT is scary, because I bet you they aren't better than you in what they are coaching. You just needed a listening ear, but then you got someone that thinks they have the power to make life decisions for you. What an ego stroke for them!
I see many people are finding this alarming. I found it to be quite helpful. I used a life coach for a few weeks to help me stay motivated, and I landed my dream job, and then that was it, job done.
The problem wiith you saying your life coach helped you reach your goals is that its anecdotal, so even if your opinion of your life coach was accurate (another issue in itself since humans lie to themselves frequently) its probably not typical or valuable as an example
Dr. Grande, I have enjoyed your videos. You have a nice style that appears very grounded in science and research, which in my opinion a professional should always be. Your analysis of life coaching was excellent. Here is the issue I see with life coaches... they invariably seem at one time or another to cross the line over to "therapy or counseling" and into the realm of professional counselors or psychologists without that training or licensure. This in my opinion can be dangerous. Now, that is not to say that some of the things life coaches say or suggest does not necessarily parallel what we do as professional doctors, or even help people as you point out, however, being unregulated there seems a greater potential for harm. I especially like your take on developmental maturity. Our licensing boards, at least in my opinion, and i am being general here, need to take a stronger look at regulation simply because given the type and minimal number of hours needed to be a coach, there is always the danger of venturing into uncharted or untrained professional waters, if you take my meaning. Again, thank you for your videos, please keep doing them. My deepest respects sir.
Michael Smallwood I’ve read a lot of Carl Jung, and I think Peterson exploitsJung’s ideas and bends then to shape Peterson’s schist worldview. I’ve meaning to watch Dr. Todd’s video. Now there is a scholar who is making a difference!
I find is strange that you do not differentiate between counselling and coaching. Coaching is education and guidance, positive psychology if you will. Counselling assumes mental health challenges. Completely disparate topics. By the way there are plenty of highly qualified counsellors, psychologists and psychiatrists that are extremely poor at their job. Just as there is the potential for an outstanding life coach to have minimal formal qualifications. A piece of paper guarantees nothing.
Great video! Thanks Dr. Grande. It's the first video in which you show you're also having a great sense of humour. "Learning how to unharness my inner narcissist" for 1000 USA dollars an hour by someone who isn't a licensed counselor and did a 3 hour Life Couching training? No, thank you very much 😂😂😂 I rather prefer to listen for free to the videos of Dr. Grande in which we learn a lot we can use in our personal battles with mental health issues and in discovering the 'harness narcissists" we unfortunately have to deal with nowadays in this society so often. A Happy Christmas to everyone who is a big fan of this RU-vid channel 🎅🌲☃
Very biased perspective against life coaching. He hasn’t looked into this topic much and doesn’t give coaching a fair angle. He also puts too much stock in the maturity of counselors. There are fair points, but his main focus was really on marketing rather than describing what life coaching actually is and how it compares. Yes, there is not a consensus, but the International Coaching Federation does set the standards in the coaching industry nowadays, so I’m bewildered why he didn’t dig enough to come across them and reference that.
I’ve known two people who became life coaches. Two people I kept at arms length as they are dangerously fucked up individuals. Life coaches fit perfectly in the dietitian/nutritionalist confusion. I am relieved to see in the comments that a lot of people have sussed it out as mainly a scam. This doesn’t take away the fact that many do it with good intentions but the risks are too high for some people.
I watch a lot of your videos and what surprises most about this one is the lack of research and your obvious bias, which is not how to usually come across. Yes, there are a lot of unqualified and potentially dangerous people out there calling themselves life coaches based on little more than the fact they have a life. But there are also a lot of life coaches who are committed to attaining proper training, engage in continuous professional development and who ascribe to professional bodies with their codes of ethical conduct.
This is really informative, thank you dr :) And also the comments here. Sometimes it's worth to wait a day watching these videos, because I also get a lot of information from people's comments :)
Crappy Childhood Fairy on RU-vid is a "coach" with zero credentials (not even a certified life coach) claiming to heal Complex PTSD. She has almost 400K subscribers and so many online defenders despite it being a felony in her state to do what she's doing (a non-licensed person treating any kind of mental health, relationship, or emotional disorder). Tick tock.
@@kshithiyathish There are laws against it and in California, where she lives, what she's doing is a felony. She's under investigation by the California Department of Consumer Affairs currently. I spent an hour being interviewed by the investigator myself. Fingers crossed they have enough to enforce the law.
Hey Doc. I like the video. I think you did touch on some key points. I think there is some bias in your statement (understandably) but in any case I feel it is all based on what a person needs. There are people out there that do not need therapy as they are not going through any trauma or diagnosed for PTSD or drug or alcoholic abuse. At this point life coaches can be beneficial to help people who simply want to overcome obstacles and limiting beliefs in order to have a better overall quality of life. It’s not a “ rent a friend” service. If that were the case, every friend I’ve had would still be in my life which ain’t the case. And yes there are plenty of negative influences in people’s lives. How do I know? Being a trainer and former bouncer.
Thank you so much one more time, Dr Grande. I'd been thinking about that topic for some time. In the end, I agree with you 100% and I feel validated after watching one more of your incredibly helpful videos. I'm pretty much in the end of my recovery from narcissist abuse, I suppose, and like some people I would like to help other targets. I thought about taking a coaching course but gave up for the reasons you mentioned: I came to notice it might be full of opportunistic narcissists, which I can live without lol. After months of continuous research, and support from friends and other victims, I'm seriously considering doing that, specially after so many failed attempts to find a qualified professional in the area. The way I see it, with little to no empathy and knowledge, most of them retraumatize the targets in CPTSD. That's simply ridiculous and cruel. However, I know about my limitations,, i know I need to dedicate and study much more psychology and treatments. I really feel like helping, at least informing, people about it, but I'm aware I'm not gonna change the world, of course. Thank you so very much for all your videos. They're priceless and a lifesaver. I hope you never stop.❣😎🍀 Thank you one more time, Dr Grande.
Even the term "Life Coach" is narcissistic. What makes them a "Life Coach"? Do they know everything about life or most of it? In Japan, they have exactly the same thing but at least they are humble enough to call it by the right name: Rent a friend, rent a sister, rent a brother, rent a family, etc
Really agree with your opinion. The entry level really is too low. Though I think harnessing is not about power over others just power over your mind and yourself. A honest life coach would not take a client if they have to deal with mental illness if they are not educated treating it. A good life coach should focus on encouraging clients to focus on their dreams that connect with their soul and help them get closer to it with real life action plans. But as you mentioned, it’s vulnerable to scam. Therefore a potential client should not believe in high promise but in their own feelings about the coach. :)
Someone like yourself KNOWS what they are talking about. Yes education and going through all the hard hard work youve been through. I know your not just spewing whatever just to sound good, i really know already you are absolutely credible.
I think life coaching may be helpful for people who have immediate problems they want to solve or goals they want to set and they need that extra push or guidance from someone who can help them navigate through that process. Whereas I view the counseling process as dealing with deeper issues and gaining coping mechanisms. I also think as counselors we have to be careful in not being condescending towards other practices outside of our own so that we don't shame others or even potential clients they may want to participate in counseling and life coaching.
I think I would tend to agree with you on this point Elysha. There definitely is a place for both specializations. THe only concern is the chance of misrepresentation as to what that may entail for the client who assumes this is the same thing as counseling.
There are so many life coaches who do not have their life together who pursue clients. I worked with a business/life coach before I got a business coach through the SBA who was a former CEO. The first person tried to encourage me to not get an important procedure I need for my disability and to instead go to some scam doctor. I put a lot of research and work into finding good allopathic doctors to do the procedure I need. She wouldn't get off the call even though she knew it was painful to me to keep talking because of my brain problem and was trying to pressure me into paying her $2,000/mo lol no. I am Southern and was too polite. She was supposed to be free through a non profit. I should have reported her. I charge more than $2,000/mo for my clients now for an actual service backed by my degrees that brings them monetary results through my work (securing B2B contracts for them).
i've been looking into coaching because they seem more willing to disagree with you, tell you what you're doing is wrong and how to change it. the industry is ripe for scammers, but therapy has just been wildly ineffective, if i were a narcissist my experiences in therapy would have only made me worse because all they do is agree! how is it useful if they can't tell the client that what they're doing is fucked up? sure, i already knew, i knew before i even started, but the therapists' implicit agreement makes me think everything must be justified or else they'd SAY SOMETHING....right?
You can throw in Tony Robbins: Awaken the Inner Giant in you. Well Tony Robbins is a giant, he's 6'8" but that doesn't mean you can be as giant as he is!
The last part of your video about a mature LMHC developing over time has me thinking about law enforcement. I think this could/should apply to police officers. I think the law enforcement community receives a bad wrap and rightfully so. I don't think all law enforcement officers are bad but I also don't think it is "only a few bad apples." I think law enforcement in general has a primary culture of toxic masculinity, aggression, and narcissism. I think all law enforcement officers should attend the police academy for a minimum of two years. Half of the academy could be dedicated to training for the harsher aspects of police work (e.g. violent gang encounters, car chases, etc.) and the other half of academy training could be dedicated to social work skills for use in police matters related to helping a mentally ill unhoused person, school truancy, missing people, etc. If something does not change with law enforcement current way of operating, its bad reputation and inability to win over the trust of the communities that need it most will continue to degrade.
Life coaching is the Walmart of talk therapy. Be very careful what you share with these people. I got burned by a popular RU-vid life coach. Spent months and months talking to them and sharing my feelings and pretty much entire life story. This person turned out to be super weird and left me an angry voicemail when I missed an appointment. Literally told me to "go fuck myself" and said they are sick of my "Feeling sorry for myself bullshit". Don't mistake a clown for a professional. These people can be very dangerous to your mental health and more.
I have had better experiences with life coaches (Hendricks institute trained ) then any therapist (counselor). I have had professional therapist that were messed up and seemed far from having integrity. Somatic therapist I have had good experiences. With life coaching (Hendricks Institute) I have had sessions were I have transformation that would take months to years with talk/regular therapy. I understand there is a lot of styles and some maybe ridicules but I have seen professionals who I can label there. It’s important to know where they got training and then check out the ones they got there certified from. I never found a life coach a hired friend…they were more professional than some pro’s
There is a real distinction between coaching and counseling: A counselor works with the unhealthy part of a person and the coach works with the healthy part of the person, whenever I interview a new potential client, I asked them after they explained what they are trying to cope with, is this preventing you from functioning on a daily basis? If they say say, mostly yes, then I refer them to seek counseling, if they reply with, no, I can function, just wished that there was a better way to move forward, then have dive deeper into what kind of coaching they would benefit from. To say that executive coaching is the same as business coaching or life coaching is wrong on all levels. The fact that it's an unregulated sector gives it flexibility, and freedom of discovery. Often clients have commented on how much farther and deeper I was able to bring them to find their own solutions than any counseling that they took before. Many say that counseling actually prevented them to move forward, as they were tired of rehashing the same old each year. Regulatory body is important, however, it has to be an integrated system. Counseling, therapy & coaching & workshops have to work together with the client. Can't keep buying the client it's weekly fish, give him a rod to borrow, teach him or her to fish, clean it, cook it and experience living life again. In the last I was part of the pilot project of dual diagnosis as the life coach, nowadays its known as Concurrent Disorders. I have supported inmates to integrate into their community who were diagnosed with Concurrent Disorders, I have supported people with disabilities and Concurrent Disorders in my home as well as a day program provider. I have been part of Forensic Psychiatric team in the Forensic Psychiatric Hospital in BC. Because of my coaching training, I can work with all walks of life, however, just like a counselor, one must choose their niches and master them and keep learning, just because I know how to coach, doesn't mean I can stop learning how to coach better
Watching videos like your channel and other channels have really helped me sort out lots of issues in my life. I appreciate all you do Dr. G! Hope you have a great holiday!
I don't know if this comment will get in front of you, Dr Grande. But I have noticed a new individual on RU-vid that has been getting a substantial following, Wes Watson. He seems to be generating a lot of influence over his followers. I believe you might find him.... interesting. And I would love to hear your thoughts.
Hello, dr. Todd Grande! I am a fan of your channel for the past years. I want to ask you what do you feel about my next situation. I studdied foreign languages, I have a bachelor's in that and this year I applied for one course that gives me permission to teach English, but in the recent years, I made up my mind and wanted to apply for art school, because being an art teacher is my dream job. I am a self-taught artist myself and art is what personally helped me heal and I would love to help people do the same. Meanwhile, I found out that there are accredited courses online that can teach you how to be an art coach and help people heal through art( not as an art therapist though). My actual question is this one: If I will become an accredited art teacher and I would want to coach people on how to heal through art, would it be professionally accepted, or it would sound like a scam? I want to deliver quality and if this is unacceptable, I don't want to sound like an entitled narc coach. What advice would you give to me? Thank you for your time! Your content is sensational, as always.
Half these guys don’t even live by what they preach I just do it for free cause I love helping people I run landscaping company full time you should never do this for money people who do it for that just copy other life coaches ideas I do it because I been through so much hurt and I got through and helping people through what I went through and watching them get better is so rewarding to me
I think it's a great service. People are weak and lazy, the have a desire to buy things, the life coach is the thing. They don't want to do the work they just need a baby sitter to tell them how to live. It makes them feel good giving their money away. Maybe they don't have a church to give it to?
Mental health and life coaching are unrelated. A good life coach helps people develop and understand systems they can implement. As well, they simply guide the client to a point they can work on themselves in their chosen niche. Trying to be a therapist counselrr etc. Makes no sense for a life coach.
oh my gosh this is so great, especially about the ambiguous buzz words. please please do a video on self help books! the most popular ones say that “the universe will provide all your needs” and weird stuff like that that just confuses people and make them feel like failures for not being able to live up to all the promises those books make. causing more problems that didn’t previously exist for the reader. so damaging but the industry keeps growing and growing and unqualified people keep making best seller lists and misleading people.
Great topic!!! theres alot of people out there that im sure have no idea what their doing and act like they do and scam and can also mentally hurt other vulnerable people.
Life coaches are often Cluster B disordered individuals who were abused as a child and genuinely want to help others overcome their pain. However, through life coaching they acquire innocent fuel from damaged people who need therapy through their word salad manipulation especially through social media. It should be regulated once you charge for services.
I notice that too. maybe they focus on helping others because they don't want to look at themselves and they get adoration and supply from their clients.
Depending on intentions. Power of intention can be applied by all people. People in the most so called qualified stations can and will direct interpretations in the way that best suite them. That is because, just like Lego Blocks, things can be built around. A Life Coach or a Counselor, or what Not. Are people that have lived a life of experiences. Rather Formal, or informal. That will take the time to talk with you and give their best input. Only You are the best judge of what you need to do in life. Science always changes. People need to learn to own themselves.
Hi Dr, great video I think you are very right and i wanted to say that some coaches take the easy path and that is, in some way, your country's fault. I Don't want to be rude, but the american fast, cheap and easy life y expanding and all you see in other countries is fast food, fast service without being regulated like coaching, etc. It Is just an opinion don't take it personal.
It sucks because I want to be a life coach so much, I have a crisis line certificate, volunteer hours and a Psychology Diploma, but I do not have the confidence therefore probably should not be a life coach, Listening and caring is all that I am good at.
Listening and caring is a great start, thats better than most! Become a recognised and registered mental health clinician and you can travel the world. Confidence will come from fulfilling goals that can take you places and a profession that is rewarding where you learn proper therapeutic techniques that can help others and dont make things worse for them , which can happen if you dont have proper training and registration :).
