Is Your Child Strong-Willed or Weak-Willed? 

We’ll dive into more on this topic in some upcoming episodes, but for now I would encourage you to start small. So keep the lesson short and require full attention and best effort. So if the lesson is a copywork lesson, she has a choice: she can give it her best for 2 minutes and be done, or she can dawdle and be sloppy and then have to do it over again when she would rather be doing something else. If you can make the effort of will very small at the beginning, it’s easier to “step over the bar,” as it were. And the more often you step over that bar, the easier it gets. Then you can raise it a teeny bit, little by little. Do the same thing for yourself. Choose one area in which you want to strengthen your will. Then think of a relatively easy choice you can make in that area every day. Perhaps the area is making your bed. Set the goal “bar” low to begin with. Your beginning goal might be to pull up the sheet. That’s it. It will take you less than a minute. Now if you want to do more while you’re at it, you can; but you don’t have to. In the beginning stages, you simply want to pull up the sheet every day sometime before bedtime. (And if you pull it up before you pull it back down to climb in, that counts!) Just get used to making that decision every day to pull up the sheet. When that gets easy-peasy, you can raise the bar a teeny bit, but don’t raise it too far. Try to set yourself up for success: a small choice of will every day. Small, constant touches add up.

@@SimplyCharlotteMason What would be a good definition for strong will.

@@gonzalez6073 Here's an article that defines what we mean by a strong will in a positive sense: simplycharlottemason.com/blog/the-way-of-the-will/

This is really helpful, thank you. I find that I have a strong will in some areas of life but not in others

My oldest is 11. It does it harder for sure! But its never too late. Don't give up! I'm sure you can find something to encourage their will. I'm my house its video games 😂

We'll have more episodes on the topic of the will in the future. In the meantime, check out this free e-book on the will. It should give you some encouragement and ideas. simplycharlottemason.com/store/the-way-of-the-will/

Always think about what message you are sending by giving in. Make your expectations clear before the child is allowed to make the choice (in your example, inform the child at the beginning of the meal that to get dessert he must eat everything on his plate) and then hold to what you said. If you give in, the child will form a habit of fussing until you give in.

Hi, Thank you for reaching out with your question! In a Charlotte Mason approach to education we believe in habit training. Our children will experience many things in their life as children and later as adults that they do not like, however helping them to form good habits early on will help them in so many ways. We want them to have the habit to do what they should when they don't feel like it so they can fulfill God's purpose for their lives. Here is another post on the will that helps to shed some light on this topic. simplycharlottemason.com/blog/i-am-i-can-i-ought-i-wish-i-did/

Hi, This is an excellent question! Simply put, a will that is strong is able to choose what is best/right even when that choice is hard and it is not what you want to do or feel like doing. You can read more about that idea here: simplycharlottemason.com/blog/will-core-values-of-charlotte-mason/

As parents we have a responsibility to make sure that we are using our God given authority to raise our children to have good habits that will bring glory and honor to Him. Authority can be misused and we do need to make sure that we are using it appropriately to help our children to learn and grow into the people God created them to be. Here is a link that helps to make that distinction. We would not advocate for having a child who blindly obeys everything that they are told, we do also respect our children as people and want them to be able to think for themselves and make good choices as they continue to learn and grow. Here are a few posts with some more information on this topic. simplycharlottemason.com/blog/authority-and-obedience-core-values-of-charlotte-mason/ simplycharlottemason.com/blog/the-fence-of-authority/

Hi, Thank you for reaching to share your thoughts on this topic. Respect for the child as a person is a core value of the Charlotte Mason approach to education. Yes, we have been placed in authority over our children and we are there to help them build and strengthen their wills so that they can do all that God has called them to do, however we must also treat all people with respect. Here is a link where you can read more about this core value if you are interested. simplycharlottemason.com/blog/respect-core-values-of-charlotte-mason/