Jane Doe - In some sense, weakness is a VIRTUE. If he were weak enough when he was just about to HURT an animal, then the animal would live. In some sense, STRENGTH is in the service of cruelty and death. And, WEAKNESS is in service of compassion and life. Kindness should be handled as a UNIVERSAL phenomenon, not a speciesist one. Kindness to people means nothing if on the other hand you kill animals - just because you feel like it... Apostle Paul in the Corinthians says something very meaningful: "I delight, then in WEAKNESS... for when I am weak, then I am STRONG." *Since what I said above is widely misunderstood I elaborated on it more in my comments below.*
It has a lot of to do with how you feel, think and act if you are a trully strong person only really stupid people will not understand. Strength is something psychological beyond physical ability.
@@magma3525 strength and cruelty are not derived from each other .. Weakness And kindness are not derived from each other.. The opposite I think.. Really strong people don't hurt others.. Weak people can be the cruelest when in position of power
AL Capone said it, and i quote “Don't mistake my kindness for weakness. I am kind to everyone, but when someone is unkind to me, weak is not what you are going to remember about me.” -Al Capone
When beliving in Jesus Christ he will create a new heart in you and you will be a new being, wantint to do good and to be nice to others, because you then realize that we all are images of God just like you.
"If you have been brutally broken but still have the courage to be gentle to other living beings then you're a badass with the heart of an angel" - Keanu Reeves
The gist of that is what I've always been telling myself. I've gone through an seriously extraordinary suffering, but I've always told myself that I won't let it turn me into a person that inflicts suffering on other people or someone that doesn't try to help alleviate other peoples suffering.
Agreed 100% even if you are wronged by someone it makes no sense to hurt this person. Just move on they will learn one way or another and it shouldnt be from you.
Brother Biz, another tactic is to call people out on their poor treatment of others, its tricky because its never helpful to fight fire with fire and treat shitty people badly, i have found that causes a downward spiral.
@@KaifamGamingyou think being kind is the same as being people pleaser? I personally think being kind requires gaining strength to draw the line between both concepts
Don't let the bad apples spoil your inner beauty, my friends. It's not worth it to adopt their ways because it doesn't make life easier. To the contrary, it's far more miserable to be like them. Persevere.
Speaking of shit apples, which you were.. "When a shit apple falls from a tree and grows up in a field of shit, it doesn't have a choice. ... She's gonna be a shit apple tree just like her father ... - Jim Lahey
The best compliments I get are when strangers tell me how polite, helpful, and considerate my kids are. I may have failed at some things, but at least I’m putting some decent humans on the planet!
Same here, I have not always made the best choices in life, but kindness, consideration for others and manners cost nothing, and I'm lucky that my family all have these qualities and I'm so proud that my sons are too, that and a sense of humour. None of us takes ourselves too seriously 😃
I was taking a walk the other day, and there was this little 3 years old kid walking beside his mother, he gave me a thumbs up while looking at me dead in the eyes showing no emotion, I thought it was so funny, it made my day a little better and still makes me laugh when I remember it.
It’s not that everyone wants to make your life hell, it’s that everyone’s so wrapped up in their own pathetic worlds that the wants and needs of others are usually just totally ignored.
I think niceness comes from having a thick skin. If you know you can withstand the negative, you can afford to be positive. Negative people often don't think they can get by on their own merit, so they resort to nefarious covert strategies to get ahead.
This guy gets it. It takes a certain amount of boldness to be kind, because you might not receive it in return and that's going to be more painful than just getting shit when you _didn't_ put yourself out there. You have to be a bit devil-may-care to be openly positive.
@Billy Bob Thats where a distinction needs to be made between just being nice and being nice for your own advantage. When it comes to the whole "nice guys" thing, the only ones who actually get upset about women turning their niceness down are the ones who were being nice and expecting to receive something in return. Being nice for the sake of being nice is a good thing but being nice for your own advantage is just as bad as it is good
for example if I give money to charity because I want to help homeless people, thats a very kind thing for me to do. But if I give money to a charity so that I can improve my own image and look like a good person, sure it might help the homeless people in the exact same way but thats no longer being kind, youre doing it for yourself
Kindness is contagious. Sadly so is rudeness. When someone doesn’t say hi back or speaks rudely it is so important to try to continue to stay positive and be kind to people
Im glad you said this people used to call me nice and say I was sweet all the time and I used to be the person who smiled at everyone and spoke to everyone in passing. These past few years so many people look down on me and react negatively when I do it that I stopped as to not be embarrassed by it anymore and people stopped calling me kind.
@@stargazingloner4449 Fuck those people man, keep being a good human, they are so rare in this day and age!!! Much love for you for being a good dude (You have a heart of gold. Don't let them take it from you.- Demon Souls)
This stems from good parenting and I truly believe it’s a learned behavior. If the child sees the parent being kind to others it becomes second nature and deep rooted.
One of the reasons I'm so kind is because of the pain my family has caused me. My mom is a kind person for sure, but I also learned it through my friends and by myself, I really dont want others to feel like I did
It really is because I had issues and stuff but my kind heart prevailed because I would remember my loving family and the stuff my parents taught me about hurting feelings and emotions and it is OKAY to be sad for each other and want each other to be happy. America made it into a weakness. It's not.
I think the best thing joe rogan has ever said for me is “immediately I was... angry... then part of me said ‘that poor bastard,’ and I went with that poor bastard.” He took a negative immediate response and provided a counter thought and went with the more positive thought for Joe. For the more negative among us im positive we can learn from that prime example honestly.
yeah that sat with me. i follow this method every day and it ends up so much better, for all parties. continue to spread the love, especially for those who need it.
“If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man's life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.” ― Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Letting go of anger and putting yourself in their perspective. I usually let these people act out their anger and have no reaction. It's weird some people just don't think then feel bad after I let them act out the anger. I think about my own self image. I don't want to be an angry unintelligent person that acts without thinking. I should feel bad for them because they let anger and emotion control life. If you can overcome your own self and let go of Ego. We can all find a better way. Judgement separates realization that we are all the same as human beings brings togetherness.
These guys really nailed it. If you are kind you feel good. If you are bad you feel bad. That is intrinsic. It’s for a reason. To help the village survive. Bad emotions will eventually make a person sick, and alienate them from everyone. And enough people helping each other will only produce more good things. Good podcast man.
True kindness is when you give or do something for someone, and don't expect anything back. True kindness is purely doing for someone else with no expectations of personal gain of any kind on your part.
As far as shame and guilt goes, I've found that thinking about the past is only helpful if we're learning a lesson. If we're not, we need to move on and just do better.
I've found that this works in the opposite direction. If you find yourself constantly thinking about the past, it means that there is a lesson to be learned from that memory that you haven't yet integrated.
They really should teach basic psychology in grade school. I'm talking about kindness and adaptive ways to deal with difficulties, motivation techniques, and so on.
I recently got rid of some bad depression with Stoicism. It’s a great system for looking at life and learning what is worth worrying about and what isn’t. It’s great for motivation and self-discipline, too. Everyone should be taught Stoicism.
Like morgan freeman said "You wanna know how to change the world, one act of random kindness" being kind and people acknowledging it is such a nice feeling and can make your day better
Seriously I hate how true that is. Kind people get treated like crap and often abused in the work place. You have different rules when you’re a nice person than your rude ass coworkers
Good manners are a useful tool. I It's true they are not to be conflated with kindness, but you can't be truly kind without them (almost everyone has some kind moments). Note good manners and good etiquette aren't exactly the same thing. "The Devil is a Gentleman."
I like how Joe really observed how terrible he felt, was insanely honest with himself and us, and was able to articulate it. Unlike people to go to therapy and know $20 words but haven’t felt or lived their shiny new vocabulary . You can tell Joe understands a lot more than he can over-articulate
There's a saying "talk softly, but walk with a big stick". If you're a kind person, you absolutely need to be dangerous in order to dissuade the masses from taking advantage of you. You also must be mentally able to shut it off at any moment when challenged by someone who perceives your kindness as a weakness. I've also noticed that... Mean, arrogant, and rude people are often perceived by the masses as being of higher status. In the USA, perception of status is what's valued most, and people learn to appear to be high status (rather than putting in the work to actually be high status). I've noticed that most successful people are usually nicer, friendlier, more pleasant to be around, and more helpful. Unfortunately, truly successful people in life are only about 5% of the population. So that means you are constantly surrounded by the self-entitled, arrogance of the failing masses. All in all, being kind is something very difficult to maintain in the USA. You'll take a lot of damage and disrespect in the process, and it's hard to keep from internalizing that and becoming heart-hardened by injuries inflicted on you by mean spirited people looking to build their confidence by trying to diminish yours.
I honestly think it's the opposite. It's usually the ones struggling in life that are more humble and understanding, the successful ones are usually extremely full of themselves and aren't very kind or respectful. But obviously every group has it's good and bad
@@forman208 it drastically depends on if they worked for it or not, dwayne johnson or joe Rogan seem pretty nice because they worked for their success. But someone that inherited money or got lucky wont have that humbling experience of working hard
I work as a cashier. Many families with children come through my lane. I greatly appreciate when the kids have good manners. And I always applaud the parents for it.
Im 22 and work in a corprate office. I say hello to everyone as i try to friendly and spark conversation on passing by in the hallways. There is always at least one or two people with that blank face as if they just seen a ghost!! I agree kindess is what we need. You are awesome Joe love the podcast!!!
thats like 32k a year not bad at all for a 22 year old i see college grads working at target and lowes for $10/hr they got a useless degree and now aint worth shit
The Dark Knight Ape Man do not believe the God Lie Evolution forged me in the crucible of savagery I am a Nice Savage ...Nice to the nice ...Vicious to the Evil P.S. Nice avatar you have Jordan Peterson works 10 minutes from where I live in Toronto If I run into him on the street, Do you want me to give him a kiss for you ?
My parents never really pushed me to say thank you, holding doors for strangers, to help out & what not but I am so glad I picked it up on my own, you never know what someone’s going through
I've gotten so much cruelty, nastiness, and manipulation for simply being kind and empathetic to others. It's a tough life to be kind. There are days where I just want to throw in the towel and snap at people, but it's not a choice for me. I simply cannot treat people cruelly. I just can't do it.
Same here, I feel the negativity growing inside me.. it’s a fine balance between being kind to people and standing up for yourself when you are being taken advantage of.. Stay well bro 🙏🏼
What the guest was saying about teaching your kids manners is SO important!!! Holding doors, greeting people, helping with bags, little things that are crucial for, just, maintaining civility. Simply being NICE, in general, is absolutely central to my own personal well being.
2:24 when you talk about the guy in the hallway i find funny. I'm from the UK. When I visited America for vacation, whenever i was in a elevator or in a close quarters environment, everyone says 'Hello' and smiles. Here in the UK, if you do that, you're a really weird person. Really remarkable how cultures differ on the most minor scale.
AndroidDev I actually live in the Cotswolds. I’m surprised you say that, I find if you’re not really well known in the local community people just judge you and don’t want to talk to you ever.
My grandmother would always say that kindness is taught and learned at home. I saw my grandmother and parents be kind and lend a helping hand without any expectations..you never know what the other person is going thru.
I learned how to be kind through hippies! i know they get a lot of hate for god know what reason..but they are legit the nicest, selfless people ive hung out with, they all helped each other out and well thats where i learned the behaviour and i gotta admit it does feel really good to be of service to others!
The reason why I love Joe Rogan as a person is because of how real he is and he also seems to be always striving for good. Joe isn’t even part of any religion, yet he is such a good hearted person. I have tremendous amount of respect for Joe.
Yea Ok because people say that religion makes you a “better” person. Just because they are considered God’s people, they think that they have more morals than non religious people.
1)- Being humble and kind is important. 2)- The unevolved majority of people do not know the importance of reciprocity in kindness, trust me I lived in NYC and I saw how people would literally give not a fuck for a starving homeless young girl or how under more severe life threatening situations. It made me sad and also confused like "So this is the reality of human nature this is how MOST people are". 3)- I think it's fair to be selectively kind. That is fair to me. You pick and choose who is worth being nice to based on reciprocity and how they are to you, not just being kind or even considerate to everyone because being that way among a sea of assholes will make you a sucker they dont look out for you.
I was raised to be polite and have manners and all that. We would wave and say hello to strangers..then I moved to more populated areas and cities...lol they would look at me like I was crazy for saying hello to a stranger.
Being kind is a choice. One of my favorite quotes that is something I honestly try to live by is 'What good I may do, let me do it now, for I may not pass this way again'. I also think it's important to know that when you are being kind, you shouldn't expect anything in return, even acknowledgment of your kind act. Being kind to someone else is actually a gift for yourself and it feeds your character.
I taught myself to be kind, instead of nice. Being polite is impressive and refreshing. Treating people like people is just as affective as feeding them grapes. It’s about respect. I used to be rude or manipulative to people and I chose to be that way because I was bullied but I’m so glad I decided that I have control over my life.
Office workers: secretly hate each other but have to be friendly to each other because of hr Trades workers: constantly shit talking each other but actually great friends
I'm an American living in SE Asia. Ppl don't say hello here, ppl don't open doors for each other, ppl will enter the elevator as you're exiting. it used to piss me off but now I have realized it's just cultural.
67tomcat true. I mean you basically are around strangers (forced) . nothing in common for the most part. Throw in the differences of people's personalities. Shiiit. Even when I do look.or smile sometimes ppl still have that look. Iam very intuitive and perceptive so if I.see an annoyed or fake expression/smile I can't help but me annoyed by it to.
The world can be a sick place when you are unconditionally kind. It will make you unkind and hate yourself. Be kind to the right people who deserve it.
I say be kind, don’t be a pushover. That’s it, if you can tell the difference I believe you are solid. I am kind to as many people as possible without forgetting I should never expect anything in return.
Just be good to people in general, even if you don't know them. You dont have to let them take advantage of you. If you try to judge people in everyday interactions to see if they deserve your kindness, i feel like that can make you not only overly judgemental, but insecure and egotistical.
I always tell my daughter, no matter how bad the interaction you might have with someone, you never know what they’re going through. Sure, it doesn’t justify their behavior but, a smile and some kindness can make all of the difference
I used to work in movie theatre. An elderly was next in line and i took his order. After he paid me, he said I provided good service and he appreciated that. He then saif he would but he didn't have cash, so he asked me if he can shake my hand (2 years before the pandemic). I had never received such kindness from a stranger ever in my life. I was so glad to shake this guy's hand because to me it was sign of mutual respect. I was already smiling, but for the rest my shift, i was in total bliss haha. Nothing could ruin my day!
It feels good when you acknowledge and validate someone's existence. Especially when it comes back. Like tuning forks we can amplify loving vibrations. We are pure Love. Some just don't know it.
I feel kindness is something the majority of our society considers weak and pointless, it’s about crushing and defeating your fellow man down instead of helping one another out. People I feel are either getting more robotic in that they don’t feel or care about anyone or anything or they feel bitterness and hate moreover anything even resembling compassion and joy...really bums me out
I left California in 91 for this very reason. That feeling of isolation when strangers don’t exchange ANY words of kindness. I lived in the same apartment for 10 years and didn’t know any of my neighbors. I had customers who moved here from Pennsylvania and were shocked at the level of conversation and I told them “get used to it honey. People are going to talk to you like they’ve known you forever.”
Always be polite and well mannered. But never forget this world is every man for themselves. If you let them, even the nicest person in the world will take advantage of you. Look after yourself first.
Speechless Lasmr - lol false my man. What is the greatest rap album all time in your opinion my good sir? Illmatic is definitely top 5 all time if not #1. It’s hard to say that is an opinion statement my dude. If you really know your hip hop.
Daniel Lawler Ik it’s not true because I don’t try to take advantage of others. U guys just clearly haven’t met a genuinely nice person in ur entire lifes
I was a modern dude seeking to “be free” and “go with the flow”, with no clear moral code. I did my best to be kind to others, but looking back, I was lost, I hurt others, and I just ended up getting hurt. The only thing that helped me was to get back to my roots. I am Jewish and became very observant. I am now happy and am living a life I am proud of. So, I like to think that I’m an example of how religion can be good. I resisted it for so long. It’s good to be home. If you feel the urge to explore a religion (preferably that of your ancestors), I encourage you to do it and reap the happiness and peace of mind that will come. Good luck and blessings, everyone.
Waterman i always wondered why some people are so submerged in religion and I started to notice it was because it gives clarity or peace to them and your example is one of that
I've been crushed from being too kind to the point where I could no longer look someone in the eyes.. It's a hard world man.. But you gotta learn from those mistake and understand.. who is worthy of your kindness and with who you need to be cold as a rock ..
I think the problem is the road of kindness isn't a very self-sustaining one if you're around people who don't reciprocate that kindness and even if they do then the interaction feels weird over time... the mere fact that you have to be guilt-driven to act like this in religion kind of highlights the nature of being kind in general.
You are spot on, Joe!!! Thank you so much for speaking about this. You're amazing. When I was a freshman in college, I was walking to class and in passing, said hi to a guy on the school soccer team and he laughed in my face. I'll never forget how awful that made me feel; especially since at the time I was just a shy small town girl. These days (and over a decade later) the big city Jowita would've probably audibly disclaimed, "well aren't you just a peach?!", as I sashayed by him.. --Point being..-- that a-hole from college had TWO choices 1. Be a total douche or 2. Be kind. Ever since that moment I told myself I'd never be like him because I'd never want anyone to feel the way I did. ✌️❤️
You are pretty. When you said hi to him, he probably was going through a lot of shit, fucked up a bunch of things, had a real low self esteem. He probably did not believe he was worthy of being said hi to by a real pretty girl, he thought you were fucking with him. I know this because I've done it and I've seen everyone else doing it at some point.
True, The state of society is very sad right now it's unbelievable how hateful a lot of people are and with 0 empathy of how they impact other people. I do my best to be polite and respectful but I've had times when I've held the door for a lady or picked up something they dropped and they just stare at me with a blank or confused look and don't say anything..
Yes. This lady at a store knocked over a large stack of items. I helped her pick them up, and I was doing so, she walks away from all of the mess she had made. Makes a person not want to help anyone ever again.
My high school choir teacher taught all of his students how to be decent humans. He has an energy that is just contagious and if you weren’t a nice person you definitely turned into a nice person in his classroom.
I think that sometimes when strangers are nice we respond coldly because you don't trust why they are being nice. We grow up learning about manipulators untrustworthy people that turn on you tell others your secrets make fun of you . So theres this feeling of wanting to protect yourself and it makes you cynical.
I was walking out of goodwill and there was this elderly couple trying to figure out how to get a sprite out of this robot drink machine, I came up and bought their sprite and talked with them on the way out. It was a beautiful moment. Ive always been too nice and smiley no matter what, but yes also self loathing to the max, doing nice things and staying true to myself, and honest is the key for me.
I love Joe's advice on being kind to others. He needs to tell his advice to the females of today that are Killing each other by using snarky, childish, bitchy, and diva-like tactics especially other female celebrities. There's nothing wrong with being kind and Don't take it as weakness.
"Have You Filled A Bucket Today" Written by Carol McCloud is a children's book, and is basically the simplest/best way to explain how to be kind, what it means, and the importance of kindness. I recommend this book for anyone who has young kids, its honestly the best, my two girls love to read it
I love this conversation. My neighbor is a single mom with two young kids. I work a stressful job in law enforcement and I covet a day off. Seeing their yard completely neglected, I asked her if I could mow their lawn. She said yes, and I went at full force to make it the best I could until it was dark out. My reward: the kids saying “Thank you Charlie Brown!” Being kind takes strength, knowing when to be firm and polite is to be wise. Be weary of the one who remains calm during chaos, for they have the biggest hearts and carry a heavy sword.
Some people from big cities typically have this problem. It's a dog-eat-dog world to them. They had to be tough all their lives to live and survive. They learned if you're "too nice" people will step all over you. So when they see people that are too nice, they think "something is wrong with them"! I was actually told that by a couple of strangers I met from Baltimore when I spoke to them, believe it or not. Sad, really.
I can attest to this. I’m from Houston. Went to Denver and I thought people were too nice. I mean so nice that it felt as if everyone murdered someone and no one talks about it. I kinda don’t understand the “too nice” part. There’s too many weird people too. That’s y. Never speak to strangers and if someone is just hanging out outside probably up to no good because everyone has something to do in Houston
God, that's terrible. I've been told that I'm kind or a nice person, but when someone says I'm too nice, I'm not gonna care what that person thinks, I would take that as a compliment so you should do the same thing, too. Being a dick or being a bitch Actually makes people feel like they're doormats, not nice people.
They're right that being kind makes you feel good..but the main reason you should do it is because it makes OTHERS feel good and because it's the right thing to do
İ was waiting at a bus stop and saw a young homeless girl from afar asking for any sort of help . İt was raining so heavily and İ didn't come with any money at the time so İ went back home and bought food for her . İ came back to where she was at and gave her the food with some little money . Two days later , I was sitting at a barber shop waiting for a haircut and a stranger paid for my money and left without telling me . After my hair was done , the hairdresser refused to accept the money İ wanted to pay and said it has already being paid by the person who was before me . So İ was like this might be a reciprocate of the good deed İ did for the young girl. (Do good for others. It will come back in unexpected ways.)
I know this is an old podcast, but I am just seeing it . It is so important to be kind , I always tell my kids when they are leaving the house (when they were living at home ) “ Make it a great day, make good choices, be kind, I love you “ and when going to anyone else’s house “mind your manners” . 😊 I believe it worked and stuck with them . Have a beautiful productive day!!
