Jordan Peterson: How to Deal with Fatherlessness and Bad Fathers 

True that!

Totally agree!

……Yes!🥲

Hear hear

Yup!

Love this comment.

Yes and this truth is not a bad thing. I am so grateful me and my partner understand this. We have 3 kiddos. We still make time for us but it really is about raising good people

@@lizab8400 amen. I was married for 14 years, once we had kids my wife got depressed and my attention wasn’t satisfying her dosage needed and so now she’s a single mom and I never really see my kids anymore.

4:13I told my daughter this a few years ago... I’m so glad she listened

This is truth. I have learned this the hard way and am trying to be the best father I can be

I love this! Great for you!! ❤️🧡

Rely less on personality. It's not productive nor healthy to look upon a public figure as your "father". Embrace the teachings you find useful and live by them, as you are. However, beware of the power of personality.

Aww🥺❤️👏🏽 youre amazing! You gooo

Lol jesus

@Aganemnon567 all your gods are human, cope harder

Big up

Good luck getting this idea across in a society that believes women can do no wrong

@@MsDragonbal776 it starts with one. I make sure that I do not glorify the time a spent as a single mother. I made mistakes that lead to my child having to suffer. I was young and I was irresponsible. I worked hard to change though and grown I now am married to an amazing man. He works his but off and I stay home and raise our children. I share my experience and try to let others know especially young women that they do not want to take the path I chose. There is nothing worse then listening to your young child cry because they don’t have a father and they think they are at fault. I can’t change the world however I can be truthful about my lived experience and hope that helps others especially our youth make different decisions.

@@RabenKaiser thank you!

@UC4z_tJyBeozHxFfJlwh2U5Q no a single parent is NOT enough. No matter how good or capable you are, having another person who is just as capable as you will produce far better results. To really try to get my point across, what I'm trying to say is that, no matter how good you think your mom was at raising you, do you really not think you would be far more capable and succesfull as an individual if you had two loving parents giving you twice as much of everything that you could from one?

i aint know i had a brother cuz u talmbout my dad right now LOL jokes aside growing up without a father can be used as a way to challenge yourself into growing even faster. I'm a lot more mature than my peers and now get confused when I see people my age or even older struggle with issues that I find to be no brainers. Personally I matured and grew through depending on myself, never making any excuses and always being goal oriented. Once my physique and character peaked I found myself in a relationship with an amazing woman who I'd say just a year before would've been a millenia out of my league. I knew she was the one too as I found her at my most narcissistic state believing that everyone was below me, that I was the gift. In a sense it's good to have some of this confidence as opposed to just laying around feeling sorry for yourself blaming everything on others but man being with her helped me truly love myself, realize some of the demons that my father has left within me and continue bettering myself as a person Good luck man. You won't always believe in you but when that time comes believe that there's someone that believes in you

Continue to love your father for he is the only one you have. He loves you.

Jim Cole fool

@@immaletyoufinish Why would you say that?

@@jimcole6423 ignore him mate. A typical fatherless guy that growing up only by age and still has no clue about manhood, It seems there are only two product from fatherless family, it either a man who became hostile to himself aka depressed or a man who became hostile outside by bragging about academic and materialistic success to feel more superior and stomp down other people.

Well this is a bit tragic😅 you can be a decent or even good person even without a dad

@@gaia7240 You can, but depression, high anxiety, teenage pregnancies, lack of self-worth, less capacity to solve problems or less empathy, are just some of the consequences of fatherlessness. I turned out to be pretty ok but needed decades to fully heal, be able to have healthy relationship or live without anxiety and lack of confidence.

@@janahcoaching yes I don't deny that, but it could also be the environment's fault in which you grew up

@@gaia7240 Do you know the facts, figures and statistics on fatherless children? I do, that's what I work with daily. Maybe you could find out interesting stuff if you learned something about it.

@@janahcoaching I admit I do not know the statistic, but I was talking from personal experience, sure it scar you not having a father but you still know what wrong and what is right, some people just choose to behave bad

I understand you We are in the same boat

I feel you Man Dealing with the same thing right now Hope everything gets better for you and your mom

😭😭 I'm sorry about that. My dad just had no backbone and did not live as an example for me and my family. My mom didn't help either. They both have issues. I'm 26 and I'm trying to figure out how I'm supposed to respond now

Fight him. Overpower him. He’ll turn to a little bitch real quick. The only way to take down a tyrant is to be more powerful.

@@sidharthramgoolam2556 me too

You are fortunate , Shaun. Many of us wish we could be so lucky.

You are blessed.

My dad is manic depressive, but we figured it out. I just stay out of his way when he has an episode (which happens sporadically) and even then it’s almost never too bad. He’s a good guy. And now that I’m an adult and I can understand it, I feel very fortunate that he didn’t spoil me. He is very successful and rich, but he never bought me anything or gave me money, but boy did he spend time with me. It motivated me to be active and to find my own success in life. He promised me a car for my 18th birthday when I was little, which he gave me - a Mercedes Coupé, it was his only gift to me, but it turned out to be another motivator because I had to start working even harder. That thing costs a lot of money to maintain. As a child I hated him for not “sharing his riches” with me, but now I see it was excellent parenting on his part. I hate some of my friends for being spoiled and dependent on their parents even in their adult life. The worst part is they think that it’s OK.

@@dereksalas8195 wrong. the blessed are those born with difficulties, who can then learn from them and become stronger. pray for strength and not an easy life

Interesting place to post a comment like that.

As an adult, you have choices that you didn't have as a child. Love yourself first. ✌️☮️

Were you particularly close to your mother?

@@CarlosRodriguez-bh2ey we get along. I don’t tell her everything but she’s supportive towards me

Same now i have abusive sibilings

Mine too, my dad just love the feeling of being dominant. He didn’t hesitate to use violent in order to get his way, even the most unreasonable one. My mom is the same but she prefer verbal abuse since she cannot use force that often. To your question :”what kind of parent wants to break their child?”. From my personal experience, I can tell you that some parents just don’t love their child as much as they love their ego. If the child in anyway hurt their big ego such as talk back to them, don’t make them proud, disagree with them, they would alienate the child and subject the child to possible way (no matter how cruel) to feed their ego.

My old psychologist used to say that the next best thing to a decent father is strong and capable friends. If you make friends with really top performing men and spend lots of time with them. You will be much better off, especially if you lack accountability and confidence. You are a product of your environment. I didn't have the best Dad. So I found other men to fill the role. And it has worked.

Fuck my father.

My father mean nothing to me.

This whole conversation is the typical TradCon *intellectual dishonesty* It's not _fatherlessness_ "problem" It's *SINGLE MOTHERHOOD* , they are using "fatherlessness" as a *euphemism* for it to subtly shift the blame onto *MEN* Blaming *MEN* yet again. To the uninitiated and low IQ it seems indistinguishable, but it's a _semantic_ game they're playing, as to not upset the _female_ base. You don't get to blame men for poor ♀ *CHOICES AND BEHAVIOR.* This intellectual dishonesty is why the traditional conservatives will _keep losing_ and _keep making the situation worse_ . Until you solve the _actual_ problem (hint: it's not the _men_ ) society will continue to collapse. Enjoy the decline. 💊

I lost my father 3 years ago! Only now after I inherited his weight I'm able to feel what he went through and miss hil and want to talk to him over diner or coffee...rest in peace you are my hero, i just wish i had the same state of mind I have now years ago!

@@Rocknium1 amen brother... Took me a LONG time to forgive my dad and cultivate a relationship with him.. he passed away and we had just gotten started..... how sad life can be sometimes.... I didnt understand my dads stress and just thought he was an asshole.. now i get it...

It's crazy how you say it didn't affect you then turn around and drown everything out in smoke ......maybe one day that'll change

@@hectorhernandez5399 who are you replying to?

@@brianbailey462 was saying that based on self reflection...never knew him now I have my own little one to raise

Same here how do you handle having no father

@@legendkillersshittyduffleb932 Perhaps find a father figure if you are young, don't know if it'd appropriate if you are older though

@@johnjordan3552 well shit I'm 32 so it's probably inappropriate fml lol

@@legendkillersshittyduffleb932 I’m kind of in the same position, 22 and feel like I am missing a father to guide me

So, it's fair to say you aren't likely the baby's father then?

im also fatherless and im 22 women and i know some people who do statisticly theres many fatherless people

My children are fatherless, and as a single mom who tried everything to encourage him to be there for his kids…and no matter what I do, it’s a void that I have never been able to fill….and wow, the amount of children who grow up fatherless shocks me, it’s massively popular and destructive. It’s shameful and awfully sad sad sad

Awesome work

@@ColorMeRado thanks mate

@@savinggrace121 are you sure you didn't talk bad about him to the kids, and are you sure you didn't break up with him over something you two could have solved had you not been trigger happy to break up? 80% of divorced are initiated by myopic women.

I’m happy for you!

Why are you here then?

@@kimberley-7797 learning is important. Not to mention those without certain issues or hinderances (being fatherless or having a bad father) may not even realize how vital of a role their father played in their development. Personally I never gave it a thought because it was so “normal” to me. This video gave me more appreciation for my parents especially my dad and the great lengths they went to in developing me into a productive member of society.

@@robobiss444 this. I always thought my family was normal (present and loving mom and dad). Turns out I'm lucky

Beautiful ❤

Why are you raising her alone? Does mother want no part in her upbringing?

@@agr108 she kinda does her own thing 🤷🏻‍♂️ is what it is

This whole conversation is the typical TradCon *intellectual dishonesty* It's not _fatherlessness_ "problem" It's *SINGLE MOTHERHOOD* , they are using "fatherlessness" as a *euphemism* for it to subtly shift the blame onto *MEN* Blaming *MEN* yet again. To the uninitiated and low IQ it seems indistinguishable, but it's a _semantic_ game they're playing, as to not upset the _female_ base. You don't get to blame men for poor ♀ *CHOICES AND BEHAVIOR.* This intellectual dishonesty is why the traditional conservatives will _keep losing_ and _keep making the situation worse_ . Until you solve the _actual_ problem (hint: it's not the _men_ ) society will continue to collapse. Enjoy the decline. 💊

Some people are too exhausted to want to live... Healing takes time and care, live and soul food

It is, its just about all of you now.

I'm glad you mentioned SACRIFICING. IT IS DYING TO SELF FOR THE GOOD OF OTHERS. You also mentioned the REWARD, a legacy, a more perfect world.

Same I have experienced

“Until I realized he was the problem” - omg, that’s the most unique phrase ever!

Sounds like my father. Emotionally unavailable. Terrible communicator even though he thought he was the king of communication ironically, I think it was really on a superficial level and with his friends.

Lmao

im in the same boat. im almost 21 and im just now realizing how shitty of a father he was to me. i would always block it out by playing video games. the memories i have with him are very cloudy.

That was a very touching text you wrote. I am 18,now a CS major studying to be somebody in this life,but I have to admit that less than 1% of what I am today came from my father.He was present physically but never morally,I would say that he gave me as much as 5 advices in all these years,different from my mother and my brother that gave me the moral foundations in wich I stand today.My mom basically had to raise me and my brother alone while also working fulltime and let me tell me you,thats an homerical job for any woman.So I can say that I feel a part of your pain and share that feeling of loss that you have about your father and whenever you think that man are trash or that life's meaningless,remember every single person that has stories like ours but that achieved meaning in their lives.Have a great life and regards from Brazil🏖

​@@luisfelipearaujodeoliveira469 Thank you. I am truly sorry to hear about your father. I need to correct my last sentence to "every child has the right to be raised by a GOOD father and mother." I also gained my moral foundation through my mom who worked full time as well. It is comforting to hear your experience because I know that even though I suffer, other people suffer through similar things. And thank you for your advice, I really do appreciate it. Good luck with your studying and I wish you success and a happy life!

@@cadencemoran you too cadence 😉

Did your mom stop him from being involved? And would she even tell you the truth if you asked her this question? Maybe you should have a look at your case.

@@barefootarts737 It was an extremely messy divorce. Probably the worst divorce I've heard of. They went to court and my mom gained full custody. My dad suffers with mental issues and had a huge porn addiction. That's all I know and all I really care to know. It's in past. It aggravates me that their problems leaked into my life so I choose not to dwell on it in everyday life.

Surviving is quite common though, to really bloom in life, a fathers support can be the difference between surviving and thriving.

Why your mum decided to marry alcohol addict?

@@alexeysamokhin9629 most of the time it's hidden, especially when you don't live with the person beforehand. Or it started as just a few drinks and got heavier as time went by.

how did you survive. im stuck in the same issue right now and today everyone had a big fight and it was hell. my mother and my sisters anre now acared on what will we do if no one pays for the bills etc. we have no one in our city. please help im not from a first world country either

@@uziman1322 My mom went back to work, but we lived frugally. She also bought a house and rented out the top apartment. I was still in highschool and got a part time job after school and weekends. This was several decades ago on Canada. Good luck.

As challenging as it may be to experiment without any guidance I wish you strength and wisdom to become the kind of man you needed once in your life. All the best to you!

I would pay anything to attend a live class!!

Yep, students would attach connections and meanings to that because the tonality and the way he delivers it shows the rawness and power in thinking that way. You could tell that because he knows what it means, people are going to pick up on that same idea to, and that's heck of a lot to discover as a student. I don't know if regular college curricula would produce ideas like that because it feels as though running on expresso and behind a desk at a dorm memorizing facts seems like existential risk because why bother right? Money? No. It's about life! How do you correct the perspective of your life, so you know what you really want. Not to get screwed over by other people toxicity because they are purposeless as the other fellow who's berating them about what the material's cost or what culture/social norm blankly addresses you to behave, that's what Jordan Peterson teaches. Become the 99 percentile and grow away from dead crops. "Life's hard, man." - Dr. Jordan Peterson

I like Jordan but in this case he didn't teach you something. Is like saying to a homeless that lost everything: hey stop being poor ! You understand what I mean?

Never give up on life no matter how bad you think it gets. There's always hope, light if you have the courage to look for it. Best wishes to you.

Sounds like you have a great dragon in your house that you need to stand up and fight and get that gold.

Hey same situation here. I literally raised myself. However, you must push yourself through integration in society. I had no biological family but everyday I smile to people and many smile back and I know everything is great. I have a kid and the father hasn't seen her since she was 3, she will be 7. That was his decision, it is everyday. My heart breaks everytime she asks me about her dad. It is hard but there is nothing I can do but show her all my love.

I'm 42 and feel this too. Never been able to have a healthy relationship. It sucks

Really sorry to hear that

I'm so sorry. I had a dad who did the same, but got lucky and had an awesome stepdad. I guess the one thing I've learned is you really don't have to lead the life your parents lived. I've been married to my husband for nearly 18 years. We have two kids and they are so much happier than I ever was and so much more successful in the things they love and school.

All I asked my father for was the Truth a name and a wall. All he ever did was lie threaten me and my mother, and try to manipulate me into imatating a living version of my dead mother that he did not have to behave appropriately with. He only gets to see me once a week now over the computer with other family watching.

Sounds like mine too.... He continues to disrespect me, it's hard.... The struggle to honor him yet not be his vomit & 💩 pan. I keep it super superficial, happy birthday, happy father's day, happy to all the holidays and that's it.... Although, he continues to get upset since I'm such an unforgiving evil b***h. Trust me to just send a text when i don't want to, but i do, because my Heavenly Father tells me to honor and so i do, the struggle is very real! But, that's what adulting is right, you gotta put your feelings aside and do many things you may not feel like.

@@boliviandimples well the good news is that we are grownups now and we make our own choices now. I would like to say there is hope, but how often do vindictive narsasists change. Pigs might fly first and not the political or bad Leo kind.

@@songoftheblackunicorn666 They may never.... But, we shouldn't give them power to change us.... Be blessed❣️

At least he left you with a point of reference. Ask yourself "what would Dad do?"

Remember the legacy and pass the baton to your son my friend. you got this! i believe in you.

Many fathers had absent fathers themselves due to various wars and working away from the family. But lack of effort to resolve issues by helping the next generation isn't an emotional issue. It is laziness. And when a father is lazy, he disables his whole family - the women in the family are left to do it the domestic work and the physically harder work eg DIY, gardening...some people should not have children because they don't intend to look after them, they just want their wives to look after them.

Stop making excuses. They knew the pain of their childhood so they should have done everything to not let it happen to their children. They should have been man enough to break the cycle.

As challenging as it may be to become a man without guidance and encouragement, I wish you strength and wisdom to become the kind of man you once needed in your life and change the pattern that was passed onto you by an irresponsible guy. All the best to you!

I grew up in a two parent home but my father wasn’t really present or involved. He did the bare minimum and it felt like he was just going through the motions. Meanwhile I saw my peers’ fathers and thought how great they were. I absolutely grew up depressed and demoralized. I had TV and video games to forget about that void. It took me 25 years to understand my father was not well and a posturing clown. To this day he still treats me beneath him and says discouraging things. I really tried to “win” his respect and did well in school and have a great career but I learned he would never respect me. Ironically my dad is just like my mom’s dad. I get my fight from my mom and her mom who had to put up with disappointing men and are both incredibly selfless and hard working people. I know I’m luckier than most people but sometimes I feel it would have been better not knowing my father at all.

Hey man, you are doing great and everything will be ok!

Your first sentence, speaks of my dad. Too much.

A lot people do not deserve marriage or kids. Yet, a lot of us would not be born. So we learn, the hard w ay.

i hope u were there for u future daughter or son because i am fatherless also abuse by a father but i forgive him but i want to have a healthy family in near future have a husband

@@Angela-vm3kc pray, forgive and let go. We evolve over time, and the prayer renews us. Daughter hopefully , I never had any siblings and I wana alot of kids in the house.

@@4inaftermath454 right but i hope that we will be more better as a parents we want kids because we do like to learn and be parents i am 22 and seriously i got stronger over time

@@Angela-vm3kc we will , we know what good parenting produces and what it doesn’t , book have been written , we have experience and our own will and values. Yes , we develop the strength to do many things ,we learn patience as well that one is the hardest for me .

Good on you sr, i am in a similar boat to yourself. Im 21 my father died when i was 10 and long story short we never got the opportunity to engaged in a real father son relationships to begin with. I just started university this last week, i hope to be in a similar position you find yourself in 3 years form now when i graduat. Best of luck and health to you and your partner, may you have a wonderful weding and raise some beautiful children

That is very well said and makes the most sense.

That‘s so true! However the question is: how can the curse be broken - cause I certainly won‘t have kids until I can make sure I won’t pass that on to the next generation..

@@DelasVC Get your shit together to the point where you know yourself emotionally (a real man knows how to control his emotions), your virtues, your flaws, your passion, what gives you strenght and confidence. Make mistakes and learn from them, tell the truth and get in trouble, learn when to tell the truth and when to shut up, face the hard realities of the world and learn how to get the best out of society from a pragmatic point of view. Isn't that the father we all wish we had? My original comment was meant for everyone to have a little sympathy for our old man that certainly didn't do the best job ever, but he probably didn't know any better.

True, BUT: a son can get his shit together even if the father doesn’t have his shit together but enforces a minimum standard of behaviour. Getting out of bed in the morning, going to school, minimum screen time, doing homework doing chores, getting a part-time job, not fighting, minding the law, treating girls with basic respect/not getting girls pregnant, keeping promises. Any kid that has that + not being abused will be ok.

@@CarlosRodriguez-bh2ey Yes! Control your emotions!! Yes-that’s the best thing anyone can learn. Especially since the opposite is now taught.

You should work it out with him so the cycle doesnt continue and then forgive yourself and be who you now want to be

Wow; you sound like you were my dad , I wish my father reAlizes what you’re realizing right now. And Trust me, as a son, I’d appreciate the change of heart if you were my dad, it’s the first step bro❤️

You sound like you were doing the best you could. Today forward is what matters now. I hope you reach out to him. I'd want you to. Even if he doesn't respond well now, he may later. All you can do is try, and if you don't the answer is already no.

You are extremely self aware for even realising this, so don’t beat yourself up too hard. You seem like a decent, responsible person

@@jasonhutchins9239 I love the recommendation.

Psalm 27:10, “When my mother and father forsake me, the Lord will take care of me.”

how long mate?

Same boat here. I did finally meet him when I was 40 (7 years ago). It was less than pleasant. And yeah, it has been difficult, but I'm a Dad now, and I've ended the cycle, my daughters are 20 and 12, and I'm married to the same lady. Just know you aren't alone.

@@benjimanbunn I was seven when he left. 30 when he died.

@@riggermortisfpv526 Such a heartwarming comment. Pleased for you and your family. Thanks for sharing, bro.

He's the one who is fkd up.

Fuck me did he project himself onto you. You are worth all the love in the world, you have value and you bring this world joy just by existing and many are waiting to experience that world of wonderment with you and through you to create something glorious in this life that multiples human existence. May life bless you and uplift you always ❤️

you and me both friend. God be with you

@@kylehassan972 God bless you my friend. It's tough, but we gotta hang in there. Prove them wrong. We are more than we realize.

I feel a big sadness 😔. My only child has not seen her father since she was 3 and now she be 7. I used to go to him so she could see him when she was a baby and he would always cancel. One time when I picked her up he did not let me go and I went through hell. Sometime before he almost killed me.. Then he did porn revenge and I got a PO for life but haven't really process anything for the revenge. I did not even knew he was married on paper, even though he wasn't with the wife and she was married to someone else. He is 13 years older. He has two older kids and he takes care of them he is the custodian. It is difficult for me to understand how he loves those kids but not our kid. I mean I see my kid and I wonder why wouldn't he want to even know how his own seed is doing. I know he will never show her care and it is just sad. The last time I spoke to him 4 years ago he said he regretted getting me pregnant that it was the biggest mistake of his life and that he was only the sperm donor. He is such a coward. I will never disintegrate.

I would not sugar coat it. My child’s father has issues that he chooses not to do anything about. Unless it is ordered by the court, there will not be any interaction between them. Not once a year or every few years, how could anyone form a bond with that? Also, that would be teaching my child the irregular and inconsistent visits are acceptable.The truth will be spoken and if it makes him look bad, then that is on him. There is only so much empathy one can have to a persons situation and I will not choose to have that negative energy (his burdens) around my child.

Why did you get pregnant by an alcoholic?

@@isisg666 Why did you choose to have a baby with a man that does not love you and does not want to raise a child with you?

@@cristinanatea948 I did not chose that hahaha. I was 18 he was 31. I always used condom and sometimes spermacides. He told me and my face and txt message he got me pregnant on purpose so I would stay with him so he could keep on manipulating and screwing each other up and so I could keep on taking care of his kids hahaha. He said he made small holes to the condoms. I don't know I just know I never wanted to get pregnant. Aborting was not an option at the time. I got my bachelor's either way. Sucks that my kid don't have male role model, I didn't have mom and dad, never met them. Hahah I am laughing at my comment I was sad that day. Life is beautiful away from toxicity. Though I would never deny him his right to her. He knows that but also I cannot force him. Oh well life goes on.

❤️❤️❤️🙏🙏🙏

❤️ Thank you, praying for you too 🙏🏼❤️🌸

Beautiful works sr. Sending love and prayers back your way

Knock that crap off. I can't wait until RU-vid enables a "hide proselytizing comments" filter.

@@n2bfw884 💜💙❤💜

Wow, the hard truth...kinda sucks though

Same

Maybe you are lucky. My dad terrifies me

Allow Christ to be your father....He has helped me through sooo much

College usually takes 4 years to teach you what you can learn in less than year to bleed more $ from you.

Geez. Sounds like he needed to go, so you could better care for each other.

Were you married?

Yr truth probably not his

Women really think like this if I don’t like you or you end up making me not like you fuck you and them kids 😂

"hE walKEd oUT!" So you chose poorly to breed with, or those werent his kids. Your fault, just like *all single motherhood* is

I'm the exact same age and my father moved to another country when I was 12, to work. Saw him few times since. Last time was 8 years ago, but few months ago he called me after years of silence... to ask for money. No contact since. You can guess he hasn't paid it back neither. I always think that I should reach out to him as he always had huge problems with alcohol and such. Forgive before it's too late. Never actually considered that he actually just doesn't care, I'm not sure why. Always just blamed it on mental issues or that he stopped contacting us because it was too hurtful for him at this point, after years of fucking it up. Interesting that your post reminded me of that simple possibility.

@@aw2584 sorry to here man ,but yes its just what it is you know... Im not going to fight to get a father man i deserve one...and if he doesn't think like that.... Well... Thats to bad for him... im going to keep leaving my life... But if the poor idiot will need anything in the future hes gonna get shit... I dont know how you had the strength to give him any money, good for you man...

Likewise. Mine left me when I was 18 months. Contacted him when I was 16-17, we started messaging each other and I was excited. I thought it was going well. We even spoke on the phone. But then he suddenly blocked my number and me on FB. I was devastated. But then started messaging me a year and a half later with no explanation. This time his tone was different. He didn’t wanna know me. He informed me that he had one of my family members spying on me for him, for years. And he started insulting my mother calling her this and that. And how I was still the biggest mistake of his life. I knew he wanted me to lash out and give him a not to speak with me, but I still fell for it. The shit he said about my mother, he of all people had no right to say. Our last phone call we were screaming death threats at each other. And I gave him his reason. Been to therapy numerous times. I know what my problem is, but I can’t seem to fix it. I found out that no one had my mothers back during her pregnancy. Not even my own family. The day I was born, my dad (who works in the navy) voluntarily went out on a 2 week tour (despite being given absence by his CO or whatever) so he didn’t have to miss my birth. After my dad left, his parents still wanted to see me, so still I was 6 I saw my grandparents till they claimed my mum was abusing me (she wasn’t) and walked out of my life as well. They said they walked out to punish my mum. It didn’t punish my mum, it punished me. And shortly after that incident my dad had a little girl, he visited his parents (who live in the same area as me), my mum spotted him with his wife and baby in a supermarket, pointed him out, I chased after him. Tripped over something. I saw him looking me at. I began to cry and he walked off. I know it ain’t my fault, but it feels like it is. I didn’t get a choice about this situation. I’m 21 and I haven’t even had my 1st kiss because I’m too nervous to talk to women as I was never taught how. I got rejected from my dream job due to my history with self harming (which started when I was learning about who my dad was). And I feel an emptiness inside that I strongly believe he can fill. I had a dream years ago that best describes what I feel. I’m in a blizzard. I’m surrounded my lots of huts. I approach one and start banging on the door. I know there’s people in there as I hear them. All I wanna do is get out the cold. But then I see the curtain slightly open and I catch a glimpse of my dad. I start to bang louder and louder on the door. I know he sees me as we made eye contact, but he doesn’t open the door. So I leave and walk off. And I see my mum, stepdad and brothers yelling in at me, in a welcomingly way ‘Reece! Come in! It’s freezing!’ But I don’t go in. I run off trying to find others like me around the building into the forest. I find no one. And I get quite upset. So I decide to walk back to the house where my mums at, but my footprints have disappeared due to the snow. The door at my mums house ain’t open anymore. I don’t bother knocking, but look thru the window. I see my mum and stepdad playing with my brothers like a perfect family. Without me. I walk off and start to cry. That’s when I realised that I’m truly alone. I don’t blame anyone but myself. So I walked into the blizzard and disappeared into the snow. And that’s when I woke up.

@@reecen819 its beautiful man. sad, but very beautiful. if you ever need a friend even if its a youtube friend. :)

@@user-wu7cj4qe4t cheers mate. Appreciate it.

good for you! god bless

Yes,...we can have the Heavenly Father,...instead....

I was not healed right away, but I have a relationship with God as such a young age when I told Him that he is my father, because I heard from someone or somewhere that He is a father to the fatherless. And I as live and evolve as a person He became what I needed the most in my life. He truly is good and loving. I would have been destroyed by my anger and resentment if I have not known Him my real Father and the True Lover of My Soul!

Same here. ❤️

I love this 🥰

And isn't used NEARLY enough.

Single mothersplaining?

youre have delusional beliefs about your "incredible" ability to balance... youre not very intelligent and you need to be told outright that youre simple and grossly prideful of your own personal failure to supply a healthy, two parent family for your child or children... no, youre not doing a good job, and no you do not have sufficient awareness or knowledge of what's going on to make such a stupid and simple comment. youre just wrong, basically all-entirely each as a person and as a "parent"... dumb people like you annoy me.

So you're writing this from the grave???

what? howd his dad die when he was 19 if youre his father?

She's a woman

God has given him such a gift!