Reading the comments, I can't help but disagree and say that perhaps the girl is someone whom is recovering from a previous abusive dependent relationship, thus why she 'cannot accept such a gentle love'. She's in a healthy relationship now and because her partner is treating her right, she doesn't know what to do because she's used to someone abusing her. Something like that.
I believe it is something like that. She's so used to her former toxic relationship that she can't accept the relationship she is in now. Another theory people say is that she hangs herself? One evidence is that she says she needs someone to substitute to live. To sum it up, she likes the feeling she has with her present lover but because she is so used to her former relationship, she ends up killing herself? Also, it's probably noticable that she's harming herself due to the fact that she can't accept being in a better relationship.
The translyrics on the video are a bit off. Not completely inaccurate: it captures the tone well and flows well enough, just lost the nuance in trying to make it rhyme. Originally, the translated line by HnY was closer to "Like these wounds belong to someone else." (I'm not good at interpreting lyrics, so have a go at it.)
I completely agree with your comment as I recognize myself in this song. I've always been mistreated in love and sadly: I got used to it. Now that I am in a wonderful and loving relationship I sometimes found myself wondering why my partner loves me, how could he be nice or even respectful towards me? I just can't accept it... I still think that I don't deserve happiness. Hopefully I'm doing better, learning how to be happy again with the help of my precious love. (And for anyone who's dealing with abuse, even if you are scared: Talk to someone who listens to you, Get some help. You can't let someone steal your body, your mind and your life. I've been there too: I believe in you, stay strong
As someone who has been in an abusive relationship this song really does speak the truth on how it feels to try to find love again, when you're finally treated like a actual person again it's heartbreaking, almost too good to be true. You don't want to believe it's real, you've been put in a mindset of worthlessness
same here. this song seems painful to me. ik how my 1st lover horribly treated me and that's why this song is relatable. sadly, even tho after 2y i found friends and new relationship, i found myself being thankful for bare minimum with my new narcissistic lover. circle repeated itself again, cuz i was too much traumatised already, and i got abusive relationship again. bitter type of pain.
Yeah I agree with this. About a month ago I was in a very abusive relationship. A lot of people I talked to always to me to end it off but I never did because before with a previous relationship, I had been brought down to a state of worthlessness to where I had zero self respect. When I came into the one after that, the feeling of her actually treating me like a normal person had me paranoid. I was always paranoid of things but being with herat the start made it worst due to how greatly she treated me. It almost felt like it was too good to be ture. almost fake. But I psuhed those feelings aside and went with it. I had a lot of things wrong in my head from the ex before but this one made me feel happy around her. It was almost like a drug. If I wasn't near her for a second I felt like my life was crumbling and my anxiety was tearing me apart for the whole time of us being apart. She was just the sweetest person on the planet and I loved her for it. But it then just went downhill a few months into the relationship all of a sudden and that's where the verbal and mental abuse came in. She had anger issues. And bad ones at that. She would get angry at the smallest things. Some people would make her angry but shr would someowhat be patient with them. me on the other hand, regardless if I meant to or not (99% of the time I unkowingly do), she let's out the worst on to me. I get cursed at, insulted, you name it, she's done it. then she would threaten to break up. there were times she has broken up with me because of it but we always got back together. She wasnt as aggressive with it as my ex before her, but it did make things immensly worse. My anxiety and paranoia were just going haywire. In a way, she indirectly made me feel like I wasn't shit without her. I felt that if i wasn't with her, I would be in such a bad state to where I probably woulnd't be around. Obviously that never happened and i'm glad to have the people around me that helped me through the break up. I ruined friendships because of that relationship and I horrible for the friends that I ended up losing. Luckily we became friends again but the guilt just eats me alive every single time. I've just gotten better at hiding it so no one would worry. Idk why i rambled on about that... my bad 😆
Hanatan can easily sing songs of different genres/types in a really beautiful way. Heres one of my favourite ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-_Ay46hP7CjI.html
It don't know why, but every Song from Kikuo just has such a special feeling to it, it goes from panic attack vibes to sad emotional parts or creepy parts. I think this is a really rare kind of music, where you can just feel the whole emotions and anxietys with the characters in the Song. I love it
Kikuo is a master with these sorts of songs, and another vocaloid producer who touched such sad subjects but made such magnificent songs with those subjects, (insanity meets harmony if you must,) is the late Wowaka. His most famous piece is 'Rolling Girl' which was a song about a girl who was driven to suicide by those around her. The vocals are beautiful gut the song is heart wrenching.
This is what I like most about his song, like the music is really upbeat and happy sounding but his lyrics are total opposite.this is something which make his music really unique.
hanatan is truly a powerful singer, and the instrumental really brings that out- the end of the pv reminds me of someone being h//nged and i dont like it
He estado investigando todas las canciones que ha tenido kikuo, y tal vez no me guste alguna, pero verdaderamente no he encontrado ninguna canción mala, lo cual es bastante sorprendente...
I remember listening to this song while i was in a shitty relationship, this song kept playing in my head while i suffered depression and was on the edge of suicide, almost as if my brains warning me about something to come... listening to it now it hits different..
Something about the way this video is animated is just so unsettling. Like, the way the girl moves just looks so unnatural in every way, I don't know... It's like some weird uncanny valley stuff goin' on and it's just so good man
One of the details that I love about this is song is the mood and imagery that it has, I’ve heard that this song is about an abusive relationship and so it makes sense the way that at the start the singing and imagery is calm (like on the start of a relationship, when it’s all lovely and happy) and then it slowly turns dark and uncomfortable (when the relationship is not what you expected and it ended up being a horrible experience)
i'd also like to think the bandage on the OC's face that keeps appearing since the song gets darker are victim trying to not see what's going on and ignore it until the wounds are too bad so the bandage falls off by itself
That's exactly how it feels when I listen to this. Everything from my previous relationship flashed into my head and all i could do was just cry. it was very traumatic, especially since I've been in two abusive relationships back to back. Started off great. Ended miserably.
Does anyone else think that the story depicts a girl who feels uncomfortable with having a healthy relationship because of abuse from her childhood instead of a relationship? I think the imagery (background in the beginning, outfit) resembles more of a child than adult.
Honestly, that's kinda how I see it because I relate to it, a lot. I'm in a good relationship, I'm being treated well, but the love doesn't hurt like I always thought it was supposed to. Now I can't help wanting him to hurt me, because that's what love always was, to me. Pain. Helplessness. Submission. I don't know how to accept this gentleness. The eyes reminded me of the paranoia abuse can cause, always expecting to be hurt.
That’s how I interpret it, then again I interpret songs like this to my personal experience, others might interpret differently (aah bad grammar sorry, it’s late in Germany, and I forgot how to speak English for a sec sorry)
The way she’s ‘grabbing her bangs’ (as some people in the comments said) is really meaningful to me, because sometimes when you’re panicking, you grasp at nothing. You grasp for any kind of leverage, because you feel as if you’re falling. I like how Kikuo added that detail.
“Can’t ignore the horrors that I’ve seen.” 2:54 (subtitles) By her “grabbing her bangs”/scratching her face, it could be a method of s3lf h@rm, trying to cover/blind her vision so she doesn’t see anymore trauma like that. My uncle has worked at a clinic and has had at least two patients forcefully sent in with scratches on their eyes and face, they’ve both said the same thing; (or similar, as trauma is not always the same) “I don’t want to get better. I don’t want to see anymore.” It gives me chills whenever he tells that story. And it’s heartbreaking to hear that there are such coping mechanisms out there.
Severe Trauma survivor’s usually have the tendency of attempting to claw out their eyes bc they don’t want to see their trauma, which is why she’s scratching her face
[Verse 1] Yorisotte tada soba ni ite Tokei no hari ga susunde yuku Atataka na sono shiawase o Watashi no karada ga uketsukenai [Interlude] A, a [Verse 2] Kara no kara no sora ni aita ana no yō Kara no karada moroi hazu no kokoro wa Furukizu darake no ibitsu na katachi [Pre-Chorus] Yugande iru no desu [Chorus] Chi darake no ai dake o kudasai Fuan de konagona ni waresō de Dakara setsunai yo [Verse 2] Yasashikute dakara honto wa Itsumademo tsuzuite hoshii Sasayaka na kono shiawase o Watashi no kokoro wa ukeirenai [Bridge] Hinekurete iru no desu Shikata ga nai no desu Gaman shite gaman shite Betsujin no yō na kizuato darake desu [Chorus] Chi mamire no kuchizuke o kudasai Kowareta hitogawari ga hoshii no Chi darake no ai dake oh kudasai Fuan de barabara ni kudakesō Dakara Samishii yo Zutto
I have never felt so disturbed by a PV before. The way she morphs and rubs her face just translated for me the tone of anxiety and pain from the song - I was getting chills!
after 2:27 makes me feel anxious, but before 2:27 I can handle the song. I just don’t really like the eyes in the wall part, it’s so creepy, yet impressive.
My analysis of the whole shabam: The main character, the lady, is not currently in an abusive relationship; she is actually trying to recover from one. After the old unhealthy relationship, she has found herself a new lover, one that is kind and treats her gently. However, her heart "shakes and says it can't accept that gentle happiness" (0:22), signifying that she is used to her old abusive relationship and something twisted inside of her is making her want to go back to that kind of love rather than accept the happiness she is currently feeling (maybe she is stuck in the mentality that she is not "worthy" of her current kind lover, which the tearing of her face and body signifies, or her past relationship could have twisted her to the extent that that is what she now sees as love). The main character is struggling with her conflicting emotions of her past and present, leaving her filled with a feeling of emptiness, or a covered hole (0:52). Her consciousness of these conflicting feelings is seen through her internal monologue and her physical destruction of herself, maybe trying to make herself snap out of it or simply going insane from all these conflicting feelings she's having, doing anything to make them stop. She can't stop this feeling of wanting to go back to her abusive relationship from consuming her, with enough not being enough (1:40). This want is constantly hurting her (1:55) in both senses that she wants it to stop, but what method will appease her? Being happy or going back? What can she do? What is she able to do? All these questions leave her going crazy, just wanting to get the pain and suffering out somehow and figure out an answer to her future. She _wants_ her future to be a happy one with the kind lover, but her heart is "...set to set intent apart" (2:10), or in other words, set to push her away from what she is trying to do (her intent) which is to be happy. Her heart either does not want or accept the kindness she is now getting, causing her to panic and revert back to what she is used to, or her abusive relationship. She knows she is broken, as can be seen from the rest of the video. She says she only wants kisses stained in red (3:17), which we can assume is blood maybe from her abuser abusing her or just from violence in general. In the end, this want to go back to what she's used to wins over, and she decides to leave her happy relationship. However, she does not return to the abusive one because she knows it's not good; it's just the thing that's keeping her apart from being happy. Because of this fact and her knowledge that she is too twisted to be happy, she is sent on being alone, "for life" (4:11). As to the reason why she keeps hurting herself, maybe she feels she deserves it for her unnatural feelings toward abuse and how she isn't able to accept genuine love. Or her internal conflicts are just driving her mad enough that she does not want to feel anything anymore; just emptiness. Maybe it will be better for her that way. I hope this helped some of you analyze the song, and if it didn't, then leave your opinion on what you thought it meant down below! Thanks :))
The saddest part for me is the fact there’s a faint shadow of a rope in the top of her head.. And the fact the center of gravity of how she sways is mainly her neck…. Meaning she’s already hanging…. Someone mentioned this too..
@@agachansilencekyaCan you respond to this comment so I know you’re still alive? I may just be another stranger on the internet but I just want you to know you have to keep trying. You cannot give up.
@@agachansilencekya Please stay here. Stay and try to make your life better for you and as hard as it seems you can do it. There will be hard times but you have to keep pushing through.
I really love how you can almost tell what its about by just looking at the mv, it is nice, pastel and pink covered in flowers when it suddenly fades into a rotted tile. In the first part of the lyrics when the setting chamges it says "Aah, like a pit opened in the empty void that is the sky" as we begin to see the tile start to crumble, as if opening something new. The second portion is "my husk of a body and heart that should be tender are" as she starts twitching and grabbing at/itching her fave, as if shes uncomfortable in her skin. "Distorted forms covered with old wounds" is the next part, she begins to do a motion that somewhat looks like shes crying or trying to cry, as if shes in pain, she also vegins twitching more here as if she were being distorted, and right before the next part of the lyric, a bandage appears over her right eye. The next lyric being "completely perverted" as she suddenly calms down and starts swaying, as if the enjoys the sexual attention. And then the lyric "please only give me love that is dripping with blood" continues, as she continues to grab at her face and another bandage appears on her left arm, she quickly appears closer to the screen as the rotted tile fades to a blood red and the edges of the screen are faded with black while tons of blood drips down behind her, she is also much more twitchy here, possibly the most twitchy she gets in the entire mv, the blood red background give us a hint to the lyrics as dose the bandage on her arm, but how she is panicing is rather unsettling, just as how the voice and bgm are in this part, the following lyric is "anxiety has me as if im crumbling to bits" the shakiness/panicing is a very obvious sign of the anxiety, but instead of the crubling background like before, instead, its shaking violently, as if someone was trying to make it crumble, same goes for the next lyric "and its so excruciating" as another bandage appears over her other eye, and the entre mv, vocals, and bgm start to calm down, as if she finds it comforting, the regular brown tile is back and she begins swaying again as the following lyric appears; "to tell the truth, because youre so gentle" as if she finds nothung wrong with how she is being hurt, and how she finds abuse to be 'gentle' "i wish this could go on forever" is the next lyric, possibly further proving my point in how she finds comfort to the sexual attention. "This tiny bit of happiness - my heart is unable to accept it" possivly trying to say that she does not know true love, and only knows abuse and torture, after that lyric, the bgm starts to get violent again and she starts twitching once more, getting more and more extream with every twitch, "the fact is, im completely twisted" the song says next, as she starts to do the crying motion again, now im not sure if she means 'twisted' in a mental way, or a physical way, as she does state many times that she "enjoys the pain"in some ways, but whenever she twitches, her head if often brought down to her stomach, and her arms flail while her body begins to distort. Some of the rotting tiles begin to fall. "The fact is nothing can be done" she begins twitching again, while doing the same crying motion. "Endure it. Endure it" more tiles begin to fall and she starts violently twitching again, as if shes panicing once more. "Im so riddled with scars its like im a different person" can further prove that she sees nothing wrong with the abuses that shes receiving, instead caring about her appearance. Yet by then she stops twitching and she finally puts her arms back down to her sides and keeps swaying, until the entire song/mv becomes violent again, she comes closer to the screen and grabs at her face again, revealing that now both or her arms are badaged, but the different thing about this outburst of the mv is now there are eyes peeking out from the other side of the tile "please give me kisses smeared with blood" proving how she views love as something violent. "Im broken. I desperately want a substitute in my place"the eyes are twitching just as she is, as if they were looking for something in a panicked way "please give me love that is dripping in blood" as the blood in the backround starts pouring again. "Anxiety has me as if im being broken apart to pieces" she is still grabbing at her face. The blood starts dripping faster. "And so i am lonely" possibly stating that her abuser hes left her for good since she cant keep herself together(reference to another lyric) "forever more" the mv starts calmjng down, her entire fave is bandaged up and she puts her arms back down, she eyes dissappear and she begings swaimg again as the mv moves down to show her bandaged legs Now, i saw a comment that said that she was swaying whenever she calmed down because she jad already hung herself before the song/mv even takes place, i really love this. The end portion where it shows as low as her ankles
This interpretation is making me think this is the same character featured in ごめんねえごめんえね. Although this could be about a different person considering ごめんねごめんね is based around a little girl who was r4p3d and abused by specifically her father, there IS a possibility it could be her, because I don't think Kikuo/Kikuohana confirmed the meaning behind it. People all have different perceptions of this song.
I barely know any Japanese but the emotion in the singer’s voice is so strong and the visuals really pull it together. I’ll probably be listening to this on repeat for days 😭
Aside from the jokes and meaning that people are talking about in the comments. Can we appreciate the fact that the person singing this has a beautiful voice?
everyone talked about the voice and the ambience while i'm here getting goosebumps because of the animation, when the girl starts glitching its just so weird to me but pleasing
@@savannahwiliams7203 No. No he did not. Kikuo does not have a single Music Video he made himself. Hanamushi made the music video, and has made many other videos for other Vocaloid producers. Most of the MV's in Kikuo's songs are made by Si_ku.
I think the saddest part of this whole song for me is the fact that her center of gravity in the swaying is her neck. Meaning shes already hanging by her neck the whole time shes in the video.. Im not sure what this could symbolize, but its what runs chills down my spine every time i watch this Edit: even more chilling, the only times she has most control over her body (ie, not hanging by her neck), shes having clearity moments in her brain which cause her to scratch at her face and cut herself. Absolutely chilling
It's interesting how Kikuo repeats words from song to song in such a similar way. People have pointed out the similarities with Gomenne Gomenne, and there's also a part similar to Kara kara kara no kara on 0:52 I love this song, it captures the feeling beautifully
Lyrics: Side by side we lie, happy in each other's grasp Tending our together, never ever ticking hands Yet my mending heart, safely placed inside your arms Shakes and says it can't accept that gentle happiness Ah.. Ah, like a vacant sky recovered to be covered with a hole Both my defenseless core and empty form resemble such an air Where they're contorted and distorted, cut with cuts that never close Staring back at me Please leave me bleeding lovesick for the sickest sort of love On edge I bet, I bet "enough" can't be enough to hold me up No, it just keeps me hurting... Still, your gentle ways fill my heart and make me wish We could stay like this for forever and a day All the while my heart, set to set intent apart Panics and forbids that bit of modest happiness Hideously twisting with a feeling Can't ignore the horrors that I've seen Bandage and manage, yeah I'm trying But the cuts stick to my skin time after time Are they even mine...? Please only loan me kisses if your lips are dressed in red I need a break, a breaking substitute to live instead Please leave me bleeding lovesick for the sickest sort of love That kind of kind, I know it shows how broken I've become Yes, it's why I'll be lonely For life...
I think the background is actually her face and whenever she's scratching or covering it the back shows what she's doing to herself,The last part probably was her skin falling apart due to self harm and then her face is fully covered in the bandages.
I just realized that the sylable count in the English subtitles matches the Japanese vocals almost perfectly. I am so impressed, wow. It even lines up in tempo and everything.
Um... 14 year olds? Edit: okay the reason I commented this is because of gacha Probably a stupid reason but I've seen so much shit in the toxic side of the gacha community I know, because I was in the community I used to seeing those things.. so I'm sorry about my comments here
@@PussyLicker-eg7sj This song is so damn dark. Do they even know? They're probably 14 year olds who find this song so " Relaxing ". It's a song about a Toxic relationship/Abuse It literally gave me the chills when i listen to this.. i do not find this comforting ._. Kikuo makes creepy-a** Vocaloid songs.
This is beautiful.. From the innocent look to the dark lyrics, this song is truly a work of art. I can relate in so many ways too many to mumber; this truly is beauty.
@@imnotnotgameiacmaniac5327 innocent as in the beginning, the short hair and dress, a almost childlike appearance conveying innocence until it got dark.
You pause at 1:20 The US lyric says “staring at me” while the UK lyric says “Completely perverted” and if you put those two together you get “staring at me completely perverted” I didn’t see this at first and I’m glad I kind found it because it sounds/looks like a Easter egg 😅
eh imo this one isn't so creepy for me the creepiest is the 'chiri chiri juso' vid... idk i remember my first time watching that and i just felt really, really uncomfortable, the visuals and the music..
@@ghostscales8120 oh well I guess everyone has their definition of creepiness, I find the MV of this song creepy , and the one of chiri chiri judo weird but not creepy.
En mi opinion esta en kikuo quizo representar a una persona que paso por una infancia o relacion muy toxica, dolorosa y llena de sufrimiento. Pero despues de haber 'escapado' de esa relacion encontro a alguien que la trataba bien o que la cuidaba pero ella no habia superado sus traumas pasados y piensa que en la manera que la trataban antes es lo que tiene que sentir con esta nueva peraona que conocio. Nose si se entendio bien lo que queria decir pero gracias kikuo y hanatan por dejarnos esta obra de arte ありがとごさいます! きくおさん と はなたんさん。
The lyrics, those inhuman movements she does, the unsettling musical parts, the eyes that stares at her while she falls in despair. All in this song is the perfection of mental breakdown and sadness.
I saw this yesterday and thought to myself, “I’m never watching this again.” Today, I felt an odd urge to listen to some kikuo music and lo and behold, this song was the first thing on my recommended. We’re too far in, y’all. There is no escape.
The song is meant to leave you with a sense of unease and helplessness because that is what most people feel like directly after escaping long term abuse. If they’re self destructive they’ll want to be comfortable and happy but their emotions are still likely volatile after the previous relationship and being self destructive doesn’t go well with unpredictable emotional swings. Trust issues seems to get the big green checkmark too. She’s shown developing scars because she’s just now starting to process the trauma that she went through with all the emotional weight attached. It’s meant to be representative of how she feels she’s falling apart and needs something even temporary just to bring her back out of it. It’s really hard to explain but when you’re just out of that situation and you’re emotionally volatile one moment you’ll be completely fine, you’ll start to feel your mood lowering almost as if your happiness is all slipping away, and the next moment you’ll be lashing out at yourself and anyone you see as a threat. I personally understand all of those feelings and I can confirm the most likely outcome was suicide. When you’re without hope and constantly panicking about everything because you feel like you’ve lost your grip on reality (that the reality that you have lived is not normal or okay) and all the processing and lonely nights crying feeling like everyone would be better off if you just ended everything and the pain would all be over. I personally understand every last bit of it, i’ve lived it and i’m just now moving away from the painful process of realization into the part where I think all of the things over that I can still remember and find a way through all of it. For those of you who resonate as strongly as I do with this song I hope your recovery is coming along well and just know no matter what that you are never alone, we all love you and we’ll all be here for you when you’re in your darkest moments and you just need someone to reach out to, talk to, share some fun jokes with, or just sit in the presence of another to be comfortable. No one had ever done that for me and I felt like less than absolutely nothing so I want to give you that reassurance that I never felt from reading those stupid ‘everything gets better u just gotta grit ur teeth and take it’ inspirational quotes. I understand, I’ll tell you right now, no matter how long it hurts just push forward through all that emotional fog even if it takes days or years even when you’re at the edge of nothing remember you’ve come this far and remember that you cannot give up after everything. If you need it take a break however long you need, just remember that you’re important, everyone loves you even when you doubt that love someone who loves you will never want to break you. And one day I promise if you do just try to hold on you’ll look back, like I am right now, and you’ll realize, just as I have here, that the fog clears slowly as you go and one day you’ll see clearly again, maybe not perfect but clear.
Thank you for making this comment, genuinely. I relate to most of this, and even tho I believe my tramua is very small, it did help me realize how much it still affects me
Thank you so much for writing this, my emotionally abusive father just passed away and so i am stuck in this hazy part of my life where the lack of constant abuse makes me terrified i hate it so much its like i need it in my life that without the trauma and constant pain i am nothing so it means a lot. to hear this from somebody else. i thought for so long i was alone but its extremely comforting to know i am not
@@username-userr - I know the pain of an empathy head and heart and i’m still struggling with depression and panic disorder. But it gets easier as it goes. I know not to tell someone in recovery that it just gets better, it takes some work and time, and your feelings about all of this should never be invalidated. Once you start to come out again you’ll start to realize who you want to be as a person and I hope you’ll have someone in your life to be there when you’re down. I wish you well, no matter what you’re going through know you aren’t alone and if you need to talk through that stuff there’s people who understand and who will listen.
@@cinderheartmeow6032 thank you and i wish you well too, it allmeans a lot and hopefully i can look back on this part of my life and let out a sigh of relief that it is over
This song feels like me. Basic kindness makes me feel a disgusting self-worthlessness, I drive away anyone kind to me becuz i cant feel i deserve it. The only thing that makes my existence is misery. Scars appear every day, I can only live in agony. It's something I wish could be changed, but only for others. I'll stay this way forever, I'm always, always expecting terrible comments, awful things that never come. From those around me, I feel like people hate me so much they'd want to see me die. Someone so damaged, I see others fixed. But I can't imagine it. Even the slightest kindness, a sense of agony comes alongside of it. How could anyone care so much. I'll be punished to make up for it.
I can relate.. I have an ex and i hate and love how kind he was, he wasn't like any kind of people i met in my life. He was kind, not selfish, he didn't call me useless, he never said I'm a toy to play with or that my feelings aren't valid, he never made fun of me for how i feel about something, he didn't say I'm stupid for not knowing something, he never raised a hand against me... he's the first person that made me feel loved, but i can't help myself but feel "disgusted" by how much i want something i don't deserve. I deserve everything that happened to me but i still want to be w him... i wanna throw up just thinking about how selfish i am... but I'm so in love, i wanna be selfish if it means i can be with him, because i know pushing him away would only make me feel even worse about myself. I hope you can find someone someday, i wish i could help you, but gl, ik u can do it! ^^.. I have to let him go though.. thank you for reading this long ass comment btw lol-
@@Yuki-2 Thank u and hey, i know itll be hard to one day overcome that feeling, if ever, that maybe you think u don't deserve such love from your partner.. but u deserve that love you have now, it's not selfish to receive kindness, it's not selfish to feel love i wish u luck too !
this literally screams "too used to abusive relationship I'm gonna hurt myself now because I don't know how to react to this kind of relationship and even though you love me and I love you I don't love myself bandage bandage scars blood sadness emotionally exhausted" Edit: hi everuone who finds this comment, thank you all for wishing me well, im perfectly fine LOL im sorry if this came out as venting i was just interpreting what the song meant thank you all for the likes and the kindness though, i appreciate it !! Edit again: oh goodness, 1.2k likes, mum i'm famous
I also wanted to point how unearthly GORGEOUS english translation is. How the translator uses repetition or alliteration to increase the power of a phrase. And just how the lyrics are both poetic and with their initial meaning?? Isn't they too good?? I'm enjoying the translation very much. Dear translator, if you see this, thank you.
I think the rubbing and scratching on her face is a metaphor for self harm, and how she says she can’t accept her partners gentle love because maybe she thinks she doesn’t deserve happiness and that’s why she hurts herself
2:21 OMG THIS SOUND FREAKS ME OUTTTTT it makes me so uncomfortable, while watching the animation it's even worse. The music, lyrics and image really go well together and make me feel something. Not to mention Hanatan's voice... She just gives me chills everytime.
Personally I believe this isn’t about recovery at all I think this is about pure manipulation Let’s say this person in the song is in an abusive relationship but refuses to believe because of the good partsTheir partner hurts,scars and causes more pain then ever but somehow get them to stay by always acting like the good guy in the end. She refuses to accept that “gentle happiness” because she knows it to be all fake but still doesn’t know how to escape and has nobody to run to. She keeps herself into believing that the abuse isn’t abuse and she has to take it to have the “good times” so she tries to make herself enjoy the pain too.
every of there songs always reminds me cp. The character depicted is of a pretty doll who looks like a child, innocent and pretty. Later horrendous stuff happens to her, and she gets scared. The scars never healed, depicting from the character. I also wanna introduce the idea od catabolism. Most songs I hear like these always tie back to r@pe, abuse, child neglect, or cannibalism. Shit that is not widely talked about in Japan's society.
The fact that even remembering the name of the song grosses me out and disgusts me is proof that kikuo has made a good job once again. Congrats, kikuo!
this song wracks my nerves in the best way. its so chilling and the visuals are terrifying and yet i find myself listening and watching the entire time. the vocals are beautiful. i seriously dont think kikuo is capable of making a bad song
Here is a better translation: We're just simply laying side by side The hands of the clock keep ticking on But such a warm happiness Is something my body can't accept. Like a gaping hole in the void of the sky Is my body similarly empty and my heart that should be fragile Contorts into a shape filled with old wounds. I am so horribly twisted.... Please only give me a bloody love It feels like my anxiety is tearing me into a thousand pieces That's why It keeps hurting.... Because you're so gentle, I wish this would last forever But such a modest happiness Is something my heart staunchly rejects. I am so terribly twisted.... There's no helping it..... Bear with it, bear with it.... But I'm covered in wounds as if they belong to someone else. Please give me a blood-stained kiss I want a broken substitute to take over for me Please only give me a bloody love My anxiety is tearing me apart That's why I'll stay lonely.... Forever
This seems like the middle of I'm Sorry I'm Sorry, where she gets in a relationship with a male who doesn't abuse her and r4p3 her, which her father did, which she mistook for "love". So she thinks the male doesn't love her.
I must vent a moment; A few months back, around 5, I ended a year long relationship ship with a 27 year old man. He is the most horrible man I know. I won't say my age, but I am still a minor. I met this boy a month after, and we've been in a relationship for three months now. I must say, I feel safe with him, and I'm so happy, but I simply can't forget what happened to me and it makes me feel weird. I simply cannot explain how this video and song makes me feel. Edit: thank you all for the support, sincerely.
у меня пограничное расстройство личности. эта песня-описание меня до терапии.я не любила партнеров ,я выбирала хоть кого-то, чтобы выстроить для них личность и не чувствовать себя пустым сосудом.я могла ненавидеть этих людей.но я создавала личность для них,чтобы иметь хоть какую-то личность.суррогат души. я теряла себя и становилась другим человеком.я ненавидела того,ради кого это делаю.но и не могла избавиться от этого человека, ради которого я строила личность.это песня полное описание моего прл.пугает и восхищает....
*ROMAJI* yorisotte tada soba ni ite tokei no hari ga susunde yuku atataka na sono shiawase o watashi no karada ga uketsukenai ā ā kara no kara no sora ni aita ana no yō kara no karada moroi hazu no kokoro wa furukizu darake no ibitsu na katachi yugande iru no desu chi darake no ai dake o kudasai fuan de konagona ni waresō de dakara setsunai yo yasashikute dakara honto wa itsumademo tsuzuite hoshii sasayaka na kono shiawase o watashi no kokoro wa ukeirenai hinekurete iru no desu shikata ga nai no desu gaman shite gaman shite betsujin no yō na kizuato darake desu chi mamire no kuchizuke o kudasai kowareta hitogawari ga hoshii no chi darake no ai dake o kudasai fuan de barabara ni kudakesō dakara samishii yo zutto
This video is honestly brilliant, the way she starts off “clean” at first and ridden of bandages but as time goes on and she continues to scratch her face and cry, the bandages completely take over her body and she can’t even see because of the bandage over her eyes
Has anybody else noticed that at the end when she sways, it kinda looks like a hung body without the noose? Just wondering... // By the way. Great job , Kikuo!
I saw a comment here somewhere that said the girl hanged herself because her center of gravity is her neck. I completely agree but i also just wanted to add that her aggressive jerking (time 2:20) happens when a person is hanged (in a way where they only die in 10-20mins, not instantly). Also because didnt die instantly could prove that she hung herself, not someone else hung her. Idk if im reading too much into this, but i just wanted to share this small theory :)
Something I barely noticed, but at the end, when the camera moves to the lower part of her body, you see her legs are still dangling... Like there was no floor...? Just something I noticed, not sure if there was any significance to it lol
@@adorifish please do not call s//cide "the Sayori thing" . it's a very real thing that affects many people , including me . even if you're joking , please , just don't .
@@underagechildgaming9938 you know what? I’m just gonna delete the reply. I don’t like saying “s*icide” directly (but I just did) because I couldn’t think of anything else,I understand what I did wrong,have a good day/night etc. ma’am/sir
It will end. Everything is gonna be better and you’re gonna feel happy, in this world there are 7 billion people and out of them there is at least 100 people who would actually die for you. Do stuff that makes you feel good, get a hobby. Even at some times having your favorite meal in the middle of the day while listening to your favorite songs can help make you happy. Make yourself a handmade gift in your favorite color, buy gifts for yourself, draw what you’re feeling right now and burn the paper as if your burning those feelings, write your feelings in one word on a balloon and pop it or if it’s helium let it go in the sky. There are accounts you can vent to in Instagram, you can try them. If you don’t have a pet get yourself one if you can, they really make you forget about all the problems you have by loving you as a thanks for taking care of them. And never forget to love yourself, after all, this is you who’s been worrying about you and your feelings and wishing for them to go. Say “thank you me” to yourself in the mirror and smile. It will be alright. You will be happy again soon
No, it never ends for me, I'll never be free from my past, it'll always creep up from out of nowhere, and ruin everything for me, and the people I love the most.
I love how the song progresses the girl gets more bandages showing how much their abusive relationship affected her and also the background making it a nice final touch as it gets darker and breaks when in the beginning it was all bright and cute is so cool
