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King David

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This is the beginning of King David’s story from the Bible, the books of Samuel. I’d like to animate the rest of the books of Samuel, but that would take an enormous amount of work, and not only would your support via Patreon be greatly appreciated, but would also attach your name to the project (DarkMatter Army or above).
/ darkmatter2525
Royalty-free music used:
“Prelude Tres Viste (BWV 995)” by Musicks recreation Milena Cord-To-Crax
freemusicarchiv...
creativecommon...
“Disco High” by UltraCat
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creativecommon...
“Mutant Rises (Action)” by Grégoire Lourme
listenanddownlo...
creativecommon...
“Redemption” by Grégoire Lourme
www.jamendo.co...
creativecommon...
“Car Crash” by Jahzzar
freemusicarchiv...
creativecommon...
“DZ” by Jahzzar
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creativecommon...
“Freedom soldiers” by Grégoire Lourme
listenanddownlo...
creativecommon...
“S1M4 2014” by Daniel Bautista
danielbautista...
creativecommon...
“Library” by Mister M
www.jamendo.co...
creativecommon...
“Space Opera” by Mister M
www.jamendo.co...
creativecommon...
“Devil generator” by Master of the Subway Ninjas
www.jamendo.co...
creativecommon...
“End Game” by Per Kiilstofte
machinimasound...
creativecommons...
“Evening Fall (Harp)” by Kevin Macleod
incompetech.com...
creativecommon...
“Fire arrows and shields” by Grégoire Lourme
www.jamendo.co...
creativecommon...

Опубликовано:

28 авг 2024

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Комментарии : 2,2 тыс.

@BlocksNinja 7 лет назад

I once had a bible teacher who taught us that God wanted Saul to kill the Amalekites' animals because the Amalekites were sorcerers who could morph into animals. It's odd how in ancient times there were sorcerers and magic everywhere and now that we have cameras and such they are nowhere to be found, huh? How unfortunate

@mikemillward1070 6 лет назад

Electric cables, powerlines and iron railway lines do much?

@Roam-de-route 5 лет назад

indeed, interesting how they disappeared along with the unicorns and dragons after the invention of the camera

@ibrahimismail7881 5 лет назад

The technology we have now is sorcery in a sense.

@vanessadotson8067 5 лет назад

Maybe i can help u whit that, i know its been a year but here goes, God flooded the earth because 200 of his angel came down an slept whit womens there kids became giants some as tall as 36ft the angels also mix animals an humans 2gather an there giant kids ate man they were doing magic an all kind of stuff an thats why God flooded the earth an the angels kids God turned them into evil souls the 200 angels went to hell an there kids are here on earth hunting us humans, so fun facts an GOD BLESS US ALL!!! Amen 😇😇😇

@johannfarmann8649 5 лет назад

Not that anyone would believe camera footage which suggested otherwise. It would be dismissed as a hoax. Who would take it seriously and risk being laughed at?

@ProfessorBorax 7 лет назад

The buzzfeed infowars evil spirit is absolute genius, I'm so impressed!

@BernardoPatino 7 лет назад

ProfessorBorax Kudos to the Twitter guy who suggested it. Someone tell us the username.

@pickyphysicsstudent201 7 лет назад

Would the offspring not be The Young Turks

@ProfessorBorax 7 лет назад

They would if the offspring of a black guy and a white chick was also white.

@jonnynice8366 7 лет назад

I rarely laugh out loud about RU-vid videos. This was one of those times.

@fredrickgoodwill285 7 лет назад

Buzzowars or infofeed

@amysofia5783 7 лет назад

That cow was freaking adorable. More cows drinking soda = A+ content.

@happymess3219 6 лет назад

Amy S 😊 i know right?... wasn't she cute?...

@leeeastwood6368 4 года назад

absolute bull!

@davidh6300 4 года назад

It's the simple things that people like

@DavidSmith-xs3or 2 года назад

Hell is only 200 miles below Detroit. Some people still consider Detroit to be like hell...although, downtown is experiencing a major comeback.

@authenticallysuperficial9874 2 года назад

100%

@unitic6378 5 лет назад

1030 BCE: "I'm sure killing in the name of God will never be a problem." 2001: 9/11.

@stewartgoodwin9488 4 года назад

9/11 was an inside job. You dont know that yet? Google "loose change"

@eagledown2872 4 года назад

Ur a dumbass aren't u?

@sourgummiescureyourpain4555 4 года назад

@@eagledown2872 *thou are a dumbass, aren't thou

@rodprops 4 года назад

@@stewartgoodwin9488 You beat me to that comment!

@thedeekabides 4 года назад

Haha haha killing in thr name of central banking interests. Iran is the only one left over there on their own currency.

@ShankarSivarajan 7 лет назад

"Pepe the frog is a perfect advocate for the LGBT community because the water turned the frogs gay." Brilliant!

@julzyboy8960 7 лет назад

I don't get it lol, could you explain the joke?

@ShankarSivarajan 7 лет назад

Bullion Productions sure. Pepe the frog is a popular meme used by the alt-right, who are not known for being friendly with the gays, and one of Alex Jones's most famous conspiracies was that industries were deliberately releasing chemicals into the rivers to turn frogs gay.

@user-hf3tc3su1b 3 года назад

@@ShankarSivarajan OMG GENIUS

@ursinecanine9657 2 года назад

Pepe is a toad

@NicholasLaDieu 2 года назад

@@ursinecanine9657 don’t be that guy. Lmao

@winterborn82 7 лет назад

As a 9 or 10 year old this was the the story that started the end of belief for me. My dad had spent a lot of time and effort teaching me to think rationally before he joined so many others in the religious wave of the 80's. When I was taught this story it set off so many warning bells for me that it broke the concept that god was all good.

@georgelyddane8283 4 месяца назад

literally same story here except i’m 18 and this happened very recently. I’m honestly just disappointed. I put so much hope in this god, devoted so much for him for such a long time, I was genuinely happy, but it just doesn’t make any sense. Reality is often dissapointing

@ThomasShark455 3 дня назад

@@georgelyddane8283What doesn’t make sense?

@ThomasShark455 3 дня назад

What is do you think all good is?? Genuine questions. What would you say is the perfect kind of King. What do you think a King should do if subjects of his nation plotted a coup or go against a serious command of the king.

@DuncanUdaho67 5 лет назад

“How Beyoncé inspired a whole generation and then PLANNED 9/11!” This is the best channel I’ve ever seen holy shit.

@Neurozumim 7 лет назад

Great quote: "Jeffrey, being God by defintion means that whatever I do can't be called evil"

@CorePathway 7 месяцев назад

“Being president means everything I do is legal” - D.T.

@S.D.323 7 месяцев назад

a real I am the senate moment

@DarkMatter2525 7 лет назад

This is the start of King David’s story, and his story has a lot of iconic moments from the bible, so I figured it would be good to give it the DarkMatter treatment. It could never be covered in one cartoon, so it has to be a miniseries. This fifteen minute animation only covers a few chapters, and I have around forty more to go, but I’m sure they won’t all need equal attention. I wouldn’t have even thought of doing it this thoroughly - as it’s a lot of work - if I wasn’t receiving the support I am from my patrons. So, thank you. You’ve really made projects like this possible. Also, I really appreciate those of you who have helped spread my work and engaged via sharing, commenting, etc, which helps me on RU-vid.

@iChopYouDrop 7 лет назад

DarkMatter2525 ily

@mraj8372 7 лет назад

Awesome, Trumps Inauguration had a LOT of religious rhetoric in it. You should do a video on that.

@terminator900000 7 лет назад

I see 15 min video i click like

@danielessex2162 7 лет назад

DarkMatter2525 dude love your work.

@FieryCharmander737 7 лет назад

Have you made a video on the end times yet?

@The.Youtuber.with.no.Name. 7 лет назад

*''Pepe the frog is a perfect advocate for the LGBTQ community because the water turned the frogs gay''* Fucking genius.

@Spiderific 6 лет назад

ִ lol that was my favorite part

@-kxvin-5239 7 лет назад

That "im god" thing is just as funny as when batman says "because im batman" in hishe 😂😂😂

@NivekTheEnigma 3 года назад

Batman>God

@bloodknightazodrac9224 3 года назад

@@NivekTheEnigma He just needs preptime XD

@eatenbyjezebel5604 3 года назад

Bloodknight Azodrac he can do anything with enough Wayne bucks

@jirivrana9562 2 года назад

Actually god is more funny than Batman

@grungefreak10 7 лет назад

So far, the biblical figures have been Arnold, Jeff Goldblum, Morgan Freeman, Sam Jackson, Joe Pesci, Sylvester Stallone and now Dolph Lundren as Goliath. Keep them coming, it's hilarious!

@thebloocat 5 лет назад

He should've used Beckham

@vanessadotson8067 4 года назад

IS HELL HILARIOUS ?

@rhaenyralikesyoutube6289 4 года назад

There are quite a bit of contradictions in all of these Bible stories, but the "actor," choices are hilarious.

@vanessadotson8067 4 года назад

@Google is God You are to

@bcbc8649 2 года назад

@@vanessadotson8067 yes hell sounds hilarious

@CRebel-by9fb 7 лет назад

"The women" "Ummm 77 percent dead" lol.

@tijanajakovljevic6319 6 лет назад

JUST realised ahhahahaha

@jkm7983 6 лет назад

I don't get it

@aceandreimirandilla5391 6 лет назад

Why 77%? I dont get it either.

@mchevre 6 лет назад

Because women make 77 cents for every dollar men make.

@johnnygreenface4195 6 лет назад

MrGoat "earn" "over sever years"

@Incred_Canemian 7 лет назад

InfoFeed BuzzWar is the most horrifying thing I've ever seen.

@akashicshaka 6 лет назад

ikr

@ignisspiritustenebris7137 5 лет назад

"Interdimensional transexual issues are serious" -infofeed buzzwar

@BlazingOwnager 5 лет назад

I lost it at InfoFeed BuzzWar. Both extremes in one horrible (in a good way ) character, lol

@Dracopyre321 5 месяцев назад

“Top 10 Reasons Why Joe Biden and Donald Trump Should Be In A Remake Of Brokeback Mountain” -InfoFeed BuzzWar

@nabils9837 4 года назад

"In the name of the Laawwwd" 😂😂 gets me every time

@tracysimon7972 8 месяцев назад

I thought Quentin Tarantino made this video for a second lol

@jaghond2 7 лет назад

that buzzfeed-infowar abomination put the fear of God back in my soul

@Talon323 7 лет назад

this is by far the best interpitacion of the bible ever

@itsaboutthattime4425 7 лет назад

sakmi kuhl the best what???

@jamesburkestephenking9333 7 лет назад

Roadman Onjob must be Spanish, right?

@adolfodef 7 лет назад

Spanish: "interpretacion" English: "interpretation"

@justincale119 7 лет назад

sakmi kuhl interretardation

@billschlafly4107 7 лет назад

Put an "O" at the end and you get the Spanish equivalent-o.

@Anonymous551656 7 лет назад

"There's a lot of snakes on this plain." I lol'd

@emaginationproductions 6 лет назад

I JUST got that 😂😂😂

@lynnevega1976 6 лет назад

I didn't get that please help

@garrettwade1294 5 лет назад

Regret Incarnate Snakes on a plane in a movie.

@BlazingOwnager 4 года назад

God Better Call Saul.

@maxuno8524 2 года назад

😂🤣 I had to pause, while I died from laughter 🤣😂

@mh4zd 6 лет назад

"Late, late term abortion..." Master stroke.

@proculusjulius7035 3 года назад

@KKKn50cal yeah and repubs are really pro life ..

@jimmyglea 3 года назад

I could have used this channel in the 70’s and 80’s. I was born into the fundamentalist Christian cult, went to church 3 times a week, and attended a “school” attached to the church. I always knew something was off about my “education”. It wasn’t until I began to deprogram myself as an adult that I realized how much damage had been done.

@snitcheyes411 7 лет назад

"There's a lot of snakes on this plane." I'm holding you responsible for the soda on my computer monitor now, lol.

@hjorturerlend 7 лет назад

Plain* ;)

@maddyg2320 5 лет назад

@@hjorturerlend .. No, plane is correct 🤦

@stewartgoodwin9488 4 года назад

Oh.. I get it now. Im like "thats not in the bible"

@maxuno8524 2 года назад

😂🤣😂 I died

@steveswangler6373 2 года назад

@@maddyg2320 no it's not. the reference was to the movie, but the reference was made on a plain, not a plane.

@MrJay_White 7 лет назад

got a 2hour & 5 minute advert from free presbi church on this video. flawless algorithm.

@rahowherox1177 7 лет назад

Mr Jay White a profitable algorithm. many christians watch these vids, feel threatened by logic and compensate by being extra christian and seek extra indoctrination.

@AnEvolvingApe 7 лет назад

r X, LOL! I never knew someone can be extra Christian-y?

@nevadahiker6661 7 лет назад

Me too, was checking the comments to see if it happened to anybody else!

@Chaosherold 7 лет назад

I got an ad for a hebrew bible or something like it.

@thetruthrover 7 лет назад

Lol did you watch it?

@mug9591 7 лет назад

Samuel L Jackson and Joe Pesci. Great combo. Samuel: The Lawd!

@rjonboy7608 6 лет назад

Next installment: "Yo, Bathsheeba! Howya doin?"

@theweirdestsmartchannel1842 5 лет назад

And rocky david

@justsam7919 5 лет назад

In the name of the L A W D!!!

@apollyon_616 2 года назад

a sith LAWD?

@mrpeanutbutter9882 7 лет назад

Ok, I watched this video and compared it side by side with that chapter of the bible and it is the same, the bible is so absurd lol

@nocturnalrecluse1216 6 лет назад

As is any.

@dirtywash4890 5 лет назад

I feel like the church either skimmed over this part...or really made it seem like SAUL fucked up.

@ShokoFlow 5 лет назад

watch his genesis 38 one

@doggoslayer5679 5 лет назад

No you didnt

@imvandenh 5 лет назад

@@doggoslayer5679 As Vincent Vega himself would say, that's a bold statement. You must be omnipresent and omniscient like Yahweh, and therefore know all things including what that faceless unknown internet person did or did not do. So tell me, since you know so much, what color socks am I wearing? Fucking kids. When will you brats learn to keep your fucking mouths shut when the grown-ups are talking? So you doubt the guy actually watched the video and compared it to the Bible. Is that really so fucking hard to believe, dipshit? I did the same goddamn thing the first time I saw this video when it was new. Now a couple years later I come back to watch it again and I see someone else did what I did or they said they did anyway. And you don't want to believe it. Well thanks for sharing. Go back to your fucking corner.

@efe_aydal 7 лет назад

Thanks for going back to Bible stories.

@kreynus5137 6 лет назад

Efe Aydal abi sende burdamiydin ya

@huseyinkalkan3642 5 лет назад

Abi napıyon burda

@Lovelylondly 5 лет назад

Efe abi de buradaymış be.

@maddyg2320 5 лет назад

Efe Aydal.... You have beautiful eyes! Too bad you don't make vids in English 🤷

@refulge9075 3 года назад

aa efe aybi

@MrBDF2000 7 лет назад

This was amazing on so many levels, the demon, the sips of soda, the weaponized harp....next level writing

@andybee1381 7 лет назад

"Samuel, bring a cow with you and tell them you're going to Bethlehem to sacrifice it. That'll be your cover." Wow. Good thing Saul left a couple of cows alive then!

@stewartgoodwin9488 4 года назад

They had cows already.

@mamc1986 5 лет назад

I say do more of the following (I am throwing ideas out there): -The story of Jezebel -Danial and the Lions -Issac and Abraham -Cain and Able -A special cameo by...Moloch the Canaanite demon! -Stories that were ban from the Bible such as "the Story of Lilith", the story of baby Jesus slaying dragons. And let them be Jeffery and God episodes. These episodes are hilarious! LOL

@ampleoloruntogbe1434 4 года назад

mamc1986 you forgot to add the atory of Ruth

@rodprops 4 года назад

Daniel* Abel* banned*

@TSPOWELL89 2 года назад

The story of Jonah

@jirivrana9562 2 года назад

Yeah true

@davidvelasco4423 Год назад

Isaac and Abraham was adapted as the video game "The Binding of Isaac," which was created when someone asserted "The Rogue [Isaac] was in the Bible. You just didn't look hard enough."

@spencerboock8554 7 лет назад

Making Samuel Samuel L Jackson is the best decision anyone has ever made

@CorePathway 7 месяцев назад

Hebrew, mothafukka, does thou speak it? 💀

@_the__christianing_2350 7 лет назад

6:08 the cow, god, and the sheep drinking from Samuel L. Jacksons straw, had me in pain. 😂😂😂😂🤣🤣

@deanna1410 5 лет назад

You know what turning bible stories into REALISTIC cartoons rather than cute kiddie shows is exactly what this world needs. EXACTLY what it needs!!

@speedygonzalez885 7 лет назад

that buzzfeed/infowars joke was top tier 10/10 would

@christiaanstephan4387 5 лет назад

You could say that joke was god tier

@comradepolarbear6920 4 года назад

Which one

@yodie_yodarf8860 7 лет назад

*Sees Darkmatter2525 released a new video* : Moans

@henryolsen6248 7 лет назад

*Screams in excitement*

@TheBigAEC 7 лет назад

I jizz in my pants.

@UDumFck 7 лет назад

Loren, you must be a lonely one because the thumbs up/down certainly does not agree with you.

@ProfessorBorax 7 лет назад

unclic the bell ;)

@aceofsalts0246 7 лет назад

*dramatically* "It's time"

@ganjiblobflankis6581 7 лет назад

Holy crap, there is a two-hour (!!!) advert for a church in front of this video.

@15Redstones 7 лет назад

@maddiep6430 7 лет назад

Ganjiblob Flankis Good thing we have the skip button

@carterblunt4192 7 лет назад

I actually don't have a skip button anymore, dunno why... I just refresh after about 6 seconds, usually it skips the ad... don't know if my PC Matic ad blocker is part of that. Sometimes it just gives me another ad, so I keep refreshing until I get one that's 20 seconds or less.

@sakurakitsunestar 7 лет назад

that is both horrible and funny

@angryhairpeice 7 лет назад

Ganjiblob Flankis It is a debate. I'm watching the whole thing, it is actually a good watch. Besides, doesn't DM get paid by the minute?

@GlassTopV.1 7 лет назад

These videos are making me rethink being agnostic and becoming full blown atheist...

@Neurozumim 7 лет назад

Your agnostism doesn't need imply the ABRAHAMIC CANON.

@alexandrorocca7142 7 лет назад

Join the club brother. I don't agree with Dawkins or deGrasse Tyson on that. I'm not "almost" confident that there isn't a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow, I'm 100% sure of it, so why should I give more credit to any fairy tale, including deities? The number of believers doesn't make any claim more legit, in fact all the different beliefs prove the opposite.

@unicyclist97 7 лет назад

Agnostic and atheist are completely independent. Gnostic Atheist: I know there are no gods (not many of these exist). Agnostic Atheist: I don't know whether there are gods but there's no good reason to believe in any of them. (Most people who identify as agnostic are also atheist) Agnostic Theist: I don't know whether any gods exist for sure but I'll believe in one anyway (Probably for cultural reasons). Gnostic Theist: There is definitely a god! (Indoctrinated Presuppositionalist)

@icommitedwarcrimes4879 6 лет назад

Virtuoso Joel "Indoctrinated". Shut the fuck up already. U don't know other people's life

@icommitedwarcrimes4879 6 лет назад

David J some, maybe, but I can choose, me personaly. I saw the power of the Lord everywere, and many other feelings, because I simply let the Holy Spirit in me. + The fact that David was actually the king of Israel. No one can deny that.

@thethinkingbeing9817 4 года назад

It’s weird how people say, “it’s only right if god actually said that” And yet they have *zero* proof that god did or didn’t say that.

@TheUndefeatedSeason 7 лет назад

" I come in the name of The LORRRD!!!! " XD

@josephdillard9907 7 лет назад

i wish like hell RU-vid would stop letting people put religious ads in front of atheist videos like this...frankly it's insulting

@rahowherox1177 7 лет назад

Joseph Dillard frankly, it is profitable. Most christians know the absurdity of their beliefs when examined in any detail and challenge their delusions by watching "truth". rather than cure them, it can serve desire for confirmation of their delusion and compensation by being extra christian. and the ads make use of this.

@vladimirsukmeovf1211 7 лет назад

havent you heard of ad blocker?

@angryhairpeice 7 лет назад

Joseph Dillard Those are the ones I don't skip. Don't they pay by how much was watched?

@Dalthos2 7 лет назад

If you don't like the content of the ad, just disregard it.

@josephdillard9907 7 лет назад

I don't like ad blocker cause I like to support the channels I'm subscribed to, and I know there is probably no way to control what ad is put where but it's just annoying If atheists started putting ads for free and critical thinking and non superstitious reason and logic all over the place there would no doubt be an uproar because of it

@FigureUnboxing 3 года назад

I remember this story from the Christian religion class in my school when I was in 10th class. My teacher explained it. She said the massacre was perfectly JUSTIFIED because the enemies were PURE EVIL. They did NOT deserve to live. Killing women and children was also justified, to avoid future revenge. She even praised god for being so intelligent to think of all future possibilities. Even back when I was younger, I disagreed with my teacher but what could I do? I didn't want to fail my religion class -,-' In my country, religion is one of mandatory lessons in classes where you surely do not wish to fail (the others are morality lesson and native languge lesson).

@samuelschar9081 Год назад

cruel

@christianbergmann8114 Год назад

I hope morality lessons were teached by another teacher. That's crazy.

@oscarrimore 7 лет назад

LOL I just realized that you cast Samuel L. Jackson as Samuel hahahaha genius move

@christianvennemann9008 7 лет назад

Am I the only one who got the "77% dead" joke about the women? If you didn't get it, it's a joke about the gender pay gap. That whole string of puns and inside jokes killed me! XD

@azraki9794 6 лет назад

Ohh i get it because its over exaggerated and doesent exist lol good one

@ryanfiocca 6 лет назад

Is it a wage gap joke? Or a keep the virgins joke?

@misael8973 5 лет назад

I got it

@stevebennion8601 5 лет назад

@@azraki9794 We already know dude I'm pretty sure that's the point of the joke. Anyone who does believe in that crap would fit right in with the buzzfeed crowd.

@saladcaesar7716 4 года назад

Christian Vennemann I thought it was because of the virgin females they had to spare

@CassesVultus 7 лет назад

"I'm sick of all these mother fucking snakes on this mother fucking plain" -- 1 Samuel 16:13

@TRIGAROLA 7 лет назад

CassesVultus It's not "Hey, Zeus!". Third DieHard, 7:46

@sassylittleprophet 3 года назад

Can you do one with David and Jonathan as lovers? The Bible literally says "their souls were knit together," and in the song David wrote to lament Jonathan after his death in battle, David said "Your love to me was wonderful, surpassing the love of women." Like...seriously. If it was talking about a man and a woman, we'd all automatically assume they were in love, but because they were both men, it was just an amazing "friendship"?

@bennywolfe4357 2 года назад

Yes. An amazing friendship. You’d be delusional to think differently.

@sixkicksfightertricks949 Год назад

What version of the Bible said that? The NIV version I read depicted them as best friends but I don't remember any phrasing like that.

@sassylittleprophet Год назад

@@sixkicksfightertricks949 KJV

@firesteelbushcraft Год назад

“There’s a lot of snakes on this plain” 🤣🤣🤣

@lisaboban 7 лет назад

"False flag attacks are a construct of white male privelege." That's the best thing I've ever heard on the internet! Ever.

@itsaboutthattime4425 7 лет назад

Made Samuel Samuel L Jackson. I'm dead 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

@whipmyfro 7 лет назад

Roadman Onjob OMG. I'm so slow today. I just noticed that 😄😄

@halfdemonprince 7 лет назад

Remember when they made Arnold Schwarzenegger Samson

@mrpeanutbutter9882 7 лет назад

N.A. B. me too lol

@ravinderkaur6664 7 лет назад

Jasmine Donald why the hell is hell..

@ultimatereviewer01 7 лет назад

Roadman Onjob me too😂😂😂

@astrizettep2597 4 года назад

“I’m sure killing in my name will never be a problem” Jeffrey’s dramatical cough had me in the floor XD

@fitnessmentoringwithdaniel6006 Год назад

I would really love videos on Mormonism please! 😄🙏🏻 My wife and I left Mormonism about 3 years ago now, and we still have so much bitterness and anger towards the church.

@TippyTappy98 Год назад

Deedum dee da dum; Joseph Smith was called a prophet dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb.

@jaysonraphaelmurdock8812 8 месяцев назад

That would be hilarious

@Will-I-Maybe 7 лет назад

I came in the name of the LOOOOOOOOOORRRDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@moerko94 7 лет назад

"Because the water turned the frogs gay" XD

@hotshotjcb3798 6 лет назад

"And an evil spirit from The Lord! tempted him". Strange how in the old testament "the Satan" and evil spirits are sent from God. This tune changes in the new testament like many other things. Very entertaining presentation, keep up the good work DarkMatter2525!

@vadimdopop4061 5 лет назад

I never stopped to think how cruel and stupid this story is. It's ok to slaughter all people, including children and infants, but it's a terrible crime in the eyes of God to spare some of the animals. What a twisted character this old testament God is!

@chrissonofpear1384 5 лет назад

Ah, yes, the problem of staying on brand... with confused priorities!

@axeheadgaming5872 7 лет назад

lol the unholy alliance of BuzzFeed and infowars

@probablywrongnews8915 7 лет назад

Great work. I watched this instead of going to church

@alexandervoronin7078 Год назад

If this is the "moral compass" offered then I prefer having my own.

@alicebrobbey1124 7 лет назад

THIS is why I don't care how long it takes to get another video from you. Pure genius

@ThatOneStuff 7 лет назад

That cow taking a sip of the drink was adorable!

@josephmellor7641 7 лет назад

This is the earliest I've ever been to any video. If you see this, thanks for all the great videos over the years.

@monkeypuncher7242 7 лет назад

Joseph Mellor Same

@josephmellor7641 7 лет назад

Randall Flagg It's a screen cap of some RU-vid video.

@ravinderkaur6664 7 лет назад

Duck Soup perhaps it is for the unwanted..

@AnaseSkyrider 7 лет назад

Since I'm one of those "Always been an atheist" people, who's never read the bible, watching videos like this is a real treat because it means I get to look at the absurdity from a non-indoctrinated point of view.

@AnaseSkyrider 3 года назад

@KGB - Komitet Gosudarstvennoy Bezopasnosti I have a little bit of that experience myself since when I was really young, I spent a few years getting into New Age woo. Kinda funny how I used to buy into shit like "crystals have feelings and they like to explore, take walks with your crystals so that the universe doesn't influence them to fall out of your pocket".

@Slizzard73 2 месяца назад

The animals drinking from the straw literally killed me 😂

@supatwisted5473 7 лет назад

The soda cup and the reference to snakes on a plane. check plus

@johnnygreenface4195 7 лет назад

I didn't get that. XD there are a lot of snakes in this plane

@Majik53 7 лет назад

Weren't they standing on a plain - a flat piece of land?

@david2869 7 лет назад

Yes, huge ... tracts of land.

@LeadGenWithDarryl 7 лет назад

I'm like a kid racing down the stairs to watch his favorite cartoon

@Schrodinger_ 7 лет назад

After the second Pulp Fiction reference I just knew in my bones that there would be a joke about Snakes on a Plane.

@ShobeirSheida 3 года назад

12:15 almost got suffocated from laughing ...

@mankind-redefined1982 7 лет назад

12:48-13:04 I haven't laughed that hard in a while 😂

@Coalemos 7 лет назад

It was pure genius. I had barely heard of Buzz Feed before, I didn't know what it was all about and I got everything I need for that.

@gstizzy3558 7 лет назад

the book of Ezekiel absolutely needs to be addressed through your interpretation. There must have been much acid being dropped then

@S.D.323 7 месяцев назад

I particularly like the part where God lets ezekiel make food with bull shit instead of human shit

@evanblue179 7 лет назад

These videos honestly changed my life... I've always had question but I was always taught not to question God... Then I found the videos and they opened my eyes to a while new way of thinking... I guess I'm a "Born Again Atheist"

@HappyPsychoBunny1 2 года назад

"Jefferey, I am sure that killing in the name of god will never be a problem". - I literally laughed out loud.

@morbidsearch 7 лет назад

Only 3 weeks to wait for a new DarkMatter video? Miracles do exist!!

@PaleGhost69 7 лет назад

DarkMatter2525 is awesome and is an epic content creator.

@nickguh1323 3 года назад

I can't believe I'm named after a guy who chops someone into pieces and orders the death of infants.

@thatyoutubechannel9953 7 лет назад

The Pepe joke from BuzzWars was amazing.

@topmiacaremid7583 7 лет назад

This guy earns his Patreon

@bishop1412 7 лет назад

77% of the death, but 200 % of the mourning

@Desertphile 7 лет назад

Still the best RU-vid channel. Andf I wish this was tauight in all Bible schools.

@bobbruce4135 7 лет назад

Great for teaching children elements of schizophrenia and why humans have greater levels than other animals for our primitive socialization mechanisms that accepts the indoctrination we are raised in.

@DarkFire0421 2 года назад

It's amazing how relivent this still is in 2022

@justafishoutofwater 4 месяца назад

Relavant*

@prabhnoor_ 7 лет назад

Oh man, Pulp Fiction and Goodfellas. I'm 6 mins in and loving it soo much. great great script

@jamessabins887 7 лет назад

the BuzzFeed Infowars baby had me rolling on the floor

@christopher8363 7 лет назад

The Pepe the frog line was by far the best one liner I have heard in a long time. Thanks for the laugh!

@C_Corpze Год назад

The humor and jokes involved while telling these bible stories is priceless.

@demaloe 7 лет назад

No other channel excites me as much as yours. The best thing about your videos is that the quality becomes better and better after every video. P.S the use of Bach's piece in the background was super cool!!!!!

@lordboogus1145 7 лет назад

Does that soda ever run out?

@fandomguy8025 6 лет назад

God gave Samuel the gift of bottomless soda as thanks to his praise.

@godtoons5349 7 лет назад

"in the name of the lawd!" that part got me every time

@ExplanationNext 7 лет назад

This is one of the funniest Darkmatter videos I've ever seen! Prophet Samuel. lol.

@wafflezyum 7 лет назад

That demon is going to be in my nightmares for the next month

@garchompelago 7 лет назад

I cant wait to see David's 360noscoping skillz

@KenSamaGomenasai 7 лет назад

yeah, the buzzfeed infowars beast? Your most hilarious work yet. I actually laughed so hard I popped a blood vessel in my eye.

@OFFONE 2 года назад

When I was a Christian I never understood gods logic for this story Saul did absolutely nothing wrong is massacred the children and kept the animals to kill for later and he was not given a time limit or a place to kill them aswell which makes no sense. Either way I’m glad to have left that cult

@AntiCitizenX 7 лет назад

... hey, why is there a stereotypical 70s black dude in there? His name is Samuel? Samuel... Samuel? OHHHHH. I get it. :)

@duvipearson6251 7 лет назад

lmao

@phredbug_9660 6 лет назад

AntiCitizenX Samuel being portrayed by Samuel Jackson is a pulp fiction spoof/reference

@potatosmasher1072 6 лет назад

You know that's Samuel L Jackson right

@germanvisitor2 6 лет назад

There a a lot of snakes on this plane.

@EdMcCornhole 4 года назад

Dolemite Rudy Ray Moore

@SLiPCoR 7 лет назад

Oh boy I almost died when the cow took a sip xD I love those videos xD keep it up!

@josephbishara4791 5 лет назад

I've got no idea why God would want to kill infants. It sounds unreal, but it's all in the Bible - Samuel 15:3 *"go and smite Amalek, and utterly destroy all that they have, and spare them not; but slay both man and woman, infant and suckling"*

@bmyers8356 5 лет назад

Joseph Bishara : It was an era of blood feuds. Kids would grow up & avenge parents’ murder. (God became convenient excuse).

@Illuminatiman44 7 лет назад

the thing with me is that I believe in god completely but this series is just making me dislike the Bible in general

@gageblackwood8832 7 лет назад

+TheOblivionisdoom: You've taken the first step on the road to freedom (atheism) by recognizing how bad the bible is. Now ask yourself why you would believe in an idea "completely" for which there is absolutely no evidence.

@stormwatcher59 6 лет назад

You don't need religion (Christianity or otherwise) to believe in "god".

@mikemillward1070 6 лет назад

There are allegedly freer forms of belief emerging, but they often seem chaotic or contradictory. This Neale Donald Walsch guy is sort of interesting - at times.

@reginaayat5390 6 лет назад

Educating yourself will set you free from the painful chains of religion..

@mandarinablue8438 4 года назад

So you're a deist. Nice.

@typhoonic 7 лет назад

Am I the only one who found the evil spirit character legit disturbing as fuck?

@JamarD421 7 лет назад

Gakuto Yes

@freshpressedify 7 лет назад

@finnmurtonz7062 7 лет назад

gakuto, do you know when the second season will come out? by the way, best boy!!!

@typhoonic 7 лет назад

2nd season of Prison School? Yours truly has no idea.

@XEZ616 7 лет назад

That evil spirit was scary, indeed.

@jebus6kryst 7 лет назад

I would think the offspring of Buzzfeed and InfoWars would be Brietbart.

@luigiman8728 7 лет назад

he_who_is_nobody you insult the mighty Milo? OK, have fun with the hate comments.

@jebus6kryst 7 лет назад

Luigi man87 Milo? Who is that?

@_the__christianing_2350 7 лет назад

he_who_is_nobody No, it would be Anita sarkesian.

@90hijacked 7 лет назад

neither anita nor milo have anything to do with infowars what so ever, others tho, have dubbed the offsprings Cenk Uygur ;-)

@_the__christianing_2350 7 лет назад

90hijacked I know... I just wanted to blow off some steam. It feels good to relate Anita to something as fucking awful as buzz feed. ... that... fucking... bitch...