It feels like whenever Train asks _"does this make any sense?"_ this is his experience as coming off too aggressive reminding him to open up to criticism, backpedal a little and inject kind of an acknowledgement _"hey look this is my interpretation and I am hereby declaring this as possibly not correct so please don'T feel intimidated into just agreeing with me but challenge me as an equal."_ It's almost as if he felt guilty for putting out his opinions and conclusions.
True but also when you’re chat spams “????” at a lot of your theories and ideas you tend to try to check yourself and he does it via 3rd party in a lot of scenarios Your theory is plausible though and at least partly true
He mentions it in the last talk he had, that he learned that just making his point led to people feeling intimidated, so he adds "does that make sense" at the end of sentences. It makes sense, he cares a lot about how he's perceived.
Canadian standoff :D That reminds of Korean StarCraft players' pre-game commentary, "oh it's such a big honor to face off against , it's going to be a tough match, I feel a little bit nervous, [...]", i.e. Asian Trash Talking.
The way Train communicates reminds me a lot of myself, both in my work life and in therapy... introspective, and has a LOT to dump when he talks, but it devolves into rambling. How does one go about improving the way they communicate if they notice themselves behaving like this?
My take, perhaps it may help you, otherwise consider it just a dude's rambling: You lack specificity, formalism and structure, the same thing that powers lawyers and mathematicians. Acquiring those those things begins with two threads: 1. pinpointing ideas and 2.structuring them into a web. 1. Lack of specificity and formalism manifests as having a very vivid feeling/idea possibly quite complex in your head, but when you try to communicate it, the words you find don't do it justice, they feel like crude approximations at best. In this case you need to work on your map from feelings/ideas into words. You might already know the correct words but they are not associated with that idea, in which case you need to explore the space of ideas with words. This happens in the form of asking a lot of specific, answerable questions, it's really important that they are easy enough to answer while making any kind of progress, however small it may be, towards contouring that idea; think of questions like: in what domain can I place this idea? what is the closest word I can use to describe it? what is its polar opposite? is [random word] related to it? if not, what is one that's slightly better? one better?... oh look that one's actually close, but what is missing? can you find more examples where this idea applies? do those point you towards a better word? How does this differ from that? are there other this that differ in different ways and yet related? The second part of this is the reverse: searching the space of words with feelings grab a book, a dictionary, a wikipedia article, word map and read something about the closest domain you can think of , again you should make incremental progress however small and finding better and better words. Remeber that along your learning you will find things you didn't know which are unrelated to your current question, make a mental node that they exist and know where to search them, because at some point in the future you might stumble upon them. 2. Lack of structure manifests as having the right ideas/words pinpointed, but when you try to communicate them a jumbled mess comes out even though you use right words and talk a bout the right things, it might feel like a mysterious reason that you can't quite understand how they seem to get jumbled up and get more chaotic/complicated when you talk a bout them. First of all, ideas are not this smooth thread which if you pull they all come into the right order, the real thread has many bifurcations and even loops around itself, if you are not conscious of them you will always take the easy bifurcations. So step 1, find the bifurcations in you ideas: you can't do that without a map, to make a map you need landmarks, landmarks are the main points, you will find that landmarks have a specific structure to them: some are connected via one way streets to one another, it would be very silly to visit one before the other, whereas other landmarks seem to be unrelated to most others, try to group them and find the shortest distance between them, ask yourself do I really need to include this idea to make my point? Be aware of localities, they are what tie the conversation toghether and give it a nice flow, you may want not to deviate from the path to a really juicy tangent even though it seems really tempting, in order to keep importants ideas close toghether. You will have to choose what to say now vs later vs none at all, choose wisely. Which brings me to my next point: compress and imply. If you feel like it takes 20 minutes to say a 5 min idea even though you're not taking breaks and feel like sticking to the point, you need to recheck you landmarks. You can feel you have too many, the listener feels you have too man, so cut them down, ask yourself does this point really further the conversation? does it align to my goal of what I want to communicate? If yes and still have to many, imply some of them, choose your words carefully and you might find that people are pretty smart, they make assumptions any way, so why not abuse them? use colorful words and vivid scenarios to imply some of the things related instead of actually saying them, also abuse generally obvious one-way streets, since you're at this landmark and everyone know that you have to take that one way street from the other land you've just hit two birds with one stone. Really curious if any of this sticks with you or it's too abstract, let me know, good luck!
Anxiety bulding up, reading ones emotions as an empath too heavily then becoming more anxious because their smile and attention span is fading, so you have to finish your ramble up in a manner that makes sense but that itself is difficult to think up so fast Yeah, it's hard
There we fucking go. Finally a mental health expert that admits "Some people use mental health as an excuse for being assholes." Its good to hear honesty like this from a legit dr.
“Dr K are you the impostor?” “You know I’m happy to answer that question but firstly I’m curious, what is it that made you ask that question originally and when was the first time in your life you felt that way?”
For a man who speaks for a living, he has a real hard time formulating his thoughts. Seems like a nice guy, but I think Dr K is right that he needs to worry less about how to say something the right way and just say it
I think the only reason why he's gotta tip toe around what he's actually saying is due to the fact that he's quoted out of context in online media quite abit, it's a shame but he's gotta work around things like this being a big twitch streamer.
@@AntiPersonnelRescueAxe he says dumb shit in context. big streamers dont usually tip toe like train does cuz train has a reputation for saying bad stuff.
Train mentioning early in that he is super paranoid and giving the example of him patting people down probably was insightful to where the meandering slow burning story telling non-answering comes from, he's deeply distrustful of others, and even distrustful of himself to say the 'right' thing.
Yeah. He seems distrustful of the world in general. Because let’s face it: as a public figure if he says something that goes past “the line” he could lose it all. It makes sense that he’s extremely careful then, as are a lot of other streamers. Hes just really bad at doing it lowkey
I appreciate train coming on again so much! Many people seem to bash him for going on tangents and not being precise, but I myself know how it feels when you're not able to share your thoughts just like that, so I appreciate that he at least tries to.
@@H4NDBANANUH It's not a habit. I have similar problems. Not that deep and not always, but it sometimes happens. I cannot control it. It's like all information that crosses my mind intervenes with the point i'm trying to make
@@dosko9980 So i said i think because i'm not for certain if he might just have add, if he's having trouble being concise, he could learn some methods to make it easier for himself. Granted it would be more difficult for him but i think it would probably put him on the right path so we can have a easier time understanding what he says.
@@cx3622 Decades of being treated as a freak leading her to becoming a complete shut-in for years, all while not being able to control her actions and words or understand why she was the way she was (she wasn't diagnosed with tourrettes until her mid-20's), many scary and terrible things happening to her perpetrated by some of the few people she trusted, having to be the carer for her sick mother from a very young age, to ... pulling herself forward through a love and devotion to helping animals, ... and now struggling with being a person who values herself so low on this cosmic scale that she can't buy herself things and can hardly make time to put up a picture she was given,... I think Dr.K was even pretty floored at points, partly because of the contrast between how incredibly well formed her big thoughts are on why we are here and how to treat others with great care vs. how fucked her life has been and how little she cares for herself. I took it as inspirational that she was dealt this ultra-shitty hand of cards and has still found a way to be this kind and mind-full person.
I think trains sessions are the most helpful for me. I felt very similarly throughout childhood, middle school, and drug use(minus addiction, heroin and meth). Once I start talking about deep things about myself, I ramble HARD and almost can't stop the "train".
Every thought has to go through a multi-layered filter and cross check before you say it to protect the stupid and weak willed, but sometimes the thing you need to say gets caught in the filter and never comes out.
I think I understand most of where Train is coming from, despite him not being able to articulate the context because I've been through what he went through. Firstly what he says about perception is true, people will treat you based on what you look like or what impression you give them, because Train looks like how he does, the other guys feel their masculinity being threatened and need to knock him down. He learned to lean into that and do what needs to be done to have them back off and he hates that these 'bad' thoughts and behaviours have essentially become a part of his history/personality and this conflicts with what was taught to him by his parents, being nice and moral is what he knows and what makes him happy but through life experiences out of his control, part of him has become opposite of that and he feels guilty for it. I think the reason why he keeps asking "Does that make sense?" is because he is the only one feeling that way, he had no validation of his thoughts so he always doubts what he says as the majority were always against him. When the majority think you're an intimidating asshole and you're the only one who thinks differently, it makes you doubt your truth, sense of reality and self esteem, and I think that's why it's so hard for him to just come out with what he has to say, he's still judging and censoring himself to not be judged badly with what he has to say. Finally the last part which must have been completely nonsensical with no context, is about the truth based on perception. A person who looks trustworthy and approachable but with the opposite personality will be able to abuse that perception of them and control the truth, politicians are the best example of this. In his case, the other people who looked non intimidating were able to control the truth of what Train was, this led to him being bullied, it led to him having bad experiences and developing defensive behaviour, because of false perception, other people were able to control the path his life went, they destroyed his innocence and what he was originally. This is what he meant about the bad people and corruption, bullies who don't look like bullies can corrupt your life and get away with it, because nobody knows the truth beyond what they can see.
I have no idea why this has no likes, and I’m personally a fan of more people in the comments offering up their own psychoanalysis of these sessions, but so much about what you’ve theorized or merely suggested as possibly right on the money, in my opinion is indeed right on the money.
I adore this man... Such an intellect and purity. Train has insane deepness in his mind, attitude, view of life and people, genuine reality, politeness, maybe he is not good at words all the time but I swear it feels like he is hand picking what he's going to say and when. Even tho with all his flaws and 'illnesses' he is definitely someone who many people can admire if they 'scratch the surface' -- definitely what he mentioned about the general look and feel "don't judge a book by it's cover" deal. I love listening to him, it's therapeutic for brain and soul! What a great dude :)
Hope Train gets help......I would not go near that Pandora's box. Good luck Doc 😂 The look on Docs face when Train said "Id love to get into the juicy stuff next time"......priceless😂
This is the furst time ive met trainwreck. He seems such a lovely guy. Im aussie so thank you fir the wildfires help so much appreciated to everyone. I do watch him on Among us though too. But what i got out of this was wierd I got that i hate getting pressents on my birthday. In fact i dont like my birthdays. I like other peoples but not mine. Because my birthday is 3 days before christmas. And you see the stress on peoples faces when its mentioned - not so much now but when i was a kid. I used to not want to make christmas harder or more costly fir anyone, so even today i just keep quiet about it. Mind you, these days thats fine. Dont remind me im getting older lol lets just do christmas - much more fun. But i dont think im the only one. I think people who were borrn close to christmas / new year might feel the same way hey?
So much rambling going on from Train. It was difficult to follow him. The core of this session was about how he feels unworthy. More needs to be explored.
its like he doesnt get to the point. He thinks he is skipping the story to get to the point but the point he gets to makes no sense. Goes in circles and tangents, instead of going from a to z. No focus.
I’ve found that a sometimes you get a lot more substance from the dr. If you apply some tactful brevity to your explanations. Context isn’t required to be fully explained especially when one context leads to another context immediately. Does that make any sense?
I don't agree with people in these comments who say he has difficulty formulating his thoughts. True, he sometimes takes a while to get to his point, but that's because he values understanding so much, which I think is admirable. It's also why he asks "does that make sense?" so often. I find him actually very precise, while managing to stay nuanced, and for me it's a joy to listen to. He's my favourite guest. The part at 36:30 was great and very well put by Train, and it gets an equally great response from Dr. K.
4:46 Hey Trainwrecks, I know exactly what you mean with the burning eyes thing. I had the same thing for years. My theory is that there's a problem with our sleep, not the quantity but the quality, like we don't go deep enough in it on our own. This worked for me, but don't know if it might work for you, couple of sleep drops just before bed time (Xanax, careful with that stuff, some people use it as a drug but a few drops should be fine). Cleared me right up all the way through the following day. EDIT: Ok, checked up on Xanax addiction and it absolutely is a thing. DISREGARD what I said and consult a medical professional. Not gonna delete the comment tho. Also, to be clear, I wasn't talking about the pills, just the liquid droplets.
Gamer eyes bro, happened to me and friends in HS when we would stay up for multiple days and then sleep for a few hours and wake up late afternoon sun blazing thru the blinds
@@Manded we were not exactly the types to do drugs haha, just nerdy gamers. But holy shit, it's crazy to think we were able to do that when I can barely pull off an all-nighter coked up on caffeine at 21, jittering off into a nice midday sleep.
1:11:55 I have so much respect for Dr. K for being able to sift through all that and remain engaged. I lost track at minute 5. I should not be a psychiatrist.
trainwrecks wonders why some people dislike him... reckful told the story how he met trainwrecks the first time, he basically lied about having a mansion and some cars and got reckful and other streamers to go there. reckful always disliked trainwrecks since then, but it was trainwrecks foot in the door for the streamer scene . entrance with a big lie
Knowing him, Reckful likely may had overreacted or exaggerated the gravity of the situation-for example, Train might've been talking about his parents' mansion but just didn't put much effort in making the distinctions between his parents stuff and his own stuff. Would you say something like that may have happened there? (I haven't seen videos describing this situation you're talking about, so I don't have much)
@@devilmayclarify666 nope. just put in "Reckful explains how Trainwreckz shamelessly finessed Reynad, Mitch and himself" in google and watch the clip yourself.
@@felsway5398 sure thing, lets give him a 2nd chance. oh what happened? he promoted a crypto currency scam? i guess we give him a 2nd chance. oh what happened? he threatened glinks and called him the n word on social media? lets give him a 2nd chance. the list goes on - you can give him a 100th chance. you do you
i really like train as a streamer, but something about this interview seems off. He says a lot without saying anything, like someone is behind him with a gun and if he says the wrong thing then its over for him. I think he is being genuine but I think being live on stream really hindered any progress that could of been had in this specific discussion .
I did this thing a few years ago where I forced myself to smile and laugh in the mirror. I was so stuck in self louthing(?) that I had to knock myself out of it. I realised it didn't help me and got tired of the hate after a while. Sort of worked seeing myself look happy, was nostalgic. Sort of meditative albeit very wierd routine. Feel much better nowdays.
Train, i had this impression of you that you mentioned at the beginning but after this video i guess we could be good friends :D Its weird how much you can change your view in a short period of time. Sorry. Had to write that because it felt uncomfortable. Have a good day!
Keep austin weird is sadly not a thing anymore. We used to have hippie cowboys. Now its just SJW style progressives. Nothing "weird" about it. I miss the Austin of 20 years ago
Just an interesting thought (time 44min) In the beginningDr.K wanted to hear about Trains parents, train started to talk about bullies, now as Dr.K wanted to ask about upbringing train said "or do you want to hear the bully story", and as Dr.K stayed with the parents, train said he needs a quick break. So maybe I should watch the whole vid before commenting but seems like there is something he doesnt want to get into :)
yeah, all the bullying seem to have made him doubt every single word he uses, which seem to make him want validation with "you know?" all the time. has to be very stressful to live like that no matter how confident he is otherwise
i think it could be helpfull if Train didn't drink coffee or took any stimulants and maybe do some meditation before talking to slow him down a little bit, he is all over the place
train needs to read books more. hes spent so long producing words unstructured, itd be good for him to memorize more typical structured language to pull from
Your comment might sound like you're calling Train illiterate, or something like that, but I don't think that your comment is a jab at all. Anecdotally I can tell you that the more I've read over the years (or listened to audiobooks, or even watched lectures), the more I've been able to learn how to sufficiently articulate my thoughts. Getting a vocabulary buff from reading is a tremendous piece of that puzzle. There are words that I use nowadays that I didn't know how to use half a decade ago, and such words are absolutely pivotal for me in expressing my mind more clearly. I actually remember back to when I rambled and stumbled more often due to not having the vocabulary or structure that I've gained from reading. And I'm not even necessarily an avid reader. The people I know who read way more than I do often come across to me as even more articulate and concise. So the general value of reading seems explicit in influencing how clearly someone communicates, and how little they find themselves in dynamics of miscommunication. I find that "To read more" is just a simple, neutral encouragement. Switching up genres helps, too. I'll often get more out of nonfiction than fiction, especially if it's academically oriented.
For my fellow boomers out there Train reminds me of Domingo Chavez from the early days of Rainbow Six. rainbowsix.fandom.com/wiki/Domingo_Chavez/Video_Game?file=Chavezrainbow6.jpg
