Manosphere Content Is Getting Worse w/ Alanah Pearce 

Regained, technically. TL;DR: The "Wild West" is the main origin of toxic masculinity as we know it today. Colonialism cemented European patriarchy as the standard mindset and made alienating perspectives "savagery", "sacrilege", and "corrupt/decadent". Prior to that, in the wider world and even in Europe the concept of brotherhood between men was extremely common. Most old literature and mythological cycles involve extremely intimate relationships between men. These can be analyzed in a queer lens to extract romance, but many are also meant to be viewed as platonic and are not treated as abnormal. The phrase "Blood is thicker than water" actually comes from “The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.” Covenant here refers to a forged bond, not necessarily anything religious, and it's about how forged bonds are greater than those you didn't choose. The default in the past amongst most people, men included, was "form close bonds with others, you can rely on them and open up to them." It was extremely common to see men openly weep with their friends back then. In many cultures the physical intimacy of male friends still persists to this day (hand-holding, kiss greetings, cuddling, hugging, etc.) Remember when people made fun of GWBush for holding hands with that Saudi Official? None of that was useful to Colonialism, and *especially* not the Rugged Individualist masculinity of the frontier. Western expansion of America incentivized you to be a cool, self-sufficient "pioneer". They wanted resilient and stubborn men to walk onto other people's land, build a house, and then murder anyone who pointed out they shouldn't be there. Then American Media took over the world and exported that mindset everywhere. Soft Fraternity and Masculine Queerness was never incompatible with patriarchy, they could just view it in their heads as "men are better company because women are inferior", so it's not that men back then were less misogynistic, but they did support one another. What we're seeing now is the rejection of Rugged Individualist Maculinity and a return towards more traditional forms of fraternity. Hopefully that mingles with intersectional feminism to create more fraternities of anti-patriarchy men, a Men's Liberation as it is commonly called.

@@Primalintentok grandma lets get you to bed /j

@@jacksonm6969 Also John Wayne was a piece of shit and a shitty actor, just like Charleton Heston. Where are my pills

@@Primalintent This was really interesting, thank you for sharing, and it's funny that you used the word platonic in the colloquial sense of "non-romantic/non-sexual" when that itself came about from the post-neoplatonist christian movement in which Plato was retroactively desexualized in readings of intimate male friendships that were, by all accounts, rather sexual relationships.

​@@candyh4284 wait that's crazy haha, idk how I didn't make that connection. Well I guess I hadn't read the source material that the word was established in. But yeah those Greeks knew how to emote. Reading about saffo and the different interpretations of her poem fragments over time is really interesting too, once again because different people attribute different amounts of romantic affection to what she's saying

Same has been studied with just existing. In a room with 50% men and 50% women, the men report there being mostly women in the room and few men. The mere presence of women feels like it takes up more space for them for some reason.

When she brought that up, the study you mentioned immediately came to my mind.

I've noticed this just from people's side comments in my college classes. I'm blown away there's a real stat about this. Holy shit. (Sincerely, a trans guy who's lived 90% of life "as a woman")

I think someone actually knitted a quilt that showed how often men talked over women.

How many of these studies have been performed with men of different backgrounds and of other demographics? I could easily replicate the results of that study by handpicking specific women who would come to the same conclusion. There are many factors that could lead to one gender in a study feeling the other spoke more. Studies today are heavily politicized and are used to support a specific opinion. It’s like if I went out and surveyed 10,000 men asking them if they felt superior to women, and say 500 said they do feel superior. I could then publish the results of only 800 men that included those 500 and state that over 50% of men believe they are superior. This happens way more than people would be willing to admit.

What ad was it

@@brkh96 idk. i skipped it as soon as i could but it started out with “are you getting tired of your wife?”

​​@@dareusdesign😁 that opening line on its own sounds like the beginning of a parody or bit that a commentary channel would do

Tell em king

Lets blame freedom. Id rather be a slave anyway.

@@woah56capitalism is the reason slavery even existed lmao

​@@woah56I'd be very interested if you could present a valid and true argument with the conclusion that capitalism is the most freeing economic system.

​@@woah56 Yeah man I'm sure the slaves working for the Hershey corporation feel free. Or all the sweatshop workers, or every prisoner in America working for dollars by the hour. The reason slavery existed and still exists is so capitalists have free labor. Braindead take.

It's a good thing that you're so sure of yourself and strong minded, because parents who say things like that can really mess up a child and make him an irresponsible mess

I so relate to parents assuming that I should date any guy I do a project with. I’m a math major; it’s mostly men there. Can’t date every man I worked with even if I want to. It’s also unprofessional. We meet up for a specific reason: schoolwork. I’m not going to turn it into something more complicated that the guy didn’t sign up for

❤❤❤

Man that's scary that your parents believe that just because you interact with a woman while doing a collaborative project that you are entitled to/should ask her out. It reminds of one cr1tikal's more recent videos on that guy who collaborated with a girl on a project in uni and felt because he bought her a pizza that she should date him. I don't really understand why collaborative or friendly interactions between ppl of the opposite gender have many (men I notice, but also some women) feel that the cooperation automatically entails entitlement to dating the other person. I feel that the sentiment is mostly in American and Canadian culture (I'm Canadian myself). I've had multiple experiences as a feminine-presenting person where someone would compliment my shoes/style etc. and I would thank them and compliment them back - and then that person starts asking questions about how old I am/if I'm from town/if I'm single etc. It's extremely unnerving that just exchanging simple compliments, or validating someone's emotions when they're upset, has people feel that the interaction is of a romantic/sexual nature. Partially I wonder if it is due to, especially in America, the historical influence of the Puritans. Since they had very strict practices of modesty that essentially made any platonic/friendly actions of other cultures inherently romantic/sexualized such as: kissing family members as a welcome or goodbye gesture, sharing emotions with family, living with family for extended periods of time (like into ones 20s and beyond), the ability to be less clothed/naked around family members for short periods in a non-sexual way etc.

And we love you for knowing who you are 🫶🏽

I really feel like in recent times, many people are becoming more aggressive, vicious, and cruel towards one another while a lack of empathy is on the low and seeing other people as just "NPCs" is on the rise. A lot of times, I feel like the world is generally becoming a meaner and meaner place.

@@johnwalker1058 honestly I think the only reason we think that is because of the development of social media not only do we have more recorded evidence of people being awful but we also have the veil of anonymity that being online can bring so people feel they can say whatever we want. Like we’re obviously not as bad as earlier in history with colonialism and mass genocide and segregation but with how many people there are and vocal those awful people can be it seems like things are only becoming worse

For real. I deleted tiktok for awhile and re dowloaded it after a couple months. Every comment section was absolutely horrid and made me delete the app again after about 10 minutes.

It sucks that they probably won't. I don't honestly know what accountability would look like in this case, for starters. Even then, these grifters can always say they didn't do anything wrong, we're trying to silence them, they're just giving self improvement advice, any way they want to spin it. And the followers they have under their thumb already believe that, and they'll jump in to protect their idols. It's incredibly depressing to say, but I think the only way this will change is if enough of us collectively just try to ignore/discourage it. I think we're doing the best thing we possibly can for it, as insignificant as it feels.

People are scared of change and the unknown, and when deeply rooted cultural issues like white supremacy, patriarchy, or heteronormativity are being challenged, that fear is channeled into disgust, anger, and hatred towards people who are different

​@@mcswashbuckler3833 You're 100% right. I know the reasons but I will never be able to comprehend how someone can be so rooted in their own insecurities that they marginalize an entire group of people. For generations! It honestly disgusts the hell out of me. I know they are ignorant and small minded but I only have one word for it: Evil. To be so threaten by someone who is different , beautiful, happy human beings, that you decide to belittle, diminish, intimidate, control, abuse, r*pe or even m*rder them is completely beyond me. I am glad we have creators like Alanah, Jarvis and Jordan who use their platform to educate young people and create a safe place for everyone to talk about how they feel wronged and also hold people accountable for their bigotry

I was lucky to fall into the progressive side of the internet

I understand it I just hate it

@@superman-wt6wk do you? Do you agree?

Imo, TikTok is worse. It's TT, IG, YT. Twitter and FB don't count since they're not representative of mainstream media but cater to special groups

Tiktok can create really bad echo chambers too

@@solarprogeny6736unfortunately instagram isnt just echo chambers, everyone is harassed everywhere

@@solarprogeny6736the reel algorithm is just super weird for the comments I think or something, bc they’re on a completely different level

Yeah that makes a lot of sense. If you have to change yourself in ways that are inauthentic to gain the attention if a woman, you may have to evaluate whether that attention is something you really want.

your self-worth shouldn't be hostage to a romantic partner: find deeper friendships and deeper connections with your family members. when you have a net of platonic love, finding a romantic partner becomes a choice rather than a necessity. that's why I'm so glad to have my friends in my life (and that's why so many single women are happier)

@@renatal.129 i agree with you also.

Congratulations to you and your wife.

congrats! and as a woman, i agree with your wife's sentiment. it's just a bad financial decision to spend so much money on a ring (or a bugatti while we're at it)

I watch various videos from people of all different views. While I don’t agree with everything that people like Ben Shapiro say (and also others that have an opposing view), I don’t think I can call what he says nonsense. He makes a lot of good points, so you can acknowledge good points from individuals while also disagreeing with them on others. It’s like Andrew Tate, he makes some good points but is also a pretty toxic human being. If you just label someone “bad” or “good” solely based on who they are, then I feel that can limit one’s ability to be objective and a critical thinker. I find it way more useful to step out of one’s echo chamber and constantly challenge yourself and be honest about others.

it's crazy how much that kind of baiting is like fascism. "this country has been humiliated! vote me to make it better!"

That's what I'm saying. I no longer care that "were failing men", they're failing themselves! If the patient doesn't care how can the doctor? They don't want help they want to wallow in self pity and take it out on minorities and women on the Internet that's their problem they can help their selfs 😂

That's why I'm grateful for people like Jarvis. It is not women's responsibility to "fix" men and they shouldn't be expected to. If they really need help they need good role models. It's unfortunate there are so many bad ones.

​@@ifwrainbow190While you should never be forced to care, the relationship between a doctor and a patient is not at all the same as the relationship of society... to society. I personally think we do have some duty to reach out and not alienate, but I'm not saying that men aren't guilty of their own alienation either

@@ifwrainbow190 i think the point is that you can reach these people before they're off the deep end, if you talk to them reasonably and give them the benefit of the doubt you can catch them before they become the type of people you need protection from

Well, since we're talking about a whole group, it's made up of individuals. Nobody is automatically a bad person because of their sex or gender. The idea isn't to save Andrew Tate---it's to help the literal boys who are still innocent but in danger of falling under his influence.

Patriarchy doesn’t exist in America. If men are being harmed, it’s not a patriarchy.

​@@tomcoop9750the point they're trying to make, I think, is that the way the "patriarchy" hurts everyone is by perpetuating beliefs and behaviors that hurt people. So when men are suffering psychologically from emotional repression, feelings of inferiority, and the like, it may very well be because of the actions and beliefs of other men. Hence, patriarchy, the thing that normally "benefits" men, is now the thing that is harming them. Those two are not inherently contradictory. Its like shooting oneself on the foot, metaphorically speaking.

The problem with men forming communities is that hating women is apparently the only thing that unites men

This is so spot on!! You nailed it!

They get locked into this idea that if a couple doesn't form, it's either their own fault (easily leads to depression) or the other person's fault (easily leads to anger) instead of realizing that most of the time a relationship is just not meant to be and it doesn't mean either person did anything wrong.

For your first paragraph, I’d say the reason behind it is because women are conditioned to put up with a lot, even abuse

I also hate this narrative because whenever I see a news article about someone getting arrested for CSA related charges, it's almost always a presumably cis man or woman (because if they were trans the article would probably mention it).

Sorry you went through what you did. But if you expect an expensive ring because you believe the man is going to be toxic on some level and it’s your right to some financial stability. Then sorry you are entitled. What you’re doing is justifying your sexist view of men just to gain an expensive ring. What you should be doing is saving up your own money to protect yourself like most responsible people do and use the time before the ring is bought to be honest with yourself about whether a guy is worth your time or not. Men who don’t receive any expensive gifts before marriage (and responsible women) create their own financial stability.

@@Roach22 lol, did you miss the part where I said he stole all my savings? Also, like most abusers, the abuse didn't start until after we were married and I was trapped. There wasn't time beforehand to realize he was a bad guy because he specifically hid that part of himself.

@@MAL-wy2fz No, I read everything. You have a right to pass judgement on your ex, who sounds like a terrible person. But that doesn't justify anyone being prejudice against others purely because of their gender. My ex-girlfriend from some years ago did something similar to me, but I don't judge other woman because of that. While no one can ignore your experience, I hope you change your opinion on men because you've possibly already overlooked some great men since then.

​@@Roach22Regardless of whether or not it's reasonable, she's not judging "men". She's scared of not seeing signs before it's too late, and she's scared of being in that position or worse. It's obvious and understandable trauma. If I offer you a bowl of skittles, and tell you that there's one skittle in there that will give you food poisoning. You might make the risk assessment of the hundreds of fine skittles and eat some happily. But somebody who has had terrible food poisoning before isn't likely to take the same chances.

I understand your fear, but plenty of expensive rings have little resale value. I cannot imagine trying to explain that some expensive ring isn't good enough for me because I think you might turn out to be an abuser. I genuinely empathise with the position you've been in and that you refuse to be vulnerable to that again, but I feel that view is unreasonable. I think a more viable way to navigate it might be to refuse to merge assets, or at least keep a portion separate. Make sure if you choose to have children that if you don't go back to work you have emergency funds in your personal accounts to protect yourself, and take measures to make sure that there's no way it can be stolen by your partner. The ring thing doesn't just put a strange financial pressure on your partner, that they may or may not be able to afford. It also just doesn't sound like it would protect you as much as other more proactive and personal ways to protect yourself. Anyway, if you ever take another serious relationship or ever remarry good luck and I hope you both find happiness together. If not, just delete the together and both from that last sentence

💕💕💕💕

It's important to remember that IQ is not what people make it out to be. Essentially it's a standardized test, and all the things that make standardized testing $h!tty often applies to IQ testing. That is why IQ scores consistently rise in populations as they get more access to education. There was an interesting experiment where they told teachers that kids with blue eyes were more intelligent. The teachers started treating those kids differently (paying more attention to them, etc), and then when they tested the kids IQs, they scored higher. Then they switched and said "oops, actually it's the kids with the brown eyes that are smarter ". And then the brown eyed kids scored higher. The inventor of the IQ test designed to place kids in classes based on their strengths and weaknesses, and he was horrified at the way people were using. There is a long history of using the IQ test to prop up r@cism & s3xism.

You’re not less intelligent than your peers. There are many different forms of intelligence. If it’s harder for you to learn as quickly as others, then you just need more time, and that’s cool. It doesn’t mean you’re less intelligent.

There is nothing about any aspects of your identity that make you lesser than. Many of our learning systems are also incredibly unfriendly to neurodivergent people. It’s awful people say those things and I’m so sorry, but know that it’s all based on prejudiced bs and you are wonderful

It's because of this type of response why I'm really glad the public perception around IQ has been shifting away from the exact science it was believed to be for so long, to the more accurate truth that it's really just an arbitrary number that doesn't fucking matter. It's not a measure of intelligence, it's a measure of learning ability, and even THEN, it's not truly possible to qualify that using a number, that doesn't make any sense.

So the asshole gets coddled by assholes, and that somehow makes us the assholes? Grow tf up, people aren’t obligated to fix your personal problems.

The latter I think. less likely to hide their stupidity as there's now so many Dunning Kreuger loud boys screaming how confident they are in being really dim they think that they can just follow suit without criticism. And when they face criticism they blame women.

This manifestation of "the manosphere" is a response to that "radical feminism".. But.. The feminism we are talking about is a spectre. One dreamed up, packaged and sold to men by mostly men. A disproportionate reaction to kids, clickbait articles, misrepresented academics, angry women, unreasonable women. They shone a spotlight on so much stuff that didn't really mean anything, weren't real pushes for social change, or wouldn't have been seen by anybody otherwise. Through fearmongering and ridicule, it was a wildly successful narrative that managed to make sure the word feminist remained dirty. Meanwhile making a bunch of men a niche content farm and a whole lot of money.

fr, let's just vibe. Who needs a government paper to say we're committed to each other when we both know we are.