Mormon leader says people are leaving for clout (but secretly coming back) 

Lol this is a good way to put it 😅

In general, most religions have gone from the silent majority to the prophetic minority! While membership is continuing to dwindle, those remaining are more likely to more zealous and steadfast about their beliefs, and are more prone to having no limits when it comes to promoting their religion.

​@@ericnelson9100 Probably because the moderating voices are leaving.

Brad has always been loud, always, he loves being front stage, I guess some people just are that way

@@China-Clay So are these apostles or whatever, are they failed actors?

I wonder how commonly this happens. Then that begs the question, how much does that skew their numbers even MORE? Thinking all these people are active members and unknowingly having far fewer members than their data suggests?

@@kadenfiala4899 The church knows they are reporting inflated and misleading numbers. They keep track of who attends, pays tithing, and who doesn’t. They kept tabs on me and kept contacting me until I resigned.

For real. A lot of my friends feel like they can't resign for many reasons that are personal to them. Quite a few are also PIMO. Myself, I'm glad we all resigned in my little family.

@@Wren402In 2013 I got a call from what sounded like a nice old lady, trying to update membership records. I hadn't been to Church in about a decade at that point and told her I was not interested in updating my records and wanted to be removed from the membership rolls. She told me she didn't know how to go about doing that and after a few other phone calls I was finally told I needed to go through my bishop and a "church court" in order to resign. There was no way I was doing that, (I had no idea who my bishop was anyway and didn't care) so I hired my own attorney who handled the whole process for me. Took about a year of back and forth but I finally got my membership removed. It was really annoying and shouldn't be that hard.

​​​​@@LongJourneys My husband and I had our names officially removed because we didn't want to be used as a statistic and neither did we ever want to be contacted again. We typed up a letter each and hand delivered it to our stake president, although I believe they prefer you to give the letter to your bishop. We could have mailed it, I suppose but we wanted it done as quickly as possible. A few weeks later, we received a letter from them stating that our names had been removed. We never went through any court.

there should be a name or specific award for this

Same. They can’t say we didn’t give them a fair go 😂

Same lol

Curious, if you're open to sharing. What took you back to the church?

@@ScottJB So the first time I left it was because my mental health wasn't great and I was dealing with family problems. I was angry at God. My situation got worse and I thought it was because I was rebellious. So I came back and started to go to YSA. I made friends in my branch and it was my main incentive of going. My sister started deconstructing and shared some things she learned. At first I didn't want to hear it but then I looked into the church history myself. And when I found out about the truth, I knew that I was done with the church. My sister decided to stay regardless. But I left. And later I found out that my friends have already deconstructed as well but didn't say anything until after so they wouldn't influence my decision.

💯

What's pimo?

​@@Papiliodaniphysically in mentally out

@@nemiamzcurrently me 😩

100%

I left because his talks, and other leaders talks are so cringe.

@@radybay9088I never understood why brad was so popular. Even when I was a member with no questions/doubts. He just always rubbed me the wrong way I guess

@@WaffleSaladWhy are any of these soul-free, ghoulish monotone drones popular? I mean, you're telling me that that creepy, arrogant, toupee-wearing weirdo David Bednar and his pill-popping wife actually resonate with anyone? Anyone actually think that even when Russel Nelson wasn't ancient that he wasn't a total creep? I'd love to know what the selection process is, pretty sure it has nothing to do with appeal, talent, relatability or showmanship.

Seems like they always find some sin to pin on you as a reason for leaving. My wife and I left the church together during college. People often still mistake us for Mormons, as we both just naturally act a certain way due to our upbringing, and we rarely drink for health reasons. Members have a hard time pinning any actual sin on us as a cause for leaving, so they accuse us of leaving because we want to have our Sundays free or some bullshit, as if that would be motivation to give up eternal life. Somehow they just can't accept that we left since we sincerely do not believe in the bull the church is pedaling.

Same! I love sinning now, but back then I just wanted to (checks notes) pervert the sacred institution of marriage and defile the temple that is my body.

Oh, Liz Bates, you are the absolute worst! I could stand to have a few more reprobates like you in my friend group. I learned two very interesting things while deconstructing: 1) I have had a master course in manipulation, and giving up on being the manipulator the church trained me to be took some serious doing, and 2) when you stop trying to manipulate everyone around you into the correct box or pigeonhole that they belong in (per the correlation blueprint), and just let them be who or what they are, accepting them as they are, they are so much more interesting, and our relationships are so much less shallow and superficial. It turns out that everyone is a sinner, but very few people are actually evil. And the really evil ones don't leave to sin: they are perfectly content to stay and sin. Once again, the church teaches the opposite of reality.

People are mistaking you because you're acting the way you were brought up? So you're still acting Mormon then. Very bizarre! Better stop acting. Someone might think you're faking it. Im not into organized religion of any kind. However why waste your breath on something you so blatantly despise? I see so many exmos that their only purpose in life is to be judgmental (which is part of the reason you left) and for hating it so fiercely it becomes an obsession. I mean what a waste of life! Enjoy your lives. Without contention and judgements. You left, you're free don't dwell on the past when it was obviously not a happy place you wanted to be in. It's an absolute contradiction a lot of what these anti religion groups spout is just hate and judgment. Do they hate all Mormons as people? Or the religion. Do they not have any Mormon friends at all, or family. Is it worth losing relationships over? I completely understand that there are members out there and even family that are ridiculously offended by EVERYTHING! It's very sad and disheartening to see people treated like trash over and over just because of their beliefs. I respect people's desire to chose their own paths. Do what makes you feel good, makes you happy. I mean what I say with the utmost respect for all people involved. I have been inactive for 30yrs. And don't plan to be again. But I don't want to be so angry to the point I'm doing the same thing they are only with a more bitter tone. I honestly would love to have a conversation about this. So I can better understand. I apologize for the rant and novel. Religion sucks. It's always a place of resentment and discontent.

Years of therapy later… “I hate my life all I have are cats and my girlfriend smells” I used to think religions were intolerant of gays until my cousin who was openly lesbian got married to a (very short and dweeby) man at the age of about 40. She has never been religious; on the contrary she was raised in a very left wing secular world view. She didn’t try to change herself. In reality multigenerational feminism has made it so very few people want to date western women so a lot of young women these days express lesbian sexuality instead of admitting to their own unpopularity from adhering to toxic, self-serving and unrealistic self-perception.

I keep having nightmares about staying in the church and I know that they would stop if I spoke my truth loudly but the consequences would be severe.

I’ve had nightmares where I’m back in the church and I bear my testimony that I know the church is a fraud and subsequently being dragged away from the microphone. 😛

🙃

That doesn't surprise me for an instant.

So many of my friends and family who left after me are people I would sworn would never leave. And then...

I've never heard of a member genuinely asking an exmo why they left, they just assume its for sin/unfaithfulness/laziness. add that to r/thathappened as well lol

Good on you. Wish I could bring myself to due the same. My siblings know, but I have never directly told my parents, and I don't think they want to know. I make it pretty obvious I no longer believe, but they try their best to act like they haven't noticed I haven't been to church, or have declined giving prayers for the last decade. Guess I always felt far less important than the church in my family growing up. Makes it hard to fully bite the bullet and give my parents a hard stance about my leaving.

@@TheWrigle I'm sorry, that's tough😔 Stay strong!

I can't believe you would jump on a silly trend like that! Shame!

I've occasionally worked with people who used friendly emoji in email and were really unpleasant in person, but most people I've worked with who use emoji are genuinely friendly and it really does make the email feel softer and more personable. Keep doing what you do. As long as you're genuine, I don't think most people will have an issue with it.

As an Autistic women, I use emojis a lot, because I know my writing and speech can come across in unintended way (for example, too formal at times.) Emojis help me share the tone I'm intending :)

🥰 It’s the Rare beauty blush in whatever the baby pink type color is and Westman Atelier highlighter stick! The new camera REALLY makes it go hard hahaha I thought about toning it down

😜😜😜

I was totally going to post this same comment.

Actually though. I remember several testimony meeting where people proudly talked about how their faith is so much stronger now because they understand how bad it is Out There and theyre sooo grateful for gods forgiveness. If people are coming back quietly it's because their wards aren't as forgiving of people who stumble as they pretend to be

Hahahaha

love to meet another mckenna connoisseur!

I was so devout. Believed through and through - never imagined that I would leave. Never imagined any physical proof would be enough to pull me from faith. But that temple ceremony... What a beautiful lie.

Good for you, God the real God is worth knowing.

Gotta say, it’s downright hilarious that you mentioned the underwear like it was the most damaging bullet you dodged. 😂😂😂 That’s not even close to the worst of it. You are so lucky. 😗 I’m jealous. “I just never got into the mormonism” Love this comment so much. Seriously, so much.❤ You made my day.

Also, are we going to talk about the Kirtland Temple Transfer/all go on a field trip together to visit it?

VALID

@@ZelphOntheShelf I appreciate your hard work. Baptist, not Mormon, but had its own weirdness. Love your growth and opinions! Keep it fresh 👉😎👉

also how do i get in on this costa rica thing? @@ZelphOntheShelf

we screamed about it all day yesterday and are gonna do a video today!

​@@ZelphOntheShelf@kobihatsy9286 I was wondering the same thing and was letting out little shouts of excitement while watching their video! I can't wait to see your reaction!!! ❤

⁠@@ZelphOntheShelfomg I can’t wait to see the video! I just couldn’t believe how much was unpacked in one video, they were dropping bombshells left, right and centre 🤯. Dav knew what he was doing, he knew we would fangirling so hard over this hahaha

I came to ask this too! I watched It and it was the fist time I’ve ever raw dogged one of girl defined’s videos like that 😅 I thought it was so great! I was so excited when Dav said he and Bethy watched Zelph on the shelf and I have to see their thoughts on the whole video!

⁠​⁠@@meala00it was my first time too! Always watched reactions before. I just had a feeling about this one. Must’ve been the Holy Ghost 😂

JESUS VALENTINE!!

Oooooh

Hahahaha

As the original Nemo, I approve this message

😅

Great question 😅 they definitely play down the more nationalist parts in other countries and emphasize JESUS more etc

@@ZelphOntheShelf that is so interesting! You learn something new every day.

Plus, the places they're outsourcing to don't have the best internet, so locals can't do research for themselves.

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Tanner is disgustingly good at all impressions!

Hahahaha

😂

Ps I think you both may know my younger brother

Ooh who?!

@@ZelphOntheShelf Andrew Murdoch.

@@ZelphOntheShelf he was a communications major at BYUI and worked with soapbox agency around the same time you guys were there.

Quitmormon website