Thanks for your videos Alexander. Because of your voice in that whole dating stuff I didn't become bitter, resentful and frustrated guy who hates women. I love that you're not spiteful but also merciless and brutally honest when speaking truth about women. I hope you realize how many men you helped with debunking the myth of women as pure, angelic, almost transcendential beings from another world, who only care about men's soul.
BTW I realize the video was not about it, but I just wanted to comment in order to both help the youtube algorithm and give a shoutout to Alexander before even watching :)
I wish I can get over the resentment though. I'm really starting to hate them and it's affecting my day to day life. I used to be in relationships but I've been used and abused, discarded, humiliated, it's like I suddenly got this target on my forehead
@@kitesupreme8907 I'm very sorry that it happened to you. I hope you will sort this out. Remember, your past does not have to define your future and also it is not a shame to look for a professional help.
yes same. I still get that resentment feeling when I watch some vids of other creators sometimes but mostly when I watch AG it helps me rationalize it.
LOL !! Or to quote Dumb & Dumber: "So you're saying, I have a chance?" I think the mating part of the life cycle is a small part, not the main part. So it is with animals so it is with humans! Enjoy each part and "dance to the music of time".
@@hevnervals The ones that settled for a man, or are in the process of leaving him. No such thing as a "breadwinner wife" can exist in this world, women themselves won't allow it, because they don't want to be in that position.
Pickup "artists" selling the player lifestyle are like feminists, both are crabs stuck in a misery bucket and both are trying their hardest to keep everyone else with them.
Nah, its fun to date multiple women. They sell their courses for money, not to make people miserable. The customers are not paying for misery, but results.
Sure, if you find a high quality woman. But they are extremely rare and you still need to be in the top 5% to be selected by a high quality woman unless she is totally inexperienced and doesn't know her own value. Being in relationship with the average modern woman sucks, she thinks she deserves everything while offering nothing in return. It's not worth it. It's only headaches and problems and hard work.
@@JJ-hu4cm Dating these modern women, probably. Hell! You only need 10 min. watching tiktok videos or something like that to reach the same conclusion.
At 24, my wife of (now) 30 years actually kicked to the curb a guy who was tall, rich and very good-lookiing -- for me. Because he wasn't a good person. Quality women are out there. The question for every man is whether he can recognize her when she comes along. If he's laser-focused on tits, ass and "getting some," he's likely to miss the gems who actually come his way.
@@graymatters7584 I'm glad you had a good experience a while ago but honestly man, now a days it's all changed, even from 6 years ago. Women have totally changed, the good ones, if there are any, are all taken. Guys do recognize a good thing when they find it generally. But in general, there is not a lot of good ones out there. A lot are spoiled, entitled brats to put it nicely.
@@JJ-hu4cm Is this a serious question or are you trying to virtue signal? I'm not interested in woke or PC culture if that's your angle. You can't have missed that there is a lot of talk of what men need to do in order to be a good partner for a woman, but there is seldom any focus on what women need to do to be a good partner for a man. Even to suggest that women also need to learn how treat a man right is offensive. The blame is always on the man. All of society tells women they are perfect just the way they are, beautiful in every size and that they deserve everything and more just for existing. It's no wonder women have high expectations on men while also thinking it is enough for women to just show up and exist. Any man should be lucky to have her regardless of how she looks, how she behaves or the amount of effort she spends. This is what I've seen myself in modern western women, and also what I've heard from others. Of course there are exceptions, but most modern women bring more trouble than they are worth in my opinion. Maybe you have a different experience? Tell me. But for the average guy. Value your own happiness and mental well-being, either find the rare exception or stay single. Don't bother trying to make a relationship work with any of the others. If you are not the top 5% she will just resent you or disrespect you anyway, for being less than what she really deserves. I'm speaking from 15+ years experience in relationships. I choose to be single now and I've never been happier.
Love doesn't exist in relationships, it is a business transaction. She gets: money, resources, protection and leadership. He gets: sex, food, kids and companionship.
Love does exist. Love is the good feeling both sides get to feel when there is chemistry, and love is the feeling of happiness both sides feel when there is genuine physical/personal attraction. Relationships are about love. What is love? Love is 2 things: first it's a good feeling an emotion, but second it's an action (the action of giving to fulfill each other's needs) Relationships are about love (the emotion) and love (the act of giving) to fulfill each other's needs. Women are meant to receive affection, security and protection. Men are meant to receive sexual intimacy and good companionship. Love so real, we just don't understand it.
So much truth in this - the sexual debt feeling, the emptiness in casual encounters, the feeling of having missed out, and desire for a deep relationship.
I have to say that I agree one hundred percent. After divorcing at 29, the reality of the dating market hit me like a train. Over 13 years later, I have completely checked out and no longer dating.
Great video Alexander not enough men speak about things like this. It's suprising how many Chads I have spoken to who told me how empty they felt living the promiscuous life and they walked away from it.
I haven’t lived that life, and part of me wonders what it would be like. Just for my own experience. Even if I only slept with two three more girls. I’m 34 and wish I just gotten this out of my system a decade ago.
Married guy here... 25 years and very happy. But hell for 10 years and nearly divorced until i learned RP and applied to my marriage. My initial choice was quality, but I became fat and more and more beta after the kids were born. RP + quality + wisdom and confidence that comes with age. Still going to the gym. Going in a few mins. Never stop working out. Never stop improving yourself. That is the first place to start.
Why was it nearly divorce? 25 years marriage is an accomplishment even 10 years, assuming you have a 100% faithful women that never stepped out in all those years, and you wife didn't weaponize affection or children, or gaslight abuse.
Thank you so much Alexander, you have spoken to one of my biggest insecurities. I used to think that my lack of high numbers meant that I was a failure with women and a failure as a man. Hanging out with the wrong crowds of guys who chased P* week in week out messed me up. I have messed up good relationships with good women in the pursuit of a hi body count. I know see it was the biggest waist of my time in my life. Time I will never get back!!! I have rookie numbers to my friends but I am the happiest out of all of them since I have changed. I only have a body count of 17, but to get to that number, i had to stoop down way to many times and would be ashamed to even be associated with these woman. Thank goodness I stopped, or I would have continued sleeping with women I would never give the time or day to because they are not people I value. Thanks again Alexander, appreciate all that you do for us men. keep up the good work.
One time She asked my age I said 35 Then i asked the same question to her The conversation was over This was done in text Irl i make a whole deffirent impression That's why online dating suck's One wrong word and you are done
TALK TO WOMEN WHEN YOU GO SHOPPING fer sh*tsake. In waiting rooms. Strike up conversations. Even passing on the sidewalk. Sitting INSIDE on a DEVICE is thuglife-put yourself out there. CALL US when you get our number. Only text, "Can I call you?"
By the way, I recently learned that if we skip the ads, you don't get any money. I won't skip the ads in your videos from now on. I didn't know that it worked that way.
So true! Even when you are successful with dating, it takes so much time!! The only return that is worthwhile is to make a plan, stay focused, find a great partner, make a life together.
Woah! Hold up. A dude leaves a faithful wife and kids for selfish reasons and he is a victim of circumstance? Isn't that what we accuse women of? Not taking responsibility....
@@romkobomko3200I know but had he used an example of a woman there would be outrage in this comment section and I also do not think he would have the same level of sympathy for a woman doing this. He would have called her low value.
@@romkobomko3200Yeah, I personally think that that men should never chase happiness. A man should be fulfilled by duty and service to his community and to the greater human community. Every contribution is valuable from the genitor to the CEO. If you go looking to contribute to mankind in your own way you will never be distracted by the little things. But that's just me.
@@josetheman239 It seems to me, that you are in agreement with Aristotle. He believed that happiness comes with chasing "arete". Arete means virtue in ancient greek. But some people consider meaning of "arete" as excelence, as virtue is an example of one.
"If you believe that a lot of money will make you happy, then you never really had a lot of money". The same goes for women, I was the player who had A LOT of women over years believing it makes me feel happy and superior. Alexander is right, it is not worth it, but I can understand many guys who struggle to meet women at all who believe sleeping around is satisfying. But I can say, it is not
The topic in this vid is very important and resonates with me greatly, but I cant get rid of the feeling like my youth is fleeting away and trying to casually meet people just doesnt fork for your average Иван :(
I've had times in my life that had abundance with women... it's so true. I've never sunk so low in my life. Find someone who cherishes you for who you are and stick with them, gents. It's so much better.
A vast majority of western women are not trustworthy enough to settle down with in a meaningful way, despite Alexander's diatribe panning the vapid glamorization of casual sex. To me this seems like a classic false dichotomy. On paper landing the idealistic, beneficent relationship with a woman would prove significantly more fulfilling at length, to the exclusion of other variables, but every man's story is unique and some men need to sew their wild oats in order to strike a balance. Men deserve to explore as much sexual freedom and "empowerment" as the very feminists who vilify them. Opining another point; a good measure of how a woman feels about you can be gleaned from how she discusses the prospect of child-rearing in relation to you. Often times if her answer is "I don't want kids", or "I'd rather adopt", she has a traditional post-modern "1 foot in, 1 foot out the door" mentality. Violence will become more less a byproduct of western society's incentivizing women to have no accountability. Granted some of this is a backlash to the antecedent ethos, partisan to the interests of powerful men. Had I any recommendation for folks reading this it would be that average to below average-looking men must become cold, calculated, self-serving emotional terrorists. Not the type of terrorism that lands you in prison, or slapped with a restraining order; a kind of emotional terrorism that inflicts poignant mental scars, chastening the most devout narcissists. Men in today's society cannot afford to express vulnerability, or loyalty at their own expense. It draws to thought the renowned Latin proverb "si vis pacem para bellum." - if one seeks peace, one must prepare for war. Nothing in life lasts forever. Let's not forget the a-word many women love to evoke: abuse. When are we going to open the conversation about the prevalence of blatantly abusive women in western society, with little to no recourse?
I agree brother, casual sex is not fun. I had only had one 1 night stand and it was not fun for me actually it was rather awkward.😅 I personally like one person committed to me only.
It's almost like people need to figure out why so many things were done the way they were back in the day before the sexual revolution effed up the social order. The point of dating is to find a good partner. Staying in the dating game for as long as possible and "playing the field" like it's your second job is just a good way to get hurt, empty, shallow, and alone. Don't date until you're ready, and when you do, get, and get the eff out. Then appreciate and show gratitude for what you have if you found something good.
I discovered your channel very recently and I'm still slowly navigating through your content. I sometimes have very serious disagreements with some of your points. But on this one i fully agree. I wish more guys heard this message : "That emptiness that he felt inside himself, that void.... That wasn't caused by a lack of abundance of women. It was cause by trauma in his childhood. Feeling like he wasn't living up to his potential as a man. Deficiencies of self esteem that come from, you know, a thousand social interactions. To think that... you can solve this internal pain that you have, simply by having sex with women... is just delusional. It does not work like that. " With more and more men being brought up by single parents, the void you're talking about is becoming a very frequent symptom in modern men's psychee. And the men who are concerned by this void NEED to hear this. It is salvatory to become conscious of this. I lost many years behaving in this delusional way. I realized the emptiness of it a long time ago now and chnaged my behavior drastically. But so many of my friends are still stuck in this delusion. You're the first RU-vidr I hear verbalize this as clearly and I kindly ask you, for the sake of modern men, to talk about this again in the future, maybe even develop it further.... so more people hear it. Congratulations for your work. It is worth the time spent listening.
hey.. omg u just Word by word said what I was feeling towards Alexander Grace. n i am on the same boat as u that i strongly disagree with some of his content:"just ignor women to get them to respect u" "just make them feel uncomforable when u first meet them, do not compliment on them but make them feel insecure" those are his early contents. it seems that he has had a lot of internal growth last 1-2 yrs. Its refreshing. And he is trying to lead other men to the Next Level since he has had major milestones. He spoke utter 100% of my ex husband. he lived in his "idea" spent entire relationship sulking for being tied down. till he n i divorced, he was in shock n root of wakening for 10 yrs how MUCH he had was rare. That most ASIAN women in North America are NOT attractive(they are heavily mixed with Thai/viet/flipino indonesian/cambodian). much shorter n stockier . I was one just typical pretty girl , grew upp try to be a good person. but i was NOT bad ass enough like the guys wants a Party chick that is Agressive, bitchy, loud self serving seductive and enjoying getting mens' endles attention. I was seen as weak when literally i was fashionable, smart very caring person. D DUDE got burned so hard once divorce was final. I got featured by dating site (not my choice , the site owner liked my profile prob promoted my profile to get men to sign up premium packages). I had lik 100+ ppl try to msg me in 1 day,,,n 300 ppl sending me likes...n all sorts crazy. by talkign to diff ppl over time, i learn more of others also more of myself. n so happy i got out of it to this date. The grass WAS greener on the other side of fence. HAHAH.... the dude. spent 10 yrs kept getting burned. n he finallly luckily got a person came from exact home town from me,,,same hight, almost same face. ITs commical utter commical. LOL.... i always find it LOL... "if i noticed it, all yr siblings, n friends noticed , u will have to live with that deep rooted shame n sadness for rest of life, cuz no second chance for things."
Been looking for a way out of the dateing market since highschool, I've still been stuck here all my life. The problem isn't necessary guys not wanting out, but a lack of quality women that aren't just looking way above their own level.
The only thing worse than being the guy no woman pays attention to is becoming the guy most women want and then having to deal with them and the law. True story.
You can understand women or you can love them, but it's near impossible to do both. The mental gymnastics to do both is not worth the risk of losing half of what you own.
Okay. This guy is telling the truth. After my second marriage broke up (I was 36) I got angry at ALL women. I decided I would get back. So I started to "play" I moved to DC where the ratio of women to men is 10:1. I had two or three "dates" a week for two years. Most of them were sex on the first date and dropped them like a rock...I wounded a LOT of quality women in that process. But I was mad, remember. At the end of that quantity I had nothing...I kept none of them. I had a fading memory of faces and personalities and broken hearts that I had made while acting out. I moved out of the area and stopped the behavior. I lived alone for ten years after that...only dating occasionally and could barely form any kind of emotional bond with anyone due to how hardened I became...no one could get close. Finally, that wore off and I met a woman that was different. She was what some call "a man's woman". She was strong, and intelligent, and solid and she restored me by example. Yes. She was a career woman (succeeding at the highest corporate levels in a man's world). And yes, she was NOT a feminist type...But though I never expected it, and though I just got dumb lucky, I ended up finding a soulmate...a woman that is more intelligent than me, yet laughs at all my jokes. I have never said "I love you" to anyone, but with her, it doesn't require saying...it just is....
So true. Actually, I've learnt a key truth. Nice, meaning, good, decent, non-brutish men are actually high quality men and they therefore should only target high quality women.
Thank you for this video. Unfortunately, I watched it too late as I'm one of the idiots who lost a perfect, beautiful and loving woman to my own greed and unreasonable desires. I resented her and it reflected in the way I treated her. All she wanted to do was contribute to our relationship, support me and grow old together. But I screwed that all up and went through the separation at the worst possible time... at the very beginning of quarantine! All you young cats out there (and even you older, married in a happy relationship dudes), please learn from our experiences. Don't fk it up! And also, watch your thoughts!!! Because they can manifest into reality QUICKLY if you're thinking of acting upon the women out there, thus causing a negative affect in your current relationship with a beautiful (inside and out) woman. At least I know that I can be loved (although I don't currently feel worthy of it). This shows a light at the end of the tunnel. It's a faint light, but it's there. I hope some of y'all learn from my dumbass and I hope this helps.
@lloyd99984 Wishing you the best in your decisions, luck and journey. Like I said in my comment, "watch your thoughts"! I forgot to mention that I was with my ex for about 7 years. It's a huge loss for me. And not a DAY goes by that I don't feel the guilt or pain. None of these other women could hold a candle! My time, experiences and memories with her can never be replaced, as nothing really compares.
@lloyd99984 dude, you’re playing with fire bro. Better to try and be honest with how you feel with your SO, but you have to be willing to risk it all. Once she finds out, she could black ball forever bro. Instead of trying to sneak around, trying owning how you feel and come up with a solution without being dishonest. This is what strong men do! She may empathize with how you feel…
Most married men will tell you marriage is not worth it either, if they are being completely honest. A lot of ''happy'' married men, are just trying to convince themselves they are happy, you can see it in their soulless eyes. Even if you find a genuinely happy family, there is no guarantee it will not fall apart in couple of years, when a Chad set an eye on your woman. Even if you think you have found a high quality woman, there is no way to know for sure. Women are natural born actresses, and we men are gullible AF. 50% of marriage end in divorce anyway. Marriage is perhaps the most import decision you are going to make in your life. Will you use a parachute that has 50% fail rate at best to jump out of an airplane?
Lot of truth in your comment but I disagree with actresses- you have seen women in the west i believe and yes I would agree as Im myself flabbergasted with their rudeness and entitlement but those who are raised well in the eastern cultures are different. I personally for eg. like to walk behind or beside my guy and not just march ahead just because I want to respect that way but my person used to be irritated with it and always complained that i am dependent (i am a phd and been the responsible child in the family- so no i am not but i like to give the man a say, want to take opinions, like good back and forths, want to be included intellectually as an individual). Anyway marriage is hard- single life becomes lonely but its more peaceful, I generally am taken advantage of and slowly taken for granted for the niceness and now I dont even care and doubt myself if i really am nice for the right reasons and if its worth it to be polite and kind. Guess relationships did some serious damage to my stable nature and I dont feel like giving anymore. Its all a mirage. And yes marriages are hard work and both men and women feel its not worth it.
@@hashh2019 All I'm saying, if a woman wants to deceive a man, he would not be able to see it thru. A woman will manipulate a man if she sees him as a beta provider and there is something she can gain from him - but if she's truly in love she will not do such things, and usually get played herself, because she can only love someone who is in high demand, and of course he will not care because he has plenty of options.
Really wish therapy was the first thing thought of by people with deep rooted unresolved childhood trauma. Unfortunate to see someone sabotage their own life and success on a whim.
wining: 1 when a woman does NOT find me attractive -- it does NOT mean i am attractive IN general. He might have sepcific liking " certain nose, certain diet, certain looks. I dont fit in that liking doesnt mean I am Unattractive, just like men like curvy or chulby, other men like thin n toned. Some like tall model, some like petite. some like blond, some find it too pale. its same for men. JUST because 2 women are both 6-7 for their looks, 1 can find d guy extremely attractive, when another find the guy utterly not her type. It can just be "I am NOT her type, I just need to find the woman thinks I am her TYPE"" it is Majority the "TYPE " thing not, ATTRACTIVE enough thing. ps. the party body things are very hallow. women as we gt mature , the hot CHAT party boy thing gets old n boring so fast pass 26. We quickly snatch the Good dude that is actually treating us right n build on that. All the happiest ppl i know these days are the ones actually rised above n found the one accpet who they are"including their own childhood trauma". n support them n grow together. They are unbelievably happy. The unhappy ppl out there,,,have delusion that if they F*ck n played more. the Meant TO BE person would have show up in the mix. they dont have happy relationshp/marriage cuz the "meant to be" was nevr met . they wish they have Played, n messed with more ppl. n with that mind set, they blame on others, they can never grow to be cappable of hving sustainable long term relaionship.
These so called "low trash quality women" are the ones I want they have character I judge a woman by the content of her character rather than looks. Looks are good for the magazine not for partnership
This vid reminds me of that channel "The Natural Lifestyles"... Absolute grifters who claim casual sex with strangers is the goal & living in a tattered old country house in Portugal with a bunch of other men is a win.
I like this channel :) Personally, I've always found the game not worth the prize (especially if you're average or below average like me). Pretend to be someone you are not, work on something that doesn't interest you to be more masculine, especially for a woman. Thank you it's not worth the effort
There was clearly something (or a lot of things?) wrong in his relationship with his wife otherwise he wouldn't want to leave. I think him blaming the dating coaches for coercing him into dating again is a cop out for not being able to fix his relationship problems.
Same here, after the ex wife left a couple of years ago I told myself never again and honestly once you truly let go of that feeling of need or want for women the amount of stress that has been lifted is crazy. I've literally never felt more free and while I sometimes miss the old connection I had with her honestly the idea of giving this up now to go back to something like that isn't so appealing.
@@broke123 Thanks for that input, yours is a REAAL valid variant of the "The Juice is not worth the squeeze". Hopefully you are able to mentally not picture the bad times and just move on, move ahead (I never had a LTR and the possibilities I had and messed up, I keep replaying the bad in my head, lets all collectively as men support to NOT do what I did.)
I'm telling you man, you have to come to a place where you can enjoy the single life while still sourcing leads, playing the numbers game, and pursuing women when convenient and you have nothing better to do. It's hard to get there but eventually you get to a place where you become numb how toxic dealing with women is. That said, never go out of your way for women, spend a bunch of time/money on them, or plan around them actually showing up. They'll never go out of their way for you. the reason to do this is because actually actively pursuing women and running volume increases our chances of success dramatically. Up to you of course, but it's some food for thought
Isn't this video a bit of a cope though...? I mean, as much as i aspire to a long lasting, fulfilling relationship, a period of slaying first doesn't seem bad either...
I'm 30. And after years of rejection I've come to believe that it's not true that "You've got nothing to lose". I'm not afraid of rejection. But I'm afraid of who I have become because of it. Now instead of dreaming of meeting "the one" I dream of coming to terms with a life of solitude. I want to live alone in the forest somewhere and be a hermit. I want to enjoy nature, great literature, good food and music. And I'm just going to live my life. If I meet someone who doesn't beat me down great. But I definitely don't expect that.
The problem is that men have been conditioned to believe they NEED a woman to have a fulfilled life. Its actually women who need men for that not the other way round.
Read Iron John by Robert Bly. Women are a pleasant distraction from men’s purpose, not the goal or reward. Stop focussing on women, they’re not the answer.
It’s funny cause I live in the exact situation you talked about at the beginning. I am married, have two daughters, and have felt before that I missed out on being a “player” or whatever because I got married so young. After watching videos like yours and others showing how the dating market is currently, it’s caused me to re-evaluate my life and what I have. I’m so grateful for my wife and girls. I’m super lucky to be in the position I’m at. What I have is extremely rare in today’s world. I have a beautiful wife who’s only ever been with me and we are raising two amazing girls together. I think I’ve realized I’ve reached the peak of what you can as a man. It’s amazing to have a woman in your life who desires you. But this also means I don’t stop trying. A relationship takes a ton of work. I’m continuing working on myself and keeping myself in a position where my wife wants to keep us together. Anyway I’m glad I’ve found your channel. I’ve learned a lot from you.
A man who realizes his blessings is twice blessed! Your wife is a lucky woman and your girls will have the foundation of growing up in a secure and loving family. So happy you shared.
We actually met in college back on 2009. So a whole different dating market back then. Also both of us grew up Mormon, which if you know anything about them they’re all about not having sex til you’re married, which usually leads many to get married young. Currently we both don’t follow that religion anymore because we don’t believe or agree with a lot of its teachings but I do think the focus on chastity as a younger individual can probably be a good thing in the long run. I think they do take it a bit over the top in some cases and cause anxiety with many youth but the generality of it could be good. So yeah in a way I’m resentful of how I was brought up but also grateful for it. And in the end it’s led to what I have now.
@@PGateBaseball trust the results you have now are a blessing, may your marriage prosper further. Dating is a strenuous exercise and sometimes after achieving what you are looking for you ask yourself if it's worth the effort. It's only good if it doesn't eat much of your energy, time, resources and state of mind.
The most disgusting thing I've learned about dating women from dating is women don't care about your struggles or personhood. Once I learned this I didn't care if they were attracted to me, I just lost so much respect and desire.
As a former member of the "top tier men" I can confirm that what he says at 4:14 is 100% true. At the end of the day, it's not worth it. It's a fracking train wreck
Absolutely. It feels good in the moment, but shortly after, there's no substance in it. And when you realize that the majority of them, you likely wouldn't date, it really hits then. But the thing is, the more you do it, the more "addicted" you sort of get to it and want to do so. And the more you do that, the more at risk you put your future. If you ever end up in this position, it's probably best to exit it while you're ahead. I justified a bit of it by saying that most women I've been with, I actually developed a good friendship with. But even then, the casual stuff just doesn't go anywhere. It feels empty after a while.
@@BeastMode-oz8qc Yup, there's nothing worse than a phone call or text message saying "We need to talk" or "I have something to tell you" from someone you would not date 😂. Your mind immediately goes, "my life is over" haha. I laugh, but it's reality a lot of times. I've seen guys lives get wrecked because they got the wrong woman pregnant. Damn I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. Best to get snipped if you're going to keep doing it. Otherwise, too risky.
@@fenyx2558 it sounds like they got into a high paying job, achieved all their finanical goals and then hated the stress that they may have got from that job and then knew if they could save enough money to try and change into a job that they enjoy, even if they have now gone down the road where there is less of the financial reward?
"High quality women don't have one night stands" I'm pretty sure 90% of women has at least had a couple of them. Makes it really hard to find a gf if you're going to exclude all of them
Women enjoy sex as much as men. Most of us have had one night stands at one time or other. As we mature we move on from this behaviour. I think it is a question of how many and if the woman continues with this sort of behaviour into her late twenties when she should be settling into long term relationships. If you are looking for a Virgin in Western Societies then you might have more success finding a unicorn.
Attraction between men and women is asymmetrical. Women wants a guy who is always better than them. Taller, more social standing, financially sound, in shape and has game. While men looks submissive, feminine, young, good looking and slender women.
@Miguel Alves go to different country where women are shorter and you'll have foreigner effect going for you, maximize rest of the things that'll make attractive. You re Latino, if I'm not wrong. What about south America things not good for you there either...
When men start having some standards and chads stop settling for landwhales, we'll start to see an improvement in this huge disparity in the dating scene. Until then, I'm afraid things will only become worse.
Especially with the obesity crisis in western countries. No joke, a guy needs to travel to other countries it’s really eye opening when literally every woman in site is very attractive. It opens up so many more options.
@@charliedallachie3539 I think that's 1 of the top 2 reasons why dating is so hard for men in the West: a woman is in the top 30-40% simply by not being fat. So many women are fat and guys get so lonely that they give up and accept the fat women, because they don't have much of a choice! And so then the not-fat women value themselves higher just because they aren't fat, and fat women believe they're attractive when they just aren't. So, in the end, if you have standards you don't have many options.
@@jamesrussell2936 yea I had the opportunity a few years ago to travel over for a friends wedding in Poland and it’s legit attractive women literally everywhere you turn even at the mall….you stand out being an overweight dude if you are. I had only had a 2 weeks to spend there. Stopped by London on the way and it’s pretty much like NYC just more expensive. Definitely travel if you can. Tinder women were booming then overseas too I didn’t do it because I was on a short timeline.
@@BHBalast sure but less so than here in the US. Also they’re more easy to talk to, you can strike a conversation with them easier if they know English well which a lot do. In the US women will have this “why are you talking to me” vibe often (even if you’re decent looking) unless you’re asking for directions or the time.
Completely agreed. I am one of the men who lost 'a very high-quality woman' to pay my sexual debt, that too after 6 years of fulfilling relationship. I used to think that she is preventing me from fulfilling my desires. What an idiot I was. Nothing is more satisfactory than lying close to a woman whom you love and who also loves you back in the same way after a very satisfying sex. Sex without love is so shallow. It's the love in the partner's eyes during sex that gives real sex-satisfaction.
I suggest more domination and in a fun friendly way. Set a better frame or don’t go on the date. I’m NOT chastising you or your share. Your a real dude, doing real dates. But what I said is truth. Don’t go on the date, if your not going to dominate the frame and enjoy that dominating.
@@Alexandratheberge I agree. Learning the rules of the game from them is a necessity if you didnt have men in your live growing up who showed you how to deal with women.
@@elonever.2.071For me the usefulness of those dating channels is basically about efficiency and not wasting you're time and energy.And also about showing guys that approaching the cute girl at the library and asking her out really isn't such a big deal! I don't know why would anyone read any further into this?
@@Alexandratheberge I agree with what you're saying completely friend. I think a man today has to get in a mindset where he can accept that 1) the single life is obviously shittier than a relationship with a respectable woman (which is the motivation not to just give up) 2) it takes time to find that awesome girl 3) while you're looking for that awesome girl, you have to learn to ENJOY BEING SINGLE or the anxiety will destroy you 4) you have to play the numbers and that means chasing every lead because it dramatically increases the chances of finding a woman that's worth and interested in the long haul; having every dating app despite how terrible and miserable they are for men, taking chances in your social circle/employment with girls that reciprocate interest, and chatting up and flirting with girls when you're out with friends, at the store, etc, 5) not every relationship with a seemingly or actually good girl is going to work out, and we have to exit these relationships looking back objectively to learn about ourselves what led it to failure in the first place and be better next time and finally 6) absorb all of the information from the "manosphere" (alexander grace, fresh & fit, Aaron Clarey, The Rational Male, etc) and come to our own conclusions as to what works and makes sense to us. I've come to the conclusion thats just the best chance we've got.
@@quill6408 I see your'e passionate about the subject so i will discuss a few ideas about it with you. I agree with you that you have to play the numbers game with everything at your disposal. And figure out what works best for us. As for my own experience i tried dating sites (which i hated for the same reason Alexander explained)and dating phone lines which was a lot of fun but took extraordinarily long to find a girl that was GF material and was also attracted to me. But for me By far the best way to find a girl i liked was the public pick up( street, school, the mall,pharmacy.library).Its also the hardest because it is quite scary to do for most guys including me to do this! I would like to go on talking about my experience about what i learned about street pick up and everything else if you are interested.And also listen an learn from youre experience and learned wisdom if you like ?
The purpose of the dating market is to find someone and get the F out. So true. I'm happily married for 7 years and me and my wife agree that dating is a nightmare and we aren't going back to all of that nonsense. Find someone that is good to you and you're a winner.
How to find one though? Especially, when you feel behind and missed out in a lot of things. I know dating market is brutal for men. However, in order to find the one for me I still have to date.
@@flow1465 Quantity. My wife and I met through online dating. You message 100 people to get 10 dates to find 1 that is maybe worth a second date. You have to meet lots of people to find one that is a good match. I liked it that she approached me because she liked the picture in my profile. That's how it starts.
Well you are the extreme minority of happily married men, literally everyone I have ever met in real life, has told me they regret getting married. And that they are ONLY happy due to their children. That doesn't sound like a great deal to me honestly
@@FirstLast-gk6lg Marriage is not for everyone. Some people lack self-awareness and get themselves into situations they later regret. I didn't get married until I was 37. By that point I had figured some stuff out. Getting bitter and resentful after a relationship fails decreases one's attractiveness. Alexander is right on. Choose the one that chooses you. Don't chase. Get a pre-nup. I know I am very lucky - gratitude every day. Sometimes when you don't get what you want, you end up with something better.
I've had my fair share of casual sex. I have also had the great fortune of making love. I've only had one woman in my life so far that I have made love with. Unfortunately, we are no longer together. Let me tell you, I would trade all the casual sex in the world to make love again. Once you've made love, casual sex is practically meaningless. Great video Alex!
@@Genevasplaytime More and more couples are having 3 some and are swinging too. Never ever get married, the grass is never greener on the other side. Lots of sexless marriages.
A guy I know, 27, got out of a 8 year relationship because of the debt feeling. She was one of the few normal women left (fit, feminine, caring and loyal) and the older men who are married long term all said he made a mistake. The next girl he got was one with some mental issues who used him as therapist..
Bummer, hopefully he realised that and left her. (Just in case , it would be good if he make it back to the other, but not have him chase her nor anybody)
@@paulcolin9071 Possible. I've been back and forth with that also though I'm currently 29. My life has definitely been on the up the older I get and so have options. The thing is though, I think the longer you wait to settle in these current days, the less likely it'll be that you'll find a quality woman. I've met several woman that I could see myself with. Several of them are still good friends. Thing is, most of all of them were around my age. The ones that I would absolutely not settle with, have mostly been those a bit younger. Just a little joke (partially) here, but I'm seeing too much purple and pink hair these days in younger women. And I know first hand, that is NOT a good sign. I was with one casually for a bit and she had that youthful modern mentality. When I started caching feelings, I came to my senses pretty quickly and simmered them down because I knew there was no long-term potential. They are out there doing nasty things but are emotional wrecks. And lots of sex is a coping mechanism for many of them. (Obviously this was one experience, but there's something to it). My advice is to live it up as early on as you can if possible. And when you find someone of quality, at least consider locking her down. I don't think the dating market is improving anytime soon. If anything, it's on an exponential decline.
The only thing tougher than finding a good girl -finding an happy successful long term married couple. I know of *NONE* ALL of my friends got divorced - they ALL got drug though the divorce mill - they all had BS fabricated about them. Marriage in America - is simply not worth it. I grew up long ago - I saw the lies for what they were early.
Yeah, I pretty much gave up on the idea of marriage. As a man, there is just so much you have to bring to the table, you give up all your freedom, you put in all the effort, you get all the risk, but you get no guarantees and not very much out of it. I haven't met a single happy family in my life.
Also, whilst I agree with Alexander Grace and Jordan Peterson that guys in abundance should eventually choose, it's inherently better to choose from a perspective of abundance than scarcity, as it will a) give you access to higher quality choices and b)tip the relationship dynamic in your favour as you won't be coming from a perspective of neediness.
That is a thought I had some time ago, must dating sites and advisors preach / teach that mind set that there are women a plenty. but is is kinda a sham. Hear me out It is on point of what Alex states in this vid (and others of his) the women nowadays wants the 1% of guys so unless you are in that 1 % men top tier, that abundance mentality is skewed and glass half full without making you aware of the whole picture, HOWEVER IF you go into the current dating place with the scarcity mentality you are as you mentioned here, going to come of as needy and low class/game/quality, whatever (be it as it may intentionally or evidently) in your interactions with women, specially nowadays. Prepare for the best and the worst expect either, just stick with the process, do not fall into this dating market "Gaming" and constantly having to keep yourself into this market game. As Alex points out at 8:15.
No they shouldn't at least not marriage through the state. Until men and women can pre negotiate their own marriage contract as real equals it should be avoided. Having to maintain her life style upon separation even though you now have two residences? This is why so many men end up living in their cars upon divorce they get financially raped
@@JoseDiaz-rd9fh I haven't seen him mentioning marriage, so I'm not sure I understand this reply. I always operate on a non-marriage basis, unless it's specifically stated about marriage. Because marriages nowadays simply aren't viable. I'm assuming he means any sort of LTR.
The law in some country, like the US, is heavily biased against men. Plus the overall current dating atmosphere. Both of these incentivize women to be entitled. I wonder how much percentage of the "high quality" women do you think are there. Who is intelligent, reciprocate your contribution, don't "play" around, cooperative even without considering their age and look.
I agree. Feminism changed society to suit only women’s needs. We need more balance back in society. Young Men need more from society than they are getting.
Facts. I became a so called chad by working hard in gym and self improvement just to see how shallow and empty girls that chased me were and sex became very unsatysfying.
But what you are ignoring is that you now have an edge over the average guy in terms of options. Use this to get the best you can, then keep the chadiness with the chosen one so se keeps chasing you and getting on your program. This will lead you to a happy LTR.
@@agnjunio Facts! And Alex doesn't acknowledge this. The Chd not only finds and gets a higher quality women. But he keeps her, women are loyal when they feel like they don't have a complete hold over their man. When they feel that their man could get another girl as good or better than them, THEN they make the best partners. Alex is describing a Beta dude with no experience or prospects, if this guy gets married it will be to whatever chick looks his way and he will likely not be valued or treated well in the relationship.
So, casual sex is unfulfilling. After all these years, all this activism, all this "sexual revolution" and we end up right at the start: family values and Christian modesty. Amazing.
THis is bullshit. Only people who say that sex sucks is people that have it. LIsten i have never had it and i want it, so dont come to me and say it is no good. It's like an olympic gold medalist coming at me and saying "yeah it is no deal, i am not so happy" yet he worked to get it. It is very fulfilling, especially if you are very lonely and ugly. THe only people who don't like it are the ones who have a LOT of it.
@@brickgraims83 yep. Something I realised in highschool, only people who said having a girlfriend isn't worth were those who had no problem getting them and stayed getting them lol. Let me EXPERIENCE those things for MYSELF damn. Same deal with how "pusywhipped" I noticed friends, my dad, and other people get when it's put on them. I always wondered "damn, is it THAT good to make them act that way?" My dad would say all these negative things about women whilst being whipped at the same time smh. Still a mystery of how crazy pusy is that make folks act up.
@@brickgraims83 also same with people who like to preach that money mean nothing to them are those who have it in abundance lol. Like haha, yea, must be nice.
I totally agree. It’s like a shopping mall for them & an interview for men. We simply have to level up physically, financially & mentally. Then beat them in their own game by reversing it. Also have an abundant mindset like they do even though most of them ain’t sh*t
@@0bsmith0 imagine if guys only slept with and gave attention to women they would be willing to be in a relationship with. The women would be brought back down earth real quick
@@JamalW239 You can have an abundance mindset even if you don't actually have abundance, you just have to be able and willing to walk away at the first sign of bullshit or when the relationship is more trouble and anxiety than it's worth. Most men stick around for all of the bullshit and drama, and if women see that, they'll walk all over you
I think it's easier to become a 'player' on the dating market, than to find a high quality woman for a relationship nowadays. And if you don't have the option to be a player if you wanted to, it's also unlikely that a high quality woman will select you for a relationship. Woman want a guy that has A LOT of options, but chooses not to use them, but instead picks her. When you have a guy that isn't doing well at all in the dating market, aka most guys, you will find that he is going to try and settle for the first 'somewhat okayish' girl that gives an interest into him. And that girl also likely has a similar mindset of 'mehh this guy isn't as good-looking or rich as I wanted to, but I am tired of the dating market, let's just see where this goes'. Another issue is that most guys 'on the dating market' aren't even actually on the dating market. Those 2 dates they have per month with girls they had to basically convince to go out with them? Yeah that's not really being on the dating market. That is called fighting for scraps.
In reality as you get older post 40 etc just the scraps are left anyway. Finding a high quality mentally sound women that is available and into you less 1-5% if that.
Alex, you have just torn apart my deepest insecurities ever. I was in that trap of my pickup community. I have a lot of guy-friends who sleep around. I did it quite a lot too. But when I stopped they started saying that I'm not alpha anymore, I'm getting beta and so on. It worried me, I didn't want to loose my face with my friends, but I didn't wanna keep playing in the dating market. I felt quite uncomfortable about all of that. But after watching this video I got relaxed and calm. Finally! oh, this relief! Thank you Alex! You become my favorite person to watch on RU-vid.
I agree with Ashley, don't let another man tell you what being a man is. in my opinion sleeping around is just a threshold, different for all men, once you have slept with enough women you don't feel like you need to anymore. And in my opinion this is where a man STARTS seeing women truthfully.
I read "The Game" by Niel Strauss and thats been my impression- most players get ABSORBED by the process and addicted to external validation - its a trap bc now they've invested all their spare energy on playing - and - ended up with mostly nothing.
