My Dead Dad’s Porno Tapes | NYT Op-Docs 

I feel like we forget that our parents had lives before us.

My grandpa was abused by his father. My grandpa abused my dad which resulted in my dad losing hearing from both ears and paralyzing half of his face. My dad, only raised his hands towards us to hug us. Not only us, he stays kind and loving to everyone else around him too. He broke the cycle ❤️ I am proud of every parents making an effort to break the cycle Edit : holy moly!! thank you so much guys for blessing my hero dad with so much love. We all take care of him a lot (me, my mom and my sis). We make sure to give him extra love and support he deserved to get in his childhood years You guys are awesome ❤️

When you said "This was Greg trying...its just he kinda sucked at it." I smiled at the honesty

“you inherit your parents’ trauma but you will never fully understand it”

When his mother said that she and Greg decided together that "it ends here"... so wonderful. I cried.

Wow. It just hit me like a bolt of lightning, “I ended the cycle!” So maybe instead of wondering why my mother couldn’t love me, I will pat myself on the back a little. My kids tell me all the time how they appreciate the unconditional love I have for them and everything around me. They wonder where I got it. I broke the cycle because I never wanted my kids to feel how I felt growing up. 🥰

Shoutout to all the people out there breaking generational curses. ❤

This video is the definition of ‘don’t judge a book by its cover’. This is such a beautiful video

PTSD from childhood ruins families.

Thanks for reminding me of this while I still have time with my father. He grew up in an abusive home too. He tries his best not to let it escape his past and all I can do is honor his intentions. It means the world to me and I know he just wants to see me succeed. Thanks for the tears.

Parents in the making, pls don’t just have kids for the sake of it. Cptsd is real from our dysfunctional parents who refuse to face their own issues. HEAL FIRST FFS!

This made me cry. I'm 47 with a 4 year old daughter. My father is 76 and I'm scared that I could lose him at any time. I also worry that I won't be there for my daughter.

This resonates for me on many levels. Very moving and well presented, thank you.

Families can be such achingly bittersweet and beautifully tangled messes, of good yet flawed people trying to care and love for one another.

This resonated with me as well. Growing up, I have an overbearing mother (to the point where she would make a mountain out of a molehill and emasculate my submissive father whenever they fight) who you would call a drama queen. Then when I learned of all the trauma and suffering she had to endure from my paternal grandparents and sister-in-law, I understood where she was coming from. I understood why she was a nagger, because she endured constant berating and trampling upon by my grandmother who didn't approve of her for my father because she was their nanny. She had to endure sexual harrassment from my grandfather. I came to understood why she always blame my father for just about anything when they fight. For a time when I didn't knew everything about her struggles, I blamed her for why I grew up like this, why I have morbid thoughts, why I act this way and that, why I was constantly depressed. I partly blamed her (in my mind) why I was clinically diagnosed with bipolar disorder in 2015. When I learned of her struggles I came to see her in a new light. And now I love her more. I want to give her the best in life to the best of my abilities. I want to give her a forever home so they won't have to worry about old age, which she and my father dreamt of from the beginning because my paternal grandparents sold the last parcel of land they own to sustain their gambling addiction which they could have given to my parents as an inheritance but they were selfish so we had to constantly move from place to place, instead they left us with debts and bad memories. I want my mother to be proud of me and make happy memories with her moving forward so she could finally forget about the past and all the trauma she had to endure with my grandparents.

Are we just ignoring, that you see his sister eating a booger in the moment she says "you're not putting me in the movie"? xD classic sibling love

Way to go, Charlie. It is not an easy thing to look back through the veil of a lack and still see a full person. This a beautiful tribute to a man not fully known but full nonetheless.

Why am I watching this instead of studying

This was absolutely beautiful. It reminds me a bit of “Dear Zachary,” they’re both heart touching and they both provide such an intimate view on their subjects.

This is why I can't get close to my mom or sister. I've been abused and made fun of my whole life. All me and my dad wanted was for the cycle to end. Beautiful.

Perfect example of great, not cringy modern art. Thank you.

“You bring what you know to parenting”. With a heavy heart I applause to the end credits.

Charlie you would a made him proud. What he did by saying "It ends here" is so very difficult to do, I'm glad you'll never fully have to go thru what he did for you'all.

My father was a pilot in the air force and was on his third asian wife when he died. Hustler magazine was mailed monthly to him when we lived overseas. Sometimes your parents sexuality just creeps you out.

Totally clickbait... but totally worth it Good job.

This is so heart breaking, what an incredible piece of work.

Editing in photos for a split second was madness.

This made me cry. Really beautiful monument to all parents with some thought-provoking ideas about generational trauma. Well done.

A very intimate and poignant story. this a deep glimpse into a very personal thing. It was so honest and i am surprised your family was also so forth coming. Thank you for sharing.

This was such an artfully made film, my goodness.

"This ends here", my dad's mantra. His struggle to overcome took the joy out of parenting. I chose to not have children mostly because I saw little reward . . . Great piece of art; clickbait title or not.

This is the best video I have seen on RU-vid yet. Kudos to NYT, Charlie and especially Greg. May you rest in peace and have the best childhood possible in your next life.

This is something that my family struggled with through generations. That's why I have no kids. Hopefully the cycle stops with me.

I relate to this deeply. My dad died when I was 6 and I never really knew him because my parents divorced when I was 2. I just try and stitch together what I can. Pictures, other people's memories, his awards and clothes, some items from his hobbies, etc. It's weird to not know anything about someone who knew everything about you.

My dad found another lump in his neck yesterday (he's already in treatment)... just trying to hold it together 💔 This was oddly comforting.

I like that finally Charlie Tyrell was given credit. Seeing "Directed by. Charlie Tyrell"at the end of this video.

I feel you so much. I lost my dad when I was 17, and I never really had a good relationship with him when he was around. As a kid, I always thought negatively about him... He was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease and that was what ultimately took him. I couldn’t understand how I felt when he died, but all these memories of him came flooding back to me and I had the same realization as you. He tried his best to try and have a relationship with me, but he just was not very effective at it. I remember him trying to teach me how to drive, do basketball and all that but I was interested in doing other stuff as a teenage, and may have pushed him away. I remember having a somewhat decent relationship with him before I went to the big city for college and I recall him wishing me good luck and all that. We hugged, but I did not know then that that would be one of the last times I’d see him. Now that I’m older, I keep thinking that I could have a better relationship with him at this age than when I was younger because I think I kind of understand him more now. He tried and I did not see him as trying back then.

This made me cry. This incredibly well-made, beautifully shot, its editing intricate and clever, the narration bittersweet, and I am glad this video exists. I hope you are proud of what you have made.

6:22 "This was their house, a monument to a respectable brand of normalcy." - nicely expressed

In the future, the equivalent would be "finding my father's search history".

My dad was abused as a child. as I was growing up he took me to airports to spend time with me. Now thanks to him giving his all to raise me and my sister I am an airline pilot. Thank you for making this video, it reminds me of my dad so much.

such an amazing, gorgeous, heartfelt film

This is the kind of thing that runs through my head every time I have to repeat that I'm sure I never want children--if the way I was raised doesn't ruin them, then my fear of ruining them will. It ends here, for good.

I lost my father last year. Thankfully we had the chance to reconcile. I was able to care for him and clean him. My father was verbally abusive and very heavy handed. For me to humble myself and be so gentle handed with him during his vulnerable time allowed me to grow past the anger and confusion. May we both find piece. Conversations and time spent gives new perspective but does not close wounds per se. The skin has closed but scares remain. Scars I pray to avoid handing down to my own son. Let's do it for them. be blessed

My family doesnt even exist anymore; Im the last. Everyone and Everything is gone. Nice video.

"It ends here" That makes you think a lot about your parents and about future kids. Thank you.

Beautifully done. I lost my dad to Covid recently, and this really resonated with me. He didn’t manage to leave behind the scars and traditions of a violent upbringing as well, but I know that he tried. Thanks for sharing this.

I remember watching this when my father was still alive. Now I've come back after my father's death and I'm crying like a baby

Aww this was very moving. My parents attribute their bad parenting to their parents and I resent them for that. I will never have children.

I cried watching this. Incredibly moving, and very well made.

my grandfather was my favorite person ever. He always trusted me, and he was the only one to do it. My father didn't believed in me, neither my mother or my friends. It's always "eh, Lua's stuff huh" when i failed at something. My grandpa got me into music. I'm a musician. I play guitar, piano, violin, accordion, bass, cello, clarinet, flute, clavichord, and lute. I'm a luthier, and made some stuff. My parents told me it wouldn't give me any money, so i stopped going to music classes. My grandpa teached me to write. He made poems, and teached me to do it too. I made hundreds of poems, but none got even close to be as good as his. He always told me that he wanted to write like me. My grandpa once got a strange scar on his neck, and told me he removed a mole in there. One day, he called me, to go to the hospital with him, because he couldn't go alone. He had skin cancer. It was at its final stage, and he... didn't told me, nor my dad, nor his brothers and sisters. The last day i saw him.... he apologized for not saying anything. And i said that i always believed and trusted in him, and made him a poem right there. I have a son. I also have skin cancer. And i cant speak to my father, nor my mother, nor my son. And i... want to leave him something special. But I'm a no one.

Her asking her ashes to be mixed with his dad’s is so sweet, it’s the thing that made me cry lol

Sad, but also very hopeful. Abuse doesn't have to continue from generation to generation. Beautiful story.

This must have been such a cathartic project. This is actual, beautiful, art

I needed to watch this today. We humans are so complex, fascinating and vulnerable. Thank you so much Charlie!

Left me in tears . This is beautiful, every human being needs to watch this

Tried to use this to rekindle the relationship between my parents and I. It failed but was worth the attempt. Great video

This is one of the most heartfelt, poignant documentaries I've seen around here. So well done and creative.

I absolutely love how this was made. I thought it was just some wacky story about the children gettng grossed out by their father and nothing more, but this, just made me be in the shoes of one of them, searching for that answer, who was their father? Why? And ultimately it just left me so profoundly shocked by how well written it was. From the absurd title to something more than that. I love this.

I haven’t met my biological family in years because of abuse, and this is reminding me why that was a good decision.

Lovely story. Unfortunate title that may keep some away. Not that it bothered me but I could see other types overlooking it because of the poem reference. Keep it up Charlie!

Wow, this film hooks me like a fish. Yanks me to the surface and flops me into the fisherman boat as I realize how honest and similar this story is to mine!! Please throw me back in the water.

I cried basically all the way through the video because it reminds me a lot of my family. It's treated with so much affection and care. Tastefully and beautifully done. Thank you for making this.

Whenever I need to make a short video for my class projects, I always come and re-watch this because the design is stunning. It's a good reference for a simple style, and if needs to go a little extra you can definitely just add another style on top of it. Lovely docu.

Wow. I see so much of my own relationship with my father in this: the airless, seemingly unbridgeable distance between us that persists into my 30s and his 70s, my attempts to understand and account for the numerous small ways we drifted apart, and in my case, the slowly fading hope that we will ever find middle ground, a common cause, that we can slowly work towards before our time on this earth is both spent. This is what the Internet should be for. Well done. I'm proud to be a (newish! I've watched about 10 of these already just this morning!) subscriber.

This is one the most amazing things I've seen in years, thank you Charlie Tyrell

Gosh I cried so hard. This is truly a moving art piece. Overflowing with so many emotions.

This was touching. I'm glad you took the time to delve into it...hopefully you got closure as well. Nice job Charlie!

Amazing work!

So beautiful! And very well done! Just wish it didn't have the clickbaity title.

i appreciate how much care was put into this presentation,i'm sure he would have loved this

Kudos to the animator/videomaker! Love the flat lay concept!

So sad :(

Although the title threw me for months, I finally became curious enough to watch, and I'm so glad I did because this short turned out to be the ABSOLUTE finest I've viewed to date on this platform. Believe me: I've seen a couple hundred over the past few years. Poignant, provocative and deeply insightful...you won't be disappointed.

I don’t understand why this doesn’t have more views it’s really well done. And is an eye opener! Love your parents whilst you can.

What a beautiful beautiful video, and the editing is amazing. Shed a tear at the end. A very comfortable tear

I’m not crying, you’re crying...

this never fails to make me cry. thank you so so much for making this charlie

This was beautiful. Incredible job, Charlie Tyrell.

I cried right in the beggining, until the end! Well done sir! A very emotional piece of art!

This reminds me of my dad who died in 2012, I wish I knew at that time what he had gone through and was a bit more sensitive/appreciative to him instead of thinking that he was just a strict meanie.

Loved the video ! Thanks for sharing that about your family & father in particular. Break the cycle. That is a strong message.

The family rules are as follow: Don't talk, Don't feel, Don't trust! Or just run for your life.

This really helped me understand my father. The way he treated us kids, the way he functions and only does things his own way. He too grew up in a dysfunctional family, but he tries. I now understand him. Thanks Charlie.

Love how you ended this! This was very fascinating.

Beautiful, touching and painful. Parenting is a complicated and deep place. Grateful the Tyrells were able to archive so much in video, audio, and testimonials. Well done, music and all!

Thank you so much for this film! "It ends here"...I know what that feels like. Your story helps me a lot.

Just incredible, touching, so full of emotion, and the end is like a subtleau. Charlie Tyrell!

Your editing and story telling is insane, excellent work.

That's the thing about parents, you think they're bad until you learn what their parents did. The least you can do is appreciate how much they try.

I saw this a couple of years ago. I am so excited to see this in my feed. Thank you so much. Very moving.

Beautiful. Thank you for sharing this with us.

this was amazing and by the end i had tears running down my face. thank you for sharing!

Those NYT essays are some of the best stuff on here, so much love, creativity, and effort. Just amazing storytelling.

This story was portrayed in such a beautiful way! This was such a personal video to watch

Very beautiful story. Makes me appreciate the fact that I still have my parents with me. Both of my parents grew up in dysfunctional families and for the most part they broke the cycle of abuse. Our family is dysfunctional in it's own right, but growing up we knew we were loved and well taken care of.

I always feel once someone is dead we hold their memory in a perfect fog if one recalls a "negative" story or personality traits they are a bad person yet in reality we all have our not so lovable quirks and on occasion some more than others 😆act out!! To whitewash all people's "flaws" and perceived mistakes is stupid !! it's very unlikely anyone's dad is a "angelic" perfect citizen and how can you're remember a lost loved one properly when you ignore anything not picture perfect!!! This is fantastic! This is also pretty brave !! THIS IS BEAUTIFUL ❤️

I lost my dad this year and I found this very meaningful

I wasn't expecting this beautiful story. It made me cry happy tears. I am happyy that, with all his mistakes, it stopped there. And I am happy that you found a way to understand and truly forgive your father. The sentence "this was my dad trying" is so meaningful. It has the power to change lives. Thank you for creating this beauty.

Tragically beautiful ... yet sooooo incredibly sad, and surely only 1 of countless others throughout the world. :( ~South Africa~ xox