My Journey As A Childfree Woman 

More and more people are finding growing childfree communities and it’s such a beautiful space where we can meet others and just feel heard!

I'm so glad that there's childfree channels on RU-vid 🙂

@@angelaholmes8888 Agreed! ☺️💛

I doubt childfree women will ever be normalized. But I am happy that childfree women are speaking out and are able to connect. ❣

@@doloresvangaal2248 It's a rather big hope but sadly I also see the reality that it may never happen too. Im thankful as well though that it's being voiced more so we aren't at least in the dark with our choice and can feel openly proud of it!

This should be put on a shirt! So well said and true! I imagine the world would be full of well rounded individuals if so.

It can happen to men but I find not as often or as forcefully.

​@@diaryofthechildfreeYeah, as a Childfree man I only get the occassional "Why don't you want kids?" from miserable middle aged guys time to time. It does not compare to the flack women get online and irl though. We got an entire echo chamber of men young or old just vilifying women for being women. Its like leave people alone, christ. Just live and let live.

​@@Pleebian94they go crazy about females.these horny arses

Thank you so much, that really means a lot! I love hearing from those who have experienced childfree life for longer, know the experiences and of course the benefits! I’m so happy you continuing to live and love your life! ❤️❤️❤️

Awesome! This right here is the sentiment i hear from the vast majority of long-term childfree people/couples...not a bunch of "regrets" like the masses say you'll hear.

Yes! 🙌 Bloodlines are so strange like sure it’s great and all but we aren’t really that special either. 😂 I’m secretly jealous! A bunch of Childfree cousins sounds like a party!

Yes, exactly and so well stated! 👏👏👏

Yes! 🙌 Sometimes it takes an outside perspective to undo all the “shoulds” we’ve been told in life!

Very good point! Nobody is owed an explanation!

When you look back it’s almost like well duh it’s a choice but it just goes to show how influential the world around us can be! So happy to be here too! ❤️✨

I’m ready for the next person to ask us so I can tell them my husband got snipped as extra insurance! 😂

Amen! So true!

I've seen people saying that line to 90+ yo Childfree people...

Same here! Everyone on our street has children and my husband and I happily walk around with our dogs! 🙌🐶🐶

It’s just so hard to wrap your mind around! To me I don’t see the process, complications and ultimately the worst pain you’ll ever feel to be worth it. There is content with staying as far away from pregnancy as possible! 😂 I’m so happy you’ve been living your best life!

It’s so hard not knowing anything other than that specific way of life! Hahaha I’ve had that said to me before too and had the exact same thought! 😂 It’s the “joke” that just gets funnier because the more they say that stuff the more we don’t want kids! 😆

I’m so sorry to hear about what you’ve been through. I hope you are healing.

If people want to talk about a huge weight being lifted off your shoulders; this realization is a prime example!

Yes even i felt a huge weight being lifted from me Specially overworking and earning in toxic environment

That's the best response to give! 👏 My husband has done that and quickly shut down any further words. 😂

Totally get this. My childhood was beyond stressful. Could not imagine more on my plate.😬😟

Oh my gosh! I don't blame you! That sounds like a chaotic upbringing and I'm sorry that was your experience! Chers to never putting a worry towards others thoughts! :D

@@JuliaShalomJordan people who've not had really traumatic childhoods wouldn't understand it. I don't tell anyone about it either. We have to enjoy our lives now and be grateful for it because many kids have it much worse.

@@govegan6112 They probably would not understand your childhood. I think we all have our reasons. As a black person I am not sure I want to bring another person into this world.

Same here. I’m worried that I won’t find a man who doesn’t want children.

When we know we know! Others may not understand but if we know it's the right choice for us thats all that matters!

1 out of 5 ppl now have only one child its growing i believe many of tgese ppl didnt think they had choice and just went through it to get it done. Sad thing is then many ive talked to were pressured to have a 2nd child but they drew the line and in a way its a bit of a protest as well

@@fmsstudio6316 - Is this worldwide? It is true some more educated countries starting to realize but many cultures and countries still pumping out babies. Most often religious. But institutions need constant flow of human capital so they keep people dumb intentionally on the subject.

@@INTERNATIONALvids i believe its in the u.s. so several countries in the world are experiencing population decline japan, sev. Euro countries. However globally its still growing if we are less nativist and allow for more migration we can stabilize the populations and not endure such enviornmental degradation.

Thank you for being so sensible.

@@fmsstudio6316 In last 200 years world population went from 1 billion to 8 billion. Too many humans makes humans cheap and replaceable. A child free revolution will sink world populations and force economic systems to reset from pyramids based on population growth to more sustainable population models.

Right? It’s always kids this or kids that! I remember my husbands grandpa once stating that one day I would have 6+ kids. 😳 No thanks! I’m similar as well! I just wanted to do well in school! My goals were just set on success for a good future and life. 😅 That’s always tough! Family stuff definitely changes once nieces and nephews come into play! I’m so excited for your move though and one I’m sure that comes happily without the stress of children!

@@diaryofthechildfree BIL wants 6 kids and one day he came trying to convince my sister to accept, he thought that if we agreed (my sister's family 🙄) with him my sister would have 6 pregnancies, me a childfree? No, totally unacceptable I told him "not your body not your choice", my sister wants 2, my mom agreed with my sister, my sister knows that they can't afford more children, they have 1 son an a coming baby (?), so I would ask to my sister if she is going to get her tubes tied because I know he is going to try to make her be pregnant again when she is going to be 40 in a few years.

@@wmarch88 Oh man, that is way too many! I really hope she does get her tubes tied because if he seems adamant about 6 kids, he will likely try to find a way. Just one seems hardly feasible in todays world and you know she would likely have to bare most of the responsibility in raising them too! I think that’s what erks me the most between people who choose to have kids. Some relationships are great, but so many consist of a partner who really wanted all these kids but then becomes absent for the majority of what’s involved!

@@diaryofthechildfree Sorry this is too long 😅 My country has a very big problem, many man only saw us as machines for having babies, because a very machista way is as more children you have more macho man you are, not all, but the assholes, more if they are religious, I think BIL is like them, he showed a lot of machistas ideologies, laughing when a video show a man rudely shut up a woman because as a man he knows more, something that bother my younger sister and me, we were raised to be independent and successful, yes there are many things that my mom teach us, once where my sister was 9 months pregnant, I hear something on the kitchen at 3 am, I thought my sister was hungry because she was cooking, no she did it for BIL I told her "if is his food he has to cook, you are too pregnant for waking up", my mom told me "is her husband she has to cook", he doesn't know how to boil water. I don't see me on a relationship because a man is going to have the thigs easily, don't worry about anything, don't do chores, forgetting to pay bills because women didn't remember him to do it, that happened to my sister when they have the power cut off, and the women saying "man are man, you can't think they are going to do something if you don't ask or remember him to do it", and yes not being a father more than the name, my father, my cousins fathers, all are absent, they didn't raise us, they were there but not there at all for us, BIL is the same. Here religious people are against contraception pills, "because it make you promiscuous", some more fanatic are against talking about sex on schools to prevent pregnancies on teenagers, BIL was part of a church when women had all the kids that god sends🙄🙄, they try to push my sister to think to have all the kids BIL wants, she quit this church because was too much as "women equal slaves of man desires" (on my personal perspective), thanks to covid she said "I can't I have a baby", my nephew born 3 month before covid, they agreed with her because children are first, she didn't say it but I know she hated that church. I'm atheist so I hate religion. Religion only makes the thing worst for us here, for years therapeutic abortions where only if the life of the woman was on risk, no for other medical options, on 2019 the president against all the religious protests signed a law to make therapeutic abortion legal because there were many marches, protests and even lawsuits to stop forcing women to give birth to dead fetuses, yes, dead, many had unviable pregnancies but because their lives were not in danger they had to carry them to term, religious people thing that combined contraceptive methods plus abortions will make women more promiscuous. Even my family, the older members, was against because "they are killing babies", me and my younger sister talked about who good is to stop cruelty on those poor women, my mom was mad. On one occasion my older sister and I almost fought because she is totally against using misoprostol for abortion. Religion is so involved in politics that in the previous elections there was a presidential candidate who as a proposal who said that he would ban all types of abortion and unless the woman was dying it could be performed (when all we know it is too late), he lost, but he will come back, and many people agreed with him, "ban abortions save lives" they said. We know they can't because is totally ilegal by law to ban abortions, the consequences are too high to do the things as they want, I see this politician wanting to become my country as Gilead, "ban women rights" it's not something he said, but with everything he's said it's implied, more because there's always some idiot saying "women shouldn't go to college because it makes them no longer want kids and they think they have the same rights as men". He wouldn't win because he is dangerous and many people know that.

@@wmarch88 I’m so sorry that you have to deal with that! I can’t stand that outdated way of thinking. I feel like more so nowadays motherhood is used more so as a way to control women because it makes it 10x easier. Obviously I can’t make this statement about everyone out there, but a lot of people who share that way of thinking show similarities. Your poor sister. While men in part play a role in how they treat women I feel like it also has to do with how they are raised both by their family and society because it’s a little all to common across the board! So many men just want another “mother” in a sense. Someone to cook for them, care for them, be their walking talking calendar, just essentially be a personal maid that does it all. It’s always like that though, they wannnt the children but then are never around to help raise them after birth much if at all. Religion in terms of determining what one should or shouldn’t do with their bodies shouldn’t be allowed or at least enforced. It’s infuriating to see the happen here in the US and I can’t imagine a place where it has a stronger presence. Everything (for the most part) should be left to choice and we shouldn’t judge anyone for what they choose to do with their own body that is there’s. Many of the things you stated that women are forced to do are cruel and just pro-long grief. Discussing women’s healthcare is so so so important! 👏 There is nothing provocative about it. Things are only sexualized if we make them that may but these are our bodies and everyone should understand how they work not just for good measures but overall health as well! I feel your fear with seeing how things can take a turn with political leaders. The state that I live in banned abortions at all stages recently. They allegedly made exceptions for life threatening medical conditions but women are coming forward stating that it’s hard to get a pass. It’s messed up because cases of rape and incest are not considered; it’s awful. It’s horrible to see things get passed like this because it is never done in the majorities favor and it gives too many of the wrong people ideas as well as the feeling of power to try and come back with more awful ideas.

YES! 🙌🎉 Thank you so much! Means a lot!

Thank you! Happy to have to here! ☺

That is awesome that your parents are very supportive! 🙌 Seeing it from an outsiders point of view can certainly put things into perspective in terms of parenthood! That has got to be such a rewarding feeling to be retired at 38 and setting 3 big back to back trips! Those are the things that I personally find as goals!

Where are you headed?

Your words are so true and inspiring; everything you wrote really resonated with me and I’m looking forward to navigating this life on my own terms! ❤️❤️❤️

I love this for you! I can imagine the stress that comes with your profession but also the fulfillment it brings as well! The level of relaxation in coming home to a calm space is almost euphoric!

Those are the two big ones! It just doesn’t make sense for the place we are in the world right now!

Preach! If it doesn't feel natural we definitely shouldn't be doing those things just for the sake of it! I feel like getting to the point and seeing those around us truly experience parenthood is a wakeup call especially seeing the nitty gritty. Once kids come into play, your life just goes down the drain! Cheers to living your best life! 🥂

It's such a bizarre concept, especially when you really think about it for a while. People are basically saying "how dare you take care of yourself" as if it's bad to want to look after your body, mind and spirit. If we don't care for ourselves and address our needs first, how else will we be able to thrive. For some it can be easy and for others it may not be, and sadly people just assume because they did something others should be more than capable when in reality we are all different and unique!

I'm so happy you figured it out a bit early on in life and haven't looked back since! YES! I'm all for continuing to live your best life because age doesn't define a single thing! I can't imagine having to deal with all of that after thinking your kids are good after 18. It's a never ending job!

I whole heartedly agree! I never understood why people try to convince others to have kids! Like, we know it isn’t for us and that we may not make the best of parents so why would someone try to convince us otherwise for a kid to maybe have a sh*tty life.

@@diaryofthechildfree exactly!! people who aren't completely on board with the commitment to rearing children should definitely not be doing so. else we continue this downward spiral in society as a whole. it's not fair to the person, nor fair to the kids.

@@EadsB7002 People can claim all the “what ifs” they want but at the end of the day a life is not worth gambling!

Life is so short as it is so we might as well live our best lives how we see fit and not as to what others do! 👏

🙌🙌🙌

Childfree people think about the difficulties of having children WAY more than parents. So many women have told me that they hadn't wa ted or planned on a third or fourth kid but they andctheir husband got drunk and didn't take care.

Exactly this, and unfortunately we will be the ones sitting with them while this all happens. the only difference is that thankfully being childfree we don't have to worry about children going through this and can focus on our own survival. It terrifies me to see these things already happening and people aren't truly noticing. I will! I have it noted!

@@diaryofthechildfree This was one of the reasons I became childfree. I truly believe that there are children who are seeing these things and questioning why their parents made the decision to bring them into the world. It's stressful see these things and brainstorming what actions should I take to secure my safety along with my parents and other family members because it isn't getting better.

@@TYINTOSPACE It's scary to see and notice! If we are feeling this way as adults I can't imagine the young adults, teens, kids, and younglings that are currently being brought into this state of the world. I know every parent has high hopes but it can also be naive knowing everything we know and what's predicted.

Thank you so much! I’m so happy to hear that you have been enjoying it! The backlash is hard but never let it steer you from whatever makes you and only you the happiest! This community is growing thankfully and my hope is that many people can seek guidance and “normalcy” from different lifestyle choices.

@@diaryofthechildfree Thank you so much for your kind words! It's very much appreciated. 🖤 I'm really loving this community already.

@@laurag4978 You’re welcome! 💛 I’m so happy you’re here and have a space to feel at home! ☺️

Yes! 👏 Always and forever! There should never be anything wrong with that!

It may not ever be, but we are getting there or at least to a better place compared to what it was! 🙌💛✨

I'm so sorry to hear this! Trauma is a hard thing to handle and often gets passed down. I recently have learned that studies are also done on how we can also carry our families trauma genetically. I am hopeful that these next generations are at least better in terms of obtaining the help they need.

Ending the cycle and being able to work on yourself, while a hard process, can also be rewarding. It's just not fair to bring kids into your life when you're still working on yourself you know> Too many of us have already face the outcomes of that.

@@diaryofthechildfree yeah so sadly true

I’m so with you on this.🤜🏼😬

It really is strange! Some people love to make other's business their business as well! It just makes sense that those who want kids have them, raise them with the love and care they deserve and those that don't, don't to avoid stressful outcomes for the parents but especially children. Thank you for being a CF supporter! ❤

@@diaryofthechildfree I’m making a video on this tomorrow!!

@@BurbNBougie Yes! I’ll keep my eyes open for when it’s posted so I can watch!

@@diaryofthechildfree I made two videos about CF ppl. Come on over

🙋👏🙌

I’m surprised they actually said that to you…but also not! Employers I’ve worked for in the past romanticize babies and families, yet the moment anyone was asking for time off for it etc that crap talk started. If the work life balance is already hard telling someone they should have a family only make it harder. I saw a great meme recently that talked about how the people who love to work are often just trying to escape their families and home life. So happy to hear you are happy with the decision and outcome of your life! 👏 Life is already too hard as it is!

I'm in the same boat, but never really wanted kids. Work was way too stressful and I just didn't have time or the bandwidth emotionally. He's also a man, not a woman, so he's not the one who typically is the primary caregiver of children. I think in most cases, the people who seem the most unable to reconcile why someone wouldn't want kids are men as they can't relate to the impact of mothering on women.

@@sparklesp9304 I can fully agree and feel the same way! I used to have a highly stressful job as well and coming home was just way too exhausting. Naturally, women just end up taking on the majority of caretaking as you said. There is no "I'm too tired" or "I worked all day" to complain about to get out of things.

Thank you so much for taking the time to watch! It’s so important not to rush major life changing decisions! I feel like a big issue is how passive people are on the idea as if having a child is something as simple as choosing what to wear in the morning! There is so much to consider with it that we should all be thinking very deeply on it! I praise you for not rushing yourself and giving yourself all the time you need to figure things out; you’ll make the best decision either way after! 💛

You'll understand it one day. Hopefully not too late. An unbroken line of mothers one hundred thousand generations deep precedes you... all of whom had no such doubts clouding their meaning. I really hope you understand while you have time.

Such an important thing to realize that not everyone may in life! Whatever you choose to seem to be thinking very adamantly on it so I know you’ll make the right choose for you!

@@goodlookinouthomie1757 she already understand that having kids is selfish. Thank God before too late

There are many different ways to pass on a legacy two of which can include writing or teaching. It sounds like your carefully weighing all angles of this decision. Good for you, I'm also confident that you'll do what's best for you as well.

On top of that the children born as of lately will sadly be brought up in a world not fit to live in for so many reasons. We are reaching the point of no return and we will be lucky if ourselves and younger generations can fix things. I'm happy to know that your parents understand even if its with from the aspect of the environment, it's a big form of respect!

I relate to this so much coming from a strict African background.

It's almost like they really believe these tactics will work without realizing it just makes the idea less and less desirable than it already was. Everyone is so concerned with others having babies until the babies are actually born! Good on you for standing your ground and having a response to each and every "idea" the put out! Personally, I would say if they can't except you for you and your choices they don't deserve your respect nor your presence. there are so many outdated ways of thinking and things need to be changed!

My husband and I have also been together for almost 7 years as well! 🙌 It really honestly just takes another person to open you up to a whole new world and way of thinking - not that they change you but just that they should you a world beyond the bubble that surrounded you your whole life. I fully agree! The freedom tor sleep, travel, and just chill is so precious and time is ultimately just too valuable to miss out on the experiences we personally see as being more important! Having a partner you can share a friendship with as well is just so rewarding and not worth the risk of damaging it either!

Ah this is great in the sense because I thought I was the only one! Sadly, not everyone gets that opportunity to figure that out before hand because it can honestly take having to move from that place sometimes and just meet other people to see different views! I always had this feeling growing up (before I knew what childfree was) that had I had kids lets say, it would be a horrible birth experience. Life teaches you to always trust your gut too!

Thank you! We are beyond happy living our life just the way it is doing as we feel whenever (within reason).

there's a difference between being childfree by choice vs. involuntarily childless even though these terms sound very similar. childfree are those who do not want children at all whereas childless are people who don't have kids due to infertility or other circumstances in their lives but still want children one day. also, chances are, people who are childfree have more than one reason why they've chosen not to have kids and not being able to afford them is just one reason but it's not the only one.

There are different aspects to people choosing not to have children which include a multitude of reasons. Some may choose to be childfree for the planet, the world we live in, because they don't like kids, it doesn't feel natural etc. I completely understand where you are coming from though. This world we were dealt is pretty awful and I'm not sure we'll ever be able to fix all the things that are wrong.

Forgive me but the financial argument is bullshit. You have a child and you find a way. The love you will have for your little one is like finding a superpower and you can't begin to imagine the things you will be capable of.

@@goodlookinouthomie1757 this is how we got people feeding their kids rotten food then kissing them goodbye in the hospital

@@slimetank394 The kind of people who feed their kids rotten food are not the kind of people who ever wondered if they could afford them in the first place. They just go ahead and have them - not uncommonly for the express reason of claiming government pay checks if they're in western countries. There are some people really shouldn't have kids at all, admittedly. But the irony is that the socially or environmentally responsible people wringing their hands about whether they can give their child a decent life are the exact ones who _should_ be parents - and decide not to be....

Im so sorry you had to experience all of that! My sister had a very similar upbringing and I watched everything she went through, through the eyes of the younger sibling. I'm hoping that this journey has brought some healing your way!

When you do have a child (and from what little have I read here I think you will) you will dig so deep as to become almost superhuman in your capacity to give of yourself. And you will think it inconceivable that you were ever of another mind. As almost all mothers do. Except the really bad ones and you are clearly not that.

@@goodlookinouthomie1757 Nah, my husband and I made our decisions physically permanent.

@@diaryofthechildfree Oh. If you are being sincere about that, then my condolences. I made a somewhat glib reply here that you will change your mind. But I will not comment further as that would be in poor taste. Best wishes.

@@diaryofthechildfree thank you! So sorry to hear that.🫣

Thank you so much for watching and subscribing! So happy to hear that you are living your best DINK like! 🙌 Thank you!

🙌🙌🙌

The problem is that someone who feels like you should be strongly advocating for a hyper capitalist or libertarian system of governance - because social welfare systems of socialist or social-democratic countries heavily rely on child-birthing (the "generational agreement" that every citizen is subject to). A "I don't want to have children but I want to have social welfare systems" mindset has been shown to be a very prevalent yet deeply problematic one. Many Western social democracies are forced to colonize the children and younger generations of third world countries to prevent their welfare systems from collapsing due to low birthrates. This is why so many third world countries suffer from brain-drain and economic stagnation. A child-free person would, even when paying twice the amount of taxes, still likely not compensate the loss of value generation that comes with not having a child. There is an ideologic cognitive dissonance that currently permeates society, which is also what generates a lot of frustration with child-free attitudes. Having a cake and eating it, too... simply does not work. In a country with socialized welfare systems, not having children is turned into one of the most anti-social thing a person can do, due to how these systems are set up.

Exactly @lilithmarleen that's my way of thinking as well👍🏻

@@KangMinseok I don’t care about any of that. The world is overpopulated as it is, there are plenty of children to support the social welfare of developed countries. Besides, what I pay in taxes for most of my life is more than enough to support me in my old age. I don’t care about preserving my country’s population, if it needs more people as the older generations die out, then it needs to make itself more attractive to immigration, and also to keep the young, qualified workforce instead of being so inhabitable that many choose to leave the country seeking a better life.

@@lilithmarleen I don't think you understand how the i.e. pension system works (in most systems, your money is paying the older generation of today, and the next generation pays your pension). Please research what these generational agreements actually mean. And yes, there are many children in this world - they are among the most valuable resources, especially to third world countries. What you are writing (to suck them up through immigration) is basically oppressive, colonializing supremacy at its worst... and yeah, you put it very nicely... you do not care... as I said, very anti-social, that is fine, as long as you don't support socialist ideals and welfare systems.

@@KangMinseok colonizing means to impose one country’s leadership and laws into another country, making the second country a colony of the first. Immigration is when people from one country willingly move to a different country. Very different things, but it seems like you’re too obsessed with procreation to understand these concepts. Having kids is not an obligation. There are more than enough people to support the economy, people just need to stop being xenophobic and welcome immigrants who are in search of a new home and a better life.

Yes! It really doesn't take much to enjoy a good and happy life!

What a sweet compliment! Thank you so much! ☺️✨

Such an important thing to do. It can be a long journey but the process eye opening and so worth it! We can't be our best selves unless we dive within!

@@diaryofthechildfree exactly.

Thank you so much for being here, I’m glad you enjoyed the video and found your own similarities within! 😊💛✨

Omg I can only imagine that feeling of peace and quiet after a day spent with kids! It really becomes more appreciated at that point!

Wooh! I had to let teaching go last year after 10 years of teaching. I had enough. 🙂

i love the concept of childfree teachers! you give knowledge to the next generation, while not having the responsibility of their personal lives

I'd probably lose my head!

Thank you so much for sharing! I can agree completely with those feelings! It unshamingly feels SO GOOD to be in charge of your life, decisions, and outcomes! No regrets to a life of putting yourself first! 💛☺️

@@diaryofthechildfree 💕💕

Thank you so much for taking the time to watch! 💛✨ Men or more or so silent on the matter but I’ve been seeing more and more speak about it which is nice to see! ☺️ My husband and I really hit a moment these past few years where we really noticed how short life really is and we knew then we wanted to work hard to have memories and experiences that truly hold meaning to us! They don’t have to always be big things as it can come in terms of simplicity as well! We don’t want to look back and see things that we missed out on - like seeing the world! 🌎

You are so sweet, thank you so much! Have a lovely evening!

Thank you so much! 🥹❤️ That means a lot!

Thank you so much for being here! ❤️ I'm so happy you can relate and feel validated!

Thank you for your kindness! I value your appreciation to some of the things discussed even if it's not all fully agreed upon! A world where we can appreciate some of the things we may not fully agree with is a path towards harmony! 💛

Tysm! 💛✨

Apparently 🤣

Hahaha they wish! The majority of us are nothing special!

It’s highly narcissistic.

I know there are Facebook groups but a chat would be awesome! I’m sure there would be so much to talk about!

Yes! Im here for this! If you are content with one that's all that matters and you can focus not just on being able to be there for your child but more importantly yourself now more than ever! I'm so glad that you don't put that expectation on him either because it is definitely not fair to any of us to have that burden placed on us.

@@diaryofthechildfree true, though people that even think of childfree are always threatened with it as a consequence, so it would be helpful if you make a video regarding that as to how you got out of that mindset of fear if you did go through it. Since we are always told that we all need people to take care of us when we are sick and kind of is true to some extent that we as humans rely on each other as society. So i d really like to know how you figured it out, to me i thought that even if ppl had kids they still leave,so you can still end up alone/with your spouse and you may still have to take care of yourself and so on and when you can thats fine, but when you cant, what are the options that you see..

Oh my God! I tell people as well you should only tell your children to just be happy with their life and not expect to take care of you! So many people get mad at me for say this right here. I have no children of my own and definitely won't have children so someone can take care of me when I'm old. People don't realize you're putting your child in debt as they have their own job, their own Bills, possibly their own family to care for and then have to drop everything to take care of your broke @$$. No! No! No! Unless you're going to pay your child to take care of you and foot your own medical Bills, don't even do this to your own children. I mean, think about it. You're paying your child to care for you, what's the difference with paying a total stranger? Not every Hospice worker is a thief or a horrible person and family even steals from you. Was funny because I had one guy tell me if your children steals from you then your raised them wrong. Me and my brother were raised the exact same way, but my brother is the one who can't be trusted. Kids will turn out how they turn no matter how well you raise them. It's just more dang people expecting their children to be golden children. I honestly feel sad for these kids when they become adults because I can see their parents judging all their decision making.

It's in these moments that you really get to know and understand yourself too, it's quite beautiful!

Sleep is life! 🙌

❤️❤️❤️! I'm so glad to hear that you can resonate with these videos!

My mother thankfully never had an issue with my decision later on in life thankfully! It’s more so grandparents where I hear the usual stuff from! I never really grew up around purity culture and never knew anyone involved until I moved to the US.

Thank you for watching!

You’re telling me! It’s only going to get pricier as things progress too! 😖

@@diaryofthechildfree housing is insane. medical is insane. vet bills insane. i’d rather be childfree ahd save myself some money!

@@oceania4681 A billion yes’s! Personally, I can’t fathom having a child when 1. It’s hard to afford rent let alone a whole house 2. You have to justify whether a doctor or hospital bill is worth it and 3. A trip to the grocery store for 5 items can easily equal $100. I saw a few people share a video about how it can easily rack up to 20-30k a year additionally to raise a child. Imagine what you could do with that!?

@@diaryofthechildfree i agree. i just don’t understand why people want kids…i think loneliness is a huge factor in them deciding to have kids…but it’s not always the solution!

@@oceania4681 fear of being lonely, fear of missing out, kids being their retirement plans which are all incredibly selfish

Why would she need to do that? It's her choice. And she doesn't need to argue it with anyone

Absolutely, except that if the above elite totalitarian thugs had their way child free people like us would actually be paying a tax for choosing not to reproduce. There's actually been talk about that possibility here and elsewhere. In fact, what's perhaps even worse is that it's always been that way. Best example: Buy a house of comparably assessed value as you next door neighbor's, or even one on a nearby block, and try to get away with paying less public school tax than those same neighbors who have kids. Remain in tax arrears long enough and the County Sheriff will come and evict you and seize your house for unpaid taxes. And here on Long Island, school tax comprises at least 65% of the average property tax bill. And of course there's your federal and state income tax, where YOU are helping to make up for the tax that people with kids are exempt from, for every kid they have, at least while the kids can be claimed as deductions. Posting on youtube, via podcasts and especially via forums and using your state's petition, recall and referendum legislative tools are the only way we have of getting and keeping tax JUSTICE. www.populationbalance.org/

Thank you! I use a Sony A7S III

Do you mind elaborating?

I haven’t but it’s a great idea! I need to get better on prioritizing my reading first! I would love to find a way to incorporate this though as it’s a great way to also share Childfree books/authors!

@@diaryofthechildfree I have a few books you could read I'm glad my mom died by Jeannette mccurdy Lucky me by sachi parker her memoir Not my father son by Alan Cumming his first memoir

Both our parents, thankfully, reacted rather well. We’re both the youngest and already have siblings with kids, so not sure if that maybe helped. They would have obviously loved if we did but they also already have their fix of grandkids. Our aunts, uncles, and grandparents have been the ones questioning our choices and the ones to be like “you’ll change your mind” or “are you sure?”.

Sadly, i don’t have an exact answer to this. My best advice to this would be to be open right away regarding what you want and what you’re looking for to avoid hurt feelings or dragging things out too long.

@@diaryofthechildfree ya that is exactly what I do, I hope I find someone soon 🤞🏻

Woot! Thank you for following along! 👏💛✨

if they were at all "on the fence" about the decision..maybe. but regret is super rare for those who knew from a fairly young age that it was not going to be the right choice in the least. and never swayed from it.

You explained it: yours was not a choice but a circumstance. Major difference. Also I don’t take young women in their 20’s seriously about this topic. Let me hear them again after 35. It’s not yet a choice as long as you still have the freedom to change your mind.

@@WateryFire i totally agree with that.. while it is refreshing that childfree channels and pages are finally becoming more prevalent, i do prefer the ones with women closer in age to myself (40's)...who've been apart of this way of life for a very long time.

@@EadsB7002 i’m 39 F. no kids. knew at 9

You said you didn’t have much of a choice, that’s why you regret it. I am in my 20s and I am happily childfree with my husband, and we are excited to stay that way our entire lives together.

LOL, depending on where you live, especially in Europe you pay more taxes if you´re single, and get some sort of reduction first when you get married and then a ton of reductions once you have children- in certain places if you have 3 kids, you don´t pay any income tax at all! So yeah, this is already in place the welfare states. But to attribute the brain-drain in third world countries to this, is just silly. The reason there´s a brain drain there (and other, not-so-wealthy countries that aren´t necessary third world) is because the opportunities there are just crap. Nobody would leave their own country just to replace the population in an aging developed country unless there are serious advantages to the move and chances that they won´t have at home.

@@pencilany Does your calculation equate to double tax burden per person? Where do you live where this is the case? I've friends in i.e. Sweden, and it's certainly not the case there at all. I fundamentally disagree with you, if social democracies had firm border control, the brain drain could be easily controlled. It is the fact that social democracies (with intent) do not control their borders or limit immigration consistently that provides a major incentive for the drain. It is a form of neo-colonialization, even if the people in the colony live "less primitive lives".

We live in a capitalist world though lol. 0 safety net. If we lived in a socialist society, people would have the energy and means to bring up children and would be more likely to have them.

@@sparklyunicorn5431 are you saying that a socialist society could never be achieved because the rest of the world is capitalist?

@@KangMinseok im saying you're a dumba$$ troll because there are current 0 socialist societies, so stop it with the fake concern regarding CF women.

Gross.

Ew you

If EW stands for extremely wholesome, then I fully agree! ❤

Then it's a good thing she chose what was right for HER. You can all snarky comments you want, but HER decision effects no one BUT herself. Keep it steppin'.

Girl you salty.

If I chose to have kids I wouldn’t be able too, but I didn’t, so I can. Easy explanation.

@@gnocchi6610 Always.

@@ashleyfire4312 👏👏👏

You're welcome!

She didn't say she was against cloning

You sound like a very happy parent. 😂😆😜

@@homeremedysanctuary Yes I am. My 4 children are all raised and now I reap the rewards!!

@@niltomega2978 congrats 👏

I feel like the only reason some of us played with dolls was because they were just handed to us and it’s what we saw others doing as well! Oh gosh, especially when they would start crying! Anytime someone had me hold a baby (which wasn’t often) they would always cry. 😅 I actually graduated with a few girls who were pregnant and they just accepted it like it was normal but you’re such a different person at 17/18. I’m right there with you! This world IS messed up and I fear beyond repair. I can’t imagine the distress it would bring in every aspect of life to add a child into the mix. Thank you so much! I’m happy to see more of it as well! This community is growing so much and it’s just nice to know that people starting out in this era of their life have a community to be a part of! Hahaha thank you! My husband is the photographer/videographer talent behind everything (he’s showing me the ropes)! 😂

same

Reading the first few sentences has made me realize that, when I played with dolls as a child, I never potrayed them as mothers, nor did I care for baby dolls. In fact, I loved Bratz dolls because they looked beautiful, and I wanted to look like them. That was my only reasoning, lol. This has also been true as a teen and adult. I never cared for babies, and whenever I saw them, my first thought was, "Yikes, that is a heavy responsibility that I never want to bear." Funnily enough, I work with children-but it's more so because it started as a need for money at first, and now I realize the field I am in is profitable (ABA) for myself + I absolutely love behavior change, psychology, and neuroscience-and it just happens to be that kids are great to work with in said fields because you see the best results. I became a first time aunt in September. I love my nephew to death and am constantly learning more and more daily about babies, their needs, and how to increase the likelihood of a child's success. The field I am in as well as being a neuro student gives me an edge. I am very excited to be a big part of his life, and I am even more excited for my other siblings to have children. I even subscribed to Lovevery so that my nephew (I was tempted to write, "My baby," because I just really love him that much) has the opportunity to play with evidence based toys to ensure he is well-developed by the time he starts school. I also love the children I work with, so much so that, if need be, I am willing to protect them and die if need be (God forbid we are ever in that situation). But do I actually want one of my own? Absolutely not. There is nothing romantic about being pregnant, birthing a child, and raising him or her. It is hard work, sweat, and grind. I realize I would bear the responsibility of another person, and that is no joke. I am personally not willing to put myself in that situation. I just don't want to and have no desire for it. The best thing about working with kids is that they get picked up, and I get to go home and enjoy myself. The best thing about being an aunt is that I can be on the sidelines, cheering them on, be encouraging, and supporting them as needed.

@@avapilsen I never really did either! I remember seeing the pregnant Barbie doll and it creeped me out! Ahh! I loved Bratz! They focused more so on the beauty and fashion aspect which was a nice alternative than the motherly aspect that got pushed with dolls. I work with children as well and similarly my first just was at a daycare as a teen because I wanted money. 😂 It was awful but it paid. I still work around kids and it really is interesting to see how they act, especially how they’re all so different. While I’m in a very different field it’s also nice that it’s only ever short periods of time and then they go home! Nieces and nephews are definitely a learning curve! I have 4 total now and I love them but it was awkward at first! I think as aunts and uncles we offer a unique position on their lives that’s different from a parental role and more of a friend to lend a hand or give advice to where they feel needed. It’s great that you say that because I’m sure people tell you or think about how well you are with children - the whole speech etc! 😂 While they can be enjoyed it’s a huge responsibility and one that takes a toll on your body, mind, and spirit.