I’ve been working since I was 15, I’m 36 now, and I haven’t found meaning in my work in my entire life. I recognize it for what it is, a means to provide. Find meaning somewhere else.
Yes working for a wage rather than to just directly provide for your own basic needs will pretty much always feel meaningless. When I'm splitting firewood I feel that it has more meaning than when I'm slugging through paperwork & engineering dwgs or updating databases even though that pays much more money than I can make chopping my own firewood.
I totally agree! Some look for validation from doing a good job at work. I dont hate or discpize my work I just dont feel any worse or better after doing it lol
Thanks you for saying that Warren. And if you can find ‘meaning’ in your work, that is the icing on the cake and not the goal. The goal is to provide your employer with someone who is dependable and that is justified in his wages. All this mental babble that young people are buying into means eventually there will be no one to build a house or apts; No one to cook & teach in schools. The future is bleak.
@TheR3alRyan It's always smart to have a job replacement before quitting a job. Employers are not as inclined to hire someone who is not employed. And you can't predict whether someone will hire you in whatever time frame your finances can handle. That being said, you don't have to stay in your miserable job forever but you do need to have a new job before you leave your miserable job.
I teach that to my students but I also told them that once I broke this rule due to two twiddle Dee and dumb bosses. Even you won't be able to handle it.
My brother used to do that, quit his jobs when somebody does something he doesn't like. Did that until he was 50 years old then finally woke up when family members stopped letting him borrow money.
She has a history of getting fired and quitting jobs. She can't handle her jobs and gets easily frustrated. She has trouble getting along with people at her jobs. These are not qualities of a good therapist.
Yeahhhhh seems like often shrinks and counselors and such enter those fields to try and better understand themselves.... which doesn't work and is way more expensive than simply going and getting counseling. Lol
I was a single mother for 17 years....worked several jobs to make ends meet. Met my husband 9 years ago and I continued working until he asked me to be a stay at home wife. We sold our large home, bought a small home and paid it off, sold our second vehicle to only have one payment and now we can live off of one income. My kids are already 26, 23 and 17 now but it takes a lot of hard work to make sure you and your kids have everything they need. If you want to live off of one income you have to he prepared to sacrifice a lot of wants. I cook most meals here at home, we don't go on extravagant vacations. It's doable but you have to learn to be very frugal.
@@annasimons389 I've heard that a lot of men have a hero complex, which causes some of them to see single moms as vulnerable and in need of help. It triggers the protective instinct in some men, even if they never thought they could seriously consider a single mom before. They can make a man feel useful or needed. Also, some people become a better, more beautiful person after becoming a parent, and others are drawn to that.
Tell her to get a job serving tables, she’ll make WAY more than $30k. I served tables my entire 10 years of my 20s and tbh it was the most rewarding job I’ve ever had. I love talking to people and helping them and that job made me feel very very rewarded. I felt like a psychologist with my tables sometimes
I make $17 an hour at a grocery store. It's one of many part time jobs I have. That actually comes to $13 an hour so I wonder if she's part time or something.
As a licensed social worker and independently licensed therapist, I cant tell you how many peers went into this field to fix themselves. But front that its to help others. This guy’s wife needs to sort out her own issues. She is going to project all that on her baby and future clients if she even gets that far in her career.
This guy needs to say no to the extra degree. That’s just more money down the drain with no roi. He should find her a good counselor and let her be a stay at home mom. This happens over and over. Women get these degrees and become psychologists and then drop out of the field. There is actually a shortage at the moment. Personally I think that’s because women dominate the field but can’t handle it emotionally and leave. Men a discouraged from entering because it’s portrayed as a “women’s” job. So you get high turnover and shortages. But this guy needs that drain on the family income like a hole in the head. Just say NO!
Nothing wrong with that! You men are sick in the head not wanting to work and provide for your family. A woman home can safe a ton of money and in many cases is way better for the family
Men generally should expect that if they are married and they are having sex with their wives unprotected that she possibly will conceive their child! That is something that men need to factor in before they get their wives pregnant! Its life and it happens in case you didn't know that! Ridiculous!
I quit my job when my third baby was born… it was impulse. Going back to work was too hard. My husband just hugged me and told me congratulations. We made it work and I’m so thankful that my husband supported me during that time.
Thats exactly where I am right now. We just had our third and I'm a social worker and the work is too mentally and emotionally hard 12 years in... I'd rather do more part jobs now!
Same here. I’m an RN and still have not returned to work as my third has turned one year old this month. We are making one income work and I would love to go back to work. However, the only option I have is to work weekends given the nature of nursing shifts. I would love to find work that doesn’t require me to sacrifice sleep and perform logistical acrobatics to get my kids taken care of while I’m away
@@jessicab6876 When my third turned 6 months-old I started working part time and remote to make the budget stretch a bit more. It was a great balance for me and let me stay close to my babies when I felt they still really needed me. I hope you found something too!
@@somethingsaboutmary3134 I heard some nurses get a full-time salary just being on-call over night? I think one woman told me she works once per month. She just has to have her family on the ready to step in and watch the kids if needed. Is that still a thing?
So, I literally love my job. I'm a roller coaster mechanic, I graduated from college as an an interior designer. When I graduated, I was like, I wanna work in rides because I love them. Here we are, I've been a roller coaster mechanic for 18 years❤
Entry level social work jobs are incredibly intense emotionally, really rough, families with so many problems. It's a job for the few who can handle it. Really, give the woman a break. My daughter does that work at age 23 and after 2 years she's already burnt out, and she LOVES the work. It's hard.
@@wilhoit haha, but also, we have no other context here, and she never said she wouldn't get a new job. I don't see anything wrong with changing jobs as long as it's not lower paying.
I had an internship with the county humane services. Those social workers always showed up to the meetings looking stressed out and complaining about lack of resources. It’s not a job for everyone
Worked all my life, started babysitting at 14. I am a social worker, it's a thankless job. But never once thought about not working. Bills still need paid.
First jobs are tough because it's when you learn that bosses and coworkers can be awful. Accepting that it will likely be the same everywhere is the key to managing a career. Let things roll off, don't react to annoyances, etc. Make a game out of being overly nice to people who suck. Fighting the system will bring misery. Spare your emotional energy for people in your life who matter. Sounds like this girl isn't cut out for social work. No worries, most of us have no clue about a career at age 23. A bachelor's or master's degree in psychology, whatever she has, can be useful in more analytic careers like clinical research.
If your life experience is that way then that just means you were sheltered and didn't have a clue as to how life worked until you thrown into the thick of it. These are the snowflake types they talk a lot about on this show.
I have a friend the same way. She earns north of $150K, and has lax responsibilities. She wants to leave because she doesn’t feel fulfilled. I recommended she find fulfillment in her children, not her job. This is not an economy to job hop.
Show her the Bible verse... Colossians 3:23 NIV [23] Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, Implementing this changed EVERYTHING for me because giving up a $150k job? Yikes!! Noooo!😅
"When the wind blows, she storms out of the room" - this is exactly what my husband is like. He recently got promoted and it didn't take long for him to realize that as we get paid more, it's expected that the work gets tougher too. I also got recently promoted and I have always been the major earner between us.. Sometimes, I feel like he sees this as his easy ticket way out of being responsible. We have 2 small kids ages 10 and below. His 1st work anniversary was 4 months ago and this is his 1st job after a 2.5 year-long hiatus. Aside from that, his parents are extremely financially unwise and practically live off their kids' support - no retirement plan planned whatsoever. I am based in the Philippines, but I think problems such as this cross race, location and scenarios but the root cause is mainly the same - fear of responsibility.
She's only 23. She should focus on therapy for herself and being a mom. There's plenty of time after she figures out her own issues and raises the kid to school age to finish her degree and find a meaningful career.
just to add another perspective, social work is such a hard job. it burns you out so fast. people go into social work to help people but it winds up consuming the person trying to help.
It’s hard but how hard is it to figure that out? If you’re taking out a loan to study it, doing basic “would I even like this sort of work” thinking is very much required. It always gets me. Teachers go in having no idea what teaching in a public school is actually like, then graduate, try it out, hate it and quit.
@@TheresaReichley A people have to work and B don't know much without trying it. Not a simple search for so many jobs... For example it is ;likely easier to run a concentration camp than a formal prison with rules.... Work is likely very similar....
If you are not cut out for a career, do research and homework first. Most of us just have to work but there are other work choices. Don’t keep going down the same old rabbit hole. Mary
@@marvinthomason8540 It's very hard to understand what a particular job is like when you're only 17 and don't know anything about the branch or work in general. Then you get an education and you like it, but after 3 years you find out you're not really up for most jobs. What are you supposed to do then? Not finish your education? You don't have many options in that situation. The only thing you can do really is get to work anyway, and hope you can slowly create a situation that's better, or maybe educate yourself towards something different.
As someone with ADHD and anxiety, sometimes what happens is that we have to mask in certain environments and the extra stress of that is extremely fatiguing. I have always been a very hard worker, but forcing myself to not listen to my body led to a full on burnout at 35. Close to an autistic burnout. It was very serious and I couldn’t work for about 6 months. The more I pushed, the more I regressed. It was horrible. I did recover. But the reason it happened was not listening to my body. Many people need meaning in work (especially PDA types). Sometimes these people work best with entrepreneur type things or building up multiple streams of income. She also may just need to figure out which jobs suit her best. There are also some jobs that have toxic environments and it sounds like this particular job is one. I think if she builds up a side business before she quits or gets a new job before quitting, then she’s ok. I think the “sucking it up” piece doesn’t work when someone hits a mental wall. Someone with experience with anxiety is the perfect person for psychologist. I like DR, but felt he really doesn’t have enough understanding of mental health issues to answer this one. It’s the “make it or break it” mentality. Sure it’s great if you make it, but what about the people who break? Often pushing past our limit doesn’t lead us to a good long term goal. And the job she has now doesn’t sound good. Better to just get a different one where she can feel inspired, while also earning an income.
These comments make me super uncomfortable. Lots of ableist talk. I was healthy physically and mentally got the majority of my life. It’s the biggest privilege I ever took for granted. The answer isn’t to push, it’s to figure out a strategy that works for you without damaging your health.
Landlord and bank doesn’t care your autistic. Do what you promised to do which is pay them. They are consequences if you don’t. This is coming from one who also is autistic. We are all worthless scum at the end of the day if we provide no value and not br someone someone else wants to work with. There is no paradise or nirvana in this world. -Richard Sowell.
Life ain't all sunshine and rainbows. Too many people act as if they believe they're never supposed to be uncomfortable... As if a good life is a default position you never have to work for. Seems to be a recurring theme.
Imagine even more than that, thinking if you sink yourself even further into debt and get a bigger degree that it will be worth it. I'm 31 and I see this with more and more friends everyday. They're not satisfied with their income (lifestyle creep) so they get more degrees and it just keeps perpetuating
I don't need to. That was most of my adult life. Only been making more than that for about a year. I also owe 15k more than them. The lie that we've been sold on higher education. I am so thankful someone gifted me FPU a couple of years ago, or my life would look so different now. Edited for typos.
This Bible verse changed my perspective at work and actually made things bearable... Colossians 3:23 NIV [23] Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters,
Very few people actually like everything about their job. That’s why it’s called work. There were many stressful times during my 41 year career but I had 5 people depending on me for their existence so I sucked it up.
I'm actually diagnosed and medicated for both general and social anxiety. My anxiety actually makes me want to stay with my job because it's my comfort zone, it's what I'm familiar with and what I know. I don't know how some people can bounce around from job to job, just the thought of that almost gives me an anxiety attack. 😂
I know this sounds harsh but i wouldn't want to have a baby with someone who first thought when she has something go wrong at her job is to just quit. Adults have responsibilities and bills dont pay themselves, children do what they want, good luck to you buddi your in for a long road of being the sole provider, sounds like a road to resentment to me
She will be a stay at home mom while he works himself to death. If the divorce come the system will reward her with his pension, assets, alimony and child support.
At the same time you have to find a job that fits you and supports you emotionally and physically and all aspects. I had a job as a first year teacher and I lost weight, I cried everyday, and I was extremely depressed. I stayed for the year and knew that I had to find something else to do. I think she could try to see a career counselor but again she’s only 23. It’s hard and a lot of pressure to know what career you’d want to do for the rest of your life at 23… it sounds like her husband is supportive and does want to help her. All I’m saying is that it’s easy to judge others but if you’ve never been in a toxic work environment then you don’t understand.
If I quit every job I felt bad at I would have quit eleventy-hundred jobs by now, if I could even still find one. Companies don't hire you to be happy. They hire you to work, first and foremost. And on a secondary level, you'll probably have to be bored, or frustrated, or bump into unkind people who try to demean and/or undermine you routinely. You think you left junior high school behind when you graduated and entered the world of work? Congratulations, you just entered junior high school professionally. It is what it is. Make the best of it like a grown-ass man or woman.
The problem is that young people need to learn how to deal with difficult people/conflicts. Regardless of what happens in life, she needs to learn to deal with problems. This is coming from someone who couldn't handle a customer being upset and little things when I entered the workforce at 22 because I was coddled a bit. If you can't handle minor inconveniences, you need to practice it. Life will throw you problems and you need to be able to handle them. It's part of growing up. Dave's advice is spot on.
I've been "sucking it up" amongst toxic coworkers for the last seven years. The stress has led me to self-destructive behavior...so now I'm more in debt than ever. It turns out "sucking it up till I'm out of debt" was not a good plan.
@@therocinante3443 Everyone is responsible for their behavior and its consequences. I am. So are my coworkers. If you treat someone like crap and they spiral as a result of it, do you consider it not your problem? That's classic sociopath mentality.
@@maylynbayani I never once blamed my actions on anyone else; that was your own un-analytical conclusion. By your view, if someone is abusive their victim should just bounce back all sunny, smiling and undamaged... and if they don't it's their own fault. If you walk down the same street every day and someone there always punches you in the face, you will bruise. You don't have control over whether or not you will bruise. You DO have control over whether you continue to walk past them or not. I believed "sucking it up" and staying on the same path for years was the right thing to do...but I kept bruising. I finally took a different path and left so the bruises could heal.
So sick to hear all the time that this person has anxiety, this person has anxiety - as excuses for not dealing with life. At this time in our country with all that is going on here and around the world - we are ALL anxious! Deal with it and get on with taking care of your family!
I hear that term all the time, and nobody can tell me what it is. 'I have anxiety.' Yes, don't we all? We need it to function as a human being. Even animals have it and need it. It wouldn't be good if you didn't have anxiety. You'd be the worst psychopath of all times. It's different if you have pathological, unreasonable fears, like phobias, but that's not what they mean by anxiety. So... what is it?
Common feelings that are part of everyone’s life (e.g. anxiety, grief) are now labeled as mental illness. I’ve heard other people use anxiety as an excuse to avoid work.
To be honest, i relate to the wife. It’s not that I think what she does is right, because its not, but as someone who wasn’t allowed to get a job till I was 19, and someone who didn’t know how to drive till I was 21, work was the only life that I had outside of a toxic home life, so I didn’t stick it out as much. I also come to realize that some of the negative scenarios at work were due to an undiagnosed disorder that I’m just now learning about and learning how to cope with.
I don't know if I even know what job "fulfillment" means in and of itself. I don't hate my job and even enjoy it from time to time, but what brings me job-related fulfillment is that I have been able to use the money I make to support my family and up to an including post-secondary education for 4 kids. There are many ways to find "fulfillment". However, if she is expecting her social work clients to be grateful, I heard that may have happened once.
She's doesn't want to work now, and she'll likely not work after having the kid. Very few people work in a field that makes them feel good all the time. It serves a purpose. For her, it's paying the student loans she racking up on a degree she likely won't use. He sounds like a very supportive husband who will soon become an ex-husband because "she's no longer happy" and call him a narcissist. Sounds like she's making it everyone else's job to make her feel good. Smh. I hope I'm wrong but this sounds utterly ridiculous and childish and I think he's trying his best to put her in a good light.
You hit the nail on the head. Definitely a future ex with this one. She's not able to put long-term goals over her immediate desire to feel good, which is essentially the mentality of a toddler.
The timing of the kid is also more than suspicious. These days you can, and should, try and plan when to get serious about having kids. She now gets the pregnancy as an excuse for not doing anything. Hope I am wrong, but he is likely in for a lifetime of hurt.
Yupp. She's 23. If she's decent looking she will have the child then wait a bit, then leave him for a guy who can give her the resources financially she wants without having to work.
I genuinely mean it when I express my stress and concern regarding the market crash and high inflation, particularly in relation to my retirement. I have been experiencing losses for quite some time, and while some may argue that crises can present opportunities, I am feeling overwhelmed. However, I understand that investing is a long-term endeavor, and it is crucial to maintain focus on the bigger picture and the long run.
He married a kid. At 23 and pregnant, she has you roped in. Plan on getting a 2nd job because this PG honey wants to be a mommy and have you foot the bill. Forever.
Yep. Seen that movie a million times. You'd be amazed how many of these women get a Masters Degree with tons of debt, many never even work in their field of study, than end up finding some simp (like this guy) who works himself to death to support her and the kids.
@@jennpul1015 I think many of us were unplanned and by unresponsible people decades ago. I just have trouble visualizing a young man and woman sitting around with coffee and then planning a conception. Nope, usually hot pants after drinks. Your thoughts!
Omfg! Pbatesltd turned out to be a bloody smart move. I love love love this. I’m the wrong side of 40 so I’m taking this all on board IMMEDIATELY- thank you! Even if I run out of time my kids will benefit from this incredible education. Thankyou thankyou thankyou!!
I also have anxiety. I've gone to therapy (I still go when needed), sometimes I take some sort of medication, and I've had to actually do the work and try. I've failed many times, but eventually I've found myself at a good place. It takes work, consistency, and time to learn how to deal with anxiety. I wish her the best of luck and it is possible for her to get through it and succeed.
My ex was constantly doing this, wouldn’t take a job unless it filled his soul. After he left us, he was unemployed for 10 months and it was always somehow my fault. 😂 Luckily, I earned enough to just get by and provide for my family but with small children and childcare it was very stressful. But I did it and I’m proud of me. I agree you have to find your “career” satisfying but a job is to pay the bills, especially when you have a family to provide for.
What a patient and understanding, loving and supportive husband. He'll always carry her and anxieties if he doesn't stand ground more firm on responsibilities.
I just retired from the mental health field. Must of us never did well in math and had to work through our own issues to be effective therapists. She needs to work out her issues with her own therapist. She cannot effectively help others until this happens. Being a therapist can be tough because you may represent the person that your client has the issue with-transference. And clients can be cruel and you learn to develop a thick skin. I also worked with someone that retired and she never worked through her problems. She was a nightmare to everyone including herself. She could just never see it was her most of the time. Encourage your wife to get therapy before any decisions are made. A masters degree will be a minimum of 50k.
I have been considering becoming a mental health therapist. I’m thinking I could hypothetically get the masters for it in two more years of school (I have 4 years of college in other things, though related). What is some advice you might have for me in pursuing the education, and also knowing it’s there right career fit for me? (I am a married male)
I was once a social worker, even went back to school and got a masters. Working in mental is tough. If she’s overwhelmed right now, it’s not going to change as a clinician it will likely only intensify and she will have more debt. Clinical work is all about notes, documentation, systems, etc. I would tell her to explore other career paths before getting a masters.
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My ex-wife went through a ridiculous amount of jobs within a couple of years, claiming "stress" and "depression" were the causes of her quitting. Me, trying to be supportive but realistic, told her that we would make it financially BUT that's going to look like crap on a resume. Well, the "stress and depression" continued, even while unemployed and watching TikTok and screwing around on Snapchat during the day and doing NOTHING to help upkeep the house. The moral of the story is 1. No matter how stressed and depressed you get, you still have to make a living and 2. If you have someone willing to support you, don't bite the hand that feeds with lazy, self-entitled behavior. Dave is right. SUCK IT UP.
I worked for my parents for 13 years before quitting. I quit 2 jobs within a year, because I had no idea what I wanted to do. Each time I wondered if I was quitting because I was weak, or if it really was a bad fit. My current job I absolutely love! And quite frankly I don't regret taking those other jobs. It helped me progress a lot. But yes I agree most people who quit often is because it's too hard or their boss criticized them.
And honestly what made me realize I wasn't a quitter is when my boss completely chewed me out. I apologized, expressed how I messed up, how I would do better, and went back to work more determined. Lol it sounds weird but working under my parents seriously made me question my capabilities in the real world. I did make mistakes, I still make mistakes, but I am happy where I am at. Hard work is the best satisfaction. I can't even quite describe it. It sucks and is rewarding all at once. Lol and that is my rant.
100% and because she makes very little, she will use her lack of income as an excuse to stay at home because childcare will cost a lot in comparison to what she makes. He is stuck between a rock and a hard place. Being that he is in the Navy, and I am assuming young like her that he has a trajectory to make a lot in the navy and be taken care of in the future
@@Rahbinahmost guys aren’t opposed to someone being a SAHM… it’s just that the girl has clear mental health issues she needs to deal with and they are not setting boundaries as a couple. She’s clearly trying to avoid working because she doesn’t like it, she’ll twist his arm to let her stay home, and she is never going back to work again. Plus they only make like $80k combined with close to $60k in debt from her SL. He’s shitting himself
I have the same problem as her! I can’t stay on a job more than a year the longest I stayed was 5 years! I’m currently working at Amazon Flex and work when I want to but fucccc I just want to find a job I love! 😢
I've married two women like this. 1st wife never sucked it up. Years later is finally getting therapy. 2nd wife sucked it up. Now is a year with the same job, we are a month away from being out of debt, and she has more joy about life than I've seen since the time I've met her. Often times being financial stuck makes the issue 100 times worse. So its best to paint a vision for this young lady of what could be and once she starts seeing the progress she will be on board.
I have "high functioning" anxiety (I guess, lol). Been this way my whole life. I can look and seem totally cool and collected on the outside and be battling a complete dumpster fire with screaming bystanders in my head. I hate it, but at the same time am so grateful that I have whatever it is inside me that makes me "do what you gotta' do" for my kid, my partner, and myself. I think maybe she needs to accept that. Sometimes you just have to take a deep breath, brave the shi$-storm, and make it through the day five minutes at a time. Also, low-key- she got pregnant so that she could finally have a reason to stop working. Just sayin'.
It can take up to a year to adapt to a new job and feeling like you got this. If your changing jobs every 6 months it's like starting all over again every time. This is an added layer of stress in itself. Learn to adapt and it can get easier to suck it up. It's okay to vent to your partner in reasonable ways. But you get up, and do what you got to do and make it your job to get better at it everyday. Maybe attempt to get to know your co workers, try to at least get along with them. You'd be surprised how much slack they will cut you if you try to get on their good side.
Exactly suck it up. The thing with jobs like social work, food service, retail, education you are dealing with many dregs of society. People can be asses. But you have to understand that if you are not a people person you need to get into a career firld thats going to limit the interactions you may encounter in day to day basis. Once i paid off my home and became debt free acquiring my financial freedom I left sales and just went into lawn maintenance. Very little interaction with clients and i collect my money and leave until I am called back. I have had a few times that things start to get a bit heated but I have the power to terminate the work agreement and move on to where I don't have to deal with the negatives.
It’s one thing to be young, lost and disorganized, but it’s another to be incredibly selfish and irresponsible. Taking out massive student loans when you’re unreliable & lack work ethic plus bringing a child into that is heartless.
@@knightfox4121 so then we can have more kids attending school and taking time out of the workforce and further drive down the wages of these jobs? You probably should brush up on your Econ.
@@hornetguy9063 More people attending college will not drive down wages. There are so many fields that require college diplomas that are critically understaffed right now. Making college free or more affordable will allow more people to enter these fields.
@@knightfox4121I'm working on my degree at UNC. I pay absolutely nothing after financial aid. If you pick the right schools and programs it can be free or almost free. Even without financial aid my tuition would only be $500 a semester. She paid for the college experience.
3:24 She didn't complain at this job until two months ago. But only been there six months! That is only four months, a little longer than the 90 day evaluation.😂😂😂😂
Uhm no! Women at home are ideal and his income can absolutely be enough. We have done very well for ourselves on 1 income and many babies. A woman home can save the family a ton of money too
100% it is very rare you see both husband and wife not working these days. Between the cost of living today in addition to the womens movement that they can all have careers it is very uncommon for a wife or mother not to be working
If you want a toxic feminist, sure. I’m a SAHM and my husband is a public school teacher. We do better than most other families making $100k around us. I take my job as family “CFO” seriously and we budget and save responsibly.
His wife is just a baby. This is an incredibly hard field. I'm praying for her but she needs to keep pushing. I recommend every mental health professional has a therapist and a robust self care routine and support network
Thank you for being there Pbatesltd when I wanted you to..... I was lost in this new world that I was hassled to start with ....you not only guided me along the way but you also showed me the proper way....whatever little I have been able to achieve in life is because of you today ..... I want to thank you for being there and showing me the proper way of doing thing for me you are my best guide as you truly showed me the way to life....once again , I would like to tell you a heartfelt thanks for being there.
@@katiejon17 You put in the work and made the money for 15 years though. That's a different story from the lady here. She just got her degree, can't hold a job because she's unstable mentally or emotionally. If she becomes a stay at home mom now then that means that loan was nothing more than a WASTE. Sad.
An unstable female psychologist ? Who could have thought this was possible? Also she does a 30k year job but had student debt which was over 60 k or maybe even 80k at some point Also she wants to do masters but doesnt even use her bachelors degree it seems working for a social bullshit lol Ridiculous
@@jimmymcgill6778 if a person in 3 years has changed jobs consistently every 6 months or so , she is the toxic one buddy Also jobs arent supposed to be playground, they are supposed to be a place where u make money for survival
Working during the first trimester is hard. You're so tired, the morning sickness, your brain is mush. I stopped working during my pregnancy. I just got back to work when my son was 3 and my daughter was 1 and a half.
I've spent the last 20 years as a stay at home mom, and it's been worth every dollar I didn’t earn. Now that my kids are older, I'm excited about starting my second career. I hope this family can make some good decisions and get that mom home if that's her desire.
I hate when people say they are social workers when they aren’t. Unless you have a bachelor’s or Master’s in social work and passed the licensing exam to either be licensed as a Licensed Bachelor Social Worker, Licensed Master Social Worker, or Licensed Clinical Social Worker; you are not a social worker. BTW I’m a LCSW
Dude married into 57k-100k debt and his girl can’t hold a job and now a baby is coming and she wants to be a stay at home mom 😂😂🤣 Females 😂😂🤣 she boutta soon call him a broken that can’t provide for his woman she text other men in his home 💯
Those with mental health issues sometimes make the best psychologists because they can relate to their patients on a personal level. That being said, there are a lot of people that never find meaning in their work. There are going to be mean/rude coworkers, customers, etc. With her quitting jobs the way she does, my mom and a friend of mine both have BPD and do the same thing, so maybe get an official diagnosis and find a treatment plan for her!
Take the plunge and support her in being a stay-at-home mom. That's not to say she won't have contentment issues later on (she will), but let her heal at home with children.
My wife is one week away from finishing her grad program. We're married, no kids, no debt, and she paid as she went (really affordable program)... and it still was so hard and stressful. What you can't quantify at the beginning is the value of TIME. This will absorb an incredible amount of her time. What is it worth to you to sign away all free time for two years? My wife is completely exhausted. It's been two years of constant work, homework, and projects. I'm so proud of her, but we both agree that this wasn't worth it.
That’s a really good point. I did mine before having kids and I can’t imagine having to do it after. It was worth it for me because it led to opportunities I wouldn’t have otherwise been considered for, but I wound up eventually seeking less demanding work after having kids. With a husband in the navy, I’m not sure she would do well with a very demanding job anyway since she might have to be alone with the kids for longer periods .
Even when you find your calling or something you love to do, you won't love everything about it. You just realize the pros out weigh the cons and it's worth it. You find a way to navigate through it and minimize stress. If an environment is crushing your soul, definitely leave, but also understand, pursuing your dreams is not easy. It is challenging. You will have to make sacrifices. Every path you take has a price.
When Dave drove his family into bankruptcy, did he make his wife leave the kids and go to work? In all the years that I have listened to this show, and all the Ramsey books I have read - I don’t remember Sharron going to work. I could be wrong and simply missed that. Social work is not easy - it can be very traumatic. Especially for a 23 year old, soon-to-be first time mother, who seems like a soft soul. I was an RN for 15 years - high stress/high stakes jobs can make coworkers into . I’ve experienced it. If they can survive off of his income, then let her go work part-time at a Michael’s or a secretary at the local school and throw her paychecks toward that debt. He said he brings home over $4,000/month - that is more than $50k! My husband’s take home is $2,600/month - and his contracted salary is $57k/year. And this guy brings home over $1,400 more a month than we do. (I left my RN career). I doubt Dave would be telling Sharron to “suck it up”. There are other jobs she can work. The one thing Dave got right was that she is nit cut out for that field. She shouldn’t let herself become “calloused” when she is becoming a mother. I speak from first hand experience on that one.
Thing is I dont believe Sharron did work during that time and didnt rack up student debt like this one did. Daves issue was also in the 1980s, different world than it is today
@@christopherpaige406 he had parents and in-laws. The point is (and I am always shocked to see someone get so tRiGgErEd) that she absolutely have gone to work, but she didn’t.
@@t206kid Not really. Interest prices and groceries were more expensive than most people remember. What is different, and wildly so, is how much people now spend on non-essentials. And yes, she didn’t “rack up the debt”, but Dave has always been consistent on a marriage being a team - debt and income is not “yours vs mine”. I agree that she needs to work. But Dave would never speak to, or address his wife, mother, or daughter like that. Social work is nasty, and this woman seems soft. And she’s pregnant. That field isn’t for her - she should quit and then go into a soft job. Her husband can have the consistent job, she can work at the water department taking bills and call, she can be a teacher’s aide, she can be a secretary, or an activity aide at a nursing home. She can make money without suffering that stress. There’s no shame is acknowledging that not everyone has “thick skin” and is “calloused”... and maybe we don’t want that for mothers.
I know someone who got a masters in psychology and the professor told him that if he couldn't apply it to his life not to continue in the field. He eventually ended up shrinking heads of lettuce at a grocery store in the produce department. .
A those in the psychology field are called shrinks. In the vegetable department they pull leaves off of heads of lettuce as they wilt thus shrinking heads. It's a humorous reference.
Dave, I know I can be critical of your advice on occasion, but this one is spot on. I think another aspect of this situation that needs to be brought to light is the fact that she seems to be chasing education/degrees and never utilize them. The only time you should ever pursue a degree is if it will garner you more money in the end, and if the benefits outweigh the negatives. I am concerned about the husband in one respect, as I can tell he loves his wife. He needs to have this conversation with her, or even show her this answer.
Shes just young! I was that girl too. I didnt go to college but i got decent jobs in managment and warehouse work. Couldnt ever keep them cuz id just get so fed up id walk tf out midshift. It wasnt until we got evicted for not paying rent is what woke me up. Think i was 24 25? And no one could save me but me my family was holding me acountable and not bailing me out! So i got 2 jobs and my bf got 2 jobs. 5 kids. We were exhausted! Now were married. I get to be a housewife and volunteer at my local animal shelter. I get to be home baking and cooking which is my passion and spending the whole summer with my babies is a blessing! he has an amazing career. His income goes up 10$ an hour every couple of months it seems. Its just crazy looking back i never thought id never find happiness but we made it! Stay content! Stay humble! Stay focused and stop punishing yourself young lady. You will get there! Youll be okay!
