Narcissist don't expect you to fight back 

They don't expect to be discarded. I did it, while it stung for a minute. My peace of mind was restored. 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️

If they ignore you.. You are blessed.. Take the Gift and make it permanent ..🎉

He threatened to shoot me. I waited until he left to get his children for Christmas. He was gone two days travel. Packed up what I could and our infant daughter. Left. Moved to another community seven hrs away. Got a 4-month restraining order that detailed the abuse. Got a new well paying position. Never went back. One and done

He didn't expect me to be able to get out on my own. He didn't expect me to file for divorce. He didn't expect me to find a way to get an attorney. He didn't expect me to fight everything his slimeball attorney filed. He didn't expect I would leave the house. He thought I was weak, but he forgot who he was messing with. 💪

My ex narc thought he had me completely broke down after 4yrs. I was bedridden & disabled with an incurable condition. The last 8 months of our relationship was a living hell. He made sure to let me know what a burden I was when he wasn't running off for days to do his own thing. I educated myself, started online therapy behind his back, made a plan and went no contact. He did not see it coming. He lost his mind in the weeks following & was furious. Loss of control will do that to a narc. It's been 150 days no contact & I have no regrets.

A neighbor was married 45+ yrs to a scarily abusive man. She couldn't even walk up the street to Bingo without him continuously calling her. It was incredible the control he had over her. She left him by having a health issue she had her granddaughter take her out of state to fix. Granddaughter texted him he would get the divorce papers in the mail. Never talked to him again. It was the most beautiful, powerful thing. It's never too late.

Your strength will be construed as disrespect toward them. 😁😆🤣😂

My narc mistook my long suffering patience, good nature and kindness for stupid. Once we were married and moved away, once I was isolated, he showed himself. Then he realised that he had married the eldest sister of 5 younger brothers whom I adored but who did as they were told. No male told me what to do, the iron fist in the velvet glove. He hit a brick wall, I knew the male psyche better than he did, I had a big sisters control, a big sisters anger, a big sisters put down, a big sisters smart mouth and a big sisters strength. He was just another little brother.

When I started standing up to him, the narc who was in my life said ‘I cannot stay married with you if your love has conditions’. I said okay and never went back. He thought it was a joke when he saw I was serious this time he tried to convince me to go back to him by telling me that I was so ugly no one would love me. Then the abuse escalated to threats. I just went no contact although we have children together. I have felt peace in my life since I went no contact

They are threatened by strength

After 25 years I finally started standing up for myself!!!! Best thing I have ever done for myself!

Sexlessness. Sharing a bed with someone who doesn’t acknowledge you are a sexual being hurts so much. I was in a sexless marriage for years. Being a woman with a high libido, I felt inadequate. Worst I feel invisible. The man who was “supposed” to want me, just didn’t. We talked about it many times, more than I can recall now. It was always me. I wanted too much - once a week was too much for him. I didn’t initiate - he was always complaining of headaches, stomaches, always stressed, always tired. I was too sexual - when being subtle doesn’t work, what is next? Explicitly saying I wanted sex. Oh but then it was not appropriate. Conversations would end up with him saying he didn’t feel desired or I made him feel emasculated because he didn’t want sex as much as I did. Yeah, it was always me. I could never win. While we were dating we would have a decent amount of sex, it was good. The first huge red flag was not having sex in our honeymoon - which I ignored. It rapidly decrease to once a week, then every other week. Years gone by it was months in between, by the time we divorced it was over a year with no sex. I cried myself to sleep more times that I can count. I didn’t understand what was wrong with me. Was I that undesirable? Was I repulsive? After those conversations, I just stopped trying, initiating, mentioning sex. We were still loving - holding hands, hugging, kissing - but sex was off the table. He then cheated on me. Swore he had sex only 4 times in a year (or more) long affair. It didn’t matter. For years my self worth was damaged by him, years of low self esteem, years of feeling less of a woman, the marriage that was more than over, waiting in hospice, really ended. Funny how things are, I asked him for a divorce, he manipulated me into staying, next day his infidelity came to light. I was out as soon as I could. Best thing of my life. Additionally, That feeling when your partner cheated and you don't have the courage to leave him / her so you just death with the pain and live everyday asking questions about your worth. This pain is different from the cheating one_living and seeing him everywhere anticipating when he or she do it again. The best thing is to hire a private investigator digitalinvestigate@gmail.com to help you spy on their cellphone remotely just like he did for me...

He didn’t know who he was dealing with, I called him out on everything to the point where he would get so frustrated, and then finally when I had enough I said boy bye!!

God has been my source of power, strength, and wisdom.

I was told repeatedly to stop talking back I informed him that I will talk back clap back and slap back you better be ready to face the beast you unleash because you can't handle it

Personally, I locked the door and threw out the key. I blocked them on my phone, social media and everything as soon as I see that they’re Narcissist. I bet they hate that.

The more strength you show, nastier they become! I am seeing my narc at a whole new nasty level since the time I have started to stand up for myself. He is coming with new tricks everyday!!!

This is spot on! Knowing he didn’t expect me to have strength only helped to fuel my strength and determination.

My FREEDOM DATE 1-18-2024. I have been NO CONTACT for 31 days now! I BLOCKED HIM AND DIDN'T LOOK BACK! He thought that I was broken. I never forgot who I was, kind, smart, loved, and strong. My scars are symbols of strength. All the pain comes from growth. You can't change the past. The only thing you can do is keep going. Everybody's journey is different. Love yourself more. You deserve better! Good luck, survivors..

My ex said that when he first saw me he thought " Wow, shes confident". He said it in a snearing way. Why start anything with someone you hate?

3 years full no contact and now spent 4 months in therapy. The next goal is to get them out of my mind to that place of indifference. And the rumination is another game all together.

He didn't expect me to thrive without him, he was hoping (evil mind) to hear my children are in care and myself in a mental institute.

My ex narcissist would say, “You’re not going anywhere, you’re not going to leave”. He thinks he’s not a narcissist but no NORMAL person would think that other people don’t have limits. However he did say I proved him wrong.

Looking at last years journal it’s a year today that I put up my cameras🎉🎉I said enough because no one believed me about Mr Nice guy to the world. The day before it was over, he said I had no idea you were this strong. Im disabled so he thought I was the perfect victim😢he didn’t know that I wasn’t always disabled. He learned that day. Thank you Lee, you hit the nail on the head this morning😀.

I feel crazy for fighting back and outting everything he did. 😢

My narc partner of four years thought he was slick with abandonment threat manipulation, to get me on my toes and make me work around him even harder. He counted my "chances" getting to zero aloud and as he pleased - even when i looked at him funny. He told me he didn't know if he loved me, he was empty inside and that he felt nothing for anyone - yet miraculously he let me stay if I conformed to his needs. All part of his masterplan. But once he announced my chances got to zero one evening I got so, so angry, packed the essentials up in ten minutes, took the dog with me and left immediately. That was the bravest thing I did in my whole life. It was so out of character not only he was surprised but me as well! I knew he wanted me to beg him to let me stay. And I did it so many times. But that one night i got so furious it was cathartic and I saw through him in a whim. I loved that manipulative ass so hard while he was threatening me with what i feared the most. I'm still brave in no-contact, while he tries to hoover me :) Thank you Lee, I watch your content mainly as a reminder to stay strong and be proud of what I've done and it greatly helps ❤

I left and survived. I was with a narcissist for nearly 30 years. I chose and won. I am alone but not lonely. I am a winner.

Winning is choosing you 😊🙌🏻💯✨😁

They didn’t expect us to BREAK the trauma bond. It hurt like a mother fucker

After 20 years I finally showed strength and calmly stood my ground. The narc had a meltdown, was seething with contempt, and belittled my accomplishments. Going no contact - thank you Lee for giving me the courage and for putting things in proper perspective for me.

He attacked me. I press charges got a restraining order and in court he stood there and told the judge that I attacked him. The judge obviously did not believe him because I uploaded everything. It’s amazing what he did to me is basically what he was describing I did to him a scary man who was in prison for 13 years for attempted murder And I started attacking him and punching him. I literally cannot believe the extent that these narcissist go to. the judge asked if he brought it up and why he agreed to the restraining order twice they definitely did not believe him

My ex actually that I was weak and had no strength😔😔. Whenever I would speak up for myself he would call me cold hearted😅😅😅!

And that first time you say NO - they scuttle off like a cockroach 😂

My narc ex told me that I won’t find someone else that loves me like he does. I said I rather be single 😅three years and going strong. Was given so many warnings to stop disrespecting me and he took me as a joke so I left him like it was funny!

Strength scares tf out of a narcissist. Trust me I know. They all run when they see me ole guilty demons.

I know my ex-husband didn’t expect for me to leave him for good. I tried to leave him at least twice before but ended up staying after he begged, played the victim, or pretended to change for a short time. When I separated from him for good and moved out of the apartment we shared, he thought he could convince me into rekindling the relationship even after I said no. I know he was shocked when he was served divorce papers. That was when I blocked his phone number because I was afraid of being harassed. I’m glad I stayed strong and didn’t go back.

I have discarded many narcissist partners , they never saw it coming and immediately went no contact with all of them, but my ex-husband , I just packed up my things when they were out and left, of course I have always been an independent woman so I could leave anytime, hence not one of them realised that I was able to do it, my ex husband told me on the phone: you are not here, I don't recognise you, you are not my Isabel, we could have talked things over, but you just left and I answered him that I had been talking to him for the last 7 years but he did not listen. He tried to hoover me back until he died, and I never came back. I had suffered enough that only God knows. I never give another chance to anyone. Thanks for the video ❤

My ex used to say I’m very masculine he would say random things to make me upset and yell then call me masculine he would say that I’m too strong, and I’m not a real woman, but he would be the one to say things to hurt my feelings that would make me yell and get upset and he would be so calm and keep saying he don’t care

When my mother discarded me, likely to make me come crawling back, she was surprised, when I locked the door behind me. She never saw me again.

When My husband threatens to leave me, I now just say ok! If that’s how you feel I won’t stop you….. he soon forgets that he feels that way. And I have a chuckle.

“ I’m a old lady you shouldn’t cuss out an old lady” when she stole my inheritance, stole land participated in identity, theft of me and my children and trafficked my son via paperwork but don’t cuss her out. She’s an old lady.🤣🤣

My birthday was St Paddys day. We were invited to dinner with my mom and dad on Friday evening (he didn't attend). He has a self umposed obligation with his mom every night at 7:30. -unless he has a good enough reason to "take the night off", like the super bowl or golf night. Anyway. I asked if he had any plans on Saturday because my daughter wanted to take me to lunch for my birthday. He said, "I have no plans, why?" "Well, I was invited to lunch with my daughter, and I thought I'd ask if she wants to go to a movie." He had the nerve to say he was hurt because he wasn't included. 😂😂😂😂 I just looked at him and said, "You said you don't have any plans. Are you going to your moms to spend your normal 3 hours on both Saturday and Sunday, and putting her to bed at 7:30?" He says, "Well, yes." I said, "So, yo u DO have plans?" Well, yes. Those plans". I just looked at him and said, "You have plans." And walked away. 😂😂😂 He's been so confused the last few weeks with the radical acceptance and indifference.

This is so true. The last thing my ex said to me 6 months ago was ‘answer my last 2 questions or you’ll never see my face again’ These two questions were just gaslighting nonsense where they were repeating things they’d already tried to throw at me. I ignored him and just text ‘Done’ because I was clearing my things out of his house and I’d finished. I haven’t spoken to him since. I miss him like crazy but anytime I think fondly of him I remind myself of all the stuff he’s done to me and remind myself that I gave him years to change and he never did and never will. Thank you so much because you’ve shown me so many things that he was doing to me. You really helped me leave ☺️

I realized this man “of God” was manipulating me, so I played dumb and hyped him up real good with validation and praise and comfort waiting for him to pull some ish again. Then he texted me an emotionally charged text to hurry answer and get in the phone it’s “important” 🙄 to corner me again with his mouthpiece. And I left him on read through the holidays and blocked him so he knew I was onto him. Buddy didn’t see it coming thought I was a punk.

Well mine must have experienced a coronary event after how firm I stood against his abuse in criminal court. He still is spending $$$ appealing his conviction

The narc in my life told my therapist and my mother that he was trying to “break my will.” My therapist told him that was not a good reason or his responsibility to do that. I’ve been no contact 11 years next month-and I’ve never been happier.

That is really sick that there are people who actually do this.

I literally took the scenic route I mirrored his behavior back to him and he was disgusted with my behavior which finally forced him out. I got strong and smart I had to learn how to set boundaries. He was determined to break me until he damn near broke himself. Test run block him or her to build your no contact muscle.

This is my number one problem. I keep defending myself because I hate being gaslighted and smear campaigned. It gets me in so much trouble. Of course I am crazy. UGH. I keep praying for the love bombing even though I know it's not real. My self esteem is so low now.

He didn’t expect me to leave and not come back. Insisted I had to be cheating. Had no idea I figured out who he was quickly and wasn’t having any part of that. Sent him into a tail spin of anger and finger pointing.

KNOWLEDGE IS POWERFUL!! I WAS ALWAYS STRONG, just was manipulated and lied to so that i would let my guard down. GOD HAS BEEN WITH ME, because that light bulb came on the fogg DISAPPEARED AND I FINALLY SEEN WHAT WAS REALLY STANDING IN FRONT OF ME!!!! Pack my bags and never looked back, coming up on 6 years no CONTACT 😂😂

This is on point today because it’s my 1 year Anniversary of leaving the narc! I watched your videos and gained inspiration and strength to make the move. He definitely told everyone who would listen that he was blindsided and I was the one “playing a role” for all the years of marriage…yeah, right…

Mines a total rage now I had to file for an order of protection

The narcissist I dated didn’t see it coming and got so butthurt that he took me to court over lies, with no proof, for a protective order. I’m still fighting him

WOW! Yes. everything my ex loved about me that he then went on to hate. He tried to strip me of my inner strength and vitality for life. Once I had moved on and he had been with his mistress for a while, he contacted me to say she boring and had " nothing about her". She was very young and a "yes person". Easily manipulated. Poor girl. Thank you so much for your honesty and insight. These videos are so helpful

I work with two narcs. They are the most controlling, needy people that I know. It was hell to get them to respect my boundaries. But, I must say, I have made a lot of progress. I am not backing down. One keeps saying "you are a strong woman". These people are sick in the head.

Lee. Your soooo right, But please let people know there are the extremes. I've had 3 major relationships and all 3 were narcissists and all 3 stalked me and left me terrified. Thanks to my belief in God, he's put me into isolation so I can heal. I'm learning my self-worth. I deserve better. I will get a better man one day. No one talks in-depth about the potential dangers of extreme narcissists when you go no contact. It would be great if you were able to do an episode on these types.

Yasssss Lee!!! After the boing boing 1,000,000 times of “goin back/lettin him back in” I decided: “DONE!!!” Universe presented the sweeeet opportunity of an adult “do over” (Do Over- Remember those as a kid?) I took my “do over” & did it up GOOOD!!! 👻👻👻👻👻👻 Thanks Lee👏🏻🙏🏻✌🏻💕

God bless you, Lee ❤😇 you have trickled in and influenced so many communities (white folk, black folk, spiritual folk, religious folk, etc.). Narcissism is so nefarious it affects all human beings in all four corners of the world. Keep it pushing, Lee; I’m one of your biggest cheerleaders ❤ get it honey 😘

Lee you be killin me with these punchlines and analogies 😂😂

I asked my ex if he wanted me back to conquer and break me or bc he loves me. He said both. I fell out laughing and hug up😂😂. He’s crazy as hell😂😂🤦🏿‍♀️

Can confirm. He definitely didn’t expect I’d lawyer up either 🤭

Our lesson is self love, learning boundaries as to what we’ll accept in our life, self respect, using our voice.

He speekin da TRUTH! I just recently cut off my best friend/Narcissistic person from my life and I literally got a shock reaction via-text from her. She never thought I was going to get strong enough to fight back (aka go no contact) until my Lord & Savior Jesus Christ confirmed in multiple ways that she is a Narcissistic person (which I had no idea in the 10 plus years that she's been my friend). And now HE is taking me through the healing process and steps on what to do next. I'm praying that everyone on this channel gets liberated from the Narcissistic people in their life. No one should have to suffer through these types of friendships or relationships. God bless you all. ❤️🙏🕊🔥⏰️

My narc ex still thought i was so weak and wimpy and he overplayed his hand for the last time i tried to keep him in our sons life and he became so disrespectful and told us that it’s either his way or no way and in that moment I realized that I no longer loved him like I thought I saw him completely different he’s not a man no man needs to control his wife and kids to feel like a man i didn’t see a man in front of me and I saw the pain in my sons face and this level Of strength came over me

When I finally stood up to my narc, he tried to convince me that my opinions about his behavior were not my own. He was convinced that I couldn't make any decisions on my own as a 30-something year old woman. He would also use anything good that was happening in my life against me including graduating from college and getting married, all of which he did not contribute to. When he couldn't find anything bad about me or didn't know what was going on in my life because I stopped talking to him, he would make things up. He liked to play mind games where he gets to make up the rules but doesn't tell anybody what they are. You're just supposed to know what's on his mind. If you messed up, then it was your fault. He's always going to be the winner, that's just how the game works! Ain't nobody got time for that!!!!

Thank you for covering this today. I have wanted you to speak on this

I appreciate this video so much. I had actually started telling my story on TikTok in an attempt to drive this point home to people in a narcissistic or toxic relationship. It's a series still in drafts. But this video is inspiring me to get it out there!! Thank you.

They knew damn well I’m a force to be reckoned with period 😂😂😂

Habitual Line Stepper..!! 👞_🥾_👢_ Step across the line, HABITUALLY. 😂😂

When you in the dark Ask them "do you want to play a game?" 😂 I'm serious

Well winning to me and I'm glad you asked that question was when I had court for almost a 70th time😢 and I learned from another woman that teaches narcissism. She said you have to do this thing called shutty shutty. It's very important. This is when you should everything down in your body. No emotions on your face. No emotions at all. You become literally a statue you have to even think statue. They may be laughing at you. They may be talking about you but you are to have no emotions. And when I left court one time I had just got out the hospital and my ex-husband literally laughed at me and said oh now good I could win the case. Of getting my daughter from me but lo and be home. God turned everything around in my favor. I didn't have to say a word and it all got worked out and he was so angry he said I don't know why you're doing this to me. And he was all up in my face and I still kept the shuttle shutty statue face and it really worked and I was so proud and I was so happy that I won this time. But you have to be quiet at everything that they do. No response like you're dead to them. You're dead to them anyway. They don't care about you so you might as well just shut them off and shut your ears off. You don't hear nothing they say even though you do hear it, don't let it affect you🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

Man on the real they damn Finna jump the gate out the gate. And they get mad when you try to put that fence up. They initially tear down your walls want to know you and all your dirt and secrets to later weaponize they are so calculated that game is unmatched. And when they start to show they ass it’s that much more bizarre and alarming!

I told him no more. He didn't argue or anything. I didn't block him on social media at first because I didn't care. But then I did it anyway.Hes been staying away . Will it last? So far, so good.

Boundaries are LIFE SAVING 🙌

mine said "i didnt expect you to ever leave me" after i finally broke up with him. after him manipulating me into staying after each time i told him i want to break up

When they say "I love you" hear "I own you" and it makes a lot more sense.

To many woman have walked away after 20+yes due to having enough. I was told I needed to stop before I ruined the rest of my life. Silence and holding my head up , standing strong isn't what they expect.

Thanks Lee, struggling with my situationship with my mid narcissist. Left him/moved out in Dec, went no contact for a month, fell off my wagon(he hoovered me good), trying to get back up. I needed to see this. 2 years 1/2 i tried to make things work. It’s twisted when they return your words to wake up to you. Praying that I can move forward, they really do break you down if you let them. Love shouldn’t hurt like this.

Yes. I also feel crazy. And he loves to reenforce the fact that I’m crazy. He just LOVES to argue with me and starts fights every night. I usually walk away but sometimes after a few weeks of him constantly nagging how I do nothing right I blow. Last night I blew. I took my dog and went to my bedroom. I’m tired and I’m exhausted from having the same old argument. I’m 67 and this man is the biggest mistake ever. My true love died in 2013 so I had to work 3 jobs to survive. I dated here and there and even tho it was scary financially sometimes I was happy and proud of myself. My apartment was immaculate etc etc. then came the love bomb. Swept me off of my feet. After almost 4 years of abuse I need to find the strength to leave so I can enjoy what days I have left. My body isn’t cooperating I have arthritis but I still look pretty good and I exercise. Please can someone tell me how you finally got the nerve to leave.

He told me that I was never going to leave him😂😂😂😂. I sent him love and did not argue. That day I blocked him. This was 2 years ago....I am free.

Lee you are right my ex never thought I would end our relationship. This Toxic relationship was the worst I had ever experienced. I would tell anyone prepare in silence to end it. My ex was going around telling everyone I was missing bec. after going to the emergency room, I stopped by the store bought nessities and got a hotel room for eight to nine days while my ex got served with PTO papers, I went to the police station and filed charges for my bruises on my arm and stomach from my ex punching me in my stomach. I filed and payed for an eviction notice. I did everything I could think of to get my ex legally out my home. I admit I had a good friend help me. When you have been broken, mentally drained it is hard , you are tired from all the verbal and physical abuse you might have encountered. I Thank my good friends, family, and some coworkers for being concerned for my well-being!!

He said I was “too masculine” simply because I would stand up for myself and call him out on his abusive bull shit.

I told mine that if he was the best I was ever going to get then I’d rather be alone the rest of my life. At least then I would have peace and joy would come every morning. I said, staying with him was going to be signing up for pain, chaos and sadness everyday for the rest of my life. I finished up by saying peace and joy versus pain, chaos and sadness; which would he choose? Well, I choose option A. He was absolutely dumbfounded when I looked him straight in the eyes and told him this. Like Lee said, he didn’t think I would ever leave much less leave to be alone just to get away from him!

It seriously gets better over time trust me

Am a narcissist worst nightmare..I've been married to one for 12 years...bring it on...at my grown age there's nothing I haven't seen under the sun...I study human every single day...reverse psychology works very well, am always one step ahead of these pathetic clowns

He said I’d have to cut my own arm off to stop myself from contacting him.. Well here I am, both arms intact. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Not saying it’s been easy, the love was real. But I respect myself too much to throw myself, my health, my life, responsibilities, and ambitions- all under a bus, just for love. I have to trust that life can bring good things without me having to abuse myself to have them. Trust 🙏

They expect you to breakdown and cry and always take them back. In the end, his behaviors didn't affect me at all. He used to text my daughter to ask if I was crying when I would ignore him. Lol. I feel so free now that Idgaf! 😌

I watch your videos every day. You’re helping me so much. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I’m devastated but your channel is helping me not feel crazy

Good people when we run out of patience its GONE

This is the best option, suggestion, move I've seen for the situation I'm in. It's empowering for me. I've listened to many of your episodes and I really enjoy it. Keep up the good work. She doesn't have control over me. I'm not just a puppet anymore. I'm respecting myself now.

SO TRUE!!! He really didn’t expect me to leave the country snd return to America on my own! YES, it was dramatic, however I DID IT!!! I said NO!!!

And some will double down and exhaust you to where you just let them do whatever because god knows how bad shall be thy rath. Man you keep ‘em coming with really interesting specifics that not all or other “narc informants” coined that one hella funny you may borrow. lol but for real wether professional mental health or self aware like you have really covered a lot of ground that if I had years ago I could spared myself a few narcs I’ve had 3 and my dad is one. But I’m narc free for several years now but I still am glued to this type of content because I can’t have any other creeping up in a way that could hurt or betray me and some of the validation I never got so this helps so much the long time un-had validation to instill what I need to stay narc free. Thank you 🙏

Am winning all the way not looking or going back thanks so much ❤

This is definitely true dealing with narcissistic litigants.

Thank you, you’re probably saving my life

One ex said they would cut my face up if I ever left, so that no one would ever want me again. Thankfully, I was able to leave the country. I would never felt safe staying there.

He thinks I'm a feminist because I've tried to put boundaries up.

So true. Had my ex yelling at me in public saying “I don’t want you in my life anymore!” So I left, went home by myself and cancelled his flight back home that *I* bought. He was PISSED. I felt bad after the fact and blamed myself for the silent treatment and “break up” but he got what he deserved lol. Oh well…

It was surprisingly easy to get rid of my narcissist ex once he tried to discard me. I just held him to his threats. What's been hard is getting him out of my psyche.