Somehow I've always seen you as an introvert. Because I'm exactly the same way. I like people very much, but there are maybe 5 people in the world whose company I would prefer to being alone. I like the quote by Charles Bukowski: "People empty me. I have to get away to refill". I think, it's very accurate. When I'm with people I feel fine and comfortable. But it's only when I'm alone that I can really be my true self, I do things I like and express myself in many different ways. I live in a dorm and I have a roommate. We rarely talk, but just her silent presence makes so much difference, I don't want to go home. Instead, I go to a mall and spend time there (doing my homework). And she's a really good girl!That's how I knew I was an introvert. Because to most people it doesn't matter that much, they feel comfortable anyway, and even prefer some company. Maybe, it's because they don't know what to do in their spare time apart from lying in bed with a phone and they quickly get bored, idk
I feel you! I'm definitely an introvert and society makes it seem like everyone has to be so outgoing and socially active. People think that there is something wrong with me if I often need to be alone and can't stand big groups of people, but that's just how I am. We are nothing less because of that.
Same I love being alone. I personally don't have any friends, I have acquaintances but I don't have people who'd I consider in my life as my friends. Sometimes these acquaintances ask me out to spend the weekend or do something social but I always say no. I love being at home in my space. Sometimes coworkers or classmates try to get close to me and be friendly but I always seem to willingly drift away from them. I just don't really like having people around me. I mean I want to have maybe one or two people whom I could call a friend but no seems to live up to my expectations. As usual Emy I completely understand you, thank you for shedding light on this subject!
I have always known I am an introvert! I love interacting with people and making close friendships but new people cause me a lot of anxiety and exhaustion and if I'm meeting a lot of new people at once, I do need to just take a step back and spend some time with myself before I'm ready to be around people again, even if it's just once evening of me time :-) I worry I sometimes come across as rude because I'm not comfortable in big groups of new people!
I have a really good friend, that is an introvert, like myself. We like doing our own things, but in the company of one another, and talking every once in a while. Like I'll be painting, and she'll be reading, and we can just be quiet and listen to music. Not having the pressure, of forcing a conversation is wonderful, and so easy, bc we both mutually understand that we like being quite together. i love her sm
This video made me feel so comfortable. Everything you said... It could easily being me talking. Like you, I moved out to a big city (ok, mine isn't big as Paris, but ok) and I leave my friends, I changed my routine, I got depressive and anxious all the time. And tired. Very tired. And I started to feel guilty about feeling tired when I was around people. It was getting me more and more anxious and sad. I mean, I live in Brazil. People here are super extroverted, being introverted is almost a disease, and it made me feel so wrong, like I was sick or broke. But I realized, after reading a lot about introversion, that it is completely normal. I'm not wrong, or sick, or broke. I'm just that girl who loves being with her self around books. that's not bad. So I don't have to feel bad or guilty about it. I'm trying hard to respect who I am and ask for others to respect me too. I don't want to be sad and anxious like I used to do, and I think I can make it embracing my introverted personality. Well, I think I end up saying too much. I just want to thank you for talking about it. You're helping a lot of people who feel the same way. Thanks.
I always strive for a buzzing social life and to have loads of people around me 24/7. However, when I do go out with people I often feel completely zapped of energy and wish I was back at home eating sweet potato and reading a book :')
acknowledging my introvertedness gives me a sense of freedom. i don't need other's approval to spend time alone and i'm incredibly choosey as to how i'm interacting with people. it stresses me out too. though i am often seen as someone unafraid to interact, to organize, to facilitate it's really a part of me i need to strengthen but understand my own boundaries. I'm really sensitive and I need solitude to decompress. I think it is really good timing that you spoke about this. I was on the brink of throwing out all my books because I have a concentration problem and haven't read much for years and been stockpiling them for a rainy day. i took a test once i got 31 for extrovert and 30 for introvert. it makes me sad that i didn't see my childhood for reading alone as joy for a long time just loneliness. a mix i suppose. i am more awake now to being happy. i have a few good friends and family. it just hurts when there is too much going on and i really lose myself my center. and it's also the constant giving as a teacher/facilitator/as a friend. it's easy to burn out. that's why i started painting. anyhow, my first embarrassing vlog is going to be up this morning. I want to VLOG. for a happier healthier year. you really make a difference emy. i can face my realities
We need our time alone, our solitude. But I realised that too much time spent alone can be unhealthy. Loneliness kicks in. I believe that I am an introvert as well.
Wow, everything you have said is exactly how I feel! I am definitely an introvert myself, however, like you said, I am a warm person. I enjoy having deep and meaningful relationships with people, but I enjoy my meetings with them to be short and sweet, and then I enjoy just being alone, doing my own things. I also find after I have been in social situations, I feel exhausted. My parents are introvert themselves but I believe they don't want me to pick up their "traits" as they say. They themselves are friendly and have friends but they need their own space. They are always encouraging me to make loads of friends when in reality, I enjoy my few close friends. I do make friends when I feel like I really "click" with that person. I am however confident at parties and social events. When most people meet me I'm sure they would never believe I am an introvert. Only until people truly get to know me would they realise. After being around people for too long I feel like I need to retreat and recharge my energy alone. The only person I can be around and not feel the need to "recharge" is my boyfriend. But I only see him once-twice a week so perhaps I am not around him enough to realise, but I spend the night or two at his and thats a lot for me.
Hi Emy, I recommend you look into Elaine N. Aron's research on HSPs (highly sensitive people) and maybe read her book The Highly Sensitive Person. Being highly sensitive means being prone to overstimulation or overarousal (what you described when you said you don't like too much noise or too many things going on around you because they make you exhausted). This is because we process things differently (more intensely) than non-HSPs, so obviously we get exhausted sooner. It's not a bad thing :) Discovering the research on HSPs really helped me understand myself better and understand that it is totally fine to need some "me-time". Btw, HSPs are often introverts, but there are also HSPs who are extroverts. Another thing that is interesting about the book is the passage on our pause-to-check (inhibition) system vs our activation system. For extroverts, the latter tends to be much stronger, whereas for purely introverted people the former tends to be much stronger. But it is also possible that both are pretty much equally strong (this is the way it is for me), which often causes a dilemma because there are many things you want to do, but you're also a bit worried about what may happen if you do. Sorry for the long comment, I just though you might find this interesting, haha! Keep it up, I love your videos :)
Great video. You pretty much described my life, word for word. I thought something was wrong with me and I felt bad about being this way. But I realized I can't escape it, it's who I am. It's who we are. Let's embrace it. :)
This is crazy. I spend 80% of my time alone and 20% with other people. Like you when im around people im outspoken, passionate, and social, Im an extrovert! Eventually though i just get this feeling of wanting to be alone to either read, write, do something to just develop my intellectual capabilities, to just think and be alone. People see introverts as cynical or lonely or generally odd but I believe we can understand ourselves and the world around us better. I also had an anxiety and depression disorder which kindve led to the whole desire to be alone thing. For me i think introverts solve their own problems better; they dont need friends or attention to distract them from deep self-analyzation. You're the first person that really seems to have the same traits i do. You should check out Koi Fresco here on youtube i KNOW you'll love his channel.
I feel almost the same as you! But I don't have friends in my town that I can trust. I don't tell them about my feelings, they wouldn't take it seriously. But that's ok, I love being alone and having my time just for myself. Also you have a really nice voice and I love you and your videos!
Ca va faire un peu bateau de dire ça, mais tu n'es pas la seule :) Personnellement (puisqu'on est ici pour raconter notre vie) (j'ai 20 ans, pour info), je suis seulement en train de me rendre compte de ces choses-là : cela me fatigue de voir des gens, bien que je les aime très fort et que je veille à ce qu'ils aillent bien, cela me fatigue de sortir tout court, de faire des soirées, de même chercher à aller en soirée, etc. Evidemment, c'est déplaisant de se dire ça, parce que quelque part ça nous renvoie à notre "anormalité", ou je sais pas... J'ai comme l'impression que rester chez soi, aimer être seul et passer ses soirées à boire des tisanes est jugé par la société comme quelque chose de fastidieux, que ça fait de nous quelqu'un de bizarre, sans valeur, pas sociable, enfin je sais pas trop comment dire. Récemment, je me suis pris dans la gueule un "mais ta vie est plan-plan !", et très sincèrement ça m'a blessée au plus profond parce que je me suis sentie jugée en tant qu'être par rapport à la société jeune. Mais à la réflexion, et de manière très rationnelle, je pense qu'il vaut mieux ne pas se poser de questions, parce qu'au fond c'est toujours le même problème : la normalité, bla bla. Au pire on est comme on est et voilà, pas la peine de se théoriser. Soyons plutôt heureux en mangeant des bananes :)
What a lovely and remarkable video. Thank you. You are wise beyond your years.! I have lived a very public professional life, yet, like you, am an introvert. When I occasionally (rarely) mention this, it is a shock to many, but not to those few who know me well. I have come to the conclusion that being introverted allows me to savor "choice moments" in life. Friends who are true extroverts seem (to me) to be always rushing from one thing to another. (This is not a negative judgement). Knowing who I actually am is very freeing. I have no fear that I am somehow "missing out" on life. I deeply treasure it.
Omg, this is totally me. This video helped me so much understanding myself a little but more, thank you so much for sharing! I very often feel that it is quite difficult to understand ourself but also to express our feelings and be clear with others. Sometimes people don't understand that I like to be alone and at the same time I also like to be around my close friends times to times and travel, explore etc.
I think everybody is an introvert and extravert at the same time. I think we need a balance between being on our own and socializing. I think being introvert is necessary for reflection, figuring out things about yourself, and reaching harmony inside. I think we should work on both aspects equally cause both are requied to grow and become happy.That's what I think based on what I experienced and how I feel. I love to be on my own, in my own space. But being with someone I love, even if it's tiring, makes me feel like life makes sense. I makes sense anyway, cause it's beautiful, but without love and attachment to other people this beauty wouldn't have shined so brightly.
I don't think I'm "ambivert". It's not just me, I see it in other people as well. My point is that even though there are people who tend to be more social or less from the beginning (with that I agree), all people are more complicated than that, it depends on many things and can change in course of time. And I think it'd be great to develop both sides, both aspects.
Anissiya Artemova I know what you mean :-) Saying "I'm an extrovert" or "I'm an introvert" is like putting yourself in a box. For an example: I'm extremely introverted when I'm around a lot of people - but I'm also extremely extroverted when I have to talk with new people and I can be pragmatic. So I get your point about people being more complex than that.
you always struck me as *such* an introvert, actually as a typical INFJ, if you've heard of the MBTI (I don't give much credit to the MBTI but it applies well to some people and helped me figure myself out immensely in my very early 20s). The whole not liking to go to parties, reflecting deeply on things and not being influenced by other people's judgements & opinions, not needing external approval to validate your beliefs, being so intuitive and able to listen to and put words onto your own feelings, ie being in tune with your inner self, etc. Introverts can appear extremely extraverted when around trusted friends. So their friends & families don't see them as introverted. I have the same issue. I was shocked when I first heard the way people quite close to me see me (assertive, smiley, outgoing, extremely friendly) compared to my own view of myself (condescending, prone to depressed moods, always thinking). Then I realised that I keep all of these defining things to myself and a few people I can count on with one hand, in order to fit in or because they are too personal. Also, introverts can be extremely confident and self assured. People misunderstand shyness and lack of confidence for introversion but it's not the case. Some of those introverts are pretty scary though haha. Also the wackiest people I've ever met were generally introverts, which is a good thing :)
embrace your introvertedness! It's not a bad thing, just something you have to accept in yourself and learn to arrange your life in such a way that you thrive.
I relate, I love speaking about my opinions and doing new things but I rather do a lot of things on my own and would rather be at home than with others even though i enjoy their company. It's not as bad as its made out to be though, you should see it as strength:)
Emy, enjoy exploring your introversion! It's nothing to feel embarrassed about, there are tons of us in varying degrees of social comfort. I've found that the trick is to know and acknowledge when you're worn out and let yourself take a weekend for yourself and recharge. It makes a whole world of difference for us introverts. ^_^
When I'm with people they think I'm weird cause I'm a bit quiet,but I think they're weird cause they're judging me without even knowing me .. I feel u girl .
Great video :D i moved back home after 10yrs in the military. After experiencing different cultures and people, it has changed my interest in everyday life. It's hard to relate to my friends anymore. My anxiety problems from the military doesn't help neither. My closest friends do know how i am, but i rather enjoy doing things alone.
Wow, you have just explained everything that I have been feeling for the last 1.5 years! Just before I was about to turn 25 I suddenly felt myself becoming more introverted. It didn't happen overnight but gradually. Fast forward until now I find myself thinking did I alienate myself and become an introvert? I used to be very social and have a big social group of friends. It started when I started to get adult acne.. Maybe there's a correlation? Or maybe it's a variety of things.. I feel very tired being around "friends" or even on the phone with them.. I can totally relate to what you are saying.. Sometimes I think though - if I never went through acne, would I have alienated myself and developed an "introverted" personality. I can be an extrovert if I really want to be, but I feel so tired and ashamed afterwards when I replay everything in my head. I never used to do that when I was extroverted.
I am very much an introvert, I love being alone it's one of my favorite things. In high school I was a loner and I felt kind of sad because I thought I needed to be hanging out with people to have a good time. It wasn't until right after high school that I realized how much I actually liked just being by myself.
Hey Emy! I've found you last week and I really appreciate your videos, your view on things and your personality as well :-) You are so inspiring! And I can relate to you about many things too. Thank you
Hey Emy! I know exactly what you mean. I'm the same way when I am around a whole bunch of people I just want to sneak off and be by myself for a while. Then when I'm alone sometimes I feel trapped inside myself and need to get out and be around other people and again I wonder why I came out in the first place and go back to being alone. Quite a vicious cycle indeed. And thus will always be the struggle of being an introvert.
Your shared thoughts are appreciated, and as mention by others but in adding there upon, I think part of what draws introverted people into social awareness and concern is our typically heightened empathy, which then lends naturally to what might deceptively appear as extroverted organization and activity ^^;
That's freaking me out. We both have born at the same day and you're talking about the same shit I feel every single day. Sometimes it's ok, but sometimes I feel depressed because of being alone
Around 5 or 6 years ago, I realised that I showed all the signs of being an introvert. Which was a strange thing for me because, all through school, I'd ALWAYS been a very sociable and outgoing person. But, when I left school and attended college for a year, I became aware of how much I enjoyed my own company. I felt like I didn't always want to hang around with people I barely knew, all the time. That being said, I still enjoyed, and do to this day, the company of my family and my close friends. So, ultimately, I've come to the conclusion that, although introverts like to be alone sometimes, we don't like to be lonely.
I share the same feeling!!! I am very outgoing when I am with my good friends but other wise I am so introvert! I like to talk to plp, meet with plp, go out with friends and do something. Those are essential for me but I may only need them in 40% of my life....I feel exhausted after a long day talk to plp, try to be fun and the be center of crowd. I appreciate when I can just be home, be unwind, drink tea, watch movies and cook. I love to be around with someone who understand me and I don't need to over-explain myself but they get it.
I understand the struggle , today i spent the day with my friend since morning until the evening and now im so happy having sometime with myself i was this close kicking them out haha not that i hate spending time with them is just too tiring for me to hang around people for long period of time :/ , in past i tried hard to be as outgoing as i can but i just cant continue lying to myself to please people i need my me time ;)
I'm going through a similar confusion. I like to go have fun as you said and be with people but at the same time I dislike it. I have this friend who I rarely see and I want to go visit them but at the same time I don't want to. it's not that I hate that persons I just don't know what the feeling is. I enjoy being around people but only if I'm not talking to them. only rarely do I engage a conversation with someone completely random.
Many people said it here already so i'll just say the short version: being an introvert just means that your mental energy gets drained from social situations as opposed to an extrovert who needs those interactions to get mental energy. It doesn't mean you don't enjoy those social interactions, just that you find them tiring in some situations or for long periods of time. (Fuck that wasn't that short, whatever...) But I think that definition suits you and I'm not surprised that you're an introvert. I've always known I was a introvert but when I really understood what that meant, I got so much better dealing with that, even with my depression and anxiety. And society sort of force us to all be extroverts but you'll find a lot of writers, composers, thinkers you like were also introverts because like you, they were deep thinkers, which is something I really admire in you. And I personally love being alone but hate feeling alone, which can happen even when I'm in social situations.
Hey, I'm introverted and it seems you are talking about me! haha I feel exactly the same way, to go out and see people often makes me tired and I have a real problem when people invite me to go out, because I usually don't wanna go. But when I do go out, I feel so good! You know, I used to think I didn't like people, but I was wrong because it makes me happy to be with my friends and have a nice chat. It is really awkward to feel this way, happy but tired at the same time. I think I understand you perfectly well. :)
Interesting perspective. I've always known I was introverted, even before I knew that word. It's closely linked with my identity. I've also always been silly, and I do like to perform (dancing, playing the flute), but I absolutely need my alone time to recharge. And I actively avoid overstimulating situations, which is unfortunate for a music lover.
when i realize that iam an introvertiert..i think i was 21 years old. it was like an epiphany for me. did you heard about the myer Briggs test? its a test about which personalitytyp you are..you can make this test online. greets from germany
+aya gab same for me! I didn't know that I was "introverted" until 20. I discovered Tumblr and it was like a revelation because there is a huge community of introvert there, a lot of testimonies and articles about it. It helped me to understand who I really am. Before that, I always felt so different but in a bad way, but now I enjoy myself, this is who I am and I like it =) and another INFP here ^^
It's prob why in a way I liked night shift better in a way - less drama but if I wanted to talk I would but sometimes I just don't like people up in my face so I totally feel what ur saying!
I think anxiety disorders and depression may correlate with being an introvert. I know as I child I was very shy but I became more outgoing as I got older. Then in my late teens I developed what my doctor called "severe depression and generalized anxiety disorder" which my therapist said was possibly triggered by ptsd from a childhood trauma. I know many other introverts with similar backgrounds.
YESSS :) Can't wait to watch, I'm an introvert too. Quiet but by no means shy. I love everything you have to say in your videos. I just began watching at the end of last year... :) I think I can count how many times I've gone out partying. And, when I say party, it's like a more subdue house party not clubbing. I love staying at home, being an only child facilitates this trait I think! I love being on my own, going for walks. It's something I've had to work on with starting a new relationship :) I would love more videos hearing about how teaching is still going for you. Et aussi, is Emy your name or Antastesia? Is Emy a nickname derived from Antastesia? Haha, it might be... Bisous de Canada xx
Introversion is really about gaining energy from being alone vs gain energy from social interaction... not so much necessarily not liking being around people or not liking crowds. It's a range. My best friend us highly introverted and doesn't like crowds or dealing with people. I'm introverted, but on a lesser percentile (something like 70% vs her 90+%), and I love blending into a big crowd and I have patience with the public, I don't mind asking for help in stores, etc. But I do require down time by myself or I feel drained really quickly. ...I don't remember what test we took to get those percentages... but it was interesting. It might have been when we were playing with the Myers-Briggs...
yeah i dont really like to be around people. 1 on 1 is fine, but like birthday parties or whatever im ready to go home already lol. the idea of going to a club is like why the fuck do people go to those? its fun for them, but sounds horrible to me.
for me it's the opposite. a lot of people consider me an introvert (which I am). When i was in third grade i had to see the school psychologist b/c i became so anxious when the teacher pushed our desks together and we had to sit in groups. my (distant) family members think i'm cold because i don't like to talk (mainly due to my being shy, but mostly because i don't like them haha). but mostly with people i'm close with i talk WAY too much, and consider myself to be outgoing, which contradicts what everyone else thinks of me. i find it fascinating how people need to define other people one way or another. like there's no complexity or grey area in people's personalities.
Don't forget, there's a spectrum, with introverted at one end, ambivert (both) in the middle, and extroverted at the other end, with you somewhere between them. It might help to think about it more flexibly and less black and white, as it really is a complex thing. I read that there's a part of the brain that gauges social stimulus, and extroverts need more stimulus for it to reach the ''fully satisfied'' level, whereas introverts need less stimulus. Hence when an introvert gets too much stimulus, they can be overwhelmed by all the activity and want to relax and be alone so they can breathe and think. Extroverts can get to that point too, it just takes longer. Perhaps you are more 60 percent introvert 40 extrovert, or something. If you are interested in this and other mental processes, try to take the free Meyers briggs psychological personality evaluation test. It's called the meyers briggs mbti. Also, preferring to schedule things doesn't have much to do with extroversion, only with how much order you prefer in life. This test also checks for whether you prefer more structured planning, or to go with the flow like me, it should be a useful tool fo learning how to understand how your brain processes information. I'm an enfp.
Imagine everyone's on a scale of 1 to 10, introvert to extrovert. It's not all black or white. It's just your preference, and yes you were right to talk about energy. Do you feel more energized by people or your own thoughts? That is the key. Shyness or talkativeness has nothing to do with it. I'm an introvert, but am much more friendly and chatty with strangers than some extroverts that I'm close to.
Man, it sounds like you're all over the place. I think it's good that you now have a new passion and desire for being alone. With aloneness, -calmness, will come _clarity._ I hope every day for you is enjoyable. -Ghost
And I share this exact trait too :( All these personality traits that you've talked about must be all somewhat related. When I hear you speak about these it feels like you're another me if it makes sense.
+Antastesia do you talk to camera because sometimes it's easier than talking face to face, but it allows you to vent some of the thoughts running through your head?
En plus d'être introvertie, je suis quasiment certaine que tu es une INFJ! C'est l'un des résultats possibles au test de personnalité Myers Briggs. Je pense à cela car pour moi tu te distingues surtout par tes convictions fortes et ta grande sensibilité. Tu devrais jeter un œil à ce test, je suis sûre sûre sûre que ça t'apprendra des choses sympathiques!
I'm an introvert who comes off as an extrovert as well. I used to really want to be an extrovert instead of what I am, but I had to accept that I'm not
hi thank u for uploading videos i really like all of them because i can relate with you soul to soul and yeah im sounding cheesy but for real i saw you the first time when u upload that why u dont like kids video ur thoughts and reason connect with mine and all ur vlogs that u love animals and u love nature tripping and stuff. dont know what to say really cus its so scary for me that every sentiment you had connects with my thoughts .im also d funny one in d family and stuff but i prefer to be alone most of the time ..go somehwere read or research and animals i si love animals and i value little things inmlife even if most people might find it absurd.its really hard cus i cant understand myself sometines and its hard to relate with most people and stuff.but yeah i can write more but this might turn into a novel.lol love u! hugs from the Philippines -Chelsea, 22 ♥♥♥
I'm 17 and I've always known I'm an introvert, but there's this misconception that introverted people are shy or are antisocial, so people start thinking you don't want to be with people ever or you're a hermit that stays home all the time.
I think there is always a stigma against being an introvert, acknowledged or not. Acting in an extraverted way is seen as a "service" or commodity that we are expected to provide to other people. We are a species that depends on social interaction and social energy. All this means that as an introvert you have to work harder than most people. It's not fair, but life's not fair!
Women can be both introverts and extroverts, depending where we are in our cycles. Some weeks I love seeing friends and going out, and some weeks all I want to do is stay in bed and read. Both are fine. We need balance in life. And I think there is a misconception that introverts are shy and not confident - it was a real eye-opener for me when I realised that although on the whole I prefer my own company, and am cautious of people, I'm confident in who I am and what I believe and think to be right.
1 Peter 5:6-9 6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. 7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 8 Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings. Sincerely, God's Watchman Jacob
szoszk Know this, God loves you so much, even so, that he came, and died for you. God thinks your worth it, if you don't. John 14:27 27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
