a lot of people think that trans people can only be in t4t (trans + trans) relationships, but as a trans guy who's been with a queer cis guy for 4.5 years, you can definitely understand each other without needing to be t4t! labels are labels, but people are people. labels are just words and all that matters is that you love each other and communicate. (ex. being with a trans person doesn't mean a cis gay man isn't gay anymore!) lovely video as always, i've been watching your videos for longer than i could remember
as a transmasc, i've only been exclusively t4t because i'd feel incredibly guilty if i was with a cis dude. i know i'm not deceiving anybody but idk why i feel like they're better off with a cis guy than me.
@@minamii8575 Reading this broke my heart. It is exactly how I felt when I found my boyfriend- I fell for him so hard, but felt like he’d be better off with anyone but me because I’m trans. Thankfully he was adamant on making me feel loved and worthy as I am, and to see the beauty in myself that he sees in me. I truly hope you are able to see that within you one day too. Sending all my love and best wishes❤
It always means so much to me to hear from other people in the same situation- I remember how alone I felt with it, thank you so much for sharing❤️ and exactly! Labels are just made up categories, love doesn’t always fit into a box, sometimes it goes beyond them and I think that can be even more beautiful🥰 wishing lots of love and happiness for you and your darling x
Awh your partner is so down to earth and really open! Really heartwarming to hear yous both talk about these things. I’ve had a lot of transphobia from other gay guys on dating apps so idk, it’s nice to hear there are people out there who aren’t dicks 😅
Omg, I've just noticed Kai's cup. 🤣Love it. On another note, I really appreciate this video and the conversation. I feel like so many of us have similar worries and fears inside our minds...and hearing them voiced and deconstructed by somebody else out loud is just so...relieving? Cathartic? Kai seems lovely. And, obviously, you are too!
Thank you so much for this. I always seek out people’s feelings and thoughts on situations they’re going through that are the same as mine. However with this specific topic the resources have been sparse, so I am overjoyed that we could be that for someone else❤ you’re definitely not alone! Also, yes, he’s very proud of that cup😆 in my most unbiased opinion (if that’s even possible) he is indeed lovely- and thank you x
You two seem really well attuned to each other, which is very darling and lovely to see. I am happy for you both :) And I think you both embody the meme/phrase "Find someone who looks at you the way [insert person] does" in the best possible way. Both of you look at the other with so much care and attention. It's really sweet :) Now, I myself may be an aroace. But I'm still commenting for the algorithm because as Kovu said in the beginning there certainly is a need for people in similar situations (or who might find themselves in a similar situation soon-ish) to find positive representation. And even outside of the whole cis and trans thing I also think that the internet in general could use representation of couples like you who showcase such loving, caring, attentive and respectful (though still also calm & straightforward) conduct with each other,
Thank you SO MUCH for these incredibly kind words🥺 I’ll admit, I’m always so fascinated to hear how other people perceive how I (/we) come across, I think it’s something about not being able to see myself from an outside perspective, and the curiosity that follows :P So hearing us described with so much care and love means so much to me. And thank you so much for what you said about not being able to relate, but commenting anyway to boost this video because you think the representation is important. I love when people of different underrepresented groups can wish each other well and support each other, so truly thank you❤️
17:00 What you said about projection is so relatable. I'm not in a romantic relationship, nor have I ever been, but I do the same thing with friends, the more I care about them and their opinions of me, the worse it gets. And I've been aware of this and was able to articulate it before and also felt guilty about it, but I could never really get myself to stop. I feel like hearing it from someone else helps though, for whatever reason. So thanks for that :)
This was recommended to me randomly on my feed, and I’m glad it was. I’ve never dated anyone at 22, not casually or serious or anything, and sometimes I worry I never will because of a multitude of factors, a couple of which relate to my gender. Hearing these experiences helps a lot.
A lot of your former/current thoughts really resonate with me as a trans guy. Thanks so much for making this video- it’s so honest and genuine to the core!
This was really nice thank you for talking about it! Me and my partner are t4t, but they are trans fem with little to no dysphoria, and im trans masc with a lot of dysphoria, and we have had pretty different experiences when it comes to dating and being intimate. But at the same time we appreciate each other's differences and we are able to be open about how we feel. When i first came out i didn't think i would find love at all, but that wasn't true, and seeing you two on instagram gave me so much hope that i would one day find the one. Me and my partner have only been together for 5 months but I really think they are the ONE. If you are thinking about making another video about being long distance that would be pretty cool, since we have to be long distance for a whole year now before maybe being able to move inn togheter after that, and i really miss them all the time so yeah if you have any tips on that please share them
I relate my partner is a trans woman but she has lots of bottom dysphoria (i had tons of bottom dysphoria before i had phallo) we are t4t and she is my first gf i had (my last relationship was a situationship) we are also both asexual and also long distance i enjoy reading other t4t stories :)
I loved watching this video and seeing how you guys interact with each other, and as somebody who has been here watching your videos forever, it makes me really happy seeing you so happy Kovu. This is exactly the relationship you deserve. Somebody who treating so well! I hope you guys do more videos like this again some time!
Hi Sweetie! Yayyyyyyyyy, a long video! Labels, labels. Getting kind of tired of labels. If you decide to identify as a Spotted Purple People Eater, you will still be my Kovu!
Bahaha thank you Shala!! I am so tired of them too - the words to describe our orientation and gender identity are just made up. We´re people who love other people
@@Kovukingsrod Agreed. I just started it. I need to go make some phone calls while offices are still open. Will come back to this later. Let Kai know that you are all in my nightly prayers. Miss you! xo
@@Kovukingsrod There, Kovu...you`ve admitted it, quote; ` the words to describe our orientation and gender identity are just made up.` Yes, non-binary, demigirl, genderfluid, agender, graysexual etc That`s all made up. The basic `male, female, straight, gay` are all based on biological, physical reality`, and the straight male and straight female keeps the human race going. It seems your fans may be slower in getting the message.
Very nice video!! Kai is so sweet and I wish more people didn't overthink that much who they are or what they like tbh. I think this video just reinforces the idea of that you just fall for a person and that everyone is different and therefore every relationship is different. It's so nice to see how close you two are and how much you know each other and care about each other and it shows that being gay or cis or trans or whatever isn't a big deal, if you get on with someone or if you love someone, you just get on with them or love them for who they are, as whole, and that's it. Thank you to both of you so much for this video, as I'm also a transmasc queer non binary person who's a bit scared of not finding a partner at some point of their life. Also, it's great it's long and you covered different topics.
Yes, but in many countries in the world, gay men can not be in a relationship. Lesbian women can not declare their love openly. Kovu and her straight relationship is totally outside of that, and is totally okay anywhere in the world, no matter how `butch` she thinks she looks (which she doesn`t, as she`s off the t and looks female now). Let`s forget about these dull pretenders and concentrate on the horrors awaiting gay men and lesbian women in Russia and Africa.
Это так мило и круто. Немного больно видеть такую жизнь когда ты из россии - зависть берет. Но зато очень много узнаю и понимаю, что где-то такое больше в норме. Я верю, что когда-нибудь я и мои друзья сможем найти себе место и любовь. Спасибо за видео!
@@_dazai_soukoku No, I’m just pointing out that the word gay has conventionally meant attracted to the same-sex and trans ideologues and proponents have redefined it for themselves. But not for me.
Before watching this video randomly recommended to me by ALAL (the Almighty Algorithm), I want to complement you on that awesome Welsh prideflag! I love it ❤
I like how people only discard Harry Potter now that its author has fallen out of political favour, as opposed to Harry Potter always being total shit.
im so glad ive rediscovered your channel on my home screen omg, i used to watch your videos all the time when i was like 12 and figuring out my gender and now im 18 and transitioning :p i hope you are well , thank you for helping me figure things out
