Once I tried to say ‘all good’ and ‘okay’ to my mother at the same time, ended up saying ‘all gay’. She smiled and thanked me for describing our family.
I used to be that one kid who's always late for school, and once when entering the school library, instead of 'Good morning" I habitually said "Sorry, I'm late".
I once hit someone with my swinging lunchbox and i tried to say 'sorry' and 'oops' at the same time and then ended up shouting at some random student, 'SOUP'
one time i tried saying "i want to go home" and "man i'm tired" but ended up screaming "I WANT A MAN" at my friend while passing them in the school hallway... i had to wait two hours before i could explain myself 💀
Was trying to tell a girl named Rebecca that she left behind her water bottle. I WANTED to say,” Rebecca, your water bottle!” but I couldn’t form the words and was panicking because she was walking away and I yelled, “Rebotabottle!” and everyone looked so confused 💀
Imagine you're interviewing someone and they say "Pleasure to beat you" Now it depends on your personality but that's either an instant hire or an instant denial
Once, after I grew my hair out, my sister wanted to say “So how’s the long hair life going?”, but ended up somehow getting all the words correct, but the order wrong, and she tried like 5 times to say it correctly without breaking, so it came out as “How go hair long the life going the long hair going treat the long hair” etc for about a minute
Still remember the time when I was trying to explain something to my daughter and her friend but I kept stuttering and stumbling over my words. I tried to say "My tongue isn't working" and "I'm tripping over my words" at the same time and what actually came out was "My tongue is twerking." I've never seen two teens drop the the ground in a fit of laughter so fast.
Most of these just end up being more intimidating than what was intended, like, if I was walking past someone and said excuse me and they replied “no” I would be intimidated immediately
one time i was telling a person about when i got my ears pierced at a tattoo shop with a needle when i was like 8 and i tried to say “ i bawled my eyes out” and “i cried” and i almost said “i cried my balls out” 😭😭
Here's one that's actually permanently altered my vocabulary: When I was leaving from a visit to my mum, she meant to say either "Goodbye" or "Love you", but it came out as "Good love!". Ever since then, that's been our go-to phrase for bidding each other farewell.
Reminds me of the time when I was around 12-13 that my mom wished me "good night, poopy!" I think she was trying to say "peep," one of my family nicknames, but it somehow got horribly mangled.
Back when I was a girl scout, I had been doing hours long cookie sales. This was when I'd read to my parents before bed bc I love reading. I came out of my room to ask if they were ready for storytime, and I deadpan asked my parents if they wanted to buy some girl scout cookies Edit: My mom bought us some thin mints to split earlier that day
Yesterday I was at the mall and accidentally took someone's bag instead of mine and they were like "oh it happens it's ok" and I tried to both laugh and say "yeah sorry" at the same time and it came out with a wheezing "yhooos"
The dreaded “Are You F*cking Sorry” phenomenon. Once I was trying on bras with my mom, and instead of saying “negativity,” I said “negatitity”. We laughed for a good five minutes.
I literally once tried to say to a person who was helping me pick up some stuff “Thanks man” and “I appreciate it” and it came out as “I appreciate men.”
During a game of D&D, one player was describing his character. He wanted to say "they were raised by snakes" and "they were raised by pythons" at the same time and just said "they were raised by bikes".
*"it's a B A N O O N"* took me out💀 Just imagining some random yelling that in a public space and everyone else having zero context is just fricking hilarious. I like to think they said it exactly how Matt said it too, makes it even funnier somehow 💀
One time I was trying to say both "My mother gave birth to me" and "When I was Born" at the same time, and it ended up as "When I gave birth to my mother"
One time while eating dinner with my family, my mother wanted to ask me whether or not I want to eat with a chopstick. However, the words became jumbled and instead came out as *"Eat the chopstick."*
One time I was buying some snacks from a dollar store that I went to frequently. They always asked me about some program and if I wanted to donate so I expected them to ask about it again. Here’s what happened. Cashier: “alright your good to go, have a nice day!😊” Me: “Oh… No thank you” *Proceeds to walk out of store*
My mum did something similar once. At the store where we would usually do our grocery shopping, at the end, the cashier would always hold up the receipt and ask, "Do you want the receipt?", and my mum would almost always answer, "Don't need that, thank you!" This one time, it was a different cashier or some new store policy had changed the script or whatever, but now, it suddenly went like this: Cashier (holding up receipt): Have a nice day! My mum (cheerful tone): Don't need that, thank you!
One time I tried to tell my overexcited dog "no biting" but I just ended up whispering "no homo" to her. She proceeded to very purposefully scratch my foot
While exchanging my spoon for a fork at dinner, my mother asked why. I tried to say "I eat my eggs with a spoon" and "getting a fork" and ended up telling her, with a smile on my face, "I eat my forks"
So one time I accidentally bumped into someone named Avery, they said I'm sorry, to which I attempted to respond "I'm sorry" and "my fault entirely" and somehow said "soon Avery" and continued walking
Not to long ago my mom asked me if her outfit for a fancy dinner looked ok and I tried to say “ it looks great” and “ it looks ok” looked her dead in the eye and said “ it looks gay” 💀
I was waiting tables at one of my old jobs and tried saying "enjoy your food" and "enjoy your meal" at the same time. I ended up saying "Enjoy your mood. Enjoy your... feel... uhhh... enjoyyourfood" before walking away embarrassed.
I got my words mixed up once and said at my graduation ceremony out of pure excitement. I thought of saying “this is the greatest day of my life” but then someone bumped into me, so “excuse me” passed into my mind. The result? “This is the greatest excuse of me.”
I once tried to say “happy birthday” and “have a good night” at the same time, and what came out of my mouth was “happy good bird.” (It’s been two years and I still get teased for it)
Today I was talking to friends about religion and tried to say “I used to be Catholic but now I’m non-denominational” and accidentally said “I used to be Catholic but now I’m Catholic”
Earlier today someone apologized for taking a while to take a seat, I attempted to say "it's alright" and "no worries" at the same time. I said "it's all worries."
One time when I was walking through my crowded work cafeteria I meant to say “it smells like burnt popcorn in here” but instead I said, loudly, “it smells like burnt cop porn in here!” I swear everyone got quiet.
Going with the theme of this video, my sister once wanted to say Pepper (the name of one of my pet rats) likes to be lazy but, she was thinking of something being boiled so she said "Pepper likes to be boiled" and I was like "EXcUSe Me?"
this morning at work I was trying to explain to a girl where to find a certain book. between “the P section is very large” and “there’s a lot of books in the P section” I said,,, “there’s a lot of pee” while staring at her intensely
like last week this guy threw his locker door into me and after realizing his mistake, muttered “oh, my bad”. me, debating on whether saying “you’re good” or “you’re okay” i stared this poor man dead in the eye and proclaimed: “you’re gay.”
Oh, another story - my friend and I were walking to our next class when two boys passed us. We heard one very enthusiastically yell, “I’m going to slurp up Adam’s arm in physics!!” We both took a couple seconds to process that before I asked… “did you hear that??” It still makes us laugh whenever we bring it up lol
I once tried to say "scoot over" and move over an inch" at the same time and accidentally said "move over a skinch" and now my family regularly uses skinch as a word meaning a little bit
It’s literally a word that means just that. 😂It makes sense because it is a real word. How many people who know English have you told this story to and they’ve just stared at you like “are you taking the piss?” But have just politely smiled and nodded?😅
I was once teaching my cousin how to play Minecraft, I made a little arena full of Vindicators for her. I was going to say "Careful, they'll swing their axe at you." I instead said "Careful, they'll swing their ass at you."
I once accidentally punched my sister in the face cause she scared me, ended up yelling “are you sorry!?” I felt really weird for a split second until she yelled back “NO!” Then we both just laughed it off
One time my show choir director was trying to say “you sit” and “you watch the show” at the same time and ended up saying to a room full of immature high school students: “you shit”
I was worried I was being a burden on my friends when we were looking for this cat tower someone left outside(so I could upcycle it) and I couldn't decide on 'sorry for the wild goose chase' and ' sorry for making yall run around like headless chickens' Which somehow translated to 'Sorry for the chicken cheeks'
when I was a bit younger, I remember that I tried to tell my sisters something about me waking up fast that morning. I tried to say the word “eyeballs” in the sentence but ended up saying “i bonked my balls open” my sisters and I almost died from laughing.
When my mom was in college, studying to be a journalist, one of her peers tried to say “fasten your seatbelt” and “buckle up” at the same time, and it came out as “fuckle up”.
I remember asking my friend if the pen she was using was a gel pen and she wanted to say no it's a ball pen but she ended up saying "no it's a bell pon"😂
I remember I was leaving a funeral and I remember one of my relatives, who was in tears by the way, said “I love you.” I tried to say, “I love you too.” It came out as “Yoo-Hoo!” I yelled ‘yoo-hoo’ at my crying grandmother, at my uncle’s funeral, and the only part of the after math I can remember was the entire church turning to look at me. I don’t think I’ll ever quite live that down, I swear to god, when I die and my life flashes before my eyes, if I grimace, you’ll know why.
dont worry- at my great aunts funeral there was a singing portion and it was so bad that I made a little snicker after trying to keep it in, and it echoed. It was so embarrassing
Whilst reading the Bill of Rights out loud in American History class, a friend of mine accidentally turned the 8th Amendment from a statement prohibiting excessive bail into a ban on "Excessive Balls."
My mom and I were in the drive through for Chick-Fil-A, and she rolled down the window and deadpan asked the order taker “do you sell.. chicken sandwiches here?” The worker was trying sooo hard to keep a straight face lol
A less extreme one, when I was 11, at volleyball they gave me a form for my parents to fill out. Me being polite I wanted to say “Thanks” and “Thank you” at the same time. I looked this woman dead in the eye, and proceeded to say “THANK” and walked off.
One time I opened the oven, and all the heat inside flew out into my face. I tried to say “I just got blasted in the face by warmness” and “I just got blasted in the face by heat” at the same time, and ended up yelling in front of my family “ah! I just got blasted in the face by wheat!”
I was at the store once and the cashier who also happens to be a friend of mine asked me how I was doing and I tried to say "I'm doing good today." and "I'm good, you?" at the same time and loudly said with upmost confidance "I'm doing YOU today." in front of several other custormers and her co-workers.
This isn't really the same thing, but once while I was very tired I went to say "excuse me" to someone I was trying to walk past and for some reason I said "pspspsps" as if I was trying to get the attention of a cat
ah this brings back the memory of when a coworker tried to say "can you hold" and "can i put you on hold" at the same time and ended up asking the customer CAN I HOLD YOU
imagine your just a student learning to read with your teacher and you get a word right, your teacher hesitates for a second and just yells with excitement "GOOD GOD!"
Once i tried to say "I'm sorry" and " You'll be okay" at the same time when my friend was sad. I blurted out " *ARE YOU SORRY?* " they backed away slowly and then ran home
Today I hit my pinky on something and I tried to say “ow my pinky” and “ow my finger” at the same time and I ended up saying “ow my finky”. It immediately sent me into a laughing fit
4:08, I did this once too. I splashed a citrus based drink into my eye and my coworker said "My bad, sorry" I tried to tell him "not your fault" and "no worries" just said "not bad" as I clutched my eye in pain
Yikes, I remember this happening after I told a friend of mine in college that I was graduating that semester. He said, "Everyone's graduating and leaving me!" in a joking tone. I tried to say, "You won't be alone," and laugh, but instead what came out was, "Haha, you're gonna be alone!" He wouldn't let me live it down.
Working as a (female) fitness trainer, my brain couldn't decide between saying "take a break" and "take a rest" so what came out of my mouth was "take a breast". Not sure if it was better or worse that the client I was training was my older brother... 💀
I haven’t genuinely laughed at a video in literal years. But this series is something else because my dyslexic brain dose this crappy to me all the time. Please continue the series and I love it so dearly
My aunt was at a formal event where the discussion had turned to someone passing away. The room went silent, and she went to break it with either "What a pity" or "What a shame..." Landed on "WHAT A SHITTY."
It's become slightly infamous at my work, where I was closing down the shop due to a storm, and the last customer was leaving and I tried to call out, "Stay safe!" But my squirrel brain yelled out, "Stay shlafe!!!!", and the man chuckled all the way out.... 🙌
I once tried to say " I hope you pass" and "I hope you have this" and ended up saying "I hope you ace pass." To my friend who had an exam first lesson.
My best was during a job interview as a teen so I was pretty nervous and I tried to say I enjoy being “physically around” customers and it came out as “physically intimate” with customers. In a coffee shop. Somehow I got that job
Matt creates a sequel to a classic. This is gonna absolutely amazing! I'm still in denial about Yahoo Answers shutting down. Tomorrow I'm gonna go on Quora and pretend it's Yahoo answers.
yeah, there's some weirdoes on there, but you have to go looking under rocks and crevices like you're looking for rare snails, where in yahoo answers, they'd just be scuttling out in the open
I’d say the people who were on Yahoo Answers have moved to Quora, since I’ve seen some idiocy there. This very channel has a seven minute video on Quora questions about Shrek, in fact.
if you want to go really oldschool (as in, Usenet-old school), ask the question "how wuz hat putato plaed? did bil kulin tos uh putato at thu kuntestintz? tat wuld b a funi" and see what kind of reaction you get
I once tried saying "sit down" and "share" at the same time to 2 CHILDREN AND MY DUMBASS SAID "SHIT AIR!!!" Lmao 💀 the children were too stunned to speak
i often try to say “it doesn’t matter” and “i don’t care” at the same time and didn’t realize why my friends looked upset at me when i told them “i don’t matter” instead
My mom is very dyslexic and has said numerous funny things. Once when trying to tell me to grab corn pops at the grocery store she told me to get some "Porn cops" which was very embarrassing to hear next to the old folks next to us at walmart.
@@starlittardis2049 my friend was trying to show me a drawing she made, she tried to say “horse” and “pony” at the same time Guess what came out of her mouth
I once was going upstairs and tried saying “my shoes are untied” and I just went too fast and just said “my twos are unshied” Been saying it since, honestly just feels better to say
Mom: "What do you want cat?" (The cat was meowing) Me: "I think she's afraid I might eat her." Mom: "What?" Me: "What?" I meant to say, "I think she wants me to feed her", but I think whatever I was watching on TV at the time jumbled up my brain, and I ended up saying something *way more* disturbing than I ever meant it to be. ^^;
I once had my brain shut down while trying to ask my grandpa to pick up some kettlecorn popcorn from the store. I ended up asking "Can you get some kettlepop cop porn?" And now I hate everything 💀
I was at a d&d session and we got like nothing done so there was a joke where whenever someone did something, they got to be in the doing things club. I did something and tried to say, "Can I join the people in the doing things club?" and ended up really excitedly yelling, "Can I be in the doing people club?"
@@Kinokoumori Our bard is in fact also in the doing people club as earlier that same session he was lying on an npc's bed, shirtless, in the french girls pose for over an hour waiting for the npc come in and then fucked the npc while the rest of us were fighting for our lives
@@lucyicanel Yep, sounds like our short King, Kairo. Damn Gnome bastard has at least half a dozen illegitimate hybrid children by now wondering where their father is...
@@lucyicanel reminds me of the time I told my entire characters backstory to one of the other characters while lounging in a couch, while up a flight of stairs two other party members were fighting an infinite stream of (I forgor the word, somewhere between ghoul and goblins) there to prevent them from going in a door that had no significance
one time my sister wouldn't stop talking at dinner and it started getting on my nerves, so i tried to say "shut your mouth" and "eat your food" at the same time and what came out was "eat your mouth"
