I was wishing my dad a good flight while he was off to flying practice. I tried to yell "Have a good flight" and "Good luck" and accidentally yelled "HAVE A GOOD FUCK!"
"Squeesh" sounds like a sort of affectionate word for tightly hugging your precious cat/fur baby after you haven't seen them in a while and you've missed them terribly.
I was struggling to understand my friend's school calendar, and I ended up saying "MY MAIN IS HAVING A BRELTDOWN!" and she looked at me with lots of concern and she said "are you going to have a seizure or a stroke soon?"
a customer asked for a spoon and i tried to say “no problem!” and “yeah that’s okay!” and i looked him in the eyes and said “uh, that’s a problem.” i walked away like it never happened.
I was witnessing two squirrels fighting with a classroom on the last day of seventh grade and one of the squirrels was thrown by the other so I tried to say “Watch out it’s a flying squirrel!” And “It’s literally a flying squirrel!” But I loudly exclaimed “IT’S A FLYING CLITORIS!!” in front of a now terrified class of children
I once tried saying “everybody be quiet” and “everyone stop screaming” and ended up saying… “everybody stop creaming”. In front of a bunch of little kids.
Back in the day when I was teaching English (!) at a college in Russia, I wanted to jokingly say to my students, "I'm sick and tired of you guys," which came out as, "I'm thick and tired of you guys."
Once tried saying “I don’t care” and “I hate you” at the same time during a heated argument and it came out at “I don’t hair you” and that caused us both to laugh and calm down.
I once tried to say "Happy birthday, dude!" to one of my best friends. What spilled out of my mouth was "HAPPY DEATH DAY". He's never talked to me again since.
my mom went to go look at something at the store after we checked out and i had the bag and tried to say “im gonna stay here” and “they’ll think we’re stealing” at the same time and announced in front of the whole store “im gonna steal”
Lol reminds me of that time I was at work and I had been prepping for semester finals and I went “My brain melted. Someone committed aggravated brain melting. I need the brain melting police.” Lollllllll
@@chelseasheehan9227That legitimately sounds like something I'd say. I say "my brain is sideways" when confused about something. (Or when very confused, "my brain is upside down") Although I am an autistic mess, so there's that as well.
@@nikkiofthevalleyFun fact: "sideways" and "to burn" is the same in Turkish. Additionally, "beynim yandı" (literally "my brain has burned") is a colloquial phrase you could hear being used when one's really confused and stumped about something.
Once I tried to say “sorry” and “‘scuse me” at the same time and ended up just saying “scary, scary” at the person walking past me like I was afraid of them.
A while ago while working, a customer said thank you so I tried to say "no worries!" and "all good!" at the same time and just ended up yeliing "ALL WORRIES :)"
I remember one night I was so tired that my brain was scrambled and I tried to say "Sorry, I'm not thinking straight" while also asking my sister to go get a pack of Oreos for me. What ended up coming out was "Sorry, would you- can- mind- think.. Oreos?"
I worked at McDonald's years back and I tried to ask a lady "will that complete your order" and "is that all for you" and ended up saying "will that complete you" and she said "I am incomplete without my number 8" and honestly me too
I once was buying some chips at the local corner store. After paying for them, the cashier said: “Would you like you receipt?”. I tried to say “I’m okay” and “I’m good at the same time and ended up proclaiming “IM GAY” It still haunts me to think about how everyone just stared at me afterwards.
Nice work right there, @@KadeoAVvalentine :D See that OP? You're bringing happiness & social interaction into the word. The jerks have already forgotten & moved on to being busybodies in someone else's life.
Once, I was at a Baskin Robbins with my brother. As we were sitting outside eating our ice cream, a man walking in commented on the triple scoop cone my brother was eating. I tried to say several different variations of the sentence “Well it’s a good thing he’s got a bottomless pit for a stomach!” But ended up just saying “bottom bottom bottom bottom” for about 30 seconds, before leaving in embarrassment
one time i tried to ask my mom if i could have some strawberries. i couldn't decide whether to say "can i have some strawberries" or "would it be okay if i had some strawberries" i ended up saying "are you okay? can i have strawberries?"
My mother told me about a time she went into a store to buy a Diet Coke, and she looked the cashier in the eyes and said, "can I have a Diet Cock?" And then she tried to correct herself and said, "I meant, can I have a Diet Cock?" And she was so mortified, she remembers it over twenty years later.
One time I was getting a ride home from my friend, at the time it was near Halloween and since we both celebrated we were talking about plans. I was trying to say that on the upcoming weekend I was "going to decorate for Halloween" but unfortunately my brain lost function at that very moment and I said "Imma Hallowate for Decoreen!" I was so dang lucky that we'd just arrived to my house at that very moment. And without hesitation I got out of the car without another word. We never spoke of this day again.
4:15 i once tried to say “no problem” and “your welcome” after teaching my friend how to shuffle cards, it came out as me confidently saying “your problem” like it was some sort of curse 💀💀💀💀
I tried to tell my dad his shorts had gotten in the water, while thinking about the phrase “up the wazzoo” and ended up shouting in front of about 20 children with their parents at a water park “ DAD, WATER IS COMING OUT OF YOUR WAZZOO!!!!” It’s still a running joke in the family to this day
At work a few weeks ago, my supervisor told me to wait a minute while he asked another employee a question. I was trying to say “No worries” and “I’ve got time” at the same time and I ended up saying, “NO TIME!” Nailed it. 😂
i went through a very unfortunate (though mercifully brief) phase where i would try to say both "no problem" and "yep", and ended up consistently replying to "thank you" with a cheerful "nope!"
For some reason this comment in particular reminded me of the chunk of my teenage years where I tried to say "bless you" and "gesundheit" at the same time when someone sneezed and would unfailingly say "blessundheit" every. Fucking. Time. I hated it so much
Solution: Tell the other person that it's how people say "no problem" nowadays and that they're outdated (That way you don't have to deal with the shame as much)
Reminds me of the time in middle school where I wanted to stop saying “fuck” so much and tried to replace it with “frick” - and would consistently loudly curse “FRUCK” every goddamn time. I kid you not, this continued for about a year. It was incredibly embarrassing at the time and I eventually just gave up seeing as it was physically impossible for me to stop.
One evening when walking with my 5 year old niece in our front yard, it was hazy out and a full moon. It looked like a solid white disc so I was going to point and say "special moon." I started to speak but felt a burp coming on fast, so it came out as "SPOON! BUURRRRP" She's now 17 and still doesn't let me live it down at Thanksgiving.
@@HelenaVanCity Nawww...that's fantastic that she can rib him about it...right up until his last breath, so to speak. HAHAHAHA! ...I'm...I'm going to hell...
One time in class, we doing playing a kahoot and the question was “what’s the first step in the scientific method?” and I said WAY too loudly “GIVE UP!” THE CLASS WAS SILENT, EVERYONE HEARD ME
I once was talking to a friend after she ran into her teacher in public, and started to say "I hate seeing people I know in public" and accidently started to say "I hate peeing seeple I know in public" and because THAT would be embarrassing I stopped to correct myself. Unfortunately, I started giggling hysterically before I could finish and all my poor friend heard was "I hate peeing" followed by uncontrollable laughter
one time the science teacher asked the class a question like: "what are the organelles of a plant cell?" and i tried to say "Cell wall" and "Chloroplast" at the same time and just yelled out... "CELL PLAST!!" thank god no one heard me correctly
Last year, I lost my 2 cats. My friend tried to say “They’re in a better place now” and “I’m sorry” AND WHAT CAME OUT WAS SOMEHOW “CONGRATULATIONS” 💀💀💀💀
Once someone asked me "What is one of your pet peeves" and I tried to say "When someone tells you to do something but you were about to do it" but then I like fused the whole sentence somehow and said "When you're about to someone"
I was sleep deprived and wanted to cheer a friend before an exam, my brain couldn't decide if it wanted to say "Good luck" or "You got this", and I ended saying "Good this" ...It's now an inside joke in our group.
As someone with Dyslexia, this happens to me on a weekly basis. Recently I tried saying to my mom "Love you" and "Thank you" at the same time when she got me my breakfast. Ended up telling her "Lanck You"
will never forget when my brother pissed me off over something trivial and i tried to say "count your days" and "your days are numbered" at the same time. ended up telling him to "count your numbers." he still makes fun of me for it 😭
this is like in band class when our director tried to tell us to “number your measures” and told us to “measure your numbers,” and now that we’ve all made fun of her for so long about it she keeps doing it on accident cause it in her brain
This morning, my brother was trying to say Sociopathic & Telekinesis & it came out as "SOCIAL PANINI", also one time I was trying to say Screeching & Squeaking & I said(drumroll please)... SQUEECHING
My mom once, while we were making cookies, told my dad that he needs to “cream together the bugger” instead of “we need to mix together the cream and butter”.
This made me laugh so hard that I was laughing at how hard I was laughing. Then I started laughing again while trying to drink some water and nearly choked on it.
@@daemondoodlesyeah i love matt, but if I had someone have that conversation with me when I was a cashier about a product I didn't really understand the hype around I'd just feel like they were taking the pisd and feel uncomfortable://
I once answered the phone but before "Hello" had left my mouth, the person on the other end of the line was talking with someone else while they waited for me to answer, but I thought they were talking to me so I wanted to also say "pardon". So to them, I answered the phone by saying "hardon" 😂
I dropped my water bottle on the ground on accident once. Tried to say “Sorry” and “Oops” at the same time, ended up with “Soups!” I couldn’t stop laughing for ten minutes straight
Once when I was little I was making a bulletin board with my parents for church and I accidentally said "shinier" and "prettier" at the same time, what came out was "We gotta make it more shittier!!" It's been 15 years and they haven't let me live it down.
One of my favorite parts of these videos is that not only do they mix up words, some of them unintentionally yell it out, as if the word/sentence amalgam didn’t make things awkward enough already
Once I was telling some friends how nice a forest was today and the conversation went something like this: "Yeah, it's really nice. The sun shining through the trees, not too windy, you got the uh... the... Burping Chirds." "...Are you ok?" "I MEANT CHIRPING BIRDS"
I tried to say "telepathy" and "psychic" at the same time while watching Mewtwo Strikes Back. ended up saying "PSYCHOPATHY" pretty good description of mewtwo if you ask Also that one time playing the Pokemon TCG and saying 'game on' 'radiant Jirachi' and 'slay kween' at the same time. It came out as: "SLAY RADON JIRACHI" my nuclear physics brain took over
When I played city-country-river with a few friends, we added the category "Job". However, when the letter was "L", one of my friends wanted to say "I've got Lego-Producer" and "I want to become Lego-Producer" and she cried, with pleasure, "I am Lego". We had to stop for five minutes because we all were dying of laughter. Edit: Today, the same girl tried to say "Touch the tablet, Sif" and "Sif, help me I'm trying" while we were playing a game (btw Sif is a common nordic name for girls). She then said "Sif, touch me". What's wrong with you, Christin?
One time a coworker and I were talking about Pokemon champion fights, and I tried to say Cynthia "wiped the floor with me" and "kicked my ass" at the same time. Ended up confidently declaring "Oh yeah, Cynthia wiped my ass." That coworker has never looked at me the same way again. I am haunted.
One time I was at a go kart race, and after a race, another driver confronted me about a collision we had in the race, and I tried to say “I was on your inside” and “I was trying to pass you” at the same time, and I ended up saying “I was inside you.” The look on his face was of pure “wtf” energy.
Once in art school one of my classmates who I had barely ever talked to was drawing a complicated scene on an extremely long, rolled out piece of paper. I wanted to comment on it saying "Your paper is so long," while thinking "Your design is too hard," and it came out as, "Your penigh is so long and hard." He stopped drawing and stared at me for five seconds before we both started laughing.
@@lolfool866 Sure, I forgot you were living in my head at the time and know what two sentences I was thinking about and how they were supposed to come together. 🙄😒 Get over yourself. This happened over twenty years ago. I may not remember the exact sentences that created the funny line, but the line itself produced such a comedic moment that I won't forget it.
Reminds me of that one time I tried to say "sick and "epic" at the same time and ended up just very casually blurting "sex" while my friend was showing me vacation photos-
One time, I was trying to compliment my little brother by saying "your hair looks nice today" or "you look smart today" but ended up saying "your hair looks smart today"
One time a long time ago when i was going off the school bus and i meant to say "hi" and "im tired can i go and watch tv when we go home" at the same time and said "hi tired tv home" to my grandma (R.I.P)🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
One time my dad was mad at me and he was trying to tell me to "STOP TALKING" but all that came out was him yelling "SPOCK" at me with great intensity and passion.
Once upon a time, someone my mum was working with was trying to tell a bunch of kids to “shush” and “sit down” at the same time. What came out of her mouth was this: “Sh*t down!”. Fortunately, they were teaching a bunch of 3-4 year olds, so I don’t think they’d pick up words like that easily.
When we first got our dog Chevy, my brother was around ten years old. He was trying to tell Chevy to sit, mixed the two together, and ended up accidentally shouted SHIT
Yesterday I was working on the character design for a little 2D indie game, and was pondering while pacing whether I wanted the characters' heads to be able to turn on their own or if they should always be looking straight forward with their bodies which would be much easier. Just then, I walked into the kitchen where my older sibling and Mom were and decided to wave. But for some reason I subconsciously copied the concept of staring straight forward no matter what, and ended up waving at a dim empty hallway. I didn't even notice that it might have looked weird until my mom asked who I was waving at.
I once ended up in a conversation with some old friends I didn't know very well (hadn't seen them since I was about 5) about the fact that I'm vegetarian. Their mum asked me if I would ever go vegan, and I tried to say "no, I like cheese too much" but all that came out was "like too cheese" followed by me slamming my head on the table involuntarily and uncontrollably laughing-crying out of embarrassment for a solid few minutes. I did not have a good time that day.
