Patient Duty | House M.D. 

That little smirk when he saw the lady use her inhaler incorrectly. He knew he was going to have fun with this one

House's reaction to the self-circumcision is one of his few genuine shock reactions in the show

“You don’t like to swallow. Not surprised” I haven’t watched in a while but that one caught me off guard. These writers were in beast mode with this show

Patient to House: "Jerk" Cuddy: "What was that all about?" House: "Jamaican chicken recipes" HAHAHAHAHA!!!

"Do I look like an idiot?" Is the riskiest question to ask this man.

Patient: "Do I look like an idiot?" House: visible restraint

As a cat owner and lover, I died laughing at the bag and river joke.

I’ve always loved when patients think they can withhold information and House deciphers them like a 1st grade puzzle.

I love how they don't even show House insulting the lady with the inhaler. Just the aftermath. You just know it's a roast marathon waiting to happen.

The lady using the inhaler like a perfume gets me every time XD

7:19 that smile 😆 I think he genuinely loved that someone was that stupid, just so he could go ALL out

I love how House gives the last guy the medicine knowing full well he's covered if the guy is stupid enough to take them since the patient didn't mention he had diabetes once, so it's not logged in the files.

I love House's reaction when the guy drops his pants. I believe that's like the only time he actually reacted in a frightened way about anything he saw.

House has seen a man's eyeball spontaneously explode. He was absolutely horrified at the guy's self-circumcision.

Oh I love that ending. ‘If you lied to me and take the medication you’ll die.’ 😂House gets people to think pretty hard about simple issues, just be honest for a better life!

I need more reactions from Hugh Laurie like when he turned around to see the horror the patient caused himself 🤣

"I'm gonna... get a plastic surgeon. Get the twinkie back in the wrapper." laughing hysterically at this

"you don't like to swallow, not surprised." house got no chills 😹😹

6:14 I love how the father was quick to tell his kid something like "let's take the money and get some Dayquil."

For the self circumcision, If House has that kind of reaction, then you know its bad.

When that asthma lady demonstrated the inhaler I could hear House saying "Not an idiot at all" 😂😂

"I got some boxcutters, and, um ..." Words you never want to hear.

"You don't swallow? I could have guessed." the best line house has ever delivered

The clinic duty segments are always my favorite, was a shame they became less common as the show went on

Bleeding crotch “Well it’s not lupus”

Love how he's the Sherlock Holmes of medicine. Deduces people from subtle clues on observation.

One of my favorite House gags is how they play the Metroid teleport footage as if it was a game over.

That smile that grew on Hous's face when he saw how the woman used the inhaler lol

The inhaler lady has me losing my shit. My cousin has this nanny we are all super close to and she has asthma as well. It developed recently. And we got her the inhaler and sent her off for her holidays. When she came back, she said the inhaler didn't work for her and she threw it away. We did exactly what House and asked her to show us how she used it and you know what she did? Press the damn pump without taking off the damn cap. 🤧

“This is Vicodin, it’s mine, no you can’t have any it’s mine”

The lady with the inhaler and "my pants tell you that I have diabetes?" Both got me 🤣

"If you live by the river....." priceless

My favorite thing about the Mandarin patient is the moment he asks “she said super depressed?” That shows that 1. He knows that’s not what the mom was saying at all, and 2. He’s still playing along cause he wants to see how stupid she can be.

You know when you're honest to House he's actually really nice to you.

0:54 I would've raised my hand, I'd love a doctor like House.

"not the sharpest chopstick in the drawer" "nali, nali" ("where, where" - a common response to compliments)

"You don't like to swallow, not surprised."

“Name an animal that begins with B” “Baby elephant” “Don’t worry, B is a BEAR of a letter”

3:39 best moment EVER, the most genuine shock on House’s face you’ll ever see

The inhaler has me wheezing I can’t stop laughing 😂🤣🤣🤣🤣

"Ugh! Steroids? Isn't there something else you can give me?" "Well, if you live by the river, I've got a bag..."

"You don't like to swallow...not surprised" "Get the Twinkee back in the wrapper" "Not the sharpest chopstick in the drawer"

"Why don't you show me how your inhaler works." Some people really are that dumb, and it never fails to amaze me

2:21 - when House pulled that THIRD glove I just about died 🤣

Woman: “Jerk” Cuddy: “What was that all about?” House: “ Jamaican chicken recipe” 😂😂😂

Old lady: (In Chinese) "The cough medicine i took did not help " Teen girl: "She wants birth control pills"

7:18 Just love the expression he makes at the woman as if to say: “Oh, this is TOO good!”

The on screen chemistry between Lisa Edelstein and Hugh Laurie was such a highlight for me in this series.

*"Not the sharpest chopstick in the drawer, is she?"*

House grabbing the third glove will always be hilarious

The fact the house is playing metroid zero mission makes this show everything

I love the "What are you doing?" "Level 4" House is playing Metroid: Zero Mission in which there is no level system and instead just one big area to navigate. On top of that, he hasn't even gotten the long beam, one of the very first required items in the game

"Baby elephant is actually a good answer. B is a "bear" of a letter." God, I miss this show.

Grandpa: 'bout to die from tuberculosis House: 50$ to anyone who leaves right now Grandpa: It's free real estate

They need to make a pre-House M.D. series where a younger House is in Med school and doing practicum. That would be an awesome series!

7:34 that's not level 4 it's Metroid zero mission for the Gameboy advance

I have Asthma. Seeing that lady spray her inhaler on her neck made me laugh. xD

Guy: *pulls pants down* House: *terrified*

"Do I look like an idiot" *proceeds to misuse the inhaler* her response was less then if I were house

i don't now why but when he says to up his insulin levels to chocolate chip ice cream levels it makes me laugh 8:50

"Sore throat?" *paitent pulls magazine away to show blood at his croth area* "Well its not lupus"

3:39 That's probably the only time House ever reacted with genuine shock and horror. I can only imagine what that guy did to his junk.

The self-circumcision scene still makes me lol every time I see House's reaction.

Understanding House's voice when he has hay fever would be an act of magic.

“50$ anyone?” Me sick but poor takes it comes back next day

The inhaler lady... 😂 How can you manage to use an inhaler wrong?

Dude is blunt as they get and a jerk and I love it

9:24 funnily enough that’s the name of my psychiatrist

Patient: “Do i look like an idiot?” House’s mind: “I was doing SO WELL”

“Sore throat?” ... “Well it’s not Lupus.” GOD DAMMIT IT ISN’T LUPUS EVERYONE OFF THE LUPUS TRAIN.

The saved image of his scared face makes me laugh every time I see it

Most of the clips I'd seen before, but the suddenness of the $50 clip made me laugh out loud. So much don't-give-a-crap energy.

house: why dont you show me how your inhaler works lady: uses it as a perfume bottle house: *visible frustration*

"This is vicodin. It's mine. You can't have any." I miss this show XD XD XD XD

One of my favourite videos of all time!

"If you live by thr river, i have a bag" Such a underrated line imo

"baby elephant is actually a good awnser B is a *bear* of a letter" i cant breath

As a guy who has asthma, I laughed my ass off at the inhaler scene XD

She really knows how to use that inhaler

This cured my depression. 😂 I absolutely love this man.

2:50 house: “say as many animals as you can that begin with the letter B, go” Me: *2 seconds later* *”Banana”*

House's reaction to the guy who to tried to circumcise himself is the best of all of these, purely because a shocked/horrified House is a rare sight indeed.

The asthmatic lady😂😂😂 bless her. Reminds me of a clip of a guy collecting 'air samples' with a garbage bag.

The way he looks up and says “You’re lying” 😂😂😂😂😂😂

" _What are you doing?_ " " _Level 4_ " - Uuuh... No House, that's Metroid Zero Mission. It's one continuous world, no stages.

The amount of gloves he uses on that woman at 2:15 loool

Finally an episode where the patient .. or patients, don’t have severe symptoms that cause mass confusion.

*"You don't like to swallow? Not surprised..."* House burn

he's like what would've happened if sherlock went to medical school.....😀

My mom worked in a doctor's office, and I'll tell you... the lady with the asthma? That has actually happened before. 😳

7:00 _do I look like an idiot_ Nope ... *Show me how the inhaler works* _spray spray_ **Visible confusion**

An actual conversation at the clinic I used to work at: Me: Sir, do you have any medical conditions, like diabetes or hypertension, for which you are on medications? Patient: No, absolutely not. I'm fit and fine. I eat only two small meals a day and walk 5 miles each day. Me: * looking at his chart which shows 15 years of poorly controlled diabetes and an old prescription for oral medicines from 5-7 years ago * Are you sure you don't have any medical condition? Take a minute and think about it, if you'd like. Patient: Yes, I don't have a condition. You doctors think you're so smart and you're condescending to the very people you're supposed to help! Me: Alright then. I'm going to start you on insulin- Patient: Oh, no need for that. I already take insulin; twice a day. Me: 😐 What do you take the insulin for? Patient: Weren't you listening? I have diabetes. Me: 😠

accurate reaction for any man who sees or hears that

The self circumsission just hurts in so many ways

I was so confused when she said she goes through 1 inhaler a week until I saw her use it which had me dying😂

“Jerk” “What was that all about?” “Jamaican Chicken Recipes” Lol ok

I've seen that intro clip dozens of times, but just now realized that when he says "I am a BORED certified diagnostician" he actually said 'board-certified'

His “It’s not acceptable to be stupid” kind of attitude towards stupid people and then fluently giving them their Just Desserts is very fun to watch.

“Well it’s not Lupus” *says House with disappointment

This proves House actually treats you rather well when you don't lie to him.