As a non-Muslim this was so interesting to watch!! Thank you guys for always being honest about the expectations in your religion and cultures. The respect/fathers expectation and protectiveness is the pretty much the same all over the world and across different religions, but I really admire how you're willing to wait for years for your parents' acceptance of the marriage and the lengths that the future husband will go to in order to marry the woman he obviously loves and adores. From my faith to yours, God bless ❤️
I think this generation, of 20 year olds will be the ones to break this ridiculous ban on interracial marriages!! insha'Allah, I most certainly will allow my children to marry outside of the culture
+Leila Kabbani That's awesome. You don't come across many Syrians who want that. And honestly, I'm 20 now but since a very small age I always wanted to marry a Syrian girl for some odd reason. I don't know why, just been there since an early age haha and I make dua for it nearly every day :p
@Khan Hossain Syrian people have europeic DNA from colonisation they are super beautiful, many of them are hard working and well raised aswell, most syrians I know are doctors or dentists. Who wouldn't want that? Superior genetics and intelligent people
You guys were on the side of our video as a suggested video! We are in an interracial relationship as well and it's refreshing to see you both creating a video about the topic and answering questions :) Being black and asian you can imagine how contrasty we are!
I feel like it's much easier for a Pakistani man to convince his parents to marry a girl from a different race than for a Pakistani woman to marry a guy from a different race.
I think it's so important for parents to realize once their kid is born in a country, no matter what the parents roots are, the kids associate more with the country they're born in. A kid can be American, UK, Canadian born or wherever but ethnically be Somali, Indian, Russian, Tunisian.. blah blah.. but they'll feel more attached to their country of birth. especially if deen comes first, then it makes it a lot easier to relate to someone of a different background.
+sweetsalara It depends, it can also be that you can be born & raised abroad (& then come to the West) but have similar cultures and then be likely accept interracial marriage more easily than others.
You're such a cute couple! Man, I follow so many muslims and muslim couples here on youtube :) It's ridiculous to hear people bashing muslims like they know each and everyone of you... If they did know just some of you, their perspective would change. I'm not a muslim and I might disagree with some of muslim practices, but hey, it's a free world, and in the end we're all human beings and we should respect each other! Peace&love to you & your families ;)
I think this is with the majority of Pakistani families, and I only say this because I am one. Pakistani families tend to clash, not mix, clash traditions&culture with Islam, or their religion. It's not right. My family does that all the time and it really annoys me when I provide them with Quranic text /Hadith that support what I say and they disregard it because it's not their 'culturee'. 😑😞 Its gets really frustrating at times so I just do what I believe is right, according to what Allah (swt) has said. #fedup #asians.
+Hassan Nadeem an example would be that the daughter in law has to live with her husband's family, and serve them. in Islam the daughter in law is not obligated to serve anybody apart from her own parents and her husband. it is her husband's responsibility to look afeter his own parents not the daughter in laws. also some pakistani mother in laws put a restriction on how often the daughter in law can visit her own parents, when in Islam it is our duty to take care of our parents and Allah will question us about this. Another example would be some pakistani families don't like their daughter in law working, when islamically she has the right to work. there are loads more examples such as big weddings in some cultures are not allowed in Islam (wasting money etc)
+Hassan Nadeem also the most dangerous relationship of a wife is with her brother in law. I have seen some many situations where the woman is living with her brother in law, and they are alone in house, or if she needs a lift somewhere then it is deemed acceptable for the brother in law to take her. Prophet Muhammad (SAW) warned us of this relationship because people don't realise that the brother in law is non mahram and he can't be in the same room with his brothers wife without her mahram present. From my experience Pakistanis don't even acknowledge this and some cases i have seen the husband moving in with his brother even though he can afford to live separately, just to please his family and avoid conflicts. islamically if you can afford to live separately then you should, otherwise you need to provide your wife with her own room, kitchen and bathroom.
The thing is if his father does a surprise visit, the father will allow him to enter the house and will be hospitable but he will think that he is extremely rude. I am Egyptian as well, and I can guarantee that any surprise guests are welcomed but they definitely leave a negative impression. Some people might even mention the fact that Islamically you must ask if the person is free or not because they might be in the middle of something. You must ask for permission. I think surprise outings are better. Like "oh, I didn't know you guys go to this restaurant too!" Then you can share the same table or whatever. Dina and Sid are obviously experts on interracial marriage, and marriage in general, but the reason why I am adding this comment is because I am an Egyptian living in Egypt so I thought adding my two cents might help... Anyway, awesome content as usual! Love you guys!! God bless both of you, and Hana inshallah :)
The Lightness it depends on your family's culture. For some families this happens all the time and it's acceptable. Others, like yours, do not tolerate this act. But, to be fair, the father of the spouse did ask for a meeting so him coming to the house is not too much of a surprise
Found myself nodding along to this 😅 It took me (a Pakistani) and my partner (Afghan) 7 years to convince my dad but there was no movement until the 3 men were in the same room together. It's our Nikah this Sunday Inshallah ✨
well if it takes her 4 years to convince her dad and she is 20 now, its not so bad lol. Marrying at 24 is a good age to be married I think. In the time being families can get to know each other, meet up and understand each others culture, like sid and dina said. The unknown is always scary but once you start to become familiar with different traditions, you are more likely to accept the other person. It will also help reduce any anxiety your father or mother may have about their child moving into a family from a different racial group or culture. It will help them to see, if they can adjust so can their child.
I watched the whole video and it made me feel like the advice was for me😂😂 , im a completely different culture, I'm single, and I don't have a dad... but the concentration I showed for their advice was out of this world. I even started writing notes.
😂😂😂 at the prayer part at the end. #Replaying 🙌 You guys are great! I can only imagine Sid and Dina plotting and shuffling around (#Persistence) to ensure this lovely unity occurred. ❤️
As I always say, Deen over culture ANY DAY!! Its fine to have culture but once it clashes with Deen, then why are you still doing it?? We are all equal at the end of the day, so people who strongly hold onto their culture and think its the best shit in town, really need a reality check, cos you're culture isn't what's gonna get you into Jannah mate. Alhamdullilah I come from a family where marrying outside your ethnicity isn't shocking :)
It's sad that parents these days still are so keen on marrying within the same culture and country. Alhamdulillah for my family, I'm Palestinian Lebanese Sunni and my husband is Iraqi Shia. But he's MUSLIM! I'm MUSLIM. That should be enough! We pray, we fast, and we celebrate Eid on THE SAME DAY. Inshallah parents for those wanting to marry out of their culture or a different sect in Islam will become easier.
Man you guys make the best couple!!!!! Mashallah Hana or (Hannah) is so lucky to have parents like you both. You should totally do some meet ups... I'd be there!
my Iranian Muslim dad married my Italian/Spanish mom whos Roman Catholic and my mom didnt convert to Islam. my dad's family at first tried to sabotage the marriage and were horrible to my mom but it was more because they wanted him to marry an Iranian girl, not so much about Islam. most of my family in Iran arent that religious but have to pretend they are bc of the laws. but many Iranians sadly have superiority complexes and look down upon other cultures
Love your advices guys. With a good attitude like that where you try and keep your parents on your side too, gives you their blessing and inshaallah you can be happier in your marriage!
Please do a video on the first year of marriage and how to know when you're ready for marriage and maybe if you know anything about it, arranged marriages?
You've scared me off marriage completely by going on about how scary the first year of marriage can be. Maybe make a video on that and get it done and dusted so it's out of the way? 😂😂
the "father talk to father" thing is very helpful. it is basically how I got married to my husband. My father was against our marriage because my husband was "very young" and still in collage. we waited a couple of years and then he got his father talk to my father and uncle. and that is how it happened. :) hope you guys all the best!
Literally in middle of trying all these tips and tricks.. Since past 2 and a half years! NOTHING is working with my dad, and we're both Pakistani.. 😧.. It's just pure ego and it's definitely not the right way to go about from my dad's side.. It's literally all my family and his family Vs Dad.. Duas people =(
I didn't understand one part. Dina your dad married an English woman. If he's against to interracial marriage than why he married your mom ? I would never thought your dad will think like this. He knows it can be work. That's my question mark 😁
+Rema Sa it's because Sid is Pakistani. Most south Asian Muslims are so stuck with their own culture that they are very difficult with marriage with another culture, even if they r Muslim. I mean I know people have been disowned by their parents because of it as well as them being accepted.
i love how at the end of the video you guys gave useful information and tips to everyone and not just specifically to the lady who sent the email, bc that was so useful!
Those who don't know Pakistan is not a country of one people, one race or one culture. Its a multi ethnic, multi-language country having their own distinctive culture. Guy from Peshawar most probably have Pashtun/Pathan/Afghan ethnicity.
My mother is Indonesian and my father is Indian, and while they're both Muslims, they both come from totally different cultural backgrounds. Even after 25 years of marriage, sometimes I can still see them trying to work around the cultural and traditional differences that are already implanted deep within them. So I see why most people choose to marry others of a similar culture. Because it takes a lot of determination and faith to work around these differences. I grew up in Singapore so I'm not very familiar with - neither do I practice fully - both their cultures. I just think that ultimately, while culture and tradition play a role in the type of person you end up being, we are Muslims first before anything else. Just as long as you put Islam (or whatever your faith is) before culture or tradition, I think you'll be okay marrying someone of a different race.
I thought Sid was going to say something wise at 18:19 and I leaned forward for this really awesome advice i'll save too for when I have a daughter inshallah then he said 'basically.. just kiss ass' and I leaned back and loled
Best advice you guys have ever given. Getting a dad to agree on marriage for his daughter, eldest daughter at that, is like trying to build a snowman in the dead of summer. I think this will be great for the two who intend to get married!
I think the fact that Sid has Hana and is now a dad himself makes him so much more apt at giving out advice on this topic. You guys are such and adorable couple Maashallah 👊
hahahaha! Ma sha Allah! You guys are awesome. Guys, please make dua that we all can get married and have joy! May Allah grant y'all Jannah and righteous children! ameen!
Father himself marries a different culture , but he is preventing daughter , what kind of person he is ? This is just disgusting. Moreover , In Islam there is NO caste or race , its Ummah. Its sad to see Muslims still hold on to the mind set of jahilliya.
Arabs look down on South asians, thats why it was Difficult for her to marry him, whilst him marrying a white woman wasn't an issue, neither was her twin marrying a white man
Hi guys, I also need a little bit of advice on this topic. I'm Turkish and my future husband is Pakistani. We both live in Germany, but his family is in Pakistan. We can't do the "bring them all together"-part, obviously....it is going to be really hard to communicate because his family only speaks Urdu... We communicate in English, because his German is not that fluent. Any idea how we could tackle this?
I'm Egyptian and Russian and married an American Scottish and Irish man. Interracial relationship has its challenges but it's totally worth it. Love learning about each other and blending the cultures
Egypt and Pakistan actually have A LOT in common. Even my egyptian husband says he always feels a closeness to pakistanis. I'm from n American/Anglo/Desi backround, my husband is egyptian. both cultures are strong and not going away lol, so yah our family is weird.
I am in USA, and I never had this problem. When I got married, I just took my birth certificate to the county recorders office and got married. My father found out I had been married four months later. There was no "sales" presentation.
Laurel Anderson In Islam father's permission is required for marriage except if he is mentally disturbed. Since you are non muslim, so you did fine on your side.
if your dads issues are purely issues with culture, you need to sit down with him and find out what his concerns are. As a non-pakistani your dads views on pakistanis and pakistani culture probably stem from what he has heard or what he thinks pakistani culture is about. He may not actually have any direct contact with any pakistanis or understand their culture at all. which is why he should be allowed to voice his concerns and you or your husband to be, or your husband to be's father can talk to him and put these concerns/thoughts/worries at ease.
I hop on the train (St Pancras) and see you guys! I was really tempted to say hello but I didn't want to feel like I was invading your privacy and it was super quite on the train. You guys are such a lovely family masha'Allah I felt like I was watching a live vlog. And I didn't want to disturb you guys checking up on Hannah. Masha'Allah. Basically I love your vids. That's all I was planning to say LOL
I'm not muslim, Im European and married another European. My dad didnt allow this since he has another nationality but like Sid said, you have to work with your mom. My mom really helped me to convince my dad and now we are happily together.
I'm muslim and I dont care what my dad or mum say about who I marry! its me who is getting married not them! I'm the one who is going to live with a guy my entire life! none of their business
لا حرام ... رضاء الوالدين مهم في الإسلام... يعني تخيلي تتزوجني واحد اهلك مب راضين يزوجوكي هو..يعني قاعده تكسرين بخاطر اهلك وهذا مب رضا الوالدين.. وحرام
+Killer 13 nah fam, you're bs. - "There is no marriage without a Wali" Al Tirmidhi 4/226 .. (A wali meaning your first blood relation, ie brothers, uncles etc) Perhaps you need to brush up on your deen before you come around spreading false information. If you want to go around marrying people without the approval from your wali, go ahead and do so, and have an unblessed marriage, however don't come around encouraging others to do the same cause in the day of Judgement, you'll be held accountable for spreading false, and rubbish information .
My problem is my partner is Hazara, his whole family is in Afghanistan and Iran but he has regular contact. I'm a revert. He says his family will accept me if we get married because they want him to choose his own wife, be in a loving marriage. But you know he thinks that but I have a child from a previous relationship (also a Hazara guy), my family isn't Muslim, I don't speak their language... There's just so many things that I don't believe they'll be able to accept and so what are we going to do I mean we can just lie to them since they'll most likely never actually meet me for reals but I don't want to do that. It's actually quite a hard situation to be in.
+ikram sahraoui Sid is Pashtun and we are different both in culture and language to the majority of pakistanies and half of us are in Afghanistan and half on pakistan nothern areas called KhyberPakhtunKhwa and Balochistan..
Peaceful Vibez I'm sure you know that kids tend to go to their fathers side not their mother? And you getting annoyed by my comments is not something I give a fk about! Cheers
ive been with my boyfriend for about 3 years too. hes african (south sudanese) and im croatian but we both live in Australia. my dad pretends he doesnt exist now but before veins would pop out of his head. im loosing hope that they can ever have a normal relationship..... :(
+DisturbedArab If you have any brothers who are old enough to be your mahram, then they are your mahram. But if you do not have any brothers, then your mahram is your mothers oldest brother (your uncle). If your mother does not have any brothers, and her dad is not alive (your grandfather), then you ask a sheikh. I hope this information helped you.
Actually people here don't know what they are talking about. Its bad when people try to make their own guesses in Islamic Jurisprudence. the girls father or grandfather is only the guys whom the girl should ask for approvel. if both are not alive, girl can marry on her own without anybody else permission. no mother, no brother permission required.
+Aiyla Halim Well as i said earlier to make your family like bros, sis, mother n uncle on board for marriage is good thing but what i m trying to say is only Girl's father n grandfather has the authority to deny n accept the marriage proposal of his daughter. bros, Sheikhs, mothers don't have right to do so but since its common in our cultures so people think its compulsion in Islam. if those 2 r dead, girl can marry anyone without anybody permission. i hope u get it now.
