QI | Innuendos and Rude Bits 

Phil is wonderful.

I couldn’t make out the question: How many muscles are there _____ your fingers?

@@poptacular6625 in your fingers.

@@McKavian Hmmm, I hear something that sounds like "instant" before he says "in" but that doesn't make sense.

@@poptacular6625 he says "how many muscles are there, incidently, in your fingers"

You should get the audiobook edition. "Stephen pumps his custard. The end of his hose gushes a great plume skyward with sudden force. The presented flame ignites Stephen's massive eruption in a hot, flaming jet. Everyone cheers ... and relaxes ... sated for the moment."

Nigel Williams I thought so too! I can relate though, I have a woman come around almost as often... usually leaves the place a disheveled mess if I’m honest.

So glad I wasn’t the only one who appreciated that! It was so funny I was ironically not laughing because I was so impressed by how clever and quick-witted it was

That joke could be in every compilation on qi and I wouldn't be disappointed.

XD yep

It's so good that straight white men can laugh at it and not piss of lesbians. Dont like everything about Sandi, but her deadpanerism and quick quips are amazing.

Especially when Julian Clary is on!

I really do wish it were longer, imagine how good that would be

@@thomasnolastname8734 no innuendo intended...

I love the one where Stephen is talking about the card game Find The Lady. Jimmy Carr says "I played that game in Thailand once and had a bad experience." And Stephen replies "Did you feel a bit of a dick?" 😂

And with CC too

Indeed. Cut of at the high point of pumping custard... :P

I know, they took us to the edge...

Yeah, now we all have blue whales.

I also wish they would play the other clips a bit longer, so you know what the answer of the question was, or where the bear grylls story headed.

@@piotrmil (KLAXON) *BLUE WHALE*

I guess you haven't seen Frankie Howerd in "Up Pompeii" then, he used to use that line all the time when he was trying to deliver is monologue to camera.

@@Beckford4000 Ooh, stop it. No.

That episode has one of the best anecdotes of the whole series as well, when Julian met the Queen.

@@vhaarr I believe Julian’s anecdote, about the time he accidentally “shat himself”, when he met the Queen, was in his previous Qi appearance; the episode was called “Differences”, and also featured Jo Brand, and Dara Ó Briain (along with Alan Davies, obviously)...and yes, I’m well aware of how sad I am, for knowing both the name of the episode, and who else was on the panel haha. In my defence, it’s one of my favourite episodes; not only that, but I watched it recently, and have seen it dozens- if not hundreds of times (and that is no exaggeration) before...which I realise only further adds to my being a very sad, sod haha. It’s such a fantastic episode, and Julian Clary is really on form, making both Alan Davies, and Jo Brand, cry with laughter, at his Queen story; I can’t remember exactly, but I recall seeing an interview, with Alan Davies, where he said something about Julian’s story being one of his favourite moments on the show, and that he (Julian) made everyone absolutely lose it during the taping. I would have loved to have been in the audience for that episode, to see how long it took for everyone to regain their composure; I imagine they probably had to edit out a great deal of it, for time constraints haha. Hope you, your loved ones, and anybody that sees this reply of mine. are keeping safe, well, and sane, during these messed up times. 🤞😀🤞 All the very best. 👍😀

Can someone explain the joke/innuendo?

Luke Dodson he and Bill Bailey. When those 2 were on it was just a matter of time when they would bring Stephen down 😂😂😂

@@ilovemydog6847 Phil, Bill and Alan bounce off each other brilliantly, and when they (either as two or three) were in the mood, poor Stephen wouldn't stand a chance

Ringtone?

@@alumbo Audio loop to fall asleep to

I used to have a ringtone of him from QI saying, "Now what you need is length and thickness"

as raw as it'll get in this video at about 2:17 ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-LVJ8lk50TS4.htmlm40s

*"OH MY GOD....."*

But absolutely brilliant!!! Had to pause the show to stop laughing...

Without a moment’s hesitation, what an absolutely beautiful delivery

See what you did there ;)

I must trust your word since I can only get "... twice a week".

@@19Edurne "i have a woman in twice a week"

And then Liza Tarbuck runs with it. You just don't get that grade of comedy in every day ordinary telly.

Michael Gibb Freudian slits - er, slips - as he says.

His obliviousness and innocence is what makes it

That was defo intentional

I'd say most of them look intentional to me. I mean, we haven't been saying YourAnus for decades.

All his lines are scripted

He is contracted to be a goofball.. sort of

He's there to act the clown across from Stephen's drier /intellectual humour. It's often said that Alan is very clever, it just takes a bit of watching him to realise that most of the things he says are very deliberate and extremely funny. You can see the same dynamic between David Mitchell and Lee Mack in Would I Lie To You

@@tomparry9829 Alan & Stephen's connection was Amazing, they way the flowed together, but also like the cheeky Kid & the Headmaster with a sense of humour 🥰 plus I am really liking Sandy as she has that similar Headmistress Quality but in her own way & not trying to be another Stephen

I love Sandi as host- not more than Stephen, just in a different way (oo-er!)- I love the way Alan's particular brand of childishly absurd pythonesque humour can make her genuinely crack up (like in the bum-biting beetle/5-headed caterpiller bit or his Julie Andrews impression) makes for fantastic tv.

@@peterclarke7240 I agree. Sandi is just as good Stephen hosting QI but different. The show is equally enjoyable with either host in my opinion. Alan is very good and has a great sense of humour but sometimes he can get a bit irritating. The 5 headed catapiller rant and the Julie Andrews impersonation were epic comic gold. He is quite smart as he can answer some of questions being asked. QI is a very well thought out show. I love it.

To be fair, a lot of what Julian says *is* deliberate innuendo.

that's what she said

@@20shourya "There's just too many double entendres!..." -Phil Jupitus

With no music.

I can't even try to guess what does it mean

@@potmki6601 Steven meant how Phillip Schofield's first TV show (a children's TV show set in a broom cupboard) but the joke is that Steven and Phillip (recently) are both openly gay and of course unlike hetrosexual relationships, homosexual relationships are not based on preference it's just anyone else so Philip Schofield's hand might be up Steven's arse as we speak

@@jenna443 > and of course unlike hetrosexual relationships, homosexual relationships are not based on preference it's just anyone else somehow it became less clear

@@potmki6601 sorry just a bit of a rant, just read until "unlike" 😂

@@jenna443 If you think that gay people don't have preferences on partners, you couldn't be more wrong. Most gay men I know are incredibly picky.

On the contrary, I think it's aged incredibly well given the revelations about PS! LOL

@Walt F., I once lived with a lady in Edmonton, Canada who told me that she'd worked legally as a prostitute in Las Vegas and Rodney Dangerfield was one of her clients. She also told me that he wore the most disgustingly filthy underpants that she'd ever seen and that he was one of the main reasons that she got out of that profession.

"High intelligent"! XD

Oh, you're beastly and I hate you...!

QI: high intelligence, low brow humor.

@@sirandrelefaedelinoge I know, I just realised and I am.....just sorry

What background music?!

No kiddin. Fucking annoying

@@annother3350 are you terminally stupid?

It was my idea to put the music in. I told the uploader it would be necessary and pleasing.

@@CooterCoy well you got that wrong, dummy

Think Stephen is a little too old for Philly schof 😜

@@nadolfc8008 And, vice versa 😂

​@@nadolfc8008SF's husband is about 30 years younger than him.

Odd question though, because if it was done without one's knowledge, how would one know?

@@lavrentivs9891 When one's dirthole has been burgled, there is always telltale evidence after the fact.

If it's with your knowledge, is it a burgle?

@@LynxSouth It might have been with your knowledge, but not with your permission.

@@lavrentivs9891 Somehow, I have the sense that, if you know about it, it's a robbery, not a burglary.

And a godless proof.

Yes, but he actually started in drama and was very serious about it all 😎

@@corriedebeer799 Many of us are dear. The last time I saw a vagina I was coming out of one. Never seen one up close since and never had the urge to look. And God's not welcome in my house unless he brings a bottle of wine and takes his shoes off. It might be a house of sin but we have standards.

@@adelucas4824 Jesus is welcome in your house though. He is great with the garden sheers. Your hedges have never looked better since Jesus of Mexico city came into your life..

and a fantastic one at that

He probably wasn't really

Yep, and quit ending the video like this one, before the custard explosion..........which I found else where. Like others have said, quit the fair ground muzak too.

The word annoying is SO overused by people who have no vocabulary skills....

@@sirandrelefaedelinoge How about shitty, crap, irritating, boring, useless, stupid for some alternatives?

@@sirandrelefaedelinoge how many languages do you speak?

Complains about free content. lol.

I.. already commented this, 7 months ago xD

that's what she said

New Message Mine are singularly unspectacular...........apparently.

I bet they are

There's a rough rehearsal before the show is recorded . As brilliant as Stephen is, I'm pretty sure he comes up with a few ideas beforehand. :)

Ok, I'll say it for you......vagina........

Don't forget "the finger slips in smoothly"!

Was Stephen livid? He was f- dis custard! Oh, with a hand pump?

yes he does.

@@lkytdsvc yep 5:51 'back alley too' a good example of deliberate innuendo.

"I do like something warm inside me of a morning" , classic Clary. That phrase has stuck with me for years.

Yeah except the idiot poster thinks he did us a favor. The stupid twat.

The sound of Muzak will not entertain?

@@zapkvr isn't this the official channel?

It's probably best if you got none of the joke in this video lol

@@HakingMC And why is that, pray tell?... Do you think my sensible ears need to be spared? The ones I get are hilarious and I don't feel offended at all, thank you very much for your concern. :)

@@19Edurne Lol, I would think the ones you didn't get are the dirty ones, hence the prior statement. But yeah sure, don't let me stop you from knowing.

"rude" in this context does not mean disrespectul, it just means "dirty joke" as in it is a rude topic to be talked in public.

@@gandaruvu I'm afraid "rude" -in the sense of too rude to be talked in public - is a thing of the past. I can't think of any topic that can't be talked in public in our day and age. Rude as in 'disrespecful' on the other hand is at an all time high...

Nice.

Emily Sumpter. It's spelt l i c k

I've got 86th

nice

It took me a second to click but it had me laughing

The question is valid. He could have had his dirt burgled without his knowledge, then someone told him it happened or showed him video of it happening.

Apparently, "Tail end or front?"

lol thank-you