r/InsaneParents - ALPHA BABY 💪👶 

Jesus Christ, that's vile!

I'm so sorry for you❤

What. The actual. Fuck? What a disturbing thing to do...

She doesnt deserve to know her grandkids and your kids dont deserve to be around peeps like her, so good on you! And neither do you, nor you lady. She sounds like shes mentally exhausting to be around, you know, soul vampire. Run free, run far and be happy!

How can she walk around when she has such a shriveled heart and soul

The OP said that “SHE told him that he is not her father anymore”. She was tired of all of his bs and told him that they are done. Not the other way around. All the power to her 👏🏻

Very, very true.

@@butterflypooo well i must have misheard smthng. Anyway my point still stands

@@wiktorszymczak4760 Click quoted it incorrectly, that’s all. But yeah, I agree w ur point.

Facts

I can comfirm

There are literally studies proving this... Also, well, the history of serial killers' childhoods...

Me too.

depends, one can be strict in a consequent and respectful way, without compleatly overdoing it and provide just as much reliable support as guidance. the supposedly strict parents you are talking about are abusive parents . . . big difference! so much abuse gets excused with "just being strict"!

I can't believe I've never heard that saying before because that is great! I'm definitely saving that one for later

Totally

As they say, true imposters don’t have imposter syndrome

If you aren't sure your doing it all wrong a few times a year, you are

Reminds me of how my mom always goes, 'Children are supposed to fear their parents! You can't just do this to your mother!' I am so looking forward to escaping from that house.

@@user-ly1lq4pn4wI know your comment is old but I hope you‘re okay and you have the opportunity to leave that household soon. Stay strong! I‘m rooting for you!

R/ChaoticGood, really wish i could see their reaction to that.

The only legal misgendering

My favorite thing to do to transphobes is correct their “spelling” “Oops you forgot the s on she, not that im your english teacher, just dont want you to feel embarassed for being incorrect when youre well aware that shes a girl 😊”

I don't wanna be that guy, but 600 likes? Holy shit that's the highest number of likes ever on any comment I've ever made. Glad it was for a joke tbh. Thanks for likes!

@alexandracalvert5681 maybe don't talk about correct spelling when you said im instead of I'm.

"Stop crying or I'll beat you" -Shi*y parents

yeah exactly?! fucking hate that shit, what do they expect. although… it did kind of “””work””” in my case. I was in environments where I was p much surrounded by that kind of rhetoric for years, day in day out, and now I struggle to cry normally. either I drop at most 3 tears if I’m lucky or I feel crying coming on and the ingrained response where I immediately start stifling the tears pops up 💀 (I learned multiple techniques in my own over those years of this shit) so essentially I’ve been fucked over so bad my tear ducts did stop, but not really intentionally.

It does work, in the wrong way. If you can stop your tears willfully, it’s not healthy.

I mean, it does work, but then you just become emotionally constipated for the rest of your life :/

When I start crying, it can take an hour to stop, even if I'm no longer upset. My father will yell at me to stop crying and then gets mad when I dont.

This is just vile

We need there to be parent licenses, where if you don't have a license, you don't get your tax benefits

watdafaq

Perfect serial evidence for CPS

Is on this moments when people think abortion is a good idea to avoid a life of abuse for the child?? I mean people is always saying " the " baby" deserves a good life..." But what good life are they talking about if the child is getting abused until they are old enough to get out??

My sister broke her arm trying to prove some boys wrong about how "girls can't be strong". She refused to let my mom take her to the hospital because she was scared she would have to get a cast and never get to do gymnastics again. Her mentality was "if I don't know it's broken, then it's not broken". My mom agreed, because she wasn't in any obvious pain. But two days later, when her arm continued to be red and swell, she took her to the hospital for an x-ray.

Around 10th grade, I was at school & not feeling well. Sent to nurse, nurse says I have a fever, sends me home. My father comes home about 30 minutes later & finds me in bed. He takes me back to school, kicks me out of the car, tells me not to ever come home sick again. Thankfully my English teacher had no problem with me passing out in the back of her class on the few occasions I needed it 🤣 Oh and that reminds me of the time I had some kind of allergic reaction and my eyes swelled shut. Slightly terrifying, so I asked to go to the hospital. My father asks me _what did you put in your eyes??_ - um, nothing I have no idea what's going on here, can we go to the hospital? Nope, beating instead. For "lying". But the swelling went down a day or two later & never recurred, so I got that going for me, which is nice.

Is your foot ok now?

@@mallninja9805is everything okay now matey 😃 are you an adult and moved out from that household?

When I was young I accidentally slammed my thumb in my dads car door. We didn’t even know it was fractured till the next day but it was kinda more my fault than his. Sure I had the normal reaction at first. I cried for about 30 minutes. Then was the unusual part. You’d think a 5 year old who had just fractured his thumb would have cried for more than 30 minutes. You’d also think there’d be no way in hell he could move it while claiming not to experience much pain later that night. So I don’t fault my dad for his disbelief at first. I didn’t even know it was fractured. I seemed alright and when my dad took me to the doctor the next day just to be sure that’s when we found out. I honestly in hindsight feel bad because I felt like I should be experiencing more pain for a literal fracture, but you live and learn ig

Parenting is a job Their relationship with their adult children is their performance rating

HalleluSatan

l u c k y - i’m not even in therapy yet, and even then i’m not aloud to talk about “family” issues there- 💀 on a better note, hope y’all’s days are going better

For me. I have a physiatrist instead of a therapist. But still my parents sit in on my appointments. I mean. It’s good that we found out I’m autistic. But that’s about it. No comfort for *anything.* My parents always say I’m fine. I’m touch starved to the point where I’m extremely cold. I absolutely despise myself. And I was extremely close to doing something to myself. And even now I think that nothing will change until I’m out of the house. I’m a gay trans female with anti LGBTQ parents.

@@shadowking278 Hope things get better once you're out. Hang in there the best you can.

Aww

It is a fun fact, but this is kinda like saying "The biggest tiny thing is still kinda tiny"

Is it as fuzzy as a kiwi?

Nice

I looked it up, and they're so adorable!

Yeah, doing a good job of being a complete a-hole, that's the only bit they're doing right

I mean she did fail her parental mission very succesfully I'd say.

That woman would probably be thrilled that I legitimately fantasized KILLING my stepfather starting at the age of 10 just to get away from what he did. He's dead now (not murdered), and I celebrated that fact. Like great job, all right! Really great job...

it's the opposite really

​@@FederalBurroOfInvestigationNot murdered..suuure. 😉

this is way too relatable

@@kiroesalt ❤️

Felt. Absolutely felt.

@@wintig245 take care & never give up on healing ❤️

Remind me of what my grandma said to her kids: Whether out of love or fear, you will respect me. If my dad didnt convince my mom we "needed our grandparents" she wouldve gone no contact

Specially if he’s being insane

The insanity is a feature, not a bug 😌

…but what if everytime Click wears the Karen wig it gets stronger?! 😱

​@@TheNormExperience do you think will it gain sentience and take him over like a brain slug? the odds are low, but never zero...

Not y’all making lore to wigs 💀

😂

This would make a good movie. Like the kidnapper adopts the kid and they help each other get over their past stuff.

​@@TomatoRadioHe ain't the kidnapper anymore, he's the "kidsaver"

@@bellabluerose3212 THE ANTI-KIDNAPPER, THE KIDAWAKER!

@Jade_4ded WOOHOO!!

I guess the next generation will be "betas" then. I don't envy having to deal with the "jokes" they'll be subjected to. Then again, maybe it'll dispel that stupid alpha/beta myth. It *still* amazes me that it originated from a faulty study of wolf behavior...

and soon it's going to be generation beta in 2024 or it's 2026. this was the reason I clicked on this video. I'm always surprised when people call 12 year olds or 10 year olds Gen Z. because they are Gen Alpha, it does make sense though for those without kids or planning to have kids to not know this though so I can see why

@@nevermindmyparentsimthepunk I feel like I wouldn’t know this even if I had kids

@@nevermindmyparentsimthepunk By what I’ve been told, 2015 and under is gen z. So both of them would be gen z.

@@3.-HyperCandy-.4 Nope my Fiancé is Gen Z he was born in 1998. Gen Z starts mostly in 1997

I’m adopted too! My mom loves to bring up the fact that nobody else would’ve adopted me as a child and would have grown up “loveless” and because of that I owe her the world. I blocked her for good last month after trying to get her to care about me for years. Never felt better blocking the toxicity and hatred.

I never understood this. If you don't like kids, why are you adopting them?? You literally have to go through hoops (at least in my country) to be even CONSIDERED as a candidate for adoption. It's an extremely long process. It's also expensive. Why knowingly go through all that, only to complain later? As you said, it's not like an unplanned pregnancy, where you're suddenly scrambling to get everything together. This is a conscious choice. You're literally taking in a child who may or may not have trauma and needs unconditional love. If you know that you're unable to give that love, why are you adopting a child?

They say they didn't do the thing they literally did

@@ZimVader-0017 Honestly a lot of it is people who have the mentality of "I rescued you from (traumatic situation) so you should be forever grateful for any crumbs of affection I give to you" when that's just not how people and especially children operate

@@ZimVader-0017 They ended up with a child with anxiety, depression, potential ADHD and/or Autism (Getting referred for both.) who is pansexual and goes by any pronouns who has trauma and is a therian, furry and system. They definitely did not realise the amount of mental issues I had when they adopted me 😅. The sad truth is, they were going to adopt a boy before me, but he had too many mental issues for them to effectively cater to but then they ended with me 🙃 Edit: I had to literally argue with my mum to get referred for the ADHD and Autism. Also I mentioned I wanted to change my name because my name just doesn't sit right when I hear it said and she said "Oh please don't, it's such a lovely name and it's what everyone knows you as. Please don't." In a way you would talk to a five year old to coerce them to do something. If I even mention any mental illness that is not depression or anxiety she just says it's "Just a label." Or "You sure it isn't just *insert other thing which isn't even like the original thing*." She has been doing a slight bit better but I think it's only because I mentioned I was having negative thoughts to my doctor.

Congratulations on finally getting out of a terrible situation.

Congratulations. I'm proud of you for walking away and prioritizing your well being. There may be moments where you feel guilt or doubt for walking away, but your happiness and safety are more important and you deserve respect and dignity. Good luck and know that you're strong.

YES! Eternal suffering for them. >:3 Hope you’re out there living your best life. :3

Good for you. Congratulations. Your life will be better.

Further proof that clicky thiccy is the goat

I still find it kinda messed to even just threaten him with it, considering she knows first-hand what it does to someone. Why not go with "if you don't clean up, you'll not get any _more_ stuff" instead? It gets the point across that you can only get new stuff if there's space to put it (which is a pretty good mindset regardless of age), without making the kid fear for their toys.

@@rolfs2165 I tried to talk to her about but she got mad and told me I had no idea what I was talking about because I'm not a parent. I may not be a parent but I was a child with an extremely emotionally abusive parental figure and I know first hand what that can do to a person later in life. My biggest fear is that he's so young and if she keeps making threats like this while he's still developing, it could affect him even worse than it affected me. I was about 10 when my stuff started getting taken away and I developed some severe paranoia and anxiety around my property. My nephew is almost 4, way younger than I was, meaning he's still in the early stages of social development. I'm worried about how he'll develop socially considering he also shows signs of autism and ADHD, which is already a disadvantage for him. Unfortunately, I know she won't listen to me because I'm younger and not a parent. Also, having my stuff taken away so often ingrained in me the belief that I don't own anything and everything I have isn't actually mine, meaning I don't deserve it. I don't want him growing with that same mentality.

@@luniewhipple3513 I want to add that most psychologists on say that punishing a child with adhd is near impossible especially if the parent doesn’t take into account that they have adhd or the child isn’t diagnosed. The best way to even attempt to punish a child is to have them loon you in the eyes you tell them what they did wrong have them truly acknowledge it and then give the punishment and why you are doing it. Things like negative punishment (punishment that takes something away for those not in the know with the terms) tend to particularly not work. All of this is because of how the brain works with adhd, its constantly seeking dopamine so tends to go fast, meaning it’s harder to catch a child in the time frame punishment actually works, near immediately to the act. If the child isn’t actively actually taking In why they are being punished the point is null and the punishment doesn’t work. Generally doing this with neurotypical kids helps anyway so it really should be the go to. Another point is most adhd behavior is seen as something that deservers punishment especially around where I live, so punishment for something a child can’t control harms the child mentally and also make punishments less likely to work. This applies to ANYONE in the child’s life so teaching a child with adhd to watch their teacher for punishing adhd behavior is extremely important. Overall you want to use reinforcement at least equally or more then punishment. Reinforcement is overall better then constant punishment even if the punishments aren’t severe. If you have to punish, generally only is they’ve caused some sort of pain, it’s best to talk through with them why they are being punished for it before hand.

This was a common punishment when I was a kid too. We would be grounded for days at a time which meant you had to sit on your bed and do nothing. Not even nap. Obviously as kids we couldn't last that long without getting up so, to get rid of distractions, my dad took everything out of my room except for my bed and dresser. I was recently diagnosed with ADHD and I often wonder if I had it back then too and how things could've been different if it had been treated.

The scary thing is, my dad was like that too, tossing almost everything if it wasn't cleaned up in time. And his name is also Dustin.

literally needed this

Oh hey, you're here too. Hello hungry latias. And yeah, a good chunk of people need this.

This is so sweet, i needed this today

Living a good life to spite those who don't want you to do so is the best way to handle those mfers.

Thank you, I needed this today ❤

I pity those kids that might be going through situations like I had, right now. Even though phones are so common, now, there are bound to be abusive parents out there like the ones I had that make 150% sure their kid has no means of contacting anyone outside the household, whatsoever. No computer, no internet, no cell, no landline, attempts to sabotage any seeds of friendships, using mind games to make it so adults at school will even think everything out of the kid's mouth is a lie, aaand not even anywhere to runaway to, as they love to live miles away from other houses - let alone towns. Even the abundance of phones in the lives of the majority won't help those kids.

​@@crystallinethunder in some places the abuse can be streamed life to public and the parents may face no consequences. I'm Polish and there was an incident with a patostreamer (patological streamer, usually it means getting as drunk as possible in front of the camera for money). For days, maybe even weeks or months a family of 5 streamed their lives inside their home 24/7. For a very long time it showed the bad condition the 3 children had to live in, the dad was getting drunk all the time and was verbally and physically violent towards the children, especially the oldest 7 year old boy. The mom didn't do anything and turned a blind eye whenever the dad was yelling for no reason or threatening to kill the child. One day the dad got maybe too drunk or just too blind with rage and almost killed the boy by strangling. The mom reacted only when the child started desperately gasping for air and stopped screaming for help (possibly because he was close to passing out). It was all streamed live. Only then child services reacted (they have been notified by that family before multiple times) and luckily the children were given to a foster family. Even recordings won't be enough in a broken system that ignores children's wellbeing

@@billcipher8645 Prime example of how bad it really is. To think that even the tech available doesn't improve a kid's chances much more than being in a situation like what I grew up in. It's sad and desperately needs fixed.

Somewhere I still have a few 90-minute tapes where I recorded some of my mother's tantrums berating me for hours pretty much every day. I recorded them with a Walkman. It didn't help.

As someone with terrible parents I'm sure we'll be alright. Don't worry too hard. Our generation is healing a lot of what's happened to us.

Try not to worry. One good thing is going to talk to a professional counselor is actually seen as a good thing and helpful. This helps balance things out a bit. Also seeing most of the the generations in my area most are good people and doing their best.

As a teenager, Yes, the world's minds are rotting, but, it's best to ignore it as it can't really be fixed.

If I had a choice between reliving my childhood and not being born, I'd literally rather have never existed.

Addendum; Life can get better as an adult. It's not guaranteed, but it's worth it to try, even if you had shitty parents. If I can make things even marginally better for myself, anyone can. 👍

That’s why I never understood Christianity. It’s not free will if i didn’t ask to exist.

I'm glad you found yourself. You deserve to be happy. Make sure to treat yourself, and have a hood day. You are worth it.

You cant be replaced, youre one of a kind and no one else could ever be you. People love you for you, so make it count. This thought helped me thru some dark times, hope it can help you now, I think Ill leave it with you :)

Yeah I get threatened with that by my parents

It's always so sobering to hear someone talk about how these crazy parent behaviors affected them long after the events. Thank you for sharing, and, quite frankly, spreading awareness. I assume most people who watch the channel are of a similar mindset, but I think it's important to hear about the consequences from people who experienced it.

I think I have the opposite effect. since my mother equated taking my favorite things to punishing me directly, I subconsciously consider literally everything I own AS an extension of myself. I find it painful to get rid of things and have seriously almost fought people because I freak out when anyone touches my stuff.

I mean in the dad's defense: Garlic IS really good for immune support, and ginger is good for Nausea (and I've used lemon ginger tea to ground during really bad anxiety attacks.) He's trying in his own way... maybe just not with Cinnamon like Click thinks. 😂😂

@@kaelin_cherise Good point. And if that's the most crazy thing a dad does, they've won the lottery on the parent front!

@JWildberry I mean it's like the parents who go holistic (everything natural, everything organic) after having kids, in theory they're trying to do right by their kids and give them better lives than they had, but some just go crazy with it. It's when you go too far and ignore things like DOCTORS that we start calling you crazy.

Snorting spices will only damage the nose, throat, and lungs. Those powders are actually really sharp to breathe in

Yeah when you're having a cold eating a bit of spice actually helps especially ginger

use the money in their bank accounts to pay off mortgages and bills, then justify it with that same logic

Relatable. I get really attached to stuff and can become a bit spiteful when it is taken without my knowledge of it. And by spiteful I mean corvid spiteful

@@haybaleanimations2758 "someone took my belongings, activate Crow Mode™" *eviscerates and mauls*

I grew up in foster care, so I wasn't able to see my Mom often. On my 8th birthday, she had bought me a calico cat stuffed animal. I named her Patches, and she was my most cherished possession *ever,* my comfort item. And by the time I was 14, my Aunt had threw her frikkin away. I am 28 now and the memory still brings me immense rage to the point I see red, even when it happens to other people. I'll NEVER forgive my Aunt and she can have fun with me not going to her funeral. 😡🤬😤 I don't let ANYONE I don't trust touch my stuff without my permission, and I don't trust a lot of people. Even just people helping me to move is anxiety inducing. *Don't touch my frikkin stuff.* 🤬😡

​@haybaleanimations2758 I'm now going to use the term "Corvid Spiteful" for when someone touches or takes my stuff.

It's mostly the parent who wonder if their being a good parent who end up being the best parents.😊

@@paolaadames8028 ❤️ thanks. He's 16, speaks to me openly about pretty much anything, does fairly well in school and has a good group of friends who somehow think I'm cool. Yet there's always doubt.

Yes, mom-guilt can make you feel horrible, even if you are a fantastic mother. But the fact that you feel it, is a sign you really care about your kiddo. Nobody is perfect, but as long as the kids are happy, stay mentally/physically healthy and have a good social life, we are doing good.

That you're even worried about it means you're already miles ahead of insane parents. Most insane parents think they're always right and their way of parenting is perfect and correct and they wouldn't doubt themselves or think they might be at fault

@@BlueSodaPop_ that was my parents. Well, that and so much more. I love these videos because I'm not alone, there are others out there with nut jobs as parental units. I can cringe and laugh and feel better about how I'm raising my son.

That's absolutely horrible! I wish it were possible to sue the people who _assaulted you_ back when you were kids. Because it doesn't matter that they were kids … _they committed assault_ and _caused brain damage_ on their victim! And _they_ should be held at least financially-responsible for messing up another person's life. Those are people I wish the most horrible fates on.

What in the actual HELL?? That’s both devastating and terrifying. That should be grounds to sue _somebody._ Since you can’t sue your mom, arguably the people at the school. How old were you? After 13, that should go onto a permanent record as assault. I was told that the only reason I didn’t have assault on my record was because I wasn’t 13 after *grabbing a boy by the wrist.* Actual brain damage should _absolutely_ count as assault. If they weren’t old enough, then the school should be held responsible for letting that happen.

@@-alovelygaycat- Never underestimate how willing adults are to sacrifice children for their own convenience. I was 12 and this happened in 1989. The idea of calling the cops on a bunch of middle schoolers for assault was considered an absurd idea. They said "Kids have fights sometimes, so just walk it off" And I should take more time time to look like a little lady if I didn't want the other kids to think I was a lesbo. ...Yeah, I know that doesn't make sense. LGBT+ were dying regularly at the time. Nobody cared. If you were openly gay, you died. Boomers were always Boomers, and they were HORRIBLE parents.

@@John_Weiss I did look them up recently. The main one that started it and kicked me in the head is currently in prison for SA'ing an 8-year-old in his family. Another is a single mom of three raising two of her grandkids while working as a cashier in a grocery store. The last one became a cop. 😑

@@widowkeeper4739 I hope the cop gets busted for letting/participating in the killing of Yet Another African-American man. Not that I want to see Yet Another African-American man killed by a cop. But we all know it's going to happen. 😠 So why not that piece of sh1te being the one to go down for doing it? As for the other two, karma's a b1tch. (I don't know if you want to, or if it would be safe to, but the cop … maybe you could find _someone_ to slip a message to about him beating you and causing lifelong brain damage, and ask that he be looked into for police brutality. Because a shart like that almost certainly has done so.)

Yeah, based on soap-making vids cinnamon can cause pretty major irritation of sensitive skin areas, so putting it regularly in contact with mucus membranes sounds not okay, esp. if child's already prone to nasal & bronchial irritations?

I mean - not recognizing ADHD and autism is bad but ... I don't know your gender, but for example girls are severely under diagnosed even by therapists and parents ... sometimes just aren't able to recognize it. Since ADHD and Autism are very stereotypically portrayed in media. That is why - Whenever I talk to teachers and have the chance, I ask them about searching up signs for autism and ADHD since teachers at least have some training in working with kids. More than parents. So they would be able to see the signs easier when a kid is ''weird''

@@lilysnape6520 especially when you consider that the first person to be diagnosed with autism is still alive. There’s just very little we know about the disorder, especially since most of the research is based off of amab people.

I really hope you can get diagnosed. Just knowing can help so much. I have both High Funtioning Autism and ADHD, and knowing that can be so helpful in just understanding yourself. I hope everything works out for you.

And also I think most of ADHD tests were made from testing mostly young white boys

@@cztianaki2689 Man I always forget my autism is considered a disorder. In a lot of the circles I’m in it’s not really referred to like that so it’s always funny coming across comments like this. Gives me a bit of whiplash.

That's an interesting idea, I'd never thought of it that way. I wonder if that ties into some of the reasons child-free adults get so much hate. "I had to suffer through raising children, it's not fair that you don't suffer as well!"

@@PenguinLord10 Oh absolutely. Misery loves company. A good number of the mean ones didn't realize or even have the option to not have kids (depending on age and upbringing), and often times are resentful and jealous seeing that their lives could have been way different. They take it out on childfree people a lot. That's how you get tired parents covered in mess and screaming children telling others actively how it's different when it's your kids and how much you will love having kids. How it's so selfish to spend money on yourself (especially "wasting money" on nice little things, quality of life improvements, etc, let alone vacations or a nice vehicle or home...) instead of raising the next generation. How greedy cf people are entitled jerks and what's wrong with the world these days... All that tiring nonsense. I have compassion for anyone who had kids before they were able to realize they had the option not to. I'm in my 30s and grew up in a fundamentalist group where unmarried women and married couples without children were simply pitied for the tests god was putting them through. I didn't realize I actually truly had an option not to have kids AT ALL until I was married and "when do we know the right time to have kids?" was in discussion and I realized I didn't ever want to start. I liked my life as-is. That said, the blame for that goes on my upbringing. Not on childfree people. I was lucky enough to become cf in time. I feel bad for those who didn't, and also they need to direct their anger at the true source of their pain. It's society they grew up in, not cf folks.

​@@clocksideOne day, I wrote a random comment (under a video about asexuality) that I was still single and had no children. I recieved very rude replies that I didn't expected... When I could do what I want mirh my butt, guys told be: "you do nothing with your butt!" and explained me that I just had to make a guy happy cripping with him and having children (yes both parts were importants: sex AND children)😤.

@@grenade8572 I would have just replied “my legal obligation to men and children is not punting them off a bridge”

It's very easy for us Scandinavians who only pay a small fee to see the doctor, or even for big examinations and xrays, to forget the expenses that US citizens have to endure. Here it's "better with 100 examinations that turn out to be nothing" than that 1 missed one. Still, the way this guy wrote about it it doesnt sound like expense was the reason for not going😕

Yeah, that's the one thing I was thinking that might excuse that sort of thing, somewhat. Obviously you should do everything you can to make sure your children are healthy... but living in the US can make that difficult to do while still being able to provide them the necessities needed to... be healthy. It's incredibly fucked up, taking your kid to the doctor can actually be *worse* for them than not doing it. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness... but only for the people who can afford them.

Yeah, as a Scandinavian I always remind myself of that. For a lot of people, that check-up will take money out of the food budget, or means you can't afford rent that month. And then you fall behind, and things snowball. I called an ambulance when my dad had a dizzy spell when working in the garden. They assured me I did the right thing, they took him in to see the doctor, and it looked okay. To be safe they drove the one hour drive to the hospital. Turned out to be nothing. But would I have called if I was American? Or would I have gotten into my car to drive him to the doctor myself, and then the hospital if need be? Pretty sure I would drive, considering ambulance costs. Then the medical personnel would have gotten to him later, and my dad would have had to travel all that way without constant supervision, which could have killed him if there had been something wrong. It's scary to think about the fact that people have to make those decisions in a country that can afford the same healthcare system we have.

Fr fr theres been so many times that I’d had something wrong with me and didn’t go cuz it was too expensive I was partially deaf in one of my ears for like six months and only went cuz it started to hurt badly and then my kneecap dislocated wo reason (i was legit taking a nap shifted maybe three inches and boom) and I was super anxious to go to the doctor cuz what if it happened again?????!? And my parents said it would be way too fucking expensive so they got me a knee brace at Walgreens and called it a day. My uni just recently got a free student health clinic and I’m ecstatic to actually get healthcare without worrying about break the bank

@@Manthab Some unis have that? That's amazing! Maybe that will help push through a proper healthcare reform, if university "kids" learn how precious that peace of mind is. The effect it adds to a person's quality of life, both mentally and physically, is enormous.

Dear Celina, I'm sorry this is happening to you, I can not understand your mother's actions, but they are wrong for sure. Maybe the best would be if you could talk to your dad about it and have him as an adult speak to her, you deserve to see your little brother. I wish you healing and love

Well yeah, it's literally the Dunning Kruger Effect in action. The less people know (about parenting) the more they believe to know. The more people know, the more they understand how much they don't know.

Today I was talking with my mom about this, the best Dad's are the ones that think they will never provide enough for their children... My mom told me about her neighbor that has 3 boys, she as well has germophobia to the point she can spend an stire week eating incredible bad thinking " this is not clean enough for my children" at the end she fainted because there was nothing for her body to work with, she's a good mother, she just prioritized cleaning over her health

Today I was talking with my mom about this, the best Dad's are the ones that think they will never provide enough for their children... My mom told me about her neighbor that has 3 boys, she as well has germophobia to the point she can spend an stire week eating incredible bad thinking " this is not clean enough for my children" at the end she fainted because there was nothing for her body to work with, she's a good mother, she just prioritiz

You should be! You should in fact _remain_ salty with them about it for the rest of their lives, if they're still alive. Five decades with a malfunctioning important body part, because of their neglect and stupidity - that deserves far more than just "being salty" with them.

Don't worry, sweetie. I hope your donors get broken feet, too.

So are you saying Garfield runs a hive mind?

​@@LakinMae5 r\hold up

As an orange cat mom, I can confirm. Our dude went thru the front of closed drawer, like he brute forced the particle board to pieces, because his birdie toy “sleeps” in there and he wasnt having any of it. He also ate the birdie.. he chews my crocs, always just one of the pair. My last pair is hanging high on the coatrack, but now it looks like he has figured out how to climb there. He growls at thunder, like better back down now or catch these paws, same for delivery bots he sees outside. And Im pretty sure he tries to actively kill us by running at our feet when walking, or lying behind us when we stand. He doesnt get that we dont have cat-like reflexes or eyes in the back.. He understands the word no, he just dont care. Begging for people food he has honed into an art form, especially with my in-laws, they will give him anything he wants from the fridge or their plates whenever were there. Last Eastern he ran away/got lost, we went nuts looking for him, he just casually strolled back home week later, like no biggie, I took a lil holiday. Ive had many cats, but Onni, 2, is one of a kind. Definitely.

@@janemiettinen5176 i love your cat

@@sylmaerie I will tell him that, it probably inflates his already humongous ego, but Ill tell. And heres couple more to brighten your day, I tried to think really good ones. He gets to go out at the in-laws, so he brought once a mouse, other was bird, only problem was that they were still very much alive. You know, starling is huge when it flies indoors and has two eager cats chasing it! Both creatures got back in the nature more or less intact, thanks to my father-in-law, I could just scream-laugh while trying to avoid the zig-zagging mess. He thinks he is much bigger than his body this 5kg/10pound cat went after golden retriever and ran him (and his human) onto the next street.. They dont walk past our place anymore, FIL just heard rumors. He also has war going on with the neighbor cats, he goes right in their yard and eggs them on.. while they have zero business in ours. Ive tried to explain to him that they are residents and he is just visiting, so be nice, but to no effect. Last xmas he got to our ham, he just casually gnawed this meat clump, that was bigger than him.. and growled at me when I went to put him back down to the floor! MIL put him back and took pictures, she thought it was the funniest crap ever. I was mortified. Sometimes he riles himself up so thoroughly chasing invisible things, he puffs up and stays that way, like minutes. Im an artist, my studio was sacred, cat-free space before him; now I cant close the door, he will try to open it and when he realizes he cant, he yells so long I give in. Not faint meowing, but frustrated yelling, like hes ordering me to open immediately. Once inside, he looks me straight in the eyes, while flicking stuff down from the table, as saying “What if I do… THIS! How do you like them apples, huh?”. I soon learned to wear apron, even if just doing a quick retouch; my fave jeans have now paint stains, because he dropped my palette on my lap, while I wasnt watching him. He also ate really expensive and dear watercolor brush, like completely, only the ferrule had some hairs in it. I cried. I was on important Zoom call, so he hopped behind me, like right behind my head, and started to lick his junk with gusto, I nearly died right there. Even the doctor whom I was speaking with couldnt completely hide his surprise and amusement. Squirrel got momentarily stuck in our balcony (outer wall is made of sliding glass windows, its always open just a little) and luckily got out before the mayhem melons got to it, but Onni searched for it over 6 hours, his sister gave in after two. He continued his search the next day too. He just couldnt accept defeat, he seemed sure the furry steak will appear, if he just looks hard enough.. Hes notorious food thief; look away for a second and your sandwich toppings are gone. And I swear he gloats, husband has started to notice it too, this dude is being victorious. He even took a croissant straight out of my mouth, while I was texting! He didnt eat it, he just saw an opportunity and ran with it. Since hes very territorial, he growls at anyone who gets too close to our windows, so he has growled at little kids, because why not.. Im sure I forgot something juicy, but this is pretty good description of his greatest hits. Only thing that bothers him are crowds and car rides, everything else hes ok with. My 90yo grandma has to get his latest quirks every week, his antics make her happy. He turns 3 in June, but he has stories of several lifetimes.. We love him too, but some days its just tiny bit harder than others.

I swear aunts are either really cool or the bane of your existence

@@emh.170 Yes. Good thing I have two other, really cool Aunts that I love 😎

Oh no...that's awful! Who does that?! I'm grown now but as a teen I put some of my favorite, well kept, plushies up in the closet at my mom's house for safe keeping. My niece got to them and had clearly been playing with them, and my mom just said, "Well, you left them here so long; what does it matter?!" I about lost it. I wish I'd have been thinking clearly enough to say, "Oh? Well we better call the bank about 'your' savings then!" I got upset just reliving that. I'm on the spectrum with anxiety and do NOT like people in my room or touching my stuff. Also, big collection of plushies. In my late 30s and give zero fricks if that's "normal." It's not that I was upset with my niece, but the total lack of respect my mom had and has for me upsets me. Respecting other people's stuff is so basic, and if you're not watching your grandkid while they're in your house, then you tell them what they can't touch and where they can't go! Jesus even a 7 yr old understands no, but she never said no to my sister either, so I dunno what I expect. That was a few yrs ago and my niece is getting past playing with plushies now, so they just sit out at Mom's house. Compromise, I guess. My advice? Even if it's not the one you were given by your mom, if you have the means, replace the one you lost. Whisper its name to it and tell it that it now carries the emotions and memories of its predecessor. Will it be the same? No, but I've found it helpful for replacing items with strong sentimental value. ❤

@@Just1Nora 1. FRICK YOUR MOM FOR DOING THAT, OMG!!! THE AUDACITY! And 2. I could never, ever replace Patches. She was basically like a living, sentient individual to me since I believe certain physical items all have a soul. And she was the leader of my first stuffed animal group. I could never replace her, God forbid give some other stuffed animal her name! 😱 Sacrilege! XD Tbf tho, Patches had a daughter, a smaller stuffed calico cat I had named Stitch. Lost Stitch and my first stuffed animal group to my Aunt too. However, not long ago while playing Minecraft to RP one of my stories with friends, I had actually been inspired to name this calico MC cat I found in the game, and incorporated it into my story. I decided that, maybe, if I hold on to the tradition hard enough, I could have this new calico cat be what Stitch's son would be. So he would be Patches' grandson. Enough years have certainly passed for that. I also wanted to have the names remain associated with fabric and such, like with Patches and Stitch. So I chose to name this new cat Weaves. All that's left really is to possibly find a vessel for him irl, a new calico stuffed animal. Still a bit hesitant cuz it's a sensitive decision for me, but it does bring me even just a bit of hope and comfort. Gonna stop typing now before I start tearing up. ^^' Ty for hearing and understanding my experience tho. It's really comforting and validating.

People need to understand that if something belongs to somebody, don't just throw it out. I don't care what it is, ask their permission. I don't understand why people can't get that through their heads

Remember a story where as punishment for whatever, most of daughters clothes were taken. What they left behind sounds like basic goth. Her clothes were stuffed in trash bags and put in the attic. She was supposed to "earn" them back. Backfired. She liked not having to keep up with trends and worrying about what to wear. Parents were mad she didn't care about getting her clothes back. Her crime? She was caught smoking under the bleachers.

I'm surprised you let her over to your house That's big of you. I haven't had my mom over yet and I still don't plan on it

Can confirm, every single day I'm just amazed at how great my kid is. No other reward could measure up with this.

How did she try? Did She tell you how cool priest are or something like that

@@thesanguineseal7856 Religious camp, summer religious classes, having me read the bible nightly things like that.

Can't really recall everything she tried, but those are the general things I do remember.

How is it possible to turn a child into a priest? Was she hoping to just skip the teen and rebellious phase of a child’s life?

@@Loaves_of_Cat She wanted one of her kids to be a priest, and I was her fourth. So she really tried, now I am agnostic and will probably give a beer to the devil when I see him. Heck, she use to take me to abortion protests and treat me to waffle house. I didn't remember much about the protests but I liked getting an all star.

Did she end up taking you to urgent care or the hospital? And what was wrong with your eye?

@Cotton Candy 🍭🍬 Nope, I went to school and the nurse sent me back home. I got in trouble and didn't go to the hospital until the following week for a scheduled appointment. The swelling had gone down alot by then. It was a stye that had gotten big and all my rubbing got it infected. They gave me gel that I put myself but since I was a kid doing it, I had a lumpy eye for a long time.

@@doindaworst5824 I'm sorry you had to deal with that, that must've sucked

Whilst children _will_ lie about problems to get out of doing stuff, those lies are usually not very inventive (my tummy hurts), and not very consistent or thought-through. If a child keeps complaining about a very specific pain, in the exact same place, for more than an hour, they are probably not lying.

​@@doindaworst5824 what the fuuuuuuuuuuu What a baitch

Narcissists looking for their supply.

As a survivor of a narcissistic parent, I'm just really glad that this subreddit exists, because it can really help people understand their own abusive situation. I know that from an outside perspective, these parents seem very extreme in their abusive behaviour - and they are - but when you're a child who has always been treated that way, you're sort of "used to it", so you can't see the situation very clearly. I left as soon as I was 18, because I knew I was going to die in my parental house if I didn't escape, but at the same time, I didn't realise I was being abused. My father never hit me. So... why was I feeling so horrible? It was only when I was like 25 that I said out loud for the first time that I had been abused. I still find it hard to say, because I'm terrified that people will say that that was not "real" abuse. It's so insidious, because it's "just words", but it does a tremendous amount of damage still. I think that's why it's important that people who are in that situation get a chance to see someone else being abused that way and realise that it is really that bad. I thought that maybe there was something wrong with me for feeling so terrible, because I couldn't take a step back to look at the situation until years after I left it. I was scared that I was just being overdramatic for a long time. I don't wish that upon anyone else.

@@ninawth Psychological Abuse is _still abuse._ Your experiences are Valid. Your emotions are Valid. Your suffering is Valid and you Are Entitled to Heal.

I now have a question. What is the opposite of the name Karen? In terms of being a pure gold hearted person?

@@shadowking278 wouldn’t it be a Good Samaritan or something?

Same We are lucky my friend we are lucky Ratio

Same. I love my parents. And even more after watching these videos or listening to my own patients with mental struggles😢

This! Whatever their flaws, every time I hear about other people's parents, I feel very happy about mine.

here here

I've seen so many similar messages! It doesn't make me happy, but I feel validated at least. If any parent was looking to prevent this, then all they have to do is see us admitting our trauma turned us hoarders. Yay. 😐

I wanna give you more hope: I survived it and grew up to be pretty stable and happy adult. You can do this!

i hope you find a real family that loves you and appreciates all the good things about you. i also hope your "parents" always have to pee at the worst times and can't take it out on anyone.

Well now I’m curious, what’s you first favorite?

@@breathoffresherin9066 ...furryirl...💀 lol

@@Rob_Boss99 lmao thanks for satisfying my curiosity.

As someone who grew up with an abusive mother and have full intent to move out ASAP now that I'm 21, I'm really really happy you got to have a really great relationship your parents, haha. That is very sweet to thank them for being great every time you see it. I hope all goes well with them forever more!

What your mom did actually sounds reasonable. You had plenty of time so if you lost anything it was ultimately your decision. The ones we see in insaneparents just like bullying

That one was kinda stupid anyway. What does that person think who is going to have to shell out to replace all that stuff? Especially since they apparently went and took out *everything* including stuff they'd need for school.

This is one of those "everything is a spectrum" things, and your mom was on the reasonable end. Mine played "trash or treasure" where she'd hold up the thing and you had to either find a place for it or she'd throw it out. It was stressful and it was definitely a threat of "put this away or I'm throwing it out right now". But it's not like she ever tossed anything we needed, and she gave us a chance to save things.

Take care as best you can 💜 You are not alone

I’m proud of you for making the decision to come out, remember that you still have a whole community out here for you with open arms! Biggest advice I have is, blood is thicker than water, the blood of the coven is thicker than the water of the womb aka the family you choose is stronger than the family you were born into. If you’re a minor who came out please stay safe I know from my own experience and my brothers how dangerous and scary it can be but you are so much stronger than you know! We believe in you!

The axe forgets, the tree remembers

Discreetly put some headphones on her when she’s in a deep sleep. Then. Play the most loud ear splitting sound known to man kind. Then when she goes to get it checked out. Say that you had no idea that would do that to her. Because what goes around comes around one million fold. I have sensitive everything. So I understand not being comfortable with noise. But a normal responsible adult would immediately get their kids out of there if they are even the least bit uncomfortable. I hope that doctor rips her multiple new ones. You could have very well lost your hearing. You can tell this hits pretty close to home for me.

Also that top part of my comment is not to be taken seriously. She may have almost caused you hearing damage. But turning around and doing it to her worse is not right. I have a better idea. Tell the entire extended family. And ask them to never let her live it down. Make sure she knows that she could have hurt you for years. Even if you moved out. Keep reminding her that she hurt you. And watch the fun begin.

@@shadowking278 thank you for your comment

I really want to know what makes a baby an alpha according to them 😂🤔

​@@areswalker5647 perhaps they were born in Gen Alpha 🥁 badum tss

@@areswalker5647 people in these comments just jealous that their kids aren’t making 6 digits every year, have 3 sources of passive income, and got all of the 2 year old hoes. L behavior fr fr /s

Same energy as "Boss Baby"

Hello dad, I'm "not your kid anymore", nice to meet you!

You Are Valid. Your "father" is not. He doesn't deserve you in his life. You have every right to cut contact with him. So say I, your Internet Uncle Gay!

@@John_Weiss Internet Uncle Gay you are now one of my favourite people

@@hawkshalo Glad to be of help!

I feel like I will probably have to go through this two fold. And for the Same reason as her. I’m gay and a trans female. And both my parents are against the LGBTQ community. I’ve had too many close calls with them figuring out that I’m apart of the LGBTQ community. That’s what I got for being adopted by people who were raised in the 50s. 😔

@@shadowking278 I, your Internet Uncle Gay, urge you to Keep Yourself Secret, and Keep Yourself Safe. Lie if you have to. If your parents suspect anything or ask anything, Lie through your teeth. Meanwhile, plan your escape. Plan for the future when you can be your True You. Keep it secret. Keep it safe. More importantly, make the plans _realistic._ Steps you can actually work towards. Use this to give yourself hope. But again, _hide it._ I wish you well. You. Are. Valid.

I have great respect for you mother. She came out of that terrible situation and was able to overcome it and not repeat the behavior, and that's a lot harder than it seems.

I hope that you and your brother made/make it clear to that horrible woman that she is no grandmother to either of you and you want nothing to do with her ever again. I cannot stand people like that.

Me: “oh? You were bad mouthing my mom. Well have fun dying alone in a nursing home where nobody will put up with you. You sub-level version of an empty shell.”

I have an extra layer of “being a horrible person is not genetic.” Because I’m adopted by two anti LGBTQ people. The only difference between the two is that my dad actually accepts that Covid is apart of our lives and will happily get vaccinated.

Omg seriously! That was absolutely INSANE.

It's incredibly hard, and I always question whether or not I'm doing the right thing. But there is so much to be gained from taking that step. I don't know your family, but generally the rule is that if people are going to back an abuser you don't need them in your life either. Those same people will belittle you themselves in similar situations if only given the opportunity. If they don't have your back in something as serious as this, then they never truly will about other things. And you don't deserve having to go through life fearing people who don't care about you, even if they are family. Think of it this way: if you had friends around you saying these things to you, would you keep them around? Why should family be any different? At the end of the day, family, friend, or stranger, they are still a singular person who treats others poorly. Yes, you will probably have backlash, but as soon as people take sides or don't care enough to bother you then know who you can actually trust within your family (or friends) with the small problems and the big ones. It's heartbreaking to find out who these people might be that you're close to, but when you do you can finally move on to only better people who will care about you. There are a couple simple steps to get you started. Moving is one of them, even if it's just to somewhere else in your town/city and don't give out your address. The relief of knowing no one you're scared of can find you is liberating. No one can show up at your door unexpectedly and threaten you if they don't know where you are. Blocking numbers is another (or changing it altogether but that takes work depending on where you live). Then you'll stop reading the hate sent your way and get some distance to clear your head. When no one is tearing you down day after day the difference is substantial. And you're not missing anything: you already know what these people think about you and what they're going to say. It's not a guess anymore. And third, connecting with the rest of the people you love in other ways. Unfortunately everyone you know is going to find out about your hard decisions if you decide to go ahead with it. Either your father and extended family abusers there are going to complain to everyone who has ears that they are totally not bad people, or they'll pretend nothing is wrong or different at all and you're have a get out of jail free card on the backlash. As for connecting with the people who still love you after finding out, it'll be as simple as "Will my father be there at this christmas gathering? Oh I'd prefer to avoid him, so I'll just visit you at x time instead to make sure to see you during the holidays". The people that have your back will understand, and are typically thankful for being out of the crossfire themselves given the option. Of course all of this might sound straightforward and I'm not going to pretend it's as simple as 1-2-3. But I do promise, just like Click says all the time, that it does get easier eventually. My parents bred into me that same phobia. It's horrible, soul crushing, terrifying, and any other word you can think of. Not that you don't already know of course. And that's why I can assure you that there is hope. There has been a lot of times over the last few years where I squeak out something embarrassing and receive a neutral response, and I follow it up going "wait a minute, this thing about me or this thing that I think doesn't bother you?" I don't think I can describe that feeling, but this is a hard root to tear out. It can be overcome and you can live as you truly wish you could without being paralyzed over what this thing might look like to someone else. If you do decide to do this, know that there is a big, invisible community of strangers who are behind you and wish you all the luck in the world.

I would say that you should slowly slowly eliminate contact with them. Slow enough that they don't clue in right away. Make excuses for why you can't take time off to see them, why you can't go for holidays, etc. This becomes a really good option once you have in-laws [and your in-laws are decent people], because then you have an excuse to use.

Cut it. They aren’t your family if they let the abuse happen. You don’t need abusers validation all you need is yourself

I read the BREAKING NEWS!!!!!! like the live action fish from SpongeBob

Im sorry you lost your heart/like after the edit, here you can take this one: ❤!

You can take mine too:❤

And this one :❤

Yayy, you got more hearts!! Good job people!

I know this is 2 months later, but your parents are just generally bad people, there is definitely something bad going on and they just BRUSH IT OFF? Wtf is wrong with them? Seek help if possible, get a checkup, you gotta get that checked.

Yeah she's really projecting, nobody worships climate change, but everything is about religion to her because she's religious. She doesn't worship conspiracy theories but she believes in them.

*toriel flashbacks

Thank you.

Can i be the gay cousin of this fictional family??

The internet has a lot of negativity to answer for, for sure, but then I see super-wholesome & empathetic threads like the ones in this comments section and it really does restore some faith? So glad people who've survived/are still going through this kind of trauma are able to find supportive community here, and have their amazing strength in just getting through it all validated & reinforced! 💞 Hope all Hage or will find loving families of choice, partners, colleagues or whomever, that can encourage them on that ongoing journey.

I'm sorry for you

You can’t quit I’m grounding you!