"Regretful Parents" Are Going VIRAL. Here's What I Think 

Seems you were more mature at 17 than many people are at twice that age. Good for you!

Very well done!

@chernagast6754 Agree to everything you said and as a preschool teacher I realiza training, teaching and discipline is important. It's how you do it and when that's important and of course, consistency. Children are a blessing.

You are meant to be a mom!! ❤❤❤

Wow you where a better parent as a child than most parents are in general.

Thank God you're here. I am glad you are. You survived for a purpose. You might not know it yet, but I am sure there is a very good one! Be encouraged. You're in my prayers. Much love. ❤

It’s horrible. Sorry you went through that

I'm assuming she still raised you. If she felt so bothered by it she could have put you up for adoption. But she didn't. I know its terrible to hear something like that. She should have never said something so cruel. You can't change the past. However at this point. Do better than your mother.

You being alive isn’t a mistake. Your mother saying all that was a mistake. Don’t let her character problem determine your worth.

You are here for a reason. Praying you find peace. This planet needs you. Please stay strong and keep fighting.

SO TRUE!

Agree!

Add nihilism to that as well

Yes, this very much applies to the parents and the kids

They call it "self love" which is the exact same as narcissism.

Totally true. Probably the most clever comment here instead of crying on social medias and narcissism as usual which doesn't bring anything new to the discussion

in a way but not really, most communities these days do not provide the adequate resources for lower or middle income families but it's a stretch to assign these roadblocks as a cause for regretting having kids.

Agreed, this is a cultural problem

Absolutely 💯 true. We must bring back the extended family. Its extremly hard with the current isolated state of stay at home moms. Even working moms. Even in the previous generation in which the job of motherhood was respected, it was still hard. We need family around us to help and give us a break to breathe and be the best for our families. This is also partly learned behavior. Not all but many would be. My grandmother told my mother who's 1 of 7 kids that every pregnancy felt like another 18 yr prison sentence. Needless to say my mom grew up in a very orderly yet very abusive home. Like stuff u see in movies abusive. There was no mutiny going on. It was just the misery my grandmother was married to. Through all that crap my mom never hated my brother and I. She overcame. Not perfect but still a great mom. The final note yet most important point...I used to feel grinded down by tasks and park play with my first. I wasn't saved back then tho. 14 yrs later when I had my 2nd son I came back to faith. I know it might sound cheesy but cooking, cleaning and just being privileged to sit down in safety and eat with my family is the best part of my days. That former grinding feeling is gone. Praise Yah! It's replaced with peace and a stified and fulfilling tiredness after a day of work. ❤ It's not enough to pretend, these parents deserve to feel the joy they're missing. Only YHVH can bring that back to them.

​@@TAFKAsLesty that's because in antinatalist Western nations we've spent generations dismantling the social structures, such as living with extended family, entire neighborhoods communally watching out for kids, etc, that previously helped

I was just thinking that, perhaps it’s absolutely because the child knows and feels that you don’t love them.

My exact thought. She can feel her mother's negative energy towards her.

Possible

Yep

These people are so self centered that they don't think of what they are doing to the children. They don't think of the debt they owe to the world, that they can only repay by paying it forward.

My 6 year old daughter is the exact same way. She is amazing. My husband and I adore her, my mom says “she’s not normal.” But we put a lot into making her that way. One night, when she was with a babysitter, she whispered to her, “guess what, I was wanted by my mommy and daddy.” My husband and I always tell her that we’re so lucky to have her. That we always wanted a little girl who is as smart and kind as her. Now, we’re pregnant with my son, and we plan to do the exact same thing.

And thought they are days where the same mom and child have a full range tantrum middle of the mall.. motherhood can be so .

This is not hard, give love and you will receive love. Thoroughly enjoyed parenting, and now Grandparenting.

That brought tears to my eyes. This is the beauty we miss when we focus on the crap of the world. Yeah, we have to acknowledge it to combat it - However, we should never miss the forest for the trees.

My sons are just like this 😭 they are 11 and 13 and have promised they'll never be embarrassed of my xoxo's 😂 praying these sweet boys never change. ❤ Your comment just made my day.

You didn't realize your mom had endured the most while she was the only one raising you?

@@AlwaysFallingFromTheRight... I was an adult when we had that conversation. Also my father left us when I was much older.

aww God bless your mom, she sounds amazing, I too would do it all again, life is hard at times but so what love it the ultimate gift of life, I feel sorry for these people hating their children or anyone

@@rachaelleann9847 she is. she's not perfect but she did her best. I honestly don't feel sorry for people who hate their children.

Same here. Dad bailed to party instead. Had no interest in his son, me. Complete mess for many years while my mom persisted in never giving up on me. Now married with my own and she couldn't be happier. Some moms, to the lucky of us, are just heros who don't want anything in return. I owe everything I have and am to her, and her alone

Who is supposed to be the community?

@@user-ws2fj6ie9u typically family and friends

@@user-ws2fj6ie9u grandparents, other family members who can sometimes give you a hand.

Same here , I love my children .. I can’t imagine life without them and I love them more than anything in this world . They are the reason I keep going but I wish I had my village like my parents did sometimes when I am at my breaking point stress wise which isn’t their fault but me overwhelming myself because I want to be a perfect parent even though that doesn’t exist . I wouldn’t say these awful things about my babies

@@heatherwarner2603exactly, I’m almost the same situation… LOVE my daughter to death but me and her dad need a village like my parents had. My grandma was basically a free full time nanny for my mom and my mother gives her no credit and says she raised us on her own. Not saying I need a nanny but more support would make a world of difference. 😢

That's why I don't have kids. I'm aware of how tortuous they can be for over 20 years. Nope. No thanks 🤯

Cats I almost always like though 😂

Worse I think.

It’s narcissism, pure and simple. These people treat their kids as if they’re extensions of themselves instead of what they can be (future adults) and treated as such. If these people would stop thinking of themselves for once, perhaps they’d have a shot at decent family instead of bitching about it on Reddit.

Never an ounce of personal accountability with people like this

That is 100 percent true. Nobody can change my opinion on that. I've lived long enough to see the difference of it not being around and of it being around. I've been saying that for years.

Social media is cancer

You are 100% correct! Amen to that!!

"That's why I don't want kids" - the people who post these photos

Yo why won't those people just travel with their kids? I was 6 months old the first time I flew because my parents made that a priority in their kids' lives. They took us to some really fun places just about every year Doubt it was convenient or easy for them or anybody sitting near them on a plane but I am extremely grateful for it

They're too immature to blame it on their own actions, they chose to do the deed yet blame it on you, they're beyond stupid

Incredibly wicked people out there

I'm so sorry to hear that. You're a precious human being and deserve to be treated as such.

I completely understand!

Yeah...nobody forced your dad's eggplant into your mom. They need to blame themselves

Why do you have children if you are struggling financially?

@@BetabelL-mh1xw because I broke my leg and couldn’t work. We can afford children and we planned for them. But things happen that are unfortunately going to pop up in life and challenge us. We faced it together and are better off now. It’s just life.

If anything, these bad parents are taking everything away from them

Their children are the victims.

and yet people who choose to opt out are bullied by society daily for it, so nto exactly their choice if they get pestered to have kids daily like all people get

She has new knowledge now and has changed her mind. People can do that. Shaming her or shouting her down won't change her mind again.

That's why they regret "bringing them into this world"?

My wife had it when we had our first child and can definitely recognize it in some of these cases. The thing is, she needed a lot of support from me and “cleaning up” thoughts to get back on track. Maybe they dont have a supportive spouse or worse they are single mothers. Sucks for everyone involved, specially the child.

❤

ppd is the worst 🥺 I'm glad you're doing better!

I was wondering too if some of these women were suffering from post partum depression and maybe didn’t have any type of support system. I am happy to hear that you made it thru your ppd and that you and your family are doing better now. 💜

my wife also struggled a bit with that in her 2nd birth it is hormones and I was extra affectionate to her during it which seemed to help, and I was thrilled to feed our second girl for her first few milkshakes 😂

Yea

True. But a lot of those would be doing it mostly just to get back at their ex.

Only because they know it would hurt there ex. They are pure evil.

Child support is a hell of a drug

@@shigermuleye5203 but its true

I’m sure that woman said something to that poor baby and now that kid is scared of her.

Kid's are very sensitive. They pick up vibes and can't express how they feel so it lingers into adulthood.

You can’t fake it with a child.

Exactly. Know what can cause selective mutism? Trauma. Poor little girl may have even gone through something this parent doesn't even know about.

Oh she most definitely has noticed. I was that little girl with a mother who hated her, when I was young. She never said I love you, never hugged or comforted me. I knew she hated me. It really messed me up for awhile. I was determined not to have kids because I was so messed up from her and I was scared I'd do the same to my own children. Well my first son was a surprise pregnancy and my life absolutely changed. I felt such intense instant love for him and would do anything to protect him, nurture him, comfort him. Any parent that is too narcissistic to be a good parent or too selfish to offer love to a little human being should have their child(ren) taken away. Or never have children in the first place. There's so many people that could give, and want to give, a loving home to children through adoption.

❤❤❤❤❤

And the football player who said the exact same thing… was blasted by the media and the Leftist…

Exactly. We've been blinded by materialism and ego. No "success" can compare with turning love into a family and raising a person.

"For the world" --people don't exist solely for the benefit of the world. Just as the world owes us all nothing, we owe the world nothing.

Amen, I hope you homeschool or are considering it. I was looking forward to continuing nursing and getting my clinical psychology degree when we discovered abuse in public preschool and were entering another shady school for kindergarten. We started with a charter school which was not ideal, but it was abridge for my confidence to fully homeschool. We started out in poverty and are just getting by now. But it's worth it to us. I never wanted kids, didn't know how to raise a little one at all, we were super alone. But we are grateful everyday for our children and wish we could justify having more (if not for financial and health issues, so we are extremely careful, I learned how to track my cycle of ovulation, crazy even most nurses don't know how to do this to avoid pregnancy). My husband and I are very different people from when we started out together. Thanks to the Lord, as we accepted salvation when our eldest was about five, but also thanks to this path being parents together.

I completely agree. Anytime I do something that I never wanted to do, it usually does not work out very well. That's why it's best for people to not have kids if they really don't want them.

When I heard of the Mat Walshes, I often say "Ask Casey Anthony" and "Ask Communist Romania."

No, they're selfish. I mean I don't want them having kids either, but if they do, they need to grow up. They are purely selfish people who, when faced with helpless babies who just wanted their love, chose to remain overgrown children instead of giving themselves to the actual children in front of them.

@@tc5922he’s referring to how Matt calls anyone who doesn’t want kid a selfish and terrible person who should definitely have kids And then is shocked by the outcome of the people who don’t want kids having kids. Obviously if they have kids they should suck it up and take care of their kids and love them. But also stop pushing people who don’t want kids to have kids

by the time i was a young teen i had enough self awareness to know that i never wanted to get married or have children . i would have been a horrible father and husband. but i do understand that the family unit is the backbone of our society and i encourage everyone who has the temperament for it to do so.

You hit the nail on the head 💯

Exactly! I was 23 when I had my first child and me and my hubby both worked but he contributed equally if not more because at the time I made more. We both made sure the other got sleep, time alone for a bit, and other things…. Never regretted it even though I was so young

Virtually everyone both related to me and people that I know and their relatives all have relatively quiet children and orderly lives. I think that these people may just be genetically defective, and probably should not have had children.

I have two teens and a surprise 10 month old. My teens told me that there is a Tik Tok trend where parents scare their babies on purpose, and they think it's hilarious. They were horrified by this because whenever their baby brother gets scared by something they drop what they're doing and rush to his side. Seeing an innocent little baby get scared isn't funny, it's the most horrible thing ever, and these psychos are doing it on purpose, to their own babies. To farm likes. I hate this planet.

I'm glad you also brought up pets alongside children because I've been noticing a great amount of increase for animal/pet hatred, especially in relation to dogs but I've also been seeing a growing hatred for cats as well. While animals and children should never be compared to one another, there are a few things that can be applied to both beings. Things like neglect, regretfulnes, bitterness, etc. can be felt by both pets and children which will lead to them developing certain unhealthy behaviors that can potentially snowball into depression and/or violent tendencies. As Jordan Peterson would put it, "Don't let your children do anything that makes you dislike them." This information can pass over to pets like dogs and cats as well because, just like children, they can be taught how to behave properly around both you and strangers. Too many people these days are too selfish and/or immature to know how to properly raise their children and/or pets which is why we're seeing a major increase in both child hatred and animal hatred. Every child deserves a parent but not every parent deserves a child.

@@anwylhsm954 Whilst I love a good prank, that's horrible. You aren't supposed to terrorize your children. You are supposed to teach them. Don't hate the planet. Or, the people. I'm as baffled by the behavior by some on social media as well, but, all we can do is be the best person we can be and live by example. You can only impact those within your sphere of influence. Don't let those outside of it change who you are.

Then stop bullying child free people

The kid speaks to her, as she is an immediate family. So I do not think so. The mother even mentions she does her best to treat her daughter well.

That is absolutely correct! Very sad. Very true.

My daughter went through selective mutism for a while but outgrew it. She was later diagnosed with autism. I have zero regrets about having my children but these things do happen.

​@lubystkaolamonola529 I don't believe for a moment she treats her well. Anyone who is evil enough to speak about their child that way, I can garentee they don't treat them well.

@@lubystkaolamonola529 "I hate her but treat her well" Yeah, seems legit.

Same!

I was expecting more of these kind of comments… these poor people are brainwashed by the No Children Government policies and indoctrination in schools.. they actually believe that the Government will take care of them in their old age instead of their children… destroying the family is at the top of the list of the Leftist…

amen to that

You're talking to the wrong people. In the last few minutes of the video Matt explained it perfectly. These people are mentally ill, and they're just looking for confirmation that theres nothing wrong with them, but everything wrong with the world.

I’m sure it wasn’t an overnight thing. You noticed opinions stated by your kids that didn’t align with your values and you failed to address them or look into them. I think you have to be more radical in your beliefs today because so many parents have failed to parent.

We do things together, cook, clean, play chess, shop, read, travel, we build, we solve problems, math or live - we do everything together. You lead the by example and by doing so you become a better human, because you need to be the best example for your kids.

You're not a parent, are you? 😂

Not possible, dumb455

@@ananse77 Jordan Peterson is a parent. Nuff said.

@@ananse77 You know, she doesn't has to be a parent to quote peterson 😂

This is actually great advice. 💕

I'm sorry 😞. I heard losing a child is the worst kind of pain.

Poor man

💐❤️

I am so sorry. I pray that God blesses me with leaving this earth before my children.

You're a great Dad. The unfortunate truth is, life is suffering for us all. As soon as we can accept it, we can start to cherish the things we do have. Heaven and Hell is real, and it's on earth. We all get to choose where we want to be... however, sometimes we don't, and we find ourselves in hell. But Heaven is out there, it always will be. Sounds like optimism, but it's the truth. Jordan Peterson can articulate it much better than I can.

You did an amazing job 👏

@@bigtalk2598 I'm touched and so thankful for your success story, and glad to know there's good parents out there still. You should be giving Ted Talks, or at least mentoring some young people.

Its not the best thing that will ever happen to some people, as you can see the video talks about parents being regretful. Blessing from god? No no no and no. If god is real, why would this be his blessing? Especially how some people DONT EVEN like the blessing.

@@doofuscawtit is a blessing, these people he is talking about are probably touched by satan if I had to guess.

​@doofuscawt yes they are. The mental dysfunction of selfish and hateful parents have no reflection on children and how precious they are and what gifts they are. All of this only reflects on these people who decided to bring another life into the world with apparently zero thought about what it is to raise a human being and then go onto social media and publicly announce the hatred for their children. Its disgusting. Don't have kids if you'rea terrible person. Simple.

I've never seen an adoptee that actually loves, or even likes their adoptive parents.

@@ShellShock11Csame. I've never met parents who only had one child who doesn't have major contempt for their one only child. Parents with only 1 have very unreasonable unrealistic expectations of the one child that never lived up to their unreasonable expectations.

People forcing women to give birth are the ones to blame. Don’t want kids to end up with parents that resent them ? Then don’t limit abortion , plan B and birth control. As long as you vote for forced birth , YOU are to blame and YOU are evil.

It is sick. There is something truly wrong with ppl today.

Sadly this is most boomers

​@EgoBrain1 mental health awareness is a tool used by Tyrants.

@@EgoBrain1 Today?!?! This describes my mom, and I'm oooooold. This isn't anything new.

I would just say you have 5 pence instead of a nickel hyuck hyuck. (what do they call a 5 pence coin in the U.K though?)

It would be worthless here too bc it costs so much to just eat n keep a roof over your head that you may as well just use the nickels as gravel

@@tabbiragan915 Same here. Even if it was British money, our PM Communist Keir would steal- I mean, tax it all and give it to welfare scroungers who have no intention to go out to work. Or throw it at Ukraine.

@@kylem1112 We just call it a 5p coin, or a 5 pence piece. It doesn't have a sexy name sadly.

But thats what you get in a pronatalist society. Its pronatalists that at one point in time encouraged those parents in the video to have kids. There was no antinatalist wisdom and risk assessment to encourage otherwise. NOW those children are left with parents that don't want them, which is going to lead to trauma.

THIS!!

The question is where is daddy. I think lot of these cases are worst because father and grandparents are missing too. I am father and i think many men don’t do enough.

@@nacpatil But how much can many men do that have to work all day to provide for their family monetarily? When you get home in the evening from a stressful workday, it is not so easy to muster the energy to take the work off from mommy and to play with the kids. Not as it should be, no doubt, but its difficult

@@martinfiedler4317I didn’t want to work outside the home after having children, but I had to. Playing with them at the end of a stressful day was what I looked forward to and the most rewarding thing I did all day. It’s not that hard.

@@midwesternviolet8768 That's a blessing and reflects what Matt describes as the choice on perception. It's not always that easy to do, but definitively worth aspiring.

NICE... TELL THAT TO GOD. THERE'S ALWAYS A REASON THAT CAN DISMISS RESPONSIBILITY *ESPECIALLY* FOR MOTHER'S.

Those who are without sin may cast the first stone. I'm glad you are a perfect human without flaws or hormonal imbalances, congrats. And you don't tell God anything. He already knows....

Hormones don't produce selfishness, that is your thought process. And NO, it does NOT go on for years, your f**kn whining does. Get out and do something consistently, maybe exercise to help get rid of those EXTRA pregnancy pounds you put on from comfort food may make you feel better about yourself.

@@nicoleduff6645 Folks need a boost up NOT extra dirt on their self inflicted grave

Yes but that is not these case with these subreddit people. They are just selfish.

❤❤❤

We must just do what is necessary, which includes ignoring the genetically defective. The internet gives them a voice.

That's awesome man.

God bless you 💗 I too feel my kids are the best and most important part of my life.

Same, dude. Same.

Same. Seeing my friends with little kids makes me tired lol

I agree that not everyone needs to have kids, but if you ever find yourself with kids, for whatever reason, remember it is a choice to be happy.

I regret it , but choose to pretend to be happy for the sake of my child - fake it til you make it

Being a mom isn’t about happiness. At least not for me I’m in Christ and they’re gifts and God entrusted me to raise them up in His ways not mine. The love Christ towards me is my strength to love them and im so grateful!❤

Amen.

Maybe there should have been legal options for them not to be born into pain...let's think think think...

​@smokyquartz5817 Or parents could get over themselves and DECIDE to love their children.

​@@smokyquartz5817condoms are widely available at all retail outlets 😊

In my experience the online mother's groups are toxic.

This 🙌

Yes, women used to drown their children if unable to care for them in the past. People sold their children too. This is not a new concept it’s just that it is now being discussed openly.

@@tc2011fulya there’s always been bad people that become parents

Then don't have sex. Simple fix. Don't want children?? Don't have sex. If you want to be married, then get a vasectomy and a hysterectomy. "Easy" (not easy at all I'm aware) fix.

Yea I think the worse part today is the validation these people are getting...

Some people are born to be mothers and thrive

Awe!❤

There were times I loved being a mother and times not so much, like everything else in life. I would do it all over again.

Bad parents have been around for a long , long time. They just have a reddit now

@@MikeBarbarossa Yep. And all of the other social platforms. I used to think that it was rare for people to hate their kids because I only knew people in person that had dealt with that. But now with social media being around, it's like a trend for people to hate their kids. Sad world that we live in.

Yet when people say they prefer to be childfree, you are the first people to scream and judge. Shut your mouth from now on!!! Not everyone wants kids. ACCEPT IT.

​@@vickieclark5931 "it's a trend"... and " It's sad world" don't you have wrong perspective there? People always hated thier kids and you just choose to be sad about it with zero impacts outside of your mental health In other words, why be sad over normal stuff?

​@@anniesok868 then tell them to stop having sex If they don't want babies don't do the things that make babies.

Matt Walsh be hypocritical as eff

Sorry you feel bullied by people pushing a pro-family message, if you would make for a lousy parent, you probably suffer from selfishness or are just inept as a person. Whatever the case, stop playing victim.

Many of the people who post on this (huge) subreddit are fathers.

I agree. Some of what these people wrote is reminiscent of intrusive thoughts one can experience with PPD/PPA. It’s a VERY dark place to be in.

This was my first thought as well. These parents need to see a professional. Either that or they are just selfish.

Agreed. We have so much more knowledge about hormonal imbalances; surely there should be more awareness about PPD?

Exactly this!!!! I doubt majority of women who have sacrifice so much pain and time growing these babies and birthing them hate them. I think they’re crying out for help… and this is really heartbreaking, and the response in these comment sections is truly disgusting when you’re dealing with parents who are genuinely struggling

I love this story, I think it could also shed light on the sufferings of some of these parents. I hear a lot of people who do well with parenting and look like they have it together is because they have help, which makes sense.

I'm so glad you found the help you needed. Parenting can be incredibly tough and with sleep deprivation it becomes so hard to think and our emotions can get more pessimistic and difficult. Wishing you and your kids all the best. You sound like a great mother.

Where’s your husband???? That’s what happens when you DONT use protection! 🙄🙄🙄 #consequences

I know when you're in the middle of hard things you feel like it's not normal or it's extreme compared to everyone else's experience but you're describing typical life with a newborn. That does not minimize the struggle or make what you felt any less real. It does show that you didn't have the support you should have had. From physicians to family & friends...doctors need to prepare new mom's for what they will experience. Family & friends need to be there physically to help out. But it's become such a dilemma. In the past where family & friends came in to help ...they came whether they were asked to come or not. Now, everyone is so afraid to do or say the wrong thing. Young parents choose to isolate themselves on purpose, telling family not to come for sometimes weeks or months after a birth. Or families are not helpful even when new parents want help.

It is so difficult, even with easier babies. Let’s hope that things get smoother for you. I was 37 when I had my first. My mother had passed 18 months before, my husband’s parent’s were extremely abusive so they aren’t allowed to be involved, and that left my father. Even my best friends abandoned me. It’s so difficult trying to find out own way, when we have no clue what we’re supposed to do❤ But you seem to have found your way (with the perfect light to lead you).

This!! 🙌🏼🙌🏼 you took the words right out of my mouth ❤.

Screaming and fighting is no way for a child to behave, and yelling is not required on your part. You have the love part down, and that is good. Now is the time for your 3 and 1 year old to learn that your rules about civilized behavor are non-negotiable. It will be far harder for you to get the 7 year old trained, as he has learned that you will tolerate his misbehavior. A child who knows where the line is is a happy child, because there is no need for him to fear if he stays on the right side of it.

@@yasminbagley909 ❤️

@@darthnatas953 I am sorry you made so many assumptions based on one comment. I am not sure why you would believe my children are not civilized if you do not know them or me. My children are very respectful and well-behaved; they are not dogs, so they do not need to be trained; they are children; they speak loudly when they get excited and fight at times because, again, they are children; and if I yell out of frustration, it shows my children that I am human, and it then gives me an opportunity to teach them and model the appropriate behavior and take the steps to make it right, and for you to say that my 7-year-old has learned that I will tolerate his misbehavior, is laughable because again you don't know us If you did, you would be among the many people complimenting me on how respectful and well-behaved my children are.

Your opening sentences is about the poor behavior of your 3 children. You must course correct, this is not normal behavior to physical assault and scream. Explore Non Violent Communication. Don't get defensive, please be calm and gentle. There is a free download able lbook

Yes, that or society actually has to make a decent argument.

Agreed. It's not for everyone and that should be okay.

The problem isn’t the pressure to have kids, it’s the well funded narratives which try to convince the gullible, “useless eaters” to not have children. Not having children is how you destroy a country, a race, a future. Having children is how you preserve it. It’s how you fully mature and become an actual adult.

I’ve never felt pressured to have children lol

I think some people have unrealistic expectations and are not prepared. They were not around children or helped raise them to understand what raising them is really like

Maybe. But I know of many whose children are just a burden forever (e.g. drug addicts; have mental disorders; can't support themselves). And often children have disabilities that means that you're stuck with that for the rest of your life. It used to be that people would say that it'll be your children who'll take care of you when you're old but that doesn't happen as often now.

@@TaylorRaine while that may be part of the truth, there is something darker here. I have a 4 year old and a 1 year old and even though they throw tantrums, I don't ever regret having them, nor do I feel like I'm lying to them when I hold them and say "I love you!" I cry if I accidentally hurt them, or if I feel I didn't do enough for them. I don't miss not having kids ever, and I struggle with depression and anxiety hard, ever since I was a teenager, because my own mother did not want or love me and the pain from that came to a head during puberty

⁠​⁠@@user-cc7uf9go2wpeople need to understand going on that there is never a guarantee of a “perfect child.” Your child may be born with disabilities. Or they may have an accident as a teen that means they will have to rely on you forever. But that’s life. No guarantees.

@@user-cc7uf9go2w I have a disability, and this is exactly the reason why my mom abandoned me as soon as I started to show signs in my toddler years. It's why I was abused by my dad and the rest of my family, and why to this day I still struggle with suicidal thoughts and self worth. Now these are all things I'm continuing to work on, and I'm fortunate to have a husband who loves me far far more than my own parents ever could. It still messes me up to think that because I was born with something I never wanted to have, that I had to face all that abuse. So to sit there and say children with disabilities are "burdens" is disgusting and means u probably shouldn't be a parent. I mean that in the general sense, to anyone who can call a child a burden, for being born with something that was obviously out of their control. If, at any point, someone thinks to themselves "gosh. I hope none of my kids have disabilities. That would ruin my life", they should just get fixed right then and there. Their love is conditional at best

I see a lot of these people forgetting about these posts until years later when their kids find them, and then we'll get a whole new round of regret posts.

Yes, that woman who said she hates her kids aged 1 and 3 could have postpartum depression....this can develop right after birth or even later on ....not an expert but could be...

To be fair, in the past raising children would be a job for a whole - traditional - family. Meaning that especially the grandparents were around to help out, physically and with their experience. Modern society had destroyed that, parents are left alone and for many that is just too much.

And a whuppin

They needed abortions

@@martinfiedler4317 EXACTLY!

I too was the perfect parent, until I became one. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE my son, btw ❤️

Yea but if it weren’t for his 60 hours I would not have the privilege to raise them full time. I’m sure plenty of moms are excelling in working but to me it’s worth the “burden” when in reality Jesus is the only One helping me in more ways than my husband and myself combined!

I have always found it amusing how moms lap up that 60 hours of a Dad's money, then evidently find raising their own children to be miserable, all to be condescending towards the Dad spending his day off with the kids. As for the good leader part it's definitely a help to you, because if he wasn't a good leader he would have been fed up with you and gotten rid of you instead of keeping your whining self for the sake of the children.

👏🏼

This!

So true! I chose not to have kids by my mid teens ( 63 now ) as I didn't want the responsibility or expense and was responsible enough not to have an "oops!" However I applaud those who are responsible loving parents being active in their childrens lives. Broken homes can ruin a society.

100% agreed - I'm glad I don't have children. I know MW is kind of against it, but oh well!

PERIOD. Childfree till I die. I have all the attention from my partner to MYSELF

Yeah, this guy is great! Good old fashioned common sense. He also has religion.

Hard agree. I mean we all know we have those “intrusive thoughts”. Imagine we speak them out or act on them. Crazy.

You're a legend. All of these lovely people are in the world because of you. I'm so sorry you lost your son. I can't imagine what that's like. But as you know, God is with you and helping you. You're fantastic.

Amen sister and God bless you 👍👍🙏🏻✝

Currently pregnant with my ninth baby and your testimony to the beauty of a large family is such an encouragement. I pray I will get to swing with grandbabies one day ❤

My 19 year old son was murdered in 2012. I struggle to exist since his death. I wish I could be more like you. There are no swings or grandchildren for me. I'm sorry about the loss of your son. God Bless You.

Don't let anyone pressure you to do something with such serious implications. I too don't like messes, stresses and things that are unpredictable which is the essence of having kids. I never remember a time I wanted kids, I didn't even like kids when I was a kid. I hated being at my friend's houses when they had little siblings running around and I always liked quiet adult company. Childen's voices make me crazy and they are always doing something stupid. They are noisy, smelly and annoying. There is literally nothing I like about them. I just turned 60 and have never, for one second, regretted my decision to be childfree. I was a real weirdo back in the day and was constantly told I'd change my mind but I knew I never would. The thought of having a baby made my skin crawl and no one understood that. I was lucky enough to find a spouse that didn't want kids either (although he didn't actively dislike them as I do) and we just had our 40th anniversary. We have a great life in a beautiful home, have plenty of money and never had kids interfere with our careers. Getting ready to retire and do some travelling. Children are not necessary to have a fulfilling life and don't let anyone bully you into it.

Maybe, maybe not. At first glance, anyone would say you are right and should avoid having children. On the other hand, there are some things that come into play if you have children, your entire biology changes. This happens with the first child, but even more with subsequent children. Hormones change your feelings, your interests and what you find important. So there is no telling how this would affect you, but there is a sensible possibility, that getting pregnant will transform your feelings on this subject more than you imagine. We live in a society, where we convince each other, that having children is boring and a hassle and that women are glad to get back to work. Well, there are some who are. But many more, are overwhelmed with feelings they did not know existed and don't want to leave their children, because they discover that this is exactly what nature prepared them for. The cow does not stay with its calf because the patriarchy forces her. She just follows her instinct. Try taking away a pup from its mother. Nobody told them and they did not read a book. I don't know what your life is like, but you are a mammal and a primate at that. You may discover that you are happier, when you live your life more like that what your ancestors where evolutionary prepared for.

Same here… I visit my parents about once per year, but we don’t have anything in common.

I’m gen-X as well. My mum was a SAHM, my father was in the Navy (so sea-duty sometimes had him gone for months on end). And my mother never seemed to want us around either. Now I want to be clear that my mother truly loved my brother and I, and did everything for us... but she never involved us.She was in bed when we got on the school bus, and when we got home from school we had to immediate back outside until she called us in for dinner, then it was shower, homework, and bed. She wasn’t mean, she always supported us, she did EVERYTHING (too much actually, she should have taught us to do things around the house)... but she didn’t want us around. She died unexpectedly when I was 35, and only after that did I meet my husband and have my two children. My boys are little still, and they can drive me crazy, but I’m also beyond in love with them. I happily left my career, and I even homeschool them. The topic of this video actually makes my stomach turn. And I pray to God that my sons always want a close relationship with me when they are grown men.

Same. Gen X with Boomer parents. Dealing with this right now. They have the relationship they created with me.

@@katiejon17 I just don't get it. Also Gen-X, my mom was involved in our lives, though. She'd come to our classrooms and teach the kids to make cheesecloth ghosts on Halloween or applesauce cinnamon ornaments on Christmas. I had a wonderful mom. And I also homeschool, too. I have two teens who are literally always around. I have to try to force them out the door to go make friends but they'd rather hang out with us and, honestly, I don't like other people much, either, and I'd rather hang out with them. And I also have an accidental 10 month old so I'm starting all over again - right when my husband and I were shopping for RVs, lol. But I don't regret it in the slightest. I put all of my own interests aside because they were time consuming and I didn't want to waste my kids' childhoods on myself because it goes by so fast. I always said, "I'll have more time than I know what to do with when they move out". Well, that's not the case anymore, of course, because now I have another 18+ years that I don't want to waste on myself. And, again, I don't regret that at all, even though it means I'll probably never pursue my own things. So I don't understand people who regret their kids and especially the ones who say they don't even love them or like them. My 15 year old son is my favorite person in the world to go do anything with because we're the adventurers. My 18 year old daughter is my favorite person to talk about "weird shit" with. The only thing I can guess is that these people actually hate THEMSELVES and maybe they see themselves reflected in their kids, and that's what they can't stand. Nothing else makes sense to me. Their wiring is just wrong.

I'm GenX. My parents were good parents. Not hovering, not neglectful. A good mixture of strict and allowing leeway. My mother died when I was 15. I was devastated. I got closer to my Dad after that. He died when I was 35. I dream about him every so often.

Totally agree.

Exactly right. The time to discipline them is the first time they test you, not the 50th time. This is usually about the time they start walking.

Don’t make excuses PPT doesn’t last 5 years.

They need their kids REMOVED and adopted by people able to love.

@@nhmooytis7058 Not sure you're correct about that.

As much as I disagree with what these parents were saying, one of my first thoughts was about how much parents are overworking (yet not seeing a growth in income) these days, and how much this has depleted family time.

@@Musicienne-DAB1995 this is not new, some people always worked hard- long hours, 2 jobs-to support their kids. My divorced cousin worked THREE in the Sixties to raise her 3 kids. But what’s new is Millennials whining if they can’t have everything handed to them while they sit on their arses playing on their phones. Don’t want to work, don’t want parenthood to be difficult. Life is hard, always has been...,grow up, eh?

This👆👆👆

But it's not a good thing. Maybe they need to become better people, people who can care about others?

I would add, that it isn't a matter that they should have kids anyway; if you can't or don't want to take care of them, you are doing a horrible thing. But they should think strongly about how they want their life to turn out, and maybe about fulfilling their actual purpose, or finding some other way to direct that innate desire towards the good of society.

People without children care for others. Do you think those without children have no friends, family, pets, etc that they love and care for? People like yourself who think that one can only care for their own spawn are scary. One doesn’t need children to love and care for others.

@@nyarlat2609 "They need to become better people." Yeah tell that to the drug addicted single mothers who give birth, neglect them and eventually they are in the foster care system. I don't like abortion, especially the ones who are proud of it. But this is why i can't be fully pro-life.

I always think it is interesting when a large family with younger kids is standing in a long line, and then have the audacity to complain about how many people are in front of them, causing the long wait. Think about the people waiting behind the large family feels.... Or the people who claim to hate people but then go and have kids. Kids go through stages of being terrors and hating on their parents so people who claim to hate people but still decide to have kids would be making a terrible decision.

@@matilda7773 That’s true but don’t complaint if and when you’re old and alone someday.

​@eddenz1356 having children so your not alone in old age makes you just as selfish. Walk into a nursing home and see how well that works out.

@@eddenz1356 I worked in a nursing home and most people there had kids. Guess how often those kids visited them.

​@@eddenz1356 You are so selfish

This is not what democrats can do. They are all about themselves

Sounds like they should’ve had an abortion

Having sex isn’t a decision people mull over especially when you’re married, it’s expected.

@@stacyshoemaker9177 You may not be aware, but it is possible to have sex with your spouse, and not have children, you can plan those things, you know?

@@mollkatless NAH FUCK THAT CUS I'M A PART OF RAW DOG MILITA

Or maybe they should just stop being such horrible people. If they treat their own children with such disdain, do you really think that they treat other people any better? People should have children, but they should also be good people in general. We should expect both from most adults, not just one or the other.

Absolutely! There is so much more to life than being a parent.

Exactly 👏🏼

​@@thelemurofmadagascar9183 no one obligate to have a child.

@@JeanBohanie-tj6dq Okay?? I never said people should be obligated.

They have fathers I hope. Men don't talk about their children like these women do. Our father was great. He made up for my mothers hatred of us kids...

Beautifully put it’s painfully sanctifying💯 something that’s hard to see in the midst unless you have some forms of support like a spouse church and family

​@@Stonezster If we were to generalize something, it seems to me that western parents, mothers AND fathers , tend to be pretty high in selfishness and narcissism these days...I've never met more selfish people than Americans regardless of gender....

Some fathers do. Evil doesn’t discriminate against gender. I grew up in the same Situation. Dad was avoidant and neglectful but he sure seemed like a saint next to her. Becoming a mother has been & will be the most meaningful, healing, rewarding & sanctifying experience of my life. This said, It is true that most mothers shoulder the larger portion of the parental burden (a societal issue as well as relational) men and women generally have different ways of expressing frustration. Depending on your “love language” you may have found verbal abuse more significant than another type.

Plenty of fathers on the reddit thread who also openly state they regret parenthood.

I worked an evening job when our kids were younger and I had two ways to go home.....I always took the longer round-about way.....cranked some tunes and decompressed so that when I drove in I was ready for anything they threw at me or needed.

I never got the needing time to center your self just get moving things need to be done you can relax when they are done.

@@krystelhardesty9960 If it was a difficult day at work, or a frustrating situation arose, or traffic was bad, or someone nearly hit you on the way home, or… It is important to take a deep breath or sit quietly for a time or “centre” yourself beforehand. Having that time to “refresh” is a great way to destress and focus on the activities/noise/excitement…that will greet you when entering the house.

​@@krystelhardesty9960Centering themselves prevents abusive words and acts that come out of their stress level. Lowering that stress creates a more positive interaction. It's not about 'getting things done', it's about parenting well.

​@pocho689 my kids running up to greet me erases anything that happened before.

Yep, it's beyond disgusting. Like Matt says, I can understand having moments of depression and frustration - not to this extent, but to some extent - but you put on a brave face and a big smile when you walk in the door or wake up in the morning. If you don't you're not a failure of a parent, you're a failure of humanity.

I never had children but If I had a child I would give that kid everything I possibly could when I wasn't working to raise them

I would give up so much just to have children. We can’t right now. It makes me so upset to hear people like this who are able to have kids and hate them when so many people are yearning to have children and can’t.

Same. I would do anything for mine. It makes me almost physically ill for those children whose parents see them as a burden.

Yep, my mom always said i see myself in you, you will always be my baby even if you are 50. I know she would die for me in a second and thats a beautiful kind of love. These reddit posts are disgusting and I hope the kids leave one day and never talk to their parents again

I can actually sympathize with new mothers who are frustrated with their first child and having moments of intrusive "what have I done? Did I make a mistake?" thoughts. Babies are stressful, post partum depression is real, unsupportive or absent spouses/family can take their toll on your energy. But no, a lot of these sound explicitly bitter TOWARDS the children. Like they actively hate their own children for daring to be a burden. That's messed up

You can't blame the parents they didn't sign up for this... Remember it is your side that wanted to make abortions illegal... And now you ain't happy with the outcome... it is you guys who are the selfish bitter assholes in this case...

My father in law was that way. He and his wife had 8 kids and he acted like they were the biggest burden and that they kept him from some great destiny. He was lazy and resentful and would have never put in the work for the great destiny, but I suppose the wife and kids were an easy target for his frustration. His wife constantly apologised to him that they had so many kids and that she wasn't a better wife. Ug.

So single moms. Of course.

🎯💯

Well said.

I clearly remember the time when one of my mother's sisters told me: "I say this because I think it will help you. Your mother does not like children so, it's not you, it's her."

😢

Your aunt did you a huge kindness

Yep. That proves that people do not all of a sudden want kids when they have them. Many of these parents still feel that way once their kids are grown. They were just never designed to have kids cause it was not for them. And it was wrong for them to have had kids. That's what makes people selfish. Having kids just to have them.

I often ask if the Matt Walshes will create an insurance policy on "They will love it when it gets here."

you see all what you have said is true. unfortunately, they are not being told this side of parenting. it is a long term decision. children are not objects to fit our personal and social satisfactions. they are humans that grow up to be part of society.

From what I've heard and read the first couple of years after the child is born is tough because of yelling and crying and their lack of ability to communicate and when a parent tries to travel with a child under 5yrs it won't be a trip the parents can control I had a kid around that age kicking the back of my seat in airplane once and it was really annoying.

It's a funny thing, though. Before I became a parent, I wanted to be done birthing kids by age 35 so I'd be young enough to enjoy my old life when I got it back. Raising a child turned out to be so rewarding that when my kid became an adult, I didn't want that life back!

@@indepthmike5578 Still doesn’t validate anything those “regretful parents” said. I know family’s whose children are their pride and joy. Also a kid kicking happens. There’s grown ups who kick seats on an airplane, teenagers.

​@@indepthmike5578 wait what? Kids travel across war torn countries with their parents and survive, travel the amazon and survive. My very brutal 18 month old may have gotten a couple kicks before I apologize, he would apologize, though you may not understand and then he would stop, maybe the occasional nervous tick but no you teach them what is right and wrong and small children are much smarter than we give them credit for.

They will. Deep down they'll know something is wrong, maybe it'll take them a decade or two, maybe they'll be like 30 by the time they realize that their parents were evil malignant narcissists.

@@DesertStateInEU Its not always on the parents. Sometimes the kids just start acting like little hood rats or insufferable streamers because thats what they know

If there had been internet when I was little, my parents would have posted on this forum

Indeed. It’s soo wrong to post that.

I know 😢 I feel so sad about the girl with selective mutism 😢🙏🩷

I'm betting most of the kids don't have actual special needs but the school psychologists are slapping those tables on them because the kids are acting up because their parents are so vile. As for thr ones who have actual special needs, that doesn't make it OK for their parents to speak about them like that behind their backs.

100% and that's fine it just drives me mad that matt and so many people don't understand this You wanna know why America is failing? America is failing because in so many cases the wrong people are having kids pumping them out like a factory assembly line causing generation cycle of problems

Same here, both mental and physical, it's not selfish to make the right choice

I don't rule out having children, but I am not having them now. Too many issues that need to be straightened out, including PTSD from an abusive childhood. I do not agree with either blaming children or with rushing into having children.

I think it’s natural to feel parenting is not for you during stressful times as we all have our breaking points. Also the feeling of “I’m not a good parent.”, “could I have done better?”, etc I believe is normal as well. Being a parent is scary but also amazing.

_It_ made it hard on you? _You_ made it hard on yourself.

i already know youre a male 😂😂

Agree 100%. They are clueless how to train and discipline their kids who then become brats who the parent can’t stand. Vicious cycle.

I love my 2 children and they are exceptionally well behaved. They aren't perfect. No child is. But they are far from "little monsters". These so called parents are an absolute joke.

Military parents? Oh good grief. You must be an American.

Also because military parents don't whine in general. 👍

Actually I've met plenty of military parents w out of control kids. I served under an officer who would crack down on us for even the slightest infraction, but she allowed her 5 yr old son to hit and kick her and lock himself in her office. What a joke.

Yes indeed it takes a village. I’ve seen may women went through this phase but ended up incredibly better and loving after they got the support they needed. Sometimes even the simplest thing like being able to go out for 1 hour and have the inlaws babysit. Sadly some people don’t have that and causes a terrible chain reaction of anger and resentment. But i hope they seek and find good help and support, even if it’s not from their own family.

@@Gingerrrrsnapps I don't know what village you live in, but the ones I lived in, I would never trust to raise a kids. We are in some ways seeing the results in that in the messages Matt pointed out. I wasn't the perfect parent (single parent of 2) and I didn't know how I was going to handle that when I realized my ex was not being a mother. Neglect mainly along with leaving a little girl (responsible as she may have been) to watch a 2 year old and a 3 month old for 3 hours, but didn't even get back to the apartment until 2 am the next morning. 12 hours longer than the initial 3 hours she was supposed to have been back. This isn't about blaming her, just explaining that I didn't have the option of letting that continue. That was the final, but not only straw. Yes, I was fortunate I did have family that helped (and not everybody does) pick up the kids after school until I got off work. It would have been much harder if that hadn't been the case and I had to hire someone to do it. However, my family saw that I was trying. I showed up everyday and for kids, that means the world. I felt that I screwed up in my choice of mother for them and I had to be there for them so their dad could be stable. No dating for me. My job... No, not job. My responsibility became my kids, first and foremost. I was there for the conception, that was me. I picked my ex wife, not to be a mother, but someone I could have a good time with. An unplanned pregnancy was not on my mind. That was my fault, my short shortcoming. I realized that I was right where I put myself with my choices. I say this with all seriousness, It was the best - hardest, no doubt because there were times I didn't know how I was going to get through, so yes, hardest, but the best mistake I ever made. I've said this before, my kids, are the ONLY reason I don't curse the day that I met my ex-wife. If I had picked a better partner, I would have different kids. I wouldn't trade the ones I have for an easier time, because I love the ones I have. I fought for my kids. No, I was never the perfect dad. I prayed every time my ex saw fit to pick them up for visitation. I would watch the car drive out of sight praying that they would come back with the same number of fingers, toes and eyeballs as they left with. That was a real concern and the courts can't trust the parents to tell the truth when they might just be trying to hurt the other person out of pettiness. I get that too. So, as I prayed to not lose any digits, I also prayed to be a better person and the best dad I could be. They say there are no atheists in a fox hole, when you are really worried for the well-being of a loved one, you pray for all you are worth. I certainly had to figure things out as I went, because I made mistakes, some I most definitely still regret, I couldn't afford to let down my responsibility to my kids. So, no, I could never trust the village with my kids, because no villagers would look out for their best interest than you would. My kids were worth the effort. Shouldn't each of our kids be?

You can still have a childlike heart while parenting ❤

But parents love to waffle on about how having children allows them to live their childhood again, so you are wrong

No ones being forced 🤷‍♀️

@@MelissaCaskey-wm7zp Societal peer pressure

@@MelissaCaskey-wm7zp Matt literally says if you don't have kids then you are selfish. He doesn't care how poor you are or how many mental problems you have. If you don't have kids you are lesser person than him. That's at least how I see how he thinks, and trust me, I agree on a lot of takes he has.

@@JDog2656if you’re an adult, do you *have* to give in to the peer pressure?

@@MelissaCaskey-wm7zp you don’t have to when you’re a kid either. Age is not relevant.

56 f I do not have bio kids. I was a teen when two older sisters came “home” with newborns..I was a built in babysitter! Decided then children were not for me! When asked WHY?? I simply said …..if I am not a good parent I can’t exactly take them back to the store for a refund now can I!? Fast forward to my 30s and I married a man with 3 kids. It was tough….now I have 6 grands and I would fight to the death for anyone one of my “kids”!

I'm a 47 year old non parent that hasn't given up on the unlikely prospect of fatherhood yet, and telling your kids that is pretty bad.......My parents said some stuff like that in anger but I don't think they meant it though....but to really feel that way, man

I was told that. I've been no contact for over 20 years😅

You're in a rare situation, most people do best when they have kids. It's how most people can reach their full potential. Yes some people can find other ways of being about more than just themselves, but it's rare that those people aren't sociopaths etc.

At least you knew you were a horrible person

👏❤

Theyre mentally ill. And there are several communities on reddit dedicated to people coming together to hate children and talk down marriage, and help convince themselves that single childless people are "better" than married people with kids. They're trying to validate their own decisions with all of these stories.

Same here, I was a single parent raising a daughter and now I’m a single grandmother raising a grandson, parenting is the greatest joy of my life! It’s not always easy and there are frustrations, but children are heritage from the Lord!

@@debrakelly4505 My kids, all three, are the only important thing I've done in my life.

Good for you

Exactly what I thought. He whines when people that shouldn't be parents choose not to be parents, then whines even more when those same people express that they're not happy being parents 😭

100%

Agree! It really does take the whole village to help!

There may be isolation involved here, for sure. But this goes way beyond that. This is deeply disturbing

Outside the US, there are still countries with large families and strong communities that take a huge load off of raising kids for parents. That’s how humans have worked for millennia

​@@janeflip1 I really wish people would stop repeating this outdated expression. It's obsolete. There is no village, nor should there be. I'd never think it's someone's job to help me with my children and neither should you. People don't owe each other anything.

Same here. I have never once looked in a stroller and said "Oh, what a cute baby". Never, ever, ever. Kids have just never appealed to me. That's why I always had cats because animals melt my heart, but kids never did. I knew that from an early age that kids were just not in my future. I'm fine with that, especially with some of the stories I hear from people that I work with that have grown kids. Thank God I'm not them and not dealing with that crap.

I'm willing to bet you're on some mood-altering drug (antidepressants, birth control, anxiety meds, etc.) or you had a bad childhood you haven't dealt with. To be fair, not liking some kids is perfectly normal. Not liking any kids is what is pathological.

Mat Walsh types: They will love it when it gets here! People who love cats are just trying to redirect their instinct to care for children! I called BS. I think about how I was a dog person long before I knew where babies come from.

Not having kids isn’t selfish. If anything having kids is selfish. I have a kid because I wanted a kid. She didn’t want to be here. I’m forcing her here. The least I can do is love her and provide for her. It’s a selfish choice to bring children into the world.

I think it's fine for people to not have kids , but they should still treat children as a human beens. also at the end of the day, we as humans have been build to producing, that why we have mom/farther instinct, just like every other animals and the a biological fact. what Im trying to say, is you will always as mother or father instinct to be there for the smaller ones, like for you, your cats is the smaller ones, (if that make sense) also my a cat lady too, ✊🏼✊🏼 going to grow old with 100s of cats 😤🤌🏼(English is not my first language, sorry if my bad at grammars?)

I'm sorry you went through that. How your labour shouldn't be a factor in how you feel about your child. Some women went through horrific experience and they look at their baby and go, "I'd do it all again for you."

@@racheljames7 I had both with no anesthesia. While a short labour seems to be what most women strive for I, honestly, don't recommend. I went from 0 centimeters to having my daughter given to me in 1 hour and 15 minutes. Lot's of pressure. My son's birth process was odd at best. I delivered the afterbirth first. It literally plopped out on the table still whole and full. My friend/coach (just a neighbor since I HAD to have someone with me) said it looked like a soccer ball before the doc poked it. I describe him coming out as oiled sealskin, that's the best description of it. Look at a picture of a young seal fresh out of the water, that's what it felt like. My daughter was 40 pounds of rusty chainmail. 😆 She was born 10 weeks after the last due date. I know when I had unprotected sex. Doctor's do NOT listen. Both are adults now. Two more different people you couldn't find if you searched for a thousand years.

Your mother was someone who never wanted kids but didn’t have much choice back in an overly judgmental society. Be kind to her. She didn’t have the choices you had.

@@whitneyanders5945 oh she wanted kids alright. She just wanted a son, which she got before I was born. Birth control pills WERE an option in the 60s. No stigma. She forgot to take one at the wrong time I suppose. Even abortifacients were available. No real religious issue with it either. So yes, she had options to avoid pregnancy. Be kind to her? Considering the physicality of her hatred of me (I have nerve damage in my back and legs and then there was the day she broke my sternum...), considering she knew full well what my brother was doing and did nothing, not on a bet. When she died no one went to the funeral. That tell you anything about her?

I am so sorry that was your childhood. I hope you know you did nothing wrong. Your mother cannot give you what she doesn’t have. Something is not right with her brain and she made bad choices by treating you the way she did. She will only understand the consequences of her actions when she doesn’t exist in our realm anymore. ☹️

I’m a boomer. My GreatGen parents were good when I was younger but when I hit late adolescence, both were alcoholics, mom a narcissist, dad an enabler. I still took care of them when they needed it, because they had taken good care of me. My mom taught me to love art and reading, my dad to stand up for myself (he was bullied as a kid.)

The internet gives the genetically defective a voice.

This is exactly right. There’s a lot more pressure and even isolation in modern parenting. Growing up, I spent A LOT of time with my grandparents while my divorced parents did who knows what. Now that I have kids, I have to practically beg my parents to watch my kids so I can just go to a doctor’s appointment.

I agree!! Also don't you think its because it's just more dangerous these days? There's some reason to it, even though it sucks now

​@@OliviaLanaeyeah wtf happened! Lmao

@@JaneDoe-fu3oy it’s not more dangerous outside it’s more dangerous inside with predators preying on kids while they are on social media. Actually it’s true that the 80s had the most serial killers. Kids would be far safer roaming around outside together but these days someone will call child welfare on you if you do that!

Completely agree! My parents didn't do any of the stuff I'm required to do now. I don't think my Dad even knew what school I went to! I hear you with the parents hanging around at birthday parties. I cancelled my kid's "friends" birthday party 2 years ago due to one parent bullying the other parents! It was sad as the kids got along fine.

You are amazing and didn't don't deserve narcissistic parents I hope you're doing well and are showing them and everyone around them and around you that you're doing well for yourself and making a great example on how a mature and kind human being should be. I hope you're having a good weekend because you deserve it.

I cannot imagine anything worse than being born to leftist parents.

Then you must be lying. My father was a diagnosed abusive narc (and also a pastor) and what they're describing isn't at all narcissism. Just very deep unhappiness.

Why so unnecessarily nasty

it's anti natalist psyop, whenever you see parents complaining about their kids to the point of trying to convince people not to have kids, it's the usual suspects

its too bad you didn't hear or focus on the parents that are grateful for having their children, despite parenting being hard.

however, I suppose if you know you are someone who will just focus on the negative, maybe you made the right decision. However, how do you do anything if you focus on only the negative? This will be a loss for you that you may never get to fully understand. I'm sorry.

Yup my parents were so excited to be grandparents pushing me to have babies before I was even serious with anyone. Now I have a two yo they barely take for an evening it’s just me and my significant other who works full time so we get no time alone anymore. It is truly hard and everyone glosses over those realities or worse just talks out of their asses and says they’ll be your support system.

I had the opposite problem. Everyone kept telling me how horrible and hard parenting was. Then I got pregnant and was so scared I cried all the time. My husband was excited- but I was not. Now we have three and no it’s not easy, but nothing amazing ever is. ❤

It came from the cartoon _A Bug's Life,_ but the saying from the villain holds true: "First rule of leadership: everything is your fault."