I need to take the test again, I feel like I do both also. I can't stand funerals, I've been drug to so many funerals of people I never met and didn't know, and still I cry my eyes out and I'm exhausted for days or weeks afterwards, like a shell of a person. I cry for the person who died, that they won't be able to feel the warmth of the sun on their shoulders, or feel a gentle breeze, or hear the birds chirping, won't be able to watch their kids grow up. I cry for the people left behind, parents, siblings, spouses, children, friends. It is really all too much. I don't know how to put up a wall that keeps other people's feelings out. Trying to get better, but I can't even trust a therapist.
INFJ seeking to understand the rapist and murder is very accurate. I'm always attract to extreme light and darkness of the human being and what makes them tick.
This is so accurate. I've always been fascinated by sociopaths, psychopaths or people who behave in a certain way in general and would spend hours analysing their behaviour to understand them.
Ok, as an INTP I’m a little disturbed at that part. So, underneath their exterior shell that they’ve built up, what they consider to be a callous monster with no semblance of self principle lies at the core? Just out to serve others as a walking “vessel”?
Saaaaame. I've always been more fascinated by villains and antagonists in stories, shows, movies, games, even in reality. Along with the morally grey, the misunderstood, the "deviants", weirdos, thosr considered truly evil.
Re: INFJ being Spiteful I realized at an early age that the sharpest, deadliest weapon in my arsenal was sharing unpleasant truths with people about themselves. It is something I try very hard to control and avoid doing. It is really only something I will do as a last resort if I tried to retreat and ended up cornered and my pleas for safe space are being ignored. More often it is in defense of others As an INFJ as long as I am not operating in my shadow function it feels like I am able to see straight through to people's souls at a glance and all the secrets they contain. The problem is that all to often there is some pretty toxic shit lurking beneath the surface of most adults. This is why I teach Kindergarten. Squeaky clean, untainted souls. But when life puts someone unpleasant in my path with a malevolent intent I will stab a hole in their psyche if that is what I need to do especially to protect others from them. Nothing is more deadly than destroying peoples cherished perceptions of themselves.
Sarah Olson, I’m surprised, I thought you would have worked out by now that Kindergarten-age are far from squeaky clean souls, but in fact are very raw souls, and quite a horrible age to have to deal with en masse. The primary reason? Children of this age/stage are the most influenced/directed, out of all the human ages/stages, by the behaviours and traumas of their most recent incarnation prior to this one. How does the gunned-down drug baron, or the high class call-girl, killed in a car accident, find themselves reacting when immersed back in the social world again, for the first time, in a bloody kindergarten? Kindergartens are a stupid idea that only the ignorant, civilised West could have conceived of. In indigenous cultures, children were raised by an entire village, and given the broader reality of existence, such a wise idea.
Sarah Olson Christians always seem alarmed by Jesus turning over a table (assuming he fit the INFJ mold, as I’ve heard), but (as an INFJ) I’m always amused when I read it and like “Makes total sense to me...”. 😄 Without sin, I wouldn’t call Him spiteful; but I do think a wise man’s words unheeded long enough does tend to turn into a righteous indignation overspilling... I realize this is a little rabbit trail here... just a little conjecture from my own Ni world. - Loved your post. 👍🏻
Sarah Olson I completely realise what you mean . I thought I only can do such things. Thank god I am not alone. Once I did it partially on my dad (unknowingly ), he was completely screwed. I did this on my friends and they just got fucked. They stay away from me. Now I just stay quiet. I observe every thing but stay quiet.Yeah it’s my last resort.
A little rant, my brother is an INFJ and I'm an INFP. I found this video to be extremely accurate. Because my INFJ brother did everything well and had a clear idea of what to do in a certain situation, I always thought he was mysteriously smart and had some kind of special reason or cause for doing everything. This sounds odd, but it was like he was an alien who knew how to do everything well but came to earth to live as a human for some higher cause. I stopped seeing him this way, after I realized how simple he really was. To me, INFJs seem to have a mysterious motivation in life, but really they do things for the sincere sake of doing them or learning from them. It's like they have this raw sincerity, but they are so good at hiding it so they seem complex. That's what I think, anyway.
Straw Berry haha as a fellow info female I enjoyed your comment about your brother..you are funny I'm glad he has such a sweet and loving sister who is trying to u sweet and his strange personality.
As an Ni dominant in a house with 3 Fi dominants, I have learned to reach a simmer point without boiling water. By concentrating on who I am, I can better internalize how I feel around others without unnecessary emotions. Just my flat opinion is great. When I use my Ni and start taking in data and patterns and change my perspective they start to think I'm being unoriginal but really, I love integrative thinking.
Hands down this is the best INFJ description I have ever heard... As an INFJ, I felt a little naked after watching this video... like stop telling all my deepest secrets!!! One thing that I think was a little unclear was on empathy... in order to understand WHY someone feels something, one must understand WHAT is felt. In order to understand that, we are pretty good at reading raw emotions in real time, and may even take on the emotion ourselves. Obviously I cannot step into the actual mind of another person... but my perception is that INFPs first perceive the situation of another person, which they then apply to themselves, deeply empathizing based on how THEY would feel in the same situation. An INFJ first reads the raw emotion, then conjures a situation that would make them feel that same emotion... both types having the ability to be highly empathetic... but with a slightly different approach and different biases.
From my understanding and basically all INFJ/INFP analyses, Fi/INFPs are the ones that creates emotional simulations of an others suffering to understand them and empathize, not Fe/INFJs. There’s a lot of contradictory information out there, but this was, up till now, an irrefutable consensus.
If I understood correctly, the INFP doesn’t really empathise because they react not to the pain of the other, but to the re- lived memory of their own which was triggered by the external stimulus. In my opinion, the INFPs are incapable of emptying themselves of themselves (kenosis) to feel and ‘understand’ the other’s subjective experience; all they see and feel is themselves. For me, is something like this (I don’t know if this puts me in the INFJ box, but I’ll throw this in as a personal reflection). Let’s say I see someone crying. I sit with them silently (silently because only The Divine knows what’s in their heart). However (and that’s a big ‘however’) just comforting them without addressing the issue that caused the suffering is kinda unproductive after a while. What is the cause? Whereas I cannot affect a change in their minds- souls- hearts in a direct way (I strongly believe that nobody has any right to enter the sanctuary of somebody else’s soul) I am compelled (by the fact that it’s an objective moral duty and because I don’t want to suffer feeling their pain) to do everything I can to alleviate their suffering by exterminating (lol, not an exaggeration 🔥) the external causes (such as social ones). Even if something is very personal (mourning the death of a beloved one or loss of ability due to old age), it still has a social- cultural component (are the cultural/ spiritual models and the care systems helping or causing suffering because they are ineffective or downright evil?).
It's really helpful to compare INTJs and INFJs the way you did in the Ni description: INTJ has ideas, picks the one the want most and deem good or right, and figures out the most effective method to execute the idea and passion; INFJ has ideas, picks the one that makes the most sense, and disseminates the idea and its logic for others the see and make their own decisions on.
I think the "INFJ is hard to get to know" thing is a (partial) stereotype. I think it comes from a few things - Repressed Fi/Si (forgetting their own existence); they don't talk about themselves often, or, if they do - Ni/Ti framing with Fe, which leads to impersonally approaching (and talking about) personal matters, which makes the INFJ seem distant (like they've talked *about* themselves, but never actually entering the conversation to talk with the opposite party) - Dominant Ni (which is non-verbal -- frustration with articulation and relatableness); since most people don't seem to like the same things (and can't seem to speak the same language), a lot of INFJs *choose* to become more private, and - An obsession with articulation and needing to get "bigger things" out of themselves (that feeling when something *clicks* and all these new perspectives break through the dam); INFJs often feel lonely, even when around other INFJs, *because* they're continuously attempting to explain personal concepts in impersonal ways (they may both speak the same language, but the contents still might not match up) In my experience, most people can dump their mental junk on you for years, and then suddenly go "why is the INFJ so private?" without considering they never bothered to ask how their day was going..
no one cares how I am feeling, not REALLY. They will tell me what a great listener I am, but they won't be there when I need someone to talk to. It is very lonely. To wake up one day and realize that no one bothered to get to really know ME. I cared about all these people deeply, and they just brush me aside like I never existed.
I felt like I needed to have my head examined for a hidden microphone as you explained my internal "discussions" I thought that no one knew about. Thank you
Really love how you broke down the fundamental misunderstanding/miscommunication that can happen between INFPs and INFJs. Really something to be more mindful of. You nailed it.
Interesting how you described the way an INFJ empathizes. I'm looking to adopt a cat eventually and was browsing Petfinder. I was looking at all these older cats that had clearly been abandoned by their owners and my first reaction was "God, I hate people." And then I sat there frustrated at how people could be so mean to animals. Another thing I've found is that it's exceedingly difficult for me to actually put my ideas into words. I'm definitely a perfectionist, so if I come across an inconsistency, I won't want to put my idea out there before it's refined to my (and others') liking. I usually lurk online rather than say anything because I don't want to start a dumb argument. My ideas come to me in these split second flashes of abstract images. I don't think I have a great grasp on my Ti even though I know it's there (likewise, the INTJ I know has said he doesn't quite understand his own feelings/Fi). So, because of this I almost never actually express what I'm really thinking because my understanding always feels incomplete. I often need to seek out people more eloquent/intelligent than me who can put actual words and structure to my thoughts. Anyways, great video. It's been really helpful, so thanks.
As an INTP who is very close to an INFJ: usually I’m caught by surprise at your Ti because of its tendency to be blurted out so suddenly. It’s easy to be taken aback by it. Because I’m a Ti user it’s easy for me to just sort of zero in on exactly what your type is trying to convey, albeit raw and unfettered. And usually those ideas are robust at their core, hence why I get so excited when INFJ’s are willing to pander to that side of themselves. It gives me something new to ponder, even if only for a second before they lose interest and retreat away again.
Yes, the bursts of ideas dancing like flashes according to an order you hunger to understand so you can dance (beautifully dancing, not flapping around like a headless chicken) with them 😌… It looks all too familiar to me. Unfolding them for ‘the mere mortals’ is a different, extremely frustrating matter. I don’t know about you, but I’ve long given up trying to. First, there is the mapping of the landscape of the mental tools and contents of the audience, according to a categorisation model (such as MBTI), then identify the variables (according to purpose of communication, external factors, etc), then choose the target (who is the leading one in a group or the leading factor in a system be it as complex as an ideology or a simpler one like an organisation- usually, the ideology and structure are intertwined), then harmonise the means, then choose the attention and motivation hooks, then… loose the will to live and die of sheer exhaustion 😂 The demoralising morale of all this? Just be yourself. (And have almost everybody staring blankly at you). ALMOST everybody (that emphasis matters).
About how an INFJ sees the world, what they want to do, how they go about doing it, you know? I suppose with them being such rare butterflies according to statistics (that I don't necessarily buy into all that much), there is a sense of wonder to talking to one.
If there could be one thing that I'd identify myself as in my body, they'd be my eyes. I like to..you know...look at the world and strategize. I want to use myself and burn myself like a candle. And there are many words I can greatly associate with. Heal, build, create, teach, grow, stay. They're such abstract words as I am using them, and they cover millions of thoughts and connections that happen in my mind. And xD alone stating this makes me feel so shaky and full, you know. All these reactions going on inside my body right now. I see the world with wonder and I want to help what seems to me as breaking or paining. I want to set things straight. I want to set idiots straight. As I have so much filled in me that wants to align things with justice, I'm constantly thinking about improving. And if there's one wish I make everyday, is that I be successful in performing the duties I have been planted here with
"They are therefore you to host and address you." Brilliant explanation of all the shenanigans I'm doing. I have always felt like I was "role-playing" and trying to read and meet other people's emotions and expectations of me. But I think the primary reason why I'm doing this is to be understood because I feel like everytime I'm my raw self people have no clue what I am talking about and why I am doing what I am doing.
10:08 I literally once met an INFJ who unironically talked about having encountered & warded off a kraken. She didn't use any modifiers, like, "in a dream," or "in the spirit/metaphysical realm."
The best Ni description from my experience is like a random voice in ur head that has its own brain. So u have no control of it, but it spits out random information that somehow has connection to the current situation or a current thought or what will happen in the near future. While Si would remember a random detail of a person or place that was in the past. Feel free to correct my idea.
So interesting! Just yesterday I had a discussion with my ENFP boyfriend related EXACTLY to what you describe on Fe-Fi part. I thanked him for consoling me and he said: "what? I didn't do anything on purpose. If you do it out of obligation it's worse than not doing anything at all". And i felt it was shocking because for me it doesn't matter how you feel about giving someone emotional support, as long as you do it. Haha! Gonna show it to my bf
I’m sure your boyfriend is a lovely person, so please don’t take the following as a criticism to him 😊 I’m not sure that it’s desirable to allow individuals to fulfil their moral duties only if performing them feels natural to them. That’s because not everybody has a high EQ to internalise the law to such an extent that it becomes natural to them. It’s like any other law- you must abide by it regardless of whether you feel like it or not. Caring for another should not be contingent upon genuinely caring about another. In an ideal world, caring as feeling arising from empathy and as subsequent action would happen spontaneously, but we’re nowhere near that ideal due to the thoroughly catastrophic cultural models that have kept the locus of control (emotional regulation and will) in some distant religious heaven or nebulous Superego. Embedding the moral law as structure for the subjective experience of empathy and channel for proper action, in the individual psyche, can only be achieved through culture. Proper cultural vessels.
What an insightful and well-done video. As an ENTP I relate very much to the INFJ video, as we both share that Fe-Ti axis. We both have a tendency to translate our rationally-deduced conclusions into language that others can understand.
I tested into this type and listened to this video. Absolute perfection! I never meet other people that think this way but I am glad to see so many in the comments that share the same type.
I couldn’t help but smile when I watched this video. ^_^ I’ve been so hesitant to label my preference as INFJ. I’ve been bouncing around the internet watching MBTI videos, refining my understanding for years. Recently I’ve come to ISTP, INTJ, and INFJ as possible types. This video has helped enormously. Thank you! Also, btw I was so moved I just bought your book! Looking forward to reading it!!
Hey: hopefully this will reach as many people as possible -- I will be a few days late on my usual Saturday upload. It has been a loaded week, and I haven't gotten as much done on it as I'd hoped. It is nearing completion, but when I start falling asleep while editing pictures and audio, I figure I should take a break. Just so you know, its the ISFJ Revisit: it will hopefully be out by this coming Tuesday. And after that, to be honest, I think I might need to take a break for that Saturday to recharge my batteries. Thank you for your patience and support -- see you then!
ha,ha it so happen when i get into concepts that people repeat like the gospel and to me doesn't make sense like fight or flight response, i made a video Freeze, flight , fawn and as the last resort fight, everyone repeat the fight and flight response, i don't think it went well down the gully...i look through the eyes of nature. take care INFJ CC.
We don't sympathise with bad people, we seek to understand why they did this in order to see if we can bring some light to people in same circumstances to avoid more murders etc...we don't sympathise AT ALL, we feel deep repulsion toward serial killers, mass murderers etc.. in order to stop that sort of behaviour we need to know what did cause this...
As an INFJ I can second that notion, I have no sympathy for vile humans and they tend to bring out the worst in us as INFJ's. Damaged people are drawn to us because we are mysterious yet genuine at the same time. I have no doubt that Vlad Tepes was an INFJ that was pushed too far and who snapped and then rallied the people he could trust that believed in his cause and utilized them to strike absolute terror into the Heart of the Ottoman Empire due to their tendency to steal the Wallachia children who where then abused by the Ottoman Military as sex slaves until they could be used as soldiers. Still to this day most of the world considers him a Monster but if you actually talk to the people from there he is referred to in a lot of cases as a God who walked among mortal men who descended to save them. People often fail to understand that we see the damage at the very core of most people and that if we stare into that abyss for too long and keep seeing the same type of damage coming from the same type of sources that we will start looking for permanent solutions to end the cycle that is causing it. Would I as an INFJ prefer to live in a world that was a happy and peaceful place of course I would, it would make it far easier to concentrate on moving society forward in a positive direction for the sake of humanity as a whole. But I am not a blind fool either. I realize as unpopular as my opinion may be that the ugly truth is that there is no point in me wasting my potential to help move society forward in a world gone mad where people sympathize with the victimizer instead of the actual victim as they allow the cycle of damage to keep growing by the day. So until the day we see an uprising and demand for the blood of those that spill the blood of the innocent then I as well as most of my high IQ Brothers and Sister in this world will continue to Neither Breed nor Help Society as a whole for why should we leave this world in a better condition when most of us are planning to exit our Genetics from the gene pool entirely as we don't want our would be children living in a world with such filth. I don't grasp why this concept is so hard for people to understand. You simply can not grow your future food in a garden without pulling the weeds out down to the root, as eventually those weeds will multiply and strangle out your crop and you and your children will starve. So until the day the world wakes up and decides to take out the human trash, most of the ones that I know personally are on strike. We are not producing anything more then what we need to stockpile nor are we breeding any abundance of children who would only be used as the next generation of production slaves to fund this worlds vision of bullshit tolerance for Pedophiles and Rapists. We are just going to sit back and enjoy the decline as we watch this world burn to ashes, because if you all don't actually care then why should we waste our lives helping you?
I’ve always felt like people perceive me as a Hufflepuff, but inside there’s a hidden Ravenclaw they seldom see. This video helps explain that sense of isolation and not being known by others (or by only a precious few). Incredibly helpful distinction between INFJ and INFP. I thought I knew a fair amount about being an INFJ, but much of that info focused on the Fe aspect. Seeing the role of Ti and principled detachment made so much sense. Thank you for this video!
I would argue that the INFP is the unpredictable one. They're the ones led by emotions that do not universally apply to everyone, while INFJ is led by a rationality that we can all come to.
Plot summary of Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: INTJ suffers for over 30 years while using a knife to find a ghost. INFJ serves ghost on silver platter using spoon. INTJ head explodes. THE END
This was really cool! I especially liked your contrast of INFJs with INFPs (the latter being my type). It certainly is very difficult for me to understand why INFJs would consider their surface behaviour and emotions the only thing that they want to share, whereas for me, that which is deep down and at the 'core' of myself is what I ultimately want to share (and seek from others). I also really liked the parallels you drew between ISTPs and INFJs. Thank you for posting!
I really liked the bit about primordial cores and how that’s not what INFJs fully present externally to anyone other than (maybe) their innermost circle, otherwise it just stays within. That’s what makes them (us) such social chameleons. It’s not necessarily disingenuous but it’s not fully conclusive (only partial, if that). You’ve just got to try getting to really know them.
A wonderful depiction of the INFJ. The emphasis you put in explaining Ti for an INFJ is very insightful, it seems that feature of INFJ is often overlooked in descriptions. I have often thought about the similarities between the INFJ and INTP sharing Ti-Fe although of course being split by Ni-Se and Ne-Si. I would be interested to hear your perspective about the similarities and differences between the two types. I still have yet to have a clear understanding between what truly makes Ti and Ni very different functions although I know one is a Judging function that is Rational and the other is a Perceiving Function. Thank you!
I might be able to help as I've been typed as a Ti dom for a little bit over a year until it came to light that I'm an Ni dom which is quite different.
Ti is focused on concrete fact and is really a more direct function. Ni actually takes in information, processes it within the subconscious (hence why it appears so mysterious or seems to come out of nowhere), then spits out the final product. Ni is almost like hiring a plumber because you don't know how to fix your shitty plumbing but you are providing all the necessary tools. Something like that.
As an INFJ myself, I was surprised at the accuracy of this video, at least in my opinion...especially when you said that "some INFJs may even dream of the day they can show everyone that they're not an Fe pushover...but internally, a willing, remorseless monster...for the sake of the suffering and oppressed..." ..I was surprised and yet, in an odd way...comforted by the fact that this is also evident in some of the other INFJ's...At times, I honestly, just thought I had a strange mindset or that I must be slightly deranged. (But, then again, I thought I was the only person who felt this way, PRIOR to the MBTI test we were given, in my Senior Year.) but, I digress.. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Overall, thank you for making this video...I liked how you involved Sans, from the game "Undertale." (Having only played the True pacifist run, while seeing others play the neutral and genocide runs...Sans is a very appropriate character to use as an embodiment of the INFJ personality...He's never quite what He seems to be, with a unknown background and mysterious abilities...He is the most interesting character in the fan-base, thus far. .He acts as the arbiter of the game itself..however, is virtually, never present at, during or even after your "kills." ...At least, not until the end, where you are "Judged" by the so-called "lazy comedian"...and he 's aware of the times you died, the LV you've gained and the deeds you did, as he calls you 'a dirty brother killer' right before you fight him...but, I digress. ) ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I am aware that, in reality, Sans is nothing more than a well-programmed character made by Toby-Fox. (Kudos, Toby!) What I'm basically saying, is that, Sans was an good choice to include this video...I'm sorry that 1/2 of my comment ended up being reduced to a non-coherent ode of praise to a gaming franchise...I'm well aware of this... I just wanted to state my thoughts here and let it sink to the bottom of the RU-vid section.
At 16:25 you should change the infj bubble to say "we must change the conditions of everyone like this man!!" .... infjs are not heartless "pull yourself up" people. but we do universalize and impersonalize our empathy by not relating to the feelings or the individual themselves.
i think i see what you mean lol however i think mostly Fe subtype INFJs will say "we must change the conditions of everyone like this man!!" while Ni subtypes may take a more passive, allowing(?) sort of stance. I have Ti more developed and I prefer to lean on that more in conjunction to my Ni, not so much my Fe. I would be the one to say "pull yourself up if that is your path/what you choose" instead tbh. id be much less strident.
If I understand this correctly, an example, would be be realising that the fact this man is homeless is due to the system, the conditions of society. How society is perpetuates homelessness. So one might have empathy towards one homeless person and give them something, or give to charity but it doesn't solve the ROOT of the problem. It's only putting a little piece of tape on a leaking dam, so to speak. So instead, try to change society so that there's no more homeless people, fix the problem from the source. It makes me think of deterministic thoughts, in that you're a product of many things, but among them, the environment. Change the environment and you can fix some problems. It's often hard to do things out of willpower alone, when the environment is not conductive to one self. There was some experiments with rats and drugged water showing that rats living in a good environment were less likely to become addicted and vice-versa for rats in bad environments. Then, when placing the addicted rats in a good environment, they would recover... Or if we take a human example, living in a fast food and inactive environment, most people become heavier. Move somewhere with healthy foods and lots of walking will make these people lose weight without much effort! Anyway, hopefully this wasn't too off topic, it's just a really interesting subject. ^_^ Hope someone can tell me whether I understood this. Also, I have to say that while I love these videos and they help me understand more of MBTI, I can never tell what type I am. I feel more confused than ever since I see myself in many things! XD Maybe I lack some self-awareness?
Stuck between INFJ and INFP. I do live in a dream world. I'm known to be hard to read. People are naturally drawn to me. I love my alone time. I love to understand. My motto is " leave me alone, I don't want your help but I will help you". I do judge but try not to. I am an outcast so people either hate me or love me. I love coming up with my own theories. I love light and dark. I hate letting people know my plans and emotions(but I do have random emotional outburst of any emotion). I constantly battle between head and heart. I hate being vulnerable. When people tell me their problems I detach myself but other times I am very empathetic. I have had many "psychic" moments. I'm VERY spiritual by nature. I can read people just by looking at them and feeling their energy. I'm misunderstood and feel lonely sometimes but don't want to be understood lol. People drain me. I drain myself with nonstop thinking to the point I lose sleep and have huge headaches. I'm just a huge contradiction.
Michael, the difference I see in your initial videos and the [later] "Revisiting" videos is humor you add at the end. The ISTP (with Earth being exploded by the ENFP so the Martians could see Venus better) and this one had me rolling lol "Don't get angry but seek to understand." Generally, people are all for this idea, until of course the INFJ begins to start trying to understand rapists and child molesters..
Because there's a fucking reason rapists and children molesters are around. By being triggered and annoyed at those things one misses the whole point that would bring a proper solution. Then again I'm not an INFJ. I still understand why they put everything to scrutiny, even values.
@@EXHellfire There are indeed reasons for the existence of every kind of criminals including rapists and child molesters. However, the reasons are often varied, complex and changes from individual to individual. It is never as simple as "Society made all of them criminals" as some people assume. I believe it is groundless idealism to believe that you can reform all criminals by sympathetic understanding. You can at best reform few individual cases. The most practical method is to protect the ordinary citizens from the actions these criminals by locking them up and make social changes if that is necessary in a given situation. Never let your sympathetic understanding of a single criminal go overboard and cause havoc in the lives of many ordinary individuals.
@@Hari-kx2erI would differentiate between ‘reasons’ (which, for me, is a term with teleological and directive, potentially misleading, force) and ‘explanations’; I would stick with the latter. Any criminal behaviour should be dealt with promptly and mercilessly by isolating the perpetrator in order to stop the harm. The ‘understanding’ of the subjective experience comes only afterwards. Like a proper judge, if you wish, who must pass the verdict on facts beyond reasonable doubt. However, the empathy-understanding bit must come into the determination of punishment, process in which he/ she must use their empathy in a sober way to understand the offender and to ensure administration of restorative justice and rehabilitation. That is the true balance shown in representations of Justice- the balance between the individual and the community/ society, in my opinion, because the judge has a duty of care to both. And there is another aspect to this. Nobody seems to be aware of the fact that when a proper judge passes a verdict, he/ she finds guilty not only the individual but, also, the society. Yes, the society that has failed that individual to a certain extent, by not caring enough about him/ her (and, ultimately, about their own wellbeing) to prevent the crime. There is a common responsibility that is not promoted; scapegoating (with or without basis in the individual’s behaviour) is abhorrent on moral and practical grounds. The communities should be so effectively (and correctly) self- regulating that they don’t need to bring cases before a judge. This requires, though, strong moral values embedded via healthy culture and low key (though effective) means of social control and regulation. Alas, an ideal very far from reality.
I'm an INFJ and I find myself concentrating a lot of my researching tendencies to understanding people with severe mental illnesses. In the end I feel like I live in their circumstances, I am entirely absorbed into their reality BUT not their emotions. I simply understand why they would do what they are doing, I can see all those aspects in myself and I have a hard time passionately critisizing anybody's actions, no matter how horrid they are. On the other hand, I get very strong bodily sensations, when something is not right about certain circumstances. I can instantly feel when somebody is f ex "sucking other people's energy" out of self-hatred etc, and the sensation grows stronger and even painful until I remove myself from the situation. I might even go as fas as explaining the other person what I feel in my body, and that no matter my own preferences, I must adhere to my body's messages. I usually make the mistake of trying to help them in order to myself be able to stay in the circumstanses, but it never works, because the more I try to help them the more I'm creating this INFJ loop, in which I understand the person, but don't take the necessary action to feel better myself.
The way I try to cope with this is by encapsulating the experiencing of the other. Imagine a bubble that you allow to pass through you, so you can understand the other, but don’t let it burst inside you. Will something resonate in you whilst it passes through your system? Yes, and you could pay attention to that resonance because it might tell you something about you that you didn’t know. But let that bubble pass through you. Same with everything external- even joy. Not all feeling good is beneficial. Do what you must do for the other whilst protecting yourself.
As an INFJ: you experience a raging emotional outburst while writing; literally raging with anger; yelling at the screen, and typing so fast that a typo appears in every single word -- and then -- you come back to it later with tranquil-like calmness, and are like: "yeah, I think that gets the point across."
I didn't expect this to make sense but it did. I generally get typed as INFJ but I always have doubts when I read about some other types and the relevant functions and how they are expressed. After this vid, I'm much more confident about being typed correctly as INFJ. Thanks :3
Your description of Fe vs Fi is the clearest one I´ve yet to find. So incredibly lucid and not at all hard to follow. However, what is not clear from my comment is whether or not I´m being sarcastic. To ease the pain you must have in trying to interpret my comment I´ll add that it was not my intention to be sarcastic, rather I genuinely liked your video.
Fascinating summary that articulates ideas that I haven’t heard connected anywhere else- I can tell you put a lot of time and research into your videos and it shows in the quality of your thoughts. Thank you!
Your videos are really entertaining and fun! I appreciate the concrete and concise examples, as well as the pictures to give me a solid image. I hope you continue to make these videos; I love your work.
I'm a bit taken back by your insights... You are a genius in my eyes and your type videos should be transcribed onto holy paper. Unbelievably gorgeous. Thank you so much for sharing these.
Thank you for being a voice...so we can understand ourselves. When we are feeling whole we can helps others!! All we want is to be understood and then...we can get on with spreading our love and acceptance comfortably.
When talking about the difference between empathy in INFP and INFJ, I've found that they are exactly the same thing when you get right down to it. INFPs model the feelings and values of the other person and try and feel that/understand that in order to better understand the other person. INFJs try and understand the circumstances that would make a person feel the way that they do, basically the same thing that they do with themselves and their own feelings. As an INFJ myself, the way I understand my introverted feelings is by rationally understanding the circumstances of a situation and how each factor of it makes me feel as well as why it makes me feel that way. We are doing essentially the same things but for different reasons; INFPs do it to specifically understand the other person's unique perspective. INFJs do it to understand how circumstances create situations and how certain situations effect the particular individual they are talking to. INFPs can also do this just like how an INFJ can model someone's Fi and apply it to themselves, but just as INFPs natural way of understanding someone's position is obscured from the world so is the INFJs. I don't know if that can be called sympathy since INFJs also tend to take on the emotions of others and catering to them for that person, trying to help that person blossom in a multitude of ways--I'd say that INFPs are the ones being sympathetic because they distinguish themselves at all times from someone else while modeling their emotions, remaining solid in their own values and interpretations of things regardless of what anyone has experienced. Wouldn't you call that sympathy?
I agree. And I've always personally felt what INFPs do in my life as more sympathy, rather than true empathy, as they do hold heavily on to their own feelings over almost all else.
See....this is a very good example about “IN”. Mostly people assumed that “IN” is a character that usually stay silent and anti-social, I’ll take that idea back. “IN” isn’t about verbal communication but rather it’s about closure, personal space as well as knowledge. As an “Infj I talk a lot about ideas relating to psychology and if I can’t talk I will write. I will questioning everything.....It’s just that my communication is less humorous but it’s more meaningful.
The part about INFJ’s ‘relishing the look of confusion’ on another persons face due to the frustration of not being heard is in my experience inaccurate. What the INFJ would most likely be relishing is the possibility of a breakthrough in understanding for the other person around the subject. Besides that, this is a pretty insightful description.
I thoroughly enjoyed this, Michael! You were reading right into my soul, ha! Even the tough parts. Encouraging, thank you! I will add, I may sympathize in a sense to why someone would do something horrific, as you said, but would in no way justify it. Just wanted to clarify so people understand sympathy and justification are not equal. :)
Spot on, except one thing. I can't claim to speak for every INFJ out there, but I don't tend to feel sympathy towards people. I Emphasize with them in order to understand what they feel, why they feel so, and how I can fix it if there's something wrong. If someone is just standing around feeling sympathy for a person, lets say pitying them I see that as cruel. You either try to help people, or get out of their way to give them space to get up themselves. You don't make a pity crowd to drain them of energy, and make them feel worse about themselves. Sometimes when you try to help even a few words can help a lot. So if you know how to help, but don't have much time, just do what you can. Nobody can ask for more than that. It's not like one person can save the world alone, but everyone can do something.
Wow, I've watched a dozen other videos trying determine whether i am INFP or INFJ and yours was the only one that clearly presented the criteria and left me completely sure that I am INFJ and most definitely not INFP. Well done! Thank you for your careful and clear laying out of the the differences! However, it would be even more helpful if you might list your credentials so that your conclusions might be given even more weight. Thanks again!
18: 11 understanding "evil": been there done that. I got screwed over by a narc. Got to know my own darkside and did a deep dive into personality disorders. Fascinating! Now most "evil" deeds can be simply explained by a sick persons NEED for money,attention or control/power. These toxic people have many warning signs if only you know what to look for. That and "normal" people also have toxicity in their behaviour. The infj for example, our perfectionistic tendencies are toxic to ourselves. Its not a good characteristic its a weakness we should keep in check. No one is supposed to be perfect....wanting to APPEAR perfect is a thing narcs do....a person without a weakness is a person without strenghts or a personality. A weakness is your strenght when it gets out of balance. Don't stick your head in the sand about your weakness cause then it will be used against you sooner or later (probably by the narc). But yes the infj would try to understand evil and take on the devils advocate role for a bit....only to understand where they are coming from and how to fix it....if you can fix that. Or in my case, how to prevent myself from falling pray to that again.
Thank you for your commentary and explanations. It is helpful when you do mention the other personality Styles when you are clarifying to make a distinction.
Thank you so much, Michael. I identify most, and so strongly, with the "condition" of Infj , so I believe I am one, maybe get an official assessment someday, who knows. . . All in the video was so exceptional but the Enlightenment aspect really vibrated with me as I am actually, privately, a devout student of such, and this world is my school : ) There is a certain discipline, in which Enlightenment becomes one's ultimate goal, and a branch of that discipline, which aims for that same transcendence, not only for oneself, but every "one." I am sure you are contributing to raising the level of the seas, that all the boats may float higher : ) I mean that in the most positive and uplifting (ha) way. Thanks so much for your stellar contributions!
Fantastic video Michael! I'm really starting to understand and envy INFJs (as an INFP)! I love the analogy of the "magic trick" of the INFJ. I think that whole segment, and adjacent parts, paint a perfect picture. I would argue that INFPs have a potential for logic, though. While I believe that seeking your own feeling towards a topic is very important, thos feelings must be backed up by logic. I hate nothing more than people who do not support their arguments with facts and logical reasoning. SFJs are frustrating for me in this regard. Also, finally someone highlights the difference between INFP empathy and INFJ sympathy (words that are sometimes mistaken as synonyms). Absolutely perfect analysis. It would be awesome if you actually expanded on that specific part of the video into a full video. Empathy vs. Sympathy as it relates to MBTI. Again great video. However, I think you accidentally screwed with the opacity of your layers in your video making software? You can always see the previous slide showing through by about 5-10%. Make sure you fix that before the next video (assuming it is some default setting you accidentally triggered)! If its supposed to be a stylistic choice (like laying down pages, and the light shining through), I'm just letting you know it is a tad distracting as a viewer. Great video as always. Keep up the great work!
My only critique would be that some of the examples used seemed to imply that all INFJs come to the same “truth” or conclusion about life (like in religion); however, and I’m sure you already know this but, we all begin with a different foundation or base for our understandings of life and can, therefore, cast wildly different mantras and manifestos (Hitler and Jesus supposedly sharing a personality being one such example). Even so, I loved the thought bubbles and various expressions used in this video that aptly identified the varied currents of thoughts! Really helpful. Thanks!
When I first took the Myers Briggs test, I was an ISTP. Although, I wasn't really honest with the questions about feelings and intuition. Now that I'm older and more comfortable with those aspects of my personality, INFJ is definitely more fitting.
I always describe Ni as being mechanical. It tries to make sense of underlying mechanics of sensory observations. It doesn't fare well with those who hold the idea of Ni being some sort of mystical function that can predict the future. But I do agree with INFJs being an inverse ISTP of sorts. Their other introverted function, Ti, being a systematizer doesn't help either. Ni is all about making sense of the underlying mechanics. Being a subjective function, this gets tangled up with other ideas, feelings and experiences of the subject. I also feel like people overestimate the warmth of Fe/Ti users and overestimate the coldness of Te/Fi users. TPs and FJs can appear cuddly, but there's not a whole lot going on inside necessarily. It's a projection of warmt rather than the experience of it. That's not to say that the warmth comes from a fake place; it doesn't. Like you noted, INFJs (and I guess I as an ENTP) feel a very strong sense of personal duty. But I feel like it's more instinctual than affective. It's experienced, rather than felt. But it's expressed through a language of care and affection. The experienced affect comes from a perceived failure to fulfill said duty, or joy from having fulfilled the duty.
I would say Ni ,is a function,that allows the users ,to make connections between Symbols and Events. In a sense it's a language of the unconscious mind,which everyone has. Expect Ni dominant people; are closer to the edge of the unconscious process. Like sitting down at the edge of a river observing the kind of fish types;swim by. We do that with unconscious. It does NOT try to make sense of sensory observations at all. As a matter of fact we use Sense observations to get Eureka/A-ha moments. The fourth function,while being the worst,is also the door for the subconscious for each individual. Another example is the INFP 4th-Te,when they start to write their thoughts,amazing insights occur. For INTJs and INFJs,having a walk in the park,observing wonderful nature; could spark all kinds of insights. The Senses we observe is like our subconscious talking to us. -- However Ni is definitely mechanical in the sense; that it is self-learning; But that's the combination of Ni-Te-Fi-Se/Ni-Fe-Ti-Se. Of all the functions working together. This combination also makes individuals ; look for underlying principles,like you described indeed. Ni is very binary'stic in its processing; since it is an unconscious process;which is most closely to how a brain functions. Which is a complex string of Yes or No. In well-developt individuals who are Ni dominant;it is easier to see;how they talk through their Ni and Te/Fe at the same time. They make complex sequences of yes and no's,and group those together, to make again a yes or no,which is the main yes or no. Plato's dialect; about opinion is a perfect example,on how he thinks in binary.
Ni is on the other end of the Se axis. Both functions are observational and take sensory information "as is". All Ni does is try to synthesize an underlying mechanic that makes sense to the user.
blackholecat Nope it doesnt, Ni doesnt take observations ''as is''. It observes patterns inside the mind. Making connection trhough the unconscious mind. For example; Tree is cat, cat , tree, cat, quote, event, symbol, image. Is how our Ni ''talks''. Which all go to a particular Eureka we are looking for, which can be triggered by a finall unconsiousc language word; which could be something seen from the outside through Our Se. A particular sound, sight,smell can trigger a Eureka with a enourmous intenisty. Its like combing knowledge from 10 books who have been read 1 month ago, with 10 books read 1 week ago. In a second. As a INTJ,i can speak from experience. Again your points are spot on; in the context you were talking about. That is when Ni is combined with other functions, like Te. '' All Ni does is try to synthesize an underlying mechanic that makes sense to the user.'' ^This is not Ni ,this is Te. Te makes the judgement of what is important or not. Not Ni ,is just is. It just does his thing. Ni, does not take any information in. It plays with information inside our subconscious mind. For example i have read 100 books,i can't literally recall 1 book. But i dont mind,since my Ni is working day and night aranging that info,and feeding it to singular purpose.
+Elf Machine "For example i have read 100 books,i can't literally recall 1 book." LOL my experience can attest to this as well. It sucks when you're interrogated about a specific piece of a model you presented and you literally cannot answer the question (at least immediately) because you're so zoomed out.
Im a quater threw. I love the stone in the water. While people are watching the ripple on the water. Im thinking how far that sound or vibration will go under water that fish hear it. I think we will be amazed!
amazing video!! made me think about toni morrison (infj) and the way she uses situation and language to explore the emotional and motivational experiences of others. super insightful
Wow! I know I'm late on commenting as this was published so long ago, but I am currently working on my dissertation on staff-to-student sexual misconduct in special education. The description in this is SO spot on to my thinking. I feel that it is impossible to solve this problem without shining a light on the TRUTH of the 'why's' that drive this, which, whether we like it or not, are often part of our human nature--warts and all. And while I definitely have feelings about the fact that these things are happening; I absolutely feel that the ONLY way that 'we' can solve this problem (assuming 'we' see this as a problem and want to solve it--which I definitely do); I have approached it from an investigative aspect; like Faizal below states; I seek to understand. I firmly believe that we will never be able to create policy that is truly helpful when we base it on what "should be" or shouldn't be (i.e. 'people shouldn't molest kids'...sure, but we know they do! So....now what??). We MUST start with what IS and work out from there; because, sadly, what the know IS, is that this has been happening for centuries and globally. What we know and must admit is there is an appetite for 'kids and teens' (it's what drives trafficking at increasingly record numbers) and violence, etc. Whether I like it or not, it's there. As much as I want that to stop for all of our sakes--I am forced to examine the 'whats' and the 'whys'; and it IS dark. It's actually almost soul-shattering. But it is what it is--what we know is that so very few of us have not been sexually victimized, for instance, and it got me thinking--the chances of that happening at the hands of 1-2% of the population running around rogue molesting and assaulting a majority of the population, just didn't make sense. And what is sadly truth--is that lots of people (us? me???) are doing things that are in-fact, or at least perceived, as those things. The beauty, I feel, is that, through this initial acknowledgement, is a path to a solution that doesn't deny sexuality, but also protects people who need and/or want protection. Anyway--thank you for your segment!!
Wow , I'm amazed with this video ! I will listen to this in my car every morning for work until I g er t everything down packed and understood . Thank you !
As an INFJ, my end goal is not just to understand why the murderer does what they do. The hope is by understanding, we then can find ways to foresee & potentially stop that behavior from reoccurring. It's not just macabre curiosity that drives the interest. This goes for all aspects of human behavior. By understanding what drives us as individuals, we then have more understanding and opportunity to choose actions which are more beneficial for all of us. In an unhealthy INFJ this can go off the rails into idealized extremes. But in healthy INFJs, it comes from a place of true compassion.
I infj male, loved the analogy to an RPG character having small but unlimited life points. That describes my life in which I have endured or journeyed through injustice and persistent abuse. Somehow in still alive and kicking, and not sure how I've survived.
Is it possible for you to provide a text version of this too, by any chance? I find myself wanting to type all of this down, and probably will if there is no choice! It is not just the quality of your insight but the beautiful flowing writing style that captures me and makes me want to have it available at all times. Sincerely, an INFJ
Hey Anna, I'm flattered by your praise! However, I'm afraid that's become a bit of a tricky question, because pdf forms of my video scripts with pictures and all are currently one of the rewards for my Patreon. BUT! Do you mind if I have your email, or some other way of contacting you? I think I can work something out. Michael Pierce
''the follow a set of priciples that they will not break no matter what they feel or fancy at a particular moment''... You have cleared up unbelievably much for me. In so many instances through out this video i had an ''...ohhhhhh...'' moment. I was wandering for so long why i felt too objective to be an infj but intj did not fit me either because of Te. Started wandering i might be an infp and you cleared up pretty fast that i am not one. Did not know Ti and Ni worked that way together. Thank you thank you thank you
after watching so many videos about INFJs, I'm beginning to think I may be. Seems everything I have seen-even this video describes me exactly. How on Earth this is so accurate is astonishing and very interesting. Do keep up the great work on these videos. Maybe I'll be able to figure out exactly what personality type my husband is sometime in the near future.
The way you described how things were seen. I don't just look at something and go oh that's neat. I wonder how it was done and how it affects things around it. Then there's the fact I just know things. I'm always completing my husband's sentences, picking up on his feelings and find myself feeling just like he does at the end of the day. When we put our dog down this past Thursday I was far more upset than he was, like I took most of his sadness into myself. CoCoknew what was happening and I felt her fear as well. I have premonitions sometimes- one I had in vivid precise detail down to where, how, and what the other vehicle would be three times before totaling my car and the other car the following week, walking away without a scratch or burn. My world to me is just so much more than meets the eye. The video describes it so perfectly.
okay. so I had said that i have always typed as infj for like 15 years. ...but I keep second guess myself..sometimes thinking I'm the cute infp. but after watching your infp and no resonating at all..I watched this one and started grinning and laughing out loud and then oddly enough tearing up. it's bang on. the *house* metaphor was aedosme cause it's so true for my emotions but actually for my literal house. I am definitely this kind seeking person but have many many shields and I hide relentlessly ....I peel away my depth of layers very very slowly. to the point I can say no one really knows me at all. and I cannot handle intrusive questions intrusive people...intrusive anything. I'll talk about you all day. I'll talk of the universe to no prevails. but I will not talk of my deep inner self.
I'm a mage/wizard character, I can summon the dead, give you a potion for pretty much anything you can think of, got info on dozens of topics ranging from necrophilia to the best chili recipe, I can help you sort through personal issues n trama and I'm fantastic support both emotionally mentally and magically, why just last week I found a skeleton soldier in the heart of a dungeon and instead of simply felling him like a sapling I offered him guidance and we sat down and talked for a solid 2 hours about being dead and in the end he was able to accept his fate and I'm proud to say he was able to pass on to the next life, it made me feel so happy that I went to my local bar and got plastered and woke up the next day in the bed of the town blacksmith, I'm not sure what led to it or what happened but me and him are good friends now, something about urges and the need to pound, yes.. good friends..