She gave him permission to break her heart a second time. If a man leaves you, ignores you for 8 months, then decides he wants to get access to you again…. Run!!!
I have been through this numerous times and the main reason he goes ghost is because he has found another woman and the woman has dumped him for his bad behavior and he returns back not because he loves you but because he doesn't want to be alone. But the minute he finds another woman he will be gone again. This is a cycle that men can not break.
Literalllllly!!! That was the MOST disturbing part! She couldn’t speak on it for more than 20 seconds before she was nearly sobbing from the pain it still caused her to speak about it. Yet HE comes along telling the story as though it is a hilarious little light hearted rom com story. The lack of empathy and the complete disconnection from the pain he caused her was gross.
@@queenreg7 She said she wasn't sure she'd ever see him again. I really hope that kid isn't his. Or he's a terrible father on top of being a terrible partner.
Not only did he ghost her, he ghosted THEIR son! Let that sink in. Her being desperate directly affects her son. She should've put him on child support instead of texting and crying every day🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️
Ok, but let's talk about the sister behind her who is trying to hear the story while minding her business lol. You know she wanted to say something but also say nothing at all lol
As a father how do you give your babygirl to a boy like this? As a mother how do you cry tears of joy watching your daughter get settled for? Why do they think this is what she deserves?
Wow, even having a baby for this guy didn't work! This is peak desperation. I could never. Not for some loser. Someone wants to do this to me, he'd better have a billion dollars in the bank signed over to me and have WEEKS left to live, lol! Otherwise, WALK!
Unfortunately some women have to go through hell with a man in order to learn better while others dont even need experience cuz we observe what happens to other women (me for example). She will learn with time.
She doesn't realize her worth. Luke 12:7,KJV But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows.
Not only will she stay, but he can jackoff to the fact that she’s probably crying about him being gone…living his best life… She showed him… She showed the world… May her self esteem be healed…we have to find it first…
No it's time women like this stop letting the sisterhood down. Cause they will only be forsed to be better to respect women when women don't put up with it.
@kaycampbell364 Well, they need to learn. They need to learn to be content with themselves and stop looking for others to determine their worth. This is pathetic and should not be an option.
That friend standing behind her in the beginning has had enough of the mess, but will stand with her friend even through the bad choices 😂 I know that look
You mean to tell me that she was out here screaming I Love You into the void for 8 whole months with tears and snot running down her face while he gallivanted all over the place having the time of his life?
I wish a 🥷🏽 would. Someone’s just tried this with me, his restraining order is on its way, do not ever leave me and try and circle back. It’s an insult!!
Even if her family was unaware because it's not unusual to keep breakup details from family, why did her friends support this? We confide in girlfriends, support and guide each other. I'd have drop kicked someone before bearing witness to this marriage!
@@duchesseebene1273but peep her black friend.. you could clearly see she did not approve of this union. Her facial expressions said it all. She couldn't even bring herself to fake a smile
That's why we need to normalize blocking if they try to come back. This is partly a cultural problem (in that we validate them and don't criticize enough for doing this) and partly a parenting problem.
It’s women who aren’t t married and aren’t “religious” but rather “spiritual “ and pray to their “ancestors” who live like this everyday . They call it common -law- living with a man , whom she thinks can not “ live without her”, but still manages to sleep around with other women often anyway. Black women mostly practice this at high rates today.
He ENDED things with her folks. Its not like he was taking time to work on himself and go to therapy. He went and sowed his wild oats. After his type didnt want him anymore, he circled back to this pickmeisha
It cuz she was his fall back. No guy that loves you enough to want to marry you can stomach the thought of you dating other men. Always knew you would be waiting.
I'm surprised at how far down the comments I had to scroll to see this. From the moment I heard him talking about how she stayed in contact despite having no hope I realized he's a narcissist.
@@mlake4725 Yes. Narcissists and stalkers make rounds like this when their other plans don't quite work out the way they wanted. Sometimes they settle on whoever is meeting their needs at the time and in her case she's the unlucky candidate. I'm so sad that women like this think they won some kind of prize but I can't say I haven't been there...with an actual narcissist. Sometimes you don't know until you know.
@@user56gghtf I agree. It took me years of abuse to realize what was going on. The more we expose these people the better. People need to be educated on these demons so they don’t fall victim.
@prncessbaby16 Yep. He’s the type to barely even be a parent it seems- just a warm body in the house, but at least he “comes back”. Nevermind the fact that he didn’t even care about that baby for almost an entire year though.
@@AmberColeman-gq1wn that's exactly how I took it as well but even her friend behind her was embarrassed for her and had a wtf look on her face when the bride was telling the story all proudly like that's not an accomplishment lol
This is typical cluster B behavior. He was bored and wanted to see if he could find a better woman. And either the other woman dumped him or he decided that she wasn't that great and he leaves her, then he returns because he doesn't want to be alone and needs s3x. He never loved you so he will leave again because he knows that you will take him back.
😂 I agree and it shows that ppl have no shame whether what they say is true or fabricated just for views or in hope to go viral they don't mind putting themselves out there . We definitely need to bring back shame bcuz it seems ppl of today have none at all smh.
Ewwwwww gross! Now let me tell a quick version of my story. I met my husband in 2003. We became friends and started dating in 2004. He immediately got my name tattooed on his leg and all his friends thought he was crazy. We got married in 2005. There was no 8 month break! This year is our 19th year married and those friends who thought he was crazy has never been married, they got plenty of kids and think of my husband as a lucky man!
Tattooing a name or his friends not being married years later isn't a flex! You sound self righteous,but good for you and your 19 identity year marriage 😂
@@jltdqwAmen! I love this for you! My hubby proposed after a year of dating…and the year before that we had only been eye-stalking each other at the gym. Our hating ass friends knew each other but didn’t want us dating for some reason. So it took us some time before our first date. We got married the year Obama won….together ever since. Nothing better than people who know what they want.❤
That's definetly one of those cases where when they know they know and I love these kinds of stories. But to be fair, apart from the fact that the friends seem to be fathering a lot of children with no responsibility(at least that's what I gathererd ) marriage is not always the destined path for everyone and that's OK.
This must be a new olympic match of lowering your standards. She marathoned for this man, after Chris ghosted her for 8 months, like Flo Jo in a soap opera. The sis in the back of the marriage video, while Lydia was talking and crying, was giving her judgement and shocked faces while being polite.
I don't consider this to be romantic in the least, but *they* must, because they put it in their wedding video. 🤢 Instead, I think that it's pathetic. I wish this woman the very best, but I suspect that life isn't going to be easy for her now. She's always going to feel the need to prove herself by being his doormat. By the way, that man was *bragging* when he described how she lowered herself for him. Also, she's totally out of his league.
Full transparency I WAS her for the better part of 7 years. My youth GONE, best years GONE! I didn’t heed the signs and trust me I was taken for a RIDE! A horrible one! Now that I realize my worth and added tax my guy is loosing his shit that I’m leaving and moving on. Toxic partners always go back to the dummest dummy and unfortunately I was her to think I was being chosen. It’s not the love story that she THINK it is!
To sum it up he left, no woman gave him any attention and went back to her because he knew she’d take him back 🙄. Leave him girl and start loving yourself.
My inner 22 year old with stars in her eyes is all like, "Oh! So romantic. God answers prayers. " I'm actually 59, cynical, and agnostic. Let's teach our young girls to love themselves first. I hope they have a long and happy marriage and shock us all.
What got me angry, were the little smirks that his little troll friends were exchanging while he boasted about how much this poor lady was on the hook for him. And the whole family lovingly looking on as she commits her life to a guy that has shown her that he could take her or leave her so easily is probably the saddest and biggest ick about that video for me.
This is a traditional family, they probably are willing to forgive him and give him a new chance because that's what the daughter wants but are going to keep a close eye on him. The father and/or brothers especially.
I wish she had spent that eight months grieving her loss and then took steps to keep moving forward with her life with or without him. And let HIM get it together and come back if he felt in his heart to do so and then CHOOSE to take him back from a healed heart and spirit. Praying it works out for her and her husband and children. It’s giving uncomfortable vibes.
I knew a Christian woman who waited begged and believed her husband would return after cheating then abandoning her for Six years. Yes six years and sometimes would call her while around the other woman. She refused to file divorce or move on. Well six years later he returned and she thanks god for her miracle. Aaand No. I’m not being sarcastic🫠
There are some things your pride as a woman should stop you from doing. Chasing a man should be the top of the list. This man will never respect her. He tried to be with other women, but they had the good sense to reject him, so he settled for her.
Oh trust me she was told but still wanted that man in her life. Pals lie to your face and do the total opposite behind your back. Can tell by the black bridesmaid at the back 😂😂😂 she was so over it from her facial expression. Struggle love
@JaiClaire880 She looks like she's apart of the beauty squad and if that is her friend, she's not really her friend. Real friends don't let real friends be that thirsty
@@SincerelySandcha nah, I let my friends be adults. I tell them my opinion, let them make whatever decision they are going to make, but choose to be by their side should the day come when things go south. I don’t control my friends, but I let them know what’s up so they know I don’t like or trust their man. Because what I’m not going to do is be fake and I can’t force them to make the decision that I want them to make. But trust and believe if I could, I would because one of them is very thirsty.
he's a narcissist. the way he was waving at guests when he walked into the ceremony sold it for me. like he's playing a role. he's gonna terrorize her throughout their marriage. the fact she's still crying as she tells the story feels like she hasn't processed the trauma of him ghosting her, let alone even understand that it's emotional abuse behind it. there's no remorse from him as he tells the story. he's bragging in front of the men like "look at how thirsty this girl was for me, i'm such a man" - and we alll know the type of men who feel the need to convince everyone that "i'm such a man" are often hiding something about their sexuality
This kind of makes me angry for her! She had the CHANCE to marry a guy who genuinely LOVED HER who would have moved mountains for her, but she got this guy.
@@almondjoy123Or not. She chose the best option she had, and kept the original father for the kid. If life was perfect she'd have chosen the perfect guy, but now we'll never know.
Nope I have been in this world for decades and can for the most part call a spade♠️ a spade♠️! Please refer to my above comment. It is probably not socially or religiously accepted for him to be gay, therefore Lydia is playing the role of a "beard". It is sad that he is playing the role of an actor in their lives! He even ghosted his own kid for those 8 months as well. Sad situation indeed.
Ending up like her is my worst nightmare. I still show signs of this type of thinking. I refuse to date before I deal with this stuff. Even if it means never dating. Because damn. Her situation is horrible and I would rather be alone.
You have to TEACH people how to treat you cause they will run with whatever they can if you don't. She was too busy chasing instead of creating self love and boundaries.
He could've blocked her, gotten a restraining order, changed his number or/and moved away. He purposely left room for her to come & beg, because he loved seeing her grovel. He left the communication line open, because he wasn't sure he'll find what he was really looking for.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again… Most men know between 3 and 6 months if they want to wife you up. And YOU WILL KNOW. He’ll take intentional steps to make you his.
There's a part of me, 1% of me, that wonders what level of desperation a person has to be on to keep reaching out to some low-grade, worthless, pitiful, low-life that deliberately, purposely and intentionally ignored you/ghosted you for 8 months straight...just to then turn around and marry him when HE decides he thinks he has a right when it's convenient for him to have access to you again! The other 99% of me isn't the least bit curious! Edit: I'd rather DIE the same way I came into this earth, ALONE! I'd rather DIE ALONE, BY MYSELF surrounded by dogs and cats than to date, MUCH LESS marry, someone that makes me look THAT pathetic!!!!
So unfortunate that soooooo many women have parents/guardians who let them down when it comes to teaching them about self-esteem, self love and self respect. 😔
She said “I didn’t want to say yes” so sad. Self betrayal is so accessible when the sensation of hope overrides our intuition or higher purpose. This was weird as hell
