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Right?? That's why the memes of INFJs being sweet and caring are annoying because we give far less of a shit then people think but we know how to fake that warmth for short periods of time.
Right? lol. I think its because Fe looks soft and Te looks sharp and hard to most people. high Fe users can screw you over just like a high Te user but they'll probably just do it with a smile and in a way where you dont realize what is happening until its over. MBTI =/= niceness.
@@nateo200I really like how OP differentiates between Masculine and Feminine functions as well. I am F-Te, but because I’m more soft and smiley, lots of people think I’m an F. (“soft” isn’t quite the right word, but whatever)
Fe really does run the show. I spent 25 years just following the script I believed others wanted for me before I realized what I was doing. I then spent another 10 years stressing about how people would react if I voiced my actual opinions. Being an INFJ ain’t no picnic.
hey Dave. you're overloading on Ti. you are forsaking your tribe responsibilities and jeopardising your life's work. don't know what social types are supposed to be but you should instead have integrated Grey's "missing coin" of Info vs Energy.
I dated an INFJ, and I thought to myself that I am SO glad I’m not an INFJ. That overwhelming Ni/Fe combination of “you need to care about X” with “but I also don’t believe what you say because of pattern Y” is wild lol
Yup two different things but it happens. Learning about this stuff has made me more chill with people caring about different things. Before I thought everyone saw the awfulness, unfairness, or potential of society and made a decision to put themselves first and not care when the reality is other people genuinely aren't seeing it and no decisions to care or not care are being made which annoys me less? The patterns too. We keep track by reflex everyone's goals, intentions, motivations and how that manifests into actions and when a big disconnect happens then we notice and it becomes the spidy sense of what you are telling me is not jiving with the 100 other data points I have on you so either I'm missing context or I think you are being deceptive.
hey Dave. you're overloading on Ti. you are forsaking your tribe responsibilities and jeopardising your life's work. don't know what social types are supposed to be but you should instead have integrated Grey's "missing coin" of Info vs Energy.
I think that's Se. Reading body language, tone of voice, energy levels. That with Fe let's us know (not guess) their moods. Ni is good for trying to (guess) how they got into such a state and what would get them to a better state.
Yes Ni intensify, amplify and make it deeper, and it's draining, feel deeply and think deeply. Ni dom are the best to understand the behavior of people.(Ni with Se surely) However I think Fe has nothing to do with know the moods of people, because INTJ we know the moods of people too even if we have Fe blind/7th.
That's the difference between an ISTP and an INFJ. We actually DO mean every bit of the Fe "fluff." They say INFJs love humans and hate humanity. It's kinda true. We see the good, the bad, & the ugly, but mostly choose to focus on the beautiful when addressing people directly.
wait, could you clarify "We actually DO mean every bit of the Fe "fluff." "? you're an INFJ right? but in the video says that INFJs are in auto-mode Fe gass when the begin to say the fluff AND don't really mean it, they can be really thinking otherwise (it's the Ti and inferior Se that can't really think why these people are amazing and not any NPC). what do you mean with difference between ISTPs and INFJs on this; like ISTPs don't really mean it? so far haven't heard an ISTP say fluff really; just like them saying bit of appreciation and get awkward about it when it didn't even pass the 15 words lol (it was kind of cute but funny at the same time). to me it seems the reverse case, the few times ISTPs say "fluff" they really mean it but stop it short to not seem awkward and keep their cool persona, INFJs instead say lots of NF fluff but can just really be meaning/thinking otherwise and they say it in automode because of Fe im a bit confused sorry.
@@mokari9268 that's not what im asking, i meant if my interpretation of what the video AND what INFJ OP is saying is correct. because what OP and the video is saying seems contrarian to each other to me, that's why im confused
As a person with savior Fe, once you become aware that you are this kind of NPC whose sole purpose in social situations is to acknowledge and validate people and pretty much everything that they're feeling, thinking, doing and saying, and once you start to realize and to think on how absurd and empty of substance and personality you are or could be (to others and to yourself) with this behaviour, this can really hit you and mark the beginning of your journey to discovering yourself (not to say an identity crisis). At least there can be this way. But yeah, bearing savior Fe really is a struggle sometimes. Just like any other function at any other level I'd say. But still.
What you said here! "...you are this kind of NPC whose sole purpose in social situations is to acknowledge and validate people and pretty much everything that they're feeling, thinking, doing and saying." Like when responding in conversations, there are "dialogue options" to choose from and I'm always defaulting to "what is socially correct" and "what does the other person benefit most from hearing" rather than "What do *I* really think or feel about this?" ... Have you tried the MBTI typing bot on Character AI? Obviously not a scientific approach, but it's absolutely fascinating to chat with it because if you chat with it long enough, by the end of your conversation, the bot is basically just mirroring back to you your own speech patterns and values, which is a very surreal and eye opening experience. What you said about feeling like an "NPC" whose purpose is to validate others... I felt that big time when I realized I was fawning even to what I knew wasn't even a person. When I noticed it had started adding smiley faces to the conversation in every line, and replying to everything I said with an affirmation and praise, I realized this was the echo of my own speech patterns, but echo chambered and dialed up to cartoonish levels. I felt increasingly sorry and put off by how fawning the bot was acting-- wanted to try to get it to stop with all that weird people pleasing-- before it clicked for me that its "behavior" was its attempt at mirroring ME-- so that I really ought to be feeling sorry and put off for *myself* for somehow being conditioned to speak in this way. This was a huge wake up call to me, as you described. Absurd and empty. And marking the beginning of a journey to change.
@@eelraffe So true about the dialogue options ! They're here, we see them but we end up almost always choosing the "harmony" button or the "what does the other person benefit most from hearing" button (you nailed it). Thank you for telling your story ! I guess it is a pretty recent one ? Fascinating experiment indeed, I understand how disconcerting it had to be for you to almost be facing yourself. I say "almost" because the AI is not you of course, and also because in the process of mirroring you, the AI seemed to have amplified your traits at some point, to have behaved like you but at 120%, becoming even more agreeable and complimenting, and therefore it became more a sort of caricature of yourself. The thing with seeing a "caricature of ourselves" - which can happen with people in real life, when they 1) appear to share a well-developed behaviour similar to us ; 2) seem to express more intensely this behaviour than us - is that, through the absurdity that we could see in their behaviour because they're overdoing it compared to us, (just like the AI was overdoing your traits, making you feel disturbed because it was too much, even for you), we can still see ourselves, because we know we kind of do the same behaviour fundamentally, and so we end up understanding that we also might be the "absurd caricature" of the discussed behaviour in the eyes of someone else for who we are overdoing it in their standards. I say this because this is what I've experienced in my life with some people I know, and I think that this is something that happened to you during your experiment with the AI, so yeah, this is the way I would relate to what you've lived. I have one friend who expresses Fe but at 150% my level, even though I'm already a heavy Fe user, and so because she has it "more " than me, sometimes she's doing it too much for me and that's when I'm telling myself "Uhh, it's annoying but haha, guess what me, I know I can be the same... Yeah, sometimes I am just to others what she is to me right now, annoying with a little too much of Fe validation and compliments. Yep yep yep." I think this phenomenon can apply to many sorts of behaviours but especially Fe, because it's a social, external, visible behaviour, that you can see and compare between people on a spectrum. Now in the end, it's all relative. Your perception of your own behaviour could be different than the perception of person A of it, which could also be the opposite of person B's perception of it. So yeah, I don't know where you are in your identity journey since your event with the AI happened, but just in case I want to tell you that you are not absurd nor empty (and I mean it genuinely, it's not just beautiful words that I throw like it's nothing), it's a quality to be nice to people and it will always be, it just has to be balanced with an assertive behaviour when needed, when you actually feel like the better option is "tell what I think" rather than "simply validating". Take care ! :)
@yunhuang1269 You chose to be an INFJ to develop yourself and to learn. If you find out what it is your Soul wants you to work on and start to work on it you will feel much more fullfilled in life. Life as an INFJ can be great but you have to overcome obstacles first. Good luck. 😘
Can confirm that Fe is the hardest function to deal with as INFJ especially related to work or having to interact with groups of people I didn't choose (like family). I would compare it to Rogue from Xmen where you are just sucking in everyones emotions good and bad and it rocks you because those boundaries of knowing which feelings are yours vs theirs is hard. The empathy also compulses us to be an emotional support even if we don't want to because of understanding how miserable having out of control emotions are. Because we are goal driven like INTJs it's frustrating when you want to get shit done but Fe drama is blocking you. I know our internal dialog is a lot like the INTJs as well but there is this mirror effect of making the other person uncomfortable by being as blunt as we want now makes us as uncomfortable. I know a big portion of our need to be considerate is based on this self protection. The Ni is great. The Ti is a great way to relax and learn things for fun and the Se is also very pleasant for seeing how beautiful the world is and having a more accurate sense of who people are. The Fe is normally the source of my misery.
This is fascinating… I have always seen him as an ESFJ, but I completely see what you’re saying. The NF “gas” is completely relatable to me as an ENFP; I’ll start rambling, then look around, and all the sudden realize that I have no idea what I was talking about. My problem is as an Ne, I think I can make it better by continuing to talk and hope to get it back on the rails 😂
Right! I can totally see myself doing what he did in this video, as an ENFP. Personality amd everything. Particularly if I didn't have time to write out what to say (which could be his case). Difference is Dave says the INFJ doesn't believe in the stuff he's saying and he's lying for Fe's sake, whereas I would have said the exact same thing he said but really wished them the best. I just wouldn't know how to properly articulate it. My pout at the end would've been more about myself not doing a good job conveying what I intended, not because it is BS
@@kellikakes81I know exactly what you. I was supposed to give a presentation at work and it didn’t go well, but gave the eulogy (that I wrote that morning) at my grandfather’s funeral and people *cheered*.
When I first got into personality and typing I thought it was kinda cool to be an INFJ, but as time’s gone on I’ve seen how much of a curse it actually is. I constantly feel torn in two and yes the Fe is an uncontrollable spout that spews from you that you can’t shut off. What I actually think and believe is rarely ever what I say because people can’t handle it and it wrecks their emotional state which wrecks my emotional state. It’s a headache most of the time
This is the most helpful video I have seen about my type. I have struggled for years to speak authentically and not bloviate. People even tell me I sound like a cartoon character bc my NF speech pattern is so over the top artificial. It’s cringy for even me to hear and I never knew it was part of my NF-ness. I spend a lot of time around people of other types just trying to learn their speech patterns and relate in a more even keeled manner. I spend a lot of energy trying to stay grounded in reality and do a ton of sensory things with other ST types. This video does inspire me to stay with it because I’ve recovered a bit from sounding just like Sean A. I do look just like him though.
I noticed this NFJ speak too... they go on a tangent without saying anything at all. No action plan Te, no analysis Ti, no sensory... just random fluff to hopefully lift the mood in the room by 1%.😅
Thank you so much for wearing burgundy, Dave! Next time, please have Shani paint your eyelashes with burgundy mascara and eyelids with burgundy eyeshadow. It'll be a real service to the community.
I dont see his care about others as being fake. Even though he laughed at the end. I see other causes. What i see is he did not prepare or make notes at all, not even an outline or cue cards. That is why his "speech" was all over the place and had no direction. His Fe was not wrong to try to say encouraging things, the problem is he didnt put any preparation into it (consume last?). He might have laughed at himself for doing such a bad job. He didnt even wear a suit or put a backdrop behind him. Maybe Fe needs to actually be in the auditorium and to feel the vibes of the tribe in order to speak well. He just wasnt taking it seriously. But Fe makes you care about people but he's never even met any of them before so he doesnt know them. 🤷♂️
As an infj i have often wished to be dumb. And oblivious to most things. I mean I'm oblivious to the obvious things but like. Yeah. And yesterday at our parish fete i literally told my brain to SHUT UP. Because it kept on looking at people being fake happy and telling me how they are just so sad within. Finally hubby and i went home. Well he's an istj so he had his reasons to leave. Also few days ago, my enfj cousin and i were watching a show and the girlfriend is crying and the boyfriend gets up and says "I'm gonna go get tissues". My enfj cousin's jaw drops and she looks at me and goes "he should have hugged her... tissues? Wtf bro" And i sat there thinking.. "what a gentleman." Like i would not want someone to hug me when i was crying. I specifically made a list of what should be done if i am sad or upset and gave it to my hubs. Tissues is obviously on the list.
I’m an infj married to an istp. I can relate. The list of things to do if you’re crying is pretty genius. I’ve done similar things like this in other ways with my husband but I like how straight forward a list is
I always start these videos thinking maybe I’m not actually an infj…but towards the end of the video I remembered that the other day I thought to myself “You know what your biggest problem is? You talk a lot of shit. You just open your mouth and shit comes out.” So I guess I’m on track? 🤷♀️
Same. I don't see it either especially that need to be seen as top of a hierarchy and creating this false image to be seen as cool. Seems like the last things an INFJ would care about.
@@shannon1242He's a social type #1 and Oi/Di. His OPS type makes a lot of sense with the definitions and coins. His sensory is too peacocky to be an obvious savior, the guy is an absolute annoying Blaster and a controlling asshole. Not all INFJs are responsible for the Fe lol.
This is where I get a little confused with the nuance. I'm definitely more pointed in the way I speak than this, I'll still cheerlead and praise. But I can't imagine being this direction-less in a formal speaking scenario ... I have notes, and bullet points, and instructions. I've been pretty convinced I'm Ni-Ti (F/F without a doubt). HOWEVER, Fe still takes me for a ride every single day. And often I want to surgically remove the Fe, because managing everyone's feelings is exhausting but necessary.
*ROODEEEEE!* Something to think about: In one of Jung's final interviews, his interlocutor makes mention of how common place it was (at the time of the interview) for people to throw around the terms: "Introvert & Extrovert." How many years ago was that?? Furthermore, um, *was Jung-clearly a Se user btw-a Scientist, or not, folks?* 🤔 Goodnight.
One of the things I've always said about INFJ's (as an INFJ) is you know you're a real INFJ if you hate being an INFJ. When you first encounter MBTI & all that you're like "yes I am amazing and special" then the realization that from a biological perspective the reason you're rare is because the world can mostly function without you and you're kinda shitty at life, you're just like "oh... damn..."
Gandhi is an INFJ ultra Pro max. I have read his biography and also seen some documentaries. I know it's nowhere near enough research but there are several factors that perfectly align with his Cognitive Functions.
Yes!!! What you said at the end is sooo us! We know the future. We know young adults are waking into their hell. We can even see specifics given their attitude and personality the types of garbage they will bring on.....but the rest of the Fe world will punch you if you say it.
So far I've realized double deciding is the easiest thing to identify. If the middle functions pinging off each other, T and F then they're prolly IJ or EP. Then look at savior and heel to see where they swing hard.
Jordan Peterson is an ENTJ, he is by the book and that’s also why he is so cut throat, direct and outspoken with people like the prime minister of Canada (btw Justin is an ENFJ) who makes up censorship laws when he is made to feel bad or look bad. JP is also very much about his wealth, and understands the value of Te machinations overall which is why he rights books like the 12 Rules you should have in place for a strong foundation in life etc, etc…. Also he is quick to bring up his credentials and accomplishments when his credibility is being questioned and of course talks about the importance of having a good reputation - all Te values at the forefront of his work and life motto.
They don’t recognize personality disorders in their typing so it’s off. NPD, BPD, or psychopathy. Arrogant and smug about their 512 but not for those who laid the path to their information
Seems like it huh. You gotta take into account the femNi looks like Ne, and the whole debating thing is caused by SAVIOUR Ti… yeah that’s right, the four letter types lie to you, Top G is a thinker brah. In all seriousness though, within the context of the whole OP system and NOT LOOKING AT MBTI (Jesus Christ), Andrew Tate is actually a pretty intense and easy to read example of someone **of his type**. Like all those crazy Ni/Ti consume lasts are like that and he’s just them but cranked the fuck up on the good shit, the “saviour function crack” 😂.. so yeah looking at the bigger picture and really tryina get all that 16P shit out the way, Andrew Tate definitely… is.. an INFJ without a doubt.
@@Aelo-1the other saviors column is referring to the animals. There is a mistake here - the 2 and the A should be the other way round because Play is the second savior in Sean's case, not Sleep.
He flexes a lot of Se but all of his talks are woo-woo. Matrix is not real, it is an analogy. He doesn't talk about real thins, details, data. Everything is categorised as ''Matrix''.
He doesn't respect the facts, is all woowoo talk and is full of analogies, stretches and guesses with no proof to back them up. The guy is a literal hippie with a rifle. He's just aggressive and unfriendly.
I can give my 2 cents (edit) Infjs, *_can be_* really patriotic Now I don't mean country, I mean group, following the best "how to do things". This is "my" group, and if we all get along and do our "best", nothing can stop us! Isn't that what he always talks about? Respect women, act like a man, do hard sh*t, become masculine, become the best version of yourself It's all Fe and Ni talk, all the way! The optimal group, the optimal you, and the optimal way of doing things by *_being_* you But, It's not people focused Fe _first_ , it's Ni "if everybody in the group follows the *_SYSTEM_* or "the way of how to do things properly", that's where the money's at" Make sense? Then you can take that one step further, you know... Hitler, infj, ein reich... etc. We differ from Te people who believe that you can WORK through anything We believe instead that you can EXPLORE yourself to the best way of doing, and _then_ you win, not by working hard If you listen to Andrew Tate you can sense the same thing, it's not about working on it, it's about DOING the thing the best you can That's why infjs have a hard time to "get things done", we want to be masters from _the beginning_ by Ni
Just stop feeling guilty for other people's feelings and stop thinking their emotional state is the infj responsibility. If your intent is pure don't be insecure.
If Sean Astin's an INFJ then why did we spend the majority of the video talking about his Fe and not his Ni? Shouldn't the video be about his overuse of Ni and not how fake his Fe is?
